Archive of Our Own

Moonlight galloped over the clay soil, her hoofs pounding loudly through the forest. Any attempt at secrecy was no longer useful and so Alanna threw all of Moonlight’s considerable energy into speed. She only had the barest bones of a map in her mind but—there—Alanna emerged from the forest of Eviana to see a rising fortress and castle in the distance. She didn’t spare even a moment to take in the sprawling vista of the walled city as she urged Moonlight faster.

Eldorne.

We’ll make it in time, Faithful said from his cup, but to Alanna, his voice sounded carefully neutral.

Alanna didn’t answer.

At the gate, Alanna descended from Moonlight, her shield deliberately visible as she stopped at the first guard that she saw.

“I need to speak with the captain of the guard immediately,” she said, keeping her voice low.

The guard and his partner looked to Alanna’s shield and then up to her copper locks, cut just above her shoulder.

“Certainly, Lady Alanna,” the guard said and then spoke something in a whisper to his companion who departed immediately. There was a time in which Alanna would have resented that these guards knew who she was from word of mouth, but she couldn’t even pretend that she was anything other than grateful for the quick and respectful reception she’d received.

Now that question remained—would she continue to receive it? Alanna looked over her shoulder, trying to map out the land to the east.

“If you’ll come with me,” the guard who’d departed had returned and he beckoned her and gestured for Alanna to leave Moonlight with a new guard who’d arrived with him. Alanna handed over the reins as Faithful took his usual perch on her shoulder.

Quicker—and yet not quickly enough for Alanna’s prickling neck—she was shown through the fortress up to the guards’ training yard where she was directed further to an office where the captain of the guard, a burly man some thirty years’ Alanna’s senior sat at a desk.

“Lady Alanna of Olau,” he said, his voice curious as his eyes flicked to Faithful, “We’re honored with your presence. What can I help you with?”

“Tusaine is coming,” Alanna said and if she’d wanted dramatics, she would have been disappointed by only a rising of the eyebrows. Not much ruffled this man.

“Are you certain?” he asked.

“Yes,” she said. The memory was so near, it was almost present in front of her. “My man, Coram, and I were camping near the foothills of the Tusaine Mountains. We saw almost five thousand men making their way out of the Elders Pass.”

“It’s been unpassable for a century,” the captain said.

“Well, by weather or magic, it appears that is no longer the case,” Alanna said. “And they are headed in this direction.”

“Who is headed in this direction?” A light female voice that Alanna had been long familiar with, always grating just so, spoke from near the door. Alanna could not hide her flinch nor could she stop herself from spinning around, her hand going to weapon at her side. Only a concentrated effort allowed her to relax her hand.

“Lady Delia,” Alanna said and bowed. Her heart beat so loudly, Lady Delia could probably hear it pounding across the room. She’d imagined this moment constantly across her dash from the Tusaine foothills to Eldorne. In most of her imaginings, this was the point where Lady Delia began to immediately mock what little credibility Alanna had managed to establish with the captain of the guard.

“Lord Alan—Lady Alanna,” Lady Delia said, her voice cool and deliberate. “It’s been too long.” There was a long pause as Lady Delia evaluated Alanna, the corners of her lips curling with mirth. “I seem to remember when you were someone else entirely.”

Alanna did not start shouting. She did not push Lady Delia. She didn’t move, instead she directed her voice to the captain, because even a knight as errant as she knew that it was rude to turn her back to a lady. Even one like Lady Delia. “They will be here in no less than a day,” she said instead. “The Tusaines.”

Alanna was rewarded a second time by Lady Delia going still, the color flooding from her face. “They are marching on Eldorne?”

“So it would appear, my lady,” Alanna said. “We don’t have much time.”

Lady Delia looked over at the captain and something passed between them.

“What is it?” Alanna said. Neither said anything for a minute. “If you’re in league with the Tusaines, please challenge me now rather than put me in a cell again.”

Lady Delia’s eyes flashed anger, but she didn’t lash out. “My father and brother are not here,” she said. “They’d taken a sizeable portion of our guard with them to go fight against the raiding pirates in the south.”

“How sizeable?” Alanna said. From what she knew, Eldorne didn’t keep a large garrisoned force to begin with.

This time, the captain’s eyes flicked to Lady Delia and she clenched her jaw but spoke. “Half,” she said.

All three of them stood there for a minute, the distinct possibilities of what might happen potently filling the air.

“We must ring the war bells,” Lady Delia said. “We will need to alert all who can make it before their soldiers arrive.”

“They will siege you, my lady,” Alanna said. “Coram and I split up, he is headed straight for Corus, but it is almost a week away. And even then, they’ll need to raise the troops.”

“You would prefer I surrender?” Lady Delia asked.

Alanna didn’t want that exactly. But Eldorne would need to withstand the siege for as long as it took for Tortall’s army to arrive—and then, presumably the time it took for the two armies to battle and decide a winner. Tusaine seemed determined to carve a piece of Tortall for itself and if Eldorne didn’t surrender and was unable to withstand the siege, the Tusaines could vent their displeasure in a number of horrific ways. To think it went against the Code of Chivalry, but Alanna knew first-hand that King Ain’s brothers had no loyalty to anything approaching the Code.

Alanna inclined her head at Lady Delia. “This is your home,” she said. “This decision has to be yours.”

Lady Delia’s eyes snapped to the captain. “Please have the war bells rung and have the guards ride out to help bring people in.” Her eyes flicked to Alanna again. “To the extent possible, bring animals—animals that will—” she didn’t finish the thought—animals that could be slaughtered for food or that produced food. “—Animals that will be helpful for a long siege,” she finished delicately.

The captain nodded. “It will be done.”

Lady Delia looked at her hands. “I will attend to the other affairs,” she said and then was gone, leaving Alanna and the captain standing there. The captain looked pale, while Alanna felt something like anger fade away leaving her drained and exhausted.

“Will you stay and help us?” he asked.

Alanna wasn’t exactly sure what she could conceivably help with, but she had never run from a fight yet. A siege would certainly be a new experience. “Of course,” she said. “What can I help with?”

The captain quickly found work for her. While Alanna conferred with Eldorne’s man-at-arms going through the inventory of weaponry and putting together a list of what they would need to procure to defend against a siege, she heard the bells begin pealing out in quick, unceasing booms, like never-ending thunder from the heavens.

War was coming.

The last of the villagers living outside the city were brought in by sunset and the gates were closed—a finality and painfulness to the clang as the drawbridges were pulled up. Alanna watched it all from atop the city’s walls, next to a group of young soldiers that she’d befriended in the morning. Geoff, Ben and Honna had been awed and tongue-tied around Alanna at first as they’d helped her in the armory, but she’d teased them and charmed them with her stories from her adventures until they’d lost that awestruck look. Now, they were teasing each other as a way to dissipate their nervous energy and Alanna half-listened to their comments insulting each other’s manhood as she looked to the east, wondering if they’d see the army arriving with the dying vestiges of the day’s sun.

A messenger tapped Alanna on the shoulder and handed her a note. It was a request from Lady Delia to join her and the captain in the castle. Alanna followed the messenger down from the wall, through the barracks and training yard to one of the many castle entrances. She tried to keep track of the many twists and turns once inside, but she was soon lost and gave herself over to just following the messenger until they arrived at a polished wooden door, where the messenger knocked twice.

The door opened to reveal the captain and two other men, also dressed in the dark blue and yellow uniforms of Eldorne, and Lady Delia sitting at a large wooden desk, a series of neatly stacked piles in front of her.

Lady Delia’s jaw clenched when she saw Alanna, but she gave no other outward display of her emotions, and instead stood, a stack of papers in her hands.

“I’ve had our stores inventoried as well as the animals brought in today,” Lady Delia said. “I have a rough census of the castle as of sunset—my steward is in process of figuring out accommodations at the moment. We’ll need to figure out rations. I assume that we’ll all be on strict diets starting today.”

Alanna gaped a little at Lady Delia. In so far as she had thought about Lady Delia’s reaction—and she’d tried not to think about it overmuch when she was riding here—she’d assumed that Lady Delia would be skeptical and scornful. Mocking at the very least.

She hadn’t assumed any actual helpfulness or, gods forbid, competency. She took the pages that Delia held out and scanned it and then handed it over to the captain, who reviewed it and then handed it to one of the men next to him, who he introduced as Lieutenant Bray.

“What are our defensive capabilities?” Lady Delia asked, her perfect eyebrows severe and her lips firm, as she looked to Captain Isanza.

Captain Isanza began listing out the number of men that they had and the summation of the armory inventory. “To be frank, my lady, we are severely understaffed. We will need to recruit as many men and boys that are able bodied and willing from the castle to serve if they attack Eldorne.”

He looked again at Alanna. “I would also appreciate your experience and advice, Lady Knight.”

Alanna felt her eyebrows raise. “Mine?”

The captain smiled and chuckled, taking off ten years from his face. “Yes, yours. I’m given to understand that you fought in the Battle of the Drell River and that you’ve spent some time fighting up on the border of Scanra. This castle hasn’t been attacked in over four hundred years, when Giamo the Tyrant used the Dominion Jewel to clear the Elders Pass for his army’s entry. We will all be learning together, unfortunately, and I welcome any experience that you are willing to share.”

“Of course,” Alanna promised. “I’ll help in whatever way I can.” Alanna shot another look at Lady Delia. “Lady Delia, I,” she hesitated—her old fear rising up in her, the sleeping spell in the Drell Valley—but ignoring it would only keep them helpless against what might come. “We should also take an inventory of whomever has the Gift. I can’t say that I’m much help with defensive spells or magic, but if the Tusaines come, then we should be ready for what they might do.”

Lady Delia made a note on the page in front of her. “Anyone who is Gifted?” she said. “I’ll see who can be found. You should be aware, Lady Alanna, that few here will have been formally trained.”

Alanna shrugged awkwardly. “I can do some teaching,” and she thought back to Kara and Kourrem. “Anything will be better than sitting here defenseless waiting for them to put rot into our food stores or turn the water. Maybe they won’t have a sorcerer capable of that with them, but I’d rather be wrong and prepared.”

Lady Delia sat, composed, and thought through what Alanna had just said. Alanna could see the clenching of her fingers around her quill, where the tips of her fingers went white. Interesting—that the magic should be the thing that she was most scared of and not the slow starving to death or the potential pillaging in the event of a successful Tusaine attack. Alanna had thought that Lady Delia had some ability with the Gift—she’d almost certainly used a small glamour at court, the magic showing itself as faint green when Alanna had seen evidence of her spellwork.

Alanna carefully touched her ember necklace. Nothing emanated from Lady Delia at all. No use of magic at the moment. Which didn’t necessarily mean anything, but was something to note.

“Thank you, Captain Isanza,” Lady Delia said after she wrote something down. “Lady Alanna, if you would stay a moment.”

“Of course,” Alanna said automatically.

Now comes the fun part, Faithful said from the floor. Alanna ignored him.

Once the captain and his two lieutenants were gone, Lady Delia looked up at Alanna, her green eyes fully focused on Alanna. A bolt of caution went straight down Alanna’s back.

Alanna both dreaded and longed for what Lady Delia was sure to bring up—Jon. A nice dividing body between them—but even if Jon had never been there, they would have certainly found other ways to hate each other. Lady Delia had disliked Alanna, then Alan, from the start, delighting in forcing Alanna to do her constant favors and using Alanna to pit the squires and knights against each other. Alanna disliked petty jealousies and bullying.

No, they never would have been friends, even if they hadn’t both slept with Jon. But Jon’s affections had crystallized what had always been certain to occur. Lady Delia and Alanna were natural enemies and would be natural enemies.

But Alanna wouldn’t let that stop her from doing everything in her power to save Eldorne. Would Lady Delia feel the same?

“Let’s not pretend that we’re friends,” Lady Delia said.

“Are you sure?” Alanna said, dryly. “We might have been able to convince someone, somewhere.”

“Perhaps a goal for the future,” Lady Delia said in a tone that matched Alanna’s. “We are not friends. But I believe that we have a common goal here. I am certain that my father and brother would have preferred that almost anyone male in the family had been here to take charge. But they are not, so I will have to be my home’s defender. Whatever I can do, I will do it.” As she spoke, her eyes glittered with intensity and Alanna felt another sense of foreboding sizzle its way across her skin.

“As will I, my lady,” Alanna said quietly.

“Good,” Lady Delia said. “Then I believe that we understand each other.” She started writing something and then looked back up at Alanna and Faithful, the barest hint of a smile curving her lips.

“Your cat is looking surprisingly well,” Lady Delia said and Faithful glared at her. The feeling was mutual. “With the close quarters, I’d be careful about your cat spreading fleas,” Lady Delia said and then immediately turned down to her work, a clear dismissal even as Faithful tensed and Alanna grabbed for Faithful before he could do something that got them both in trouble.

How would she like it if I asked her if she had fleas? Faithful asked, incensed.

“Goodnight, Lady Delia,” Alanna ground out and backed out of the room where the same messenger as earlier was waiting, ready to deliver Alanna to Captain Isanza.

She met with the captain and his staff in his office—a set of officers clearly used to dealing with minor banditry or the occasional participation in the King’s service, but who had rarely handled anything approaching a professional army.

None of the soldiers were Gifted, so Alanna dug around in what she’d learned over the years for what passed for defensive magic. She’d learned a shielding spell from Maude of all people, although it had been meant for a physical attack on her person, and set about casting that around the area facing the direction that the Tusaine army was likely to arrive from. She didn’t have enough power to make anything substantive of it and it would fail at the first hardy fire spell cast, but it at least would let Alanna know that a spell had been cast and perhaps give some warning.

When she let the captain know about her plans, there were more than a few subtle glances and she wasn’t sure if it was at concern for what she was doing or what the Tusaines might be doing, but regardless, it needed to be done.

She’d assumed that she would be dismissed, but Captain Isanza wanted Alanna’s opinion on what the Tusaines might do—it seemed that her experience against the Tusaines in the Drell Valley conflict was the only first-hand experience anyone at the castle had with the Tusaines in battle—and it was clear that not many had much other first-hand experience with battle either: the captain and a few of the lieutenants had fought in the King’s army but no one save Alanna had gone through a knight’s training and few had fought against another army within the last few years.

They’re looking for you to tell them what to do, Faithful said, during a lull in the discussion. And just like that, Alanna looked around the room and realized that Captain Isanza and his lieutenants were all watching her for her input. She’d never imagined herself leading anything more than a charge and she wished that Jon or Raoul or Gary were there to weigh in.

But there was only Alanna, so she swallowed and forced herself to approach it how she’d been trained. She relayed what the Tusaines had done during the Drell Valley campaign and talked about what she’d heard of sieges in general—meager as that information was.

After they’d discussed a hundred different contingencies for assaults, the captain dismissed everyone and suggested that those not on watch head to their beds for rest while they could have it. Alanna went in search of someone who could tell her where she could sleep. She’d been riding almost without stop for two days—an hour or two here and there to let Moonlight rest. She felt dead on her feet and emotionally wrung out from her encounter with Lady Delia.

Lady Delia had been different—well, same in some ways, but different in others. Somewhat disconcertingly to Alanna, she’d changed since Corus. Alanna had expected to meet one version of Delia. She’d certainly gotten that experience at first—but then…things hadn’t played out the way Alanna had thought they would. The whole day hadn’t gone the way that she’d expected—she’d thought that there would be more passionate explanations needed. An adversary to convince who would mock her the way that Lady Delia had once delighted in back in Corus.

Well, it had been a couple years, Alanna reminded herself. And this was a good thing. She’d changed too. It was only natural that Lady Delia would as well.

But Alanna’s head was convinced that it was all still some trick. It had almost been a relief when Lady Delia had mocked her in private—an echo of Alanna’s normalcy.

So perhaps the things that were important about Delia had not changed, Alanna thought. And was almost cheered by that idea.

Alanna found a maid, who directed her to the castle’s steward, who then directed Alanna to one of the many guest rooms in Eldorne castle. A different maid offered to bring Alanna warm water to wash with, but Alanna declined the offer. Better to save the water, especially when Alanna hoped to be quickly fast asleep.

Once she’d changed into a shift that someone had procured for her, Alanna crawled into bed and was asleep before her head hit the pillow.

Alanna was shaken awake at dawn, although she felt like she’d barely slept at all. “My lady, they’ve arrived,” a young boy said and Alanna quickly rose and dressed, grabbing her sword.

The boy took her up to the walls and over to where one of the lieutenants, a man named Rauf, stood. Together, they watched in the early morning light as troops arrived out of the far end of the forest, filling up the cleared farmlands in between Eviana forest and Eldorne castle.

Alanna’s memory hadn’t deceived her. There were probably five thousand men, their banners and standards flying proudly in the air. Their lines were orderly and even at this distance, she could hear the noise of war preparations. Trumpets and men’s voices rising in song as they marched towards Eldorne.

Alanna’s body rebelled at the inaction—she wanted to rush out and meet the men where they stood. Leap into battle. Fight for honor and victory. But even she could admit that these were not just poor odds. Insanity may have run in her family, but to go out now would be her death and the death of any force that joined her. Eldorne needed every last defender.

By mid-morning, the opposing forces had drawn close enough that they had begun to stop and begin preparations for their own defense, digging trenches, scouting groups splitting off to forage—or worse—from the land.

They would almost certainly try to attack at some point—and Alanna felt a sort of detached numbness at the thought of waiting here until that point came. It could be in broad daylight if Duke Hilam’s arrogance was sufficient, but they were just as likely to attack in the dead of night and press an advantage without light.

From the ranks, a man rode out on a dark warhorse, a white flag held in his hand. The lieutenant and Alanna looked at each other and then made their way to Captain Isanza. The captain sent out Rauf for a parley, the drawbridge lowering and creaking ominously, retracting once he’d descended. The main drawbridge descended a second time when Rauf emerged from the parley, heading back bearing the Tusaines’ terms.

Lady Delia had appeared by this time in the courtyard just inside the wall—her hair pulled back into an intricate braided knot at the crown of her head and wearing an embroidered lilac gown belted at her waist and a cloak to protect against the elements. She should have looked out of place, but her expression brooked no argument. They went into a small guards’ room in the wall and Lady Delia beckoned to Lieutenant Rauf to speak.

“They ask for our total surrender. If we surrender, they will allow the women and children to leave the city and they will ransom the men to Tortall.

“Is that all?” Lady Delia asked, her voice saccharine sweet. “I’m afraid that we’ll have to decline their offer.”

Captain Isanza nodded at Lady Delia and then sent the lieutenant back. Alanna would have gone to watch, but Lady Delia nodded at Alanna.

“Lady Alanna, loath as I am to impose upon you,” she started, the words painfully familiar to Alanna—when she’d left the castle in Corus, she’d hoped to never hear them again!—“but I am in need of some assistance with the rationing and supplies that we briefly discussed yesterday.”

And what was there to say but “Yes, of course, Lady Delia.” As Alanna followed Delia out, she wished that perhaps she had gone out to challenge the entirety of the Tusaine forces currently outside. Maybe there was that much insanity in the Trebond family.

Surprisingly, there was too much work for even Lady Delia to set about making Alanna’s life more miserable. Alanna and Lady Delia spent several hours going through the notes that Lady Delia had taken on the stores and the census to plan enough for a two-month siege.

“We could stretch it to three months,” Lady Delia said, her voice trailing off to what she and Alanna both knew.

“But then, we would have to chose how to staff a full force on half-day rations,” Alanna finished. Tortall would be at Eldorne within a few weeks—provided that Eldorne was able to resist any attacks—physical or magical—until Tortall’s arrival, there was a good likelihood of Tortall being able to resupply Eldorne via the river or able to drive the Tusaine army away.

But there was no certainty of it.

“I think that two-third rations this week should be good,” Alanna said. “And will give us a chance to see what can be preserved.”

“We’ll also need to figure out the animals,” Lady Delia said and made another note in her book. “We’ll want to start preserving meat in preparation.” She made a moue of distaste. “And several hundred animals defecating constantly.”

Alanna let out a small, uncontrolled laugh before she caught herself and closed her mouth. Lady Delia turned and looked at her, her lips curving into that faintly mocking smile that Alanna was intimately familiar with. 

“Before I lose the pleasure of your company, Lady Alanna,” Lady Delia said, “I wanted you to have this.” She passed Alanna a list of names—none of whom meant anything to her. Alanna lifted her eyebrows in question. “The list of the Gifted inhabitants of Eldorne. I’ve arranged for them to meet you all this afternoon. Does that work for you?”

What could Alanna say to that? No, she had another appointment at the same time? Perhaps Lord Gareth was dropping in for some tea.

“Of course, my lady,” Alanna said.

Alanna spent the afternoon feeling out the edges of ability for a group of perhaps fifteen people—mostly all children or teenagers, although a few people who were around Alanna’s age, as well as a castle healer and a local healing woman. The healer, Kieran, and healing woman, Arla, were clearly the best of the group and Alanna showed them how to begin to craft very simple defensive spell work.

The others, she had to start with basic exercises. With her charges among the Bloody Hawk, they’d had enough power that she was able to jump to higher-level magic almost from the beginning. She wasn’t able to do that with her new group of students and they spent most of the afternoon practicing gaining an affinity for their type of Gift.

Something in Alanna protested that she was wasting time when she could be helping guard the castle, but she reminded herself that Eldorne needed to be able to defend itself magically. Loathe as she was to admit it, she was in the best position to teach it.

And, as the afternoon went on, Alanna was able to get a few of them to set a small stick on fire and a different few to summon up a basic shield. Something in her began to feel warm and proud of what they’d accomplished. Kieran was also able to help with a few that had noticed that they’d been able to help with simple healing.

Perhaps you’re destined to take students on wherever you go, Faithful said, but he didn’t sound mocking, instead thoughtful.

“Maybe,” Alanna said slowly.

That night, Alanna joined for dinner in the castle’s great hall, a large hall that soared up, decorated with beautiful murals that stretched across the walls. Somehow, Lady Delia and Alanna had ended up at the same table and Alanna couldn’t find a way to leave without drawing attention to herself.

Instead, she focused on eating her food knowing that in the very near future, their supplies could rapidly change.

So focused was she on her food that she missed the first part of a conversation and only was alerted to herself as a topic of the conversation when she heard one of the men—perhaps the steward’s assistant?—skeptically say, “—with Lady Alanna?”

“Oh yes,” Lady Delia said, her voice and eyes laughing in such merriment, that one could be forgiven for thinking that this was any other evening instead of the first of a siege. “We often danced with one another. Lady Alanna asked me to dance almost every night.” Her voice seemed to ring out throughout the hall as Alanna felt her face heat up.

A hundred sets of inquisitive eyes flew in Alanna’s direction.

Alanna thought of the worst curses she knew in five languages before she managed to paste a cheery grin on and call out, “Lady Delia is such a superb dancer—I couldn’t resist. Although, by the same token, as I recall, Lady Delia often asked me to squire her around the castle or to palace events, which, of course, it was a pleasure to do.”

Lady Delia’s cheeks reddened slightly, but she kept her bright smile on as she brought a hand up and giggled, as if they were engaging in a youthful game of flirtation. She whispered something to the woman next to her, who looked over at Alanna and then burst into peals of laughter.

Absolutely fantastic, Alanna fumed.

The next day was like the first—Alanna had never been especially fond of the wait aspect of battle and she expected that this would be even worse than most. When she woke early to do her training, she ran through a list of things that she could do: come up with a magic training regimen for her students, work with Captain Isanza to see if she could be of any assistance with the guard and cast any preventative spells to help the food supplies stretch longer.

For the last item on her list, she would have to work with Lady Delia and Alanna preemptively winced at the thought. Maybe she could put that one to the very end of her day…

But Alanna soon found out that avoiding Lady Delia was futile. After she cleaned up after her morning training, Alanna tried to sneak a quick breakfast but Lady Delia’s voice called to Alanna as she grabbed some bread and cheese from the trays that had been laid out in the great hall.

Alanna froze and Lady Delia was there not a moment later. “My lady Alanna,” she said as Alanna thought that she could come to hate the sound of her own name, “I am so sorry to impose, but I wondered if you might do me a favor?”

Alanna wondered if she had ended up back in the Ordeal of Knighthood and no one had bothered to tell her.

“Of course, Lady Delia,” she ground out. And then, feeling like an idiot, but unable to help herself, she continued, “And it’s Sir Knight.”

“Oh,” Lady Delia said, raising her eyebrows. “Sir Knight. I apologize. Sir Alanna, I’m concerned about the state of the latrines,” she said, still smiling that same smile that made Alanna feel like she was going crazy. “In his report, Captain Isanza said that the main latrines, which feed into the river, should be closed up to prevent entry. However, we will soon begin to build up waste.” Alanna nodded. “I thought perhaps that we might see if we can connect the latrines with the moat,” she said. “As one more way to defend the castle. And it will start to build up very quickly if we don’t find another way to offload it.”

It wasn’t a bad idea. It was, in fact, a good idea. Alanna thought it over, tried to find the flaw in it, but Lady Delia was right. The waste would build up and while a waste-filled moat may not provide the largest of deterrents, it certainly would not help any attackers.

“Thank you, Lady Delia,” Alanna said. “That is an excellent idea.”

Lady Delia’s secretary, a young woman named Brenna who Alanna had seen several times in Lady Delia’s company, helped Alanna find the master mason, who, in turn, scrounged up a team of builders who set to creating the diversions into the moat. When Alanna left them to meet with her class of students with the Gift, they were well underway and cheery about their somewhat unpleasant task.

That night, again, Alanna found herself at the same table with Lady Delia. Alanna told herself that she only needed to stay just long enough to appear to be reasonably respectful.

Lady Delia playfully flirted her way through the dinner, rising several times and going from table to table, striking up conversations with a guild master or Captain Isanza’s wife. Lady Delia seemed to know most of the people in the great hall and she smiled and laughed at whatever anyone seemed to be telling her.

Alanna watched her and wondered. It took a great deal of nerve in the face of a siege to pretend to everyone that life was continuing as normal. By looking at Lady Delia, one would assume that the siege was a minor inconvenience at its worst, despite just how brutal Alanna knew that it might possibly get. Based on their conversation during the first night, Lady Delia also knew what might be awaiting them. And yet, Lady Delia seemed to effortlessly maintain her façade, letting her populace take a great deal of heart from it.

Even Alanna found herself cheered by it—she thought back to the night prior. She’d certainly felt refueled by Lady Delia’s needling. Perhaps Lady Delia hadn’t meant any positive effect and it had simply been a coincidence. Or perhaps Lady Delia had known that Alanna was certainly not her biggest admirer and had let Alanna take comfort in their old animosity.

Alanna had planned to leave once she could easily disappear without notice, but she found herself lingering until her table was half-empty, watching Lady Delia and seeing how she managed the room. Finally, when she knew that she needed to rest in order to be present the next day, she excused herself and headed to her room.

The next day, the Tusaines began testing the magical defenses of the city. Alanna’s defensive spell had been laying there, at the back of her mind, not requiring much effort to keep it in place, but suddenly, in the middle of walking to breakfast after she’d cleaned herself from her training, she felt a sharp slice to her core. It was so sudden and unexpected, that Alanna looked down, expecting to see blood pouring out of her, and only then did she realize that someone had attacked Eldorne magically.

She immediately began to pour herself into the defensive netting that she’d set up, channeling her magic into reinforcing the basic spell. She held her ember necklace and looked out the nearest window towards the Tusaines, only to see a copper color swirling above the encampment and heading towards Eldorne.

Someone tried speaking to her and Faithful was meowing loudly, but Alanna had no energy left for anything other than the protection of Eldorne. She kept pouring more and more of her purple flame into the protection of the spell, willing it to last longer than the magic attacking it. Finally—finally—the attack began to ease up, and Alanna felt like she could breathe again.

She opened her eyes and looked around her for Faithful, who had paused his yowling and was watching her anxiously, before a wave of sheer exhaustion rushed over her and she fainted.

When Alanna woke, she was in a bright room in a comfortable bed. Faithful was resting on her chest licking her face. Kieran was next to her, his face worried as he passed a hand over her chest, presumably healing her or checking for injury. When Alanna turned her head revealing that she was in her room—or at least the room that had been hers for the last few days—her body tender and smarting, Kieran sighed with deep relief.

“How long have I been asleep?” Alanna asked, dreading the answer. Two days, Faithful said. Alanna winced.

Kieran sighed and began checking Alanna’s pulse and face. “Two days,” he said, unintentionally echoing Faithful. “I’m not going to attempt to lecture you, but you almost died. You expended too much energy.”

Alanna wasn’t really in a position to explain that this wasn’t unusual for a huge expense of her magic, but opted to keep her mouth firmly closed. Faithful glared at her.

“What happened after I fainted?” Alanna asked.

“Well, there was a bit of chaos on our side as our best asset in magic passed out, and it seemed that the Tusaines were able to cast a spell to spoil our water supply and turn some of our foods provisions. Fortunately, Arla and I were able to counter some of the effects of it.”

“How bad?” Alanna asked.

Kieran sighed. “Probably a month of our stores. You would need to check with Lady Delia. The water was less affected.”

Alanna rubbed her face, a headache making itself known against her temples.

“It could have been worse,” Kieran said gently.

“It could have been better,” Alanna countered.

Kieran shrugged expansively. “No one blames you—you did much more than we could have if you hadn’t been here. We still have a reasonable amount of water and food. If we have less—we’ll find ways to make it stretch.”

With Kieran comforting Alanna, it felt somehow worse than if she’d just berated herself.

“Again, I wouldn’t dream of lecturing you,” Kieran said, his twenty-plus years on Alanna looking down at her, his brow stern, “but I would suggest that you not exercise any magic for at least another few days. Arla and I were able to recreate your defensive spell, along with help from the rest of your students. I won’t pretend that it’s nearly as powerful as yours, but I suspect that it is sufficient to fool the Tusaines. I suspect that they had to use a massive expenditure of magic as well. And if not, it is still better to let your body heal yourself.”

Alanna nodded. Kieran was right. She told him as much. “I should have let everyone take more of the responsibility, it’s just—I…” she trailed off.

Kieran smiled, lighting up his face. “It is hard to give up control.” Kieran had no idea, Alanna thought ruefully. 

“Thank you for healing me,” she said.

Kieran raised his eyebrows. “Lady Delia was the one to do the honors,” he said. “By the time that I’d been notified, she’d put you into a protective sleep spell.

Faithful agreed with that. She was fast, he said, sounding reluctantly impressed. Before I could even tell her what had happened, she was there. Maybe one of these days, you’ll learn restraint, because even those protected by the gods have their limits.

 “I’m sorry,” she said to Faithful, trying to also put her apology into each stroke while she petted him. Kieran left not long after, his resources also stretched thin. Alanna wanted to take the opportunity to try and think of a more sustainable solution to the Tusaine magical attack, but instead she just found herself thinking about Lady Delia.

Had she felt some amount of anger and regret at having to heal Alanna? Was she glad that Alanna had been brought to her knees?

Did Alanna want Lady Delia to hate her? Alanna’s head felt fuzzy and she passed back to sleep, Faithful, a warm burr by her side.

By dinnertime, Alanna felt well enough that she was prowling around her room, restless and wanting to be returned to duty. Unfortunately, a tray had been sent up for her and she felt too awkward to refuse it, instead eating in her room and feeling a bit like she was going to go stir-crazy. She wondered if Lady Delia was eating in the great hall.

She also reminded herself that Lady Delia had delighted in playing mind games with every single male (and the unexpected female) when she’d been in Corus.

She thought about Lady Delia leaning over Alanna while she’d been unconscious, her hands touching Alanna, and Alanna felt a pang of something hot and molten go straight through her body.

Alanna needed to stop thinking about Lady Delia.

Something on your mind? Faithful asked, perched on the bed.

Alanna shot Faithful a glare and then shot her door another glare. That was it—she was going to go to the barracks and find something to do even if it was sit in the forge and help hand tools to a blacksmith or clean bandages at the laundry.

Maybe she should write a note to thank Lady Delia—and now she was behaving exactly like all those idiot boys from when she’d been a squire.

“I’m going to go find something to do,” Alanna said with as much dignity as she could muster. Faithful shot her a knowing glance.

Before she could put plan to action, someone knocked at the door and Alanna opened it to reveal a young girl, one of Lady Delia’s maids. Alanna thought her name was Milenna.

“I’ve come with a message, Sir Alanna,” the girl said, curtseying.

“Of course,” Alanna said and smiled at Milenna, who immediately blushed as she told Alanna that Lady Delia wanted to see Alanna in her study.

Alanna felt her heart begin to pound in fear—consternation—stress—something that made butterflies dance in her stomach and she wasn’t sure if she wanted to run to the study and get the meeting over with or hide in her room and refuse to go.

Well—she wasn’t a coward and she’d never backed down in her life, she reminded herself. Taking a steadying breath, she nodded to Milenna and followed her through the maze of hallways.

Alanna found herself outside Lady Delia’s door. Milenna rapped on the door and Lady Delia opened it wearing a neatly-pressed dark blue dress with a low-cut neck.

“Thank you, Milenna,” Lady Delia said. “That will be all.” The girl bowed and then Lady Delia opened the door further to let Alanna in.

“Sir Alanna,” Lady Delia said. “I heard—” she cut herself and smiled again at Alanna in a way that Alanna just knew meant that whatever came out of her mouth next would not in any way be true to Lady Delia’s actual intent. “I wanted to hear your assessment of when we might expect relief.”

Alanna heard the words, but there was something underneath Lady Delia’s words. Was it worry? Lady Delia’s eyes flicked up and down Alanna’s body, perhaps assessing if Alanna had recovered from the attack. Or was that wishful thinking? I heard that you had woken up—had that been what Lady Delia was going to ask?

Alanna thought carefully about her words. “It will take some time for the King to muster an army,” she said. “If Coram was able to get to one of the King’s agents in Glass Lake and they were able to get to the capital with all due haste, then they would have been notified perhaps today. Perhaps a few weeks to raise the men given the size of Tusaine’s army. And then likely another two weeks to arrive.”

Lady Delia nodded, as if Alanna had imparted new information, although they’d discussed this day of Alanna’s arrival.

A silence followed.

“I wanted to thank you—”

“That was all—”

Both of them fell silent. Alanna cleared her throat and started again. “Thank you—Kieran told me about what you did.”

Lady Delia waved a hand, as if it had been nothing. Alanna asked, her mouth moving before her mind could stop it, “Why didn’t you include yourself on the list of people who had the Gift?”

Lady Delia’s lips twisted, Alanna’s eyes immediately drawn to them.

“I haven’t practiced magic since I left Corus,” she said, bitterness in each word. “I’d hoped to never use it again. I’d believed that I’d lost the ability to do it when I wasn’t able to effect anything after returning home. Or maybe I’d just hoped for that and lied to myself.” “

“What happened in Corus?” Alanna said, the words out before she could think about what she was asking.

Lady Delia gave another smile—this one more like a grimace than a smile and suddenly Alanna knew what it had been, even though she’d never suspected it while she’d been there.

“Duke Roger,” Alanna said.

Lady Delia didn’t say anything, her jaw clenched and her eyes slitted.

“You never said anything…” Alanna said, trying to think it through. It wasn’t so inconceivable that Duke Roger could have cast a spell on Lady Delia—he’d cast numerous spells affecting the court that Alanna already knew about.

“What happened?” Alanna asked, the words out before she could think about them.

Lady Delia picked up a small piece of blown glass that had been on the desk. It was a shimmering red and blue bubble, the design of two intertwining colors intricate and mesmerizing, despite its size. “There is a way to subtly supplant a person’s will with another’s,” she said, examining the ball with every appearance of thoughtful concentration. “Where a master of the Gift may slowly overlay their wants and desires upon another until those wants and desires make a slave—where the slave only wants what their master wants. Hungers for what their master hungers for. Desires only to make their master happy. Their master’s every whim is a beautiful and precious gift to be fulfilled. Where a person may stretch the bounds of the brittle shell of self until they cannot identify where they end and their master begins.

“The aftermath of a spell like that leaves little in its wake—just a thin veneer over what was once a full person. A person who has been the pitiable target of a spell like that—what can remain?”

With the same careful deliberation, Lady Delia raised the glass ball towards her, as if to examine it even more closely, and then she slammed it onto the desk, the glass shattering in her hand.

Alanna immediately rushed to Lady Delia and grabbed her hand. The glass had sliced her hand, blood welling up across her palm and Alanna began to remove the glass and set it on the desk, pressing a handkerchief against the small cut and taking care to keep her hand steady as it held Lady Delia’s.

When Alanna looked up, Lady Delia was staring down at her, her face incandescent with rage. She was beautiful, gorgeous, brilliant with it. Neither of them looked away until Alanna licked her lips, suddenly dry, and Lady Delia tracked it.

“I’m sorry,” Alanna said, her voice low. She’d hated Roger with a passion and he’d certainly not liked her, but his attacks against her had been largely impersonal. She’d been an obstacle on his way to the throne. To have had Roger in her mind…taking her thoughts and twisting them to replicate his? “That’s horrible.”

Another moment.

“I don’t want your pity,” Lady Delia said, her voice harsh.

Alanna looked at Lady Delia again. “I don’t pity you.”

The feeling came over Alanna again—the feeling of anticipation, of nervous, of heat and fire in her stomach—but now, only now, could she identify it for what it really was. Lust. Desire. She wanted to kiss Lady Delia. She wanted to push Lady Delia onto the desk and mark her up and make her forget every last memory of Duke Roger. She wanted to cup Lady Delia, feel if she was as hungry for Alanna as Alanna as was for her.

It should have been laughable. The Goddess help her, she wanted Lady Delia badly enough, she thought she might die if she didn’t kiss her right now. They might all die in the morning if the Tusaines overpowered the thin magical protection over Eldorne, so this could be Alanna’s only chance to chase something that she wanted with her whole body.

And so Alanna did what she wanted, she leaned in, telegraphing her intention and giving Lady Delia plenty of opportunity to refuse, but Lady Delia only stayed still, watching, that same glittering anger and intensity in every fiber of her body. Alanna kissed Lady Delia harshly, their lips matched in a fight, mouths opening immediately and Alanna pressing her advantage.

Alanna had a goal—and she’d never been one to let herself fall short, so she pushed Lady Delia back into her chair and then pushed Lady Delia’s skirts up as Alanna went to her knees. Lady Delia was wet and hot, affirming Alanna’s suspicions, and she immediately grabbed Alanna’s hair pulling as she directed Alanna where Delia wanted Alanna to go.

Without even thinking about it, Alanna put a hand in her own breeches, giving herself pleasure as she gave it to Lady Delia. They both rushed headlong into it, Lady Delia moving one of her hands from Alanna’s head to stuff it into her mouth and muffle herself. With a sudden sharp pull on Alanna’s head, Lady Delia let out a tortured sound and then tensed tightly before Alanna felt the clenching and unclenching against her.

Alanna came not a minute later and sat back, breathing hard for a second, Lady Delia’s loud pants above. The complete and utter shock of what Alanna had done set in immediately—clarity coming on the heels of an epically questionable decision. Alanna wasn’t ashamed, per se, but she certainly couldn’t understand what she’d just done. Well, she could, because even completely slumped over her chair, Lady Delia was a study in beauty. But—well, it was good that Faithful would never find out about this because he would never let her live it down.

Alanna stood up—she needed to get out of there before she embarrassed herself further. “I’ll—I’m—I will see you, er, later,” she said and then bolted for the door.

Thankfully, for once, Alanna was able to find her way back to her room without any third-party assistance. She was certain that the moment that someone looked at her, they’d be able to read exactly what she’d come from and all of her horrible, traitorous thoughts about how much she wanted to do it again.

She closed her door and sat on her bed. Immediately, her head started reliving every moment that she’d ever had with Lady Delia. Alanna was the world’s biggest idiot. Maybe she should just spare herself the humiliation and surrender herself to the Tusaines.

Someone knocked on her door—good, maybe there was an emergency that she could help out with—another attempt by Tusaine to turn the water supply bad or someone with a horrible wound—Alanna stood up and made her way to the door at the same time as the door opened to reveal Lady Delia.

“How dare you,” Lady Delia said, her voice low as she pushed Alanna back. “How dare you!” She kept pushing Alanna until the end of the bed tripped her and she fell back against it. Lady Delia climbed on top of Alanna and began removing Alanna’s shirt. She then gripped Alanna’s face with both hands and kissed her, only moving her hands to arrange Alanna’s arms above her head.

“How dare you,” Lady Delia said again and then no one said anything for a long time.

In the morning, Alanna helped Delia dress. When Alanna expressed concern over someone seeing Delia come out of Alanna’s room, Delia raised one perfectly manicured eyebrow. “And?” she asked. “This is still my castle. I will not be ashamed of anything that I do in it.”

And that was apparently that.

Alanna worked with her Gifted class that morning. Once people had seen the type of exercises that she was doing, a few more people had come out of the woodwork. Older people mostly, who’d probably gone their whole lives doing magic but hiding it, afraid of what it would lead to.

None of the people, save Kieran or Arla, had Kara or Kourrem’s ability, but they were all willing to learn, and she spent the morning honing them on the defensive protective spell that she’d initially set up. Any help to maintain the defensive spell that Alanna had wrought over the castle was help that Alanna would take.

In the afternoon, she went and took a turn on the wall before heading down to the captain’s office. Captain Isanza sat at the desk and was writing something when she knocked and entered. He gestured her in.

“Are they getting closer?” she asked.

Captain Isanza sighed and rubbed his forehead. “Yes. And we’ve spotted some trenches and towers that they’re starting to build.”

“They’re not just going to try and wait us out,” Alanna said.

“No,” Captain Isanza said. Alanna thought it through. The Tusaines had to know, as well as Alanna did, how quickly Tortall could muster an army. Tortall’s army was good—good enough to have defeated the Tusaines in the last skirmish. It made sense that they would look to capitalize on their advantage while they could. Before this turned into months of warfare.

“You will look to undertake sorties?” Alanna asked.

Captain Isanza made a considering noise and beckoned Alanna over to his desk. Spread across it was a detailed map of Eldorne and the plain where the army now sat. “I have yet to discuss with Lady Delia, but I will propose three groups to go out tonight and sabotage the army. To create maximum havoc with the lightest casualties. We cannot really afford to undertake any offensive action. And we are not likely to get away with sabotage more than once. So, we will need to try and effect our sabotage as thoroughly as we can, while also keeping the majority of our force safe.”

Alanna knew as well as Captain Isanza that they would need every last soldier if the Tusaines did attempt to break into the city.

“I’d like to be in one of the groups,” Alanna said.

Must you always borrow trouble? Faithful asked. Alanna ignored him.

“Are you sure that’s wise, Sir Knight?”

“I’m a knight,” Alanna said. “I may not be your best fighter, but I’m one of the best that you’ve got.”

Captain Isanza sighed. “I wasn’t doubting your fighting ability—anyone with eyes watching you train in the mornings can see just how gifted you are with or without a sword—but I’m not ignorant of your Gift either and it seems foolhardy to risk it.”

Alanna knew that the captain was right but this, this was the reason that she hadn’t wanted to learn magic as a girl. (Well, that and a crippling fear of her Gift.) She’d trained harder and longer than anyone else to be a knight, not a healer or a sorcerer.

Alanna bit back a curse and kept her gaze fixed on Captain Isanza. Eventually, he shrugged. “I won’t tell you not to go,” he said. “You’d better hang around here while we discuss possible plans for the attack.”

Alanna spent the day preparing with one of the groups that she’d been assigned to, meeting the fifteen other men who ranged from craggy, mountain-like men who dwarfed her to a lithe man who Alanna found herself next to while they ate quickly in the barracks mess. “Bain,” he said eventually, shooting a quick grin at her. “Honored to be serving with you, my lady,” he said.

Alanna felt her cheeks blush a deep red. “I’m not a lady,” Alanna said grouchily, ignoring the fact that she was, in fact, technically, a lady.

“That’s not the way I hear it,’ Bain said, smiling a little more broadly. “I have it on very good authority, that you are a lady knight.”

You’re certainly both of those, Faithful said and when Alanna shot him a look, he was very innocently washing himself. She rolled her eyes.

Their leader, a man named Lukin, was a twenty-something veteran of the King’s Army who’d left it to return home to Eldorne. He reminded Alanna of Coram and it heartened her to see him as he gave the group instructions.

They’d leave close to midnight, when they’d expect that the largest portion of the Tusaine army would be sleeping. The mission of Alanna’s group would be strictly distraction—they would look to set fires to parts of the war camp, creating a diversion, to allow the two other groups to try and disrupt the ditches and towers that the Tusaines had begun building.

Alanna looked at her hands, laughing a bit as she received her instructions. Lukin had looked very matter-of-fact when he’d asked her about her ability to set fires magically and Alanna appreciated his demeanor, even if she’d have been preferring getting to use her skills in combat. “Even when I’m a knight, I still have to be a sorcerer,” she whispered to Faithful.

Their mission went well—Alanna returned exhilarated after an evening well spent setting fires to tents, including a food supply tent, and evading guards. They’d had no casualties, other than Bain who had managed a burn to his arm, which Kieran had taken him away to treat.

When she slipped into her room, Delia was waiting for her, sitting in one of the chairs by the window as she read a book. The candle next to her showed that she’d likely been there for some time.

Alanna felt flustered, but pleased all the same. “Checking in on your patient?” she asked, as Faithful made himself scarce. He’d been baffled by Alanna’s choice, and certainly judgmental, although he hadn’t yet said it was a poor idea.

“Making sure that she hasn’t undone all my good work,” Delia said, closing the book and standing up. “Perhaps I should come investigate more closely.”

“I think that, really, a thorough examination is necessary,” Alanna said, as seriously as she could.

Delia came forward and each step closer made Alanna’s heart beat faster. When she stood a few inches away, Delia reached a hand forward and rubbed her thumb against Alanna’s cheekbone. Alanna swallowed at the touch. After a second, Delia pulled it away and examined her thumb, raising an eyebrow at the dark mark of some ash that she’d found there.

She then brought both of her hands down the sides of Alanna’s neck, the pressure firm but not painful, as if feeling for injuries. She continued down Alanna’s side and then felt alongside her spine, Alanna’s breath coming in bursts as she tried not to pant. When Delia’s hands pressed against Alanna’s breasts, Alanna’s breath hitched. She saw the first sign that Delia was not as unaffected as her cool demeanor indicated when Delia’s fingertips lingered as she swallowed. When Delia’s hands reached for Alanna’s tunic, Alanna stood as still as she could, anticipation building so high it almost hurt, and then in one graceful movement, Alanna’s tunic was off.

Her shirt and breeches were then off as well and still Delia kept looking at her with that same intense focus. “Yes,” she said. “I see that an even more thorough examination will be required.” She cupped Alanna’s right breast before bringing her mouth to it and Alanna groaned, the sound loud and echoing into the room. She desperately hoped against hope that everyone who had been placed in the rooms adjoining Alanna’s had relocated themselves going forward.

“How did your mission go?” Delia asked, her voice a whisper against Alanna’s shoulder.

“Hm?” Alanna said, brain fuzzy with exhaustion and a glow from coupling. “Oh, well. We will not be able to do much against the Tusaines, but Captain Isanza is right to send out groups to sortie. The Tusaines have already begun building ditches and walls.”

“And battering rams,” Delia said. “They’re both entrenching themselves and preparing to overrun our defenses.”

They were both quiet for some minutes, Delia’s hand tracing some pattern against Alanna’s shoulder. “It was exhilarating,” Alanna said, even more quietly. “To be able to feel that I am doing something. I know that my work here with the others who have the Gift is more important—”

“But you want to be a knight,” Delia said simply. “You have always wanted to be a knight. I’ve always envied you that certainty. If there was something that I wanted to be, I’ve forgotten it. For a while, I wanted to be Prince Jonathan’s wife and Queen of Tortall—and maybe some part of it was true. No—some part of it was true. In the beginning. But that was because it seemed that there was security and power in being the wife of the most powerful man in the country. And Jon has some not insignificant charms…”

“He certainly does,” Alanna said and then surprised herself by giggling. Delia giggled as well until it turned into a full body laugh and she buried her face in Alanna’s shoulder.

“Let’s not discuss Jon,” she said, her voice muffled but the laughs still sneaking out.

“A good idea,” Alanna said and then burst into another peal of laughter.

When they both finally settled, the hints of dawn were beginning to peak through the window.

“Outside of Jon?” Alanna asked.

Delia smiled. “I’m not sure what I want. I could probably still get married, but I would never have what I have here. Although this too will change—my brother will ultimately inherit Eldorne and he will marry and his wife will come to take over the things that I have managed for these past few years.”

Alanna did understand. She thought of the life that she might have had in Trebond—unmarried, running her father’s lands in his mental absence and then once Thom inherited.

She squeezed Delia’s hand and Delia smiled at her.

“I was thinking of holding a small celebration of thanks,” Delia said. “For the successes of the missions this night. I was going to commission the blacksmith to make small medals for the participants and award them tomorrow night during the evening meal.”

Alanna didn’t love the idea of public adulation, but even she could see that it would be good for the spirits of the people of Eldorne. They would see that their guards were being brave against the enemy and they’d see Delia, confident and assured of herself giving them an award. They would certainly take heart from it.”

“I think that’s a great idea,” Alanna said slowly. 

“Excellent,” Delia said. And then Alanna’s eyes grew heavy enough that if Delia said anything else, Alanna didn’t hear it before she was asleep.

She woke briefly, still in the half-light of dawn, when the bed shifted, and then she fully woke when the sun was high up in the sky, Delia gone and the other side of the bed cold.

Alanna tried not to feel disappointed.

The next night, true to Delia’s word, she announced that she would be recognizing the great bravery of the men and woman who had gone forth to triumph against the Tusaines. Delia must have received the list of the men who had participated in the sally from Captain Isanza, because she read from a list, her gaze serious and proud as each man came forward to bend his head to let Delia lay the medal strung on a chain around his neck.

Alanna’s name was read last of all and she steeled herself, walking from her table to where Delia stood on a small raised dais. “And our knight, Sir Alanna,” Delia said, her eyes connecting with Alanna’s. Alanna felt a shiver run through her as she inclined her head. The chain was warm against Alanna’s skin, perhaps from where Delia had been holding it, but it still made another shiver run down Alanna’s back.

Delia’s fingers brushed against the back of Alanna’s neck and Alanna wanted to pull Delia close, the hint of a touch already prompting Alanna back to the previous nights. Would Delia come to Alanna’s room tonight? Could Alanna go to Delia’s rooms?

Alanna forced herself into the moment where Delia had finished setting the necklace in place and Alanna then stepped back. It sat over her tunic, but she could feel where it would rest next to her ember stone once she tucked it under her tunic and shirt.

“My lady, I thank you,” Alanna said and then made her way quickly back to her table. Delia had arranged for musicians to play and a violinist and flutist took to the dais and began to play some quick, vivid melodies that soon got people smiling and clapping.

Delia made her way amongst the tables, stopping and murmuring some quiet words to people here and there as she wound her way through the hall until she arrived back at Alanna’s table. She nodded to the captain and a few of the lieutenants eating with Alanna and then took the seat next to Alanna.

“Nicely done,” Alanna said, her voice low.

Delia flashed Alanna a quick smile and then moved over until her legs were just barely touching Alanna’s. It was a gross breach of propriety, but everyone’s eyes were on the musicians and so Alanna drew warmth from Delia, just as Delia drew it from Alanna.

Two mornings after, Alanna woke in the middle of the night, a sudden pain at her head. She sat up, barely hearing Delia’s words, as she gritted out: “They’re attacking again.”

Delia nodded, her face serious. She gripped Alanna’s hand once and then she was up, a robe over her shift and she fell away from Alanna’s vision.

Alanna began chanting, her being focused on her protective netting. But a short time later, she felt Kieran’s magic join with hers and then the rest of her class’s join in soon after. A dark green magic joined in with Alanna’s and it felt familiar and warm, curling up and buffeting Alanna.

Some nebulous amount of time later, Alanna felt the attack subside, and she grasped the ember necklace and watched as a dark copper magic began to dissipate from just beyond the Eldorne walls.

Faithful was curled up in Alanna’s lap, a warm presence along her legs and Alanna stroked him gratefully. “Better than two days out?” she asked.

Much better, Faithful agreed. He began washing himself as Alanna laughed.

“Did I miss anything?” she asked. “And my students did surprisingly well.” It was almost an afterthought, but had been the likely reason that Alanna was here and awake rather than awaiting Delia or Kieran’s assistance again.

Faithful paused, then gave a long lick of his leg, and then paused again. That was probably Delia’s doing, he said, sounding less disgruntled than Alanna would have expected.

“Oh, really?”

Yes, she left after you started chanting to go find the healer.

She’d also—she’d also helped Alanna by using her magic. Something clenched and then bloomed inside of Alanna’s chest—a bit of warmth and a bit of pride. Of course, Delia had known what Alanna needed her to have done. And she’d done it.

But she hadn’t just helped Alanna by getting the rest of her Gifted students. Despite the fact that Delia had said that she didn’t want to use her Gift again, she’d now used it twice. Twice to help Alanna.

The blooming flower in Alanna’s chest grew and grew until it seemed to extend from the tips of her toes to the tips of her fingers.

When Alanna brought it up later that night, Delia shrugged it off, but Alanna carefully cupped Delia’s face and turned it so she looked at Alanna. “Thank you,” Alanna said. “I know how painful magic is for you. I see what you did. And I thank you for it.”

Delia’s cheeks reddened but she didn’t look away. “It wasn’t just for you,” she said. “If you hadn’t been able to hold the spell, we would all have been affected.”

Alanna grinned and then stole a kiss that quickly deepened.

Alanna took a turn on the castle walls a week later—normally she would take dinner in the great hall with Delia and then retire to either hers or Delia’s rooms, although lately, they’d been sleeping in Delia’s rooms as they were larger and Faithful claimed that he liked the warmth better. It was odd to first think that Alanna had found some new version of normal in the middle of a siege, although she’d long since come to understand that even the strangest circumstances became normal in the midst of war after enough repetition. It was odder still to think that Delia had become a part of Alanna’s usual routines. Odd, but not an unhappy part of her routines.

Something twinged at the corner of Alanna’s protective netting. Alanna stilled immediately, looking around for Bain or Aiden who were also taking their nightly rotation on the wall. Bain caught her eye and turned to get for help, but Alanna stilled him. Something about the magic probing the netting felt familiar.

She grabbed her ember and the magic wasn’t coming from the Tusaine camp—it was coming from across the river. And it was sapphire blue.

Jon?

Jon!

Alanna made an excuse to Bain and Aiden and then made her way down from the wall and into the castle. She headed straight for Delia’s rooms, unsurprised to see light coming from underneath the door. She knocked once and then waited.

The door was promptly opened by Brenna who nodded once to Alanna, unsurprised to see her there. Delia looked up where she was writing something at her desk and her face softened when she saw Alanna, a smile lighting up her face.

Brenna nodded again to Alanna and then said to Delia, “I’ll go speak now with the livestock marshal—he’ll want to start making preparations. And I’ll let the chamberlain know to modify the rooms.”

She bowed to Delia and then was out of the door.

“Preparations for what?” Alanna asked, distracted by what she’d interrupted.

“It seems that two of the cows will be calving soon—we’ve decided to keep them for the moment,” Delia said and then her face changed as she caught something in Alanna’s expression. “But you certainly have something more interesting that mild disputes about the politics of room assignments and livestock arrangements.”

“Jon—I think Jon’s here,” Alanna said and was rewarded by the way that Delia’s eyes went wide and her whole body went still. “I think that they must be across the river. The Tusaines are between Jon and whatever forces he’s brought and us.”

“But they’re here.”

Alanna nodded and Delia thoughtfully sat back in her chair. “I think that Tortall’s forces are here significantly earlier than the Tusaines could have expected. Which means that they will need to attack…if they can force us to surrender, then they will be able to bargain with Prince Jon.”

Alanna nodded. She’d hoped to give Delia a small bit of unbridled joy before the other shoe fell, but Delia, as always, was racing ahead.

“We need to come up with a way to let Jon know what our capabilities are,” Delia said. She looked questioningly at Alanna. Alanna nodded back.

“I think that I know a way,” she said.

Alanna dropped through a chute and found herself in the middle of an incredibly cold river. Gritting her teeth, she swam through it until she reached the opposite shore. She quickly made her way up the banks until she got through to the forest and then, once she was safely hidden within the cover of the forest, she stopped long enough to use magic to warm herself up and dry off.

Alanna desperately wanted to light a fire and let herself soak up the warmth for a few minutes, but she couldn’t risk it, so she kept moving, heading in the direction that she felt like Tortall’s forces were likely to be placed. She moved carefully, as Jon would almost certainly have posted sentries and there would be a watch in place. Alanna would prefer that she not end up facing the business end of a sword.

When she’d made it a mile or so down the river, she heard someone gruffly say, “I wouldn’t move any further,” and felt the press of a sword against her back. Alanna stopped suddenly and both of her hands were pulled forcefully behind her back before she was turned to face a man of middle years, ropey but still muscled.

She quickly looked down and saw the blue and silver of Tortall on his tunic and heaved a deep sigh of relief. Still, she didn’t say anything as he manhandled her further into the forest.

They’d been walking for five minutes before the man led her to a small squad of men who all eyed her with curiosity. A short man maybe ten years’ Alanna’s senior seemed to be the leader and he looked her over before gesturing back behind him. “Take ‘im back to camp, see what they want to do.”

Soon enough, she was thrust into a massive camp, buried in the forest, Tortall colors everywhere—there were hundreds and hundreds of men that she could see and Alanna felt a swoop of gratitude so deep, her throat began to feel tight.

Now seemed as good of a time as any, so Alanna cleared her throat and said to her captor. “You’re probably going to want to bring me to Prince Jon directly,” she said.

The man squinted at her. “Or Sir Gary,” Alanna tried. “Sir Raoul?”

“I have my orders,” the man said, so Alanna let the man cart her off to another lieutenant that Alanna didn’t know, but she figured he would probably get the idea when she said,

“I’m Sir Alanna,” and was gratified by the completely blank look of shock on both the lieutenant’s face and her captor’s.

There was a bit of panic on their part after that as she was shown into a tent and left there with a different man—still bound, although that was reasonable until someone could verify that she was who she was saying that she was—but soon enough Raoul was walking into the tent and his face split into a wide grin when he saw her. “Mother, you’ve surprised us!” Raoul said, laughing again. “I couldn’t believe my ears—Coram said that you were at Eldorne castle, how did you get out?”

“Coram is here?” Alanna asked.

“Of course,” Raoul said. “I sent off my squire to find him, I’m sure he’ll be here any minute.”

And sure enough, Coram, Gary and Jon all showed up in short order while Alanna was busy telling Raoul what had happened since she’d sent Coram off to give warning of the Tusaines’ arrival.

They all gave her big hearty hugs, squeezing all of the breath out of her—even Coram, who also thumped her on the back and glared at her, as if it had been Alanna’s fault that the Tusaines had attacked in the first place!

Alanna hadn’t seen Jon since their ignominious argument where she had laid to rest any romantic expectations that Jon might have. There was a moment of awkwardness before Jon pulled her into another hug.

“I’m glad you’re safe,” he said, when they pulled apart.

“I’m glad you’re here,” Alanna said.

Coram wrapped Alanna into an all-encompassing hug and then cuffed her gruffly on the shoulder. “Good to see you.”

They all went back to Jon’s tent where he filled Alanna in on what had happened—with Raoul and Gary’s enthusiastic commentary.

“We’re going to attack tomorrow,” Jon said when someone finally pointed out that the night was quickly passing. “We must—or we’ll lose the advantage of surprise. They won’t be expecting us for another week and so we’ll try to use that to our full advantage.”

“They’re getting ready to start attacking the castle as well,” Alanna said. “They’ve mostly been trying to wait us out—we now only have a month’s worth of food for the castle. I’m very glad that you’ve showed up when you did. Something may have told them that they didn’t have that long, so they may be more prepared than you expect. Or they are just very prepared. We’ve seen them lay out defensive fortifications. And here’s a list of what we saw when the Eldorne forces did some scouting work during our one sally against them.” Alanna took out a waxcloth bag from under her tunic which held Captain Isanza’s report on the Tusaines.

Jon looked thoughtful as he took the bag and started leafing through the papers.

Alanna couldn’t stay long—she needed to attempt the river crossing while it was still dark and the Tusaines wouldn’t be able to see her.

Before she went, Jon tried to teach her how to use a fire spell to communicate with him. “We’ll have to both be at our fires at the same time, but just in case,” he said. “I’ll try to be at mine every night around eight pm, although I certainly can’t guarantee it.” He gave Alanna another long look. “I’ve missed you.” Whatever Alanna was going to say was forestalled by Jon holding up a hand. “Not like that. I’ve missed Alanna, my friend.”

Alanna felt her face grow warm. “I’ve missed Jon, my friend, as well,” she said. “And once Tortall clears a path so that I know that Eldorne can be safe, I can’t wait to fight for you again.”

Jon laughed, “Always more spirit than sense,” he said. “Say hi to Faithful for me.”

Alanna made the horribly cold river crossing just before the sky began its slow transition from inky black to gray and managed to make her way back to the now-closed chute. She called up, shivering, every bone in her body exhausted and cold, as a rope dropped. Alanna managed to cling to it and she was slowly hauled up.

Captain Isanza was there within a few moments, Alanna wrapped in a warm blanket and Kieran there to mutter a warming spell while she filled him in on what Jon had told her. Three masons had already begun laying in stone and bricking up the chute as soon as she was out.

She barely had time to get it all out before she began yawning, her jaw cracking at each successive one.

“Go to bed,” Captain Isanza said gruffly. “You did well.”

Alanna thought about going to her room, but she was too tired and wanted to see Delia, so she let herself into Delia’s rooms and stripped down, leaving all of her wet clothing laid over a chair to manage in the morning. She didn’t even attempt to find a shift to sleep in, heading straight for the bed and trying to be quiet as she climbed in.

Delia stirred once Alanna had burrowed under the covers, Delia’s warmth feeling so good against her skin.

Delia’s eyes blinked open slowly in the dim light of dawn.

“You’re cold,” Delia said. She lay her hand against Alanna’s face and the warmth of her hand felt good, so Alanna pressed her face into it. “Come here,” she said and Alanna let herself be pulled into Delia’s arms. Normally, she would have found sleeping like that suffocating, but Delia smelled so good and Alanna desperately wanted more of Delia’s warmth.

“Mmm, no clothes,” Delia said, her eyes closed again, and Alanna huffed out an exhausted laugh and then fell asleep.

The next day, Tortall attacked—according to Bain, they had emerged just before dawn several miles down the river to assault the Tusaines’ position. The Tusaines had opted to fight on two fronts—defending against Jon’s army and attempting to gain entry to Eldorne.

Delia filled Alanna in on this when she woke at midday. “I’ve got to get to the wall,” Alanna said, examining her still wet and bedraggled clothing.

Delia held up a new tunic, shirt and breeches. “I had my maid bring over some clothes for you,” she said and Alanna smiled and then leaned in for a quick kiss in between putting on her undergarments.

Delia froze, watching Alanna wide-eyed. After a moment, she seemed to pull herself together. “How did Tortall look?” she asked.

“They managed to bring an impressive number of men on such a short notice,” Alanna said.

“However…” Delia said, reading Alanna’s mind.

“However, the Tusaines still outnumber Tortall. Probably three thousand men against five thousand men. And the Tusaines are good fighters, for all that they fought dirty the last time that we fought against them.”

“So, you’re telling me that it’s not certain,” Delia said.

“It’s not certain, although I think that Jon is a brilliant tactician. And he’s not afraid to fight himself. He’s got experience—albeit unintentionally from the Drell River campaign—but he’s willing to be aggressive and take risks. Oh, he won’t outright go against his father, but he’ll find a way to do what he wants.”

“You know Jon well,” Delia said. “Still.” She sounded a bit sad.

“He’s one of my best friends,” Alanna said, surprising herself by how much she meant it. And that was nice to realize—in the immediate aftermath of Alanna refusing to marry Jon, she had felt the double loss of a lover and a friend. Seeing him had let her realize that they were still friends.

“I always envied that, you know,” Delia said.

“Our friendship?” Alanna asked.

“Yes, even when I thought that you were Squire Alan, you seemed like someone who would make an excellent friend. Very loyal.”

There was a lot that Alanna could say to that and she thought through her response. “I’m glad that I was and am still friends with Jon,” Alanna said. “I’m also glad that we’re friends now. You and me. We are friends?”

Delia’s lips quirked up and the solemnity of the moment before was cast aside. “We did make good on that goal—to convince someone, somewhere that we were friends.”

Alanna laughed at that and then reluctantly looked towards the door. “I should go,” Alanna said and forced herself to finish dressing. Delia waited until Alanna was almost done and then reached out for Alanna’s hands, squeezing them tight once before letting go.

“Good luck to you, sir knight,” Delia said.

“Good luck to you, my lady,” Alanna said, feeling something odd and stilted settle into her throat. And then Delia was gone and Alanna left to put on her boots alone, surrounded by a room smelling and looking of Delia.

The sounds of war were loud—Alanna always seemed to forget that. The yells of men—defending, attacking, instructions that could barely be heard. Trumpets blaring. Things breaking and falling. It could be deafening if one paid too much attention to it.

Alanna focused on what was in front of her. She couldn’t pay any attention to how Jon’s army was doing because the Eldorne forces were entirely focused on repelling the Tusaines—the wall itself shook from the attempt of battering rams at the two main gates, but so far, the doors to walled city held. The defenders stationed over the door had been pouring hot wax and pitch down as the archers shot at the attackers, to some success, but the Tusaines had the numbers to keep attacking.

Alanna had been stationed at one of the eastern parts of the wall—it was one of the lowest parts of the wall and the Tusaines had built a make-shift bridge and tower and had spent the better part of the day attempting to climb up it and gain access to Eldorne. So far, Alanna’s forces had managed to prevent any attackers from making it onto the wall by a combination of archers, boiling material and hacking at anything that approached close enough to touch.

Alanna’s students had become an integral part of the defense. Jemma, one of the castle’s undermaids, and Bryan, one of the ostlers, had used their magic to keep the pitch and wax mixtures hot, and Alanna had, again, felt that fierce, quiet pride at seeing them in action.

As for Alanna, she’d gone between fighting on the wall to overlooking her students near her and then to Captain Isanza, wherever he happened to be, to discuss what she was seeing.

The next few days were spent doing anything and everything needed to fight off the Tusaines. As fast as the Tusaines appeared to put up siege towers, the Eldorne defenders continued to fight off the Tusaines before they could leverage the towers and overrun the wall.

Once the battering ram at the north gate almost broke through the door, but the guardsmen at the gate were able to fend off the Tusaines and archers were able to pick off the remaining attackers until the Tusaines retreated from the bridge.

Time ebbed and flowed in the way of battle—exhaustion creeping in at the corners of Alanna’s vision at the end of her shifts and then disappearing entirely in the moments where the Tusaine men were close enough that Alanna could see freckles and scars on their faces.

Alanna was relieved from her shift, she’d lost count of which one, in the dark of the evening. She headed to her room for a fresh change of clothes where, when she saw it was reasonably close to 8, she tried to call Jon in her fire. She got no response, so she sat there for a few minutes, entertaining a cursory debate with herself and an accusatory look from Faithful before she headed to Delia’s room.

Delia was writing at her desk, but smiled when Alanna came in. “How is my valiant defender?” she asked.

“Exhausted,” Alanna said and then came around Delia’s desk. “Do you mind?” she asked.

Delia shook her head. “In fact, I would love your opinion,” she said.

Alanna tried not to look as surprised as she felt. “My opinion?”

“Yes,” Delia said. “You’re not unaware of our looming problem with respect to food. As of today, we are all on one-third rations. But, by my math, we will not be able to sustain ourselves after ten more days. Fourteen at the most. I will have to surrender the city, to surrender Eldorne to the Tusaines.”

Alanna sat down on the edge of Delia’s chest. She let out a deep sigh. “I told Jon about our stores. I’ll try to get ahold of him with the fire spell.”

She couldn’t promise that Tortall would make it in time, no matter how much she wanted to promise that. Delia looked at Alanna and Delia knew, she knew what Alanna knew. One side of her lip crept up in a half-smile.

“Come to bed,” Delia said and they both put aside their problems for a few hours to rest.  

Alanna was acutely aware of Delia’s deadline, the grim determination of the guardsmen and the dwindling food supplies. Each night, Delia, Alanna and Captain Isanza spoke and there seemed to be little that anyone could do except hope. When Alanna and Jon were able to reach each other, Jon passed on what information he could and Alanna tried to take hope from the small advances, the incremental progress.

And then! Early in the morning after Alanna had eaten what little oatmeal that she could in the barracks before she was due on the wall, she heard a cheer come up from the wall.

She hurried towards the wall, her heart in her throat at what she would find—but, when she got to the top of the wall, she saw something even more unexpected than she had anticipated. The Tusaines had pulled back across the bridge and were fighting with the Tortallan army just across the moat.

Someone sounded a horn and the Tusaines began to retreat as Tortall overran their outer layer of ditches. The Tusaines retreated to the next layer of ditches. But it was enough, Tortall had made it over the river and finally pushed the Tusaines!

Alanna saw Delia at the mid-day meal and when Delia saw her, she immediately excused herself from her conversation and came over to Alanna. For a moment, she just gripped Alanna’s hands and then she relaxed, her whole demeaner as calm and confident as she always was.

“I know,” Alanna said in a whisper and Delia squeezed Alanna’s hands again.

The next day, Jon was able to get food to the castle—entire wagons of grain, rice, potatoes, peas, carrots and even chicken. Delia was there in the courtyard when the guards opened the doors to let in the supplies and her eyes met Alanna’s. Something crossed across them, shock—disbelief—exuberance—a gift that Delia hadn’t expected to get, but the next moment, she looked towards the soldiers and smiled confidently, as if she had been assured that this would always have happened.

“Our King and Prince are quite generous,” Delia said, smiling widely and the soldiers broke out laughing in agreement.

The celebratory mood extended that night and Delia and Alanna excused themselves from the festivities in the great hall to escape to Delia’s rooms.

Delia went down on Alanna, torturing her with teasing licks and scraping the edges of her teeth over Alanna’s thighs and folds until Alanna was begging Delia for more. By the time that Delia began to use her fingers, Alanna felt scrapped wide open, her voice hoarse and something large and painful was stuck in her chest, cracking the center of Alanna’s very being.

When Alanna came, the clenching and unclenching of muscles seeming to go on, urged by Delia’s touches, her whole body went languid against the bed and she lay there, blissed out, for a while. When her brain finally began to function, she made a motion towards Delia, who had curled up around Alanna, but Delia just drew Alanna closer and kissed her.

“What about—?” Alanna asked.

Delia looked like the cat who had gotten its cream, self-satisfied and smug. “But still,” Alanna protested. She wanted to sink into Delia, let the smell and feel of Delia rise around her. “Tomorrow,” Delia said. “You need your sleep.”

Alanna kissed Delia back and then burrowed her face into Delia’s neck, letting Delia keep Alanna warm as she fell into dreamless sleep.

The Eldorne forces, Alanna included in that number, watched eagerly each day as Jon’s forces pushed back the Tusaine army a bit more day by day.

A little over a week later, Jon rode up to the castle, flanked by an impressive number of men. He looked battle weary and yet, regal. No circlet on his head, but he sat proudly and wore the crest of Conté on his shield, the silver sword and crown shining in the sun.

He dismounted in the front courtyard and Alanna and Delia were there waiting for him.

“Sir Alanna, Lady Delia,” Jon said, once he’d been announced formally, “is there somewhere that we can go and speak, perhaps with the captain of your guard?”

Alanna threw Delia a look. Delia returned a quick side glance at Alanna and then fixed her attention on Jon. “Welcome, Prince Jon,” Delia said. “Eldorne is in your debt.

The four of them went into one of Delia’s formal receiving rooms and they were quickly served with refreshments.

“We’ve pushed them back to the edge of the Eviana Forest,” Jon said. “We suspect that they don’t have enough supplies to be able to retreat through the Tusaine Mountains. I have sent an offer of their surrender via a representative and we are awaiting word on the Tusaines’ response.”

Delia looked over at Alanna. “Does that mean that it’s over?”

“Almost,” Jon said. “In all but name, yes. We have also taken a number of hostages—perhaps the name Jem means something to you, Sir Alanna?”

He looked over at Alanna who had started laughing. “Don’t tell me they tried to pull the same trick twice?” she said.

“Thankfully, no,” Jon said. “But we caught him when we split the Tusaine army and forced a surrender of a third of their forces.”

Jon and Delia made pleasant conversation despite their less than pleasant past and Alanna watched them both, something growing in her chest. There was a hint of jealousy, but it was something more than that. It was something fierce and almost painful in its intensity, making Alanna think of that night after Tortall had first managed to breach Tusaine’s defenses when she’d lain with Delia.

Soon, this war would be over—or at least this battle—and there would be no need for Alanna to stay here. Delia could come back to court—she and Jon could patch things up if they wanted—Delia would be the brave hero holding Eldorne against a sieging army, and Jon would also come out looking good as the hero leading the rescuing forces. A story to read at night to the children if Delia and Jon wed.

But something in Alanna protested that Delia couldn’t want that. Deep inside of Alanna, she ached at the thought of Delia finding love with Jon. Ached with the thought of Delia finding love with anyone.

Alanna felt something even tighter and more painful twist as she understood what she was feeling.

That night, as Delia lay across, her head turned towards Alanna, Delia asked “What are you going to do when the battle of Eldorne is over?”

Alanna had been asking herself that same question. “I don’t know yet,” she said slowly. “I could go with Jon’s army.”

Alanna was silent for a minute, thinking back to the meeting with Jon that day. “I’ve liked being here. I’ve liked being here with you. But I’ll have to leave at some point. I have obligations to Myles and Olau. And back at court.”

Alanna thought about asking Delia what she would do when the battle was over, but wasn’t sure she wanted to hear the answer. Don’t ask questions that have answers you won’t like, she told herself.

When the silence had gone on for longer than it should have, Delia squeezed Alanna’s hand and then leaned in to kiss her. When they broke apart, they were both panting and Delia took the opportunity to kiss her way down Alanna’s body. When Alanna was done, after she caught her breath, she reached for Delia and brought her quickly to a climax, Delia’s body going languid and relaxed in the aftermath.

Alanna thought over what she wanted and reminded herself that she’d gotten where she was by being brave and facing the things that scared her.

“Come with me,” Alanna said quietly.

Delia made a questioning noise.

“When this is done,” Alanna said. “Assuming we survive. Which feels more likely by the day. When this ends, I’ve promised Myles that I would meet him in Olau. It’s not as large as Eldorne, but it’s a beautiful place. I think that you might like it.

Delia closed her eyes and Alanna’s stomach plummeted. “I want to say yes,” she said. “But the fief of Eldorne will need so much rebuilding when this is done. My father and brother will need help—they need help in managing this estate.”

“Of course,” Alanna said, her voice a whisper. “Of course.”

Alanna wanted to slip away to her room, where she could be alone with the hidden bleeding wound in her chest where she’d hoped despite logic that Delia would have agreed to leave her whole life behind for Alanna. Or, more accurately, she wanted to want to slip away to her room. She would have, at most a week or two, with Delia before Alanna would no longer have an excuse to stay.

Alanna should leave—and yet, she knew that whatever was left between herself and Delia, Alanna would stay until the end.

She fell asleep curled up around Delia.

One week later, the Tusaines formally surrendered, Duke Hilam riding out to administer the articles of surrender personally. Their surrender coincided with Duke Kenelm of Eldorne’s and his son, Lord Paxton’s, return from the south. It was an odd transition, Delia stepping out of the role that she’d held confidently and well in managing the castle and its many inhabitants. If there’d been words of praise for Delia’s actions from Duke Kenelm, he saved them for a more private time, and based on his attitude and actions, Alanna suspected that he did not share any particular praise for his daughter even in private.

Delia seemed resigned to it. If she was hurt by her father’s actions, she didn’t tell Alanna about it. Alanna tried not to read into Delia’s reactions to her father’s arrival. And what would Alanna be able to say anyways—Delia knew her family better than Alanna. Even if every part of Alanna wanted to urge Delia to leave, Alanna kept her mouth closed firmly and focused on preparing for her own departure.

With the return of Duke Kenelm, Alanna spent several days with Captain Isanza, the Duke and Paxton going through the events of the siege. The captain knew his business and Alanna was hardly needed, but Duke Kenelm, as much as he seemed to find her choice of vocations distasteful, clearly believed that as a peer of the realm and a knight, her voice should be heard. Alanna wanted to scoff at that—the man that Kenelm had hired to captain his guard had done brilliantly and Alanna vibrated between bristling on Captain Isanza’s behalf or her own.

For her last few days, Alanna continued working with her students each day. It helped to keep her days busy—to keep from focusing on the pain in her chest—but she turned over their care to Arla in the morning of her last day at the castle. Alanna’s students came by to say their goodbyes and wish her well.

“We will miss you,” Arla said. “Putting aside everything that you did for Eldorne, you taught us so much.”

Alanna felt herself blush. “I was glad to do it.”

“You have a real talent for it,” Arla said. “Now, I know that you want to go out and slay monsters and villains, but I hope that you remember that because you could do a lot with that skill.”

It was a thought—not one that Alanna felt like she needed to act immediately on. But one day, she might decide to settle down—still take on adventuring from time to time—but she thought about Myles and how much she had loved his class and loved learning from him, even now.

“Thank you, Arla,” Alanna said, giving Arla a hug. “May the gods be with you.”

When Alanna gave her formal farewells to Duke Kenelm and Lord Paxton, she also stopped by Delia’s rooms, although Delia wasn’t in at the time. Alanna stared down at her hand where she’d written a letter—it was almost embarrassing how much Alanna couldn’t bring herself to stop caring, but she and Delia weren’t parting on bad terms. They were headed in different directions—but she’d seen something in Delia that she couldn’t forget.

Do you think that she’ll come? Faithful asked.

“I don’t know,” Alanna said. “I hope so.” She looked down at the sealed letter that held an open invitation for Delia to come to Olau whenever she wanted to. If Alanna was looking at the situation realistically, she would have guessed that it would take years before Delia felt that she could leave Eldorne. Perhaps, as Delia had mentioned, when her brother wed.

But even if that was two or five years down the line, Alanna would still want Delia to come. Maybe Alanna would feel ready to settle down then, although she tried not to conjure up visions of Delia and Alanna settling in at Olau together.

“I just need to give this to her and then we can leave,” Alanna told Faithful. Faithful gave her a skeptical look. “It will be soon.”

She spent an hour trying to find Delia before she gave up and left the letter with Delia’s secretary, Alanna’s heart feeling somewhat bruised and battered.

Alanna went to the stables and left a very nice amount of coin with the ostler who’d cared for Moonlight during her stay there. From there, she packed what little she had brought onto Moonlight and then headed for the north gate.

Maybe she would go to Jon and travel with the army for a while. Or maybe go north?

At the gate, Delia was waiting. Her face was serious, her hair pulled back tightly into a bun, and she wore a plain, dark blue gown.

“Delia,” Alanna said, and then stopped, all words forgotten.

“Alanna,” Delia breathed out. “I’ve been trying to find you all morning.”

“I left a letter with your secretary,” Alanna said, feeling suddenly shy.

Delia shook her head. “I haven’t been back to my rooms today. I was scared you would leave.”

“I’m glad I got to see you,” Alanna said.

“Alanna, ask me again,” Delia said suddenly.

Alanna immediately knew what Delia was referring to and her whole body went cold. Delia had once been famed for her petty cruelties. But she wasn’t that person anymore. She couldn’t be that cruel, right?

Alanna’s heart clenched painfully, but Alanna thought of how Delia had curled up behind Alanna three mornings prior, nuzzling the back of her neck, before she’d fallen back asleep.

“You want me to ask you again?”

Delia nodded.

“Will you come with me to Olau?” Alanna asked.

“Yes,” Delia said. “I will pack up almost all of my worldly possessions and come with you to Olau.”

“What?” Alanna said dumbly. “You can’t mean that.”

“I certainly can,” Delia said, looking smug. “I already ordered Milenna to start packing my rooms up. My father and brother will be more than capable of managing without me. I feel that it is in poor taste to say that the happiest I’ve been lately is while my castle was being sieged and we were all on the verge of starvation, but it’s true.”

“It won’t all be sieges and rationing,” Alanna said.

“I hope not,” Delia said. “In fact, I hope it’s never again sieges and rationing. But even if it was, there’s no one else I would rather be with.”

Faithful made a noise and Delia looked over and said, “Even with that dreadful cat,” in a fond tone of voice.

“Really?” Alanna said and she reached forward and gripped Delia’s hands.

“Really,” Delia said and gripped Alanna’s hands back.

They set off together, headed towards Olau, Alanna’s heart light.