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As the seasons changed, so did the colours of the leaves on the trees. As the leaves started to fall from the branches they once clung on to, the lingering feeling of sorrow only continued to infest Simon’s mind. The physical changes of nature? Simon could brush it off with some extra training or late nights in his office to distract his mind. But once the temperatures dropped and soldiers around base started to bundle up in their winter coats, Simon could only ignore the festivities for so long.
Fall had finally met its end and a new beginning “bloomed” with winter’s frost. So as icy flakes began to fall from the skies above, holiday spirit only continue to rise.
While time went on, holiday spirit had quickly spread around base like disease that couldn’t be stopped. And he wasn’t surprised when many soldiers stopped going outside to even train due to the bitter cold that awaited. So with most of his comrades stuck inside, it left little options of productivity around base. Outdoor training was reduce and so was paper work since barley any missions were active at this point. Which only really left Christmas spirit to keep soldiers busy around base.
The base had filled with Christmas cheer from small decorations, to gifts and hot chocolate, and hell — even the mess hall changed up their meals a bit to match the upcoming holiday. The Christmas cheer had turned the base into a magical place, yet instead of that magic giving Simon a warm fuzzy feeling like it did for everyone else. It only left Simon feeling sick to his stomach.
For Simon, Christmas wasn’t magical - or at least it wasn’t anymore. Christmas was no longer a reminder of cozy weather, warm meals, and making memories with loved ones. Now, it was only a grim reminder of all that he had lost. It taunted him, reminding Simon of all the painful memories throughout the day and lasting till nightfall. Even though he felt disdian for Christmas, he wished deep down that the holiday would come sooner so this mental torture could be over. But of course, the universe was never on his side.
The days seemed to be passing by slower and slower as the clock ticked on. That spare time was filled with training and what little paperwork there was left, but soon enough, it became scarce. And with nothing to do, cheerful chatter and pity filled invitations rentered Simon’s life once again. Simon was used to getting invitations from Johnny, Kyle, John, and even Laswell had tried to invite him but he turned them all down this year. He just couldn’t take it this year. He couldn't stand the guilt of being in someone else's home anymore, acting like he belonged instead of being an outlier. It was truly unbearable feeling to be surrounded by a loving family. It was like another reminder of what he didn't have. So this year he’d rather be alone on base than feel alone while surrounded by people.
And in quick time, Simon got what he asked for. One by one, he watched soldiers leave base to go back home to their loved ones. The base soon grew eerily quiet, as if time has stopped. Simon knew the voices of his comrades would fade away, but to not even hear a single footstep echo throughout the halls left him a bit paranoid. Too quiet was never a good thing, but it was excepted when only a handful of soldiers had stayed on base this holiday. Simon would mostly see them in the mess hall - sometimes passing by each other in the halls. Simon had even seen his comrades a couple times, hanging up even more Christmas decorations to keep the spirit alive, but it was hopeless. With most of the soldiers gone, this place was like a ghost town. Simon wouldn’t have been surprised if he saw one of the Christmas spirits roaming the halls.
The hallways were silent that night. Simon couldn't even hear his own footsteps. Out of habit he supposed. But Simon couldn't sleep tonight. It was sort of comical, not being able to sleep on Christmas Eve like a child. A scoff had left Simon’s lips at that thought. When Simon had exited his barracks room, he didn't really know where he was taking himself to. But somewhere along the way his mind had decided to head to the armory, so that’s where he went. He needed yo distract his own mind anyways.
But when he had gotten close to the armory, his eyebrows furrowed underneath his mask as he saw the armory light on. The soft clinking of metal had even reached Simon’s ears, only making him more confused. “Who the hell is up this late?” He thought to himself. As Simon turned the corner to enter the armory he saw you, sitting at one of the metal tables working away at a pistol with a cleaning kit. You were already looking up at the entryway before he had entered, yet once you had both met eyes you had gotten back to work.
There was a bit of a silence as Ghost watched you for a moment. It was a bit.. Odd, to say the least. To see you like this, out of uniform in some hoodie and sweats. Ghost didn't judge you, he was wearing something along the same lines. But it was odd because in this moment, it didn't feel like a Lieutenant and a Sergeant on the field. It felt human, vulnerable in some sort of way that silently connected you both. That connection and mutual understanding of being one of the only ones still here alone while everyone else was back home with family and friends. And that connection had Ghost wanting to step forth so he could get to know you better as a person rather then as a soldier.
“TYR?” Ghost asked, finally breaking the silence which made you look up once more. You gave him a nod before looking back down at your gun. Going back to lubricating the springs and slide rails.
“Yeah, just finishing up.” You commented while you carefully placed the parts back onto the towel. You then grabbed another towel to wipe away the oil and grease on your hands.
Ghost approached, going to sit down across from you. He watched as you worked away at the pistol and wiped your hands. “Figured.”
“Do you want to help?” You looked back up at Ghost, looking for any sign of disinterest. But Ghost showed none as he carefully pulled the towel to be in the middle of the metal table, so both men could reach the parts.
“I’ll start resembling it,”
“On it.”
A silence had fallen over the armory except for the soft clinks of metal. It was an easy rhythm to get into as you both knew how to do this like the back of your hand. It was calming, peaceful even despite the violence this one pistol could cause.
“So, what’re you doing here?” You asked, your tone genuine as you placed another piece of the pistol back onto the towel for Ghost to resemble.
“Am I not allowed to be here, Sergeant?” Ghost quipped in return, looking over at the other man with hooded eyes.
“Well of course you are,” you confirmed with a slight smile, “I meant, what’re you still doing here at base? Wouldn't you rather spend Christmas back home?”
“I could be asking you the same thing.” Ghost replied while he focused on carefully putting some of the pieces back together, and using the nearby tools when needed.
A soft chuckle left your lips as you spoke, “Touché. But it’s — well, it’s complicated.” You explained with a sheepish smile and a shrug of your shoulders. Your eyes left Ghost’s figure and returned to the last few parts that needed greasing.
Ghost raised an eyebrow at that and his head lifted to focus on you. Ghost took you in for a moment before he replied, “I’ve heard that a million times before.” Ghost reached out a hand and placed it on your side of the metal table. Ghost wanted to reach out for you, but he couldn't fully being himself to. That was to intimidate for his taste. But Ghost’s hand had caught your attention, making your eyes meet his. And Ghost nodded your way, gesturing for you to continue, “C’mon mate, try me. Can’t be that complicated.”
“..It’s not that complicating, it’s just —” You cut yourself off with a sigh while your movements paused as well. You couldn't blantly admit to something as vulnerable as this. It gave you this sickening feeling in your stomach to be so openly vulnerable to someone, or anyone for that matter. But you had brought up the topic, so it was only fair that you’d feel confident enough to answer if you expected Ghost to do the same. “It’s just that I’ve got no home or family to spend Christmas with.. So I stay here.”
Ghost’s widened slightly as he took in your words. It gave him a sense of relief and sympathetic to know you both shared a similar story. Loosing the people you were close to just to be left with a burden that forever haunted your mind. Both men shared that burden, that mutual understanding of being alone on a day that was supposed to be shared with those you loved and cared for. But maybe you didn't have to be alone anymore.
“Yeah,” Ghost muttered more to himself at the realization. His eyes left yours for a second and drifted to the distance between you both. Yet it only lasted for a moment before your eyes met once more. “I understand that.”
“Really?” You asked with a bit of surprise in your tone. Your eyes searched the other man’s to see if he really did understand. Understand like Ghost personally knew how agonizing it always was to see every other soldier go home and imagine them getting warm hugs and happy smiles while you didn't. How unbearable it was to know that you had no one waiting for you outside of these walls. And as you searched Ghost’s eyes you could see it. Whether it was just that gut feeling you had, or that sorrow glint in his eye that made you think he truly did understand without speaking a word. But whatever it was, it convinced you. That made your expression soften with that sympathy and relief Ghost was feeling too.
Ghost saw your acceptance in your expression that you had figured it out too. That you both shared a common experiences. It was relieving to know you weren't alone anymore, but you never were to begin with. You just never knew before that you weren't alone even though that’s all you felt. You just had to find that someone that would truly understand your situation.
“Well,, maybe we don’t need to find somewhere else to spend Christmas.” You stated with hope in your voice and a soft smile on your lips. You didn't care if you had your hopes to high, this was the first time in who knows how long since you’ve gotten the chance to spend Christmas with another. You weren't going to let that chance slip away between your fingers. Even if you got rejected it didn't mater.
“Maybe we could spend Christmas together instead?”
“..Well what did you have in mind?”