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People think that Bakugou is emotionally constipated or out of touch with his feelings or some shit. It’s unfortunately the complete opposite.
He knows exactly how he feels. Too well, actually. And it's making him insane.
It’s messing with his training. He’s been throwing himself into workouts, pushing his body past its limits. He’s trying to burn it out of his system. But it doesn’t matter how hard he punches, how fast he runs, or how loud he screams—it’s still there.
He is still there.
Let’s imagine, for a second, that yes, Bakugou Katsuki has “fallen in love.” Whatever. Let’s imagine that, despite all his efforts to keep people at arm's length he’s been reckless enough to catch feelings for someone. And not just anyone.
No. He’s gone and fallen for his best fucking friend.
He’s not going to bottle his feelings. He’s not dumb. Bottling shit up is for losers who can’t handle their own emotions.
But liking someone doesn’t mean needing to do something about it.
He’s fine with what they have.
He doesn’t need anything more.
He doesn’t—
"Bakugouuu, babe, we're leaving!" Mina’s voice rang out as she left the classroom. "Kirishima’s waiting for you, lover boy! I thought you'd never stop staring!" she winked.
"Wh—I—Shut the fuck up! Mind your own bussines!" he snapped, but it was too late. The classroom was already empty.
Shit. He’d zoned out again. Was he really staring? Not that it mattered if she knew about his feelings. He did know, so checkmate, whatever.
He shoved his stuff into his bag, muttering curses under his breath. His phone buzzed, interrupting his thoughts.
"Why did you take so long to answer, brat?" his mother’s unimpressed voice greeted him.
"I’m hanging up."
"Don’t test me brat. I’ll be at your door in two hours."
"Fucking fine. What do you want?"
"I swear, you give me a headache..." She muttered under her breath "I just wanted to know how you’re doing kid."
"Whatever. I know you’re calling because you think I can’t take care of myself, but I can. Also, I’m fucking busy, I have 30 minutes to eat and—"
"You haven’t eaten yet?"
Shit, it slipped. "Doesn’t matter. Kirishima probably already paid for my lunch. If I don’t make it in time, I’ll text him—"
As if summoned, a voice chimed in from behind him. "Bakugou! I was looking for you, dude. You haven’t eaten anything, so I brought you some snacks!"
Bad timing. "—ah, thanks, Kirishima. Just hold on; I’m on a call with my mom."
"Oh! Hello, Mrs. Bakugou! Hope you’re having a great day!" Kirishima shouted near the phone he was holding, grinning brightly.
Bakugou tried not to notice how close Kirishima had gotten, how his freckles stood out under the fluorescent lights and how the little eyeliner he always wore framed his eyes beautifully. He couldn’t focus on the words anymore; his brain blurred anything that wasn't him.
"So. Kirishima Eijirou," his mother’s voice cut through his thoughts, emphasizing each word.
"Damn it." He said, closing his eyes. Kirishima had already left. How long had he been standing there with his mouth hanging open like an idiot?
"I remember him. He placed second in the physical exam, right? Is he the one who kept calling you during the holidays?" she asked, her voice teasing.
An then "You like him, don’t you?"
Why did everyone say it like that. Like it was a secret. Like it meant something its doesn't
"I do," he admitted, the words sharp and direct.
"Wait—WHAT? Really? That’s amazing, when are yo—"
"It’s not. It’s annoying. It’s my problem and I won't do anything about it." He hung up before she could respond.
It wasn't getting any better.
During training that afternoon, Bakugou found himself distracted again. Kirishima’s laugh echoed across the gym as he sparred with Sero, his movements quick and fluid. Bakugou’s eyes kept drifting to the way Kirishima’s hands gripped his sparring gloves, strong and steady.
Fuck, he wanted to hold those hands. Wanted to lace their fingers together and see what it felt like. The thought pissed him off because it was so fucking stupid, and yet he couldn’t shake it.
"Bakugou, focus!" Aizawa barked, snapping him out of his thoughts.
He growled in frustration, throwing himself back into the exercise with renewed determination. But even as he moved, the image of Kirishima’s hands stayed in the back of his mind.
At lunch, it was somehow worse. Kirishima sat across from him, chatting animatedly about some new workout routine. Bakugou tried to focus on his food, but all he could think about was how easy it would be to reach across the table and touch his hair that was now tied in a low ponytail.
"You okay, man? You’ve been really quiet," Kirishima whispered, getting closer, concern flickering in his eyes.
He stood up abruptly, earning some curious glances from the others "I’m fine. Eat your damn food," Bakugou snapped, looking away. But his heart wasn’t in it, and he could tell Kirishima knew something was up.
"Bakugou, Its me"
He shot a glance from his bed to the door. What was he doing here? He got up. It was a little early even for him to go to bed but the day had been exhausting and fuck it, he just wanted to lay down and drown in his fucked up k-drama impossible love story with his fucking best friend.
“Oh you are already in your PJs, great!”
Damm it. It was a sleepover.
Kirishima was chilling in his bed reading his magazines but worst he was wearing in his pajamas ("You left them in my dorm the other day, I'm just giving them back") Yeah right.
Bakugou wasn’t nervous. He didn’t get nervous . Fear was for people who didn’t know how to handle shit, and Bakugou knew exactly what he was doing.
He didn’t need to complicate things by putting a label on whatever he and Kirishima had. Their friendship was solid. They trained together, ate together, hung out after school. Kirishima was the only one Bakugou could really stand for long periods of time, the only one who didn’t piss him off just by breathing.
And that was enough .
“Dude. why are you on the floor, get up here, there’s plenty space”
Hell. no.
This were the moments where he hated the fact that Kirishima’s love language was probably physical touch or something.
Every time Kirishima slinged an arm around his neck or fell asleep on his shoulder, it became harder to stop himself from leaning into him.
The worst, though, were his hands.
Kirishima always used his hands when he talked—gesturing wildly, emphasizing every point with a grin and a laugh. And sometimes, when he was especially excited, he’d grab Bakugou’s hand to pull him along or make a point. It was casual, innocent.
Except now, Bakugou couldn’t stop thinking about it. The weight of Kirishima’s hand, the way their fingers brushed—hell, even the thought of holding hands with him made Bakugou’s chest feel tight.
It was fucking annoying.
He clenched and unclenched his fists, trying to push the thoughts away, but they kept coming back. The idea of holding hands. Of resting his head on Kirishima’s shoulder. Of kissing him.
The thought hit him like a punch to the gut. Kissing. He wanted to kiss Kirishima.
Bakugou groaned, covering his face with his hands. What the fuck was wrong with him?
“Bakugou”
Shit, he was staring again. Why does that keeps happening?
He sounded- mad? He turned around immediately only to find the redhead sitting at the edge of the bed staring at his hands.
“Look,” He sounded upset. “I know something is up with you, I don’t know what it is exactly but I want to help. You know you can talk to me about anything right?
That the thing. He can’t, not only will it be awkward as fuck, it could ruin their friendship. But, he couldn’t really deny him anything at this point.
“Do you,” He cleared his throat and continued “Have you ever dated anyone?”
Kirishimas smiles faltered but it was back immediately. His pretty eyelashes fluttered 5 times in half-blinks before he focused her gaze on Bakugou.
“I- I- Um no, I haven’t” He looked unsure but eventually asked “Why- why do you want to know?”
Fuck this was so uncool, exactly the opposite of what he wanted to be in front of him. Sue him, he liked the guy.
“I'm just curious what- what would you do if you were in a relationship”
“Oh- right. Um well, I would try to be a manly boyfriend! Y’know- like opening the door and doing handmade chocolate for Valentine's-”
“No- Fuck” Get over with this “I mean like- holding hands and kissing” the last part sounded more like a whisper. Fucking embarassing.
“Sorry what was that”
Fuck his life really.
“KISSING, WOULD YOU KISS HER”
There was a few seconds of silence and Bakugou was ready to run out of his own room like a coward if Kirishima didn't do it first.
“I would, I would kiss them”
He didn’t realised when Kirishima had leaved the bed and now he was looking him right in the eye with an expression that was a mix of worrisome and tenderness.
“Bakugou, is this what has you worried? Do you- do you want to kiss someone?”
Holy shit. They were kissing, they were fucking kissing. His mind went blank, hands moving on their own—gripping, pulling, desperate. He couldn’t get enough. He didn’t want to stop. He couldn’t.
Fear of not being reciprocated was out of the question with the way Kirishimas hands were caressing his face and his chest and then his face again.
It was and out of body experience. It was like his lips and hands had a mind of their own and they were craving to have Kirishima closer.
It wasn't enough.
They finally broke the kiss to catch their breaths.
But it wasn't enough.
Their hands were still over each other and they were still extremely close.
But it still wasn't enough.
“I can’t be your friend,” He blurted
Kirshima's gaze dropped and he tried to put some distance between them but Bakugou stopped him and kept going
“Don't mean it like that I-” Damm it, Breath he reminds himself. He is seconds away from passing out “Being your friend its the best thing that has ever happened to me but its not enough, not anymore”
Kirishimas eyes were wide and so full of warmth. "Do you mean it?" He whispered
He could feel his heart thumping in his ears and he had never been so aware of how sweaty his hands were. He nodded
Kirishima gift one of his signature smiles but not the ones he used with friends or in battles, it was more subtle, intimate, it felt like it was only his "I tought you would never say it" and he gave him a quick peck in the corner of his lips.
Bakugou froze
Kirishima sighed and smiled, content "Its not enough for me either. It hasn't been for a long time"
Bakugou passed out.