Work Text:
“Fuck…” Kirsten was drunk. Amy was too. Work New Year’s Eve party or just an unofficial gathering for the lucky few who didn’t have to work that day. Kirsten had to do some convincing but in the end she managed to persuade Amy to come. Even though they were a secret nobody could know about Kirsten still wanted Amy there. They could still talk. And look at each other.
Kirsten emerald dress was a perfect match to her hair and eyes and seeing her at the entrance to the restaurant made the next breath hitch in Amy’s throat. She was gorgeous.
Amy didn’t look so bad herself. Secretly, not even fully admitting the fact to herself, she was excited for the night.
For both the event and what would come after.
She and Kirsten took separate cabs but their destination was the same – Amy’s flat.
Of the two Kirsten arrived last, Amy already waiting inside. She got up from her couch, taking a step towards Kirsten. They both tasted like whiskey. They still hadn’t slept together, Amy needed more time. But their make out sessions could get pretty heated.
“Fuck!” repeated Kirsten. Then she did what she had never done before, the alcohol in her system taking over her actions. She tilted her head and kissed the skin of Amy’s neck with a moan.
It immediately set off an alarm in Amy’s brain. She would never admit it but she never completely relaxed, never let herself go, always on guard to some extent.
She pushed Kirsten’s shoulders lightly, taking a step back. “Wait.” Kirsten looked at her in confusion, breathing heavily.
“It will leave a mark,” said Amy, the spot where Kirsten’s lips were seconds ago, faintly red.
“Right…” Sober Kirsten knew that. Sober Kirsten always had that in mind, she had never crossed the line, knowing that it would spook Amy. It wasn’t about the inconvenience and questionable effectiveness of ice cubes, turtlenecks or concealers. It laid much, much deeper, beneath the surface. It was about trust. Until Amy relaxed completely Kirsten couldn’t either.
Drunk Kirsten lost control.
Just for a second.
Now neither of them knew where to look.
***
“God, that was good!” said Kirsten, entering Amy’s flat, satisfied with the workout.
They went on a run together. After some hard work with her therapist Amy discovered it could be turned from an unhealthy escape mechanism to a somewhat healing one. And Amy needed that after ‘Vigil’. She also needed Kirsten. So she decided why not combine the two.
They were both in the kitchen, Kirsten pouring herself a glass of water while Amy stared at the way her t-shirt and a few loose strands of hair clung to her heated, sweaty skin. She had been staring at Kirsten a lot those days, kind of making up for lost time and getting caught in the process more than once.
It happened again but before Kirsten could say anything or tease her lightly Amy took the glass from her hand, putting it on the counter as she backed Kirsten into it.
“What…?”
A second later Kirsten was returning a kiss, her arms clasping around Amy, who felt a little dizzy and restless.
Suddenly she threw her head back. “… please,” she rasped.
Kirsten blinked, a little bit taken aback. She would still get shocked sometimes when Amy took the lead instead of hiding behind the passivity like she used to do before.
“But… it might leave a mark.” No matter how much she wanted to comply she needed to make sure.
Amy looked her right in the eyes. “I don’t care. I want it. I want it all.”
Kirsten’s breathing quickened as she heard Amy’s words, her pupils dilating. Still she reminded just in case, “you are a Detective Chief Inspector.”
“We will use ice. Or a concealer. Or I will wear a scarf.” Amy didn’t really care.
“Did you read a WikiHow article on how to hide a hickey?” Kirsten arched an eyebrow playfully.
“Just kiss me already, wise-ass.”
***
Amy knew Kirsten changed her.
In a deep spiritual way. But also in a very practical one. The realization came gradually. With small things or for Amy not so small. For example before Kirsten she would have never even imagined or considered kissing somebody at work, right at the station. Let alone be pressed against the wall on the staircase leading to the roof, clutching into Kirsten, both of them lost in each other and lost to the world.
The redhead broke the kiss and Amy almost groaned in protest , but she didn’t have time to, lips latching onto her neck. Amy threw her head back to give Kirsten better access.
Her senses were overtaken by Kirsten, but suddenly an annoying ding tried to get through. Belatedly, breathing heavily Amy realized it was her phone.
“Fuck,” muttered Kirsten as Amy looked down.
“Robertson,” she sighed, her neck straightening again. Kirsten blinked, squinting.
Oh.
Oh.
That was bad.
“They need me in the field. ASAP.”
“Um…” Kirsten bit her lip. There was something more to it than just the disappointment of being so rudely interrupted.
“What?”
“Well…” Kirsten took Amy’s phone and opened the camera, pointing it at the right height. Amy leaned closer, her hand snapping to her neck in a matter of seconds.
“Oh, Jesus!”
“I’m sorry?” Kirsten offered, trying to hold back laughter.
“Are you?” Amy estimated the purple damage blooming on her skin another time. “I need a scarf. Or a sweater. Or both!”
“It’s summer, love,” reminded Kirsten gently.
“I know!” her phone dinged again. “For fuck’s sake.” She couldn’t exactly pull up the collar of her blouse. And she had no concealer in her purse. And running around the station looking for one wasn’t an option. She doubted it would even fix the situation. Kirsten was… passionate and never half-arsed anything even when it came to accidental hickeys as it turned out.
Amy outranked everyone at the scene. And there was some solace in that. She pierced the giggling officers with a murderous glare.
The only witness was still too shaken to notice the aftermath of the heated make out.
When she returned to the station the gossip machine was already too late to stop. But Amy herself got to stop and think. About how little she actually cared about the whole ordeal in the grand scheme of things. They were girlfriends. They loved each other. That wasn’t going anywhere. Everyone who mattered knew that. And yeah, such thing as professional boundaries still existed and Amy cared about it but not to a degree everyone, including herself, thought she would. Kirsten got pulled into a briefing and then operation planning so it had been more than a few hours before Amy got a message from her. Somehow Kirsten knew she needed a break.
Meet me on the roof.
Will I end up with another hickey?
Maybe. Or you could get your sweet revenge, you know… Kidding. Unless I’m not…
Amy shook her head getting up from her desk.
Amy before Kirsten would never.
Kirsten changed her.
Left a mark on her.