Chapter Text
In his dreams, Eridan lived in a world where he trusted science.
It was a dim world that didn't hurt his eyes, and the water didn't smell of distillation and chemicals. In his dreams, Eridan was a king.
Or, well. Something like that.
Even in his dreams, though, Eridan was alone. So very alone.
~ ~ ~
He had never pictured himself as a corporate bitch, but maybe there was something about the image of being bent over a desk, fondling state of the art tools, that had temporarily overwhelmed his sanity just long enough for him to apply. Anyway, his internship was only for six months, after which he'd get his degree and be a bona fide roboticist. Then, he could offer his skills to less obviously evil overlords.
If such a thing existed.
He was pretty sure he'd start his own company. It would probably involve porn and robots. Porn, robots, and horses in some combination. He hadn't actually decided on a name, yet. But that day was still far enough in the future that he figured he had time to ruminate on it.
Today, unfortunately, was not that day. Today, he was reporting for his first day of work, walking through the gleaming hallways towards what was supposed to be the robotics laboratory. Today, he was just beginning his servitude to the evil overlords of Crocker Corp.
Today, Dirk was fucking lost.
He was pretty sure he was just on the wrong floor. Robotics was on the sixth floor, but here he could hear yelps and cries, whimpers and barks. This had to be the animal experimentation level, an area of scientific research that Dirk generally tried to pretend didn't exist in order to maintain his sanity.
Right now he was thinking a bit too hard about the animals behind these walls, and the tortures that they went through on a daily basis, and that made him think equally hard about the collection of awesome anime swords back at his apartment.
But strifing the shit out of the place wasn't on the agenda for today, though the longer he walked the less he could remember why. Until he passed a wide window. And he stopped. And turned.
It was an aquarium, and the lights cast a wavering blue light over the wall opposite as they filtered through the water held back by the thin sheet of glass.
It was the sort of thing that might have made Dirk press his nose to the glass and 'oooh' if he were fifteen years younger than he was. It was sure to hold a magical landscape of rocks and waving green fronds, coral and darting fish. Enough to entertain for hours.
But he wasn't five, he was twenty. He didn't press his nose to the glass, but he did look closer, and discovered that this particular aquarium only contained one creature more highly evolved than a plant or coral. And it was a troll.
The troll floated in the middle of the tank, its webbed feet paddling lazily as it moved in a restless circle, back and forth, back and forth, its eyes staring unblinking and shockingly violet. Its hair streamed back, long and undulating like black fronds of kelp.
Dirk touched the glass of the tank before he had consciously realized he was going to. He didn't knock like an obnoxious ass, but nevertheless the troll seemed to sense his presence. It abruptly stopped swimming and turned, its hair moving in a cloud around its face. It had fins on the sides of its face, which flared comically, showing bright purple webbing between the grey spines.
As it shifted, Dirk saw a brilliant lock of purple hair in amongst the black, like a brightly-coloured fish glimpsed amongst the weeds.
Dirk thought that fish couldn't see outside of aquariums, that the insides of the glass was mirrored because of the water, but to his shock he discovered that he was wrong. Their eyes met, and locked.
Dirk expected the eyes to be like a shark's, staring and blank and inhuman, but as he stared into those amazing violet eyes, he saw intense, immense sadness and pain. And hope.
He'd never actually interacted with a troll before in his life, though he'd seen the odd one being walked out in swanky neighbourhoods, or on TV. They were the kind of exotic pet that only the really rich could afford. They said that trolls were amazingly intelligent, and could even learn a few words.
He'd fantasized a few times about bringing one home, but it was a pipe dream, like being turned into a centaur, or fucking a gagged and bound Leonardo Di Caprio.
"I thought you trolls were animals," he murmured to himself.
The troll's fins flattened up and back, and its eyes narrowed. Then, with a flick of its arms and feet, it swam behind a large rock in the tank.
"Fuck," Dirk swore. Had it heard what he said? Had it understood? He pressed his hands to the tank. "Hang on, man. I'm sorry. That was a shitty thing to say."
The troll peeked out from behind the rock, a single violet eye gleaming at him through the water.
It took just that for Dirk to come to a decision. He smiled at the troll. "I'll be back. I promise."
Then he turned and hurried down the corridor. There had to be an elevator, and it couldn't be much further ahead.
~ ~ ~
TG: hey bro
TG: how was your first day at school
TG: did you remember to bring a shiny apple and leave it on your teachers desk
TG: what am i kidding
TG: you probably brought a whole bushel of apples and then displayed your own shiny apples in the very middle spread and waiting for something i probably dont want to think about
TG: are you hot for teacher
TG: hot hot hot for teacher
TG: dirk
TG: shit are you seriously not home from work yet
TG: its the middle of the night there what the heck did you actually hook up with someone on your first day
TG: dont tell me they like puppets
~ ~ ~
As the sword shattered the glass and water cascaded down the hall, accompanied by the voices of hundreds of animals already released from their cages, Dirk comforted himself with the certainty that the internet had said that sea trolls could breathe air.
The troll flopped onto the floor, gasping, its gills gaping purple slashes along its ribs and its claws scrabbling desperately on the wet floor. Dirk dropped to his knees beside it, grabbing its thin shoulders, hair snarling around his fingers. His heart pounded. Was the internet wrong?
"Breathe!" he snapped. "You're out of the water. Come on, breathe air."
The troll opened its mouth, showing a double row of needle-like teeth, and drew in a long, shuddering breath. Its gills snapped shut and he breathed, its chest rising and falling as it gasped lungfuls of air, expelling the last of the water from its body.
"I'm getting you out of here," Dirk said. "Come on."
Nodding jerkily, the troll got to its feet, bare toes curling against the floor. "Where--?"
Holy shit, it could really talk. The word was barely audible, croaking and raspy, but understandable. Dirk kept hold of the troll's hand. It was shaking and its breathing was still ragged. He wasn't sure the troll could walk far on its own, and it was important to get going. The alarms were ringing, and he was sure security would be along any minute.
Boy, this was fucking stupid.
"Follow me," he said, and raced towards the door he'd jimmied and propped open with one of his swords. The troll stumbled after him, slipping and skidding, and jerking from side to side, all long limbs and awkwardness.
It threw off Dirk's stride, and now he could hear shouting. Hopefully the rampaging animals and the damage he'd done to the aquarium would delay them, but there was no guarantee it would delay them long enough.
"Wait, wait," he said, skidding to a stop. The troll nearly crashed into him, and let out a high keening noise of terror.
"Hurry!" said the troll.
Dirk crouched down. "Get on my back," he ordered.
There was a moment of confusion, but then the troll clambered up, curling his legs around Dirk's waist and wrapping his arms around his neck. Dirk hooked his arms under the troll's thighs, straightened up, muscles bunching, and tested his balance. Then he ran on, troll attached like a baby chimp to his mother's back.
He hit the door with a shoulder without slowing down. The troll yelped and hissed, jerking back and temporarily throwing Dirk off-balance. The door was a heavy metal security door, but it opened wide. After regaining his footing, Dirk paused just long enough to grab his sword, eliminating the proof of his presence, then he raced towards the parking lot.
The building did have a night shift, and the parking lot was about half full. That was good, because meant there was some chance that his presence here wouldn't be noticed.
Unfortunately, Dirk's car was a bubblegum pink Geo Metro hatchback that Dave had bought him a few months before when he landed his first movie deal. It was a hilariously horrible car, barely large enough for Dirk to sit inside without hunching, and he had to push the driver's seat all the way back to fit his legs. He loved it. But it was a little conspicuous. He'd solved the problem by parking in the pool of a bright overhead light, amongst the biggest group of cars. He could only hope no one had noticed it simply because it was so obvious and not trying to hide.
Anyway, he'd only worked for CrIT Co. for one day. No one would know his car, yet, or connect it with him unless they saw him leaving.
As of yet, he didn't see anyone around, thank goodness.
There wasn't a back seat in his car. He opened the back hatch and crouched down again. "Get in and cover up," he said. "Don't let anyone see you."
The troll paused, looking around with fins flat against his neck and quivering. He was visibly shaking, though the night was warm at this time of the summer in Houston. But he obeyed, climbing into the hatch. There was a small collection of brightly-coloured smuppets nested there, and the troll curling up in a ball amongst them. His eyes gleamed out at Dirk as he closed the hatch, lowering the vinyl cover to completely conceal the troll from view.
He jumped into the driver's seat and started the engine. Working hard not to rush, or to do anything suspicious, he pulled out of the spot and rolled towards the outer gate. It was guarded at all hours, and he had had to swipe his card when he arrived. Now he would have to do the same when he left.
Good thing he'd stolen the card of the head of the biological science division as he left at the end of the shift. He didn't mind framing the guy who'd been keeping the troll - and all the other animals - caged up and performing experiments on them. Fuck that.
He paused at the security gate, his heart pounding. He was aware that his clothes were soaking wet, his hair plastered down. All the product had been washed out, and he was sure anyone who knew him would recognize that something was terribly wrong with a single glance. However, he could only hope that the guard at the gate wouldn't realize anything was amiss.
As the guard looked down at him, Dirk crooked a smile at him, pushing up his sunglasses. "Have a good evening," he said in a measured tone, reaching out the open window to swipe the stolen card.
The guard looked back towards the building. "Yeah. G'nite." Then he paused. "Nice car."
"Thanks."
The barrier went up, and Dirk rolled serenely on through, turned onto the street and drove away. He drove three blocks, then gunned it and raced for home as fast as his V-4 engine could take him.