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For Astro, the true meaning of relief was to hear the elevator open right after completing the last machine. It was the knowledge that he was just a couple of steps away from surviving another floor, getting a well-deserved break and hopefully healing any damage that the twisteds had dealt him after they dug their claws into his skin—assuming Dandy would have a spare bandage.
The deeper he went, the worse things he witnessed. And the more these nightmares overlapped his fragile mind, the more he felt insanity hanging over his shoulder. He was certain there wasn’t a lot that could surprise him anymore, there was only so much that could continuously have such a strong effect on him, but this was unlike anything he had ever expected.
Rewinding to the memories that made his heart race, he ran to the elevator as fast as he could, but even that felt too slow. Perhaps, this heavy baggage of pains that seemed to wrap around his heart like thorny vines was his eventual, creeping decline.
Those crimson-hued eyes that stared at him akin to a laser, burning into his vision seemed to linger on him all the time, even when the twisted was nowhere to be seen. He remembered the tiredness he was suddenly drowning in, making him wish for sleep that would last an eternity—yet he fought it with all his might, knowing there would be no way out once he surrendered to it.
The entity that crossed his path was strikingly similar to him, and that awareness fed on the remnants of his shattered sanity. Was it his mirror image? A reflection of his, but if soaked with ichor beyond belief? Seeing such a version of himself fueled him with a whole different kind of anxiety and a gut feeling that nagged him constantly with its unbearable weight—one that tried to decode the cryptic message that seemed to be buried deep, but couldn’t comprehend its entirety.
He just wanted this floor to be over, to see Dandy at least this one last time.
So, when the elevator finally closed behind him, he sighed heavily, leaning against the now shut door. He tried to compose himself and relax for a second, but it seemed like an impossible task when all these violent recollections of what had just happened flickered constantly inside of his head akin to a broken light bulb.
At the very least, he was lucky enough to not be injured—not physically. But his dim mental well-being was still quickly noticed by Dandy.
“You look like you’ve seen a ghost, starlight,” he said in a low tone, trying not to accidentally add fuel to Astro’s growing panic, especially being aware that he should have been the one held responsible for all the corruption he had created, for the whole ichor operation. “Are you hurt?”
Dandy’s concern was like a gentle melody that managed to soothe some of Astro’s fears by itself. The lone thought of having someone who cared and loved him was calming, even if only ever so slightly.
But the paranoia of each moment they shared being possibly their last was too much to handle. The next floor could always be the last one, even with all the healing items that Dandy tried his best to provide him with. Against the worst scenario, there was only so much he could do to help. Astro felt like a glass statue, as if he could collapse any second and break into thousands of pieces.
He sat on the icy floor and buried his face under his blanket, trying to hide just how much of a mess he truly was. After all this time, it shouldn’t have such an impact on him anymore. Too much time had passed. So, why was he panicking? Was the sight of another version of him entirely succumbed to the darkness really too much? Though he already experienced things far more brutal and tragic, this seemed to be the final nail in the coffin—despite being seemingly so mild.
There was this enigmatic feeling surrounding the lone idea of ever meeting and perceiving himself from a third person perspective. Or even just the thought of bumping into himself in his dreams—an impostor claiming to be him. There were so many ways this could terrify, it had unlimited potential. When the line between reality and nightmares began getting progressively more smudged, everything was to be expected.
Perhaps, that was the exact fear within him that got harshly woken up by the twisted, reactivating it.
“...No,” he finally replied, snapping back into reality as he heard Dandy reaching for a bandage. He didn’t need it, the only thing wounded was his peace of mind. “I just saw something terrifying,” he explained, hoping he could finally calm down—but that was an abstract dream.
“What’s important is that you made it out of that floor.” He settled down next to Astro. “Look at me, please,” he pleaded, hoping he could do anything to make him feel better. Seeing his lover suffering ached like a broken heart, he wanted to be there for him, do everything in his power to silence his pains.
“...I can never be sure if I am not seeing you for the last time, these floors are getting… unbearable.” Fighting the tears that threatened to spill, his voice turned out hushed.
“I always make sure you will be able to heal yourself if anything happens. And if what I give you is not enough, I tend your injuries here,” he said softly, trying to comfort him—assure him that he would always be there for him. “I do everything in my power to help you.”
“I know… and I love you.” A heavy sigh once again escaped him. Thankfulness for having Dandy by his side would never fade away with everything he was doing to ensure his survival; but along with that, a strong feeling of guilt flashed here and there akin to thunder. He didn’t want to keep burdening him with all these emotions he constantly carried on his back. It felt wrong. Even if he had tapes to give in exchange, it wasn’t enough.
“I love you too.” He smiled, planting a soft kiss on his forehead. No matter how many times he heard these words, they always warmed his heart. “I’ll always be here for you. No matter what.”
“Thank you for taking care of me.” Astro felt his emotions slowly give him more room to breathe, a weight was lifted off of his shoulders remembering that he was not alone—that Dandy would put his best efforts into keeping him safe, no matter the cost.
Maybe, not everything was so tragic.