Chapter Text
“Sherlock, this is horrible. What did you do to it?”
“Preposterous. I followed your directions exactly.”
John sighed and took another sip, wincing at the taste. Whatever Sherlock had done, he had certainly not brewed a proper cuppa.
“Tell me what you did.”
“I boiled the water,”
Sherlock had crossed his arms defensively by this point, and was frowning.
“Then I poured it into the mug and added the tea bags.”
“...tea bags?”
“Tea bags, yes. I let them steep for several minutes, then added the milk and sugar, as per your directions. One splash, and one spoonful.”
“Sherlock, how many tea bags did you use?”
“Five. Perhaps I should have used more? You didn’t specify.”
John sighed heavily, rubbing his face.
“You’re only meant to use one tea bag, Sherlock.”
Sherlock frowned.
“But you prefer strong tea.”
“Yes, which is why I let it brew longer.”
“So… One bag, then? And let it sit longer?”
“Yes.”
“Right.”
“This is… This is much better,”
John did his best to hide his grimace as he sipped the tea Sherlock had brought him – fifth cup in an hour, each one slightly better than the last, but still horribly, horribly wrong.
“No, something’s wrong. What’s wrong, what’ve I done wrong this time?”
“I don’t know, Sherlock, tell me what you did.”
It was honestly confusing as hell – Sherlock was a genius, why was he having so much difficulty figuring out how to brew a cup of tea?
“I boiled the water, and put one tea bag in the mug. Then I added the water and let it brew. Then I added the milk and sugar. That’s all.”
John sighed heavily and took another sip, doing his level best to detect the problem.
“Sherlock… Bring me the milk.”
Sherlock stalked off to the kitchen and returned a moment later with the milk.
“It’s gone off. You’ve been using spoiled milk.”
“What now.”
“Have you been using salt instead of sugar?”
“No, of course not, I… Maybe.”