Chapter Text
Tik tik tik
The monotonous ticking of the grandfather clock on the first floor of Grimmauld Place was the only sound that broke the indefinite silence that was Harry’s life at the moment. Harry was laying along an ancient couch in the living room, staring at the floral pattern of its fabric; the colours had faded over the years, and what Harry assumed used to be bright, vibrant flowers were now dull and wilted.
This bleak mood wasn’t just limited to his couch, no, it had bled into every aspect of Harry’s life now that the war was over. During his youth, he imagined his life post-war would be full of celebrations, an exciting job as an auror, and the love from his wife- Ginny. However, this dream was far from what actually happened.
Now that the war was over, crime seemed to simmer down, and work as an auror had never been more pointless. Besides the occasional petty theft, or illegal use of a polyjuice potion, Harry was mostly stuck with desk work— endless piles of paper work to review and sign, nothing like he had hoped his life would be.
And his love life, Merlin, don’t get him started on his love life. The depression that ensued from his lacklustre job put strain on Ginny and his relationship. All of his friends assumed that after the war ended he and Ginny would finnaly tie the knot; however, they both realized without the constant excitement of battles and mystery, they didn’t have much in common.
Dinners together were long and strenuous. Silence stretched out for prolonged intervals; after all, what was there to say?
It had been about a year since the war ended when Ginny finally broke it off. She said she still loved Harry very deeply, but was sure they would be better off as friends rather than lovers. Harry knew that deep down he felt the same, but at that moment he couldn’t bring himself to say anything, only helping Ginny pack her bags and bring them to the fireplace.
And that brings us to now, Harry’s seemingly pointless existence drained all joy from his soul. He went straight from work to home, never going out with his coworkers, or texting his friends, or visiting the Weasleys, it all felt awkward and staged, like everyday he was just going through the motions waiting for something to happen, but it never did.
Harry was pulled out of his thoughts by an abrupt knock at the door, “Harry? Harry are you in there? We’ve been texting you all week Harry! You haven’t responded, and you won’t talk to us at the office,” it was Hermione’s concerned voice that echoed through the foyer.
“Harry pleases mate, open the door we’re worried” and there was Ron— I guess he couldn’t ignore them forever.
It was true that Harry hadn’t texted either of them back in quite a while, but what was the point? Going out for another dinner at the Leaky Cauldron where they each sat in silence and ate their meals? No stories being passed around since there wasn’t anything of interest to share. “Harry come on, we know you’re in there,” said Ron.
Harry dragged himself off of the couch and trudged to the door, opening it up just enough so that he could peak his face out and greet his friends. “Oh finally, Harry please let us in we need to talk” said a concerned Hermione.
Her eyes were laced with worry and she grabbed the door as if Harry would slam it shut at any moment. “Yeah, sure, whatever. I’m not doing much at the moment anyway” replied Harry as he fully opened the door.
He led his friends to the living room and fell back on to his couch. They each sat down in a chair and just like usual, nothing was said.
Tik tik tik
Honestly, the clock was beginning to become bothersome. He wished the sound would disappear, the clock too, maybe his friends as well, and his job and his responsibilities and the weight of his past that kept him up at night, he wished he could just cast an evanesco and make them all vanish.
Harry finally looked up from the spot on the ground he had transfixed his vision on for the last five minutes to look at his friends. Hermione was anxiously bouncing her leg and giving the occasional side glance to Ron, who was biting his fingernails and looking back at her. Hermione finnaly chose to speak up— “Alright, well we can’t just sit here in silence forever, so I’ll say it: Harry, we are seriously concerned about how you’ve been living lately. You don’t talk to us, or anyone for that matter, you never go anywhere besides work and home, and for Merlin’s sake you can’t even look at us!”
“Yeah Harry,” Ron chimed in “and we’ve been thinking that, if you don’t make some real change soon, we’ll have to….” He trailed off at the end of his sentence, as if not having enough strength to finish the statement.
“We’ll have to admit you to an inpatient facility.” Hermione stated, not breaking eye contact with a shocked Harry.
“you’ll WHAT? Sure, I haven’t gone out much lately, and maybe I’ve been a bit down, but that doesn’t mean I’ve gone mental!”
“We know that Harry, we’re just really worried about you!” Hermione argued back.
“I’m not going to see some mind healer and talk about my feelings like an emotionally stunted twelve year old!”
“And we’re not asking you to do that mate, we just need to see some effort to get better.” Ron looked at him in pity, did they really think he was that depressed?
“Please Harry, we’re not doing this to punish you, and we’re not asking that you do some insane, performative act to pretend that you’ve miraculously recovered, just start hanging out with people, maybe go on a date? Hell, go outside and pick some flowers for all I care! We just need to know that you’re ok.”
Harry was about to yell back, but stopped himself when he saw the pained expressions on his friends faces. Clearly they hadn’t slept much, lines of worry and stress digging deep into their skin. Had he done this? Had he been putting his friends through so much pain because he was too busy wallowing in self pity? Maybe they were right, maybe he did need to change—
“Merlin, fine, if it’ll help you both sleep at night, I’ll do it.”
His friends sighed in relief. This really had been weighing on them, and Harry was too selfish to realize. “Ok, we’ll be back in a week to check on you.” Hermione said as she stood up.
Her and Ron both made their way to the front door. Ron turned the door knob and was about to step out before he called back, “we love you mate, we’re doing this because we love you.”
“I know,” Harry shouted back.
This was going to be hell.