Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

Katara was, in a way, very lucky—as Sokka liked to remind her. For one, she was born second. She liked to think that she actually pushed Sokka out first, but Sokka always rolled his eyes at the idea. He always claimed that his birthright was a blessing, that he was happy it fell upon him. Katara couldn’t understand this herself, being a slave to the people all your life did not sound appealing.

Yes, they were both royals. Prince Sokka and Princess Katara, the royal twins of the Southern Water Tribe. They both had lesson after lesson when they were kids. Their every move watched. For Katara, royal life meant that she never had to worry about harsh winters and everyone she’d ever met fawned over her. She had the best training to offer and quickly became a waterbending prodigy. And while, Sokka had the same benefits, it was overshadowed by this one thing: pressure.

Sokka had to take over the SWT when he was of age. He was expected to be a warrior but be gentle. To defend and be kind. He was expected to fix everything after the civil war. To be perfect.

Katara didn’t have to worry about that, all she had to do was set the newest fashion trends and host parties to distract everyone from the aftermath of the war.

Sokka had to give up his chance at a happy life with the love of his life, to wed the Northern Water Tribe Princess, Yue.

Which concludes the second reason why Katara is lucky. Yue is a girl

Chief Hakoda and Chiefess Kya were so happy to know that they were having twins. Double the offspring to use as diplomatic trading cards.  The twins were born in June, during the Southern Winter Solstice. Yue was born six months later, during the Northern Winter Solstice. And mere days after that, the marriage between Sokka and Yue was finalized. Neither had much of a say.

If Yue was born a male, well it would be Katara’s duty instead.

Not that she didn’t understand the importance of such a union. It was the keystone in the treaty that stopped the civil war between the two tribes that controlled the waters for thirty years. It was a horrendous war, one that went on for so long that the people even forgot why they were fighting.

Not Katara though. It was her grandmother, the late Chiefess Kanna, that told her the stories of the war. Of the oppression of the SWT, of how they rose up and fought for their freedom. It wasn’t until the arrangement between Sokka and Yue that the war really stopped. And then, it was only because Kya, her mother, had reached the age to take over the tribe. It was her tactful war plans that caused the North to cease fire. And to finalize it, her mother, who was raised in the war, would do anything to put an end to it. Even forcing her son into an unwanted marriage.  

Katara was very lucky indeed, to not be in her brother’s position. But she couldn’t find it in herself to feel pity for him. Afterall, Yue was a lovely girl. She had a passion for her people, and she was witty and smart. And very beautiful.

But Sokka didn’t get a chance to see any of it.

At first, Katara didn’t get to either. Sokka and Yue were forced to spend a week together every couple of months to enforce good relations. They were forced to have portraits taken of them, stories written about them, that were then spread all over the tribes. Look, they said, if the prince and princess can get along, so can we.

Sokka would return home afterwards and complain and complain about her. Yue was standoffish. She would nod along, even join in on the commentary about her behavior.

Then, Sokka forced Katara to come along for one of his visits and she realized how wrong her brother was. She liked Yue quite a lot. But it seemed that Yue was only herself when there were no men around. Anytime Sokka and her spent time together, they had to have a chaperon, meaning that Yue wasn’t allowed to speak without permission. Sokka had to grant it to her.

Yet another reason why Katara was lucky. She was a girl born of the SWT.

In the North, they had very strict rules in regard to the women. They weren’t allowed to show they face, forced to wear masks to cover their mouths and hoods to cover their heads. It was something that Katara didn’t understand as a little girl, she didn’t have to wear covers so why did Yue? But in time she learned to understand.

But not Sokka. And how could he, when the women he was used to were able to say what they wanted. They could beat him in a fight. His own mother led the whole SWT.

To Sokka, Yue was just a girl who had no personality. Who only wanted to submit, who had no fight or ambition.

But late at night, when Katara would stay over in Yue’s chambers, she would get to know the real girl. The one who did have hopes and dreams, who wanted to travel, who wanted to speak.

Katara tried, once, to tell this to Sokka. But he would always ask why she didn’t just break the rules, Katara did and nothing happened. But Katara wasn’t severely punished the way Yue would have been.

So, she kept her mouth shut—in time, Sokka would learn who the true Yue was eventually. Now, he didn’t even know what she looked like.

Overtime, Yue became one of Katara’s best friends.

She didn’t have a lot of opportunities to have friends. The other nobles in the SWT didn’t really care for her. They pretended, but it was only to gain favor for their family. And it was rare for anyone outside of the South to respect her. The SWT was sort of the laughingstock of the nations and Katara was used to being the butt end of the joke.

She was acquainted with other nobles from the other nations, it was her duty to maintain good relations with them, but she heard their whispers. Once, when she was in the Earth Kingdom, Prince Wu told her to stay away from him, that he didn’t want to be friends with a “Savage Murderer.” It was later that her mother explained to her that the rest of the world did not understand the war. To them, the South attacked the North viscously for purely selfish reasons.

Not everyone had this view, however. The Fire Nation was one of the South’s biggest supporters. At one point in Kya’s life had been threatened, and Fire Lord Azulon offered his home as a safehouse. Kya spent three years in the Fire Nation and became good friends with Prince Iroh. It was him who taught her Pai Sho as well as real war strategies. It was his motivation that allowed Kya to strategically win the war.

Katara could tell that the Fire Nation held them no ill-will. Whenever they visited, their guards didn’t spit at them. And for a while, at least, she had been good friends with Zuko.

She couldn’t say it held true anymore, but at one-point Katara had never felt more at home with anyone other than Zuko.

They weren’t always best friends. When they were younger, whenever the SWT had some diplomatic meetings at the Fire Nation, Sokka would beg to go and Katara would be dragged along. She was just the annoying sister that tagged along with Sokka and Zuko. It wasn’t like she was younger than them or anything, well Zuko was one year older, but Sokka always made it seem like being with her was a chore. Nonetheless, Katara would rather be the unwanted third wheel than one of Azula’s lackeys. Her, Tai Lee and Mai always seemed to get up to no good. They were rude to everyone, even each other.

Then, everything changed at the 73^rd bending games. The twins were around twelve, Zuko thirteen, and they were in the Fire Nation for the games. Katara spent most of her time with Princess Yue, hidden in either of their chambers. Katara and her were working on a secret language using their hands, so that Yue could communicate when they were in public.

Katara had wanted to teach Sokka this language, but Yue asked her not to.

“He just can’t know.” To which Katara had no idea what to say. She felt pity for Yue, being trapped in the arrangement. As soon as they discovered what being betrothed meant, Yue would go on and on about how much she loved Sokka. But Sokka only had negative things to say about her. This made Katara quite upset, her brother didn’t even give Yue a chance.

On the opening ceremony, Yue and Katara decided to try out the language. For the first time since they arrived, the two of them went out in public. Katara in her fancy dress, a modest one that still allowed her to breathe in the heat of the Fire Nation, and Yue in a light dress with a hood and matching mask—both dresses were given to them by Princess Ursa. She was the only one there dressed that way, as Yue’s mother was heavily pregnant at the time, and no other women from the NWT were allowed to attend the games. Katara had to write to Chief Arnook personally to request Yue’s presence.

They mingled with the other nobles and Yue stood quietly beside Katara as she talked. The other nobles knew of the strict rules of women in the NWT, so they never asked Yue any questions. But Katara always kept one eye on Yue, watching her hands move in response to anything she heard. It was only simple stuff, like that’s funny or how annoying but Katara could see the smile in Yue’s eyes. This was the first time she had ever been allowed to communicate in public without a male’s permission. Of course, there would be the more knowledgeable men that gave her permission to speak freely, but the freedom of hand signals was unmatched.

Avatar Aang, for example, was a very sweet old man. (Katara still held a small grudge for him never stepping in while her people were being oppressed and later slaughtered during the war. But her mother always said that they didn’t want the Avatar’s help, and that it was his job to keep peace between the nations, not the nations themselves.) Whenever Avatar Aang interacted with the young girls, he always made sure to grant permission right away. He’d crack jokes and show them cool airbending tricks. Katara liked that he made Yue feel comfortable enough to actually laugh.

The girls had just said goodbye to the Avatar when Prince Lu Ten showed up. He had turned eighteen a few months ago and was granted the right to travel the world as he pleased and hadn’t been home since. His father, Crown Prince Iroh greeted him with tears and every other noble bowed at him as he passed. It was Sokka and Zuko who ran up to them, excitement in their eyes. They both asked him numerous questions about the places he’d seen. It was as if none of the young royals had never traveled before, but it was rare that they could leave the palace of the place they were traveling.

Prince Lu Ten whipped out two knives and presented them to Zuko and Sokka. He’d always had a bit of a soft spot for his cousin’s best friend, but he never gave the same attention to Katara. She didn’t care, after all, Lu Ten gave Azula a doll. Katara had no interest in whatever gift Lu Ten might have given her. Still, Yue signed her annoyance at the situation and Katara couldn’t help but giggle, knowing she would complain about it later in the privacy of her room.

It wasn’t obvious at first glance, but Yue was very opinionated. She disliked a lot of people and things and was often annoyed. But unlike Azula, who rolled her eyes like her life depended on it, Yue knew how to control her face in public. It was only after, when Yue would go on long rants about the little things that upset her. And Katara loved it, she loved knowing that Yue felt comfortable enough around her to express her displeasure.

It was then that she overheard Lu Ten offer to take Zuko with him on his next outing. He said that he had already received permission from the Fire Lord and Prince Ozai. Zuko eyes lit up at the idea. Sokka, who had never been good at concealing his emotions, frowned in jealousy. Upon seeing this, Lu Ten made the same offer to Sokka, as long as his parents agreed. This made Sokka yelp with excitement making Lu Ten smile. He looked up for a moment, and saw the other two Princesses, smiling politely, before turning his attention back to the boys in front of him.

This made Katara’s jaw drop. It wasn’t like her and Yue weren’t standing a few feet away. It wasn’t like they all didn’t grow up together. She looked at Yue, anger in her eyes.

Boys are stupid, Yue signed. (Yes, they came up with those signs.)

“And fucking sexist.” Katara added. Yue surged forward, covering Katara’s mouth, but she couldn’t hide the laughter in her eyes.

Later that night, they added the words “fucking” and “sexist” to their signs.

And because the two of them combined seemed to be able to hold a grudge like no one else, they proceeded to ignore Sokka and Zuko for the rest of the games.

The Bending Games happened every three years. It was created to circulate peace between the four nations in good ole honest fun. Every nation set forth eight tributes, split evenly throughout the nation. The Air Nomads had two tributes from each temple, the Earth Kingdom had one tribute from each of the eight capitals. The Fire Nation had two from the four districts. It wasn’t until the first games after the war ended that the SWT was allowed to have four candidates with the four from the North.

On the first four days, the trials took place. The eight tributes from each nation would participate in the trials to earn the right as one of two Challengers for their Nation. The host of that year’s games went on the first day, and the next in the Avatar cycle went on the following day.

On the fifth day, the real fun began. Each Challenger was given a score based on their performance during the trials, and then were ranked into a tournament bracket. There were only four challenges, one per day, and people came from all over the world to watch the games.

Katara wasn’t particularly fond of the games themselves, but the parties afterwards. The palace opened up to everyone and huge parties were thrown every night. This year, she planned to steal some wine and drink it with Yue. They had a whole plan set in place.

It was the night of the first challenge, meaning the palace ballroom was packed and the alcohol was flowing. Katara slipped off her Ice Crown and ran up to the bartender.

“Excuse me,” Katara cried out, politely but still desperate. “I seem to have lost my crown. But it’s always so secure on my head…I…I think someone stole it!” Katara even waterbent some tears down her face to really sell the story. The bartender looked at her with annoyance. “Please help me find it, my parent’s will kill me if they find out I lost it.”

She even started breathing heavy. The bartender sighed and asked her where she last had it. Katara pointed over to the corner of the ballroom and the bartender walked over with her. She searched with Katara, allowing time for Yue to slip in and grab a bottle, hiding it under the copious amounts of fabric of her dress. Only until Katara saw Yue leave the ballroom, did she slip her crown out of her dress and have it clank behind her.

The bartender saw the crown from behind her and reached out and grabbed it. Katara cried out her thanks, but the glint in the bartender’s eye told her that she was onto her. She fanned a yawn, saying that all the excitement has got her exhausted and she slipped out of the ballroom, following Yue.

She was on her way to the hall where all the royals stayed when she saw Sokka, holding the bottle, and Zuko blocking Yue from her entrance. Katara quickly ran up.

When Sokka saw her, his eyes narrowed. “You stole a bottle of wine?”

“Leave us alone, Sokka.” Katara retorted. She reached out and tried to grab the bottle from him. “Stop it,” she cried out. “You’re going to get us caught,” she whisper-yelled.

“Share with us then,” Zuko demanded.

She let go of the bottle with a sigh and turned to Yue who shrugged. After all, this could be fun.

Luckily, nobody saw two boys enter Princess Yue’s chambers. Once they closed the door behind them, Sokka immediately tried to open the bottle.

“Give it here,” Katara said with a sigh, and she formed a corkscrew with some water from a basin in the room. She lifted the bottle up to her mouth, but Sokka tried to reach for it.

“We should drink it first, we’re older!” Sokka cried out.

But Katara yanked the bottle away and gulped down as much as she could, before coughing. The wine was disgusting, nothing like the taste of juice she was expecting. She then passed the bottle to Yue.

When Zuko went to complain, she said, “Yue was the one who stole it.”

Yue, however, looked at the bottle in hesitance, then back up at the boys, then at Katara.

Katara understood. “Get out,” she pointed to the door.

“No way!” both Sokka and Zuko exclaimed.

I’m fine, Yue signed.

Katara pouted and looked at the boys. “Hey, dummies. Give her permission to speak.” Yue glared at her, but she ignored it. They were in Yue’s guest chambers.  

“We already did, dummy.” Sokka responded.

“Yeah, outside of the bedroom, but now we’re inside the bedroom. You have to give it again when you change rooms.” She rolled her eyes at the end. She couldn’t believe that Sokka didn’t know this.

Sokka’s head tilted in confusion. In was Zuko who said, “Princess Yue, you have permission to speak freely.”

Yue however, only lifted her mask slightly and took a gulp of the wine, then another. Then another. She pulled the bottle away and brought her mask back down and passed the bottle to Zuko.

Sokka tsked in annoyance, but she didn’t know if it was because of Yue’s refusal to speak, or that fact that she gave the bottle to Zuko and not him.

They passed the bottle around in a circle until it was all gone and Katara felt very light and giggly. Her and Sokka were talking about silly things from when they were younger (they felt so old at twelve) and they were all laughing loudly. Even Yue was letting out little giggles.

It was cute.

“We should play a game,” Zuko said. “We should play like spin-the-bottle or something.”

Katara reached over and flicked him on the nose. “How’d that work dummy, I’m not kissing my brother.”

Zuko pouted. “Fine, truth or dare then.”

Sokka nodded. “Yue, truth or dare.”

Yue raised her eyebrow at him. She looked at Katara and signed a D for dare.

“She picked dare,” Katara translated. The boys were either too drunk to notice that Yue had used her hands, or they didn’t care.

“I dare you to take your mask and hood off.”

Yue looked at him with wide eyes. Then shook her head.

“Sokka pick something else,” Katara demanded.

“You can’t back down from a dare, Katara, those are the rules.”

“It’s like asking me to take my clothes off, Sokka, she’s never shown her face to any man before!”

“Fine!” he yelled back. “I dare you to speak!”

Yue flinched at his harsh tone and her eyes filled with tears.

“Sokka! You’re being rude!”

“I’m being rude. I’m not the one who won’t say anything because it’s against the rules. You stole the bottle of wine, Princess Yue, so I know you aren’t the perfect pretty princess you pretend to be!”

Zuko, who had stayed silent during this whole interaction, finally stepped in. “Sokka, that’s enough.”

He opened his mouth to argue back but it was Yue who interupted him.

“Better to remain silent, and thought a fool, then to speak out and remove all doubt.”

It was a quote that Prince Iroh had said once, years ago. Yue had remembered it and often repeated it when Katara told her she should speak more. Katara was just surprised that she would use it now.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Sokka spit out.

“It means that I say nothing, and you say everything, which one do you think is worse?”

Sokka’s mouth dropped, and he got up and stormed out of the room. Yue looked down at her hands, and a tear fell from her eye.

Zuko looked at the two of them, awkwardly. “Well, I guess I should go.”

“Yeah, that’s probably for the best.” Katara whispered, still shocked at the interaction. And Zuko got up to leave.

Hesitantly, Zuko looked at Katara. “You guys don’t hang out with us anymore. You’ve been ignoring us since the opening ceremony.” Katara looked away from him. Now that she thought about it though, she didn’t really understand why they had started ignoring them in the first place. However, after tonight they had a pretty good reason to ignore Sokka.

Once both boys left, Yue pulled off her hood and her mask and proceeded to sob. She quietly asked Katara to leave. Respecting her wish she got up, taking the bottle of wine with her. Yue would have been punished severely if anyone found out what they did that night.

Overall, the 73^rd games did not go well for Sokka. Her and Yue refused to speak to him the whole time, a Master Airbender won over his choice favorite waterbender, and Chiefess Kya told Lu Ten that he would not be able to join Zuko on their voyage—which may or may not be influenced by Katara planting the bottle in Sokka’s room. When Sokka claimed that Katara stole the bottle with Yue, Katara just rolled her eyes. “Can you not come up with a better lie? I have no interest in alcohol.” Kya, on the other hand, was furious with Sokka for pointing the blame at a Lady like Yue. Despite her feelings against the sexist northern traditions, she always respected Yue for upholding their customs.

Sokka didn’t speak to her for a week once they returned home. And Yue stopped gushing to her about how much she loved him.

But Katara thought about that night a lot. Sometimes, she would blush thinking about it. Why would Zuko want to play spin the bottle? Did he want to kiss Yue or her?

And why did he seem upset that her and Yue were ignoring him. To her knowledge, Zuko didn’t have a lot of interactions with the Northern Princess.

It didn’t matter though, Zuko was a complete idiot. An angry idiot and she had no interest in idiots.

But anytime she talked about these strange conflicting feelings she felt for Zuko, Yue would just tease her. “You have a crush on Lord Zuko,” she’d taunt. But Katara would only blush and look away. She didn’t want a crush.

Though, that night did set a foundation. Coincidently, Lu Ten had planned the trip to the SWT when Sokka was in the North for the week visiting Yue. Both Sokka and Yue had begged Katara to come along, but Katara didn’t want to be their middleman. They needed to talk, dammit, and Katara wasn’t going to do it for them anymore.

Which meant, that for the week that Zuko was visiting the South, she would be the only young royal there. Which actually meant nothing at all, because she didn’t have a crush on Zuko or anything. And Zuko definitelydidn’t have a crush on her (and Katara tried to squash down the feeling of despair she felt when she thought that thought.) She was just overthinking a single night.

The Chiefess graciously offered the two Fire Nation Nobles two rooms in the Southern Palace, which meant that Katara would be seeing them every morning for breakfast and every evening for supper. This didn’t matter of course, because Zuko was an acquaintance, a friend even. It was just going to be weird being with him without Sokka.

Katara had to stand with her parents when they arrived to greet them. She bowed politely, but it was the boys that bowed deeper. After all, they were in Katara’s home now, meaning that she ranked higher than both of them. The servants led them both to their rooms and Katara slipped out of the palace to meet up with Master Hama, her waterbending teacher. She couldn’t take the chance of randomly running into Zuko.

She stayed with the woman until supper time, when Hama forced her out. Chiefess Kya would not be happy with Katara’s tardiness to supper, especially since they planned a feast to welcome the Fire Nation boys.

Katara dragged her feet back to the palace and to her room, she changed into a nice dress (a flattering one, for no reason at all) and made it to dinner. When she would walk in, Zuko would stand up to greet her. Just like the gentlemen did in books. He wouldn’t sit down until she did, and they’d make eye contact the whole time.

She thought about this silly little fantasy all the way until she made it to the banquet hall. One of the servants opened the door for her, and she walked in with her head held high and a smile on her face. She was a princess.

But Zuko merely looked up at her and gave her a shy smile. Katara tried hard not to let her disappointment get the best of her. What was she expecting anyway? Zuko didn’t think of her that way.

She went and sat down next to her mother, who was at the head of the table.

Her father, across from her asked, “Where did you go, Katara? You knew we had guests.” His tone wasn’t out right reprimanding her, but his eyes said that she would be later.

“I went to train, with Master Hama.”

She looked at Zuko, hoping he would ask her about it. She’d been known to talk too much when it comes to her waterbending training. It drove Sokka crazy. Now, she was only allowed to talk about it when someone asked.

But Zuko continued eating his food and talking with Lu Ten about their day. Katara really couldn’t deal with this.

She remained silent throughout dinner the first night, returning to her room quickly.

Zuko and Lu Ten were here to explore the sights that the Southern Tribe had to offer, so Katara didn’t see a lot of them. Every night, Zuko would ask her maybe one question at supper, and then none at all the rest of the night.

But each time he talked to her, she felt like lighting rushed through her veins and she’d have to hide her red face.

On the fourth day, Lu Ten had inquired if there was a guide to a certain look out that allowed them to see the Southern Lights. Kya offered up Katara immediately, as it was a place Katara was known to go to often. The look Kya gave her said that she should not refuse.

On the hike up, Lu Ten made a joke that it felt like he was chaperoning a first date.

“It’s not like that!” Zuko huffed. She had almost forgotten how hot headed the boy was.

However, it was a relief lifted off of her shoulders. A definite that Zuko did not return these strange feelings and Katara didn’t even have to ask.

It was during this hike that Katara started to truly voice her opinions on things. The boys would make comments that she would agree with or disagree with, and both of them seemed to be surprised at her answers.

“What, just because I’m a girl doesn’t mean I can’t have opinions?”

Zuko laughed at his. “Believe me, Katara, I am used to girls who have opinions.” Katara smiled at that, he was Azula’s brother, after all.

That did seem to open the dam and Zuko started talking freely with Katara. They talked about everything. Philosophy, politics, things that they enjoy, things they dislike. Lu Ten would chime in every once in a while, when Zuko or Katara would make a point that he disagreed with. He was the one who had finished all of his lessons that Zuko and Katara were still taking.

It wasn’t until Zuko walked her back to her room that night when he said that the Southern Lights were beautiful, but he enjoyed their conversation much more. Katara knew better than to overthink this comment. Zuko said it himself, it’s not like that between them.  

The rest of their visit, her and Zuko talked a lot. She showed him her favorite things to do, restaurants she favored, activities she liked, stores she frequented. And when it was time for him to leave, it was Katara who had asked him to write to her.

Thus, leading to their fast friendship, which never seemed to faulter. They sent letter after letter, exchanged visits. They talked about everything. He listened to all her rants about social injustices. Her rants about how the Southerners were looked down by everyone, not just the North. How even though the South was subtle about it, there was still deep-rooted sexism. How Kya would suggest something, everyone would disagree. But if Hakoda suggested the same thing, it was a wonderful, groundbreaking idea.

It was a solid friendship, one Katara depended on. As they grew older, it was him, Sokka, and Yue that she depended on.

But, once again, that changed on one visit she took to the Fire Nation. She had just turned seventeen and was asked by her mother to serve as a diplomate for some new trade routes that were being proposed by the Fire Nation. Usually, Katara would ask to go along with whoever was sent, but because she was old enough to represent the SWT herself, it was her first solo trip.

It was a busy week, and she had little to no free time, but she and Zuko worked around their crazy schedules to be able to spend as much time as possible together.

When she first saw him, she almost thought he was someone else. He’d finally taken his hair out of that stupid phoenix tail and wore a standard half-up topknot. The rest of his hair flowed down his shoulders, and she had to stop herself from admiring. Zuko looked good.

She ran up and hugged him, missing the feeling of his arms wrapped around her. He pulled away with a smile, and a compliment to her knew hair. She changed the way she styled it, so that she had two braids at the top, in a half-up, with the rest of her hair flowing down in waves. And of course, she left in her hair-loopies.

She looked away blushing and returned the compliment. He then jumped into an explanation of their plans for the night, how there was a play being shown at the theater, and how there were some beautiful stars that were to appear this week.

Katara reminded him that she didn’t know how much free time she’d have, but she’d try and make time for him. He tried very hard to cover up his annoyance, but Katara could see right through it. She always could.

They did end up going to the play and also star gazing afterwards, as well as countless times they just enjoyed each other’s company.

And on her last night, Zuko snuck a bottle of Fire Whiskey, and they met in his room. Katara didn’t have much experience drinking liquor, she’d only drank wine before. But being in the comfort of Zuko and in the privacy of her room, she decided that it wouldn’t be a bad idea to get loose.

They’d drank a good amount, and Katara felt a nice buzz, more than a buzz. She didn’t expect to feel so drunk. Zuko took a large gulp. Then another. Then turned to her with a solemn face.

“Father wants me to join the Military.”

Katara took another swig. “The Military? Why? The four nations have been at piece since the end of our civil war.”

“He says that now is the time to build up our military. If we don’t and someone else attacks, we will be left defenseless.”

“But if you build up your military, and other nations find out, then won’t they get the wrong message?”

Zuko shrugged and grabbed the bottle, taking another drink. They’d drank a little under half of the bottle. Katara took it and set it aside—maybe they should take a break.

With a sigh, she fell back onto the couch they were sitting on. Katara was so jealous that Zuko had his own antechambers. His couch was really nice and soft. Sokka had a couch in his antechambers. But his room was for the Crown Prince. She was just a lowly princess. 

“I’m so glad I’ll never have to lead a country,” she said with a giggle. “Whenever Sokka talks about it, I get a headache.”

Zuko laughed a little. “I definitely do not pity Sokka.” He reached his arm behind the couch and rested his hand beside Katara’s other shoulder. Katara looked over at it, staring blankly for a second. Why do men do that?She’d seen her father and brother do the same thing, but she never tried to spread out like that before. In fact, she usually felt the urge to take up as little space as possible. Hmm, just like Yue.

She blinked herself out of it and turned back to him. “Relations between the North have been pretty rough lately.”

“Honestly, relations between anyone and the North have been pretty rough lately. They seem to think they’re the sole victims of the world.”

“That and publicity between Yue and Sokka is not going to well… Someone leaked that all they do during his visits is sit in silence and everyone is panicking that their relationship is falling apart. I had someone ask me if I thought the Civil War was going to start again. Sokka has had to do some major damage control.”

“Shame for Sokka.” Zuko said.

“Poor Yue,” Katara sighed, at the same time—unfortunately. She turned to Zuko abruptly. But the quick movement of her head made the room spin a little. “What do you mean?” she snapped. Maybe the alcohol was making her defensive.

Zuko immediately put his hands up in surrender. “Well, you know what Yue is like.” Then he shrugged.

She crossed her arms over her chest. “No. Tell me what Yue is like.”

Zuko looked to the side. “She’s… shy. She doesn’t talk much, not like you.”

“She can’t.” Katara grabbed the bottle from the table. She needed to be more drunk to have this argument. She took a drink. (Okay, maybe she chugged it a little.)

“Please, we give her permission. And… it’s not like she doesn’t break other rules. She signs to you all the time, and that is definitely against their customs.” Zuko took the bottle from her and somehow seemed to drink more.

“Well… you guys just don’t know her.”

“You’re right. Because she doesn’t talk to us.”

“Have you even tried to get to know her, ask her questions?”

“Sokka has!”

Katara tsked and crossed her hands.

“Come on Katara, he was raised with Chiefess Kya as a mother and you as a sister,” he slurred. If Katara wasn’t so drunk, she might have noticed that she was slurring her words, too.

Katara furrowed her eyebrows. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means that he likes women with some spunk to them. With fire. Women that aren’t afraid to speak their minds. Like Suki!”

It was a drunken slip and as soon as he said the name, he slapped a hand over his lips.

“Suki? As in the Kyoshi Warrior Suki?”

Kyoshi Island was the southernmost part of the Earth Kingdom. It was where most of the trade took place for the SWT and recently, Sokka had asked to oversee most of the trade. Meaning that he went there a lot. Katara was going to kill him.

“Katara, don’t be mad at him. Doesn’t he have a right to be happy?”

“Doesn’t Yue?”

“That’s not fair.”

She looked down at the ground. If Sokka really didn’t love Yue, then she would understand. But Sokka didn’t truly know her. If only he knew what she was really like. If only he could see how beautiful she was, how witty she was. How smart and passionate. Yue loved deeply and cared deeply, she was angry for the weak and understanding of the poor. Sokka just didn’t know that.

“She loves him, you know. She just doesn’t know how to say.”

“She doesn’t know how to say a lot of things.”

She rolled her eyes at that. Zuko didn’t get it. She could explain it to him, and she’d sure as hell try, but he’d never truly get what it was like.

“It’s not as easy as you make it sound. You try growing up in a society where you can’t speak in front of men. At all. Just because you and Sokka give her permission, doesn’t mean that she hasn’t grown up not having it most of the time.”

He brought both hands up and cradled her face in his palms. The way he looked at her, almost made her feel as if his eyes touched her soul. 

“I’m not saying it’s her fault, Katara. I’m saying that I understand Sokka’s view on the matter.” He tightened his lips and sighed. “Neither of us get it, you know. The pressure of being next in line.”

And to that, Katara had no rebuttal. She just pulled away from his hands, brought the bottle back up to her lips, and took the biggest gulp she could. She was drunk enough that it didn’t burn her throat as much as the first time.

They continued to pass the bottle back and forth, this time facing each other. Zuko would reach out and play with a strand of her hair, sending shocks of electricity down her spine.

“I am grateful to him, you know. Sometimes it feels as though Sokka took all my burdens by being born first. It coulda been me. Or if Yue was a male, it coulda been me…”

Zuko took the bottle and chugged the rest. The bottle was gone, and they were good and drunk. He turned and looked deep into her eyes. “I’m so glad it isn’t.” His hand snuck up and buried itself in her hair.

Katara didn’t really know what was coming over her, but she felt the sudden urge to kiss him, and she felt as if his hand was everywhere on her body.

“Because then… I’d have to be your Suki.”

Katara brought her hand up onto his chest. His pale-yellow eyes bore into hers.

“What do you mean?” And even though they were the only ones in the room, she whispered it.

“I—” he swallowed. “I’m in love with you,” he whispered back.

If Katara were in her right mind, she might not have done what she did. She might have questioned how and when, or if she even returned his feelings. She hadn’t really had a crush on him since she was twelve, dammit.

But Katara was very, very drunk and Zuko’s hand felt like they were burning her in the most delicious way. She wanted to burn all over.

She couldn’t remember who started the kiss, but she did remember standing up. They both swayed a little and the bottle was knocked over, but nothing came out. She could taste its contains on Zuko’s lips. She could feel it in his hands on her hips, pulling her towards him.

She remembered tearing off each other’s clothes on the way to the bedroom. She remembered the lighting he shot through her while he ate her out until she came. She remembered kissing him as he moved inside her for the first time, ever. She even remembered the slight pain and his reassurance that it was okay.

She remembered thinking how happy she was that her first time was with Zuko, who seemed to care about her pleasure as much as his. It was his first time as well, and while he didn’t last long, he made sure to finger her until she came again.

And at the end of it all, she remembered him kissing her on the forehead, and falling asleep wrapped up in his arms.

...

Katara was very lucky, you see. She was blessed with the lack of a hangover. She’d never had one before and had no idea what the big deal was with them. As she woke up, the sun shining through her window, she thought she might have been experiencing one for the first time. Until she realized that it was just soreness. All over.

She bolted up in a panic.

Her and Zuko slept together last night.

And it was amazing.

And he told her he loved her.

Katara looked down at her lover with a smile. She hadn’t allowed herself to feel these feelings about him, but a wave of affection washed over her. Maybe I do love him.

But that didn’t mean she should be caught leaving his room, so she decided to leave now. Better to let him sleep in too, he’d had a long night, and she’d see him at breakfast before her parting anyway.

She slipped out of his bed, collected her clothes, and walked back to her chambers with a smile on her face. Luckily, none of the guards caught her leaving his room, too.

It was a good morning.

Or so she thought. For when she walked into the dining hall for breakfast, with a bright smile on her face, Zuko didn’t even look up at her. He was too busy scowling at his food. It was Princess Ursa who greeted her, and upon hearing her name, Zuko turned and gave her small smile.

She was a little taken aback, but maybe Zuko wasn’t one to show displays of affection in public. Though, if her memory served her correctly, Zuko once dated a girl from the Earth Kingdom and never seemed stop touching her. It had driven Katara crazy.

She smiled at the thought—she didn’t want to admit she was jealous. It didn’t matter now, Zuko loved her.

It was only the three of them, so she made small talk with Princess Ursa until she looked at Katara with a glint in her eye.

“It’s always so lovely to have you in the palace, Princess Katara, I’ve always loved your company.”

Katara looked down and blushed. She was grateful to have Zuko’s mother’s approval. They’d probably see a lot more of her nowadays anyway.

“You’re too kind Princess Ursa.”

“And you’re too modest.”

Katara looked up shyly. She wanted Zuko to say something to her. Compliment her. Anything. He was starting to act like nothing happened the night before.

“I have to ask, while I have the two of you in the same room, alone… Is there anything going on between you two. You’d make an excellent couple.” She said it with a slight smirk and Katara felt like she was being teased.

But before she could answer with a smile, Zuko jumped right in with a frown.

“Mother,” he bit out. “I told you, there is nothing going on with Princess Katara and me, please do not ask again.”

Katara could not believe her ears. Zuko didn’t just say that.

He’d said he’d loved her. Was that a ploy? To get her into his bed? –-No, Zuko wasn’t like that.

She took a sip of juice to hide her face. For whatever reason, Zuko didn’t want his mother to know about them, and Katara would respect that.

Ursa pouted a little. It was the same pout Zuko wore almost all the time.

“I guess it’s for the best,” she said with a sigh. Huh? “I’ve been arranging with Lady Michi from the Husozi district. You remember her don’t you, Zuko?”

Zuko raised his brow. With a sigh he said, “Yes, mother, I remember Mai’s mother.”

Ursa smiled. “Well, we think an arranged marriage between you and Lady Mai would be for the benefit of everyone.”

Huh?

Zuko only clicked his tongue. “You know how I feel about arranged marriages, Mother,” he said dismissively.

Katara could feel her breathing start to pick up and her heartrate increase. Come on Zuko, now would be a pretty good time to tell your mother you’re in love with someone else… like me…

“Please, Zuko, you’re a noble. All nobles have arranged marriages. And Governor Ukano is a very influential man. The marriage would benefit everyone, including yourself. You won’t be able to live at the palace forever… Unless, of course, there is another reason you don’t want an arranged marriage?”

Me. Katara. Princess of the South. You love me, remember?

Zuko tsked. “There is no other reason.” He denied. Katara’s heart cracked. But wait, she must not understand something. “I will think about it,” he concluded, diplomatically.

Her heart cracked again, this time in two, right down the center.

“Great,” Ursa cheered with a smile. “I have also received news that Lady Toph Beifong is expected to visit today, she’ll arrive shortly after you leave Princess Katara, it’s a pity you can’t meet her.”

Katara couldn’t breathe anymore.

“A pity,” she whispered. “I didn’t know the Beifong family had a daughter.”

Zuko laughed. He actually laughed. “I didn’t either, until me and Lu Ten went to an illegal earth rumbling during our visit to Gaoling. Toph beat everyone at twelve, it was truly a sight to see, but we didn’t think much of it. Until we had dinner with the Beifongs and saw her at the table.” He was smiling when he talked. The first time he’d smiled since last night and it was while talking to her about another woman. “We actually helped convince her parents that Toph was much tougher than she looks. She’s blind, you see, so they didn’t even tell anyone that she existed.”

“Wow,” was all she could get out. Lady Mai, Lady Toph. She just lost her virginity the night before, and Zuko can only talk about other girls. 

She wanted to be anywhere but here.

She spent the rest of breakfast without speaking another word and wished her goodbyes to Princess Ursa and Zuko. She excused herself and headed to the Palace gates, to the palanquin that would lead her to her boat. All of her stuff would already be there.

Just before she left, however, Zuko ran up to her and dragged her into a small room.

Finally, she thought. Finally, he’s going to explain that this morning was just a misunderstanding. He’s not thinking about getting married. He just wants to keep things a secret. Katara understands that. She can respect that.

“I’m so sorry, Katara,” he started, sincerely.

“I am, too,” she replied, she was sorry that she judged him and thought that he didn’t care about her. She had been so rude during breakfast.

At her words, he looked relieved. “I—” he started again, “I said some things last night that I shouldn’t have said. Stuff that I didn’t mean.”

Katara’s jaw dropped.

“I just hope that you didn’t take what I said the wrong way or anything and, honestly, that you won’t tell Sokka, please. We can just pretend it never happened.”

“We can just pretend that it never happened.” She repeated. She blinked and then plastered a fake smile on her face. “Of course, it was...” she swallowed. “It was nothing.”

Zuko smiled at her. “Thank Agni, I was worried that you’d be mad at me for last night.”

She bit her lips to keep the smile on her face. “Nope, we’re all good.” She punched him in the shoulder, “Still best friends.” Then she stepped out of the room. “Look, Zuko, I don’t want to keep the crew waiting, I should probably leave.”

“Right, of course. I’ll write to you.”

She waved behind her as she walked quickly out of the palace. “Right. Me too,” she called out behind her. She had to leave, quickly.

It wasn’t until she was in the safety of her own bedroom back at the South Pole that she allowed herself to cry. Not just cry, sob. She sobbed and sobbed until there was nothing left to cry, after afterwards she screamed into her pillow until she started sobbing some more.

She couldn’t tell anyone about that night though. If they knew that she was a ruined woman, her reputation would be in shambles and the SWT would be in for a massive scandal. She couldn’t even risk writing to Yue about it, in case the letter fell into the wrong hands.

So, she pretended like everything was normal.

When she got a letter from Zuko a couple weeks later she read:

Katara,

I finally got my mother off of my case about the arranged marriage. It was Uncle who put a stop to it, really. Can you image me in an arranged marriage? Unbelievable. I look at my parents and I remember my uncle and his late wife… I can’t help but dream of a love like the later.

I always hate the week after you visit, everything seems so dull in comparison. Though, Sokka is coming to visit in a few days. I’m sure you know that he is traveling back up to the North for some damage control and has requested to visit me beforehand. So, I will have him to fill the hole you’re parting as left me.

But my days aren’t going to be too boring. I’ve enlisted in the academy to go through formal military training. Despite being a master firebender already, it really is the best option for me. I won’t be able to live at the palace forever, especially after Lu Ten is coronated. Uncle has confided in me that he doesn’t want the throne, all he talks about anymore is how he exhausted he is. He says that he wants to move to the countryside and open up a tea shop. Can you image?

Grandfather is getting sick, though, so there has been a lot of talk about Uncle being coronated as soon as possible. It makes me sick to think about Grandfather being sick…

Please tell me how you have been doing. You usually write to me once you return home, but I haven’t heard a word from you since you left.

You did say that we’re all good, right? Somehow, I’m paranoid that you don’t actually mean it.

I guess I will have to trust that you have just been extremely busy working as the SWT ambassador.

Best,

Zuko

Once she finished, she stuffed the letter into her drawer. She’d write back later, after she’d gotten over her shock at the situation.

They had been drunk after all, what if Zuko really didn’t mean to say he loved her?

She sighed and pulled out her stationary, drafting a letter to Yue. She hoped that Yue could travel back with Sokka after his visit, she so desperately needed a friend right now.

Yue, of course, wrote back saying that the Chief denied her request, saying that it would be improper for a Princess to travel with her betrothed, and the only other option was to travel alone—which would be equally preposterous.

When Zuko eventually wrote to her again, she didn’t open it, she just stuffed it in her drawer with the other.

Drunk on not, how on earth do you accidentally lie to your best friend and tell her you love her?

…

No matter the ache she felt in her chest when she thought about Zuko, Katara refused to regret her decision. Pretending to be friends with him would only be worse. He still sent her letters, once a week sometimes more, and she never bothered to open any of them.

Most of all, Katara felt dirty.

Deep in her mind, she knew that virginity was a social construct used to oppress women in patriarchal societies. Deep inside she knew she wasn’t really ruined. But she was a Princess, dammit. And Princess were supposed to be virgins. If anyone found out about what she had done…

The South wasn’t openly sexist, but she knew what the North did to brides who weren’t virgins. About a hundred years ago, it had been discovered that a Princess from the North had been sexually active (Katara knew this to be rape, but that term didn’t exist back then.) She had been stripped naked and exposed in front of everyone, tied to a pole in the center of town. She was spit on, pissed on, amongst other things. Her only relief was freezing to death.

This story was used as a horror story for girls, a cautionary tale. The tribes would never do this now… but Katara could not risk telling a single soul. Not Sokka. Not her parents.

Maybe Yue, but communication with her was limited to in-person only. Letters could be read.

Instead, Katara took shower after shower, trying to scrub clean her disgusting mistake. She was a Princess.

She was a Princess; she should have known better. Done better…

It wasn’t until a month and a half passed that Katara realized she was late.

Katara was so royally fucked. Sokka found her curled up on the ground, screaming at the top her lungs, tears streaking down her face. He tried to shake her out of it and eventually got her to stop screaming, but she refused to say a word to him.

“Please fetch Mom.”

Not enough time passed in between when Sokka left and when her mother arrived. Her mother, the ever-loving mother that she was, sat down with her and held her while she cried. She brushed her tears away and assured that everything would be okay. Until Katara opened her mouth.

“Mom. I think I’m pregnant.”

The silence that followed was deafening.

The slap that followed was even more so…

(Later, Chiefess Kya would apologize profusely. Later, she would explain that while she didn’t agree with the patriarchal view of virginity and women, that didn’t mean that Katara, as a princess, was not still bound to it.)

Katara had never seen such a look of disappointment on her father’s face, only made worse by her begging them not to tell Sokka.

“A parka only hides so much, Katara,” said her father.

“I’ve called for Healer Hiyoka, we should confirm if this is true as soon as possible,” said her mother.

“You aren’t pregnant,” said Healer Hiyoka.

She then explained that it was most likely stress that caused her cycle to be so late. And her parents’ look of relief made her sick.

So, she told them for nothing. Well, maybe not nothing.

“Chiefess Kya,” the healer addressed, “It is custom that we do the branding.”

The Branding. Katara’s stomach twisted up in knots. A tradition that the South kept from the North. A subtle way of oppression. Traditionally, the word whore would be branded on her thigh. The South, in an attempt to progress as a society, changed the word to pure.

It was a purification process, you see—a way for Katara to redeem herself.

“Absolutely not.” Her mother looked upset at the even idea of it. She would be saved.

“Kya, let’s think about this.” Chief Hakoda placed his arm on his wife’s shoulder, comforting her. Why was he comforting her? “When Katara gets married someday, if it is discovered that she is not…” he grimaced. “If there is no branding, then our family will be ruined. Our tribe will be ruined.”

Kya’s eyes filled up with tears. “You don’t believe that.”

“You know I don’t. But that doesn’t mean others don’t either.”

The Chiefess pierced her lips, and both parents looked down at her in pity. The South was already viewed as lawless savages…

Katara turned her face away from them. She felt… she didn’t even know how to feel right now.

Her father leaned down and kissed her head before leaving to give them privacy. But any chance of keeping her dignity left when Healer Hiyoka began removing Katara’s pants. She didn’t dare move a muscle.

The branding was done on the left thigh, as close to the pubic area as possible. The point was that Katara could go on living her life as she wished, but as soon as she bed a man and spread her legs, the brand would be revealed. And it was in a very sensitive place on the body, a place that wouldn’t heal quickly. Katara would feel this brand anytime her legs were closed.

It was her mother, with tears in her eyes, who held Katara’s left leg down so the healer could work. The Healer would waterbend one drop of water against Katara’s skin, and then freeze it, causing an ice burn. This was repeated, over and over again, until the word pure was spelt out. The process was excruciating, was supposed to be excruciating, worse than a burn from fire, but Katara refused to cry out. That didn’t stop her tears from falling freely.

Kya looked away the whole time. Not at the healer or the branding, not at Katara’s face.

At the end, Katara was allowed to rest in bed for as long as she needed. She wasn’t allowed to heal it, but by Southern customs she was now pure once more. Food was brought to her, the only times she got up were to use the restroom. Getting up was painful, walking was worse. Any movement caused her skin to rub on the burn.

Only two days had passed when Sokka had come to find her. He sat by her bed with a soft smile on her face.

“Hey sis, you doing, okay? You haven’t left your room in days.” Katara smiled, her parents didn’t tell him.

“I’m… I’m fine.”

Sokka looked at her, studying her. He didn’t believe her, but he wouldn’t push. He never did. “I have some news…” Katara looked at him, giving her full attention. “Fire Lord Azulon is dead.”

Her eyes widened; her jaw dropped. Zuko. She couldn’t imagine the pain he was in.

But wait. Katara was in literal, physical pain right now. All because of him. She closed her eyes and looked away.

“Zuko wrote to me. Prince Iroh has requested that there be a separate funeral just for family, but he asked us to be there, to support him.”  

Katara squeezed her eyes, forcing them shut. They would be full of tears if she had any left.  

“I don’t want to go,” she whispered.

“You don’t want to go support your best friend as he grieves his grandfather?”

“He’s not my best friend anymore.”

Sokka blinked at her. “Are you kidding me right now? Whatever fight you and him got into during your visit is not worth this. Are you really going to turn your back on Zuko now? When he’s grieving?”

“I’m sick.” Katara settled on. “You can tell him I’m sick when you go. He should at least have you to support him.”

And so Sokka went alone to the Fire Nation. Katara didn’t know how it went or how Zuko was because she didn’t ask and Sokka didn’t tell her.

…

Katara didn’t really see Zuko until four months after her branding. She went to Fire Lord Iroh’s coronation, but she made sure to avoid him at all costs. She spent all her time with Yue.

It was only a couple of days, but talking with Yue helped a lot. She was probably the only person who would truly understand Katara, maybe even more so. While Yue had never been branded herself, the North was very loose with their punishments. They were cruel punishments that were given often.

The best part about talking with Yue was knowing that she wouldn’t tell anyone. She couldn’t really, and she wouldn’t either. It wasn’t like Yue and Zuko had a relationship anyways, so it’s not like he’d notice when she’d glare at him from across the room. The only worry she had was Sokka, but Yue assured her that Katara’s secret was safe with her.

After her return back to the SWT, she realized the branding wasn’t her only punishment. She was no longer asked to serve as SWT Ambassador, not just to the Fire Nation, but anywhere. She wasn’t allowed to travel alone.

She was lonely.

Her only companion these days was Sokka, but he wasn’t the happiest with her right now. The feeling was mutual, as he seemed to spend all his free time in Kyoshi Island.  Katara could not believe it… did her parents really not know about Suki?

And Sokka was getting married in a year’s time. The double standards were disgusting.

Katara still got letters from Zuko. Well, they’d died off a bit, but three weeks ago, he had sent one last one. She couldn’t bear to read any of them, not when it seemed like her whole life was ruined.

Still, she knew what the last one was about. Prince Lu Ten had been assassinated. There was an investigation going on, but there was no luck in finding who murdered him.

There was to be a public funeral, one that Katara was forced to attend. She pouted the whole journey to the Fire Nation, but at least she wasn’t limping with every step like last time.

When they made it to the palace, the Southern family was escorted to their rooms immediately. This was the first time she had never been greeted by the royal family. But that was to be understood, Iroh hadn’t left his bed in days.

They were to be served dinner before the funeral, which would take place at dusk. On the way to the banquet hall, Katara and Sokka ran into Yue and Porak and his governess. Unfortunately, Yue’s mother had passed in childbirth, but Chief Arnook was very happy to have a male heir before her passing.

Yue greeted her with a hug, she seemed to understand how hard it was to be here. Porak ran up to Sokka with excitement. Yue pulled away from her and she could see the look of annoyance shining through her eyes.

Porak has decided that he likes Sokka now. She let out a soft sigh, during his last visit, Sokka only spent time with Porak. It was humiliating. Katara frowned and looked down at Sokka, who was squatting to meet the five-year-old’s height. They seemed like they were doing a secret handshake.

Together, the four of them made it to dinner and found their seats at the long table. Maybe it was because enough time had passed, or just because she hated herself, but Katara’s eyes wondered throughout the people, searching for Zuko. But he was nowhere to be found. Instead, at the usual spot where Zuko sat was a man with a shaved head. The hair had started to regrow, but it was still very short.

Fire Lord Iroh gave a speech, showing gratitude for everyone who came to show their support for them and giving a small toast to Lu Ten. While Katara herself wasn’t close to Lu Ten, Sokka was. And with the tears pouring down Iroh’s face, Katara couldn’t help but feel the immense sadness surrounding them.

Throughout dinner, Katara kept looking up at the door to see when Zuko would walk in. It wasn’t like him to miss this. But dinner finished, and Zuko still wasn’t there.

It had been a while since she’d seen him, he probably wasn’t the person she remembered.

And oh, how true that turned out to be. As she sat in the crowd and looked up at the royal family as they gave Lu Ten a proper send off, her eyes saw the face of the man with the shaven head.

It was Zuko.

But he didn’t look like Zuko. His face had been mutilated as a huge burn mark was stretched across his face. She felt her heartbeat in her left thigh.

Katara looked down at her hands the whole ceremony. She felt so very sick. What had Zuko been through these past months? Had she abandoned him?

She had been angry for so long… it seemed impossible to think he was hurting at the same time.

So, even though it was very late at night, and Katara was exhausted from a long journey and Zuko was probably not in the mood, she tracked him down, meeting him at his bedroom door.

When he saw her, his eyes widened in shock for a moment, before his face twisted in a scowl.

“What are you doing here?”

Katara took in the man before her. Gone was the gentleness in his eyes, the fondness he used to look at her with. The burn on his face looked fresh, like it had just started to heal. But Katara knew there would be a scar there for the rest of his life.

“It’s new.” She said, gesturing to his face. He frowned. “What happened? Why… why didn’t you tell me?”

Zuko looked at her for a few seconds, confusion on his face. Then he laughed, hard. The sound filled the hall. But it wasn’t joyous laughter, it was eerie and made her sick.

“I would have come to you,” she added, which seemed to sober Zuko up immediately.

“That’s hilarious, Katara. You would have come to me.” He sighed and shrugged. “Well, it’s nice to know that my best friend didn’t abandon me knowing what was going on. In fact, she didn’t even bother to read the dozens of letters I sent her. I’m reassured.” Zuko rolled her eyes and moved to get through his door. Katara stopped him.

“Wait, Zuko. I—”

“I don’t want to hear it! For six months, all I’ve wanted was to hear from you. And now? I am so done. You couldn’t possibly understand what I’ve been through! How much pain I’ve been in!”

Katara scoffed. “Oh really. I couldn’t possibly understand your pain, Lord Zuko. As if I haven’t been through a lot, as if I haven’t been in pain!”

“It’s Prince, now.” Katara could have screamed. “And what could possibly compare to getting burned on your face by your own father!”

It was like every emotion Katara had bottled up these last months rushed all at once. Tears filled and poured out of her eyes. Of course he wouldn’t understand, he might have said over and over again, that he understood how hard it was to be a woman… he’d never get it. Sex to him wasn’t even that big of a deal, apparently.

“How about your mother holding you down while you get branded,” she whispered. She couldn’t let anyone else hear. “Because you had sex with a man who tricked you into his bed by making you think he loved you.”

Zuko’s eyes widened. “You…” he trailed off. Zuko had the audacity to look… hurt. But then he scowled once again, pushed her aside and stormed off into his room.

Katara let out an earth-shattering scream, before storming back to her chambers. She didn’t seek him out the rest of her time in the Fire Nation.

When she returned back to her tribe, she went to her room and opened the drawers and looked at all the unsealed letters of Zuko that she’d kept.

She closed the drawer with a huff.

Chapter Text

There was a time when Sokka would have said no one understood him like Katara. When they were kids, they didn’t need to speak in order to understand the other. They’d play together, get in trouble together, eat, sleep together. Inseparable. No one knew Katara without him, and he didn’t know himself without Katara.

But then he found out what betrothed meant. He’d always known that he was betrothed, he just didn’t think that meant marriage. If he were to point a finger at any one thing that ruined his relationship with Katara, it was his arranged marriage.

At first, Katara seemed upset because it meant that Sokka and her would be separated someday. Then, it was because Sokka had to go visit his betrothed at least once a year. Then, Katara presented as a waterbender, and she had to go train.

Things always seemed to be pulling them apart.

At first, Katara didn’t care about Yue. She didn’t know her and so she would listen to Sokka complain about the girl without comment.

And boy was there lots to complain about. Yue didn’t have a personality. Sokka had never met a kid who he didn’t get along with. Yue would just stare at him blankly through strange purple eyes most of the time. He’d ask her a question and she’d just look at him, waiting, expecting.

It wasn’t until later did he realize that he had to give her permission to speak. But even when he did, Yue didn’t have a lot to say. She’d answer his questions maybe sometimes respond with one of her own. (He did remember the awe he felt at hearing her first words. Her voice was angelic.)

He didn’t know what she looked like because she was always covered. She was always looking at her chaperon with uncertainty. He didn’t know what she thought because she never spoke.

He was engaged to a brick wall. And he was only nine!

There was a moment though, a single moment, that Sokka saw a different person.

Sokka had asked for a tour of the palace, and so Yue had led him to different places and gave him a short introduction of each. In truth, Sokka didn’t really care about the palace, but this was the most Yue had ever spoken before. He was in awe, staring at her as she spoke with such eloquence.

When they made it to the training grounds, Sokka was intrigued by the weapon room. They were different than Southern weapons. He leaned into Yue’s ear and asked, “Do you trust me?” He couldn’t see her cheeks, only the sliver of skin where her hood and mask didn’t cover her purple eyes, but he swore he could see her blush. He took her hand, and together they ran.

They ran through the hallways of the palace, Yue’s chaperon chasing them, until Yue said that she knew a secret passageway. Somehow, they gave the chaperon the slip and snuck back into the weapons room and locked the door.

Yue laughed when they made it to the room. It was the most beautiful sound that Sokka had ever heard.

Sokka looked around the room, picking up some weapons and trying them out. He had been training with his father for a while now and knew what he was doing. He then looked over at Yue, who was sitting on the ground, looking at him intently.

“Do you know how to fight? You can speak.” He tacked that on at the end for good measure.

Yue laughed again, but it wasn’t as pretty. It wasn’t humorous.

“If a girl could fight, do you think we’d still be wearing these masks? It’s forbidden.”

Sokka didn’t really understand what she meant, but he did know that women in the North were forbidden from fighting. He didn’t understand that though either: Katara was the best waterbender in the South. It was only a matter of time before she became one of the youngest masters of all time.

“You can take that off, you know?” Sokka said, gesturing to her mask.

“It’s forbidden.”

Sokka rolled his eyes. Did this girl not know that she had free will? She could break the rules.

“Get up,” he commanded. She listened immediately. “I want to teach you how to fight.”

Yue looked up at the door, hesitantly, but it was locked, and no one was coming. She nodded.

“It will be easier to fight without your mask. You can’t see anything.”

“I’ll be fine.”

Sokka shrugged. He taught her how to form a good stance, the basics of blocking. He had just gotten to teaching her how to throw a good punch when there was a banging on the door.

Yue looked at him with wide eyes full of panic. He held his finger up to his lips, silencing her.

The person behind the door called out for her and banged on the door again. Still, they remained silent. Yue, though, had silent tears streaming down her face. Had Yue never gotten in trouble before?

Then, the door was broken down and in walked in Chief Arnook and a handful of palace guards.

Chief Arnook looked at Yue with more fire in his eyes than the whole of the Fire Nation. She flung herself on the ground and bowed to him.

“Father, I am so sorry!” she pleaded, immediately.

“Silence!” he yelled.

One of the guards sneered at her. “I thought your daughter could control her tongue.”

“Escort her to her room. Princess Yue, I will meet you in your chambers,” he said, dismissively. Yue got up, slowly, and the guard grabbed her shoulder, roughly.

“You caused the palace quite a bit of trouble, Princess…” the guard said as he escorted her away.

Sokka was left alone with the Chief. “Sir,” he bowed his head, “It was my fault, my idea. She was just going along with it.”

The Chief only laughed, “Please, don’t underestimate the hold a girl has on a boy, Prince Sokka. Yue knows better than to run away from her chaperone. Being alone with a boy, and her betrothed, too. She will be checked tonight.” He laughed again, so Sokka knew it couldn’t be that big of deal. “You are not my son, so I shall not punish you. I will request that Chief Hakoda deal with you properly.”

The Chief looked at him in a way that told Sokka to leave, now. He went and found his own Southern guard and they quickly left the North. Sokka wasn’t even allowed to say goodbye to Yue.

In all honesty, Sokka didn’t think much about the situation. He’d gotten in trouble for breaking the rules before and it was never that bad. Sometimes he was forced to do things he didn’t want to, but for the most part he was fine. A part of him rolled his eyes at Yue’s reaction. The Chief didn’t even seem that upset to him. He only said the Yue would be “checked,” whatever that meant.

But he couldn’t stop thinking about her. Yue. It felt like he’d been introduced to someone new. Someone with passion, who was almost witty. And her laugh…

He’d do anything to make her laugh again. He even found himself… looking forward to seeing her again. Who was he?

But when he did see her again, she was worse than before. She wouldn’t even look him in the eye anymore. He’d make joke after joke, but she’d never laugh. She spoke when asked a question but nothing more. He didn’t understand, he thought they were finally making headway on their relationship.

After that, Sokka would ask Katara to join him. He thought it was a good idea at first, another girl might make Yue come out of her shell. But it ended up being him and Katara talking with Yue in the room.

Worse was, Katara was able to be alone with Yue. And Yue actually talked to her! Katara started to say things like “I don’t understand why you don’t like her, Yue is so witty”, “Yue is so funny”, “She is so pretty.”

So, she could open up to his sister but not her? Was showing your personality against the “rules.” Could she not break them? No, Yue was perfect. That’s what her mother said, at least. “Yue makes the best out of her situation.”

And thus, his relationship with Katara was ruined. Sokka was no longer her main confident, her partner in crime. He was the boy who didn’t understand the block of ice with no personality. He was now the villain to Yue’s story.

It was around this time, however, that Sokka started to become very curious about the other nation’s fighting styles. His father was very excited about this, and they sent him to the best swordsman in the Fire Nation.

It was there, in Shu Jing, where Sokka met Zuko. He was a year older than him and learning to master the broad swords. It was just coincidence that Sokka was there at the same time as him and they seemed to hit it off perfectly.

They both stayed at Master Piandao’s castle for four months. They woke up together, ate together, trained together. They would fight against each other. Zuko would win, then Sokka, then Zuko, then Sokka again. They’d sneak off and explore the city.

After a month or so, Zuko told him about his sister Azula. He asked to learn how to sword fight when Azula accelerated in firebending at a faster pace than him. Zuko wanted to be great at something, better than Azula. Sokka understood, Katara was always getting congratulated at being a good waterbender, she was better than him. Or, she used to be, Sokka liked to think that they were probably on the same level now.

In turn, Sokka opened up about Yue. It wasn’t a secret that they were engaged, but all anybody saw was the fake stories told and the happy portraits they posed for.

Being friends with Zuko was like being twins with Katara before Yue. He had someone who understood him. And by the end of four months, Sokka was begging to go visit the Fire Nation as much as possible.

It was like this for a while. Katara had Yue and Sokka had Zuko. He didn’t mind—he tried not to mind. Yue was his betrothed, sometimes he wondered if Katara was secretly in love with her.

But seeing Yue and Katara grow closer and closer took a toll on him. He’d hear about things about Yue from Katara. “This is what Yue thinks about…” “This is what Yue said the other day…” “Yue made this joke, and I laughed so hard water came out of my nose.”

It wasn’t like Sokka didn’t try! He had tried!

He had tried to get to know her, ask her questions. But talking with her was like pulling teeth. He carried everything. And now, she would only talk to Katara. It was like Sokka wasn’t even there sometimes. It was like Sokka was the ice block, the third wheel.

Katara had even started to tag along with him when he’d visit the Fire Nation. She’d follow him and Zuko around everywhere. He’d tell her that she could go hang out with Azula and her friends, but Katara would stick her tongue out and refuse to move. It was embarrassing to watch, too. It wasn’t like Zuko particularly liked Katara anyways. He didn’t dislike her; he didn’t say anything about her really. Whenever Sokka complained about his annoying sister, Zuko nodded along. He got it. He always got it.

But it was the 73^rd bending games that changed it all. Katara was spending all her time with Yue, much to their advantage. No pesky girls dragging them down. They were free to do whatever they wanted.

He voiced it one night, the night of the opening ceremony. “It’s so nice not to have Katara following us around like a lost polar puppy.”

Zuko only shrugged. “I don’t know, I kinda wish she’d come out and spend some time with us.”  

Sokka couldn’t believe his ears. “Huh?”

He shrugged again, “She’s funny.” He turned his face away, but Sokka could still see him blush. Ugh.

Sokka rolled his eyes. “And cute,” he said sarcastically. Still, he knew Zuko would always have his back.

All the nobles were mingling together, killing time until the ceremony, when the two Water Tribe Princess finally left their rooms. Whispers about their appearance spread throughout the crowd, they hadn’t partaken in any of the activities leading up to the ceremony.

Sokka saw them from across the room, talking to some of the other nobles. Yue did something funny with her hands and Katara laughed.

He got Zuko’s attention and pointed at his sister and betrothed.

“Oh perfect! They’re here.” He smiled, but Sokka grabbed him, stopping him from going up to them.

“Wait, let’s just watch them from a far.” Zuko gave him a questioning look but shrugged again.

It didn’t take long for Sokka to figure out what was happening. Yue was communicating with her hands. And it boiled under his skin. He was pretty sure that Northern girls weren’t allowed to communicate at all and that this was definitely against the rules.

And… why didn’t Yue do this with him. They’d found a way for her to speak freely, but they didn’t include him…

Even after the arrival of Lu Ten and the possibility of travelling the world, Sokka could not be cheered up. The whole concept was stupid, and it pissed him off.

The next couple of days, Katara and Yue seemed to avoid them at all costs. And when they were in the same room, they’d just speak with their hands and giggle. But Sokka couldn’t care less. His betrothed didn’t care about him, so why should he care about her. But every sign they made was fuel to the fire burning inside him.

What blew his lid, though, was not the signing. It was running into Yue after she stole a bottle of wine.

Even Perfect Princess Yue made exceptions to the rule. Not for him, but for her and Katara’s benefit. It made him furious just thinking about it.

He felt bad about what he said to her that night, he did. But he wouldn’t apologize, not until Yue apologized for the last five years!

He’d had a chance, you know, to learn the sign language they’d created. Katara asked him if he wanted to learn, but he just shoved her. “I don’t want to learn your stupid finger language!”

In his defense, he was still mad at Katara for framing him over the wine. Maybe he deserved it, but that meant the missed out on all of Zuko’s traveling with Lu Ten.

That wasn’t all he’d missed out on. Zuko’s visit to the South for the first time. He didn’t think he was a very angry person, but his visit to the North was spend in silent fuming. He and Yue spend almost all of their time in silence. She didn’t even ask him what was wrong…

She really didn’t care about him. It was so obvious that something was bothering him. Why didn’t she just ask? Why doesn’t she care?

And, of course, it just so happened that leaving Katara and Zuko alone for the first time meant that they’d hit it off. Katara was all of the sudden talking about Zuko like he was Agni himself.

Everything changed after that. Zuko and Katara became best friends.

He couldn’t believe it, he should have seen it coming, but he didn’t believe it. Everyone loved Katara more. Everything came so easy to her. Everyone fawned over her. Sokka was always told to man up, be better, be stronger. He had to fix the water tribes, he had to bear the weight of the future.

It wasn’t fair. Nothing was fair.

But it didn’t feel right being mad at Zuko for it and under his jealousy, he was really happy for Zuko. He was so in love with Katara, it was sickening. It did make him grateful… Katara never said it, but Sokka just knew she loved him too. Someday, Katara would be very happy with a very good man. She’d always be taken care of, Zuko wouldn’t let anything happen to her.

He'd just wished he could have his own story, someone who actually loved him.

It was on his trip to Kyoshi Island when he met her. At fifteen, he was shadowing his father, who was overseeing some trade deals. She was in training room, leading a lesson with young children. Her face was covered in white make-up, and she was wearing a long dress. Even though she was only doing basic moves as demonstration, he was mesmerized with her.

After that first visit, he requested to be the overseer for all future business with Kyoshi Island. He wanted to learn how to fight like that.

In a moment of free time while on the Island, he’d stumbled upon a group training.

“What are you doing here, Stranger?” The leader asked. It was the same one he’d seen before.

“I am Prince Sokka of the Southern Water Tribe, and I have come to ask about your fighting style.”

Some of the girls giggled at his introduction, some blushed and fawned. Sokka wasn’t unused to be fawned over by girls. He’d been told that he was very attractive.

The leader had no reaction but a roll of her eyes. “We are the Kyoshi Warriors, we take after Avatar Kyoshi’s fighting style. It’s mostly defensive, we use our opponent’s energy against them with our fans.” She said all this very monotone, like she was bored. “There, is that all? You’re interrupting our practice.”

Sokka bowed and left, ignoring the girlish squeals made when he walked out.

The next day, he interrupted their practice once more.

“What are you doing here, Prince Sokka of the Water Tribe?” The leader only raised her eyebrow, she seemed fed up with him. “I hope you don’t plan on making a habit of interrupting our practice.”

This time, Sokka bowed. “I have come to ask you to train me. I have always been interested in the other nation’s fighting styles and would like to learn yours.”

There were a few giggles from some of the other girls, but the leader remained quiet. But Sokka didn’t raise from his bow.

“We don’t teach boys.”

This shocked him. He raised his head. “That is… very unusual.”

“What? Not used to not getting everything you want because you’re a man?” The leader snarked.

“No! I’m not… I’m not like that. I’ve just never…” but then he thought about it. This was the first time he hadn’t gotten something because he was a man. (Well, except for the right to choose who he wanted to marry.) “You’re right,” he agreed. “I shall respect your tradition.” He got up, picking up his pride with him, then laughed. “My sister is gonna get a real kick out of this one.” He turned and headed for the door.

“Princess Katara?” the leader called after him. “She is a very admiral fighter.”

“You know my sister?”

The leader scoffed. “Everyone knows your sister, she’s the youngest person to ever master waterbending.”

Sokka smiled, proudly. “Yeah, she’s a better fighter than I am…” he trailed off with a laugh. It’d been a while since he could beat her in a fight.

The leader tilted her head and squinted her eyes. “You’d have to follow all of our traditions. You’d have to wear a dress and make-up and everything.”

Sokka laughed. “If you think I am not secure enough in my manhood to wear makeup and a dress, then you must not know Katara that well. She raised me good.”

Countless talks of toxic-masculinity would do that to a guy. And he didn’t begrudge her for it. Sokka felt that he had a good understanding of who he is as a man and who Katara is as a woman. It helped that his mother was the primary leader of the South, his father technically only being a consort.

The leader smiled at him. “I’m Suki, I will be your trainer Prince Sokka,” she’d said with bow.

And that is how he found himself training with the Kyoshi Warriors every time he’d have business there.

He was being honest when he said that training was the only thing he’d wanted. At first. But something changed the more he’d spend time with the girls. He’d started to eat with them in his free time, he’d started gossiping with them, laughing with them. It was probably bad for his ego, no matter how bad the joke was one of them would always laugh. One girl, Loyah, would always laugh at what Sokka said. She later admitted to laughing at Sokka’s stupidity not his jokes. He’d still take it.

But it wasn’t until Loyah and her boyfriend broke up that the two became close friends. She caught her boyfriend cheating on her and came to practice all puffy-eyed. Sokka pulled her aside and listened to her. She said she loved him, and he was sorry. She wanted to forgive and move on with their relationship. Sokka told her that she could still forgive him and let go of their relationship at the same time.

After that, they became thick as thieves. It was Loyah’s idea to throw Sokka a birthday party when he turned sixteen.

Sometimes he’d have solo training sessions with Suki. She taught him how to redirect energy, how to do other things besides attack. At one point, Sokka brought his sword, and they sparred each other with the different styles.

Suki thought it was very admiral that he studied multiple styles and often said that with his open mind, he’d make a good Chief.

Sokka should have stopped it, he didn’t mean to get so attached… but something about Suki drew him in. Maybe it was because he could see her without make-up, and she was beautiful. Maybe it was because she actually talked to him…

But no, it was more. Sokka found that he wanted to spend more and more time with her. It was dangerous, he knew, but he always told himself that it was the training, that he was drawn to all the Kyoshi Warriors.

It was Suki who had asked him out on a date. He didn’t realize that it was a date at first, it wasn’t until they were up on a mountain, stargazing, that he realized. They were laying down on a blanket that she’d packed along with dinner. Suki reached out and grabbed his hand, turning her head to look at him.

He closed his eyes. The world was so cruel. He turned to face her with a sigh, “I have to tell you something,” he whispered.

“It can wait,” she responded and leaned in to kiss him.

It wasn’t his fault, he’d tell himself. She kissed me.

But Sokka didn’t stop it, it felt so nice to be loved, to be kissed. To have someone hold your hand, initiate affection. To be wanted.

The kiss was soft, Suki’s lips were so soft. Sokka brought his hand up to her hair, running his hand through her strands and gripping her head.

He wished he could’ve said that he pulled away, that he realized this was wrong, but that would be a lie. Suki pulled away with a smile and squeezed his hand.

“I really like you, Sokka,” she whispered. And Sokka was thrust back into reality.

“Suki, I have a fiancé.”

At first, her brows furrowed like she couldn’t understand what he was saying. He sat up with a sigh, his friendship with Suki was too good to be true.

She sat up next to him, abruptly, and punched him in the jaw, knocking him back down. She then got up with a huff. “I can’t believe that I thought you were different!” She yelled as she started walking down the mountain.

“Wait,” Sokka yelled after her. “It’s an arranged marriage, okay? I don’t love her.”

Suki stopped and turned around.

“It doesn’t matter, Sokka, you’re engaged. And yet you still went on a date with me!”

Sokka sat up again, wincing at the pain from his jaw.

“Maybe I just wanted to know what it was like to be wanted and to actually want someone.” He knew how pathetic it sounded, but it was true. “I’m sorry, Suki. I shouldn’t have kissed you, I just wanted to be loved.”

Suki looked at him with pity. Then came and sat down next to him again.

“I’m sorry, too. You tried to tell me before I kissed you.” Sokka didn’t respond, he just looked out at the village below them. If Sokka was born here, he might have been able to love Suki. He might have been allowed happiness. “Will you tell me about her,” Suki asked. The questioned shocked him. He didn’t even know what to say.

“She’s quiet.” He sighed. “Well, I don’t really know what she’s like to be honest.”

“Have you visited her often?”

He let out a humorless laugh, “Every couple of months, I go and spend a week there.”

“How long have you been doing this?”

“Since I was eight.” Sokka had never had a girl ask him so many questions before. He was used to talking, but he’d never truly felt that Yue wanted him to talk. He mostly just did it to fill the silence.

“So, you’ve seen her a lot then? I wonder…” Suki was also looking down at her hands. “I wonder if she’d truly make you happy.” Then she tsked. “I cannot believe I just said that about your fiancé, I am so sorry, that was so—”

“She won’t.” Sokka interrupted. “She won’t even talk to me. She… She can’t!” Suki looked at him, waiting for him to elaborate. “It’s Princess Yue, from the Northern Water Tribe.”

Understanding showed in her eyes. “I’ve heard about what they do to women in the North.”

“It’s different, though, Suki. I’ve seen her break the strict rules of her ‘tradition’ before. She breaks them with Katara all the time. She just chooses not to with me. She won’t make me happy, and I certainly can’t make her happy. Our marriage is doomed.”

“Then why keep it? Why not tell your family that you’d rather…”

“Because our marriage is the peace treaty between our Tribes. Who knows how anyone would react if one of us called it off… I have to do this for my tribe.”

Suki looked directly in the eyes. “If you don’t love each other…, would it really be wrong to…” she trailed off.

It was still wrong, they both knew that. But Suki’s eyes sparkled in the moonlight and her lips were so inviting, and Sokka just wanted to be loved once more…

…

Their relationship was a secret, but Sokka still told Zuko. He couldn’t help it, Zuko was still his confident, he’d always had his back.

To say that Zuko was furious with him was an understatement. It was the first time they’d ever gotten into a real fight. It was almost fair. Zuko had his firebending and dual swords, Sokka had his sword and his fan.

They fought for hours until Zuko pinned him down with Sokka’s own sword against his throat. Zuko cursed at him before dropping the sword. That didn’t stop him from punching him in the face. He was lucky that Katara was there to heal his nose. Though she gave them a long lecture about being more careful when they sparred.

Later that night, Zuko came to his room and invited him to the palace gardens. Together they stole a loaf of bread from the kitchens and made it to the turtleduck pond. It was something that they’d do when they were kids, but Sokka was sixteen now, they hadn’t been kids for a while.

They passed the loaf back and forth and rotated between taking bites and tossing pieces to the turtleducks.

“Tell me about her,” Zuko said. It’s what Suki asked him about Yue. He shoved his guilt down, why shouldn’t he be able to be happy, if not for a little while.

And so, he told him all the amazing things about Suki. Suki talked with him, she was an excellent fighter, she was engaging, she opened up, she listened, she was beautiful. Suki was smart, she could play Paisho with him and win.

“Have you ever asked Yue to play Paisho?” Zuko asked.

Sokka frowned. “This isn’t about Yue.”

“Really, because it sounds like Suki is everything you think Yue is not.”

Sokka took a piece of bread and threw it in the pond. Two turtleducklings swam to it and started snapping at each other to get the bread. He threw another piece, but it took a while for one of them to realize there was another, less soggy piece of bread.

“I don’t agree with this, Sokka.” His frown deepened, Zuko had never been so definitively against him.

Sokka leaned back on his hands and sighed. “I just want to be happy, Zuko. Is my birthright worth my happiness? Is my tribe?”

Zuko laughed silently. “I understand. My mother and father keep bringing up the idea of an arranged marriage for me. But I…” he trailed off, but Sokka didn’t need him to finish.

“You love my sister,” he sighed. He’d long ago accepted it. Zuko nodded. “You should just tell her.”

Zuko threw another piece of bread at a turtle duckling. It was hiding under one of the stone coves. It swam out a little way and grabbed the bread, giving a quack for a thanks.

“It’s not that easy, Sokka.”

“It’s easier than mine,” he said with a slight tease to his voice.

“Not if my parents arrange my marriage,” Zuko snarked back. He sighed once more. “I don’t agree with this,” he repeated. “I think this is stupid and cruel and not fair to Yue.”

“It’s not fair to me!” Sokka yelled. Zuko glared at him and the turtleducks all started quacking. “Sorry,” he whispered. “It’s just… I’ve been thinking about it all, you know. I don’t even know if I can do it, being Chief. Everyone looks at me like I’m the incarnate of the Avatar. I’m the hero of the South, I’ll be the one to save everyone and fix everything. Me and Yue will fix all of the South’s problems. I just don’t know if I can…”

Zuko was quiet for a long time. He threw more bread in the pond. “I won’t tell anyone. Not even Katara. I’m not happy about it and I don’t support it… but you deserve to be happy, Sokka.”

“Thanks, I guess.” Sokka shrugged. It meant a lot from Zuko, that he wouldn’t tell Katara. It meant that Zuko still understood him and still had his back.

…

Sokka found a form of semi-happiness with Suki. He’d go and visit her every once and a while, they’d be happy in secret, both pretending that Sokka was normal. That he wasn’t an engaged Prince.

He still went and visited Princess Yue every couple of months, but they spent most of their time in silence. Sokka sometimes talked about politics or stories from the past months. Funny things Katara did or said. Sometimes he’d get a laugh out of her. Sometimes she’d make a responding remark.

But he didn’t really care anymore, he knew that at the end of the week he could go back to seeing Suki.

In fact, the more indifferent Yue was, the more he felt validated in his relationship. Yue probably wouldn’t even care. He wouldn’t if Yue had found someone.

(Okay, maybe that was a lie.)

Sokka would even say that things were going pretty well for him. He was finally happy for once in his life, someone finally seemed to care about him…

Sokka and Katara had just celebrated their seventeenth birthday, meaning his wedding was coming up. His mother would pull him aside and ask him for help planning the wedding. It was going to take place in the South, as that’s where they were to live. (There had been talk before Prince Porak was born about Sokka becoming the Northern Chief and Katara taking leadership of the South. Sokka was grateful that that wasn’t going to be the case.) Talking of his future wedding didn’t seem serious. He didn’t care about colors or ice sculptures, he didn’t care about which traditions to maintain. It didn’t feel like he was actually going to marry her.

A part of him knew, of course, that this was delusion. About once a week, he’d look in the mirror and not recognize himself. But Suki’s arms drew him in once more and he was helpless to her power.

Once during the wedding planning, he was caught up thinking of her. On his last trip to Kyoshi, Suki discovered that he’d never played King of the Hill—a game children used to play, one that Sokka didn’t have time for while he was taking his royal lessons. She had all of the Kyoshi Warriors come play with them. It was slightly embarrassing, but when Sokka finally “dethroned” one of the other girls and became the “monarch,” Suki’s eyes twinkled at him. He had to look away from her, or else their relationship might have been obvious.

“Sokka!” her mother interrupted his thoughts. He blinked out of his memory. “I’ve called your name three times now,” she scowled. “The wedding planner is here.”

Sokka looked over and sure enough, the royal planner was there, a look of impatience on her face. Sokka tutted, he wished he was back with Suki. His mother kicked him from under the table they were sitting at.

It was when the planner pulled up a sixth option of fine china that Sokka let out a groan. His mother shot him a look but before she could reprimand him, Katara came bursting into the room.

Running up to her mother she cried out, “Thank you, thank you, thank you!”

Her mother smiled and hugged her. “Of course, your more than ready, I trust you to be a good representation of the South.”

Katara looked up at Sokka. “Mom approved me to be the SWT ambassador, I’m going to the Fire Nation for my first solo trip.” She beamed at him, like actually beamed. Katara was always a little too cool for that, she would always talk about how she hated politics and was glad she didn’t get to rule. And now here she was, happy to be an ambassador. Probably so she can go canoodle with Zuko.

Sokka only glared at her and huffed. “I’m so happy for you,” he snarled. Katara took a step back.

“I thought you would be.” She was confused, yes, but Katara had the habit of immediately going on the defensive for things like this.

“I am! I am so happy that Princess Katara gets everything handed to her and wants for nothing.”

“Sokka,” his mother warned.

“You’ve never had to do anything you didn’t want to! You probably got to play King of the Hill!” he yelled. The wedding planner’s eyes were widened in shock.

“What the fuck is King of the Hill?” his sister screamed back.

“Princess Katara!” the Chiefess yelled.

“No, mom,” she huffed and then whipped her finger out and pointed it at him. “You need a reality check, Sokka. Princess Yue is one of the best girls that has ever existed, and all you do is bitch and whine about marrying one of the greatest women that I’ve ever met. Boo-hoo.” She turned around, facing the planner she bowed. “I apologize that you had to witness that, milady,” she said, before walking out of the room.

Sokka turned and looked at his mother, who looked down right pissed. Following his sister’s suit, he bowed and said, “I apologize as well, milady. If you will please excuse us, Chiefess Kya and I have to discuss some things.” The planner bowed out without a word, leaving him alone with his mother.

“You and Katara owe that woman a handwritten apology.” Sokka nodded. “I am sorry, Sokka,” she started. He held back a sigh, he was about to hear the same speech he’d heard for years. “I am sorry that you were born to me and that you were born first. But I am not sorry for arranging this marriage. Our people were—”

“Dying, I know,” he cut off. Then he bowed his head in an apology for interrupted once he saw the look in her eyes.

“I don’t think you do.” She said sternly. “Everything I have done has been to prepare you and Katara for this. You didn’t ask for this life but it’s the one you were given. I thought by now you would have excepted your fate, but there has been some talk up North about the status of your relationship with the princess—”

“Mom—”

She lifted her hand to interrupt his interruption. “Let me finish, Sokka. There has been some talk that your relationship with the princess is not as… stable as it appears. So now, I will ask you: do you want to marry Princess Yue?”

Sokka looked down, his hand clenched against his thighs. He thought of distant purple eyes, empty. He thought of warm brown eyes that crinkled when watching him laugh. “Do I have a choice?”

Kya reached out and put her hand on his and squeezed. “You always have a choice, my love. But this isn’t a choice of marrying Yue or not. It’s a choice of what makes you happy, of where your heart lies. Is it with your country or with Kyoshi Island.”

Sokka looked up, shocked. “How?”

She smiled sadly at him. “I didn’t know for sure until just now, but there was cause for speculation when my son asked to go on every trip to Kyoshi that he possibly could.”

“Mother, it’s just…” but he really didn’t know what to say.

“I’m giving you the option to go up North in two weeks, to try and smooth things over. Go or don’t, but you can’t be lukewarm about this. Nothing would give the North more reason to attack then finding out you broke the terms of the arrangement, instead of just the arrangement itself.”

“I—I need some time. To think.” His mother nodded.

He left the room, following his feet. Eventually he found himself outside walking further and further away from the palace and into the icy tundra. It was dark and he’d forgotten his parka. He lifted his hands to his face, but his tears had frozen onto his skin.

He fell to his knees with a scream. He screamed and cried and shouted into the hallow abyss. He was all alone out here, no one could hear his cried. He fell down and curled himself into a ball.

Why can’t I be happy? Suki makes me happy. It’s not fair, it’s not fair, it’s not fair, it’s not fair.

The words repeated in him mind over and over again. He’d just wanted to be a kid. He wanted to laugh with his friends, he wanted to lass out and eat with his mouth open, he wanted to find true love. And who knows if that was Suki or not, at least it was his choice, right?

Does your heart lie with your country or with Kyoshi?

He didn’t have an answer, but her found himself on a ship to the North two weeks later.

…

The trip was… fine. It felt fake. He felt fake. Yue was Yue and Sokka was Sokka, maybe they just weren’t meant to mix.

His sister came back from the Fire Nation… different. Her eyes didn’t shine with emotion anymore. Anytime he looked at his it felt unfamiliar—on both sides. It was like she didn’t recognize him anymore, and when he looked into her eyes, he didn’t see Katara either. If anything, this distant emptiness reminded him of Yue.

He wondered if it was her trip to the Fire Nation, but Zuko only had good things to say about it and he hadn’t heard his parents mention anything negative happing.

But one day, he heard her start to scream. He ran to her room as fast as he could, and what he witnessed might have been the scariest moment of his life.

Katara was in a sort of frenzy, she was screaming and crying and sobbing. She was curled in a ball, rocking herself. She was hitting herself.

He’d managed to restrain her, holding her in his arms while he tried to get her to breathe again. He wanted to apologize for the way he’d lashed out at her. He wanted so desperately for Katara to open up and tell him what was going on. He was so tired of being iced out by her.

“Please fetch mom,” was all she’d said. And who was Sokka to disobey his distressed sister.

His parents were in Katara’s room for a while, so he began to worry that something was wrong. And when Healer Hiyoka was called in, he knew something was wrong.

But he couldn’t do anything about it, so he decided to go back to his room and wait anxiously there. When he walked in, there was a fire hawk at his window. It was a letter from Zuko.

He’d been getting a lot lately, the most since Katara and him became friends. He opened it in hast. Zuko’s grandfather was very sick, and his parents were trying to arrange a marriage between him and Lady Mai, of all people.

The letter read:

Sokka,

Fire Lord Azulon is dead. He was pronounced dead this morning, no healer could save him. We don’t know what was wrong, other than he had some sort of sickness.

My family is going to hold a small ceremony of life before his public funeral. I humbly ask you and Katara to come and support me and my family.

It will take place in three days, please come if you can.

I miss you both dearly,

Zuko

The letter was very detached of emotion, not like Zuko’s typical writing.

Sokka tried to talk to Katara about it, but she refused to leave her room for days. On the day that they had to leave for the ceremony, Sokka was allowed to enter her room.

His sister had never looked so hallow before. Her eyes were sunken in and blood shot. As if she’d cried for days.

She’d claimed that she was sick, but Sokka didn’t believe it. Something was wrong with his sister, and Zuko probably knew something about it.

He left for the ceremony alone.

…

It was an understatement to say that Zuko looked depressed. His usual gentle face had fallen. And Sokka didn’t even know how to describe the look of sadness that came across his face when he realized Sokka was alone.

He didn’t ask Zuko about it until after the ceremony. But after an intense sparring match, Sokka asked if he wanted to sit at the pond again. Zuko only nodded heavily.

“I can’t believe he’s gone,” Zuko whispered. Sokka had stolen a loaf, but it lay untouched between them. Zuko had curled up, his arms wrapped around his knees. He looked hopeless. “He was rough and strict, but… He’d always say that he was a Fire Lord second and a grandfather first. When he stepped off that throne, he had such a loving soul. He loved us.”

Sokka was hunched over, chin resting in his hands, his elbows on his crisscrossed legs. He was facing Zuko, and he just listened. Zuko talked for a while about Grandfather Azulon. He talked about a side that Sokka never knew about, Fire Lord Azulon was known to be very ridged in his ruling. Once, Sokka and Zuko were running down the halls and he stopped them and gave them both a lecture about “image” and “prestige.”

But Zuko talked of a man who was distraught after his wife died, who would play with his grandkids at the beach in Ember Island. Who let Azula suck on his crown when she was teething.

Eventually, Zuko ran out of talking energy. He curled up a bit more, tucking his face behind his knees. Sokka assumed it was to hide his tears. Zuko was never good at crying in front of anyone. And who was Sokka to judge? He wasn’t either.

After what he felt was an appropriate amount of time, Sokka finally asked, “Are you going to tell me what’s going on between you and Katara?”

Zuko sniffled a little bit. He dropped his knees and crossed his legs like Sokka. “She’s not here, is she? I’d have to say that nothing is going on between me and Katara.”

Sokka rolled his eyes, “You know that’s not what I meant. Katara looks like shit, you look like shit. Just tell me what you guys blew out of proportion so we can fix it.”

“That’s the thing, Sokka. I don’t know what I did wrong. I—well, I talked about it with her afterwards. She seemed okay with forgetting everything.”

“Well, what’s ‘everything’?”

“We—” Zuko cut himself off, he looked guilty. “We got into… a fight.”

Huh, what’s he hiding. “A fight about what?”

Zuko bit his lips. “I don’t want to talk about, okay?” He looked down, but his guilty look didn’t drop. “I’m going to accept my parent’s request to marry Mai, anyway.”

“What?!” Zuko had always been so adamant that him and Mai could never make each other happy.

 “My father thinks it’ll be the best for our family and the girl I love couldn’t even bother to come to my grandfather’s funeral.”

Sokka looked into the water and saw his reflection dance. If Zuko could give up his love, so could he. “Yeah, I’m gonna end it with Suki.”

“Good.”

And with that, they sat in silence. Just two young boys pretending to men, doing the things right for their countries, for their families.

…

Despite admitting to himself how wrong his relationship was, he could never find the right time to end it. It was the off season for produce, so Sokka’s business in Kyoshi was minimal. He hadn’t seen her since the Fire Lord’s funeral.

He’d gone to Fire Lord Iroh’s coronation, where Katara just pouted the whole time. He was sort of over her moodiness right now.

He was so busy all the time, he was shadowing his parents almost all the time now. He was going to have his own coronation someday, so they were preparing him as best as possible to take over as Chief.

He didn’t get to see Suki before he left for the NWT once again. Which was disappointing, he’d have liked to have a visit without a guilty conscience.

This visit to the North was different than the others. Instead of public displays where the two acted as if everything was fine, they spent time planning their wedding. It was his mother’s idea, after she got tired of Sokka’s apathy. Sokka was to return to the South with notes from the Northern planner.

During these meetings, Sokka probably learned more about Yue than ever before.

“I would like to request that we have an arrangement of flowers,” her eyes twinkled at this request.

The planner looked at her with shock. “You want flowers at a Water Tribe wedding? There are no flowers in the Water Tribes.”

But Sokka wasn’t going to have Yue’s one desire be shut down. “We’ll import them. It can just be for the day.” He turned to Yue, who was smiling at him. He couldn’t see the smile itself, but he loved the way her eye’s crinkled. “What flowers do you want?”

“Blossoms. Cherry, Moon Peach, Jasmine, Fire. They always look so pretty in the spring.” He hadn’t seen her this excited about something since…

Since that day, ten years ago, in the weapons room.

The planner glared at her, her frown visible under her own mask. “Princess, your wedding is in June… I’m not sure there is a place that will have blossoms.”

“Find one,” Sokka almost snapped. He would fill the whole palace with blossoms if that made Yue smile like she was right now.  

An immense sense of guilt filled through him at the thought. He really needed to end it with Suki.

The other pleasantry about this visit, was being able to see Prince Porak after he presented as a waterbender. It brought him back to Katara when she first presented. His eyes lit up as the water moved as his command. His pout when he couldn’t move it quite like he wanted.

On one day, the Royal family was eating breakfast together. Prince Porak looked up at Sokka with wide eyes.

“Prince Sokka, are really related to The Master Katara.” Sokka couldn’t help but laugh.

Chief Arnook didn’t find it all that funny. “Princess Katara,” he corrected. “Women cannot be masters.”

Sokka clenched his fist. He opened his mouth, to rip the Chief a new one, but he felt something against his hand. He looked down to see Yue’s hand, resting on his. It was covered in a glove, but it was her hand none the less. He hadn’t felt her gloved hand since they were nine. He looked up at her, but Yue was looking at her younger brother.

Porak looked at his father in confusion. “But Master Katara is the best waterbender in the world.”

“Have you seen her fight?” Porak shook his head. “I assure you, the rumors exaggerate. It is merely the South trying to appear tougher than they are. Women cannot fight.”

Porak’s little brows furrowed. “But why?”

Sokka let out a little laugh. “If women knew how to fight, they wouldn’t have to wear masks now would they?”

The hand on Sokka’s hand shot up to cover Yue’s mouth as she disguised her laugh as a cough.

“Prince Sokka!” the chief chastised. “I understand that you and the South don’t have our traditional values, but please do not try and influence my son.”

Sokka looked down at his plate. One day, soon, he would be Chief, and he would be able to talk back to this man.

Porak insisted on spending the rest of Sokka’s visit with them. He’d ask a hundred questions a minute about anything and everything. It was adorable.

It wasn’t as if Sokka had never met Porak before, but it was as if the boy woke up one day and decided he actually liked Sokka. And he loved. He couldn’t help but be excited for the day when he’d have his own kids.

One night, they took him out for a walk. On the way back to the palace, he was tired and requested to be carried, and then fell asleep in Sokka’s tired arms. But he didn’t complain. He carried him all the way to his room and laid him in bed.

“Sokka,” the boy whispered. “Are you really going to marry my sister?”

He looked down at him and wondered if he looked anything like Yue. His eyes were just as expressive. He then thought—briefly—that any child he’d have with Yue would probably look similar to Porak. He couldn’t help but smile. “I am.”

Porak gave a cute little yawn. “She’s really pretty. You can’t see it, ‘cause she’s always covered up. But Yue is the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen.”

After leaving Porak’s chambers, he went to Yue’s and knocked on the door. She opened it, still covered from head to toe, only a sliver of her showed where her eyes were. She looked at him with wide eyes.

“I just wanted to say,” he started, feeling slightly nervous. “I can’t wait to have kids with you someday.”

Yue’s eyes widened ever more, and the faintest blush came up to her eyes. It was adorable.

She didn’t say anything in response, probably because he hadn’t said she could. But it didn’t matter, someday soon she would say whatever she wanted to him. Once he got her away from the wretched North.

…

His time back home was short. He’d planned to meet with Suki as soon as possible, but he hadn’t had a chance to go back to Kyoshi Island before he was being summoned out again.

A horrible tragedy had occurred: Lu Ten was assassinated. He didn’t hear it from Zuko, only from the invitation to mourn the Fire Nation’s beloved prince.

Lu Ten had almost been like a brother to Sokka. He’d spar with him, he’d tell him stories, give him life advice. Lu Ten’s advice was like Iroh’s, but comprehensible.

It hurt to know he would never hear Lu Ten’s voice or laughter anymore, but Sokka knew that it was Zuko who was the one hurting the most. First Katara, then Azulon, now Lu Ten. Even Sokka could say that Zuko’s life appeared to be falling apart.

There was a tiny part of him that was happy. Just a small part. Because he’d get to see Yue and Porak again so soon. This was strange, he’d never really felt this way before. Seeing Yue had always brought him a sense of dread.

When Porak saw him, he ran up to him and gave him a hug. He bent down to his level to hug him properly. In his ear, Porak whispered, “It that Master Katara?”

Sokka pulled away with a laugh. “Yup, but she’s in a bit of mood right now, so I’ll introduce you later.” He winked at him.

Porak looked skeptical, “Promise?” This kid was too cute.

“Here, I’ll show you a handshake that me and another friend of mine used to keep promises to each other.” It was created by Lu Ten actually. He had taught him and Zuko when they were young. Sokka forced a smile on his face, but he would miss Lu Ten.

Porak picked the handshake up pretty quickly and Sokka feigned being impressed. It wasn’t that complex, but Porak beamed under Sokka’s approval. One day soon, Porak would be his brother-in-law. And some day after that, they would be the two Chiefs of the Water Tribes.

He looked up at Yue and Katara, smiling at the thought. Yue was signing furiously to Katara who rolled her eyes. He couldn’t tell what she were saying, but it seemed like they were talking about him.

He looked back at Porak who asked him to do the handshake again. He happily complied, but Yue gesturing to him with her hands, only to seem upset stayed in the back of his mind.

Was Yue mad at him?

This whole time, he’d always thought that he was the one who got stuck in the unfortunate situation. But he never thought that Yue might have felt the same way, being stuck in an engagement to him…

Hmm… He’d have to apologize, but he didn’t know what for. All through dinner and even parts of the ceremony, he wracked his brain for anything he might have done to upset her over the years. And he was coming up blank.

And then it hit him.

He would never know what it was that upset Yue, because Yue would never tell him. She doesn’t even tell him when she’s happy, why would she tell him when she’s upset with him.

This put a damper on his mood, even though he was in the middle of a funeral. He looked up to where the royal family was, decided that he didn’t want to miss this. And that’s when he saw him.

Zuko, with a shaven head and red, ugly burn stretched across his face.

He went and found him after the ceremony. Zuko hadn’t sent him any letters since his last visit, Sokka had no idea what had happened. When the two boys saw each other, Zuko hugged him. It was an affection that they had never done before, but Sokka knew he needed it, so he held him tight.

“We can go to the pond tonight to talk, if you want,” Sokka said as when they pulled away. Zuko nodded and then turned back to where his family was.

Sokka went to the kitchens to steal some bread, but there was a loaf just sitting there. He suspected that one of the cooks knew it was them stealing bread. He then made his way to the gardens.

He had to wait a bit for Zuko to show up, but when he did, he looked like he was in shock. He went and sat down next to him, stumbling a bit as he did. He stared at the water.

“I’m sorry I didn’t write to you,” Zuko started. “I didn’t really know what to say.”

“What happened?”

“Lu Ten was killed in the middle of the night. It was dishonorable, the assassin killed him in his sleep.”

“I mean… What happened to you?”

“Oh.” Zuko brought his hand up to his face touching the skin below his burn. “My father.”

“Ozai did this to you?”

Zuko turned to him, his face somber. “It started on the night that Lu Ten was assassinated. I talked to him, told him about Katara. It was to be announced in a couple of days that I was engaged to Mai, but… He convinced me to go down to the Southern Water Tribe and talk to Katara. But first, he told me to call off my engagement. It wouldn’t be fair to Mai otherwise.”

Zuko pulled off a piece of bread and through it in the pond, just like they’d always do.

“Then, he was killed. I—I—I didn’t know what to do. How am I supposed to do this Sokka?”

“Do what?”

“Grieve! Lu Ten was such a good man. He was my hero. He…He understood me and the world and… I will never be as good as him. As good as the Nation’s beloved prince.”

And it made sense now. Lu Ten was the crown prince, now that he was dead, Zuko was second in line.

“What did your father do to you?”

“He… He told me that it was dishonorable to call of an arrangement after the paperwork had all been signed. He was so mad, I don’t think I’d ever seen him so mad before. I told him that I didn’t care, that I wanted to try and find happiness, and that Mai and I just weren’t right for each other… He challenged me to an Agni Kai.”

“And you lost.”

“Of course I lost, how am I supposed to fight my father? I didn’t even fight. I shaved my head as my penance, but I refuse to marry Mai. Lu Ten is right, I should have fought for Katara.”

“Yeah well, Katara’s been kinda a mess lately…” He was thinking about all the times she’d yell at him. And she hadn’t smiled at their parents in months.

“I can understand why.” It was ominous, Zuko knew something.

“What did she tell you?” Sokka swallowed. Katara had been shutting him out for so long now.

“I don’t know if she’d want me to tell you.” But the look on Sokka’s face must have convinced him otherwise. “She told me she got branded.”

“Branded?!” Sokka’s jaw dropped. “But that’s—that’s archaic? The South has never…” His parents would never do that to her. “But that means that she… um… that she….”

“I think you should talk about it with her, Sokka. I don’t think I’m the best person to talk about it with her.”

“I would if I could. Katara doesn’t talk to me anymore.”

And, of course, this was proven when Sokka was forced to keep his promise. The next day Porak forced him to introduce him to Master Katara. He went and found her alone in her chambers, but all she said to him was, “Now is not the time Sokka. Yue’s brother or not, I don’t care about some kid; I just want to be left alone.”

…

Sokka was confused to say the least. Katara was acting funny, Zuko was acting funny. Yue wasn’t acting funny because she didn’t say anything at all, but somehow, he wanted her to. But the one thing he wasn’t confused on was that he needed to end his relationship with Suki.

He jumped at the opportunity to go to Kyoshi, but his father said that he needed to go as well. This meant no sneaking off to see her, though, because his father could not suspect anything.

His wedding was encroaching very fast. He was turning eighteen in a matter of months and then six months after that he’d be married.

He needed to end this as quickly as possible. When they saw each other from afar, she’d smiled so brightly at him. She definitely didn’t think anything was wrong, during the off-season last year he couldn’t visit her a lot either.

So, he’d have to risk it. He snuck out of his room that was right next to his father’s and went to the warrior’s barrack. This was the worst idea Sokka had ever had, but he couldn’t let this go on. He grabbed a small rock and threw it at the window in the back, hoping that Suki would hear it and no one else.

He heard the window and out poked Loyah. She seemed to be half asleep and tried to rub the sleep out of her eyes. “Sokka? What are you doing here this late?”

Sokka could’ve punched himself. “I need to see—”

But then Loyah’s head was pulled back inside. There was some mumbling, but then Suki popped out.

“Sokka! What are you doing? If you get caught—”

“Yeah, yeah, I know. I just need to talk to you. Can you meet me?”

Suki nodded and Sokka went ahead to their “spot.” There was a small forest towards the edge of the village, the trees would cover them from anyone wondering around at night. When he saw her, she was already running towards him. She greeted him by throwing her arms around him and kissing him.

But when Sokka didn’t kiss her back, she pulled away. “What’s wrong?”

Sokka looked down at her, but before he could say anything there was a loud, “What the fuck?” behind them.

Suki jumped away from him like she’d been shocked, and they both turned to see Loyah, with wide eyes staring at them. Shit. Of all people, Loyah was the worst one to get caught by.

“Loyah, it’s not what you think,” Sokka immediately said.

“Oh really? Because it looks like Suki, the woman I’ve looked up to all these years, is having an affair with you, an engaged man.”

Suki had her hand over her mouth and her eyes were full of panic.

“Loyah,” Sokka said, carefully. “You can’t tell anyone.”

“You’re getting married in six months, Sokka! And all this time, every time you came and visited us, or you had business.”

“Please, promise me you won’t say anything. It could cause another civil war between the Water Tribes if anyone found out.”

Loyah laughed. “Well, maybe you should have thought of that before you jumped into another woman’s bed!”

The comment made Suki snap out of it. “We’ve never done that!”

Loyah didn’t care. “End it.” Her face was the most serious he’d ever seen her. “End it. Tell your father to send someone else to oversee Kyoshi Island until you get married and become Chief. And if I ever see you again on Kyoshi, I will tell your future wife.”

She spit out the last word. Sokka would never forget the look of betrayal on Loyah’s face. He looked down at Suki, this was… this was actually kind of perfect. Now, Suki wouldn’t have to be broken up with. She’d go on thinking that Sokka still liked her but was forced to stay away and Sokka had a reason to end it.

He swallowed and forced his face into a look of pain. “I’m sorry Suki. I have to choose my tribe.”

Suki looked away from him. “Can we have a moment alone? To say goodbye?”

“No. Sokka, go tell your father you’re sick or something and get the fuck off of our island.” With that, Loyah grabbed Suki’s arm and dragged away, back to the barrack.

Sokka and Hakoda left early the next morning when Hakoda asked him why he was so chirpy.

Sokka shrugged, “I just finally did something I should have done long ago. It feels good to finish something I’d been putting off.”

Hakoda laughed. “Remember this feeling the next time you’re procrastinating something.”

…

Sokka’s birthday came and went. The 75^th games passed, too. But this was the first year that Sokka was alone for it. Katara didn’t want to go because she didn’t want to see Zuko. Zuko didn’t go because he didn’t want to see Katara. And because Katara didn’t go, she didn’t ask Chief Arnook for Yue’s attendance either. The games took place in the NWT, but the games were hosted far away from the capital, so Yue was not permitted to attend.

It was just Sokka, but he spent his time with a young blind earthbender, who seemed like she’d rather be anywhere but there. She’d told him something about being able to see with her feet, but on the ice, she couldn’t see anything? He didn’t really understand.  

Toph was only fifteen and very vulgar. She cursed more than anyone he’d ever met and challenged anyone who disagreed with her to a fight. But the more he got to know her, the more he realized that if Toph weren’t on the ice right now, she’d overpower him.

He told her once, that he liked that she said whatever she wanted because she knew she could beat anyone in a fight. He wished more girls were like that. She only laughed.

“I’m not like this at home. I’m actually the secret daughter of the Beifong’s.” Sokka’s jaw dropped. “When I’m at home, I stay quiet and small, just like they want.”

“Why? Why hide who you really are?”

“It’s not as simple as just cursing out my family. For a long time, they made me feel like I was helpless. It’s not true, of course. I’m the greatest earthbender of all time! I even learned how to bend metal!” She sighed. “But my parents don’t see that. They see me as a weak, helpless, blind girl. Whenever I’m around them, sometimes I even begin to think that I am.”

Sokka nodded in understand. Before he realized she couldn’t see him. “Yeah, that makes sense.” To which Toph responded with punching him in the arm.  

Overall, the games were calm, much calmer than past years. It was probably his favorite games up to date; it helped that a Southern Waterbender beat a Northern Waterbender for the gold title in the champion challenge.

But the return home was a slap back into reality. The wedding was in two months, and the wedding planning was intense. It was no longer about what food they’d serve; it was about preparing the palace for so many guests. The South wasn’t used to hosting. They’d never hosted a game before, never had a wedding as their own recognized nation. Sokka’s wedding would be the first time that the South ever had a large event that every noble would attend to.

Katara had told him that Yue wanted to have a best man and a best woman. Why Yue couldn’t have told him herself, Sokka would never know. But he knew who he wanted. Whatever was going on between Katara and Zuko would have to be shoved aside. Sokka was only getting married once and Zuko was going to be by his side for it.

Zuko replied to him, telling him that he’d love to be Sokka’s best man and that was that. He hadn’t told Katara explicitly that he chose Zuko, but she had to have known, right?

With the wedding drawing so close, the whole tribe seemed to be buzzing with excitement. It made him happy, to see his people so happy.

Enough time had passed since Lu Ten’s funeral, that Sokka felt like he could finally address what Zuko told him to Katara. He pulled her aside one night and they snuck into the kitchens to steal some desserts. The kitchen was making a lot of sweats that Sokka had been forced to try in preparation for the wedding.

This was something they’d do as kids. It was a rude awakening to see how much time had passed since then.

“So, do you want to tell me what’s been going on, Katara.”

She’ll looked up at him with a fake innocence. “What do you mean?”

“Zuko told me… about the branding.”

Katara’s face fell, and she pushed away the tart she’d been munching on. “Sokka, I didn’t want you to know.”

He reached out and grabbed her hand, squeezing it. “Why?”

“Because I made a mistake. I shouldn’t have done it and now Mom and Dad think I’m some sort of tramp and—”

“Hey,” he cut her off. “You are not a tramp. And Mom and Dad shouldn’t have let that happen to you. Katara look at me,” she looked up and Sokka brushed away her tears. “When I am Chief, no women will ever be branded again. Remember what you told me. Virginity is a social construct used to oppress women. I don’t care if they told you it was to make you pure again. You were never dirty.”

Katara threw her arms around Sokka, and he held her tightly while she sobbed. Katara pulled away with a laugh. “I can’t believe that Zuko told you.” She wiped her eyes, then narrowed them. “But if he told you that, then it’s fair that I tell you that I know about you and Suki.”

Sokka looked down and brought his hand up to his neck. “Yeah, I kind of expected that you knew.” Katara went to slap him, but he stopped her. “Hey, I ended it, okay? It was wrong and when the time is right, I’ll tell Yue about it. But only after the wedding, we can’t risk causing another civil war.” Katara nodded, but her face said she disagreed. “Are you going to finish that tart?” he said, gesturing to her half-eaten dessert. She rolled her eyes but picked it up and started eating again.

But this conversation opened up something between the twins once again. Katara started seeking him out, they started laughing together again. Maybe, things wouldn’t be so bad anymore.

Afterall, he was going to get married in a couple months. And for some reason, he couldn’t wait.

Chapter Text

Sokka didn’t know this, but there were many arguments about what traditions to keep for their wedding ceremony. Chiefess Kya fought long and hard for certain traditions to be held in place and for others to not be there. But there were two that the North didn’t budge on. The first, Yue was to keep her mask and hood on until the wedding night. This request was given by Yue herself, she wanted to keep them on for as long as possible. The second was the witness on the wedding night. One of the Water Sages was going to sit behind a curtain and listen to her have sex for the first time.

It wasn’t the most violating thing that had happened to her, so she would live. Sokka might be upset though.

There were other traditions that they managed to agree on. Yue was to weave a blanket for the two of them for their wedding night. She worked long and hard on the design and made sure to take her time on ever knot that was to be made. It was comforting, a countdown for when the wedding would take place.

She was quite happy to be marrying into the South. Who else would understand her other than the other people who had been oppressed by the North. There was only one group of people that the North hated more than women and that was the South.

The North despised the South. All her life, Yue had been subjected to teasing and taunting by everyone around her because of it. She was the unfortunate princess who was forced to marry the Southern Savage who called himself Prince. A “Savage Sucker” is what they called her. And it wasn’t until much later that Yue learned what that truly meant.

When she was very young, she’d hear horror stories about how the Southern Savages would sneak into to Northern territories and murder the women and children during the war. They were monsters who had no sense of morality and no respect for traditional values.

She remembered being scared before her first meeting with Sokka. But she was comforted to know that a chaperon would be with her the whole time. Her mother reassured her that she needn’t be scared.

Yet, Sokka was not who she thought he’d be. He was no monster, but a curious boy. The first thing he asked her was why she and the other girls wore masks. She hadn’t been able to answer him, because he had never given her explicit permission to speak. This upset him, so she turned to her chaperon to get him to explain it to the boy.

“What do you mean? I have to give you permission to speak. You can speak on your own, can’t you?”

Yet another question she couldn’t answer.

Sokka wasn’t really good at remembering the rules. They would go into separate rooms, and he’d look at her expectantly. Some days, he wouldn’t remember until an hour into the “conversation.” Her father was right, the Southerners were savages. They had no concept of the rules, no traditions.

That was until one visit, Sokka was bouncing with excitement. “My sister presented as a waterbender. Her teacher, Master Hama, said she’s one of the best benders she’d ever seen!”

Yue couldn’t yet respond, but her eyes widened in wonder. But girls couldn’t fight, could they?  Who was this sister of his, did she have to wear a hood and mask as well?

Not that Yue felt it a chore to wear it, it was very comforting. Her mother would tell her stories of men who preyed upon women who dressed inappropriately. “If we cover up, Yue, we don’t have to worry about them hurting us.” So, Yue wore her mask and hood with pride, knowing she was a modest girl who wasn’t stumbling men into temptation. Her covers kept her safe. She was safe.

She wondered if the reason the women in the South didn’t wear masks and hoods was because they were capable of becoming master waterbenders. They didn’t need the masks to defend them from predators, they could do it themselves.

She kept these thoughts to herself for a while, until that day. The day young Yue fell in love with Prince Sokka.

He’d asked her for a tour of the palace, but he stared at her more than he looked at the places she was describing. Yue was very grateful for the mask—she didn’t know if she could handle Sokka staring at her face.

And then, something incredible happened. “Do you trust me?” He asked as he took her by the hand, and they ran away together.

It felt fantastical. She couldn’t help but laugh as they ran. When they came up on one of the secret rooms she’d stumbled upon while exploring the palace on her own, she dragged him towards it. She remembered smiling, looking at the boy in front of her, still holding her hand, as the sounds of guards ran past them. Her heart was beating in her chest, this was the most carefree she’d ever been. He was looking into her eyes, and Yue swore that even her mother, who’d seen her stark naked, had never seen her the way Sokka had in that very moment.

They waited until they couldn’t hear any voices, and all the footsteps died off before they snuck back out and Sokka let her back to the weapons room. He locked the door, and she was suddenly struck with the seriousness of the situation. She was now locked in a weapons room with a boy, alone. Anything could happen.

Yue decided that it would best not to show her panic and instead sat against the wall by the door to watch him. Sokka was too preoccupied in the northern weapons to talk to her. Yue wondered what weapons they had in the South, or if they really murder their kill with their bare hands, like she overhear the guard saying.

It also occurred to her that Sokka only wanted to look at the weapons, and that her being there was an unnecessary biproduct.

Sokka was messing around with some nun chucks, when he turned to her and asked her if she knew how to fight. She merely laughed at the idea of a women fighting.

Women didn’t need to fight, they had their masks to protect them from bad people. And besides it was forbidden for women to fight, they were too important to be used as tools for defense. That was what the men were for.

She told Sokka as much, but she didn’t think he really understood what she meant. He looked at her funny and then said something that struck fear in her eyes. “You can take that off.”

She had never felt such intense fear before. If she took off her mask, Sokka might be tempted to hurt her. She couldn’t underestimate him nor this “female power” her mother was always talking about.

“It’s forbidden.”

Sokka rolled her eyes at her. Had this boy never heard of structure before? The rules were in place to protect her. She mustn’t break them.

But I already have, haven’t I? I’m here, alone in this room, and Sokka doesn’t look like he wants to hurt me.

He’d told her to get up, he wanted to fight her. He was going to kill her with his bare hands. Or worse, he was going to mutilate her with the weapons her tribe used to defend against the Southern Savages. My parents are going to kill me…

But then the words he’d said before came to her mind. “Do you trust me?” For some reason, she’d trusted him before, and it felt so good then. Maybe it would feel good to trust him again.  

(Yue would laugh about her naivety later, when Sokka revealed that he wanted to teach her to fight, not fight her himself.) It took her a moment to decide what to do. It was forbidden for her to fight, but if she said no what would happen? Would Sokka accept her rejection or punish her for saying no. She’d never said no to a man before.

She nervously got up to stand next to him.

The way Sokka taught her was as if he’d already expected her to succeed. He was almost shocked when she didn’t pick something up right away, but that never stopped him from explaining it again or in a different way.

(Later, Yue would understand when she’d meet Katara. Sokka’s sister was a prodigy, it was only natural for him to assume that all girls were strong as well.)

Yue liked the part where she would block Sokka’s punches. It was fun, to try and figure out where he was going and how she was going to stop it. It also felt like double the protection—for, you know, if the mask fell off or something.

But it wasn’t just that, the way Sokka encouraged her, the way he smiled at her when she did something right, it made her feel powerful. (Yue would come to understand that it wasn’t power she felt, but equality. But to an oppressed girl like her, equality was more power than she’d ever had before.)

Once Sokka deemed her blocking skill sufficient, he started to teach her how to punch. It was a skill that Yue didn’t think she’d ever need, but she learned, nonetheless.

It was then that they heard the banging on the door. Yue’s heart stopped. The person behind the door called out for her and she recognized the voice. It was a guard who would always sneer at her when she passed. He’d once made a comment to her, one that she didn’t fully understand, but still made her uncomfortable.

Her eyes filled with tears at the thought of him finding her. Alone. With Sokka.

When the door opened, it was her father who stepped in first. She’d never seen him look so angry before, especially when it was directed at her. The weight of her decisions fell over her.

She didn’t think, she just threw herself at his feet. All manners left her as she apologized. Please, it’s not what you think, she’d wanted to say. But he cut her off. She’d immediately regretted it, she’d just spoken without permission and thus doubled her punishment. (The last time she spoke out of turn, she’d been forced to suck on a bar of soap for an hour. She had bubbles coming out of her nose.)

It was that guard who was asked to take her to her room, but on the way there he’d pulled her into an off-shot hallway. He picked her up by her throat and said the words that she’d never forget.

“You filthy fucking Savage Sucker.”

Yue pulled at his hands. She couldn’t speak even if she’d been granted it.

“You’ve gone and ruined yourself now, haven’t you? I guess it doesn’t matter if I have a taste now? Huh?”

Yue was gasping for air, but his big hands were wrapped around her little neck. When he did set her down, he only reached down and groped her flat chest and reached between her legs. She didn’t understand what was going on, but she was crying. She couldn’t yell for help, she’d already spoken out of turn once already. Suddenly, Sokka’s instructions came to the forefront of her mind. Twist your wrist, thumb to the sky, pinky to the floor. Don’t tuck your thumb. And then her fist connected with the guard’s jaw.

He yelped and threw her to the ground. “You fucking bitch! You’re gonna pay for that.”

“Nado!” someone yelled—her savior. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?”

The guard—Nado—lifted her up with a frustrated sigh. “Just using the Palace’s new resident whore.” Yue’s knees wobbled, she couldn’t feel her legs.

“Princess Yue is expected to be in her chambers. You gonna bust that quickly inside a little girl?”

Nado shrugged. “You know how good tight pussy is.” He pushed her forward to get her to walk. “One word of this to anyone Princess, and I’ll make do on my threats.”

Yue couldn’t move and the two guards had to drag her back to her chambers. Her mother was waiting for her. She thanked the two guards for returning her daughter, she’d been worried sick.

Yue was sat down on her bed, her mother kneeling in front of her. Yue looked down at her hands wrapped around hers. They were both gloved, but Yue was the only one still wearing her mask and hood.

“What did that boy do to you?”

He assaulted me. Yue blinked, trying to process the past few minutes. He assaulted her, didn’t he? She was so confused.

“Yue, did Prince Sokka hurt you?”

Oh. “Nothing. He didn’t do anything to me.” Yue couldn’t have Sokka punished for this, she had to act like everything was okay. She could do it, she was a princess after all.

Her mother frowned, “I don’t believe that. He’s a savage and you look…” her mother pursed her lips. “You look frightened.”

Nado words ran through her mind. Yue forced herself to look into her mother’s eyes when she spoke. “The guards made me walk fast to get here is all.”

Her mother didn’t believe her. She reached up and removed Yue’s mask and lowered her hood. “Do you promise?”

Yue feigned a smile. “Of course, Prince Sokka and I were just having some fun, that’s all. I’m sorry that we caused you all to worry.”

Then, her father came into her room with Healer Kyomo.

“I talked with the boy, he said that it was all harmless fun, and nothing happened. I still think it would be best to check Yue, though.” Her father sounded unhappy, but Yue didn’t know why.

Her mother stood up. “I agree, you can never be too careful with a savage.”

Yue was forced to lay down on her bed as her clothes were stripped from her. Her mother, of course, had seen Yue’s naked form, but her father was still in the room. It was even worse when her legs were forced apart so the healer could look at her “properly.”

That day had turned out to be the worst day of Yue’s life. After she learned what being “checked” meant and Healer Kyomo left, Yue was whipped five times for intentionally breaking custom.

Oh, and she was forced to suck on a bar of soap while her father did it.

Yet, Yue learned many important things that day:

Sokka was not the one who was a savage.

And the mask? It did nothing to protect her from the real savages of the world.

…

The months after that disaster of a visit, Yue forced herself to forget. Instead, she thought of her betrothed, who treated her like an equal. Her fiancé, who knew how to fight but didn’t hurt her. Sokka, who only asked questions to get to know her. “Do you trust me?” he asked. And Yue knew that the answer would always be yes.

She’d walk around the palace daydreaming about him. He’d come to visit her, and she’d answer his questions. He’d get to know her and love her, just as she loved him. She got some books from the library, books about princess being locked away and saved by princes. One day Sokka was going to save her from this prison.

But then, something awful happened. She’d overheard a conversation.

She didn’t mean to, and if she’d been caught, who knows what her punishment was. She was sneaking back from the library, she’d just finished reading another love story and was thinking about Sokka and his dreaming eyes that stared into her soul. She walked past her father’s study when she’d heard it.

“I’ve gone over the treaty a thousand times, sir, there is no loophole. If we break it, the South will be able to punish us as they see fit. If it’s broken, them and their allies will come at us with full force!” It was her father’s advisor. She didn’t know his name, but she’d seen him from afar. She looked through the cracked door, careful not to make a sound.

“I don’t want my daughter marrying that savage! I want the South, they were wrongfully granted independence as is.” Her father tutted. “If only the boy had actually assaulted Yue, then we’d at least have a reason to break the treaty.”

Yue gasped. How could Father say that about me?

There was silence for a moment and the advisor said, “That isn’t too terrible of an idea, sir.”

Yue leaned forward on the door, and it creaked. Scared that she’d be discovered, she turned and ran before she could get caught, all the way back to her room.

As she lied in her bed, she cried silently. Her father wanted… he wanted Sokka to assault her… He was trying to take away the one thing she’d wanted, that she’d dreamt off: a life with her Prince as far away from this prison.

It turns out, she didn’t even need to eavesdrop. Her parents sat her down the next day and told her of the plan. Yue was to start taking special classes, classes where she’d learn how to seduce. And in time, Sokka wouldn’t be able to control himself and he would rape her. With that, the South would have broken the treating, and the North could make her advance once more.

She felt sick to her stomach.

…

She left each lesson feeling disgusted with herself. She learned how flutter her eyelashes, how to touch subtly, how to laugh and flirt. Her teacher told her that soon, Sokka would ask to sneak off with her and that she should let him. She should let him take her mask and hood off, she should let him touch her.

…

The next meeting with Sokka was hard. He seemed so excited to see her. He reached out like he wanted to hug her, only to remember that it would be inappropriate. He’d joke with her, and she’d bite her lips not to smile. She had to force herself to look away from him, she had to stay strong to protect him.

Each night, Yue’s mother would come to visit her, asking her why she wasn’t acting the way she was supposed to.

“Your chaperone said that you didn’t even say a word to him! That you didn’t even look at him,” she yelled. “You didn’t do anything your teacher told you to!”

But Yue refused to break her resolve. She was doing this for Sokka, for her tribe and her future country. And when her mother beat her for this, she cried herself to sleep only to do the same thing the next day.

And the hardest part of it all? When Sokka realized that Yue was icing him out again. She watched as each day his excitement to see her dwindled and her heart broke each time. She’d told herself that someday it would be okay, someday she’d be able to explain it to him.

Yue was happy when when he started to invite Katara along on his visits. Katara was a buffer, another witness. It meant that Sokka was no longer alone on his visits, he had someone he could talk to. They could get to know each other without the consequences, she could listen to him speak and joke without taking any risks.

And she loved to listen to Sokka speak. He was so exuberant when he talked to his sister, whether they were fighting over something or laughing about something. She wished she could join in on the conversation, but she restrained herself every time. Laughing along, talking along, it led to other things. Indulgence was a slippery slop, and she had to protect Sokka. Her chaperon’s eyes bore down at her anytime Sokka was nearby.

(Her mother once said that she didn’t recognize her daughter. How could Yue not try and do everything she could for her country? How could Yue betray the North in such a way. Her mother refused to look at her at mealtimes and ignored her during all the other times.)

In time, she learned to love spending time with Katara. Her parents underestimated her because she was a girl. Which meant that Katara was safe. There was no chaperon late at night, when Katara was in her room. It wasn’t against the rules for her to take her mask and hood off in front of Katara. She could say whatever she wanted, do whatever she wanted, in the privacy of her chamber with her friend. A freedom she’d never had before.

Having Katara around was a luxury that she could only thank Sokka for. And for that, she was grateful. After all, they had their whole lives to truly get to know each other. When they were away from the South, that’s when Yue could be herself.

…

But Yue underestimated Sokka’s disdain for her.  

She didn’t realize it until the night her and Katara stole that bottle of wine. As she had snuck back to her room, she ran into him and Zuko. She didn’t know Zuko, but Sokka was safe and Sokka trusted Zuko.

“You know how much trouble you’d get in if anyone found out about this, right?”

Yes, she thought. But then she thought of that day, years ago in the weapons room. Maybe she could have one day of freedom, one day to enjoy Sokka’s company once more. She just wanted one day to be happy.

But today wasn’t not that day. As soon as the words, “I dare you to take your mask off” come out of Sokka’s mouth that she realized just how wrong she was.

She couldn’t do that, she couldn’t take her mask off. Indulgence is a slippery slop. The wine was a bad idea, staying here with Sokka was a bad idea. She was ruining everything.

If Sokka saw her without a mask… well, that was just what her mother wanted. She would be ruined, and the treaty would be broken, the tribes would be in disarray and war would break.

And didn’t he know that stealing a bottle of wine, that being rebellious with Katara… none of those consequences could compare to be violated. To having her legs spread open while her mother, her father, the healer all checked her purity. She’d rather be beated by her mother for disobedience.

She’d meant what she said, Sokka yelling at her to speak made him a fool. His words showed that despite his positive view on women, he truly knew nothing.

And Yue would rather been called “Savage Sucker” by the northern guards than “Perfect Pretty Princess” by Sokka, any day.

Katara stopped visiting with Sokka, she said that they needed to “talk.” But with the chaperone around… what was Yue to say?

…

Yue’s mother died. She tried to cry, really. But all she could think of was her hands on her, while the healer violated her. Of hearing her mother say she needed to make Sokka rape her. Of her mother beating her when she refused.

But no, all she felt was gratitude. She looked down at her baby brother. She was grateful that he was a he, that he’d be free from her personal hell.

…

Her and Sokka’s relationship only got worse and worse over the years. Sokka didn’t even pretend to have a conversation with her anymore. Yue could never say anything because Sokka never gave her permission, but she didn’t even need it. It wasn’t like there was a question she could answer anyway.

They would sit in silence for hours. Her father seemed happy about this, saying that Sokka would break the treaty somehow, that if Yue kept upsetting him, he’d snap somehow. And at this point, Yue didn’t care. She was miserable here and she was miserable with Sokka.

Porak made it easier. He had a nanny, of course. But Yue spent as much time with him as she could. It made her excited for her own children someday… even if she cringed at the thought of who their father would be. But she would smile as she chased him around the palace, as she would tuck him in at night. She would treat him better than their mother even could.

…

When she was around fifteen, her father had to take a trip to the Fire Nation and Yue asked to go along. She didn’t know why, really, but the only time she’d ever been out of the NWT was for special events.

Her father begrudgingly agreed, but only after she swore not be stupid. If Yue ruined herself… the North might be responsible for a broken treaty.

The Fire Nation was hot, and Yue was never allowed to wear the skimpy dresses that were fashionable. Lady Azula had tea with her. Yue was dressed in a satin-like material that covered anything. Azula wore a two piece that showed off her breasts and her thin waste.

She ate breakfast with Princess Ursa and Prince Ozai. Ursa was very kind, and she was a great conversationalist. Ozai said that she was free to speak anytime in the Fire Nation and when Yue still sat quietly each morning, he granted her speech anyway.

Fire Lord Iroh invited her to his study once, he asked how she was doing. It wasn’t like she could answer honestly, because her chaperon was still in the room. Anything she said would be reported back to her father. Still, with a twinkle in his eye, he gave her some wonderful advice. Time is the greatest healer.

She even plucked up the courage to speak to Lord Zuko. They went for a walk in the Palace gardens, with her chaperone a few steps behind them. It was silent, for the most part, and Yue was simply in awe at the fire blossoms. They didn’t really have vegetation in the North, not like this at least. Zuko escorted her ‘round and ‘round, smiling softly as she oohed and awed at everything. He asked her one question, a strange one. He asked her if she had ever met the Kyoshi Warriors, or even heard of them.

She pursed her lips. “No, I haven’t had the chance to make their acquaintance. Should I have?”

Zuko looked at her funny. “No,” he said quickly. “It’s just, Sokka is doing a lot of trade on Kyoshi Island, and he’s learning their fighting style.” He grimaced at the last word.

Her lips downturned. “Do you disapprove of their fighting style?” She really didn’t know much about this, but she knew Zuko was a renowned fighter.

“No! No.” He corrected. “I just thought Sokka would have mentioned it to you.”

Yue smiled. “Awe, well. I see the problem.” She looked down, a fire blossom had fallen and made its way to her feet. She wanted to pick it up, freeze it, preserve it forever. But it was doomed to shrivel and die, like all things. “Sokka and I don’t really talk anymore. We usually sit there in silence.”

Zuko seemed surprised by this. “The whole time?”

“The whole time,” Yue nodded. Then she smirked. “What do you do with Princess Katara when she visits?”

Zuko looked away from her and blushed. I knew it. Katara had always told her there was nothing going on, but Yue had a feeling. “It’s not like that. Katara and I aren’t… like that.”

Yue hummed and that was the end of the conversation, she’d gotten all that she needed anyway.

She left the Fire Nation with a sense of freedom. This could be her life, soon, when she married Sokka. (Iroh was right, time did heal—their silence felt more comforting than painful after her trip.)

…

Sokka’s friendship with her brother Porak upset her. She couldn’t help but look at them as they spoke freely and feel jealous. He had spoken up about Katara, he’d even quoted what Yue had said so long ago about the masks.

He understood the oppression of women in the north, he understood that Katara was powerful. He even stood up for her to Yue’s father, or at least he was going to before Yue stopped him.

So why couldn’t he understand her?

--He told her that he wanted to have kids with her… where did that even come from?

She tried talking with Katara about this, but she was going through her own stuff. (She realized she must have been wrong about Zuko). With the branding and all—maybe the South wasn’t as perfect as they pretended.

…

Most of the Northern Tribe refused to travel so far for the wedding, so there weren’t many people on the ship here. She had celebrated her eighteenth birthday with her people, before saying goodbye forever.

Yue hadn’t traveled much, only when allowed, and she had never been to the South before. It was beautiful. It truly was their sister tribe, while the elaborate designs were different, it was comparable to her own home. The main difference Yue noticed in the South, was the women who walked around with their face uncovered and their hair down. Each of them had different hair styles, it was a form of expression for them.

Yes, it was different—no visible oppression, but Yue knew the truth.

She had met with Sokka, briefly, when he’d welcomed her. He’d kissed her gloved hand and smiled brightly, but Yue just assumed that it was probably due to their audience. Yue knew who Sokka was when they were alone.

It was Katara who greeted her shyly. Yue hadn’t seen her since the Late Crown Prince’s funeral. She hadn’t answered any of her letters either, only a quick response that said she’d be happy to be her best woman.

Yue had spent most of her time here in the South Pole with Chiefess Kya and Katara. They kept her company while she finished the last touches on her wedding blanket. A dumb tradition, according to Katara. Currently, Sokka was out with Zuko hunting for a moose-bear that would be served at their wedding feast tomorrow.

Really, Yue didn’t mind. It wasn’t like she knew how to hunt, and she’d always found a sort of solace from her weaving and embroidery. She could sit quietly and control every movement. Plus, she was known to be quite good at it, Yue’s blankets had been hung throughout the Northern Palace.

Currently, however, she was working on undoing the last three rows of knots and she couldn’t seem to focus. Her bottom lip was bright red from the constant attack of her teeth, and the only thing she could think about was where she’d be in twenty-four hours. It was late at night, the fire was crackling in the women’s drawing room. This time tomorrow, Yue would be celebrating with her husband at their feast. After, she’d be alone with him.

“Princess Yue, that blanket truly is awe-inspiring. After you return from Mei Gao, I would be honored if you would make me and Hakoda one.” 

Yue blushed and turned away from the Chiefess, but she nodded, nonetheless. It was another thing that made her anxious, her and Sokka were allowed two weeks of leave to… vacation after their wedding. It was supposed to be exciting, but Yue just felt nauseous. Not that Sokka’s mother would understand, nor did she feel the need to talk about it with the woman.

Yue didn’t even want to go to Mei Gao, she’d wanted to go to Kiyoshi Island. After Zuko told her about it, she went and read about it in the library. She wanted to go to a real beach where she could actually swim. She wanted salt water to curl her hair. She wanted mountains close by and beautiful vegetation. She wanted to “tan,” whatever that was. 

However, Sokka argued that his family had a very nice property in Mei Gao, by one of the lakes that was secluded. They’d still be able to swim, he said, and hike. Maybe not tan, but that’s because of the tall trees towering over everything. It was beautiful, he said. And who was Yue to have an opinion, Sokka had grown up going to both places and Yue had only ever been to Ba Sing Se or Caldera City.

“Of course, Chiefess Kya, I would be honored to give you one of my blankets.”

Beside her, Katara cursed, and sucked on her finger. She’d already stabbed herself with her embroidery needle three times.

“This is so stupid! Why do I have to embroider pillows?” Yue hid her laugh behind her hand. Katara was always so fiery.

“Katara,” her mother scolded. “This is your wedding gift to your brother and his future wife. It’s tradition.”

Katara scoffed. “It’s a dumb tradition.”

“It’s Yue’s tradition.”

“That doesn’t mean it isn’t dumb.”

Yue couldn’t control her laughter, and a small giggle escaped her. Both women looked up at her in shock.

“It is a little silly,” she said with a shrug. Katara smirked at her mother, who only rolled her eyes. Still, Katara set down her pillow and turned her attention to Yue.

“How are you feeling?”

She shrugged again. She’d rather go back and marry a Northern man than talk about sex with her fiancé’s mother and sister. 

“It’s okay to be nervous.” Kya gave her a soft smile, very motherly. Well, she was going to be Yue’s mother pretty soon. “I was very nervous when I married Hakoda, marriage is scary.”

It wasn’t marriage that she was scared of.

Yue smiled shyly, “I’ve had my whole life to grasp the idea of getting married. It’s not something I’m particularly scared of, it’s not like I really had a choice in the matter anyway.”

The Chiefess frowned.

“That’s not to say I’m not proud to serve our people!” she corrected, she didn’t mean to make it seem like she resented her situation. “I’m just nervous about other things that’s all.” Shit, she didn’t want to say that.

Katara, bless her soul, looked worried for her. “What other things?”

Having sex with your brother.

“I’ve never showed my face to man before. Besides my father and little brother, that is.”

Kya looked at her with a glint in her eye. “Sokka will think you’re beautiful.”

Yue huffed. She wasn’t insecure.

“Unless you’re worried about something else.”

Katara rolled her eyes and looked away. Yue didn’t blame her. She understood Katara’s annoyance with her mother on this topic. She blushed and looked down to work on her last row for the third time.

“You don’t have to worry about that, Princess Yue. I made sure my husband has talked to Sokka about how to treat a woman.” Katara tsked. Yue suddenly felt tears sting her eyes.

She looked up. “Will it hurt?”

Kya looked over at Katara, who was now glaring at her half-embroidered pillow like it had personally offended her. “It shouldn’t. In fact, it should be very enjoyable.”

“Eww, Mom. I don’t want to hear about that for either of your situations.”

Kya smirked but remained silent. They all went back to their work.

Yue finished the last row with a small frown. The blanket was finished, and she was going to get married. She lifted it up and both women fawned over her work. Then she was sent to bed by Kya, she would have a busy day tomorrow.

…

Yue’s wedding outfit was white with blue stitching around the hemming. She had a matching hood and mask, and all of it was embroidered with small designs and some beading. She knew that Sokka would see her and be disappointed, but she wasn’t ready to reveal her face yet.

The Southern tradition was that Yue was to “hide” in her chambers and Sokka was to come “find” her, while her family “defended” her. It was strange, in her opinion, but Katara told her that it was all in good fun and Sokka was looking forward to it.

Though, as they waited in her chambers, her father looked at her with a disdain that matched her late mother’s.

“I can’t believe that you’ve let this go on for this long Yue. I thought that in the end you would try and do something to stop this wedding… for your tribe.” He tusked at her. “Your mother was right about you.”

Porak looked at her with a sadness in his eyes. Then, as if to cheer her up he said, “I’m excited to try and stop Sokka!” And with faux confidence he said, “He’s a pretty good fighter but I think I’m stronger.”

Her father huffed and complained about how savage the tradition was.

“I like it.” Yue said. Her father looked at her in awe, she hadn’t spoken out of turn in years.

“Well, then you’ll fit right in with the rest of your new savage tribe.” His eyes were hard as they looked at her, but she refused to look away. Not even when Sokka banged on the door or when Porak tried to freeze it closed. She didn’t break eye contact until her father did, when he left the room with Porak.

She looked over at her betrothed, to see him smiling nervously at her. She smiled back, but she doubted he could see it in her eyes. Was she really about to marry this man?

He walked over to her, turning his back to her and bending down. She climbed onto his back, and he stood up.

It was the next part of the Southern Tradition. He was to carry her all the way to the Ice Temple where the ceremony was to take place. Everyone else was either already there or would go by sled. It was going to be a long walk on Sokka’s back.

They didn’t say anything to each other until they were outside, Sokka trudging through the snowy trail.

“You look beautiful,” he whispered. He seemed shy. “Well, your parka is beautiful, at least. I guess I really don’t know what you look like.” His rambling was cute. “I don’t mean to say you aren’t beautiful! In fact, I’ve heard that you are, but I just haven’t seen you, because, well, you know…”

Yue squeezed her arms around his shoulders. She had never seen Sokka like this, all nervous.

“Are you going to wait for me to give you permission to speak?” He didn’t sound upset, just a little sad. She frowned behind her mask. “You know, after today you won’t need it anymore. You aren’t going to just not talk to me forever, right?” He let out a nervous chuckle. She buried her face in his shoulder, squeezing him tight.

It felt wrong to speak. It’d been ingrained in her. Wait. Know your place. Speak only when asked. The adrenaline of defying her father earlier was gone.

Sokka let out a sigh but didn’t say anything else.

She lifted her head back up and rested it on his shoulder. “No.” It was a barely a whisper, “No, I won’t.” She could see Sokka’s smile out of the corner of her eye. He seemed so happy, she wanted to make him this happy again.

“I know you’re upset that I’m still covering my face.” She didn’t know why she felt the need to say this. Maybe she just wanted him to understand, so that they could enjoy the ceremony and not have this between them. Or maybe she just wanted to keep talking so he could keep smiling. “All my life, I’ve always been told that my husband should be the first man to see my face…” she trailed off, suddenly self-conscious, but Sokka squeezed her legs in encouragement. “Please, Sokka, allow me to let you be the first man to see my face when we are alone… tonight.”

She thought that would make him happy. Shouldn’t he be happy that she wanted to only be his? But Sokka only sighed as he released some of the pressure, he was putting on her legs. He was disappointed in her.

“I don’t understand. Katara always told me that the mask was a symbol of oppression in the North… Why don’t you want to take it off?”

Of course he didn’t understand.

But maybe she could make him.

“How…” She took a deep breath. “How would you feel if you were to walk around shirtless?”

“I do walk around shirtless, when I train.”

Yue tsked. “Yes but, how would you feel going to dinner shirtless? Or going to a council meeting?”

“Right,” he drew out the word, like he partially understood but also didn’t. “But if I was shirtless, everyone would make a big deal out of me being dressed inappropriately. No one would care if you took your mask off… At least not here anyway.”

Yue frowned. The Southern Ice Temple was coming into view, and their alone time was running out. She didn’t want to argue with him, either.

“But… where I grew up, people would make a big deal if I showed my face. It’s not technically immodest here… but if you were to go to some distant land where they never wore shirts… Don’t you think it would be a little uncomfortable at first?”

Sokka gave a tight nod. “I see.”

Her face split into a smile.

“I’m just asking you for one day, and then I’ll never wear it again.”

This seemed to make him happy again, and Yue was glad. Maybe the ceremony wouldn’t be so awkward now.

They didn’t really talk the rest of the way there, but that was a comfort. Silence wasn’t awkward with Sokka anymore. Once they made it to the temple, the rest of their family was waiting for them. One of the sages was standing at an altar, with Katara and Zuko on either side, leaving enough room for the bride and groom.

It did not go past her, that Katara was staring at her hands while Zuko started at her, betrayal in his eyes. She would have to speak with Sokka about why Zuko acted the way he did, she knew Zuko must have told him.

Sokka set her down with a humph. Yue wasn’t heavy, per se, but he carried her for a long way.

Sokka took her gloved hand, and they kneeled before the Sage as he spoke, but Yue didn’t hear a word. Sokka was going to be her husband. She wasn’t going to go back to the North, she would live here now. She wouldn’t have the mask. She could speak when she wanted. She’d learn how to deal with a new oppression. She was about to have sex. She would have to have children. Sokka’s children, which Sokka apparently “couldn’t wait to have.” She was about to have two weeks, alone, with Sokka. Her husband.

He was her husband.

Husband. Husband. Husband.

The word floated around her head.

They were now pronounced husband and wife.

She was someone’s wife. What if she didn’t want to be someone’s wife? What if she wanted to be Yue. She knew what “wife” looked like and she didn’t want it. She didn’t want her mother’s life.

She looked up at Sokka, who looked just as scared. They’d just had a very productive conversation… maybe they could do this. He squeezed her hand in reassurance.

After the ceremony, her and her husband were to be paraded around the tribe before they would meet for the feast. The tribe members all had blossoms, and they threw the pedals at them as they passed.

She didn’t speak during the parade, but neither did Sokka, so she guessed that it was okay. She did squeeze his hand, which hadn’t left his since the ceremony, in thanks. He was the one who fought for the blossoms. They spent their time waving at everyone, the people she was meant to rule over. She didn’t even know them.

They were cheering for them. They didn’t know who she was, yet they were cheering for her. One of them, a young girl, asked her mother about her mask. One welcomed her with a fistful of pedals. One complained that they couldn’t see what she looked like. One said that her parka was beautiful.

Her parka is beautiful, not her. No one even knows what she looks like.

One told called her a Northern Cunt who has come to ruin the peaceful life they had built in the South.

Yue was very grateful for the mask. She didn’t have to hide her reactions with her mask. She kept waving through all of it, keeping her mouth shut.

The banquet hall was decorated beautifully and there were even more blossoms than Yue could imagine. They were placed at the head table, with Zuko to Sokka’s left and Katara to Yue’s right.

She is ashamed to admit that she spent most of the feast talking with Katara, she couldn’t even bring herself to look at her husband. Katara gushed that they were officially sisters now, which Yue had to admit was a bright side to all of this.

At first, Yue went to sign something to her, but Katara brought her hand to hers and stopped her. “You don’t have to do that anymore, you can speak whenever you want.”

But the truth was, Yue didn’t want that. She would miss their secret language that only they knew.

Everything was going to change. It already was changing.

After they finished eating, Sokka turned to her nervously.

“Was the meat to your liking?”

Yue smiled. Honestly, it was much better than the meat in the North, it was less tough and dry. But Sokka couldn’t see her smile.

“It was,” she said, stiffly. “Some of the best meat I’ve ever had.”

Sokka smiled at this. She had said something right.

“Yes, the South prepares meat much better than the North. I’m glad that you like it.”

Yue nodded softly. Really, what did Sokka want her to say? This was, technically, their first conversation as a married couple, and he was talking about meat?

There were dances performed and Katara demonstrated some waterbending with other masters. Yue could see her father from afar, shaking his head.

A line formed, and everyone greeted them and gave their congratulations. Nobles from all over the world were here, all bearing gifts. It was strange to be the one receiving, Yue had never been at the center of a “big event” for the nobles. The most she’d had was her private birthday ceremonies.

All too quickly, however, the feast came to an end. Katara gave her a tight hug, while Zuko probably hyped Sokka up.

“You’re going to do great,” she whispered in her ear. Yue only looked at her in fear.

The sage was waiting for them in Sokka’s chambers. Yue couldn’t look at him, which balanced out the daggers that Sokka’s was glaring at him. The sage reassured him that he would be behind a sheet, and he was merely there to confirm the consummation and was as equally uncomfortable. He bowed and hid behind the sheet. He could see their shadows, just as they could see his, but he didn’t make a sound. Yue could almost pretend that they were alone.

She didn’t want it like this. She wanted to be able to speak freely, to be able to enjoy her partner.

Sokka led her to the bed. “I guess we’re really doing this, huh?” he squeaked out.

Yue ignored it. She was a princess, she had plenty of practice doing things she didn’t want to do. “You can take them off.” She gestured to her mask.

Sokka reached up slowly, and his hand was shaking. “Are you sure?” He looked her in the eyes as he touched her mask, reaching behind her ear.

She nodded, unable to speak. His fingers brushed against her ear as he reached for the fabric covering her nose. She felt a jolt of electricity, she couldn’t believe the first skin he touched was her ear.

She held her breath as he took her mask of slowly. He started at her, wide eyed, as he brought her mask down and sat it beside them on the bed.

She felt so so bare. And Sokka was staring at so intently. But she forced herself not to look away and hide her face. She knew how badly he’d wanted this.

He lifted his hands up again, this time bringing them up to her hood and slipping it off, just as slowly.

For the first time, he saw what she truly looked like.

Her hair tumbled down. And he reached up to grab her pin-straight hair.

“You have white hair.”

Yue nodded. “I was touched by the moon spirit when I was very young.”

He moved to cup her face. “You are so beautiful.”

He leaned in, slowly, as if she were a wild animal, he kissed her cheek. Then her other one.

Her forehead, then her nose.

It was sweet. The way he looked at her with sincerity… it was too much.

She reached over and started tugging on his clothes. She needed the attention off of her. He brought his hands up to hers to slow her down.

“Please Sokka,” she whispered. Please let’s just get this over with. Please it’s too much.

But the way he suddenly looked at her made her realize he misunderstood her, again.

Sokka took his parka off, then his shirt underneath, until he was left just in his pants. He was… very big. He had a lot of muscles and on his chest was a large tattoo. There were a few on his arms as well. She wanted to reach out and touch them… but something held her back.

Deciding to join him, she took her own parka off, leaving her in her dress to match. He reached over and thumbed at the hem of her dress. “Is this okay?”

“Yes,” she lied, closing her eyes. She couldn’t look at him look at her.

No. It wasn’t okay. She didn’t want this. She didn’t want him to look at it. No, she wanted to be alone. She didn’t want to look over and see the shadow of a sage. It was too much. Him looking at her, she was showing too much. She didn’t know him.

She wished she had gotten to know him.

She opened her eyes and looked at Sokka. He kissed her tears as they fell. If only she had gotten to know him, she’d had so much time. But she was scared, what was she supposed to do…

Sokka looked down at her, she only had her leggings on and her wraps. He seemed like he was making a calculation, probably which one she would be more comfortable with off.

He reached down and slowly pulled off her legs, removing her boots with them. She was now only in her wrappings.

“Do you want to lie down?”

She nodded a moved further up the bed to sit down. She felt stiff all the sudden, like her bones were made of metal. She probably looked like a board.

Sokka stood up, but he wasn’t looking down at her, he looked at the sage for a brief moment, before walking over to his desk and grabbing a jar of something.

“I’m going to take off my pants now,” he said it like a warning. She was grateful for his warning. She nodded.

Yue looked up at the ceiling. She couldn’t look at him, it was too much. She could feel his eyes on her, but she forced herself to look at the ceiling. Sokka had a four-poster bed with light blue curtains tied open. The ceiling was blank, white.

“Is this okay?” he asked again. She could feel him touch the edge of her bottom wrappings. She nodded again, but didn’t look down.

Her wrappings fell away, betraying her. She looked up.

Sokka forced her legs apart, gently. She looked up.

A cold substance was placed between her legs, inside her. She didn’t know what it was. She looked up.

Sokka obstructed her view of his ceiling. She turned her head to the side. He’d had pelts up on his walls, probably one’s from animals he’d killed.

She felt something hard at her entrance. She knew what it was, so she forced her legs to open more and accommodate Sokka’s body. He moved slowly, like before. It hurt. If she didn’t have bones, then maybe it wouldn’t have. But she couldn’t remove her bones.

It was strange. In principle, she knew what sex was. But this was strange. Wasn’t it supposed to be enjoyable? Yue just felt cold.

She couldn’t image this ever being enjoyable, did Sokka find this enjoyable? She thought of the sage, did he find this enjoyable?

“Please, Yue, look at me.”

So, she did. His hair was still up in his wolf tail, and he looked at her differently, with pity instead of awe. A strand of hair had come loose, and he was sort of panting. She could understand why, he was moving quite a bit.

Suddenly, he stopped. His face scrunched up, like he was wincing, and she felt something wet inside her. He rolled off of her and plopped down.

So, this was sex. It wasn’t too bad. She could handle doing this again.

The sage poked his head out and Sokka jumped up, blocking her from his view.

“What are you doing?” he demanded.

The sage looked at him sadly, “I am meant to call for her healer when you are finished.” He then turned to the door and opened it, Healer Kyomo came in.

She had aged much over the years, and if anything, her eyes hardened as much as her heart. Yue wanted to laugh, knowing what was to happen next, and her legs falling open as if commanded. Of course, her father had one more trick up his sleeve.

“A healer? But I didn’t hurt her!”

Healer Kyomo laughed, she didn’t speak, but she moved towards Yue.

“She is here to check her,” the sage explained.

Sokka gasped and sputtered. “But you were here! You just watched the whole thing! I wasn’t told about this part of the tradition.”

“Sokka.” Yue addressed. It wasn’t a tradition. It was her father last attempt…

Sokka looked at her, fury in his eyes. She smiled at him, as the healer moved between her legs, hesitantly. They were expecting his fury. They wanted it.

If Sokka forced the healer away, then they could claim the marriage was null. They wanted the marriage to be null.

She forced his eye contact until it was over, neither of them said a thing while the sage and the healer bowed and left, both with a hiss of disapproval. Yue was free.

“Have you been checked before?” He looked horrified. Yue nodded. “When?”

“You know when.” She whispered, and he closed his eyes as if he was in pain. He walked into his washroom and came back with a steaming cloth. He wiped her all down silently, before closing all of his curtains and pulling her under the covers with him. He kissed her on the forehead once more and held her in his arms until they fell asleep.

…

Sokka was right, Mei Gao was beautiful. Yet, this wasn’t what she expected out of her honeymoon. To start, Sokka couldn’t even look at her. Not that she minded, she hadn’t covered her face since her wedding, and she felt very… bare.

During the sent off they had, Yue spent most of it tucked into Sokka’s chest trying to hide her face. That was the most she’d touched him.

The ship ride was strange, to say the least. Sokka took command of the ship and Yue spent her time on deck, looking out at the open sea. For the first time, the wind was in her hair, and she could breathe in the fresh air. It was a whole day’s trip, and she didn’t see her husband once.

Of course, when they made it to Mei Gao, they had to hike a little way. Mei Gao was a very small village, deep within the Southern Earth Kingdom. The lodge that they were to stay in was secluded and hidden within the trees. They had mountains surrounding them, and a small lake in front of the lodge. It was a small building, for a royal property, but there was a small house beside it where the servants and guards stayed. They would have their own cook and maid, but they were told to be discrete so the newly-weds would never see them.

The lodge itself had four rooms and a lot of open air. There was a dining room and a drawing room, but not much else. It was decorated very… uniquely, in Yue’s opinion. A mix of SWT and Earth Kingdom. And there were seashells. But also animal pelts.

Yue didn’t know what to pack for this trip, as she didn’t know the climate of Mei Gao, nor did she have a lot of clothes that didn’t cover her from head to toe. Luckily, her kind, loving, sister-in-law volunteered to pack for her.

Or that’s what she thought, until she realized that Katara only packed her a bunch of scrap fabric haphazardly sewn together. Which was okay, because that’s what Sokka wanted. He would want to see her in scrap cloth. They were married. And married men wanted to look and touch their wives.

But, apparently, Sokka was the exception. The first night, when they hiked to the lodge, Yue was expecting… well, she didn’t know what she was expecting, exactly. But Sokka telling her he was too tired and sending her to bed alone was not it.  

The next morning, he left her a note saying that he went for an early morning hike. Yue spent her time, in her lacy, see-through robe, lounging around the lodge waiting for her husband. He didn’t come back until the late afternoon. He didn’t look at her as they ate a late lunch together, and then he said that he wanted to read a book.

A book.

Yue wasn’t wearing any clothes, and he wanted to read a book.

And that night it was the same thing, Sokka’s hike was long, and he was tired.

The next day, Yue spent the day in bed. It was hard to get up. Her whole life she was told that her purpose was sex for this man, and now he didn’t even want her. She was told that men had absolutely no control over themselves when desirable women showed any skin. Was she that undesirable? Was their wedding night that bad? She thought—hoped—that he enjoyed himself. She was supposed to give him pleasure.

Sokka left her alone that day, doing who knows what, not even checking on her once.

So, here she was now. Third day into her marriage and all alone.

But she wasn’t going to mope all day like the last. She had wanted a beach, she had wanted to swim. So, she was going to swim, dammit.

Katara told her that she usually swam in her wraps, but Yue didn’t really find that appealing, then they would be all wet. She looked around, all the servants were in the second house, far away from her, and Sokka was… well, it didn’t really matter anyway. She walked out of the cabin in just a robe.

There were no waves at this beach and there wasn’t really sand either. It was mostly just really small rocks, but it didn’t hurt her feet. The water was crystal clear and very blue. She dipped her toe it, and it wasn’t cold. The climate here was pretty warm from what she was used to, but certainly not as hot as the Fire Nation. There was a breeze, but she didn’t feel cold. The water was a nice lukewarm.

She took a deep breath and looked around for anyone, just one more time, before slipping her robe off and leaving it on the beach. Then, she wadded out a little farther.

It was weird, she’d only ever been in a bath before, so this was the most water she’d ever been in. And while being naked was exhilarating and all, she felt very vulnerable. She decided to go in farther, until her shoulders would be covered.

Yue didn’t know how to swim, so she didn’t plan on going any farther. The water felt fantastic, though. She ducked her head under and opened her eyes. There were a few fish swimming around. When she couldn’t hold her breath anymore, she lifted her head up again and gasped for air.

Then she laughed.

It didn’t matter if Sokka didn’t love her or want her. She was in a fucking lake right now, alone and naked. She could do whatever she wanted. She was free.

She laughed and smiled, looking around her. There were trees everywhere, the birds were chirping, her wet hair was in her face.

Her arms seemed to float up on the water. She liked running her hands across the surface and making ripples. Then she thought, maybe her whole body would float.

She leaned back and brought her legs up. If she spread her limbs out, she could float on the surface. She was weightless.

She laid like that for what felt like hours. She watched the clouds move across the sky and the birds hop from tree to tree.

When she could no longer ignore the feeling of pruny fingers, she went to stand up again. But suddenly, the lake floor was no longer there.

Somehow, she’d floated to the middle of the lake.

Scared, she flailed her arms around to keep her afloat. She didn’t know how to swim. She let out a scream, but it was cut off by her head bobbing under the water. The freedom she’d felt before turned into panic. The servants wouldn’t be able to hear her from so far. And she didn’t even know where Sokka was.

Still, she tried to scream louder. Someone had to hear her. She couldn’t die like this.

Water was getting everywhere, in her eyes and lungs. She started to cough, it was getting harder to stay afloat. Her head had just slipped under when she felt a pair of arms wrap around her.

Her savior dragged her back to the beach, and she laid there, coughing up the rest of the water.

She looked up, suddenly embarrassed that one of the servants had seen her naked, but it was Sokka.

He was sitting beside her, head in his hands.

“Sokka,” she whispered. A thank you on her tongue.

“Are you insane?” he said back. “Are you trying to kill yourself?” He reached beside him and grabbed her abandoned robe, throwing it at her.

Quickly, she grabbed it and covered herself. Anger had replaced gratitude. “Why did you even save me?” she spit, getting up. “If I died, you wouldn’t have to be married to someone you hate!” She turned on her heal, and marched back into the lodge.

She didn’t cry. She just sat herself down on the couch inside and stared into nothingness. She was still wet, and her hair dripped down her back. Maybe she should’ve just drowned.

“That was the first time I’d ever heard you be so mad.”

She let out a dry laugh. “I was mad at you the night we were drinking.”

Sokka came and sound down next to her. “Yes, but even then, you didn’t yell. You insulted me very diplomatically.”

She didn’t know what to say to that, so she stayed silent.

Sokka sighed. “I don’t hate you.”

“You don’t love me.”

Sokka tsked. “That’s not fair. I don’t know you.”

She huffed. “We’ve known each other our whole lives!” She turned and looked at him. His eyes were wide, in shock or surprise. She understood, she’d never had this kind of outburst around him. She’d reserved her frustration to when she was alone with Katara.

“No, we’ve been around each other our whole lives. But you never say anything. I don’t know a single thing about you. You personally. Who you are or what you’re passionate about. I know that you like flower blossoms, but that’s only because you told someone else.” He looked down at his hands. “You never gave me a chance to know you.”

Yue curled in on herself. He didn’t get it. He never got it.

“I couldn’t.”

He nodded. “I know.”

“No, you don’t!” she screamed. Sokka flinched back, startled at her outburst. It wasn’t right, sure. But Yue had been so angry, for so long. And now that the lid was off, everything seemed to shoot out of her. “Did you not understand that my ‘chaperone’ wasn’t there to ‘protect my honor?’ They were there to report back to my father! If I had said anything, or if you had done anything that was even close to treason, my father would have ended the arrangement. He was waiting for you to mess up Sokka! Because he didn’t want the treaty to stay intact. To him, your mother forced him into a corner, and he was just waiting to get back at her!”

Sokka looked at her, wide eyed again.

“I couldn’t tell you that. I was always watched. And… I couldn’t let us slip up like that time in the weapons room.”

“But—”

“No, Sokka. I thought… when you started to bring Katara… I thought that you understood. But then… that night during the bending games… And I was just… I was so mad. I was so mad that you didn’t understand.”

 “But you broke the rules with Katara! You even created a language with her!” Sokka stood up while he spoke and pointed his finger at the ground. It was something she’d seen her father do.

“I broke my cultural rules with Katara, not the rules of the treaty. Katara was safe. No one watched my every move with Katara. Katara didn’t have the power to end the treaty!”

“We could have talked about other things. It wasn’t fair for you to assume that all I’d talk about was… was treason.”

“Please. To my father, talking about women is treason.” She took a deep breath. It was at the tip of her tongue, to tell him the whole truth about what her mother wanted. But she held her tongue, it didn’t feel like the right time to bring up her lessons.

Instead, she said, “You were the only person who I had the option of not speaking around.” Sokka looked at her, confused. “When my father gave me permission to speak, I knew not to waste it. But with you… I could not say something over and over again, and you would never punish me for it.”

 “Yue.” He put a hand to her cheek. “I’d never punish you. Ever. No matter if you yell or stay silent.”

Her eyes filled with tears, “Then why have you been avoiding me? Isn’t this some sort of punishment.”

Sokka pulled his hand away, as if she burned him.

“Is it because I didn’t please you enough on our wedding night, or because I wouldn’t take my coverings off, or—"

“No!” He grabbed her hands and put them in his. “Yue, stop.” He guided them back to the couch to sit down. “I haven’t been avoiding you.” She raised her brow. “Okay, maybe I have. But I saw what that woman did to you, and I couldn’t help but feel… I never understood you when we were growing up. But after our wedding day, I felt that I could, and I didn’t want to force you into anything you didn’t absolutely want.”

He was looking at her with pity, but she didn’t want it. She didn’t want to hear about how hard it was to grow up in the North. She already did that, but it was the right now that was hard.

“I want you, Sokka.” He gave her a sheepish smile. “I’ve wanted you since that day we ran away, and you tried to teach me to fight.” 

His smile turned real at the memory, but then dropped. “I find it hard to believe that you don’t hate me. I have been such an ass, Yue. About you speaking, about the mask… I was just another complication...”

“No.” She shook her head. “I was so mad. I was so mad at you. But the truth is, I could have told Katara to tell you what my family was plotting. I was mad that you didn’t understand. But I never gave you a chance either.”

Sokka started to speak, but honestly, Yue was done with this conversation. It was too much. She cut him off with her lips on his.

Her first kiss. She didn’t know what to do, so she pulled away quickly. Sokka looked at her with wonder in his eyes.

She turned away with a blush. “Will you teach me how to swim?”