Work Text:
Joker was down in the cargo hold for his daily sneaky smoke break, when the Normandy’s newest and most controversial crew member appeared.
“Oh, shit, Jack, I had no idea you would be coming down here.” Joker exclaimed, not bothering to hide his cigarette. He figured someone like her wouldn’t mind.
“This is where I’m going to be staying jackass, so find some place else to smoke behind Shepard’s back.” She retorted, snatching the cigarette from his mouth and putting it out. “Besides, that shit’s bad for you, ya know.”
“Wow, I didn’t expect miss damaged-biotic-badass-bitch to care about my health.” He said with an air of sarcasm.
“Whatever,” She nonchalantly replied.
“Oh come on, like you’ve never smoked.” Joker’s comment was not taken kindly by Jack.
“Why – because I’m all tattooed and fucked up? Look, buddy, I tried a cigarette once, and it was so fucking disgusting that I put it out on the jackass’ arm that suggested I try it.”
“Alright, alright, I get it,” Joker defensively replied. He sighed, “Give me one good reason why I should quit, then. Other than the 'it’s bad for you' cliche.”
“How about, because I think you’re fucking hot and don’t want to kiss an ash tray?”
And that was the last time Joker smoked.