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Nobody learned their lesson from the alien invasion, clearly, because the first thing the four of them did after losing a friend, saving the world and de-alien-ing their school was skip the rest of the day to buy shampoo at the 7-11.
Hey, what the hell. The four of them did all finish matrix high school with a minimum GPA of 2.9. Missing some fourth grade can’t hurt. Phil leans against the shampoo cabinet, suddenly exhausted. Well, it stands to reason that the last time he’d slept was being knocked out at Zone 5.1.
“Guys.” His friends all stop what they’re saying almost instinctually. Following the leader, he guesses. That’s… kind of weird. Even if it’s nice. Phred slowly moves his eyes from the shampoo bottle they’d been examining before the wave of tiredness hit to his face.
“Do… any of you guys feel kind of short?” Phil shrugs his shoulders, sagging further against the aisle and completely uncaring of the bottles pressing up against his hoodie. Smiley actually laughs a bit, whilst Phred and Zack stare at their legs.
“Oh. yeah, I do. Wasn’t I like six five?” Phred quips.
“Shut up, Phred, you were five six.”
“Okay, beanpole.” Fair, he was the only one broaching six feet out of the two of them. And nobody else. Turns out, blunt apathy isn't the best way to make other friends.
“No, you. Hey, Smiles, how tall did you get anyway? I don’t remember seeing you much after sophomore year.” Smiley makes eye contact. Whoa, her eyes are pretty.
“I’d transferred to do the APs I wanted. But I capped out at five four.” She sighs, smiling sheepishly. “Wish I could’ve been taller.” The gears started to turn in Phil’s head.
“I mean, you could try right?”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean- there’s all these studies with ‘possible’ ways to increase height but there’s no way of knowing whether they changed your predestined height, right?” Smiley nods, and her expression shifts, like they’re on the same wavelength. Zack instinctively reaches into his pocket for his phone, most likely. Shoot, Phil doesn’t have a phone! He’s nine! Oh god! Time to focus on anything else!
“But since we know my predestined height… we could actually try all that stuff! Phil, wait, this is awesome!” Phil can’t help but match the giant grin on her face. Phred looks on, puzzled at Phil’s weirdness probably.
We could all give it a go, right? Even you, Phreddy-” Zack’s playful elbowing is interrupted midway by Phred shoving one of the standing signs- ‘30 PERCENT OFF BUY 50 GET 20 FREE CHEETOES’ - up to stop him. Phred shrugs, and Phil nods in solidarity. Minimal effort retaliation for the win.
“It couldn’t hurt.” Phred says simply, lowering the sign. “Anyway, we came here for shampoo, right? My legs are getting tired. What’s your hair type, Sundae? All the bottles are labelled like that, and you don’t have hairfall or dandruff.”
“Uh, I don’t really know.” Smiley twirls around a length of her hair. “It doesn’t feel dry, but how would oily hair feel anyway?”
Zack pulls out a few other bottles while they try and figure out how hair feels. Phil’s dad has always been bald, and he hasn’t really felt his mom’s hair in… well, outside the simulation about two days ago. Inside it, maybe years.
Shit, mom. How’re they going to explain this?
“Hey, wait, what’s conditioner? Smiley, will you need that?”
“What’s conditioner, now?! Ugh!” Smiley smacks her head in exasperation. “Hair isn’t supposed to take this much work!”
“Dude, you did cancer research and you don’t know what conditioner is?”
“It’s not like they have anything in common, Zack!”
“Okay, guys, let’s not freak out Smiley. It’s not like she has any idea what we’re doing either.”
“Yeah, man, why’re all my friends bald?” She groans in jest. Mid-groan, she sees something out the corner of her eye. Something magical.
“Wait, this bottle’s got a dragon on it. And it’s like four dollars for the whole thing.”
“Holy crap, get it.”
“Conditioner is a worry for another day!”
“If that’s what you want, Sundae.” Smiley looks at him almost shyly. Phil feels shier around her, too. Just in a nice way. It’s good to be friends. Zack wraps his arms around her and clambers onto her back, and the four of them laugh.
It’s good to be friends with everyone, Phil thinks, taking Phred’s hand from inside his hoodie pocket in a way he hasn’t done since elementary. He can’t wait to live a post-Sim life with them all.
[ As it turns out, Smiley does have oily hair. One week and the frizziest hair ever seen later, the four of them break into the middle school’s computer lab to research more about hair. That, and the most prevalent ways to grow taller. ]