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How to (not) get away with murder

Summary:

"So, if I, hypothetically, choked someone so hard and ended up fucking his corpse without noticing... would you help me hide the body?"

"I'm not going to ask for details on you committing accidental necrophilia, but haven't we talked about safe sex practices?" Chan sounded calmer than Hyunjin thought he would be.

Or; Hyunjin accidentally chokes someone to death while having sex and he calls Chan to help him hide the body, Chan asks what the fuck happened and when Hyunjin explains, Chan teaches him how to safely choke someone and they fuck nasty in the made out grave.

Notes:

hi hello, this is me and my insane i-just-woke-up ideas getting actually written. also my ao3 debut woah!!!

ok first, i don't know how to actually hide a body, so this is not a tutorial. i mean it.

second, here i come with the "english is not my first language" propaganda but well, thanks to Jade oomf because they betaed the shit out of this fic, if this is not weirdly worded is for them, also to Alecs cuz he stopped playing lads to read this. ♡

anyway enjoy my deliriums on me liking dead things way too much, and follow me on twitter cuz i post really cool drawings heh

my twt

Work Text:

"Ah- yes! Just like that, Chan-ah! Don't stop... Why are you stopping? Oh shit."

A one-night stand, that's all it was ever going to be. Hyunjin went out alone on a Saturday night on his party duties, which was only meant to be a normal drinking night in the eyes of a normal person, maybe hunting for a hookup with no ties attached. This was one of those times when no one could keep him company to find a victim to shag with, and he ended up murdering someone.

Is it really murder if it was an accident?

The guy had been sneaking glances at him, if not the whole night, then most of it. When Hyunjin stopped dancing alone —like there was no tomorrow— in the middle of the dance floor, he decided it was time to start getting drunk and took a seat at the bar. The guy approached him from behind, placing a hand on his waist, getting too close to the limit of personal space to be heard over the music.

Hyunjin would have pushed him away the moment he felt the hand too close to his ass, but between the flickering lights, he could tell he was exactly his type.

He was a little shorter than him, well-built, with a big nose and a charming smile. His hair was a little bit out of his forehead and curled at the nape of his neck. Hyunjin let him in and accepted the drink he'd offered him.

A bit of small talk later, two shots of tequila that he let the stranger lick the salt off his hand, and a couple of not-at-all-obscene rubs on the dance floor, the guy found himself with his back against the leather seats of Hyunjin's car, his hard cock poking right between Hyunjin's covered ass cheeks. His hands clumsily unbuttoning Hyunjin's shirt buttons while leaving bite marks that would leave disgustingly hard-to-cover marks the next day.

Hyunjin was always rough with his partners. He liked to be thrown around and maneuvered into positions where his body would end up sore the next day. So when the guy told him to ride him while choking him, Hyunjin let out a moan of satisfaction as he wrapped his long fingers around the guy's neck while he was pounding into him, trying to take him deeper. The thing was, Hyunjin had never choked someone before; without realizing it, he was fucking away what little warmth remained in the inert body beneath him.

"Fuck. Shit. Okay, oh my god..."

Hyunjin didn't have time to panic; he had no idea how long it took for a body to start rotting. Rummaging through the pants somewhere on the floorboards of the car, he found the guy's phone and turned it off. He immediately reached for his own to dial the number of the only person who wouldn't freak out as soon as he told him what had happened.

He dialed the call; one and a half beeps, and it was connected. Chan always took seconds to answer when it came to Hyunjin, even if it was exactly 2:16 a.m.

Hyunjin didn't even let Chan say hello—or ask why he was calling at this hour—as he began to word-vomit everything that had happened the night before the situation he was now in.

"So, if I, hypothetically, choked someone so hard and ended up fucking his corpse without noticing... would you help me hide the body?" Hyunjin finished his rambling. There was no longer a trace in his system of the tequila shots and cranberry vodka from before since he had sweated buckets now

"I'm not going to ask for details on you riding a corpse and committing accidental necrophilia, but haven't we talked about safe sex practices?" Chan sounded calmer than Hyunjin thought he would be.

"Fuck it, fine. I'm calling Minho. I don't need a lecture right now." The phone was millimeters away from his ear when he heard Chan on the line again.

"Wait! I'll help you. Drive to the address I'll send you. See you in fifteen."

Hyunjin did what he was told and was now smoking a cigarette in his car, the windows closed, looking anxiously through the mirrors. Even with the cloud of smoke and though the body was now covered by his leather jacket, it continued haunting his existence.

In exactly 15 minutes, Chan was scaring the shit out of him as he knocked at the window. Dimpled and charming smile, meeting him as if the whole situation wasn't bad at all.

"Our Hyunjinnie... can't be alone for one night without turning his world upside down," Hyunjin got out of the car to throw himself into Chan's arms. He still didn't feel like bursting into tears for literally murdering someone, but a little support couldn't hurt—Hyunjin knew how to make himself small in Chan's arms anyway. The older man's hands, which were holding black bags, dropped everything to rest on his waist, leaving a few caresses to try to calm Hyunjin's state of alert. "Is that the body?" Chan asked quietly when Hyunjin left the hiding place of his neck. Hyunjin nodded and walked away, grabbing the bags from the ground while Chan opened the back door of the car.

"Where are we taking it? How do you know how to hide a body? Why didn't you report me to the police?" Hyunjin asked, now panicking.

Chan stopped carrying the corpse by its shoulders to cup Hyunjin's cheeks with black latex-gloved hands. "Shh, hey. You asked me for help, and I'm helping you. I didn't ask for details and you shouldn't, maybe just for now. I can explain to you later, okay?" Hyunjin nodded again as he was being caressed, the material felt weird against his skin but he didn't complain anymore.

While Chan did his thing, Hyunjin watched carefully as he broke the bones of the body's limbs as if they were wooden chopsticks. Hyunjin felt his cock twitch at the thought of him being that strong, but also by looking at how Chan's muscles were straining the sleeves of his shirt as he folded limbs to fit a doubled black plastic bag, twisting a few times before closing it.

"Okay, follow me closely and don't speak while we walk. It's a bit of a long way."

Hyunjin once again did what he was told to, carrying the leather bags as Chan guided the road to wherever they were going. The minutes felt like hours, but Chan seemed certain of where he was going. Hyunjin was deep in thought when he collided with Chan's hard back, who let out a muted chuckle that felt like he was making fun of him. Hyunjin felt his cheeks heat up.

"Now, help me dig."

More minutes passed that felt like an eternity, and Hyunjin couldn't with his arms any longer. He stuck the shovel into the ground and watched as Chan tossed the bag into the hole. He poked it a few times with the shovel and poured what Hyunjin later identified as compost worms on top of it, starting to throw dirt on top again.

"I'm sorry for dragging you into this..." Hyunjin murmured. He knew Chan told him not to talk, but he really didn't know the reason. They were miles away from society anyway.

"Listen, pathetic princess, if you're going to kill someone by accident, the first thing I expect from you is panicking and driving in front of a moving train, so calling me was the right decision. I'm partially proud of you for that." The bag was mostly covered in dirt. Chan dropped his shovel and sat next to Hyunjin, panting with exhaustion already catching up on him.

Under the moonlight, Hyunjin could perfectly see Chan's chest rising and falling, hugged and a little soaked by the compression shirt that clung to him like a second skin. He was starting to salivate and just remembered that he couldn't even cum because, well, you know why.

"What I'm not proud of is that I've explained to you a thousand times how to do things. Do I need to become an actual professor and give you a practical lesson so this doesn't happen again?" Chan looked at him, mockingly, with a cocky smile on his plump lips.

The whole situation was so funny to him.

Hyunjin had been so desperate to go partying alone just to get laid, and the poor victim of a stranger (r.i.p.) looking particularly like him, of course he was his first call. At this point Hyunjin was begging for it, that it came out in this kind of situation wasn't Chan's fault, but he wasn't the one to judge either. Or let it go to waste.

The second the question left Chan's lips and Hyunjin was hovering over, long legs trapping him and arms over his shoulders and lips brushing against the older ones.

"Please, teach me." That was all it took for Chan to finally crash their together.

It was messy, hungry, teeth and tongue everywhere, drool falling down Hyunjin's chin as he started to grind against Chan's growing erection, his latex covered hands traveling all down his spine to stay for seconds on his hips, leading a slow but firm pace.

A too strong squeeze on Hyunjin's ass made him moan out loud while Chan separated to catch his breath.

"First, you want to make sure your partner is in a comfortable position." As Chan spoke between pants, Hyunjin watched him intently, pushing Chan's shoulders lightly to help him lie down on the dirt beneath them, some leaves crunching against the weight on them. "Choking is to increase sensitivity, so you should make yourself feel good as well."

Hyunjin started running his hands down Chan’s body, noticing just now that Chan was in his pyjamas, finding the hem of his joggers and pulling them down, palming over the hardening cock that was trapped inside his underwear, while also untying his pants, wasting no time taking them off with a little of chan's rapid hands help. Hyunjin released Chan's dick from his boxers and spit on his own hand to start stroking him.

Chan hissed with the warm contact of Hyunjin's hand that collided with the cold breeze of the night, reaching for his hips to position them better, grinning at the feeling of lace under his fingers.

"Look at you, whoring yourself down to wear panties in the hopes that some random guy you don't even know fucks you right." Hyunjin whined, feeling trapped, warm already pooling down his belly, his throbbing dick staining the red lace. The friction wasn't helping at all as Chan also spit on his own hands, lifted him up a bit and rolled his panties to the side, spreading saliva on his rim to let Hyunjin position the thick length against his already loosened entrance from the encounter before.

“Chan, fuck- is too much, wait-!" Hyunjin let out a loud moan as he sank down, Chan helping him painfully slowly, shiver running down his spine as Chan was thicker than he imagined. Not even the biggest dildo he used when fantasizing about the older fucking him compared to his actual cock.

"You have no shame, thinking you have a word when you have your hole already stretched by some of my basic lookalikes," Chan huffed himself, roughly gripping Hyunjin’s hips as he bottomed out, breath hitting as he felt hyunjin clench by the call out.

"I- what?" Hyunjin panted in confusion, glossy eyes looking down at him. Chan ignored the question.

"Now, wrap your hand around my neck and try to find my pulse with your fingers." Hyunjin's breath was heavy, whimpering at every slight movement while his hand reached for Chan's throat.

"Do you think I haven't noticed? how your hookups always have something that resembles me?" Chan spoke again, starting to move Hyunjin's hips when he reacted, starting to move himself up and down, feeling Chan's pulse pumping down his fingerstip, "You are not as discreet as you think, Hyunjin-ah. Now press."

Hyunjin started at a steady pace, keen on the sensations surrounding him. It was almost overwhelming. The dead body down the mountain of dirt that was halfway covered, Chan groping his hips so hard he was sure it would let bruises in the form of his fingers, the cold air against his skin and wet sounds in the company of chan's satisfied grunts starting to fill up with the noises from the night. Hyunjin was a moaning mess that almost forgot what he was doing in the beginning.

"Squeeze harder, I still can breathe. Or are you afraid of killing me too–" Hyunjin complied, good at following directions, and one last time, he did what he was told to.

Closing his fingers as he rolled his hips and hyunjin was seeing stars, Chan's muffled moans were all he was hearing when he stared at him directly in the eyes, frantic pace that had both their skins slamming in an almost obscene scenario if someone found them like that, of the corpse decided to wake up and surprise them from behind for disturbing his rest.

Hyunjin didn't care at all. He was fucking his all-time crush, and he had him at his disposal. So when he loosened his grip and Chan was gasping for air, a gloved hand rose to his cheek to delicately brush his lower lip. Hyunjin took the tip of the glove and pulled it out with his teeth. The tiredness of the dig-in and the walk added to the feeling that he was close to come.

"Chan, Chan—I'm so close. Please, I can't do it—I can't do it." Hyunjin cried and heard a 'tsk,' and the second after, his face was against the ground, dry leaves sticking to him because of the sweat on his face. Chan manhandled him onto all fours and slapped the now-naked hand against his ass, the other hand pulling from his hair to yank him closer so he could whisper with a raspy voice against Hyunjin's ear. "You did great, baby, but I know you've also been waiting for this. So I'm not letting you forget that the night you killed someone was also the night I fucked you like you've always wanted."

Chan pulled Hyunjin's hair once again to make him look at him from the side, mocking him at his disheveled, sweaty, and dirty appearance, with leaves stuck in his hair and face, but with eyes so bright with desire and spit-coated lips, Chan almost came from only looking at how messed up he looked. Kissing him once again, Chan ripped Hyunjin's panties and slipped inside with a harsh thrust, letting out an ecstatic gasp that mixed with a moan into both of their mouths, fucking him at such a rough pace that he was actually afraid Hyunjin's moans would wake their companion.

Both men were so close, that when Chan wrapped his unoccupied hand around Hyunjin's neck and applied the slightest pressure Hyunjin came on the broken fabric and clenched around Chan's cock so hard that climax hit him too, bursting deep inside Hyunjin as he filled him up the last drop he had.

Hyunjin felt on his hands preventing his face from hitting the ground and Chan let his forehead rest against hyunjin's shoulders, leaving a small kiss as they both caught their breaths. Tremors were already flowing as Chan pulled out, giving himself a treat by spreading Hyunjin's cheeks to watch his cum pour out his hole, dripping whitish fluid down Hyunjin thighs.

"Chan..." Hyunjin whined and lied on the ground, breaking the other side of his panties and started to clean himself up. Wiggling his pants up and twitching through the lingering sensations of the orgasm when the fabric rubbed against the sensitive skin, Chan did the same and lied to his side.

"I cant believe we just fucked beside a decomposing body..." Chan let out an almost manic laugh, post nut reality instantly slapping him on the face. "I can't believe I killed someone." Hyunjin laughed too, cuddling to Chan's side.

"I still like you like that, my murder baby," Chan caressed his cheek, removing a few leaves that were still stuck to his skin. "Now don't get too comfy, we still have to finish the deal you started."

"Hm, he can wait." Hyunjin kissed Chan's lips and Chan followed the slow rhythm.

Hyunjin was right, the body could wait.

Snuggles were a mandatory step on Chan's "how to hide a body, choke someone safely and get away with murder" lesson.