Chapter Text
Awakened from a nap, Sheena felt a hand gently cover her eyes, a warmth that is both familiar and comforting. The scent that follows is unmistakable—a blend of salty sea breeze and the wildness of the ocean, mingling with a cologne she can never forget. It's as though the scent has been woven into her memories, a thread that always leads her back to one person.
"Bebe," a soft, sweet voice whispers in her ear.
Bebe.
Her heart leaps, and she swiftly pulls the hands away, spinning around to face the one she's been longing to see. There she is, the person who holds her world together. Without hesitation, Sheena wraps her arms around Gwen, hugging her as if they haven't seen each other in six long months, as if they haven't exchanged texts in weeks. The embrace is tight, filled with urgency, and bursting with a love that words can't capture.
"Bebe! Ang sama ng dream ko. Iniwan mo daw ako at 'di na kinakausap," Sheena confesses, her voice trembling with raw emotion. Known for her dramatic flair, she's never been so genuine and unfiltered.
"Aww, Bebe, that will never happen," Gwen says, her eyes softening with concern. It's so typical of her, always sensitive to Sheena's feelings, always ready to offer comfort.
"You know I'll never leave you. I'll always look after my Bebe," Gwen assures her, her voice a soothing blend of playfulness and warmth, her nose scrunching up in that endearing way that always makes Sheena smile.
Relief washes over Sheena like a wave. She can't help but strike a silly, adorable pose—hands on her face, nose scrunched up, dimples showing. She gazes up at Gwen with mischievous eyes.
"Kiss me, Bebe," she demands playfully.
"Mmmwwaaaa!" Gwen obliges with a dramatic, affectionate kiss on her forehead.
"Yey! I love you, Bebe!" Sheena exclaims, her heart swelling with happiness. Their love has always been this way—open, unreserved, overflowing.
"Bebe, I've got a surprise for you! Come on, get up na ikaw," Gwen says, excitement dancing in her voice as she pulls Sheena to her feet.
"Hala! I'm so excited, Bebe!" Sheena giggles as they walk hand in hand along the pristine beach. The sand is as soft and white as powder, the ocean a deep, inviting blue. Everything feels perfect, like a paradise created just for them. There's no need to worry about time or work—just pure, unadulterated joy with her best friend.
"Bebe, is this Islang Pantropiko?" Sheena asks, curiosity making Gwen laugh—a sound that is music to her ears.
"Parang Amanpulo naman 'to, Bebe. Parang mahal ang lahat!" Sheena added, whining playfully.
They continue walking, their laughter mingling with the sound of the waves. As they approach Gwen's surprise, Sheena's excitement grows. The place is everything she's ever dreamed of—fun, beautiful, and nostalgically perfect. Her heart races with anticipation.
But then, in a heartbeat, Gwen vanishes.
Sheena's breath hitches, her heart thudding violently as she scans the surroundings. Time slows, the scene blurs at the edges, like an old film reel. The once vivid colors of the beach fade into muted tones, and the soft hum of the ocean becomes an eerie silence. She turns frantically, her movements heavy and disjointed, as if she's moving through a viscous dream.
"Gwen? Bebe?" she calls out, her voice faltering, swallowed by the oppressive stillness.
Only the distant, indifferent crash of waves responds. Sheena stands there, enveloped in an overwhelming sense of solitude, the once-perfect paradise now marred by an unsettling void. The moment she cherished has slipped through her fingers, leaving her grasping at shadows, the warmth of her dream replaced by an icy emptiness.
—-
Sheena paces frenetically, her mind a whirlpool of distress. Beads of sweat gather on her forehead, tracing a slow, glistening path down her temples. Her heart hammers in her chest, a relentless drumbeat that drowns out any rational thought.
The island, the laughter, Gwen's embrace—it had all been so achingly real. Now, in the confines of an unknown room, the walls seem to close in, a crushing heaviness settling deep within her core. The dream fades, but the longing for Gwen gnaws at her insides, a relentless ache that threatens to consume her.
"Bebe? Are you okay?"
The voice cuts through her spiraling thoughts, startling her.
Gwen?
"Bebe, mag-practice na tayo. I'll wipe your sweat, ha?"
The words are comforting, yet they fall short of dispelling the fear. Sheena's breath is ragged, her heart still pounding with the echoes of the dream. She wants to voice her fears, to recount the dream's horrors, the gut-wrenching moment Gwen vanished. But words elude her, replaced by the visceral need to hold Gwen close, to reassure herself that this moment is real, that Gwen hasn't slipped away once more.
"Let's go na? Everyone is waiting for you!" Gwen's cheerful tone tugs at Sheena, pulling her back to reality. Confusion clouds her mind, but she follows, clinging to Gwen's presence as if it were her last tether to sanity.
But just as suddenly as she had found Gwen, she is gone. Panic grips her, an icy vice tightening around her chest. She spins around, her eyes wide with terror, searching the empty room. She opens door after door, her movements frantic, as if each room might hold the answer she desperately needs.
"No, no, no! Bebe?!"
Her voice echoes, hollow and desperate. She stumbles to another door, hands trembling as she flings it open, only to be met with empty space. The lump in her throat constricts, choking her, tears welling in her eyes. The silence is oppressive, a dark blanket smothering her cries. The floor beneath her seems to shift, a cruel reminder that she is trapped in an endless loop of loss and confusion.
"Bebe?! Where are you, Bebe?" Her voice fractures, barely more than a whisper now, as the darkness presses in. It's as if she is ensnared in a nightmare's cruel grip, each door she opens only leading to a deeper abyss. The dread envelops her, a suffocating embrace that makes her heart ache and her breath hitch.
"Bebe, please... magpakita ka," she pleads, her voice trembling as the shadows close in, and the dream's ghostly grip pulls her further into the nightmarish void.
——
"Hey, Shee," Sheena hears a voice, faint yet persistent, reverberating like an echo in a cavern. Even though it feels near, it seems distant, as if it's coming from somewhere far below. "Are you okay?"
The words ripple through her, distorted and heavy, like they're emerging from the depths of a well. Sheena's head turns restlessly on the pillow, her sweat cold and clammy against her skin. The voice persists, coaxing her out of the abyss of her nightmare.
"Hey. You're having a nightmare."
Her body resists, trapped in the liminal space between the dream and reality. Sheena feels as if she's struggling to swim through thick, viscous syrup. The voice grows louder, more insistent.
"Wake up, babe."
The words cut through the dream's grip. It's a man's voice, unfamiliar in its warmth and concern. Sheena's eyes flutter open, her vision initially blurred and swirling. Slowly, the world around her sharpens into focus—the room, the bed, the nightstand—all returning to their familiar places. But with this clarity comes a crushing realization.
So, it's only just a dream.
The laughter, Gwen's embrace, the warmth—it had all felt so achingly real. But now, as the dream's remnants dissipate, she sees John's worried face looking down at her.
Josh. Her boyfriend.
His eyes are filled with concern, searching hers. But all Sheena can think is how disorienting the shift from dream to reality feels. The weight of her thoughts settles heavily, and guilt coils in her chest.
Would she be a terrible person if she admitted that, deep down, she wished Gwen was here beside her instead of Josh?
Her mind drifts, the echoes of the dream clinging to her consciousness. Gwen's presence, her comfort, still lingers, but now it's overshadowed by a reality that feels colder and more distant. The realization wraps around her like a suffocating lead blanket, inescapable and oppressive.
She is awake now, fully conscious, yet the nightmare's grip remains. Gwen is worlds away, but the distance is not the only barrier. It is a deeper, more profound separation—Gwen's heart is no longer where it used to be. Sheena has felt this lingering fear since Gwen left, a void that words cannot fill. The silence between them has stretched into an unbridgeable gap.
Tonight, Gwen had returned in dreams, only to vanish again, each dream more cruel than the last, taunting her with a reality that will never be.
Sheena feels Josh's hug, but it is cold, just lifeless.
Hugs are supposed to be warm, aren't they?
They are meant to provide comfort, to chase away the loneliness. But this embrace feels like a cruel joke, as if she is hugging a corpse.
And oh, how she longs for the warmth of a ghost, a spectral presence that would offer solace where no one else can. In the cold embrace of her lover, her heart aches for the intangible comfort of someone who is no longer here. It's as if Gwen, who once filled every crevice of her life with warmth and light, has become an elusive phantom, slipping through her fingers like mist.
She imagines Gwen's ghostly presence, wishing for a fleeting moment of connection, something to chase away the shadows that have taken over her heart. This yearning for a presence she can no longer touch is both a sanctuary and a torment—- a hope and a pain intertwined. The thought of her beloved best friend, now a mere figment of her longing, only deepens the ache that resonates through her soul, leaving her to grapple with a world that feels impossibly cold and barren without her.
---
For days, Sheena carried the weight of her dream, a relentless burden that presses down on her chest with each breath. The images haunt her like shadows. Gwen, the island, the endless doors.
Gwen.
Island.
Doors.
The dream haunts her, replaying itself endlessly, a loop of anguish that both torments and terrifies. She fights desperately to hold on to the memory, to grasp at the fragments of Gwen's laughter and the warmth of the island, but they slip through her fingers like sand. The more she clings to it, the more elusive it becomes, leaving her gasping for breath. The dream was supposed to be a sanctuary, a place where promises were etched in the air and warmth was a given. Instead, it has become a cruel reminder of what is irretrievably lost.
She doesn't just want to remember—-she needs the dream to be real, to have Gwen back beside her, to recapture the moments that felt so true and comforting. The cold reality of her waking life only amplifies the ache, as she is forced to confront the void left behind, an unbearable expanse where once there was a promise of eternal connection.
Feels like summer when I'm with you,
Parang Islang Pantropiko.
But now, the warmth is gone, replaced by a cold void. Sheena stands on the sidelines of her own life, trembling, her world stripped of its vibrancy.
"Pantropiko, sad girl version," she laughed at the thought.
Taking a deep breath, her hand quivers as she reaches for her phone. Her heart races, a frantic rhythm echoing in her ears. She begins typing, each word a desperate plea, a cry into the void.
Sheena: Hi Bebe! I dreamt of you. Para tayong sa Island Pantropiko, pero parang Amanpulo naman yon, kasi parang ang mahal ng lahat. Hehe!
I miss you, Bebe! Balik ka na, di na ako galit :( .
Sent.
The moment she hits send, a chilling wave of shame washes over her, freezing her in place. She anticipates a short, dismissive reply, if she receives any response at all. She fears being seen as a nuisance, an annoyance. She wants to delete the message, to erase her moment of vulnerability, but she can't. The words are out there now, irreversible, and to unsend would only deepen her humiliation. So she waits, her heart clenched in her throat, obsessively refreshing her phone, her eyes locked on the screen.
But nothing comes. No response. Time stretches painfully, each second an eternity. She watches Gwen's stories, her comments, her tweets on X. She sees Gwen moving on with her life, while Sheena remains trapped in the past.
Still no response.
Tears threaten to spill, but she forces them back, feeling increasingly pathetic with each passing moment.
*Ping*
Her heart leaps, a flicker of hope igniting within her.
"New message from AAAA Bebe CCCC"
Her fingers fumble as she opens it.
AAAA Bebe CCCC: Hahaha!
That's all. After two days of waiting, two days of torment, that's the entirety of her reply—a hollow, dismissive laugh.
How did it end? How did their once-unbreakable friendship, a bond that felt eternal, reduced into this? A mere acquaintance? The weight of this realization crushes her, leaving her breathless and devastated. The warmth, the connection, the love they once shared—all of it is gone, leaving behind only a frigid, empty void where Gwen's heart used to be.