Chapter Text
The blood is pungent and threatens to tear a loud, wet retch from him as he scrubs his hands raw and red. He runs the bar of soap under his fingernails, rubs it against his palms, as the diluted water swirls around the ceramic sink and down the drain, but he’s only barely managed a dent in the crust encasing his skin. The flakes scatter like snow into the water. Again, he retches, louder, and acid hastily climbs to the back of his throat to make a home there as the animalistic moan bounces off the white walls.
“Hey. Stop.” Pale fingers clasp around his hands, prying the soap away from them to rest aside. He forgets he’s not alone anymore, and something in that is as terrifying as it is soothing. “You’re just hurting yourself like this. Be more gentle.”
“I can’t get it off,” he chokes out in a reply. He’d been screaming for hours after it happened, and now even a mere hiccup stabs into his esophagus, his voice coming out in sharp soprano rasps. “I can’t get the blood off.”
The fingers dig into his hands more firmly. “Breathe.”
He does, but it isn’t enough.
“You did what you had to.”
He knows, but it isn’t enough.
His trembling, abused hand is lifted, and cold lips press against the knuckles, smearing blood across them. He fights back a shiver. He lies to himself and says it’s out of disgust.
“Just let me take care of the rest.”
He will, but it isn’t enough.