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Scrumpy Drunk

Summary:

Draco gets drunk and a bit grabby - Harry has a solution.

Notes:

The characters aren't mine, I just borrowed them for a bit of fun.

Work Text:

When Ron had sworn that he could drink Draco under the table, Hermione and Harry were thoroughly amused when that did in fact happen. 5 glasses of red wine for Ron, 5 pints of scrumpy cider for Draco and 4 hours later found them both literally sat under their table at the pub they were in. Meanwhile Harry and Hermione were pleasantly tipsy as they ignored their persistent partners.
It wasn't until Draco was desperately clinging to Harry's leg in an attempt to stay upright and dignified and Ron failed to drag himself into his chair after three attempts that it was decided it was time to go home. And if the glaring patrons helped them in this decision they were not going to admit it.

Draco had made a grave mistake, he realised as he stumbled drunkenly beside Harry's more sober form. Why did he think he could beat the Weasel at drinking? Because he's Draco Malfoy, why else...
"You're ridiculously drunk, Draco." Harry commented endearingly as the blonde wobbled into Harry and began snuggling into his neck. "Come on, let's get you inside." He wrapped an arm around his waist, guiding Draco to the front door of their home.
"'m not!" Draco tried to sound indignant. "You tricked me!"
Harry chuckled to himself "I didn't trick you, I told you what you were drinking. You're just used to wine."
"Weasley called me a posh ponce." Draco pouted.
"That didn't mean you had to challenge him! Ron's going to feel rough tomorrow after all that wine. Then again, you're going to feel rough tomorrow after all that scrumpy."
Draco wrinkled his nose at the mention of scrumpy. Harry just laughed at Draco's misfortune. Harry had warned him that scrumpy cider was stronger than some wines, and the hops helped the alcohol along, especially when you weren't used to it. But he had challenged Ron and they had once again pitted themselves in a battle of wills.
"Well, wha was I s'posed to do?! Let him win!" Draco scoffed.
"You could always see it as you both won...?" Harry suggested.
Draco scoffed again as Harry opened the front door to their house and tried to assist his drunken partner inside.
Draco pulled away roughly "I can do it myself!" And promptly tripped on the step and fell flat on his face on the hardwood floor. Luckily, being so drunk and relaxed meant that he sustained no serious injuries. Although he would likely have purple elbows in the morning from breaking his fall.
"Ow." He moaned feebly. Harry sighed and dragged him upright. Guiding him to a sofa, Harry dropped Draco into it and left to make some coffee. He could do with some if he was going to have to handle a drunken Draco.
All the while Draco moaned about his stinging hands and hurting elbows. He eventually moved on to how he felt sleepy and hungry - a change from when he drank wine, which made him happy and horny.
Harry returned from the kitchen carrying a tray with two mugs of steaming coffee and two slices of chocolate cake. He found Draco inelegantly slumped in the armchair, slouched low in his seat, his blonde head was tipped back as though he was asleep.
"Draco, coffee. Drink." Harry stated shortly. Draco started, a little dazed, before taking the proffered mug and taking a slurp. Harry placed the tray on the coffee table and took his own mug before taking a seat on the sofa.
Now that he was home and consuming something other than alcohol, Draco appeared to slowly sober. He was halfway done with his drink before he noticed the leftover chocolate cake that Molly had made for his birthday a few days ago. Draco quickly exchanged his coffee for it, eating quickly and messily as his drunk limbs failed to cooperate.
Harry watched in surprise as Draco thoroughly covered his mouth and fingers with chocolate. The blonde was normally so neat and contained. Even his hair was messy enough to rival Harry's bird nest. Harry was about to say something when Draco began licking and sucking his fingers. He watched for a moment before he decided that maybe Draco should stop "Don't..." he said feebly.
Draco looked up in surprise before acknowledging Harry's dumbfounded face. With a smirk he set to removing the chocolate from his fingers as obscenely as possible, sure to repeat any actions that had his partner panting.
Draco's drunk brain quickly had enough of teasing and decided it was time to take things further. Draco got to his feet with a wobble and instead of prowling over to Harry as he had intended, tripped and fell sprawled on top of him.
"Draco!" Harry wheezed at the unexpected weight "you're still drunk, I think you need to go to bed."
Draco hummed in agreement and nuzzled his face into Harry's chest.
"No, Draco. To sleep. You're drunk and I'm not completely sober either." He wriggled out from under his boyfriend and dragged Draco upright. Half supporting him, Harry guided the blonde up the stairs to their room. But Draco had other ideas as he began groping Harry's arse and licking his neck.
As they entered the bedroom Draco automatically chucked his wand on the bedside table where, unbeknownst to either of them, it rolled along the surface and dropped in the gap between the wall and the table. He then grabbed Harry by the shirt and fell back onto the bed, pulling his surprised partner with him.
Draco immediately kissed Harry hard, his tongue quickly seeking out Harry's, the kiss going from searching and playful to hungry and hot.
After a moment Harry tried pulling away "Draco, stop. Not tonight. I promise we can do whatever you like in the morning."
"In the morning I'll be hungover." Draco stated shortly then shoved a hand into Harry's trouser pocket and pulled out his wand. With a practiced motion he waved it and both their clothes were gone. Harry couldn't help the groan that escaped him at the sudden skin on skin contact. Draco grinned at the response and threw Harry's wand to the side. There was a thunk as it hit something, but neither of them were interested.
Draco roughly grabbed one of his favourite parts of Harry, his arse, and pulled him closer, seeking his mouth again. Harry complied willingly now, unable to resist a naked Draco. But despite this there was a problem. Draco on wine was sexy and mostly coordinated. He became some sort of master seducer and Harry was a slave to his whims. Draco on cider on the other hand was sloppy, enthusiastic, and very grabby to the point of discomfort.
"Ow, ow, Draco, stop!" Harry looked stern as he knelt over the blonde, his hands pinned down so he couldn't grab any part of Harry again.
Draco pouted in return "You keep telling me to stop tonight." The pout turned into a sober looking frown. At this, Harry softened a little "You're just not your usual suave self tonight. I think in future you will have stick to wines and spirits. Cider you is not as fun as wine you."
Draco's frown deepened with confusion "Say that in the morning when I'm sober again."
Harry chuckled and placed a kiss on the tip of Draco's nose "I have an idea." He whispered, before hopping off of the bed leaving Draco lying there waiting. Harry returned with a pair of metal handcuffs. Draco's eyes widened "What are those?!"
Harry rolled his eyes at the pointless question and waited for Draco's brain to catch up. Sure enough, the blonde tried a new question "What are you going to do with those?"
With a grin, Harry crawled up the bed and looped the cuffs around a bar of their bed stead, then brought Draco's wrists above his head and shut them within the cuffs. The blonde gave an experimental tug and confirmed that he was indeed caught.
"These will keep your hands under control for tonight. They're a new idea that we are trying out at work. These cuffs suppress the wearers magic so they can't escape, even if they did have a wand. And they can only be released by using the correct symbol applied using a wand."
"You have a lot of problems with escaping criminals do you?" Draco's asked cheekily.
"More often than aurors care to admit." Harry replied with a wince. Clearly he had been one of those aurors.
"That's ok, you're still a rookie. So now you have me at your mercy Auror Potter, how will you punish me?" Draco enquired with a leer. Harry needed no more encouragement and launched himself at the blonde.

The next morning Harry awoke well rested and sated. Snuggled tightly into Draco's side he was comfortable and happy. He was also looking forward to enjoying his weekend with Teddy Lupin. He would come over for lunch on Saturday and be back home for bed time on Sunday, every weekend. Harry woke with these thoughts and a weekend of fun forming in his mind for his godson.
He was roused from his imagined plans by his stirring bed partner and after a moment, Draco groaned with pain.
"Ugh, I feel sick. And my head hurts. Why did I drink that cider."
Harry smiled at the blonde, completely expecting the hangover that he was sporting. Draco shifted and there was a 'chink' sound before he spoke again.
"Harry, can you untie my hands now?"
Looking up Harry realised that Draco's wrists were still cuffed to the bed. Remembering Draco had thrown his wand off to the side last night, he went in search of it. Only it wasn't on the floor under the window where he had expected to find it. Not under the open window. Harry instantly panicked, leaning out of the window to peer down into the shrubbery below.
He turned to look about the bedroom again, in the vain hope that his wand really hadn't been thrown out of the window. But he knew, there was nowhere else it could be.
"Harry?" Draco asked groggily.
"My wand, Draco! You threw it out the fucking window!"
Draco's eyes widened a little and his mouth made a little 'o' "You could always use mine?"
"That's not the point, I need my wand!"
Draco winced as pain lanced theough his aching head at the raised tone. "Can't you just summon it?"
"How!? I haven't got a wand!"
"I thought you could do it without!"
"Only when my life is at risk!"
"Well your life will be at risk if you don't get rid of these cuffs soon!"
"HOW?!"
"Use. My. Fucking. Wand." Draco hissed.
With a growl Harry marched to the bedside table where Draco normally placed his wand, but it wasn't there.
"Draco, where's your wand...?"
"What?" Draco yelped incredulously.
"It isn't here, and it isn't on the floor."
"Look for it, Potter, or I swear..." Draco grit his teeth and yanked helplessly on the cuffs, unable to describe the terrible justice he would exact.
Harry got on the hands and knees, searching desperately for Draco's wand.
Turning as much as the cuffs allowed him, Draco tried to look for the AWOL wand. Two things in that moment caught his attention. One, was his wand stuck behind the bedside table, two, was Harry's perfect naked arse stuck in the air as he search the floor and under the bed. Momentarily distracted by the sight, Draco was unaffected by being tied up, been though his arms were aching quite a bit now.
Eventually Harry returned upright, face flushed and glasses askew, his hair sticking up in all angles and speckled with dust. He looked devastated at having failed to find either wand and Draco found he didn't want to let him suffer anymore.
"I found it." He stated calmly.
"What?"
"Look behind there." Draco indicated with a nod of his head, trying to suppress a grin.
Harry looked and instantly found Draco's wand. With a huff Harry turned to the blonde "I'm not going to ask how long you knew it was there." Draco's grin broke, indifferent to Harry's chagrin.
With a sigh of exasperation Harry directed the wand at the cuffs and drew a complicated little pattern over them.
Nothing happened. He tried again. Still nothing. He frowned. Draco wasn't impressed.
"What!? Why isn't it working?" He grit his teeth a lance of pain shot through his head. Fucking hangover!
"Maybe it only works with my wand..." Harry mumbled to himself. He quickly summoned his wand, which soared through the open window and landed in his hand, a few damp flower petals stuck to it.
Once again he aimed it at the cuffs and drew the pattern that would unlock them.
Nothing.
"Potter..." Draco growled. "Get these off of me!"
"Erm..."
"Tell me."
"Well, I think..." Harry looked bashful now "I think these may be Ron's cuffs, so I don't know how to unlock them."
"WHAT?!"