Chapter Text
“What just happened, Shepard?”
“You sound angry.”
“No! I just never thought I would be in an armed standoff with someone I lo…uh…care about.” Kaidan looks away and stares out at the view of the Normandy docked in her bay.
What? Shepard thought to himself. Kaidan loves him? Even though Kaidan tried to correct himself, Shepard did catch the faux pas that he tried to brush off. I’ll think about that later. “Okay, out with it. What is troubling you?”
“If I didn’t back down first, I feel like you would have taken me out.”
“Never. I trusted you, Kaidan; I knew you would have come around. That’s all that matters. The thing is, we stopped the coup and Cerberus is off the Citadel.”
“Really? You still trust me after the way I’ve treated you? I don’t deserve your friendship, Damien. I haven’t been a very good friend to you in return.”
Shepard heart beats a little faster when Kaidan uses his first name. He’s never done that before. He’s always either called him Commander or Shepard, but never Damien. A sudden rush of warmth flows straight to his core. What? Where did that come from? Focus on what Kaidan just said. Something about friendship…No, don’t focus on Kaidan’s lips or cute chin dimple or the way his uniform outlines his ass as he paces…FOCUS, Damien, he mentally shakes his head to clear the sudden aura of arousal for the man in front of him. Man? When did that happen? He’s never been attracted to a ‘man’ before. Well…that isn’t quite true. There has only ever been one man that he’s ever thought of that way about before, and he’s standing in front of him. Ugh, can’t think about that right now. Eh… “What?” Damien says when he blinks suddenly at Kaidan when the older man looks at him worryingly with a question on his face. “What did you say?”
Was Damien blushing? Kaidan looks at his longtime friend, uh wait, acquaintance? No. Friend. He hopes so anyway. Damn! After holding a gun on him today, geez, he would just be happy to know him and say that he served with him once. Kaidan looks down and starts shuffling his feet. To be honest, he has always wanted more than friendship with Damien. He’s had a crush on him since they met on the SR1.
Kaidan looks up suddenly into beautiful green eyes when Damien steps forward and lays his hand on his shoulder to get his attention, squeezing it briefly before dropping his arm. “Hey, that’s over now, remember? We agreed to bury what happened on Mars and Horizon. You’re one of my friends, Kaidan. There have been ups and downs, sure, but I’ve always called you a friend, even a ‘good’ friend. Someone I feel honored to know.”
Kaidan looks at him and grins sadly, and then suddenly straightens. He says, “The honor is mine, Commander. I’m happy to call you friend,” and holds out his hand.
Damien shakes it and asks after holding Kaidan’s hand a moment longer than normal before dropping it, suddenly missing the warmth, “What was this really about, Kaidan?”
Kaidan starts pacing in front of him again and pauses to say, “Sometimes the way a thing goes down, does matter. Later when you have to live with yourself, knowing that you acted with integrity. It matters!”
Damien straightens from his stance and says, “You mean Udina. Do you think he was going to come in quietly? Kaidan, you had to take the shot. You acted with integrity. I saw the whole thing.”
Kaidan stops pacing and looks directly at him and sighs, smiling briefly and nodding his head, “Alright. Thanks. Look, Shepard, there’s another reason I’m here. Hackett offered me a position, but I would turn it down in a second if there was a chance that I could join you on the Normandy again.”
Damien smiles at him and he’s suddenly a little breathless, “I couldn’t imagine meeting the Reapers without you.”
Kaidan smiles in return, “Thank you, Commander!” and shakes his hand again before continuing, “And, Shepard, I need you to know that I will never doubt you again. I’ve got your back.”
“Good to know. Welcome aboard, Major.”
Kaidan comes to attention and salutes waiting for him to salute back before dropping his hand in recognition that even though he outranks Shepard, he recognizes that Damien is in command of the Normandy. “Aye-aye, Sir.”
Kaidan turns around and walks over to the duffel tucked away in the corner of the docking tube and without any hesitation like they had a will of their own, Damien’s eyes dip down to admire the contours of Kaidan’s ass as he bends down and unconsciously licks his lips. He quickly averts his eyes, when Kaidan straightens and pauses to ask him if he would like to accompany him onto the Normandy. Trying not to blush and suddenly really glad for the darkened interior of the docking tube, Damien nods and follows him into the decontamination chamber.
As they awkwardly stand next to each other waiting for the chamber to cycle, Kaidan covertly checks out Damien as he stares silently at the closed airlock door. Damien looks really good. He seems to have put on some muscle since the last time they were in the same room together. Kaidan wasn’t really in the same mind during the few hospital visits that they had prior to his discharge, so he can’t say for sure if Damien looked this good, previously. Taking a breath to try to clear his head of lustful thoughts of his Commander, he almost chokes when he inhales the scent of Damien’s aftershave. Oh holy hell, he reshuffles his duffle bag to the side of him to hide his sudden arousal that the scent has done to him. The scent the Commander is wearing is slowly driving him crazy. It reminds him of the salty sea air of home and suddenly Kaidan feels extremely hot and bothered. Trying to clamp down on his tight control of his biotics so as not to suddenly glow blue, he clears his throat gaining the notice of Damien. Before giving himself away, he tries to think of something to say and blurts, “So, anything I need to know about the crew? You know, that I wouldn’t have learned from the reports?” Smooth, Kaidan, really smooth, and internally flinches.
Before Damien can answer an electronic voice comes over the intercom, “Welcome back, Shepard. You have several messages, nothing needing immediate attention. Welcome aboard, Major Alenko. Do you need assistance?”
Damien flinches. Oh, fuck! EDI! Noting Kaidan’s questioning glance, he hurriedly says, “No thank you EDI. Please stay put until I update Kaidan on the current status of the crew. Thanks.”
“Logging you out,” EDI says.
“EDI? You named your VI?” Kaidan asks as they walk out of decon and instead of turning towards the bridge, they immediately turn towards the CIC and the elevator. “Aren’t we going to…,” Kaidan points back toward the bridge and the likelihood that Joker was in attendance since he never takes advantage of shore leave. Although, honestly, waiting for the inevitable crass comments from Joker about the conduct he has displayed towards Shepard recently, could definitely wait.
“Later. Let’s drop your gear off, first. I’d like to give you a tour of the ship. You weren’t here long enough last time to properly explore before our sojourn to Mars.”
“True.”
As they pass Samantha, Damien pauses to introduce her. “Specialist Samantha Traynor, this is Spectre Kaidan Alenko. Even though he also holds the rank of Major, he will be representing the council while serving on the Normandy. Kaidan, this is Specialist Traynor, our comms officer. She’s new to the field arena, however, she has excelled since leaving Earth and I’m privileged to work with her.”
“Thank you, Commander,” Samantha beams in a crisp British accent; she comes to attention and salutes Kaidan. “It’s an honor to meet you Spectre, uh, Major Alenko, Sir!”
Kaidan salutes her and laughs. “Just address me as Major Alenko while on duty, specialist. Off duty, Kaidan is fine.”
“Yes sir.” Samantha says flustered a bit.
Damien laughs, “Traynor, please contact Cortez and order the basics for setting up the Starboard Observation lounge as quarters for the Major for the immediate future. We are short on space at the moment for higher ranking personnel, so whatever you can order from the Citadel prior to our departure would be greatly appreciated. Also, unless anything comes up that’s a priority; I’ll be showing the Major the ropes for the next hour.”
“Yes sir.”
“Carry on.” Damien says and walks over to the elevator with Kaidan.
Kaidan looks at Damien and says quietly, “Comm specialist Traynor seems so young. I guess we are old soldiers, huh, Commander.”
Damien chuckles and joins Kaidan in the elevator pushing the button for the crew deck. “Yeah, I guess. Sam is older than she looks. She has a lot of potential and has become a good friend. I’m glad that she decided to stay on as my assistant. She’s a good addition to the crew.”
Kaidan glances quickly at Damien to see that he is genuinely speaking about the specialist like a protégé and nothing else. Sighing internally, he only nods at him. Good. No competition from the specialist, at least. They arrive on the crew deck and step out into a hallway. He pauses when he sees a memorial wall of sorts. He runs his eyes over the names recognizing almost all of them. His heart seizes a little when his eyes pause on Ashley’s name.
Damien pauses next to him. “This was Admiral Anderson’s idea. During the retrofits on Earth, this was constructed to honor those who lost their lives serving the cause, to include those from the SR1.” After running his eyes over all the names, also pausing on Ashley’s name, he says quietly, “I’ve added a few names myself to it, for those that have died since leaving Earth.” Then he brushes a hand on an empty slot, “Actually, I’ll be adding another name this evening…” and turns to the left to walk toward a room that opens to reveal a large observation window that looks out currently at the docking bay.
Kaidan follows him and looks around what he guesses is to be his quarters for the time being. Sufficient. Actually, more than sufficient. Roomy. He appreciates the seating area and the small assortment of real books in the corner. He puts down his duffle in the corner and walks over to browse the books currently residing on the shelves and recognizes a few that belong to the Commander, to include the book of poetry by Lord Alfred Tennyson that he remembers Ashley would carry around the SR1. His heart clenches at the memory and he turns away to look at Damien as he stares out at the view.
“Damien?” Kaidan says softly. “Are you okay?”
“Huh? Yeah. Let’s get your gear squared away. Follow me.” Damien says leaving the room and walking towards the elevator.
Kaidan follows him and waits quietly as they step into the elevator and descend to the cargo bay. When they arrive, a familiar scene enfolds and he grins when he and Damien step out and walk toward the ring of spectators observing the two familiar soldiers grappling on the sparring mats, in the middle of the cargo bay.
Damien sidles up to a dark skinned soldier taking bets on the outcome of the match and asks, “What’s the damage, Cortez?”
“The same as always, Shepard. Do you want in on the cut?”
Damien laughs. “Naw. No need to rub more salt into the wound. He should know better by now. Garrus is hard to beat.”
“Not for you. You always seem to come out the victor when sparring with him.”
Damien laughs wickedly this time. “Yeah, well, I’ve known Garrus longer. Besides, if James wants to be an ‘N,’ this,” waiving at the spectacle of Garrus kicking the Lieutenant’s ass, “will help him get ready for ICT.”
Cortez laughs, “True. Plus, as an added bonus, maybe getting his ass kicked will help humble that oversized ego of his.”
James says suddenly a little winded from the exertions of trying to avoid another hit from Garrus, “I heard that, Esteban.”
Cortez guffaws and then flinches when Garrus takes advantage of James’ moment of distraction and tackles him, throwing him to the mat, face first.
James groans and slaps the mat as a sign of having enough. Garrus bends over and asks him if he’s okay. He doesn’t move but his hand changes to a thumb up gesture and Garrus chortles as he straightens and comes over to Cortez barely winded from his sparring match, to ask about his winnings.
“You cleaned up well this time, Garrus. 300 credits.” Cortez says as he checks his datapad.
Garrus exclaims, “Nice. I can afford that new sniper scope I’ve had my eye on.” Then he notes the appearance of a new face grinning at him, “Oh, hey Kaidan, joining the crew?”
“Yes. It’s good to see you again in better circumstances, Garrus.”
“Likewise.” They shake hands.
Damien notes the sly look that Garrus gives him and looks at him questioningly. Then when Steve coughs, he says by way of introduction, “Lt. Steve Cortez this is Major Kaidan Alenko. He’s joining the crew. As a Spectre he’ll be representing the council while onboard. Kaidan, this is Lt. Steve Cortez. He’s our shuttle pilot and requisitions officer.”
“Welcome aboard, Major.” Cortez says shaking his hand.
“Lieutenant,” Kaidan says.
Damien laughs looking at the pitiful sight of James lying in the same spot he landed on, not having bothered to move yet. Pointing at him, he says, “I think you remember Lt. James Vega, right? He’s currently the lump of human flesh decorating the floor. Hey James? You alright? Need the doc?”
A grumbled ‘maybe’ comes from the floor. Damien chuckles and brings up the haptic display of his omni-tool and contacts Dr. Chakwas. “Doc says not to move. Stay put, LT.” Another grumbled ‘yes, sir’ comes from the floor.
“Hey, Cortez, can you hook up Major Alenko with some new gear and his choice of weapons? Also, did Specialist Traynor contact you?”
“Yes, sir, the requisition order is in and will be arriving soon. I’ll see that Major Alenko’s quarters are ready by the evening, sir.”
“Good man. Alright, Kaidan…uh wait, I’m getting a message. Just a moment,” and walks over to the side to read his message from Traynor.
After gaining the Major’s attention again after he looks after the retreating Commander, Steve grins at the good looking man in front of him and asks, “You served with Garrus and our Commander on the SR1, as I recall?”
“Yes, that is correct.” Kaidan says.
“You’ll have to tell me about it sometime. I bet you have a lot of stories about the Commander. There’s a below deck rumor, that I haven't been able to confirm, that our Commander isn’t a very good driver.”
Kaidan and Garrus look at each other and both look away to snigger. “Uh…” looking in the direction of the Commander over near the Kodiak shuttle, “I’ll have to get back to you on that later, Lt.”
Cortez looks at the two men laughing quietly and is about to ask another Commander related question, when Shepard returns and interrupts.
“Hey, Kaidan, sorry but I have to go. An emergent situation has come up that Commander Bailey could use my help on.” When Kaidan and Garrus look like they are about to ask if he needs their help as well, he puts out a hand and says, “Stay put guys. Thanks for the offer, but I’ll be fine. Garrus, can you finish showing Kaidan the ship and getting him settled with his transfer?”
“Yes, Shepard,” Garrus agrees.
“Great.” After nodding at Cortez he looks at Kaidan and says, “I’ll see you later, Kaidan. Glad to have you back.”