Chapter Text
It wasn’t until she was in mid-air that Toph had a moment to reflect on her choices. Was the criminal smart enough to be leading her towards a trap? It seemed unlikely; she and her squad had descended on him downtown, an area too well-populated and patrolled for any triad to gain footing, even now. And yet, he ran from them too easily, as if he had known what to expect. But it was too late to go back.
She landed, feeling the earth soften beneath her toes as she reoriented herself. Bunzo was just rounding the corner to her right; only three of her metalbenders were still in pursuit, a good fifty yards behind her. To Toph’s annoyance, the ostrich-horse cart she jumped over had swerved off the road where it now sat askew, the driver stirring in her seat. Not my fault, she told herself, vaulting forward to continue the chase. I cleared it by half a foot.
Bunzo was halfway down the next street by the time she turned, weaving in and out of a dizzying crowd. Toph knew it would be faster going if she simply bent a mound beneath her feet to ride on top of, but she couldn’t risk injuring any citizens. Not after last time…
Instead, she had no choice but to follow her target’s path. She spun to narrowly avoid bowling down a woman holding hands with a toddler and accidentally slammed her shoulder into a burly figure in the process. He fell to the ground on his bottom. “Police, clear the way!” she shouted, still running. The impact had made her head spin. She stumbled off the road and braced herself against a building, catching her breath. She could feel Bunzo taking yet another turn. He was hardly fast, and either too panicked or too stupid to use his firebending for a boost.
Toph shook her head and continued her own run. She gave chase for another two blocks, her breathing becoming strangely ragged. Her stomach seemed to be roiling as well. As much as she enjoyed the usual direction her sparring sessions with Sokka, she wondered if perhaps she needed to increase the intensity of the actual training component.
Luckily, the next turn Bunzo took led to an emptier street. Toph wasted no time bending herself off the ground, where she proceeded to use her metal cables to propel herself forward even faster. When she landed once again, she could tell that she had nearly caught up. He threw himself at the opening to an alley, perhaps hoping there would be a building he could hide in.
There was not. Only shut doors and a wooden fence that blocked any hope of his escape. Toph quickly stomped the ground to survey the scene; there was a fire escape ladder that hung close to the fence, but Bunzo seemed to be frozen. Then, in one quick motion, he crouched down and made to sweep his leg out.
She had sparred with the Fire Lord enough times to know what was coming. One well placed kick to the ground and she would be high above the blast, while also positioning herself at the perfect vantage to attack with her metal cuffs, shackling him. Yet somehow when Toph moved her foot against the earth, it rose up before her, as though someone else were bending it. She was thrown off-kilter, unable to catch herself. It wasn’t until her back slammed into the ground that she felt the heat rushing towards her. Instinctively, she raised her hands to cover her face, no time to do anything else.
The pain was immediate; a searing and stinging so intense she cried out. For a moment, she forgot herself—where she was, what she was doing. Then her senses came back all at once. Still sprawled on the ground, Toph moved to touch ground with the sole of her foot. She could feel Bunzo landing on the opposite side of the fence, as well as two pairs of footsteps running towards her.
“Chief Beifong!”
“Go after him!” she yelled. “I’m fine.”
They did not. How reached her first, putting a strong hand under her arm. “You need to go to a healer,” he said.
“Will you get off me? Bunzo’s over the fence already.” Yein reached the pair and put her own hand under Toph’s other arm. The two lifted in unison. Toph could feel herself flushing in humiliation. “Great, I’m standing. Can you catch our lead?”
“He’s long-gone,” Yein said. “We can’t sense him as well as you, and you’re hurt.”
Toph held up a hand, barely able to feel it. “I’m fine,” she repeated, trying to remember how to flex her fingers. That was a mistake. The sharp pain returned, and she could feel something oozing down her arm. The ground began to spin again.
“We have to take you to a healer. Now,” How insisted.
Speaking took an effort. “We’ve been staking out Bunzo for a month now. And where’s Ju?”
She felt Yein sigh. “She fell behind. Please, Chief, I’ll scale the fence and see if there were any witnesses on the other side. But let How take you. The sooner a healer looks at that, the better.”
“Fine.” How made to take her arm again, but she shook him off. “I’m not an invalid, I can walk.” She could feel pain in every step traveling up her back, but it was nothing compared to the throbbing in her hands.
The ride the to healing hut was quick enough, though she felt each bump in the road through her spine. She held her hands out in front of her, doing her best not to bend them at all; a queer tingling sensation seemed to be spreading from her palms. The healing hut was no “hut” in truth—just a one-story building that sat twenty blocks from the center of downtown. Katara had suggested keeping the name to make the transition to the city as smooth as possible for the waterbenders who worked there. As far as Toph could tell, it had worked.
The man behind the front desk led Toph to a curtained room immediately, where she was directed to sit in a half-reclined chair while he ran off to fetch a healer. How had opted to stay in the waiting room, which she was grateful for. Climbing into the chair with her hands as they were proved no simple task, especially given that her feet needed to leave the ground to do so. After a few minutes of awkward, undignified struggles, she at last managed to lean back against the thin cushions, utterly unable to “see” anything.
No sooner had she assumed her pose then she heard light footsteps enter the room. “Chief Beifong?” a soft voice called. Toph placed it as belonging to a woman of at least sixty. She took another few steps before tutting under her breath softly. “Well, let’s take care of those hands first.”
“Eh, who needs them?” she answered, her head hurting too much to form a proper joke. Had Sokka been there he would have thought of something more clever. They do come in ‘handy’ I suppose, she could almost hear him saying. She laughed to herself, though it was fortunately drowned out by the healer setting a basin down on the table next to the chair.
She gently guided Toph’s arms towards it. “Now this may sting a bit, dear.”
“I can handle it.”
Whatever Toph had been expecting, what she felt as her hands were submerged was not it. The agony was instantaneous, like knives were slowly being dragged under her skin. Yet before she could even cry out, the sensation changed. The water became impossibly cool, causing a numbness to spread up to her shoulders. As it warmed again, the pain and stinging was replaced with a gentle pressure, almost as though someone were holding her hands. Her head felt full, and she wondered if she might lose consciousness from the relief of it all.
“I’m Ahnah, by the way,” she said conversationally. “Nilak says you fell?”
“I tripped. Earthbending accident, that’s all.”
“Did you hurt anything besides your hands?”
Even lying down, the soothing water passing between her fingers, Toph could feel twinges in her back. Though she had suffered worse in practice, she was sure. “I don’t think so.”
The pressure up her arms faded, the water suddenly feeling still. Anhah pulled Toph’s hands out of the basin, turning them over to examine. “Well burns are easy, at least,” she commented. “But if you don’t mind, could you remove your armor so I can make sure everything else is alright?”
“How long will this take?”
The healer gave what sounded like an amused chuckle. “Not long, I promise. We just want to be sure.” She set the basin on the floor.
Toph sat up and quickly shot her arms forward, bending her armor open to reveal only a sleeveless undershirt. The metal suit came flying off and crashed to the floor a few feet from the foot of the chair. She heard Anhah gasp, which she found bizarrely funny. The healer recovered quickly enough though, gently guiding Toph to lean back once more. She had bent water from the basin around her hands, and took several minutes running it down the length of Toph’s body before asking her to lie on side, so that she might inspect her back.
Toph did as she was told with some difficulty; if only it was a chair where her feet could still touch the ground. Still, the sensation was somewhat relaxing.
“Do you fall often, dear?” Anhah asked solicitously. “This is your first visit here.”
She thought back to alley, the way the ground had felt like it moved. “Might have been dizzy.”
“Has that been a problem for you?”
“No..." Toph said slowly. “Well, I’ve been sick lately. Think I’m just still recovering.” For the past couple of weeks she had at least regained control of her stomach, though she still had odd, intense bouts of indigestion. But for the few months prior, not one day had seemed to pass where she could keep all her meals down. For two weeks she had told herself it was only a bug, but she at last admitted to herself that the stress of her job was probably getting to her. It couldn’t have been a coincidence that it was happening just as the reports of triad violence were becoming almost unbearable. Bunzo would have cracked the case wide open, she thought bitterly.
“Yes, well, that’s normal enough,” the healer answered kindly, removing her hands for a moment. When she touched Toph again to guide her onto her back once more, the water was gone. “But you really should be taking it easy.”
Toph laughed. “I’ll take it easy when I want the city demolished.”
Anhah clicked her tongue. “I’m sure there’s someone else who can be on the ground while you’re expecting.”
“Expecting what?”
The healer remained silent for a moment. When she spoke again, something in her voice had changed. “Chief Beifong...you’re six months along.”
Toph gripped the side of her seat and sat up. She knew what the words meant, and yet... “Six months...” she repeated stupidly.
“You’re pregnant,” Anhah concluded, moving a hand to Toph’s lower abdomen as if to make the point. “I’m sorry, I thought you knew.”
She found it difficult to form words. Instead, she shook her head slowly. “I’ve been stressed. This is stress.”
“Didn’t you notice..." The healer let her voice trail off before trying again. “Have you been spotting this whole time? If so you’ll need immediate attention.”
Toph tried to remember the last time she bled, but her mind was blank. How could I have been this stupid? “I don’t think so,” she managed.
“And you—you noticed your morning sickness, right?”
“I thought it was a bug,” she admitted.
Anhah touched her shoulder lightly. “Well, it does seem like it was unusually intense for you. I’m guessing you’ve lost weight? That may have made it difficult to tell, I suppose.”
Toph’s armor had felt heavier on her lately, though she doubted even weight loss was a reasonable enough excuse not to have noticed something growing inside of her for half a year. “I have.”
“And...have you felt the baby move? I’m sorry to pry, it just really is highly unusual not to know at this stage.” Anhah was trying her best, but Toph could still hear the judgement creeping into her voice.
“I have felt... something. I think. But I just assumed it was part of the same illness.”
“So you can’t say how frequently?”
She shook her head, her face growing hot.
“In that case,” Anhah said with a sigh, “we should consider this pregnancy high-risk. You definitely need to take precautions.” She withdrew her hand and Toph could hear her sit up in her own chair. “Don’t lift anything above ten pounds if you can help it, make sure you’re consuming lots of meat and dark greens, no substances...alcohol or pipe-weed or anything. And definitely limit physical activity. You shouldn’t be out in the field in your condition.”
Toph was gripping the arm of her chair so tight she wondered if it might snap. “I’ve been fine. Today was just a little too much, but I’ve been sparring—”
“Chief Beifong,” Anhah cut in sharply, “if you don’t take it easy, you could lose this baby.”
The impact of the words never seemed to reach her. She tried to imagine how she would feel if she did. Relieved. She pushed herself up and swung her legs to the side of the chair. “Alright, that’s a lot to consider,” she said dismissively.
“Wait, you’ll need a healer who specializes in prenatal care to check you out. We can set up an appointment today, if you’d like.”
“No,” Toph said jumping to the ground. It was slightly further than she had remembered, though the comfort of being able to sense the room again was worth the slight pain in her ankles from the landing. She bent her armor around her again, trying to ignore the headrush from all the sudden movement.
Anhah was on her feet. “I was going to go over your hands once more, too.”
“No, they’re great!” Toph insisted, flexing them faster than was entirely necessary. That brought a tingling sensation to her fingers, but otherwise she would never have been able to tell that they had been burned. She raced out of the room while the healer offered her futile protests.
How was still in the lobby, a magazine in hand. “You,” she barked, “get back to the station.”
He jumped out of his chair and offered what might have been a salute. “Are you alright?”
“Let me handle it, Dad,” she said sarcastically, striding towards the door. She was worried Anhah might try and catch up. At least the Council pays for my healthcare. The idea of receiving a bill for such a trip seemed almost cruel.
“Okay,” How answered with a nervous laugh. “Let’s go then.”
She pulled him outside before saying, “You’re going back alone. I uh...have a lead I need to follow up with.”
“Oh. Do you want the ostrich-horse then?”
“Steering it would be a neat trick," she said, waving a hand in front of her face. "Take it back to the station."
Toph remained on the sidewalk until How had left in the cart, just in case he had it in his mind to follow her. Then she began to walk towards the docks. The streets were busy, but no one troubled her. The area by the docks was usually full of visitors, with shipping merchants exchanging boxes on the wharves. It had seemed like yesterday that Toph’s triad investigation had taken her onto the more heavily-crewed boats. Could it really have been six months? The thought now made her feel sick.
She made her way to a smaller pier at the southern end of docks where a sailboat waited. “Chief Beifong!” a voice called from its deck.
It sounded familiar, no doubt an acolyte Toph had met before, but she had no memory of her. “Hello there,” she answered, trying not to sound awkward. “You waiting for someone, or can you take me over?”
“We can make the trip,” the acolyte confirmed. Toph heard her footsteps coming down the ramp. The acolyte then helped guide her back up it, onto the wooden boat.
Toph always found the ride to Air Temple Island irksome for that reason. It wasn’t a long enough trip that there were any seats on the deck, so she always had to content herself to stand gripping the railing, unsure who was coming and going before her. It had been several years since Aang had settled onto the island, and in that time she had gotten good at estimating how long it would take to reach it, though it never seemed to make it any better, no more than flying on Appa had ever been comfortable for her.
The trip proved to be worse than most others. There was almost no wind to speak of, which not only meant it would take longer than normal, but that all three acolytes onboard needed to row, leaving Toph completely alone. “Six months,” she mumbled to the wind. Had there truly been something inside of her for that long? The concept seemed strange. She touched her stomach as if hoping it would provide insight, but her metal armor felt as it always did beneath her fingertips.
She wondered if it had felt this alien to Katara, at least when she was carrying Bumi. It hadn’t seemed to; if anything, all three of her pregnancies had energized her. Even Aang’s night terrors during the late months of her pregnancy with Tenzin, which she had confided to Toph after one particularly restless week, hadn’t hurt her mood. Toph knew Katara certainly had worries of her own, yet she could feel a kind of glow about her each time.
All Toph had felt for the last few months had been exhaustion and illness. What kind of monster is in here?
Before she could consider her parasite further, she felt the rowing slow. The same acolyte came back over to where she was standing while the other two took care of tying the boat at the docks. Toph allowed herself to be led down the ramp. She thanked the acolyte and then turned to trudge up the path to the buildings. She was already halfway up when it occurred to her that Katara might not even be home. Aang would definitely be at a Council meeting; it was all he seemed to do anymore. But his wife’s schedule was more fickle. Even with a three-month-old, Katara didn’t like to stay idle long, though Toph supposed that her absence at the healing hut was a good sign.
She had barely reached the top of the path when she heard an excited voice call out, “Aunt Toph!”
Kya was running in her direction, as fast as her five-year-old legs could carry her. Toph laughed and scooped her up when she reached her, only then remembering the warning the healer had given. Oh well, the damage is done. What happens, happens. “What are you doing here?” Kya asked once Toph put her back down. “Is Daddy coming home early?”
“I doubt it. I need to talk to your mom.”
“She’s inside,” she answered, turning and skipping back towards the center of the island. Toph followed dutifully, trying to ignore how absurd their procession was. “I learned how to do the water whip!” she added.
“Not bad at all,” Toph said. “You’ll be able to take on Bumi pretty soon. Oh, speaking of...” As they drew near the practice yard, she could feel Bumi practicing his stances, his usual wooden sword in hand. Katara usually had to fight with him to remove it from his pants any time they’d leave the island. “Hey kid,” she called.
“I’m not allowed to fight him, Daddy said,” Kya told her in a low voice, as Bumi dropped his sword to run over.
“Aunt Toph! Can you bend a rock at my head? I’ve been practicing my rolls.”
Somehow Toph doubted that Aang would approve of that much more. In a different mood she might have done it anyway, but Bumi’s idea of practice was not something she wanted to test. “Maybe later.”
Bumi frowned, but then unceremoniously threw himself to the ground, where she felt him writhe around for a few seconds before slowly picking himself back up. “See?” he asked proudly. Kya giggled.
“Wish I could,” Toph quipped, waving her hand in front of her face. “Your uncle teach you that move?” She had seen him catch his boomerang in a dive before, though she found it hard to believe it was something he considered worth teaching a ten-year-old.
“No, but he taught me a warrior’s wolf yell. Want to hear?” Before she could answer, he tossed back his head and gave what might have been a howl. The noise was piercing and seemed to reverberate in Toph’s skull. Or had she already had a headache?
“Bumi,” Kya said, still laughing, “Mommy said you’re not supposed to do that without Daddy’s permission, in case the acolytes are meditating.”
“What, you going to tell on me?”
Kya stopped laughing and shoved him instead. “I won’t.”
“Meditation is boring anyway. Right, Aunt Toph? It’s just sitting.”
“It is just sitting,” she confirmed.
Without warning, Bumi let out another howl, causing Kya to collapse on the ground in laughter. Toph brought a hand to her temple. “I think I’m going to—”
“Bumi!” A familiar voice called out. Toph felt Katara storming out of the nearby dormitory. “Tenzin just fell asleep and now you disturbed him...oh! Toph!”
“He doesn’t look disturbed,” Bumi pouted as his mother came nearer.
He was right, Toph couldn’t help but think. Had it not been for his comment, she may not have placed the lump she sensed Katara carrying as his younger brother. So far, Tenzin had proven himself to be an unusually quiet baby, rarely crying, even before a meal. Toph had only witnessed it a couple of times, and even there, his cries seemed softer than she remembered Kya’s sounding. It was just as well; Aang was doing enough crying for all of them these days. Her friend claimed that he had named his son ‘Tenzin’ for his peaceful nature, but Toph knew he was scrutinizing every breath the baby drew, just as he had with the other two.
“What are you doing here?” Katara asked once she reached them. She put her free hand on Kya’s head. “Is everything alright?”
“I uh—had some free time,” Toph offered.
“You never have free time.”
“Because she’s catching bad guys! Pow!” Bumi clapped a hand over fist. Tenzin gave a small cough.
Katara sighed. “You two should go back to your training. It’s almost time for your history lessons with Amra anyway.”
Kya went skipping off without another word, but Bumi threw himself on the ground for another ‘roll.’ “I’m going to be a cop and catch the bad guys too!” he said from his knees.
“Bumi, your shirt,” Katara chided. “Don’t do that again.”
“I have others,” he protested. “It’s what I’m practicing!”
“Why don’t you practice what you were told to?”
Toph could feel her headache building. “Want me to put Tenzin down while you’re sorting this?” she offered.
“There’s nothing to sort,” Katara answered, though her tone suggested it was for her son’s benefit. “Bumi knows what he needs to practice, and he’s going to go do that, and the acolytes will tell me if he does anything else.”
“Is Uncle Sokka coming over tonight?” he asked, making no move to leave.
“I’m not sure. He might.”
“Because I want him to show me that two-handed slash again.”
“Well unless you practice now, he’s not going to show you anything.”
“What?” Bumi exclaimed, suddenly sounding on the brink of tears. “But...but…”
“Bumi, you don’t need to argue. Just go do what I’m asking,” Katara said, sounding exasperated. That finally made him turn and run off, though Toph had the sneaking suspicion that once they were indoors, he would go back to tumbling on the ground again.
“It’s relentless,” Toph said with a laugh as they walked towards the building.
Katara sighed again. “Bumi has a lot of energy. Some days it’s easier to get him to focus it than others.”
I didn’t just mean Bumi, she thought. “You must be tired.”
She slid the door open and let Toph walk ahead of her before answering. “I’m fine. Tenzin’s such an easy baby. He even goes back down right away after his feeding in the middle of the night; that helps.” She kissed the crown of his head, as if that emphasized her point.
“Yeah, but is Twinkle Toes helping too?” Toph asked as they entered the master bedroom. There was a baby hammock in the corner of the room, though Katara instead opted to sit in one of the upholstered chairs with Tenzin still in her arms.
“He does what he can,” Katara answered, while Toph took her own seat. “It’s—It’s hard for him, I know. There’s so much on his shoulders.”
It sounded like something Katara had likely been telling herself for some time. “I guess the Council is always busy,” she offered, unsure how else to respond.
Tenzin gave another small cough and Toph heard Katara kiss him again. “He keeps me going,” she said, wanly. “I’m sure in a month or two things will calm down.”
At least this baby is manageable, Toph thought. She wondered what the odds of her soul-sucking parasite turning out the same were. Her face must have betrayed something because Katara leaned forward slightly. “So why are you here? You’re never off the clock this early. Is something going on?”
“I... I had an accident at work,” she started, searching for the words.
“Are you okay?”
“Yeah.” Toph thought about mentioning the burns first, to explain why she had gone to a healer. Or maybe opening with her fall. Was it worth explaining who Bunzo was? “I’m pregnant,” she blurted out instead.
Katara sat up straighter. “What?!”
Well, I guess that’s that. “Yup, I’m pregnant.”
“I… You’re… Is this from the accident?” she asked, her voice suddenly grave. “Toph, tell me what happened.”
It took a moment for her to realize what Katara was implying. “Oh no... No. I’ve been pregnant for six months. I just fainted today from it, that’s all.”
“Six months? Why didn’t you tell me?”
Toph shrugged. “I didn’t know until today. I went to a healer after my fall.”
Katara leaned back in her chair. “How is that possible? You didn’t notice that you weren’t…?”
“Guess I just didn’t think about it.”
“But Toph, you’re normally so in-tune with yourself. You have to be.”
She squirmed in her seat. “I knew something was off, but I just thought I had a stomach bug. Or stress or something. I’ve been losing weight, you know.” It almost sounded reasonable when told together.
“I suppose...” Katara shifted in her chair, ignoring a small gurgle from Tenzin. “But...wait. Who’s the father?” There was an urgency in her voice.
“Don’t worry, it’s not—you don’t know him.”
“You’re sure?”
Toph thought back to her ship inspections and laughed. “Yeah, I barely know him.”
Katara paused for a moment. “You’re not still together?”
Her laugh grew louder. “Nah, didn’t exactly...work out.” He had been nice enough, and she had made sure to make the most of his three days in the city, but since his ship departed she hadn’t given him a moment’s thought.
“But it’s only been six months,” she insisted.
“It wasn’t ever like that.” The last thing Toph needed was to romanticize the conception.
“Well, have you told him?” Katara asked, sounding confused.
“I came straight here.” Though why she did that was beginning to escape her.
“You should go see him next. This is going to be a lot to take in.”
“Why? He’s not the one who’s pregnant.”
“Toph!” Katara scolded. “He’s going to be a father.”
Toph gave another shrug. “It’s not like we’re going to be raising this kid together.”
“You don’t even want to consider that?”
“Not really.” Kanto had been entertaining, strong in all the right places, but she wasn’t even positive he fully spoke the language. Their conversations had been limited to only a few words and that had suited her just fine.
“Well I think he has a right to know.”
“Then by all means, keep telling the fathers of your children,” Toph said sardonically, her annoyance rising. She heard Katara scoff, but didn’t care. “I’m the one dealing with it, not him.”
For a minute neither woman spoke, but then Katara sighed. “A baby is not an ‘it’, Toph. “Have you even considered what raising a child alone might be like? Is this what you want?”
“I...” Toph frowned. “I guess so. I mean, I didn’t really think about it.”
“Well, you need to. There’s options. And even at six months, you wouldn’t have to...” She paused. “Whatever you decide, it needs to happen sooner rather than later.”
Toph suddenly felt tears stinging her eyes. She wiped angrily at them with her palm. “I don't know, what should I do?” Her voice sounded small.
“Toph...” Katara said sympathetically. She then moved closer and extended Tenzin towards. “Here, hold him.”
Toph carefully took the bundle of breathing blankets. “What is this for? I’ve held him before, you know.”
“Just...consider him. Think about the responsibility. A baby is completely dependent on you at all times, and that can be really overwhelming, even for me.”
Tenzin wasn’t asleep, Toph could hear from his breathing, yet whatever point Karara was trying to make fell flat. He was barely moving, and the idea of such a lump overwhelming anybody seemed absurd. “I know what a baby is.”
“But you don’t,” Katara responded. “Until you have one, you don’t.”
Toph considered that, trying to connect the serene bundle in her arms to the thing growing inside her stomach. It did no good; it still seemed like some foreign, abstract concept. Is that how mothers were supposed to feel? She had a hunch Katara wouldn’t think so. “I’ll figure it out,” she said shaking her head. As if in response, Tenzin stirred and gave a hiccup.
Katara leaned over. “Was that...?”
“It was just a hiccup,” Toph told her.
She put a hand over her mouth. “I shouldn’t—” She stopped herself and sighed again. “It’s never easy, Toph.”
Tenzin made another small noise before turning ever so slightly. His warmth seemed to be penetrating through her armor. Well when has anything ever been?