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Another later-than-planned night at the office. The sunset glows reddish orange over the horizon as Robert walks, grateful he had a little more time to soak up some Vitamin D before he catches the bus. As he walks each step, his mind drifts away, feeling the meditative state creep over comfortably, like the hoodie he wore over his sky-blue SDN shirt.
All that is largely interrupted by a presence that creeps up next to him. He can only ignore that for so long. His pace ambles out of habit, like the man needed it; despite the tranquillity of the walk, he has to address the large floating action figure.
Especially since Beef is barking with acknowledging at the shadow behind him.
"Phen, I know you're there this time."
"Apologies. I had some difficulties approaching you, Robert." The shift had gone smoothly, as well as the first wipe does on the shitter.
Robert inwardly shrugs, trying to remind himself that the man has some alienations... he re-frames that, thinking that it is an endearing trait, instead. He can only be so grateful that their night together wasn't directly in the spotlight the next day at work.
Small mercies.
"Ah, who is this?"
"My dog, Beef." Robert notes that his dog had taken a shining to Phen immediately, trying to jump up at his cape, yapping as he does with a new face. "Good dog."
He trusts that instinct.
Phenomaman reaches down and gives Beef a friendly greeting by offering a closed fist. Beef licks it happily, wagging his tail.
On seeing that, Robert gently goads him, tone lilting on what he hopes is friendly curiosity. "What're you doing following me home?"
He stands up again, albeit less hunched over. "I would like to... do this thing humans do, talking."
"Okay... why are you acting like you're scared?"
"It is because I am, Robert."
Robert tilts his head in concern. "Okay... why? You can be frank with me, Phen." Notably, they now both walk side by side as he slowly makes his way to the bus stop.
"Frank? Who is this Frank?"
The night sky's early stars twinkle in reclamation. Another late-night, Robert supposes. "It's a human expression; it means that you can be honest with me."
"Honesty? I am always honest. It is a hero trait, as I am told."
"It also means you can say things on your mind, and I might not get offended." Robert shrugs. "Well, I'll try not to be."
"Ah. Thank you for the explanation."
"Yep."
Phen stands up straighter, Robert arch his neck looking up. "Our night spent together exploring one another was... enlightening, Robert Robertson. it has taught me more than I ever expected from someone without powers."
Robert's head swivels around frantically. He didn't see anyone, but to be certain, he says, "Just a little more quietly, okay? I'm not really about another public, uh—anything." He hurries to fix that, not liking the idea of the fallout. "I'd like to keep my job."
Subtlety is another weakness of his, he thinks. He shouldn't be this surprised.
Phen nods solemnly, even if some confusion is still written on his face. Robert sighs, searching his mind for the right words. Alien or not, he knows the look of a man's mind in strife.
"I know. It was... something. But I can tell you're still thinking about her."
A small gasp. "Has working at the Superhero Dispatch Network bestowed you the power of mind-reading?"
"Nah. Human relationships tend to be complicated. When you date another human, you have to deal with both the good and the bad. Seems like you're no different, Phen."
Big shoulders sag. "It is like you say. The unquestionable urge to fly into the sun and absorb its radiance has abated. But my whole body, it feels very unlike myself. I want to do that much, much less. but it's like a cacophony of... what is the term."
"Voices?" he supplies.
He holds up a large hand. "We have this sixteen-legged creature back in my homeland. It is quite beautiful, they are small, but—"
"Spiders?"
Phenomaman tilts his head. "How many legs?"
"Doesn't matter." Robert scrunches up in his face in the idea of a spider being beautiful, but he doesn't comment. Takes all kinds.
"They are often known to chitter very early in the morning. I think it is known on earth as a cock."
Robert laughs. "A rooster, yeah."
"They are quite loud, to the decibel level of an aeroplane. If one sleeps, they may be roused from slumber by it."
"That. Genuinely sounds awful."
"Ah-ha. And that is my head, perhaps." He reaches for Robert's left hand, bringing it between their bodies, his eyes betraying desperation. "How do I make them stop?"
Robert stops, looking up in befuddlement at the larger man. He considers the facts: knowing what he signed up for - a rebound. Robert sees it coming a mile away, in some faculties he's still Phenomaman's boss, but in the moment it still stung, like stepping on a Lego.
Or a sea urchin.
The moment isn't about him, though - he remembers his first break-up. It's the reason he avoids white rum.
"It's okay to feel the way you do, Phen. We humans all kind of do, at some point. The main crux of being human doesn't seem to be unique to just us... I guess."
"You guess?" Phen scrunches up his nose. "These are wise guesses..."
Robert continues. "Just... Been there. The breakup going viral also hammered you down into nothing. You've got a lot of things to catch up on. No one can really blame you, but they did anyway."
There's a length of contemplative silence. The big man's expression shifts as if he is intently concentrated.
"You've never gone through a breakup before, huh?" Robert says.
"Yes. I had come to care very deeply for Blonde Blazer." Phen looks down at him. "How did you know that?"
Robert sighs, his ambling slowing to a stop. He sits down on the gutter. Seems like the best time as any for an unregistered and unfiltered deep-and-meaningful. Phenomaman joins him, and he looks silly sitting on what looks like a four-inch stoop. He suppresses a chuckle.
"Sometimes... People go through shit. And shit tends to sling everywhere. Feelings aren't straightforward, Phen. People sometimes want different things."
"I did not seem to understand why she wanted what she wanted."
Robert lets that breathe, before continuing, "You were let go at DTLA because your actions afterwards... Well, do you know what a 'fall from grace' is?"
A groan of annoyance. "It is something I had read in my perusal of the news..."
"Again, it's hard. I'm not saying it isn't. It's rough. Sometimes, two people find out they're not compatible in the end. And that's okay, too. There's a lotta people on the earth."
"But that's... How could we not be...?"
"Look, Phen—you don't have to tell me the whole story right now. But listen closely, okay? This is the important part: It's how you deal with the after that makes you who you are."
"Why is that?"
"Well, your personality isn't just you say about yourself. You have to prove it with your actions afterwards, too. If everyone bankrolled, believed and did what everyone said about each other, it'd be perfect. Idyllic, I think."
"But..."
"But if they did, and they were dishonest, which they might be, there would be a lot more villains, Phen."
"Hmm... That does make a lot of sense."
"There's a lot about us that makes us who we are, Phenomaman. And... For the record, if you'd like to use your words, I can be here." Robert looks into the darkening night sky, watching a star as it snaps out of the light. Well that's not foreboding. "As long as it doesn't interfere with mine and your job, we can make this work."
"Do humans talk about separations frequently?"
"Yeah, big guy. It's called therapy. Getting therapy. But you're lucky I'm not charging you by the hour." Robert looks into the distance, seeing his bus stop and go. He looks back to Phen. "Besides, looks like you're starting to accept it. You used 'had'."
"But that is the issue," he laments, head in his hands. "I do still care."
"And like I said..." Robert puts one hand on his shoulder, trying to keep things friendly, trying to redirect. "You do. And that's perfectly okay."
"How do I make it stop?" Phen's voice breaks.
Robert's lip curls up in sympathy. "There's a chance it won't. Things might not be normal for a while, especially if you don't have a lot of proximity between you, seeing her every day. And—and, yes, while it helps, being apart only softens the blow. It won't fix anything."
Phenomaman lets out an uncharacteristically sad sound, looking up at what used to be Mecha-Man.
"Things are just different, after. It takes time, man.... phenoma-man. You can care for her, it'll just be... a little less."
The large man just looks glum. "I would like to say that I understand. But in this moment, I do not."
"That's okay, too. Just, no more public incidents, okay? We like to use this concept called redirection to use your energy in a more practical way. Harness your emotions and throw yourself in work. Or..." he shrugs, "We can just keep on using plain ol' words."
His face lights up. "This is very generous of you. Truly, your stature does not quite make obvious the depth of your compassion."
Robert lets a small chuckle slip through. "Do you know what back-handed compliments are?"
The next day, Robert arrives early and places Beef and a wrapped dog snack in Chase's empty cubicle, before Blazer stops by.
"So... After-hours talk with Phenomaman, huh?"
The cameras. Of course. Robert suppresses the urge to sigh and faces Blazer head-on. "Yeah. Second-pep talk. He's holding a lot of pressure. I helped him out a little."
"That's... Kind of you, Robert." She smiles. "Way more than I expected."
He tries not to think about the word pressure. Like explodes. Like cum. "It's the least I can do."
"You really care about the team, and I think it really shows in your actions, Robert."
He shrugs a shoulder. "It's a work in progress. They all are."
"I had plans, too, but I had to come back to the office to check on the alarms." She crosses her arms. "Glad no one tried to break in last night..."
Ah. He winces. Yeah, well, he tried. "Sorry about that."
She chuckles, shaking her head. "I know. Can't be helped, sometimes the man puts his mind and forgets about everyone else. Was the talk productive?"
He places his headset snugly on his head, giving her a sheepish look. "I guess we'll see today."
As he shuts the door to his apartment, he lets Beef down, giving him head scratches.
"Hey, little buddy. You think that was a good shift?" Beef looks at him, tongue wagging out of his mouth. "I think so, too. it's hard sometimes, but I think we're getting the hang of it." He sets out some dry food, but Beef curls up on his pillow and lowers his head. Too spoiled by treats and finely cut bacon.
"Yeah, me too." He yawns.
He'd been gracefully dropped home the other night after his talk with Phenomaman when he was going to take the bus, which had been a pleasant surprise. After flipping on the kitchen lights, he stretches, feeling his back crack from the inevitable lack of stretching in his red office chair.
Another shift, and his thoughts drift back to that night, and he swings his jaw to the side in contemplation.
A lot has happened since the first shift, and things were finally starting to look up for him, HR violation withstanding. He taps on the kettle and stretches his neck side to side.
And then, there's a quiet rap rap from the door. Bracing himself, he looks through the peephole and sees a logo.
Like, a Phenomaman-shaped logo.
Oh, brother.
Opening the door, he witnesses the HR violation in question standing up straighter. He's still dressed in his superhero outfit, which is not an ideal scenario.
"Hello, Robert. Would it be amiss to allow myself inside your apartment?"
Oh, crap. Of course, their talk the other night means he'd know where he lived. "Uh. Good evening to you too, man."
"I would like to... talk, with you."
Robert peeks his head out. All seems clear, but noise complaints had already been filed. He'd been lucky to scrape past that one still unmasked. "All right, but no comments about the state of the place."
Phen floats inside, his eyes adjusting quickly to the dark light. No bed - just some pillows and a very juiced Beef ready to greet him. No furniture.
In lack of a comment, He reaches down to give Beef head pats, and Robert sees that as he closes the door. His dog yips and lays back down, still clearly pooped from a long day of cuddles.
Surely anyone who gets along swimmingly with Beef can't be so bad. Maybe just a touch misguided.
"So… what's up, Phen?"
"Robert. It is good to see you well."
"Good to see you too, but what's the occasion?"
Phen's face shifts to one that's dire. "That was a preface. I would like to attend therapy."
Robert chuckles again at this bizarre situation he's found himself in. All sides of the barge bombarded today, and he isn't sure he likes it. "I'm not a therapist, Phen."
"But your words, they were encouraging. I had much to think about."
Robert sighs, for what feels like the tenth time tonight. "Okay. I haven't eaten yet, is it okay if I make something for myself?"
"That is—yes, of course."
And with that, he trips the kettle's on switch again, and there's a strange, stilted silence settling between the two of them amongst the rumble of the kettle and the highway traffic outside as Phen stands in the doorway like a mannequin between kitchen and the rest of the apartment. It is so strange that he has to bring it to light.
Robert crosses his arms. "What are you doing?"
"Waiting."
"We can still talk, you know."
"I would... I would rather wait until you are finished. It is the same scenario repeating itself where I was broken up with."
Oh.
"Oh... right." Good thing he's a fast eater. He still tries to make conversation, though. "Good shift today. You know, you almost made it without mentioning that night once." He'd cut Phen off in the comms as he tried to allude to that night, but no one but Visi seemed bothered by that, especially the way they're still adjusting to a disgraced superhero on the Z-Team.
"I do seem to recall you saying you did not want that to be, 'common knowledge'."
Robert's face hardens. "It's not like that, not really. This," he gestures between them, "isn't breaking any HR regulations, per se, but outing that information absolutely does. I don't want to break any more than I already have."
"That is a fair compromise."
As the kettle clicks off, steam rises. He pours the boiling water into a cup with dry noodles, slowly adding sauce to it.
"Ah, yes," he perks up, "Spaghetti."
"Uhm. Not quite." Robert eats fast, feeling ravenous and under-equipped for this situation, but calories should help.
He hopes. Being in closer proximity with the alien seems to have loosened his discomfort more than the actual act of sex.
Weird. Might be the weirdest thing he's thought in a while.
He tries not to think explicitly about that night, but it does come up.
Like a penis, which isn't burgeoning in his pants. Good, he thinks.
He burps, placing the cup in the nearby bin. He doesn't dwell on the fact Phen was staring the entire time, like a little lost puppy.
"So, words. Let's talk philosophy." If Phenomaman didn't know what that meant, it didn't show on his face. "Sometimes... Talking about what happened can help, too. Maybe you'd like to start with that?"
Phen lowers his head. "That seems reasonable. In Tokyo, she said she'd like to talk. And we did, which has ended in disaster."
"Well, you're safe here. You've already hit rock bottom."
"Rock...?" he says, before blinking away the metaphor.
"Your lowest point. It can only get better from now on."
Phenomaman's expression curls into introspection, before he continues the story. "As we ate, she mentioned she would like to be Mandy, on occasion. I didn't understand—and I still don't—if you are blessed with the ability to protect the public, would you not harness it? She wanted to, do less. To be Mandy, her human form. We were a fantastic duo." He whispers the last sentence.
Contextually, that meant Blazer. And so, the pieces fit together a little better with less duct-tape and rubber bands. She wanted to settle down. This explained a lot more than Robert knew.
"I don't think that's the point, Phen," Robert says, not bothering to offer him a seat or anything. His fortnightly pay check hadn't come in yet, and he doubted whatever was left could materialise furniture. He shimmies past Phen, sitting down perpendicular to the screen doors outside, and Phenomaman follows suit, cross-legged in front of him.
Brown eyes regard the rest of his empty yet cramped apartment, but this figures. Personal space is a concept he'll get the man acquainted with eventually.
"What point is that?"
"I don't think it'll land for you right now, but... it sounds like she didn't feel like she could be herself."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, I don't have powers. But I do have an idea... uh... People with powers often have an identity they may want to conceal, or keep separate from their hero self," he muses over the wording, "it's a concept. Not everyone wants to be on the cover of a magazine with their real face. Or, you know, have enough courage to," he offers that part as a distraction, trying to blow that mistake over.
Phen's gaze trails off into the air, like he's thinking of someone else. "I-I saw your scars. They are not typical." Seems like Phenomaman is a bad liar.
"Well, whaaat do you mean by that?" he lilts. He's not a great liar either, but he tries.
"You also have a secret identity."
Robert wipes a hand down his face. "Great. Does everyone know?"
"I am unaware if others know."
He has to ask Blazer later if any of the walls are soundproof at SDN.
"Well... anyway," he says awkwardly, "People want different things. People, also might want to... shake shit up."
"I thought I was unshakeable." Phen's voice trembles, and there are two, tiny tears leaking from his eyes. "Until that moment."
His heart warms at the idea of a hulking 6'4" superhero bawling his eyes out in the pithy floor of his apartment. He smiles gently, knowing Phenomaman wouldn't see that. Robert gets up and hands him a roll of toilet paper. Hey, still fresh, right from the cardboard box he had sitting right outside his bathroom. 2-ply, not one.
He's not an animal.
Phenomaman's sobs seem to reverberate across the entire apartment, and Robert sits back down to place a hand on his knee, the closest thing in proximity. Hands find his before Robert realises, and he can't bring himself to take his away.
He dabs the entire roll on his face, wiping away big snotty tears.
"I am sorry."
Another number to scratch off the card, too. "It's fine, Phenomaman. Seems like you're just as human as the rest of us." It's almost cute, if not for the boogers under his nose.
Phen's hand is warm over his, and he looks down, trying to find the right words. "Being sad isn't forever, either. You'll find your passion again, and you know, it might not be superhero work, right now, and that's okay too," he says. "You'll heal; you'll take each day one step at a time. I believe in your ability to, big dog."
Mopey grey eyes stare at him down past the toilet roll. "There's always room to grow, personality-wise, Phenomaman. You're not done yet."
"You are right. This is not landing."
"Hey," he reframes. "That's fine. You are safe here, if you want to let it out."
"Thank you," he sniffs, and that toilet roll is putting in work as half of it looks soggy down to its core. "One more question, Robert." He sets the roll down, using two hands this time to twine with Robert's. "What is... settling down on a couch, with a beer? Does it have some other meaning?"
"Nope. Just what it is. And if there is, I don't know."
"I would like to try that, someday."
He sits back against the wall, and Phen's hand follows his as he shuffles forward. That seems to have a different meaning, but Robert ignores it, focusing on their conversation. "Well, not because of Blazer, right? Just for the sake of it?"
"I have not done any of those things. So, to grow as a... person, I would like to try."
Robert chuckles. "Yeah, we can find you a new girlfriend you can do that with. I don't have a couch." Again, late night talks bring on more and more questions about the superhero. "So you've never gotten drunk before, huh?"
"Alcoholic imbibing, you are meaning?" Robert nods. "Ethanol is not compatible with my physiology to reach such a state."
"Damn," Robert pulls his hand away, feeling especially crestfallen at that information. And it wasn't even about him. "That's kind of sad."
Phenomaman's tear-streaked face, however, is the opposite. "I am feeling better already, Robert. You are good at this."
There's a genuine smile on Robert's face as he regards Phen. "Thanks."
"And... what if I do not want a new girlfriend to do that with?"
Robert gestures helplessly with his hands. "I didn't mean right now. Break-ups roll out a lot of emotions you gotta work through."
"Are you not yourself right now?"
His face shifts to suspicion. "I—Why would I not be?"
"Robert," Phen tries, sitting up straighter. "We are more compatible than I expected. The other night has many moments of evidence of that."
He chuckles, and suddenly the room feels a lot smaller. He's not staring back into grey eyes like he cared, or anything. "Oh, you are trouble. Lucky I'm at home."
"And you have no bed. Is that by choice?"
Robert can't help himself with a grin. "I thought we were just here for a talk?" His mind casts back to the pale usage on Toxic - yeah, that was a whole heaping pile shit of a mistake. "Plus, do you sleep?"
"I do, yes. I recall us talking about cocks that wake us from slumber."
He snorts. No fixing that now. "Well, it's late, Phen. Humans need sleep, too. Can't afford whisking me off into the night sky this late."
His brain belatedly supplies that he had been flirting.
Another problem that he blames on being touch-starved, busy, and isolated for so long.
Phenomaman considers that information, and Robert. his eye-bags are still present, but he's smiling. "Will you promise me to continue this talk another time? It has been wonderfully enlightening. I have much to learn about you."
Robert can't help it - his eyes dart off from the compliment. "As long as you don't use the word rizz ever again."
"I shall not."
Robert stands up and offers a hand to the tall man. He also steps up and doesn't miss the cue that this is the end of the night. Beef yips contently, happy to watch them from his pillow. Both of them step towards the door before Phenomaman stops him, placing a hand on his face.
"Uh, what's up?"
Phen's eyes are particularly glowing, the tears having dried away. "Words are difficult, as this talk has presented me. So may I attempt to tell you that with Frank, that you look very beautiful tonight?"
Robert's eyes widen. His heart thumps in his chest. "Um... thanks."
A small kiss is placed on his forehead, and Robert's heart keeps on thumping then and there.
"Thank you again for tonight, Robert."
"Uhm... you too. I mean, yeah," he stutters, brain roiling in the implications. "Just don't tell anyone I'm Mecha Man, okay?"
Phen is now as stunned as he was. "You are Mecha Man?"
"Wait, I thought you knew?"
"I-I did not."
In the back of his mind, a cartoon bomb flies down into his head with a pitched-down Doppler whistle and blows up. God damnit. "Well... there goes that. Shit."
"Not to worry - I will keep this secret to my grave." His serious face very much implies that the promise would be kept, too. "My goodness... It seems like superhero work is not done with you yet... Phenomenal," he murmurs softly, suddenly seeing the hero in a new light, practically radiating mirth with the news.
Robert crosses an arm over his chest, face burning again.
"Woof!" says Beef, a perfect divide of the moment.
"Yeah… woof," Robert says, blinking. "I guess not," he mutters. "Good night, Phenomaman."
He can almost hear the wink in the man's deep voice. "Good night... Robert Robertson."