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Giyuu's eyes are locked on the slightly rickety wood panels under his feet, face tinting a pale pink in what Sanemi can only imagine is something akin to shame. His black hair sticks to his cheeks, wet from the rain that's been pouring down since the night before.
“Well?”
Giyuu's eyes flit up nervously as the man across from him suddenly speaks. “Well what?” he replies in a hushed tone, a part of him thinking Sanemi might throw him off of his front porch just for opening his mouth.
“Well get inside already! What’re you trying to do, flood my house?”
Giyuu hurriedly walks in and kicks off his shoes, eyes still locked on the floor.
“What the hell made you think it was a good idea to come here while it's pissing rain huh? If you get a cold and let your arm get infected you deserve to have the other one chopped off as well!” Giyuu almost smiles. There's a hint of softness in Sanemi's reprimanding he never noticed just weeks ago, he thinks he can make out some genuine concern under all the harsh lecturing. Maybe something in all the killing and hurting softened him after all.
Sanemi snaps to get his attention. “Hey, I was asking you a question asshole! What gave you the impression it was alright for you to show up here today?”
“I'm sorry if it was inconvenient for you Sanemi… I didn't know if you’d been eating properly so I thought I’d bring you some extra ohagi I had made.” Giyuus thumb rubs on the side of the plate while he speaks to ease his nerves.
“I wasn't giving you grief because it's inconvenient…Why are you even worried if I'm eating alright!?”
Giyuu's shoulders tense up to his ears, eyes falling back to the floor despite the others best efforts.
“It was a stupid idea, I’ll come back another time.” He turns to leave but Sanemi grabs the back of his patchworked haori before he can reach the door.
“In the rain? No way, you’re waiting it out now!”
Reluctantly Giyuu is dragged into the wind estate. He hadn’t visited Sanemi since that tense week leading up to Ubayashiki's confrontation with Muzan. Last time he was in this living room the floors had been freshly mopped, there weren’t discarded bandages and empty dishes left out on the tables. Giyuu moves them aside to place his tray of carefully wrapped ohagi on the table.
“Dont just stand there, you’re allowed to sit you know?”
Giyuu quickly falls to his knees on one of the several cushions surrounding the table. He imagined there used to be nights, back when all the Hashira were still there to train together, Sanemi would invite the others over for drinks around this table. Giyuu was very rarely invited to nights like those, but he missed the warmth they brought regardless. Now there was no Hashira to invite over and no reason to unwind after a long day.
Sanemi kneels beside him and unwraps a ball of the ohagi, secretly delighted to have chosen one coated in red bean paste. “You really didn't have to come here Giyuu. Do you really think I want your pity?”
“Im not pitying you! I had the day off and I wanted to make sure you were still eating.” Giyuus face tinges pink like it usually does when he's embarrassed. Sanemi scoffs at his response and eats half of his ohagi in one bite. The two sit in silence as they wait for Sanemi to finish chewing.
“You don't gotta worry about me alright? Especially not if it means getting soaked and freezing half to death out there.” Sanemi says through a mouth half full of food. Giyuu rarely hears him talk in any tone that doesn't convey anger. But then again, a lot about Sanemi has changed. Giyuu wasn’t allowed to sit so close before, back when the house was full and tidy.
He sits there fidgeting with the hem of his haori, his loose stitchwork between the two halves frayed with age. Under the haori wasn't the uniform he'd grown so accustomed to, but a cotton button down shirt tucked into hakama that had gone dark from the rain. He tried to wrack his brain for any kind of conversation starter but kept drawing blanks until he blurted out the first thing on his mind.
“Sanemi…how are you going to spend these last few years?
Sanemi pales. “What the hell kind of question is that?! If I'd known you were going to get so gloomy I would’ve locked you out in the rain.”
Giyuu cringes and his hands bunch the fabric of his hakama into tight balls. “It was a bad question, I just can't wrap my head around it all yet. I'm sorry I brought it up.” There's another awkward pause after he speaks and then Sanemi breaks it with a sigh.
“It’s a fine question, and if you really gotta know I don't have any idea what I’m doing either. I thought bout finding a woman, it wouldn't be that fair if I was gone in a few years though. Think I'm just going to train until I can't anymore.”
Giyuu nods, filling the silence with a piece of ohagi he stuffs in his mouth.
“Hey that's mine you’re eating! Jeez, I just opened up to you and now you’re avoiding speaking by eating all my food!”
Giyuu pauses for a moment in reflection. The corner of his mouth quirks up slightly, something like a smile. “I thought the same thing you know… about settling down. It just wouldn’t be fair.”
Sanemi laughs to himself and takes another piece of the ohagi.
“What’s so funny about that?!”
“Nothin, just don't know a woman alive who’d want to get hitched to you Tomioka.”
Giyuu’s face warms slightly from Sanemi's teasing. His eyes keep shifting between the wooden floor and the table.
He yelps when Sanemi smacks the back of his shoulder, nearly causing him to choke.
“Lighten up a bit, I'm only kidding. Didn’t think you were the type to get so worried about finding a woman.”
Sanemi lays back and pulls the cushion he was sitting on out from under him so he can rest his head.
“You know who got it really easy?”
“Who?”
“Tengen”
Giyuu sighs and nods his head in agreement. There isn't much he wouldn't give to have forty years ahead of him and a family who loved him, most importantly a family who was still alive. His heart aches a little, even as he tries to push it down.
“We knew what we were doing when we became Demon Slayers. We gave up our lives when we signed up, and we accomplished our goal.”
Sanemi tenses, a few months ago he might have hit Giyuu for lecturing him. His fists clench, resting at his sides instead.
“I know damn well what I gave my life for! All I’m saying is that it's too bad we need to waste away for the last four years of it.” Now Sanemi’s looking away too. His heart was pounding in his chest. He feels the same sort of cold sweat wash over his body he felt during his entrance exam. That cool, uncomfortable fear that injected adrenaline straight through his veins. He’d been so ready to die back in that castle, but thinking about it now was different. It didn’t feel fulfilling or honourable, it was inevitable, just another thing that would pass. Sanemi always assumed he’d either die to a demon, or retire and be taken by old age.
“Sanemi…do you sometimes wish you died back in the battle with Muzan?” Giyuu’s voice trembles with something like nerves.
“What the hell are you sayin?!”
He flinches. “Sometimes I think it would’ve been easier… instead of waiting around for it like this.”
Sanemi sits with the thought for a moment, then he has to sit up to stop himself from hyperventilating.
Nope, not going to do this while Giyuu's here, it wont happen.
“Don't say shitty things like that! You only have four years then you can go off and die with everyone else alright? Do you wanna get thrown back in the rain?!” Sanemi's eyes are wide. Giyuu thinks for a second he might see tears pricking at the corners, but he doesn’t feel like being kicked out into the rain so he keeps it to himself. He watches Sanemi tremble to keep himself together, his knuckles white from how hard he’s gripping the table.
“I'm sorry…I should’ve kept it to myself.
“Damn right you should’ve! Everyone gets thoughts like that you know? But only assholes like you go around tellin everyone!”
Giyuu goes back to fidgeting with the hem of his haori, accidentally pulling a thread loose this time. The other’s face is completely turned away now. Giyuu sees his jaw clench, then hears his breathing get shaky.
“Of course it would’ve been easier if we died fighting Muzan, but it had to end like this for everything to be worth it!” Sanemi's voice is shaky, his sleeve coming up to his face. Giyuu can see how tense he is, how hard he’s trying to conceal anything that could give away even the slightest hint of distress.
Giyuu feels glued in place. He never could talk to others, let alone comfort them. He wracks his brain for something to ease the tension in the room, thinking back to those days in his childhood he spent with Sabito. Before their entrance exams he’d spent much of his time grieving Tsutako and the boy had always been there for him.
Impulsively he places his hand over Sanemis, locking their fingers, just like how he was comforted as a child. The man next to him freezes, completely wordless. Giyuu almost recoils, expecting Sanemi to beat him up and shun him for even considering it would be remotely acceptable to try something so intimate. Instead both of the men are frozen in place, unsure of how to move forward.
“Giyuu…” They’re frozen in place for a few more agonizing seconds. Giyuu releases his hand and the other finally turns back, wiping his eyes, now shot red.
“Don’t chicken out now! You’re the one who started this dumbass!” He grabs Giyuu’s hand, tight now. It’s cool, softer than his own, but still calloused and roughened from years of battle.
“I’m… I’m sorry! I was just trying to make you feel better, I didn't want to make things weird!” Giyuu blurts out in response.
“It’s only weird cause you're makin it weird! Listen… you said you don't want to find a girl anyways, all we got now is each other…maybe Tengen and the Hinoe that survived as well but they have their own people.”
The pink on Giyuu’s cheeks goes red, he’s sure Sanemi can feel his pulse.
“So don’t go bringing me baked goods and actin like a chick if you don't want to be treated like one.”
He pushes Sanemi off in offense instead of shame now. The wind Hashira lands on his back, making a winded noise, playing up how hurt he is.
“I wasn't acting like a girl, you’re the one who started crying!” Giyuu isn't the only one who’s gone red now. Sanemi pulls him down with him, then tackles him, putting him in a headlock that isn’t really tight enough to do any real harm.
“I wasn't crying, you just say dumb stuff all the time, I was trying not to kick your ass!”
Giyuu gets a hand under Sanemi’s leg and manages to flip him off, sending the wind Hashira onto his back. He lets out an exaggerated winded noise, just to guilt Giyuu a little. Giyuu crawls over to him, looking down at the other man. “You’re an idiot. If I'm really stuck with you until one of us dies I’m doomed.”
Sanemi snickers and grabs the back of Giyuu’s collar, locking them both face to face. Giyuu starts to shy away again, something just adjacent to dread stirring deep in the pit of his stomach.
“Even if we’re retired this is a bad idea…it's not right.” He tries to look at anything but the face right in front of him.
“Do you think I care about what's right anymore? I gave up my whole life for what's right, I’m doing whatever I feel like now.” he pulls Giyuu in a little closer with no resistance. There's an awkward moment when neither of them are brave enough to make the final move. “This is silly, we both want-”
Sanemi’s cut off by the other sinking down, capturing his lips. There's a pause where neither knows what to do, but it's broken when Sanemi’s lips part. Giyuu’s slow to match the rhythm he sets at first, he makes an attempt to be bold and take the lead, but his inexperience is obvious. His nerves come out in the kiss.
Sanemi breaks it for a moment and laughs. “Giyuu, relax a little, I'm serious!” He pulls Giyuu's hips down so their bodies are flush together. The man above him lets out a little huff of air at the feeling and sinks against him.
“I haven't kissed someone before…you’ll have to forgive me.”
“That much is clear.” Sanemi teases before he pulls Giyuu back down. This time he lets the water Hashira set the pace, which quickly intensifies with their bodies so tight together.
Sanemi’s hand wanders his back, then gathers the cloth in a fist so he pulls the other closer to his body. He hums when he feels Giyuu's tongue flit against his lips, begging for entry. This time when they part Giyuu's tongue presses down inside, drawing out a deep sigh. Sanemi feels the others hand go to his hip. He wasn’t inexperienced by any means, but being under someone like this, let alone another man was something so new. The feeling of finally showing weakness, submitting to him, was a release in itself.
Desperation slips into the kiss when Giyuu moans low into Sanemi's mouth. He’s pictured how his first time might go for ages, for awhile he had accepted it might never happen. It's heady and surreal. Giyuu’s eyes screw shut, his eyebrows knit together tight, relishing finally feeling getting to feel what he'd always imagined.
His leg sneaks between Sanemis and parts them, and Sanemi lifts his knee so his thigh presses tight between the other man's legs. Giyuu's hips roll mindlessly at first, just trying to find a position that's comfortable, but the moment he finds some friction against Sanemi's thigh he feels a familiar jolt of heat that stirs deep in his stomach. His breath comes quickly out of his nose and tickles the other's face before he sinks his hips again, purely on instinct, and his cock fills with hot blood. Overwhelmed he breaks away to catch his breath.
“Fuck- Nemi!”
Giyuu quickly pulled back down into the kiss. The man beneath him is equally falling apart, letting something akin to a moan slip out of his mouth when their lips touch again. This time Giyuu cradles Sanemi's face against the floor so he can grind down harder, Sanemi's thighs giving a sudden twitch when Giyuu's leg slots just in the right place to rub against his aching length. He begins to roll his hips down now, as if pleading for any kind response. Fire builds in his gut at every hint of friction, every sound Sanemi accidentally lets slip through his lips. Giyuu’s pants tent between his legs, his own length untouched and weeping for attention.
He almost jumps when Sanemi begins to work his haori off.
“Sanemi! Are- Are you undressing me? You’re serious about this?”
Sanemi unbuttons the shirt of the man above him with a sense of care and affection Giyuus only sees him use for his sword.
“Well I'm not going to blue-ball you”
“This isn't about that! You’re really sure you want this…with me?”
Sanemi places a soft kiss on his throat that makes Giyuu to shudder.
“I'm sure. Like you said, we’re stuck together.”
Under Giyuu’s shirt are fresh scars where his stitches had recently been removed. Sanemi's thumb rubs the skin adjacent to them, leaving heat in its wake.
“Careful…those still hurt a little.”
He lightens his touch, instead opting to slink his hands down to Giyuu's hips while the other focuses on peppering kisses down his neck. Sanemi tilts his head back, relishing in the feeling. His haori begins to shrug down, leaving his chest and the bandages that wrap his stomach in full view.
Giyuu hooks a finger under the wind Hashira's pants and slowly works them down. He takes breaks from working off Sanemi’s clothes to focus on his body, his lips stilling on his neck to feel how the others pulse races under them. When he continues Sanemi lets his hips lift off the floor so his pants can come off. He strains against his fundoshi underwear, the fabric going translucent with wetness.
Giyuu lets out a hiss of air, when his own pants work down they’re hot and slick against each other.
“I…I don't really know where to go from here…I’ve never…”
Sanemi takes his hand and hums low when he guides it between them. “I’ve only done it with chicks, we’re both pretty inexperienced huh?”
He reaches for something under the clutter on his table and then pulls a small bottle out of a pouch. He slips it into Giyuu's hand. “It's clove oil.”
“Why are you just keeping this on your kitchen table?!”
Sanemi flashes him a toothy smile. “Didn’t think I’d have guests…I want you to use it on me.”
Giyuu can hear his pulse in his ears. He hesitates for a moment with the bottle in hand, considering Sanemi's words. He attempts to reign in his expression, not to show any sign of incredulousness.
“You don't want to, you know, be on top?”
The man below him laughs. “After that? Not really, and I like the idea of putting you to work.”
Giyuu’s sure his face had gone beet red at this point. He’d never in a million years thought of Sanemi as anything other than the violent, hyper masculine Hashira everyone had made him out to be. He still wasn't completely convinced Sanemi wouldn't beat him up, or worse, completely shun him after this.
He unties the other man's fundoshi, a slight amount of difficulty with one hand. His heavy breathing that he usually worked so hard to control betrays his arousal. Sanemi’s hardened cock pushes the fabric aside, weeping precome over itself and Giyuu has to shut his eyes for a moment to stop himself from rolling his hips on instinct again. He lays down against Sanemi's chest so they’re as close as possible, and his fingers, slicked in the clove oil, slowly find their way between his legs.
Giyuu's fingers trace slow methodical circles around the tight ring of muscle, causing Sanemi to take a quick intake of breath and wrap his fingers through the other dark locks of hair.
“Nemi…I don't want to hurt you. You’re sure this is alright?”
“Dammit, yes!” he answers between puffs of breath, eyes clenched tight.
When the muscles relaxes, Giyuu slips in his pointer finger up to the knuckle. He nearly keens at the feeling of heat clenched around him, imagining his length buried inside it. The man below him is nearly panting, trying his hardest to relax his spasming muscles. Giyuu gives him a moment before he curls his finger up in a come hither motion, drawing a low sigh from the other.
Once the muscles have relaxed and Sanemis no longer squirming his hips to accommodate him, Giyuu takes it as the go-ahead to insert another finger. This time when he curls his fingers it pulls out a low grunt from the Wind Hashira, and his cock twitches in interest against his stomach. Giyuu feels himself go dizzy just watching.
He works his fingers in and out, scissoring them to open up the walls fluttering around him until they suddenly reach up a little further than usual and a shudder wracks Sanemi's body.
“Giyuu-Fuck right there!”
Sanemi's hips lift to meet his fingers, pupils blown with pleasure. He feels perverse for witnessing the other man fall apart beneath him so vulnerably. At the same time it gives him a rush of pride. Giyuu purposefully bullies the spot until he’s unsure if Sanemi could even form a real sentence apart from the slurred curses and choked noises he accidentally lets slip every now and then.
A hand catches his wrist and he freezes in place.
“Giyuu…” He draws in a laboured breath. “...Enough”
Giyuu lets his fingers slide out, he thinks he might die if he goes another minute without being touched. “I need to be inside you…sanemi please let me -please” His words come out overly needy before he's pulled down into another kiss.
Giyuu feels himself slide between the other man's thighs, feels his heart beating against his chest. Sanemi's thighs open to accommodate him, one pointed out while the other rests on the floor. He’s quick, almost frantic to break the kiss and guide Giyuu between his legs, against his fluttering hole.
“Yeah…whatever, just don’t split me in half.” He feigns the slightest bit of uninterest to pretend like he doesn't want to start begging Giyuu at this point.
When he sinks his hips down, overwhelmed by the tightness enveloping him, Giyuu whines unabashedly. His mouth hangs open, taking intense care and time to bury himself to the hilt, stopping for a second so he won't immediately fall apart. Sanemi's head is thrown back again, pale neck exposed, and while Giyuu takes a moment to still his hips he leans down to plant an open mouthed kiss against his neck.
After a moment Giyuu gives his hips a testing roll, drawing back half way and then filling Sanemi once again so his hands are scrabbling at his back for purchase. As he lets himself find a rhythm, he watches how the others chest rises and falls with his breath, any of the hard trained control he’d learned so his breathing stayed consistent even in his sleep now disappearing. Giyuu tilts his head down and presses their foreheads against each other, breath and sweat mixing between their bodies. He flushes hard, not just from the intense arousal wracking his body, but in shame of whimpering and mewling noises he keeps letting slip. Though as much as he tries, he can seem to shut himself up. Sanemi laughs breathlessly to himself beneath him.
“Aren’t I- haah~ The one who should be sounding like that?”
Giyuu cringes at his words and gives his hips a hard buck, burying deep inside him in hopes the Sanemi will lose his train of thought. When the legs around him squeeze tight, shivering with tension, he knows it’s worked.
“Fuck! Just like that Giyuu!”
He’s not sure he can keep up the rhythm, the friction burning around him, making molten heat curl in his abdomen, but Giyuu would kill if it meant it would please Sanemi right now.
“Sanemi~ I can’t- I won't last much more!” He buries his face in the crook of his neck again as the rhythm of his hips becomes erratic, desperately chasing his own pleasure. He feels Sanemi’s fingers wrapped in his hair, squeezed tight into a fist.
“Yeah…me neither- Shit- I want to see you come!”
Sanemi's voice, deep and gravely with euphoria, is like an aphrodisiac for him. His hips stutter, but before he finishes he wraps his hand around Sanemi's cock, pumping it in time with his thrusting. At the unexpected motion Sanemi curses him and groans, his legs squirming at Giyuus sides.
At the added friction Giyuu feels the coil snap and he buries himself deep while he spills himself into the man beneath him. He thrusts desperately as he rides out the waves of his orgasm, his vision going white for a moment. He's so hopelessly lost in his own pleasure that it completely catches him off guard when warmth fills his hand, and a genuine, desperate moan slips past Sanemi's lips.
His vision is unfocused, breath-strained and heavy, but he finds Sanemi's lips once again and stays with him for a moment in a deep, affectionate kiss.
They lay together for a moment and catch their breaths, Giyuu still buried to the hilt. Once he softens and pulls out, he lays on the now warm floor, and pulls a cushion to rest under Sanemi's head. It takes a moment for the both of them to stop reeling.
“As much as you’re a dumbass, I don’t think I’ll mind spending my last four years doing this.”
Giyuu just got himself to stop flushing, when his cheeks light up pink again. “If I’m a dumbass what does that make you?”
“An even bigger one probably.” Sanemi wraps an arm over Giyuu's shoulder and pulls him tight to his body. Sanemi's fingers run through his dark hair, now loose and running over Giyuu's back and shoulders.
“I’m glad I’m stuck with you, really. I think I’d lose my mind if I was in this alone.” Giyuu admits.
Sanemi has to turn his face away again. Giyuu imagines him hiding his blush, or maybe a dumb smile.