Chapter Text
He'd given up becoming Mecha Man. Benched permanently after his last foray with Shroud. Mandy made sure of that because he ended up passed out for a few days after everything was said and done. Not to mention the amount of pain killers he's been on to get through the days.
His physical therapist has been working with him, but so far it doesn't seem he'll walk without support from his cane now. His back was too fucked.
The goal was to be able to lift 50 pounds. Mainly so he could pick up and carry Beef if need be.
Then, another villain got to him.
And in the moment, Robert could lift him, that superhuman ‘mom’ strength as Courtney called it afterwards.
Chase helped him back home, carrying Beef who was exhausted. Robert sighed and waved as he left, exhausted from the day's events.
~
That morning, Robert woke up to a small hand slapping his face.
That was very unusual.
He sat up quickly and the kid moved, looking up at him with big brown eyes. His hair was black with a white streak in the middle. The most noticeable was the perky dog ears.
“Beef?”
The kid nodded.
His dog turned human nodded.
Robert really didn’t want to deal with this first thing in the morning, but Beef’s stomach growled and he sighed.
“I guess you can have people food now instead of kibble.”
There was nothing in the apartment to eat, he already knew that. So he nudged Beef to get off the mattress. He had bought one after everything. Then he looked at his… kid and sighed.
“Let’s go get something.”
~
Beef happily was eating a croissant while Robert sipped on a hot coffee. Thankfully there was a small cafe near his place. As the kid munched, he sighed, texting Mandy. The situation was weird for sure, but at least he works at SDN which kind of deals with weird.
Afterwards, Robert made his way to the office. He had already gotten ready and got Beef ready as much as he could.
Walking into the office with a child clinging to him was weird for sure. It was still early, but a few people were here and there. Once he got to his desk, he flopped into his chair and Beef clambered up to sit in his lap.
“Can you talk, hm?” Robert decided to see and Beef just looked up at him and blinked, “Of course not. You haven’t mastered English, just dog.”
As he sat there, he heard footsteps approaching.
“Oh, is this Beef?”
It was Mandy and she approached and crouched down to him.
“We should take him to the Medical for testing.”
Robert shifted and frowned, not realizing the protective grip he sheltered Beef with until she sighed.
“It’ll just be blood tests and a routine physical.” Mandy explained, “Just need to make sure he’s alright.”
He slowly nodded, “Right, that’s smart. We… we should do that.”
“I get it. Beef’s like your kid. I would be worried too. Does he know what the v-e-t is?”
Thankfully she spelled it out because that was one of the words Beef does know. One of the words Beef hates.
Robert nodded, “Yeah he does. So best to just say doctor’s. He doesn’t know that I think.”
Mandy wasn’t as strong without her amulet and neither was Robert so as Beef clung to his neck neither of them could carry him.
“He’s even clingier as a human.” She laughed, “Maybe we should wait for Chase to get in?”
Beef perked up at Chase’s name and Robert agreed.
~
Mandy and Robert were discussing what to call Beef because obviously, no one would, hopefully, name their actual child that.
“If anyone asks, I think his name should be like Benjamin or Bennett.” She hummed.
“If who asks about who?” A grumpy voice interrupted.
It was Chase, who almost instantly got barrelled over by Beef. If not for the amulet he probably would have.
“Who’s the kid?”
Robert sighed, “Chase, meet Beef.”
“Real funny, kid.” He chuckled, “He does look like your dog. Has the ears too.”
Mandy and Robert looked at each other and Chase sighed.
“You two aren’t joking are you?”
After a short explanation that was really a lot of ‘I don’t knows’, Chase helped carry Beef down to Medical.
~
A few tests later, it was determined that Beef was fine. A healthy boy, about 5 years old. The nurse explained that they’ll send the blood tests out to check on the magic properties as they didn’t have the expertise here for it. It was mostly going to determine if Beef was going to stay human or not.
‘Give it a week.’ they had said, ‘If he doesn’t change back then we’ll forge the birth certificate.’
Then they were shooed away as the nurses went to tend to an injured hero. Which led into Mandy declaring that he had a day off to get at least some kid clothes for Beef.
Which led here, where he bumped into the z-team as he was leaving.
“Who’s fucking kid is that?” Colm asked, coming closer to examine the kid.
Chad laughed, “Did you knock someone up or something, Bob Bob?”
Beef clung to his leg, nervous about the crowd and Robert sighed, “Guys please clear out a bit, you’re scaring him.”
Bruno and Janelle were the only ones who listened.
“This is Beef.”
They all went quiet.
“Beef’s a dog, Roberto, nice try.” Victor chuckled.
“We’re not sure how yet, but Beef for now is a kid.” He sighed, “Which means I’m getting the day off to get him clothes. So be nice to Blonde Blazer”
Alice spoke up, “There’s no way you have any fashion sense to dress that kid right.”
“He’s a dog turned human, I’m pretty sure his standards are low.”
“Just like yours.” She scoffed.
“Listen, you guys need to go do your jobs. I can handle getting him clothes.”
They all grumbled, but slowly left, except for Chad and Courtney.
“What do you two want?”
Courtney shrugged, “Just wanted to see the little guy up close without freaking him out.”
Beef smiled as she crouched down to his level.
“Does he talk?”
“Unfortunately not.”
She nodded and ruffled his hair before leaving.
“Do you even know how to take care of a kid?” Chad crossed his arms.
Robert looked down at Beef, “I’ve kept him alive as a dog this long, how hard can it be?”
Looking back, he’ll probably realize he was definitely in over his head, but, how hard could it be, really? The worst years of having a kid was behind him. Now all he has to do is… cloth, bath, and feed him. God, he needs to pick up sheets and blankets for his mattress now at least for Beef’s comfort.
He’s fucked. Absolutely fucked.
~
Robert was officially tired with shopping. Too many people came up to him asking if he needed help. He probably did, but the point stands. He grabbed a few clothes for Beef to try on. As he was waiting someone walked up and started talking about her kids. Which he did not exactly care about.
He was pretty sure her kids were the ones running around screaming anyway.
After finding out what size his kid was, he picked up a few shirts and pants. Beef stuck to him like glue. Probably a little freaked by the change after all.
Occasionally, he showed interest in certain shirts which Robert picked up almost instantly for him. Some things never change. Afterwards, he swung by and picked up sheets. There was a blanket with corgis on it too and that went into the cart as well.
Beef wandered a little away, looking at plushies. As he caught up to him, he sighed fondly. In his hands was a Mecha Man plush. It was part of a series of hero plushies. In fact, nearby were Blonde Blazer and Phenomaman plushies.
“Alright, Beef, that’s all yours.” He smiled, ruffling his hair.
~
Robert found himself for once putting away groceries and looking around his apartment as Beef ran. He found himself smiling as he sat down on the floor with all the pants he had bought.
While hybrids like Victor were fairly common here and there, there were not a lot of mainstream lines of clothing to support extra appendages. So here he was with scissors.
First was his pajama pants as it was getting late already. Who knew shopping could take so long? As he finished, he stood, his back cracking.
“Time to get into pajamas.”
Beef simply looked at him confused.
“Pajamas are like comfy clothes…” He thought of how to explain it, “Like a blanket directly on your body.”
Whether or not he understood, Beef let him put him in the pajamas. His tail wagged as he looked up at Robert and showed off his clothes. It was just a set of green pajamas, but Robert felt his heart melt.