Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

Jason is like a Disney princess who attracts animals to him.

At first, it was just a cat, and then a dog, and then all kinds of animals.

After a few months of denial, he just accepts it; his house is filled with all kinds of animals, and his bed only has enough space to lie down in one place despite it being a king-sized bed.

Because of this, Damian loves spending time at Jason's place since he gets to spend time with a shit ton of animals while all the other bats just laugh at Jason Disney princess Todd when they see him, and a bird just lands on top of his head and just goes to sleep there.

Chapter Text

Jason is hit with a spell that rids him of emotions. At first, he didn't seem any different, but as time passed, it was obvious something had changed.

He no longer tried to fit into the family, desperate for approval from Bruce. He went back to his permanent way of getting rid of scum. He did still look after Crime Alley, he still looked after the sex workers and the homeless children.

Even though Jason himself knows that something is different, he doesn't care. He looks back on his memories, the way he went non-lethal just to fit in with his so-called 'family', and he understands theoretically why, but he no longer feels the same way. He feels neither positive nor negative emotions towards them. They aren't worth it. He just needs to focus on helping Crime Alley get better and getting rid of the rogues that plague Gotham.

And Batfam is just confused, as is Jason, who made a sudden 180 and tried to talk to him about it. Jason, not wanting to be bothered, just shot at places that wouldn't hurt them too badly, but still a warning to go away.

Bruce tries to capture Jason but fails. The only reason he had managed before was that Jason was full of emotion and had held back a bit, hoping for his father to help him. This Jason doesn't have emotions to hold back, so he goes all out.

As Jason steps his foot on top of Bruce, helmet-free, he smiles. No, a real one, but as if he were an actor playing a role. The smile is so unsettling that you wish he would stop.

After Bruce was left alone, he went back to the Batcave and kind of told the others what happened. They all wonder what happened to Jason, why and how he changed so much?

Chapter Text

Jason confronts the Joker.

Joker tries to get to him, but Jason just smirks and says, “You know... you want me to lose it. Make your death something dramatic. Attention worthy. But...” he chuckles, “you’re not worth that. All you’re going to get is a bullet with no one to watch. No audience, and definitely no Batman to watch to great Joker die.”

Joker’s face frowns at that, but before he could say anything, Jason continues, “No one knows we’re here. And I mean no one. I made sure of it. So..." He pauses. "Buh-bye~” he says with a smile that’s just oh so innocent, before a loud bang echoes out in the basement the two were in.

Joker’s body falls to the ground like dead meat, and just to make sure the dreadful clown is truly dead and won’t come back, he shoots the head again and then the heart.

There was no way of coming back to life from this.

But since Jason knew he could be resurrected as he had, he poured gasoline over the dead body and up the stairs, into the house, until he was outside the house.

As he finished pouring the gasoline, he placed the bottle down and brought a matchbox out of his pocket. Taking one match out, he lights it and drops it into the long line of gasoline, watching the house and Joker’s body up in flames.

What a joyous occasion. Jason turns around and hums as he walks off to celebrate with his outlaw team after finally ridding himself of his monster.

Chapter Text

Dick Grayson is transformed into a cat by a magic user during his patrol and is found by Red Hood.

Red Hood just takes such good care of cat dick that dick just can’t believe this is the guy who stuffed 8 heads in a duffle bag, but Jason had yet to take off his helmet the whole night until he decides it's time to shower.

When he gets out and is in his PJs, dick is just shocked because it’s his Little Wing, his little brother, who is supposed to be dead but somehow isn’t.

The little brother who is now built like a tank, instead of the small boy he once was, is in his memories. His eyes are unnaturally green with a hint of blue underneath, instead of his usual blue. A streak of white instead of fully black, scars litter his body, showing the hardships he faced. He feels devastated at not being able to help Jason, even when Dick knew that he didn't even know Jason was alive.

Dick sticks next to Jason the whole time he's in the safehouse; he even attempts to follow him when he leaves, not wanting to separate. He isn’t ready to realise this isn’t real. That he’s hallucinating again. But as days go by, the realisation that Jason is in fact alive is finally setting in.

He’s definitely Jason, his Little Wing, his brother. He’s still the book lover he was, always reading a book after his crime lord business and all that jazz. He’s also still a clean freak; he was such a clean freak when he was staying in the manor. A smile makes its way on his face as he remembers those fond memories from before Jason died.

Jason also cooks! Somehow, Jason managed to find a recipe that allows cats to eat it as well, and holy shit, it was absolutely delicious! He meows for seconds; it's just that good, no one would be able to resist either.

Now then... When will he turn back into a human, and what’ll happen then? Does he need to get someone to reverse the spell, or is waiting good enough?
More importantly... How will he get Jason to come back to the manor?

What’s close to a sigh comes out of his cat's mouth as he lies on Jason's lap. Purring as Little Wing’s hand pets him.

Chapter Text

Bruce finds out that Jason does missions under Talia and tells Jason that she’s using him.

Jason just shrugs; he already knew that and is freely choosing to go along with it.

He gets praise and approval from it, so why wouldn’t he?

Bruce never did that. Him and his ridiculous morals. What, with his no kill rule, despite putting people in comas or indirectly killing people.

All Bruce does is reprimand and scold him for somehow screwing something up. Always at fault somehow. Never treated the same as other family members.

What a hypocrite.

Plus, a woman being badass? Of course, he’d support it! What is he? Sexist?

Definitely not.

So seeing a badass that has kind of adopted him as a son, of course, he’d do what she wants!

Plus, he gets to spite Bruce is doing so. Win-win

Chapter Text

Jason Todd, who's been told over and over again about how much Bruce Wayne had grieved him. But when Jason visited the manor, all he saw was a home that erased his existence.

There were no photos of him on the walls despite everyone else being there. There was no evidence of the person 'Jason Todd' having ever lived here, except for the locked door with a J on it.

Even down in the cave, all there was was the dreadful memorial case.

[IN MEMORY OF JASON TODD -ROBIN- A GOOD SOLDIER]

When he first saw it, he froze as something grew in his stomach. He felt sick seeing it.

He was reduced to a soldier. Not a son. No. A fucking soldier who was apparently 'good' despite his reputation as Robin being continuously tarnished and trampled on. Even to this day, it was trampled on, reduced to nothing but a cautionary tale.

He couldn't understand. How could Jason accept Bruce's grief if it stripped the essence of what makes Jason 'Jason Todd'? How could he accept it when he was reduced to nothing more than a soldier from the man who was supposed to be his 'father'?

How could all the others tell him that he was being too harsh on Bruce when Bruce had done this to him? Had made him nothing but a warning for little birdies about what not to be. 'Don't do this or you'll die like Robin II' or 'follow orders, otherwise you'll get yourself killed like Jason's and so on.

How could they trample on his name like that? Every other Robin disobeyed orders, but of course, it's only Jason whose named as the disobeyer because he died. What defence can a dead kid do right?

At this realisation, Jason quickly picks up anything swingable and throws it at the memorial case before picking it back up and swinging it at the glass. Shards falling, some scratching him, but he doesn't notice. His mind was moving on autopilot, overwhelmed with intense emotions, too much for him to bear.

He pants as he finishes, rushing out to where his motorcycle was parked before hopping on and driving away.

It was a mistake. He never should've trusted them. Should've never trusted Nightwing's words about how much Bruce grieved him. Never should've trusted Tim's words on how he's Bruce's son.

Because he's not. He's Batman's Robin. A good soldier. Not Jason Todd. Not Bruce Wayne's son.

He doesn't know where he's driving, but all he knows is that he wants out. Out of the manor. Out of Gotham. Away from the bats. He never should've trusted them.

Chapter Text

Jason is in the Batcave during a debrief, much to his displeasure. Suddenly, a portal appears right under Jason, and he falls through it. Closing as soon as his head passes it.

When he hits his ass on the ground, he takes in the image of the Batcave. But not the same as his world's one. There are similarities, but there are also differences. Some are placed in different spots, new items are added, and some things are gone.

As he continues to look around, he sees Batman with his cowl down, looking at him, surprised.

"Jason?" At this, Jason just nods, not knowing what to do under Bruce's staring eyes.

After a while of staring, Bruce stands up from his seat and walks over, calling him to come sit down to help him go back to wherever he came from, a small smile itching his face as he takes in Jason's appearance.

Jason is... Perplexed.

It feels odd. As if he's gone back in time to when Bruce was truly his father. The man who would skip patrol to watch a movie with his sick son.

He didn't know he missed that feeling. Of receiving the look of love and appreciation.

So it was a big surprise to find out that Bruce had never done anything bad to this world's Jason when he came back. He had simply communicated with Jason instead of fighting him. He had listened to Jason during his cry for help.

He didn't kill the Joker, but it was as close to death as Bruce was willing to go. He had sent Joker to the Phantom Zone.

After doing that, this world's Jason had apparently accepted that as enough and had managed to calm his anger, slowly returning to the manor, but not after a bit of struggle and hesitancy.

Jason could only internally laugh. He just had to be the unlucky one, huh? His father refused his cry for help, slitting his throat instead. Beating him to a pulp for shooting Penguin at point-blank range. Taken to the place of death to help his 'son' come back from the dead by reliving his death. Being implanted with a failsafe that can't even let him feel adrenaline without dear coursing through his veins...

What a joke.

This world's Bruce must have noticed something because he asked Jason what was wrong.

"Nothing... You're just so different from my Bruce, in a good way."

Bruce just raises his eyebrows, as if asking for more to satisfy his curiosity, but not pushing it if Jason doesn't want to elaborate.

Jason was grateful. It felt weird, but he had this gut instinct telling him that it was safe to tell this man about what Bruce had done. And so he did.

This Bruce was horrified, boiling with anger at his alternate self. He couldn't believe what that man had done to Jason. He was a failure of a parent and mentor.

It was unacceptable.

Bruce swore right then and there that he would do his best to help Jason in any way possible. To rid him of his failsafe. Did the other Bruce not think about the consequences? How is adrenaline an everyday occurrence? Jason would be plunged into fear daily, if not all the time. It's a miracle he isn't right now, honestly.

Feeling devastated at what Jason underwent, he urged the young man into his arms, giving him a hug while stroking his hair gently.

Jason just collapses into this Bruce's arms, tears forming and threatening to escape. He missed his dad's arms. He missed his hugs. The way dad's hand would stroke his hair, as if he were something special.

After a few minutes, Jason falls asleep. Bruce just looked down at the young man, and a sad smile made its way onto his face. If the other Bruce didn't appreciate Jason, maybe he didn't need to find a way to send him back. He's sure his Jaylad would be willing to help the Jason in his arms. Dick would be ecstatic to have another Jason as well. All of them are willing to protect him from anyone who might take him away.

No one was going to take his precious son away.

As he continues stroking Jason's hair, thoughts of how this Jason would interact with his kids, the sad smile turned into a small, joyful one. A hum makes his way out as he continues to caress Jason's hair as he carries him to his room, so that he can sleep in a more comfortable position.

He will rid his son of his failsafe and help Jason feel appreciated and loved if it's the last thing he'll do.

Chapter Text

Batman and Red Hood are fighting again after Jason goes too 'far', so Batman, upholding justice, beats the living daylights out of him.

He then threw one of those batarangs that blow up. This resulted in Red Hood's helmet being broken.

Little did Batman know that Jason was wearing one of his helmets that had a bomb in it.

So when the batarangs blew up and broke the helmet, it resulted in Jason's head being blown up with the helmet.

Batman stands frozen, seeing Red Hood blow up, no head in sight, as his bloodied body collapses onto the ground. The walls and floor around Red Hood are splattered with blood and brain matter.

Batman didn't mean to do that.

He didn't know Red Hood had a bomb in his helmet.

It's not his fault.

It's...

It's not.

It's Red Hood's fault for wearing a helmet with a bomb in it. He should've known better than to wear it.

Somehow, Batman had stumbled his way back to the Batmobile, riding back to the Batcave.

Nothing happened.

No one died tonight.

He didn't kill anyone.

He...

He didn't kill his...

His son...

Red Hood isn't his son.

He was a criminal.

All he did was uphold justice.

...

He has to make sure no one finds out.

And thus, he scrubs footage of his 'interaction' with Red Hood off the cowl footage from the computer.

No one knows where Jason went. They all wonder why he doesn't respond to their message. Even when they asked the outlaws, they found nothing. He just disappeared. Everyone is worried, scared that something happened, but they can't find anything.

Chapter Text

A spell that turns the person either into a demon or an angel, depending on their soul. So when Jason gets hit, everyone expects him to turn into a demon.

Instead, Jason turns into an angel, all shiny halo and angel's wings, all that jazz.

Everyone is shocked, more so the bats who joined after Jason's death. They thought he'd be a demon without a doubt because of what others, especially Bruce and Alfred, said about him. And the way Tim would sometimes speak about him?

He was a reckless and violent person. How they shouldn't/wouldn't be like Jason.

It would only make sense for Jason to be a demon.

But the fact that he's an angel?

There had to be something wrong.

Maybe the spell was wrong. Maybe it didn't depend on the person's soul? Like a coin toss?

But Zatanna had confirmed it was based on the person's soul...

But the implications of that would mean...

It meant that either Bruce, Alfred, or Tim lied, defaming an innocent boy. Or, God was on his side and didn't think his actions were worthy of hell.

Jason just looks uncomfortable, watching the others shocked, trying to understand that the 'big bad' Red Hood was more of an angel than a demon.

Like, he gets it, his reputation is in the gutters, his achievements as Robin disappeared into smoke when people started blaming him for his own death, with no one to defend him.

But the fact that everyone was surprised? It made him hurt in a way he didn't think possible.

He wants to run.

Run away from their scrutiny. Run away from this awkwardness. Run away with the fact that no one thought he was a good person deep inside. That, despite having twisted morals, his goal of being a vigilante is to help people.

And somehow in his mind, information on how to fly is just there.

Having had enough, he takes off, looking back once to see everyone's shocked faces that he can fly with his angel wings.

He flies off into the distance.

-

(if he goes to Nanda Parbat)

He arrives at Nanda Parbat.

Somehow, Talia had sensed he was coming as she welcomed him back. Taking in Jason's wings and halo, it's only a second before she smiles in sudden understanding.

She figures out that Jason had somehow turned into an angel and that all the bats were shocked. What idiots.

Jason's heart is made of gold. How could he ever be a demon?

"Come Habibi, shall we go drink some tea?"

Jason just nods, following Talia, who had started walking inside, grateful for her understanding as tension slowly eases away the further in he is.

The two go into a room, and Talia sits down.

Without hesitation, Jason occupied the space next to her and leaned down so that he was now lying on her thighs, facing towards her stomach, and he placed his arms around her waist.

Not questioning Jason's actions, just hums, caressing his head and gentle strokes as an assassin comes in to place tea on the table before leaving.

-

(if he goes to Outlaw's island)

Jason lands in the sand and looks around, and spots Roy tinkering away, making a new weapon that most likely could end the world.

He steps closer and calls out in a small voice, "Roy..."

Roy jumps, not expecting to hear Jason's voice, or anyone's really, but when he turns around, he sees the new addition to Jason.

He's shocked for a second, but then looks at Jason's body language, the way his face is downcast and awkward, his shoulders full of tension. His angelic wings tick in, as if to make himself smaller.

This alarms Roy, ideas of what happens floating in his head. But first things first, he needs to comfort his Jaybird.

He gets up and rushes to Jay, not crushing him in a hug yet, but placing a hand on his arm, asking what's wrong. Showing Jay that if he wants space, he'll give it to him, and if he wants a hug, he'll also give it to him.

Jason just leans forward, resting his head on Roy's shoulder.

Roy takes the hint and shifts so that he's hugging Jason, stroking his head in soft movements, telling Jason that he's okay and that he can call the others if he wants. Jason just nods, shifting so his head is further in Roy's neck.

Roy just chuckles, asking if Jay is a koala with his clingy he's being. Jason just snorts at him, saying he wishes.

After a few minutes, Roy suggests going inside to a very comfortable bed instead of just standing outside.

Not responding, Jason hurries the two inside and flops onto the nearest bed while Roy messages the others to come quickly.

Soon, the Kori, Artemis, and Bizarro arrive.

They see Jason cuddling with Roy, less tense than when he first came back, but still looking downcast.

It breaks their hearts to see Jason like that, and so they hurriedly approach the bed and climb onto it, making sure to surround Jason enough so he knows that they're there for him while not overcrowding him.

Except Bizarro.

Bizarro goes straight to Jason and cuddles the other free side, asking, "What's wrong red him?"

Jason just responds with 'family stuff', to which the gears in their heads turn, now understanding his reaction, putting together what happened based on the fact that Jason now has an angel's wings and halo.

Artemis remembers the time Jason mentioned he's never been to Hell, a common misconception one might have. But the fact that his own family misunderstood him? She felt anger. How could they do this to Jason? It may not be as bad as she thinks it is, but the fact that Jason is like this says enough.

Kori, hearing Jason say the cause of his sadness is because of his family, makes her livid. She's learnt of how the bats reacted to Jason's return, something she still gets angry at today, but they're still like that? All that's different is that Jason had wings and a halo; Jason is still Jason, and nothing changes that. Oh well, if they want to make Jason sad, it's only right that people who actually care about Jason make sure he's alright. She just hopes their cuddle session is improving his mood and making him feel better.

After a whole day of comforting Jay, he no longer looks as sullen, a small smile playing on his lips. The others just sigh in relief, not yet getting up so they could savour this moment. It wasn't often they saw Jason's genuine smile like they are now.

Chapter Text

Jason Todd, who died as a teenager.

Jason Todd, who came back from the dead, was only to be catatonic for two years.

Jason Todd, who's suddenly an adult and is expected by everyone to act like one.

But how does one act like an adult if they've never learnt how?

How can he when he died and missed two years of his life that are crucial for transitioning into adulthood?

How can everyone blame and scorn him for his actions when no one bothered to help him, a traumatised teenager? How can they say he should know better when no one was there to guide him after literally coming back from the dead?

How can everyone be like that, not understanding his development was stunted the moment he died and lost two years of his life? Forever.

How could they ever possibly understand what it's like to be a teenager one second, to an adult the next?

What hypocrites.

They're 'heroes', but they never were for him. They never bothered to lend a hand to a boy who so obviously has trauma, his actions screaming it.

And yet, they turn a blind eye, expecting him to be the bigger man.

An adult.

But he's never learnt how to be an adult the way others do, and it's hurting him.

Why can't anyone understand and help him?

Even just one person would be enough for him.

To know that he wasn't a mistake, that he shouldn't have stayed dead.

Chapter Text

Jason Todd was always implied to have caused his own death. For being too stubborn, angry, violent, and reckless. For not following orders.

It was never the fact that he grew up in an environment where crime was the norm. Where even the police hesitated to enter, with how dangerous it was.

It was never the fact that he had to resort to crime in order to live. To survive.

It was never the fact that, despite living in Crime Alley, the only crime he committed was stealing car wheels. Not things like selling drugs or running errands for the rogues.

It was never the fact that he saw criminals get off scot-free despite the irreversible harm the victims faced.

It was never the fact that crime was a daily occurrence; as if stuck in a mixtape, replaying a sentence over and over again. Beat up a criminal, hand them to the GCPD, and they escape and commit more crimes. Rinse and repeat.

It was never the fact that he was a boy the loved learning. A boy so passionate that he'd stay up just to study more. A boy; despite being homeless for a few years and thereby not being able to learn anything during that time, managed to get As when he started learning again.

It was never the fact that he felt empathy for victims of crime. Becoming Robin to help those in need, those that justice fails to protect in comparison to all the other Robins (revenge, Batman's need of a Robin, and birth right). He felt angry that victims only received injustice, just because they're from the lower class. Not worth giving justice.

It was never the fact that he was just a young boy searching for a mother who might give him love. Especially after the man he thought was his father told him that he 'didn't need a teenage rebellion' and that he wasn't his son.

It was never the fact that he thought his mother was in danger so he disobeyed Batman and told her he was Robin so that she'd believe he could help, only for her to betray him by giving him to the Joker.

It was never the fact that he died a hero despite being betrayed by his mother; he still tried to protect her from the bomb with his battered body.

It was never the fact that all the other Robins had disobeyed Batman at least once before.

It never was his fault for dying. He didn't know the Joker was still there. He didn't know his mother was a backstabber. He didn't know he'd be locked in with a bomb ticking down.

It was never the fact that if the justice system actually worked, there would be no need for vigilantes. No need for Batman. No need for Robin.

It was never the fact that if Joker had been killed or imprisoned in an inescapable place long ago like he deserved, he wouldn't have died.

And yet...

Bruce. Batman. He shifted the blame from Joker, the thing that killed him, the cause of his death, onto Jason.

It's his fault for being in Ethiopia. As if Bruce never told Jason that he wasn't his son and benching him from Robin; making Jason believe he was finally going to get kicked out. Running to Ethiopia at a chance that his mother would love and accept him.

It's his fault for betraying orders, going after Joker. As if he didn't think his mother was in danger, the one last chance that someone in this God forsaken world loved him. As if he knew the Joker was there and decided to 'confront' him to prove his worth.

It's his fault for beating up criminals harshly. As if they didn't deserve it. As if the criminal justice system would actually work for once. As if they'd get the retribution they deserve. As if the victims get the justice they deserve. As if the prisons weren't revolving doors.

Yes. Of course Jason Todd caused his own death, no one else but him.

The other Robins that have also died before? It's not their fault. There was something else that played a part in causing their death. It was not their fault and never will be.

Chapter Text

Jason, looking over Bat Cave footage and finds a clip where Bruce tells Damian that his memorial case wasn't to honour him. It was a reminder, never again.

He just scoffs at that. Of course, it would be like that.

Who would actually mourn him? He should've known better. Should've learnt his lesson the first time his parents failed him.

His dad, Willis, gone to prison, never to come back.

His mum, Catherine -because she was the one who raised him- chose drugs over him.

His biological mum, Sheila, betrayed him and gave him to the clown.

And obviously Bruce, the man who had adopted him. But in reality, Jason was just a charity case; a replacement for the golden boy who decided to fly away from the nest.

He should've known better than to expect anyone to love him. It's not like Bruce had put any effort into their broken relationship anyway.

It was always Jason who had to compromise.

He had to break his morals, putting up with the knowledge that even if he's stopping crime, it won't be permanent. That there will always be new victims that could've been avoided if only he hadn't desperately wished to fit in with a family that had outlasted him, the day Bruce had told him he didn't need a teenage rebellion.

It's not like after he died that his achievements disappeared like smoke, that his personality was warped beyond recognition, or anything like that.

What does he do with this new realisation?

Chapter Text

Ever since Jason reintegrated into the Bat Family, he has been seen carrying a broken dagger.

Without fail, whenever someone sees him, they will see the dagger. When one of them suggested that he take it off since there's no point in carrying a broken dagger, he gets defensive. He snarks at them to mind their own goddamn business as he walks away.

One time during patrol, when Jason and Dick were working together, Jason just froze, hands patting down his body, trying to search for something that wasn't there.

Dick notes that the dagger isn't on Jason.

Jason starts acting like he's in a frenzy, whipping his head left and right, trying to locate where it had gone.

In the distance, he managed to spot a thug bending down to pick up his dagger, inspecting it before throwing it away like it's garbage.

But it isn't. It's Jason's treasure. Proof that someone loves him and would do anything for him.

Not thinking, body moving on autopilot, Jason rushes to where the thugs are, much to Dick's dismay.

He beats them all up with efficiency, being dead silent in his beat-up, not cracking a single joke like he usually would.

When the last one goes down, he scurries to where the thugs threw the dagger and picks it up with such gentleness, as if it were a fragile item that could break with a hint of strength. He then pockets it, back to its usual place, slowly calming down now that he's been reunited.

Dick is just baffled by what he just saw. The only thing he can say is that he's proud that his Little Wing didn't use any excessive force or maim anyone. But he seriously needs to know why the dagger is so important to Jason, so much that he's obviously shaken up when separated from it.

After days of pestering Jason, Dick finally got his answer.

The dagger was Damian's, back in the league. Damian had used it to protect Jason during one of their missions together. The reason why Jason is so protective of the dagger is that it showed just how far Damian would go for Jason, using his dagger to protect him even when it broke.

Dick looks back at the times he's seen Jason and Damian interact. Sometimes like enemies, sometimes siblings. By the end of the day, you could often spot the two in the library, leaning on each other as they read a book.

It all makes sense now, and that just fills Dick's heart with tenderness. It's nice to know that even when Jason wasn't with them, there was someone to protect him, and vice versa for Damain.

Chapter Text

Scarecrow escaped Arkham and is making his new toxin concoction. Jason arrives before the other bats and tries to capture Scarecrow.

Unfortunately, one of the thugs Scarecrow hired managed to inject Jason with a liquid version of the fear gas.

It works instantly. Jason stumbles, clutching his helmet as he tries to steady his swaying body, telling himself that anything he sees isn't real.

And just then the bats arrive. But not to help take down Scarecrow.

No. They walk up to Jason, displaying a range of expressions on their faces, from a smile to a scowl and a look of disappointment.

Nightwing starts talking, "You know, I don't get why you're part of the team if you can't do anything right? I mean, you even failed to capture Scarecrow!"

"He's right, you were and always will be the worst Robin. So incompetent, unable to do anything right," Robin exclaims.

"Realistically, it's better if you were gone. You're only a burden, not of any help to us," Red Robin sighs out.

"I regret taking you in and making you Robin", Batman snarls.

Jason just collapses onto the ground, shaking his head left and right. As if the notion will make whatever is happening stop.

He keeps trying to tell himself that it's not real, that it's the toxin. But something deep inside, a small voice says otherwise.

That this is what they truly think of him, and were just waiting for this moment to reveal their thoughts.

-

The bats arrive at the scene, empty except for Red Hood, who's on the floor, cradling himself, shaking his head, mumbling something.

They try to talk to him, but he doesn't respond.

The closer they get, the clearer the mumbling is,

"I'm sorry...", "I'll do better", "Please don't abandon me", and so on.

The bats are shocked, they would've thought that Jason's fear would be the moment of his death, not... This...

Dick tries to go up and soothingly touch his arm, but Jason just jerks up and throws a punch before saying "I'm sorry" over and over again.

The others try to call him down as well, but it doesn't work. Jason is too worked up, unresponsive to outside cues, and attacks anyone who gets too close.

They need to find a way to administer the antidote, but they don't know how.

The bats look at each other, eyes communicating a plan, and then they nod as they get into position.

Nightwing and Red Robin wrap around his arms so that he can't swing them around. Robin wraps his body around the legs.

As the three try to hold Jason still, he is thrashing around, hitting Nightwing and Red Robin in the face and body.

Luckily, Batman managed to inject the antidote into the side of Jason's neck that is uncovered.

At this, Jason slumps down, as if the strings to a puppet were cut.

Nightwing takes Jason's helmet off, grateful that Jason always has a domino mask on. But looking at his face, it's clear that Jason had been crying, and not just a tear or two, but a stream of tears.

They don't know what they're going to do when Jason wakes up, but for now, they get him back to the cave so he can get medical care.

Chapter Text

Jason, who has Lazarus Pit madness but calms down when he sees Damian, and is even more effective when holding him.

It first started when Jason was catatonic. Damian would spend his time looking after Jason. Sometimes, when Jason was sitting, Damian would sit on top, reading a book to him. All Jason did was stroke Damian's hair, as if he were a fragile thing.

They got so close that as soon as Jason spotted Damian, he would hover towards the little boy until he was hugging him.

At first, Damian was annoyed and tried to resist saying that it's inappropriate for the demon heir to be treated like this. But then, after countless attempts, Damian slowly stopped resisting and even leaned into the hugs, only mumbling a complaint.

After Jason was dunked into the neon green unholy water, he became more active, more talkative.

But despite that, his habits from when he was catatonic were still there. Whenever he spotted Damian, as if his body was on autopilot, he'd walk towards Damian and pick him up into a hug when he got close enough.

Jason didn't understand what was going on, but he liked it. It felt comforting, therapeutic in a way.

And then, for the first time since coming out of the mountain dew, he was seperated from Damian and had his first session with the Pit madness, green taking over all his senses.

He went full on crazy, killing everyone in sight. All the assassins in the LOA who were notified of what happened tried to stop him, even Talia came at one point. But nothing he did seemed to make the green go away.

Until finally, in the corner of his eye, he sees little ol Damian. As if Damian were a calming agent, Jason felt his body lax, slowly trudging towards the little boy. The green in his eyes was receding after hours of glowing.

Talia stepped in front of Damian, eyes narrowed in suspicion at what Jason would do next.

Jason just ignored her and continued walking towards the one person who makes him feel safe.

Damian, who arrived in the middle of Jason's bloodbath, stares as he walks closer, but then snaps out of it. He knows his akhi would never hurt him; if anything, he'd hurt himself rather than let any harm befall him.

And so, he takes a step out of his mother's protection, "akhi?" Damian asks in a small voice, unsure.

"D- Damian", Jason stutters out, the distance between the two lessened, and now, they were within touching distance.

In the next second, with extraordinary speed, Jason squeezed Damian into his embrace. His shoulders, which were so full of tension, started relaxing. He rubs his cheeks on top of Damian's head, saying nothing while everyone who survived stares.

Talia was bewildered; she never thought there'd be something to calm the Pit madness, certainly nothing for his father.

So if Damian can calm the boy down, it'd be best to leave them together; they're already close, so they probably won't decline the opportunity to stay close to one another.

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Jason, who constantly jokes about his death.

Jason, who's been told repeatedly by his 'family' to get over it.

Jason, who's breaking down in his safehouse, where no one can see him break.

He doesn't understand how they can just tell him to get over his death.

It's not the fact that he died, but how he died and what his death should've meant.

He died a hero, saving the person who betrayed him. He died in an explosion after being beaten black and blue by a clown Batman refuses to get rid of.

His death was turned into a cautionary tale. Told every sidekick not to be like Jason. "Don't be reckless, you'll get yourself killed like the second Robin", "Think before you act, otherwise you'll get yourself killed like the second Robin", and so on...

His death didn't do anything. It didn't reduce crime rates. Batman didn't help the people Jason would. If anything, Batman beat them up into comas and sent them to the ICU.

Too riddled with 'grief' that he became violent towards thugs, and not towards the rogues who deserved the beating.

Even after countless deaths, his death meant nothing with how the Joker still lived.

Why oh why is that clown still alive? Has he not taken enough lives? Batman himself didn't need to be the one to kill him. But making sure others don't?

How is that justice? What is justice if a hero saves a villain who's killed hundreds of not thousands, of people, including his own goddamn son, and has no chance of rehabilitation?

Where is the justice in that?

So how can he get 'over' his death, when what he wants is not for people to know he's died, but what his death didn't mean, what it didn't change.

Being told to get over his death by the people who should understand trauma responses sure does hurt. You'd think they'd understand where he's coming from, but he guesses it's because it's him speaking and not anyone else.

How can he get over death when it also fundamentally changed him after he came back? He can't be the naive, innocent boy he once was. He was beaten to death by a clown.

As the tears slowly stop flowing, he gets up and flops on his bed, curling into a fetal position. As if to make himself the small boy he once was.

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Jason will never be considered a victim by society. This is because you must meet six criteria from the Ideal Victim Theory to be considered an 'ideal' victim (Christie, 1986).

1. They must have real or perceived weakness - Jason was Robin. Robin is not weak.

2. They must be carrying out a respectable task - Jason had run away from Gotham to 'prove' himself to Bruce. This is not respectable.

3. In no way can they be blamed for what happened to them - Jason can be blamed. He was blamed for his own cause of death. He shouldn't have run away if he didn't want to be killed. His life was twisted into a cautionary tale.

4. The offender was big and bad - The Joker is bad, but he isn't big. Too slim to be considered big.

5. The offender must be unknown and not in a relationship with the victim - Jason, who is Robin, knows the Joker. The Joker knows Robin. Though Joker is Batman's rogue, by being Batman's sidekick, Joker is Robin's enemy.

6. The victim must be strong enough to claim victim status and make their case known - Jason died. He was not able to defend himself. He wasn't able to make his case known. His 'father' was the one who made sure of it.

Jason is a non-ideal victim. A victim who isn't noticed or sidelined by society, not treated as a 'real' victim. It is easier to look the other way; he doesn't fit the stereotype of a victim after all. It is also so much easier to ignore all his suffering, his victimisation, his death, than it is to take accountability for how society and the systems had failed him and played a hand in his death.

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Tim finally acknowledges that Jaybin was not who Bruce or Alfred made him out to be and decides to visit Jason as his safe house.

After disarming the window, he slides in through it in civvies. As he puts his last leg in and rearms the windows, he spots Jason reading a book, sipping a cup of hot chocolate.

Jason does nothing but raise his eyebrow, asking why Tim came to him.

Tim just walks over to Jason, flipping right next to him before saying he's sorry.

"What's all this about, Timtam?"

"Just... I wanted to apologise..."

"Huh? What for?" Jason just looked at Tim, puzzled at the sudden apology.

"For everything. For all the wrongs I've done to you. For 'replacing' you, even though I didn't mean to. For saying bad things about you after you died. I- I've come to realise that you aren't that kind of person and it was wrong of me to say or even think that." Tim said as he buried his face in his hands.

"Hey, you did nothing wrong, Tim. You were just a kid; I don't blame you. Heck- I literally tortured you! I should be apologising for that. I could have killed you for fucks sake, Tim! And yet here you are hanging out with me like it was nothing. If anything, you should be blaming me for what I did, for what I could have done! Or you could even blame Bruce and/or Alfred. What they said about me twisted the way you saw me; it's no wonder you'd think of me the way you did, with what they talked about. Plus, you realised you were wrong and apologised for it instead of not saying anything like them." Jason says gently as he gives a reassuring touch to Tim's arm, a small smile on his face, one full of appreciation and gratitude.

"The fact that you even apologised is enough for me to forgive you, Timmy. Don't go wallow in self-doubt now, okay? That's Dick's coping mechanism, even if it isn't healthy and all that shit."

Tim just snorts, grateful for Jason's lightheartedness. He leans his head into Jason's shoulder.

Jason just wraps an arm around Tim in a comforting manner, slightly changes position so that they're leaning against the back of the couch, so that they're in a more comfy position to watch TV.

"It's movie time, Timberly, and you have no right to refuse" Tim rolls his eyes, snuggling even closer to Jason.

After they get comfy, Jason turns the TV on and plays a movie.

By the end of the fourth movie, Tim is fast asleep on Jason's lap. Jason just smirks as he grabs a pen and starts drawing on Tim's face, snapping pictures of his masterpiece after he finishes.

After all that, he starts running his fingers through Tim's hair softly, humming a song his mum taught him before she overdosed.

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De-aged au where Jason wasn't de-aged to when he was Jaybin, but to when he was catatonic.

When Jason turned into his 16-year-old self, everyone thought he'd be the same as he was now, just younger. But no.

16-year-old Jason was like a shell of a person. Standing, staring at nothing. Responding to nothing, as if he wasn't truly present. However, one of the people the bats were fighting tried to attack Red Hood with a metal bat since he would be an easy target, given how he doesn't respond to anything. The bats that saw this tried to run to Jason to protect him. However, Red Hood attacked the man. Like a reflex, his movements were too mechanical, no special flair he usually has when fighting. As if he were fighting on autopilot. The bats sighed in relief and decided that Jason could protect himself and refocused on making sure none of their opponents were standing.

As the fight dragged on, the opponents made sure not to fight the younger Red Hood, as when someone did, they were either beaten to a pulp, close to death or had died. No one else wanted to try their luck.

Then, as one of them managed to get a hit on Robin, Red Hood had basically teleported with how fast to travelled to where Robin was from where he originally was standing. Red Hood then decapitated the man's head before walking up to Robin, picking him up despite Robin's struggle to get free. Then, he walked over to the wall, sat down, cuddled even closer to Robin, and threw Robin's birdarang whenever someone got too close. His precision was deadly.

Everyone in the room had stopped, watching Robin thrash around at first until giving up and leaning into Red Hood's hug with a sigh, arms crossed with an obviously displeased expression.

"TT, father, I expect you to hurry up and finish so I can escape this embarrassing position."

Shocked at what he was witnessing, Batman took a while to process what was said to him before nodding and capturing the last of their opponents, who were still too shocked to move.

After handing them off to the GCPD, the bats tried to get Jason to get up and come back to the cave; however, he refused to move from his spot, and they didn't dare to force him up due to Damian's warning. But Jason was not responding to anything they said, which was worrying them, that is, until Damian started speaking.

"Akhi, it is safe in the cave; you can cuddle me as much as you want there." At this, Jason promptly stands up while Damian guides him to the Batmobile.

"..."

"What the heck did we just witness?!" Tim just exclaimed in disbelief that not only was Damian being tame, but that he didn't say anything rude about Jason? And he called Jason 'Akhi'? What the hell!

-

After getting back to the Batcave, Damian explained about how Jason was with the LOA during his years after coming back from the dead, but was in a catatonic state until his mother pushed him into the pit which 'fixed' his mind, bringing him back from his catatonic state at the cost of amplifying his emotions, which was why he was so angry at Bruce when he first came back.

Damian said that while in Jason's lap, while getting his head patted.

It was a conflicting scene. Jason, face blank but stroking Damian's head softly, while Damian was in his lap, scowling with his arms crossed, but was leaning back against Jason as if it was something natural.

Damian then added that the reason Jason is acting like this right now is that during his catatonic state, Jason was placed as Damian's guard due to the way he would protect Damian from any danger since the first time Damian was attacked in Jason's sight. As if Jason were a mama lion and Damian his cub.

"Now, hurry up and call Zatanna. Akhi hates letting anyone know what happened when he was catatonic."

Bruce just nods before turning away to call Zatanna while the others still look at Jason in bewilderment. Luckily for Jason and Damian, Zatanna was unusually free and would only take an hour to get there, much to the others' displeasure.

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Jason Toddler suddenly appears in front of Jason Todd, who is Red Hood.

Jason just looks down at his mini-me in disbelief, thinking about what to do.

His mini-me is dressed in a Robin costume, wearing a black and red jacket on top with a red bucket as a... Hat?

If it were anyone else, Jason would say this was probably the cutest thing he's seen.

Anyways, he crouches down to face his... Uhhh... Toddler version of himself?

"Do you wanna come back to my place?" Jason Toddler, as Jason decides on his nickname, nods his head enthusiastically and then points to the space next to him.

Jason looks down at where Jason Toddler was pointing and sees... A Damian Toddler..? What the actual fuck?!

He wasn't sure what to do now. Sure, maybe he could look after one, but two? No way in hell-

He looks at the two expectant stares, sighs and runs a hand through his hair.

"c'mon, let's get going", whatever, he'll deal with it somehow.

Surprisingly, the two Toddlers follow Jason complacently with no trouble, to which Jason was grateful.

However, as soon as the three stepped into one of Jason's safehouses, all hell broke loose.

Damian Toddler ran all around the place, breaking all sorts of things. Even in a different universe, Damian is a menace one way or another.

And there's his mini-me, he's just staring at the chaos Damian Toddler is making with a huge grin on his face, as if he were proud or something.

After a few minutes more of chaos, he claps his hands to get the two Toddlers' attention.

"Why don't you two help me with baking, and I'll let you have some after we finish?" Damian Toddler rushes to stand in front of Jason, next to Jason Toddler, who was jumping up and down in excitement.

Jason just smirks in amusement as he leads the two to the kitchen.

"Alright, we're gonna make shortbread cookies. Do you guys know the recipe, or do you want me to tell you what ingredients we need?"

Not responding, the two head to the pantry and fridge, digging out the ingredients needed. Jason guesses that they aren't very vocal; more action and words, he supposes.

Then they started working in surprising harmony as they made the shortbread cookies.

A few hours had passed, and they finally finished baking the cookies. The two Toddlers raced around the kitchen top, too excited to finally have some cookies after waiting ten minutes for them to cool down.

Jason just chuckles as he puts some cookies on three plates and heads towards the couch, placing the three plates on the table.

"Dig in" he says as he turns on the TV to put a movie on, deciding on The Lion King, which seemed to be a good decision with how the two bobbed and swayed their head in sync to the music, completely enthralled by the movie as they munch on the cookies.

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When Jason came back from the dead and was pushed into the Lazarus Pit, there wasn't only one thing that came out.

The first thing that came out was Jason who had a massive growth spurt, growing as big as a tank. He would've been had he not been malnourished, but man was it a shocker seeing a small 16 year-old boy suddenly turn into a a full on tank of a man.

And then, another body came out. It wasn't like the big body that came out earlier, but it also wasn't the 16-year-old boy who was pushed in.

No. It was a much younger Jason Todd, Jason who was dressed as Robin but wasn't wearing his domino mask. After opening his eyes, Jaybin whipped his head to bigger Jason and rushed towards him, jumping onto the man's back and clinging onto the body as if his life depended on it, while glaring at anyone who seemed like a threat.

Jason could feel how close the boy was to growling, as if he were an animal. Which, to be fair, probably didn't help that all the assassin's aside from Talia, had their swords out, ready for a fight.

Needless to say, bigger Jason was just flustered, seeing a younger (?) version of himself as Robin, jump onto his apparently bigger body? He looks down, and it just feels weird, his body not feeling right, too tall, too big, just too much, but the warmth he feels on his back grounds him enough to see and recognise Talia, who is in front of him.

"What is going on, Talia? What- What happened to me? I'm pretty sure I'm not supposed to be alive right now. And how is he also here right now?!" He pointed to his younger self, who was still glaring at all the assassins.

Talia looks deep in thought and answers in a matter that was loud enough to just be heard, "It's been documented that some people who enter the Lazarus come out with their 'core' personified. This," she points to the little Jason and speak in a clearer voice, "is who you are as a person, your 'core' self so to say."

Jason frowns, "Okay..? That still doesn't explain how I'm even standing here right now."

"Right, maybe we should have this conversation somewhere else."

At this, Jason finally takes his surroundings in and decides that despite him not knowing what the fuck was going on, it would probably be best to not talk about his resurrection(?) here.

Nodding, he follows Talia upstairs, out of the cave.

The two walk until Talia stops in front of a room and enters it; Jason follows behind her and sits down on the seat not occupied after shifting Jaybin to cling onto him from the front, basically being cuddled by the small boy, with how tightly he was clinging onto Jason.

"Okay, now explain what the ever flying fuck is going on right now."

Talia looked amused for a second, seeing the sight in front of her before straightening her expression.

"Firstly, we have no idea how you came back from the dead; however, you were found on a day out on the streets of Gotham in a catatonic state. One of my men recognised your fighting skills and told me. I then found you and took you back, deciding if I could heal you and give you back to my Beloved, he'd look at me more positively. Secondly, however, the progress was slow and even after a year, there was little improvement, and so, I decided to use the Lazarus Pit to fix your broken mind. Not only did it do that, it also seemed to fix any malnourishment you apparently had and personified your 'core', or in other words, your 'soul'."

Jason just sat in silence after Talia finished. That... Was a lot to take in. But he needs to know something.

"Ho- How is Bruce?"

"My Beloved is... It would probably be better for you to check yourself." Talia responds as she grabs a nearby newspaper, chucking it onto the table in front of Jason.

Jason picks up the newspaper and reads the headline, [BATMAN AND ROBIN RETURN THE JOKER BACK TO ARKHAM ASYLUM]

...

What?

No...

That can't be right... Can it?

Then, Jaybin just starts crying unprompted, tears falling one after the other.

"Huh?! What's wrong? Don't cry, hmm?" Jason says softly, trying to comfort his younger self, wiping away the tears that continue to fall.

"He's crying because that's how you feel, Jason. He is 'you' after all. He's still a part of you."

And that, that just makes it worse. He can hear his younger self mumbling, "There's no way Bruce would replace me, right...? I- I am his son after all, right..? I- T- There's no way the Joker is still alive and taking lives... Right...?"

Jason just closes his eyes, he really doesn't want to see how he's really feeling right now. Too many emotions coursing through him; from pain to anger to betrayal.

Please, just let this be a nightmare...

As if understanding that Jason needed some time alone to process everything he's learnt, she quietly gets up from her seat and leaves the room.

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Jason realised he was never a son to Bruce. Only a soldier in his war. He was Robin before he was Jason Todd-Wayne.

In fact, he wasn't even a Wayne; he was just Jason Todd to Bruce, as evident by both his gravestone and memorial case.

It only took him a few years and dying to realise that Bruce never thought of him as a son.

After all...

A father wouldn't replace his son six months after his death, now would he?

However, since he was a soldier, he's replaceable, expendable.

It makes sense as to why he was replaced so shortly after his death. As if it meant nothing to the man who was supposed to be his father.

It makes sense why he doesn't have the name Jason Todd-Wayne, and just Jason Todd on his gravestone and memorial case. Because that's all he is: a soldier.

Jason was only a pawn in the war Batman had against Gotham. And once his use was up? He was thrown away like any other prawn that has no use.

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Red Hood is adored by the residents of Crime Alley for the simple fact that he's willing to do anything to protect them, even going so far as to murder the pieces of scum who deserve it. Something Batman and his entourage could and wouldn't ever do, as it was 'beneath' them to kill someone who deserved it. Them and their stuck-up morals that result in more and more victims. Doesn't help that the GCPD are too scared to even enter Crime Alley either. Assholes.

It sure as hell doesn't help that, in addition to not doing what Crime Alley needs, Batman only comes to Crime Alley once a year to 'mourn' someone or something. So they're especially grateful to Red Hood, who takes his time of day to protect Crime Alley whenever he's in Gotham and makes sure that it's safe, well, as safe as it'll get.

So when they figured out Red Hood's identity -which was honestly pretty easy, what with the next door neighbour Jay Peter's being the same build, same kindness and everything, pretty hard not to realise- they all kept quiet.

They even realised that Red Hood used to be the second Robin. Their beloved Robin who came from Crime Alley and would help those in need before chasing after the bad guys. Another reason to like Jay and Red Hood.

I mean, it was pretty obvious since both Jay and Red Hood had a Crime Alley accent, despite Red Hood using a voice modulator.

So whenever anyone outside of Crime Alley asked, they flipped them off, saying it's none of their goddamn business who Red Hood is. Because it really wasn't.

If Red Hood wanted his identity known, they'd tell them. If Red Hood doesn't want his identity known, then they'd never say it, not even as a whisper. Their mouths were shut tight.

But they want Red Hood and Jay Peter's to know that he's loved and appreciated, so whenever someone spots him, they walk up to him, chat a little and force their gifts onto him before quickly dashing so that there's no way for the gifts to be refused.

The gifts ranged from home-baked goods to nice teas, a few of them saved up to buy, to books after finding out that Jay was an avid reader, especially of classics. Some a cute as a bear headband or stuffed toys, the kids are the obvious offenders.

When they run away after giving the gifts, they sometimes turn back to see Jay scoff as a small smile makes its way to his face. From that, they just know that Jay appreciates their gifts and cherishes them in his apartment. This just makes them love Jay and Red Hood even more. Especially when they see Jay or Red Hood using their gift the next day, if it's something wearable or reading one of the books he was recently gifted.

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Ever since Jason came back from the grave, Bruce has been doing his all to 'fix' him.

But Jason doesn't need 'fixing', he needed confirmation, proof that his so-called father and the rest of his family love him; that despite him being broken in many ways, having done bad things, he would still be accepted by his family and that they'd help him through the tough period of his life.

But no.

He was a criminal before a victim. And there is no love for a criminal.

All there is is 'fixing' the criminal. And that's what they tried to do.

But you can't 'fix' people, only help and support them to become better.

And you know what they did to fucking 'fix' him? It was by fucking throwing him in the fucking shithole that was Arkham Asylum.

As if the place wasn't corrupt enough. As if the place wasn't a fucking revolving door where rogues escape daily and bribe all the guards and had full control of it.

If anything...

Being put there by his so-called 'family' made him worse. Broke him down even further from all the trauma he already had. Now there was truly no hope in 'fixing', or better yet, helping Jason. It's now far too late for that.

Jason never should've hoped.

Should've never hoped for a family that would accept him.

Should've never expected Bruce Wayne- Batman to do anything to help him when it was so obvious that the man never thought of him as a son.

Should've never hoped that his family would help him when all he was was a victim at heart, crying out for help that no one heard. If they did hear, they ignored it.

As his last year fell, he swore he would never again trust the bats, especially Batman.

Jason's learnt his lesson this time, and he's going to make them regret it.

-

Little did Jason know, all the bats except Bruce were wondering where Jason had disappeared to, not knowing what had happened after one of his encounters with Batman. Not even Oracle could find any traces of him. Just up and disappeared into the air.

They tried demanding Bruce for answers, but the stoic man kept quiet, saying it was none of their business. But it was, because Jason was family, wasn't he? How could Bruce act like this when it was about his son? One so clearly traumatised and in desperate need of help?

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When you think of Jason Todd, you think of a loyal dog.

A dog that will do anything for its owner, no matter what its owner has done to it. Will follow his owner till the day he dies.

But in all honesty? Jason is more like a cat.

A cat that is suspicious of you at first, not trusting you until you prove yourself worthy, and once that trust is forged with someone? He'll stick right next to them, caring about and making sure they're all right and safe. However, if they do something wrong, he will make it known, and it'll take ages for them to regain the trust they broke, especially if it was something very bad.

Just like how cats love their space, Jason too loves his personal space, not liking when people intrude on it when he doesn't want company. It's only okay when he initiates it; otherwise, they can go fuck themselves.

When Jason feels cornered, he lashes out, hoping that it will keep himself safe, whether that be physically or mentally.

Jason also up and disappears like a cat, here one minute, gone the next. People can't tell when he leaves, but if he's comfy enough with them, they'll know when he arrives. Shamelessly invading their space like it's nothing.

So if anything, Jason is a cat rather than a dog.

Chapter Text

"Why can't you and Bruce just get along?!" Dick exclaims, running a hand through his hair in frustration.

"Can't you see how much he loves you? Why do you keep being so antagonistic towards him?!"

But Jason does know. He knows how much Bruce 'loves' him, but that doesn't change the fact that he threw a batarang at his son's neck. It doesn't change the fact that he beat his son into a coma for point-blanking a rogue. It doesn't change the fact that he brought his son to the place where he was brutally murdered to relive his most dreaded memories in hopes of getting his other son back.

If anything, it only makes the fact that Bruce loves him worse. How could Bruce love him and do all that to him? How in God's name could he possibly ever justify what he did?

Sure, Bruce is 'trying', but each time he takes a step forward, he takes five back.

Jason just sighs, pinching his nose, "Do you even know half the things he's done to me? Because if you did... You'd probably understand why I'm not exactly on 'friendly' terms with Bruce."

"What do you mean by 'half the things he's done to you'?" Dick asks, confused. "What has Bruce done to you, Jason?"

Jason snorts, "Of course, golden boy doesn't know shit. Well then... Let me enlighten you," he says in a playful tone, a smirk making its way to his face, unfitting for what they're talking about.

"First off, did you know the reason why I ran away to Ethiopia?" Jason asked with an amused smile.

"Because you were trying to prove yourself to Bruce by beating the Joker up..?" Dick replies, voice uncertain, not knowing where the conversation is heading.

Jason snorts again, shaking his head, "Of course, he took it like that. Well, let me tell you, I didn't even know Joker was in Ethiopia. I was there because I went to meet my biological mother. I went to meet my biological mother because Bruce had benched me from Robin and said he 'didn't need a teenage rebellion and that I wasn't his son'." Jason says sarcastically, as he uses air quotes to imitate what Bruce once said to him.

"And then I was fucking betrayed by my 'mother' who told me Joker wasn't in the warehouse, only for her to give me to him when we went inside," Jason says with a shrug.

"Anyways, that was before I died. Now for when I came back? He threw a batarang at my neck," he pulls his neck turtle down to show Dick the scar, making sure that Dick won't be able to refute or deny it.

"This happened when I asked Daddy dearest who he'd choose between the Joker and me. You can probably tell who he chose. Next was when I shot Penguin at point-blank range. You know how he responded? He didn't care enough to realise I didn't actually kill Penguin and basically put me into a goddman fucking coma. Beat me so badly I nearly died right then and there if only Roy wasn't there to save me."

Dick just stood there frozen, face frozen in shock, unable to even whisper a word. Only small sounds escaped his mouth, but Jason wasn't done.

"And you remember when Damian died?" Dick flinches at the reminder of that time period.

"You wanna know what Bruce did? He dragged me to Ethiopia, masking the trip as revenge for Damian, but actually brought me there to relive my most traumatic memories to see if there was any way to get Damian back, like how I did. He didn't even care how I broke there, fucking beating me up for being 'selfish' by not helping him get Damian back by reliving those memories?" Jason's voice rises, emotions flooding out of him.

Jason laughs, exhausted. "I do know Bruce loves me, I know he's trying his best. But after everything he's done?" His laugh turns into something painful, "I just can't. I can't go back to when Bruce and I had a good relationship. Not after everything he's done to me, in the name of 'love'." Jason's voice was so high and filled with tears, his body slightly shaking.

"Sure, he's 'mourned' me, but beyond that? Nothing. He didn't learn his lesson about having a kid join his sick war. He didn't even improve Gotham the way I would've wanted him to. In fact, he did the fucking opposite!" Jason was screaming now, a tear falling down his cheek. He can't do this anymore, and so, he turns and rushes out, anywhere but here.

Dick, who was left alone, doesn't know how to respond to all that info dumping about Jason.

Just...

What has Bruce done?

The Bruce he knows would never do those things. But then again...

Does he even know the current Bruce? The Bruce that changed so much after Jason died, and not in a positive way...

Chapter Text

Red Hood, who is thrown into Arkham, where all the rogues who have grudges against him are. Who are readily looking forward to beating up the Almighty Red Hood, who's thwarted their plan since his Robin days.

That is, until a few days later, when they see the face underneath the helmet.

They see a young man, not older than 20, with scars littering his face and body. No hint of childhood in his eyes, too hardened from whatever he's experienced throughout his life.

And when night comes... They hear the mutters of sorrys, and curses, things thrown to the wall. Laboured breaths that's just barely hearable.

The rogues start feeling bad. No child should be that traumatised. They may be rogues, but they aren't monsters, excluding the Joker. Ever since the Joker killed the second Robin, everyone has done their best to avoid him, finding what he did sick and disgusting. If any of the rogues were a monster, it'd be the Joker and only him.

Instead of beating Red Hood up, they looked after him. Gave him extra food during meals. Slipping a book or two to the young man after finding out he was a literature lover. Making sure that whenever the Joker was in Arkham, he stayed far, far away from Red Hood.

A few rogues like Penguin, Bane, Riddler, Croc, and Harley planned to break out and take Red Hood with them; he clearly didn't belong in Arkham of all places. Hood isn't insane, and the fact that Batman, of all people, put him there? It baffled them. And so they decided to adopt Hood into their Rogues gallery, since Batman clearly didn't want him.

Even though Jason was suspicious of the rogues' caring attitude towards him at first, he slowly got comfortable with them. Feeling that these villains truly do care about him and show it, something Bruce could never do. After countless days of being essentially taken care of, he starts lowering his guard, no longer glaring at them with suspicion, and instead starts to enjoy their company. They start feeling like family, and he reels in it.

Of all the rogues, he feels the closest to Harley. For the simple reason being they're victims of the same guy. Seeing Harley move on from him and getting together with Pamela? It's nice, and he felt happy for Harley for moving on with her life and getting what she deserves, because she most definitely does not deserve the Joker. Plus, the way they can just trash on him? It's become a fun pastime for the two.

So, when the rogues decided to break out and bring him along? He felt his heart warming, a small smile forming on his face as he thought he finally has a family that cares about him and would do anything for him. Especially after seeing Harley come back after disappearing for a bit with blood all over her, a bright grin plastered all over her face as she told him and the rest of the rogues that she finally killed the Joker.

Chapter Text

Jason never reintegrated back into the Batfamily.

For the simple reason being: Bruce Wayne.

It was because Bruce didn't learn from his death. To never again have children fight in their war and endanger them. Never again use the costume that causes a child's death.

In fact, Bruce did the opposite; he endangered countless children by putting them in a costume that a child died in, and used said child as a lesson of what 'not' to be.

But Jason was never like how Bruce described him. Or at least, not to the same degree.

Sure, he was angry, reckless, and all that... But not for the reason he said Jason was.

He wasn't innately angry at the world. He was angry at the injustice victims faced. How some never get to see justice play out.

He wasn't reckless like Bruce said he was. He didn't rush to fight Joker to 'prove' himself to him. No, he didn't even know Joker was there! He just wanted to save his mother; how is that reckless?

Plus, these traits aren't specific to him. Every other Robin has also been angry and reckless.

But noooo- it's only Jason who's labelled as the failure, Robin who's angry and reckless!

Bruce also not only had Jason's grave in the public cemetery, but on his gravestone, it only had [HERE LIES - JASON TODD], not fucking Jason Todd-Wayne! This just screams the fact that Jason was never a Wayne despite being formally 'adopted' by Bruce.

In addition to that, there was a goddamn fucking memorial case in the Batcave. One that says, [In memory of Jason Todd - Robin - A good soldier].

Jason was never a son to Bruce.

No.

He was a fucking soldier and a 'good' one, despite him saying all sorts of things that tarnished his name and who he was as a person.

What a joke.

No way in fucking hell is Jason going to be family with someone who does all that to him. To someone who clearly shows that Jason was never family, never a son.

He's better off with Talia and Damian, who care about him and treat him as real family. They make sure that Jason knows he's an al Ghul and that they'd do anything for him. Even torturing and killing the stupid clown that killed him. The only reason they haven't is that he thought Bruce would be willing to let Jason kill that fucking clown. Jason was going to kill the thing because he knew Bruce was incapable of killing, so the next best thing was for him to let Jason kill the fucking shit. But no. What he got was a fucking batarang to his neck. He is not going back to the fucker that sliced his son's throat.

The fact that Bruce refused to let Jason kill the Joker, who is fucking sick. Not only did he confirm Jason's thoughts that Bruce never thought of him as a son, but he also confirmed that his morals are also fucked. He's willing to throw rogues in a prison that's as useless as a spoon with a huge ass hole in the middle, but he isn't willing to stop them from creating more victims permanently. He's fine with beating goons into comas and debt, but not murder.

He's literally indirectly killing them by doing those things, but no. He draws the line at direct killing. Hypocritical fucker.

So no. He is not going back to the 'family' that so clearly does not want him. He's going back to the family that does want him, even at his lowest, and can accept him killing and making a real change in the world.

Chapter Text

"What. Is. That." Jason stares at the glass case in the cave. Confusion marring his face as he tries to process what he's seeing.

The domino mask he wore as Robin. The red, green, and yellow suits he used to wear as he beat criminals up. It was in a case, light flashing up at it as if it were an attraction in a museum. At the bottom, there was a plaque.

[Here lies Jason Todd - Robin - A good soldier]

A... A good soldier...?

A fucking soldier?!

Jason clenches his hands into fists until they're white. Fury seeping onto his face.

Is that all he was? A fucking soldier?! Not Bruce's fucking son.

No.

A goddamn fucking soldier. That was all he was.

He could feel tears threatening to fall. The others looked at him cautiously, not wanting to trigger Jason even more but also wanting to calm him down.

No fucking chance of that.

Jason breaths out. And turns towards Bruce, eyes showing just how hurt he was, the betrayal of seeing such a thing.

"I've been working with you for how long again?" He says sarcastically, scoffing, but his eyes were full of tears. Just from that alone, it was clear what he was feeling.

"Hmm..." He 'ponders'.

"Ah- right! Six months." He spats out.

"Six fucking months of knowing I'm alive and working together with me." The spite in Jason's voice was transparent.

"So... Why the ever flying fuck," he points at the case, "is that still fucking up?!" He yells, emotion pouring out.

All the bat kids looked down as if ashamed. Dick looked heartbroken, seeing his little brother so miserable right now, and it was because of them.

Bruce just stared at Jason. Minuscule movements in his expression that would be invisible to an untrained individual. But everyone in the cave was.

Jason saw how Bruce was thinking of how to respond. Of how to act. "Don't you fucking dare lie to me, Bruce! Say the honest truth!" Jason says, seething.

Bruce opens his mouth but then quickly closes it. He doesn't say a word...

"Ha!" Jason scoffs.

"I see how it is. I'm not the little soldier that died, am I?" Dick makes a choked sound at that, shaking his head, tears forming in his eyes.

Jason whips his head to Dick, "Stay the fuck out of this, Dick."

He turns back to Bruce.

"So what? I'm back from the dead, but you refuse the acknowledge that, as evident by the fucking memorial case?" He waved his hand towards where the case was.

Jason scoffs again and mutters, "And here I thought I was welcomed back into this family... Clearly not..."

"You are, Jaylad-"

"THEN WHY THE FUCK IS IT STILL UP?!" Jason interrupts Bruce; this time, the tears that threatened to fall were falling, streaming down his face.

"Why... Why is it still up when I'm clearly alive?" Jason throws one of his arms out as the other clutches at his chest, his every move screaming desperation.

"From what I understand, you don't want me back, do you? You have a dead 'soldier' that you can use as a lesson for future Robins... 'Don't do this! Don't do that!' You never cared that I'm alive again, do you? You don't understand that I am still the boy that you adopted... Why can't you see that? The boy is still me, and I'm him? Why..." Tears were flooding out of his eyes, his voice scratchy from screaming earlier and from his heightened emotions.

Not waiting for a response, he turns towards his motorcycle. "I- I just fucking can't anymore, Bruce... Don't contact me", and before any of the other bats could stop Jason, he drove off in a rush.

They all stood there, frozen for a while until Dick turned to Bruce and started screaming at him for what he caused and that he never should've let that stupid case stay up before rushing out, fuming.

Chapter Text

Bruce should've known better. A person who was born into crime will never change.

Bruce believes in rehabilitation, but for some people who were born into crime... He'd rather not think about it.

As he stands across Red Hood in a standoff, glaring at each other, neither moves to make the first move.

He should've known that Hood wouldn't- couldn't possibly change. Hood was already a criminal by the time he found him, stealing tyres and all that. All Hood is is another bit of dirt in the sewers.

And because Hood is a criminal, putting lives at risk, he has to stop him.

No matter the cost.

He should not show any leniency to the man. The man who was once his 'son'. But his damn emotions were getting in the way, not letting him deal out justice, all for the sake of some nostalgia for the little boy who would smile so brightly at him.

And thus, Batman rushes towards Hood, dodging the incoming strikes, clenching his hands into a fist and thrusting them towards Hood's right abdomen.

Batman punches the man over and over again after getting him to fall backwards. But...

He doesn't realise that the man wasn't retaliating, too caught up in his emotions and the need to stop Hood.

He only comes to when an arrow is shot towards him, barely dodging it. He looks up and sees Arsenal getting ready to shoot another arrow at him. He quickly gets up, leaving the unconscious man in favour of dodging not only arrows, but also flame balls.

Starfire, he notes. He shouldn't fight them, not with Starfire, who could cause intergalactic war by getting hurt. And thus, he runs back to the Batmobile, back to the cave.

It's fine, Batman tells himself. He stopped Hood. He won't be committing any crime any time soon. Any guilt he feels is useless, and he blocks it out.

He just has to focus on his mission and nothing else.

Chapter Text

If you asked Damian, he'd say that Jason was a huge hugger.

Damian had unfortunately been the bean bag who would be hugged nearly 24/7 if not for meal time and training that they had to do when Jason was catatonic.

After regaining his mind, however, Jason now hardly initiates hugs. Only doing so on special occasions.

Despite this, it's quite obvious that Jason yearns for physical connection, finding comfort in it, but is not brave enough to do what his heart desires.

Whenever Damian so much as hugs him lightly, you can just tell how happy Jason is. Tension leaves his body, a small, gentle smile forming as he leans in to hug back.

Damian would tell you how touch-starved Jason was. How even if he barely initiated hugs, if there was someone he was comfortable with, safe with, then he'd always, always hover around them, ready to protect them from any potential threats.

-

If you asked Dick... He'd shrug, saying that Jason wasn't a big hugger, especially after his return from death.

Sure as Robin, he loved hugging others, but after he returned, he was always scowling and on guard, face turning down whenever anyone so much as touched him.

So he doesn't hug Jason. Jason doesn't need hugs anyway, right?

Plus, he has Tim and Damian, whom he can hug. Why would he hug Jason, who clearly doesn't want it?

-

If you asked Tim, he'd be baffled.

The thought of hugging Jason? The thought alone makes him shiver.

Sure, he's been getting along with Jason recently, but the closest they'd get is Jason ruffling Tim's hair. A hug would just be too out of character for Jason, who's rough and all that.

The thought of not only Dick, but Dick and Jason hugging him? Exhausting. He's already tired of Dicks hugs sometimes (although they are always nice), he doesn't need more.

-

If you asked Steph, she'd say that Jason is just a big softie who's too scared to initiate hugs but loves it when he receives them.

Steph learnt about it when she thought of a good prank for Jason; jumping onto him and hugging the 'rough' guy to shock him.

What happened was the opposite of what she thought would happen. Instead of being sarcastic and throwing her off, Jason just gently pats her, reciprocating her hug, no roughness in sight.

She would say that if Jason had a tail, it'd make a tornado with how happy he was.

Since then, she'd always lean onto Jason, and Jason would never stop her, and instead would shift slightly to make her more comfortable.

-

Just like Steph, Cass had similar thoughts.

She could see how Jason's body conveyed envy sometimes, whenever he saw Dick hugging one of the other siblings. How happy he was when someone was hugging him.

She could see how much hugs meant to him, how he lets his guard down as soon as someone starts to cuddle against him, as if they were a calming agent.

It made her happy. To see Jason relax after having his guard up all the time. To see a sliver of a smile whenever someone close to him is around and leans into him.

-

If you ask Duke, he'd also shrug.

But he'd say that Jason was pretty chill about hugs, not shying away from it, but also not too imposing like Dick could be sometimes.

He wouldn't initiate hugs with Jason, but he knew if he needed one, Jason would always be willing to give one, which gives him peace of mind.

He would also say that if he didn't want any of the other bats' insistent care when he gets injured, he could rely on Jason to look after him, giving enough space without being too distant.

Not going all out in his caring, but not enough to feel suffocating.

Jason always showed enough care to show that Duke mattered to him without overstepping boundaries, making casual jokes or jabs here and there to lighten the mood.

Chapter Text

Bruce condemns Jason for killing. For being on a happy murder spree that killed innocents.

But that was far from the truth.

Not once has Jason killed an innocent person. He's only ever killed those who deserved it. Rapists, traffickers, drug dealers, pedophiles, abusers, serial killers, Joker goons, you name it.

But never would Jason kill someone who hasn't done anything bad. Never.

He knows what's right and wrong. Sure, he kills people, but it's to make sure that no one else becomes a victim. So that innocent people can avoid needless suffering, something Batman refuses to do.

Even when he stopped killing for two whole fucking years, they still treaded carefully, as if Jason was a rabid dog waiting for the right moment to wreak havoc.

But Jason is just so sick of it, the way they look at him, treat him. They don't treat Jason like a son, a sibling. No.

They look at him like he's a murderer, a criminal.

Which is true in a way, but... Not the way they're thinking.

He's not some mindless killer. He doesn't just shoot anyone he sees. He planned them, making sure they deserved it. He would never drag an innocent down and make their family suffer for something he did.

Just why can they understand? They don't even have to do it themselves, just acknowledging Jason's methods and not condemning him for what he thinks is right. He's not like Batman, who forces his morals onto everyone; all he wants is acceptance from his supposed family...

He hates how no one looks at the proper him, only seeing the 'failure' Robin or the little boy he once was. Their eyes convey the message that he's not who they remember him as, that their little boy would never do something so horrendous.

But he's still that boy; he still has the same hobbies, just that he's now following his morals that are slightly different.

Just... Why oh why can't they see that? He's so tired. Tired of being used when convenient to only be thrown away and treated like dirt.

He's sick of it all.

If they don't want to understand him, fine. But forcing Jason to compromise everything about him, just to give him the barest of love and attention? His moral, his methods, everything? Jason just can't anymore. He's given too much for a family that gives nothing in return. They don't even forgive him for his crimes, always using it to stab him in the back, using his past to say why he can't be trusted. As if he didn't do everything they asked him, he bent over like a dog.

He realised all of this one night, after looking in the mirror, seeing a stranger's face instead of his own. It shocked him how bad he looked, but not once had any of the bats asked Jason if anything was wrong.

No.

Instead, they asked more and more of him, and he felt suffocated.

He needs to get away from the bats. Take a break from Gotham...

He won't leave forever since Gotham is as much his as it is Batman's or any other Gothamite. She belongs to no one after all. But Gotham is where he was born and grew up; he can't just leave her, or Crime Alley. But right now...

He needs a break from everything. From all the toxicity.

Maybe he'd go back to the all-caste for a bit? See Essence and annoy the fuck out of her?

Sounds like a good idea. And with that, he starts packing.

Chapter Text

Jason never learnt how to be a child.

It was a privilege taken away from him too early.

He had to mature fast when his mother started getting addicted, having to help her when needed.

He never had a normal childhood.

He was homeless for a few years, not learning at school like a normal childhood would.

He was Robin before he was Jason.

There was no way Bruce would want him if he wasn't Robin.

Why else would billionaire Bruce Wayne want a street rat? All he was was a charity case, a replacement for the golden boy.

And then he died. Never having learnt how to be a child. Or even how to act his age.

But when he came back, everyone expected him to act like the adult he physically was. But mentally, he was still the small boy who never learnt how to be a child, who never learnt how to be a teenager or even an adult.

So when he acts out in the only way he knows how, everyone bashes him, expecting him to be better, to not be the way he was.

But how can he if he never learnt how to? Why can't they see that he's trying to reach out, screaming for help in the only way he knows how to?

Why can't they see that he isn't the man he physically is, but the small boy whose life was taken before his wings could grow and support him?

Chapter Text

Jason has always been easily spooked. It's just that he's gotten very good at hiding his shock during his childhood years.

But... After he died and his mind was fresh from the poisonous green unholy water, it was as if he had lost that ability. So whenever an assassin is behind him and either starts talking or taps him on the shoulder, he jumps in shock, hand raised to his chest to calm his rapid heartbeat.

He tried to relearn how to hide his shock but miserably failed each time.

And when Damian, who became very attached to Jason, found out?

Oh boy-

Damian was- and still is a menace. He hasn't stopped even after arriving in Gotham.

It started when Damian pranked Jason by hanging from somewhere high and then dropping down in front of Jason to scare him.

The reaction Jason gave made Damian smirk in victory, something so rarely seen with how high the expectations were on him due to being the demon heir.

The only reason why Ra's 'approved' (totally not threatened by Jason) of Damian finding new ways to scare Jason instead of more rigorous training was, quote-on-quote, 'to learn how to be stealthy'.

If Jason finds Damian before Damian can scare him, then extra training for Damian, but if he manages to scare Jason, then he can have a free hour to do anything he wants.

And thus, the routine of Damian finding new and creative ways to scare Jason started.

Some were as easy as tapping his back while Jason was walking somewhere; some were as creative as jumping out of the pond when Jason was relaxing there in his downtime.

Even when the two were in Gotham, this routine never disappeared. In fact, it brought about new ways to scare Jason.

So even though Damian no longer needed to scare Jason to get an hour of free time, he does it anyway because, firstly, it's funny; secondly, it's a good bonding activity for the two; thirdly, it's good practice to see if his stealth is top-notch since Jason had gotten good at spotting him.

However, they make sure to do it when the two of them are alone with no spectators. They don't want the others to know and join in. It's only for the two of them, the routine holds a special place in their hearts and is filled with precious embarrassing memories that neither of them wants intruded on.

Chapter Text

Jason finds the hero community a joke.

He once looked up to heroes with admiration, but now?

Now they can burn in hell, all he cares about.

Batman's the worst offender.

He always said that the rogues deserved another chance, that they could be rehabilitated.

And yet...

When his own son dies, not only does he trample on Jason's name, he says that nothing could've fixed Jason's 'impulsive' and 'reckless' behaviour. Jason caused his own death.

It's disgusting.

What hero blames a child for their death?

Anyone who blames or talks badly about a child's death does not deserve the title of hero.

A hero is someone who always looks on the bright side, sees the good in people, and helps those who struggle or make bad decisions.

A hero does not talk badly about the dead, does not tarnish a child's name, does not use a child's death as a cautionary tale.

Real heroes do not physically or mentally abuse their child in a fit of 'anger'. Would not beat up their former son to the brink of death despite their no-kill rule, and felt no remorse about it.

A real hero wouldn't have traumatised children as sidekicks to save them from a 'criminal life', despite them needing the opposite.

A real hero would instead make sure they were okay, help them through their trauma, and definitely not recruit them in a crusade that could get them killed. They might help the child find a goal, like becoming a police officer, a support worker, a priest, a racer for charity, literally anything else!

A real hero would realise when they make mistakes and learn from them, would atone for their mistakes and take accountability, reflecting on what they did wrong.

But no one in the Justice League ever acted like a real hero for Jason.

No.

He got the complete opposite. He was treated like a punching bag.

Why should he admire the hero community when they sure as hell don't act like a hero to him? What is it about Jason that makes them unable to be a hero to him?

Why just him? What did he do wrong? Was it his fault for being born in the lower class? For living in Crime Alley? For just wanting a parental figure to love him?

Why was everything 'his' fault?

Chapter Text

Jason never wanted to come back from the grave.

He died a hero, covering his 'mother', who sold him out to the Joker, to the ticking bomb.

He died hearing the roaring of a batcycle coming closer. The thought that Bruce came back to save him made him relieved. Maybe he wasn't as useless as he thought? Maybe Bruce did love him? At least enough to come back for him.

But alas, he woke up in his grave for who knows why and had to dig his fucking way out with his belt and fingers.

It sure doesn't help that he became catatonic for the next two years, only to become cognizant because of Ra's toxic bathwater.

It definitely didn't help to find out that not only did Bruce not avenge him, letting the fucking clown live, but went on a 'rampage', making sure goons (not fucking rogues) were in the ICU.

Batman has one job, and he fucks it.

Not only does he not improve himself and learn his lesson, he fucking beats goons who are just trying to survive in worse living conditions and give nothing as compensation despite being a literal billionaire.

And oh-boy did Jason have a fun time asking his 'dad' to choose him or the Joker; let Jason kill the Joker, or kill Jason. He sure had a lovely time having his neck slit, watching as Batman drags the Joker out of the rubble after the explosion.

And don't get him started with him 'shooting' penguin.

Beat him to a bloody pulp, on the verge of death if not for Roy. Not only did Batman feel no remorse, but he even joked about 'kicking his ass' after Jason had literally told him that he thought Batman hated him.

What sweet love, amiright?

After everything he's experienced since coming back from the dead, Jason really just wished to disappear like smoke.

To not feel pain, just like when he was dead. He sometimes contemplates it, only stopping because Crime Alley needs him, but do they truly...?

He has no friends- they've either died, disappeared, or are doing other stuff that he doesn't want to bother them.

His family treat him like dog shit, not even. Dog shit would probably be treated better than how they're treating him. Always ready to blame him when something goes wrong.

'Oh! Someone mysteriously disappeared?' must be Jason's fault.

'Oh no! A group of people died!' It has to be Jason's fault; who else would do such a thing?

How can Jason trust them if they don't even trust him? How can Jason talk about any problems he has if their first response to anything is beating him up?

Jason is sick and tired of it all. He wants to be able to relax, joke with friends, and spend quality time with family without worrying that something will go wrong. That he doesn't need to keep his guard up.

It sure doesn't make a difference that Jason was injected with a 'failsafe' that has made living a normal life impossible. Always being overcome by fear just because of heightened adrenaline that could be caused by anything; fear (which only makes it a feedback loop), stress (which he always is and now can never not be), excitement (now he can't even be fucking excited about anything), physical exertion (which every vigilante does), food (now he can't even eat certain foods?!).

Jason sighs, it would be much better to die than live in hell where no one is ok his side, no support, nothing, and can't even function like a normal human being, always frozen due to something heightening his goddamn adrenaline.

Jason never gets what he wants. Not even his own death.

Chapter Text

It's the new year, and Jason was strapping up for patrol. After all, crime doesn't stop for holidays.

But when he went onto the streets, nothing.

No crime at all.

Weird.

There'd at least be something by now. He should ask the worker girls what they know; they know everything that happens in Crime Alley.

Just as he walks up to one, ready to ask them his question when a group of them rush to him.

"What are you doing out here, Red! It's New Year's! You should be at home celebrating!!" One says as she slaps his arm in a scolding manner.

"W-"

"Nuh-uh! No excuses, go back home, now. We don't need protecting tonight." Another says as she dangles a taser, pepper spray, and a combat knife around.

"Everyone around here's making double sure they can protect themselves and others, so you can rest at least for tonight, Hood. You deserve rest after everything you've done for us." The other worker girl says, pushing Red Hood back towards his known safehouse, one where any Crime Alley residents go to when they need urgent help.

Red Hood just sighs and grumbles before pulling his phone out and calling the Outlaws group chat.

After everyone joined the call, he grumbled how he's being 'forced' to celebrate New Year's, so they should meet up and do exactly that.

All of them agreed.

Kory was enthusiastic, overjoyed to reunite with her friends after not seeing them in so long. You could see it from the way the background shifted; she was obviously floating mid-air from happiness now.

Roy acted nonchalant, but Jason just knew that he was also excited inside, "You can bring Lian as well, Roy." Jason adds, thinking of what food to cook for all of them. Roy nods and exits the call to get Lian ready.

Artemis has a small grin, one that shows that she's looking forward to it, especially teasing Jason with whatever embarrassing stories she can remember.

And Bizarro is just bursting with energy, just like Kory, he's overjoyed at the thought of seeing all the other Outlaws and spending some quality some together.

After ending the call, Jason looks back at the worker girls, sighs, and then tells them to be safe and call him if anything bad happens that they can't deal with.

They all nod while bidding Red Hood bye and a happy New Year's while Jason starts walking ever so slightly faster to his safehouse that's stocked with food, a small smile making its way to his face at the thought of everyone again after so long.

Chapter Text

Whenever the Garzonas are brought up, always mentioning Garzonas, Jason snaps, saying, "Gloria Stanson. Gloria's case."

They brush his comment aside, continuing their conversation as if the case name isn't special.

But it is.

Not only does it dehumanise the victim, but it shifts the focus of the story. How those with diplomatic immunity can use their power to dodge any charges against them. How the system fails consistently. How a man can easily get away with a crime if they have enough money.

It removes the harm and impact the victim experienced, sometimes undermining it, and instead is remembered as just the victim. The victim's name is often forgotten, turned into just another statistic.

But by using Gloria's name, it brings more agency, making it known who exactly the victim was and what she experienced. She wasn't just a victim; she was a victim of rape by a man who could silence her and anyone else who might protest against him.

By using Gloria's name, it focuses on how society and the systems fail. How the justice system is corrupt, letting a man who did a horrendous act like rape get away due to diplomatic immunity and money.

By using Gloria's name, it reduces Felipe's notoriety, preventing him from being glorified, turned into a film to watch, as the victim is depicted inaccurately or completely different or wiped from the story.

It brings recognition to those who see the case just how fucked up society and the systems are. And from that, change can happen.

Jason has the firm belief that a case shouldn't be known by the perpetrator, but by the victim.

Chapter Text

It's always, 'We don't kill' or 'Don't do that' with Jason.

They always condemn Jason for killing. But they never consider why he kills.

All they see is a bloodthirsty murderer who kills like he's on a murder spree. A criminal.

Not that he only kills those who deserve it, those who can't be rehabilitated. To ensure that there are no future victims, because if they lived, there would be.

But the bats don't understand that. They believe in rehabilitation, but deny when it's clear that it doesn't work. They believe rogues like the fucking Joker can be rehabilitated if given another second chance.

As if he hadn't gotten second chances over and over and over again.

But when it's Jason that does something wrong? He gets no second chances. No, he's beaten down into comas for shooting a point-blank, not even fucking killing. And at a rogue no less. He gets fucking beaten up to a pulp for trying to shoot a fucking rogue, not an innocent or anything like that.

They try to force Jason to bend to Batman's morals, as if it's the right thing to do.

The thing is, is that Jason did compromise. For a few years, he made sure not to kill anyone, but all he ever saw was a rise in victimisation. Something that was diminishing when he was doing things his way.

Jason's conflicted, does he continue to compromise his everything in return for being part of the bats? Or does he go back to his old ways and make Gotham better?

He knows what he wants, but his wants are secondary.

Saving innocent lives will always be his priority; it was why he became Robin in the first place, to help people when the justice system wouldn't.

So he goes back to his old methods. But he knows that the bats wouldn't understand, wouldn't accept him killing, and thus, he cuts contact with them.

Completely.

He rewired all his tech so that not even Oracle can find or track him. He goes to safe houses that the bats haven't found. They think they've found all of his safehouses, but they haven't.

He goes back to his crime empire and takes control again. His first move was killing Black Mask.

No need for the man to live, he wouldn't have changed his ways, and this way, no child would have to go through what he did, seeing his mother overdose and die in front of him.

Jason'll make sure that Gotham is safe again. If it's the last thing he'll do.

Chapter Text

"Jason, you can't keep doing this! If you're only doing this because I didn't save you in time, I'm sorry. But killing people is wrong, even if it's the Joker." Batman says angrily at Jason in the Batcave after recapturing the rogues after they escaped Arkham for the hundredth time that week.

Jason just laughs, resigned.

"It was never about saving me in time, Bruce. I don't care that you didn't make it. I've said it a billion times, and I'll say it again." His voice laced with venom.

"What I cared about was not seeing the 'thing', because the Joker is not a person, not seeing the thing live. All I wanted was proof that you loved me, that you would choose me instead of him. There is literally no benefit to keeping him alive. All that sick thing does is take away lives or make them miserable. You don't even have to be the one to kill him. I know you wouldn't be able to. But the fact that you can't let others either? That's beyond fucked, Bruce, that's what I'm truly pissed off at. You have no right to force your morals onto me, just as I don't force mine on you. Be glad I didn't make you choose between killing me or it." He snorts, voice condescending.

Jason's voice rises, "You're a hypocrite. You know that, right? You say you want justice, but you're not doing anything to help long-term. You treat violence with more violence, and you know what violence spreads? More violence. All you're doing is contributing to the cycle that is Gotham's crime stats.

Sure, you've helped people, saved some, and so on. But what about the ones you failed? The ones you're too late to save? Like Gloria? All you do is capture the criminal and send them off to the GCPD, only for them to be released the next day. You do nothing to help those who truly need it. You don't walk down the streets of Gotham, see just how bad things are.

And you know Crime Alley? Criminals know not to do anything on the anniversary of your parents' death; they know Batman only shows up on that one specific day, but before and after that date, it's all free game. Can do whatever the fuck they want, knowing Batman would never find out, he sure hasn't before." He snides, seeing how Bruce flinches, feeling Jason even more to criticise him.

"And don't even get me started on the Joker! All you're doing is handing in a man that deserves death a hundred times over to Arkham Asylum, which is useless. And you can't tell me otherwise. It's a goddamn fucking revolving door where rogues escape the next day and create even more victims. You're doing nothing but adding to the casualties by throwing the Joker back there. And the fact you can't even let me, ME! Can't even let me kill the Joker for what he's done to me. You say I shouldn't 'dirty' my hands more than they already are, but I don't give a single fuck. I stand by the fact that the Joker needs to die, and everyone, and I mean every goddamn person in Gotham, would cheer." He sneers out.

"If you don't agree with my viewpoints, fine. But don't you fucking dare demean me for what I think is right. You don't ask the victims what they want, you don't ask them if they're okay with their perpetrator dying. I do. I ask before killing them. Sometimes I don't even ask; they straight up beg me to get rid of their nightmare, so I do. To make them feel safe, because that's what matters. Making sure innocents are and feel safe, something you never did for me. So don't you fucking dare force your fucked up morals down my throat. You can keep them for all I care. But either accept that I don't have the same morals and worldviews as you, or just cut me off entirely, I'm sick of your mixed signals..." He says, trailing off, turning around, not even waiting to hear a response from Bruce before hopping onto his motorcycle and leaving.

If he stayed any longer, Jason just knew that he'll break down completely, that's why he had to leave right then.

Chapter Text

They say you die twice.

The first being the physical death.

The second being the memories. No longer remembered by anyone.

But does a death also count if the way someone remembers the dead has become so twisted that it is no longer the same person?

Jason died a hero, covering for his birth mum from the explosion despite betrayal. He was a good person, always helping those in need. He stopped Batman from killing multiple times as well.

But after his death, every achievement, every single good deed he did vanished, erased. His story was twisted into a cautionary tale, 'don't be like Jason.' But Jason was never like that. His life story had become so twisted that he was no longer remembered for who he truly was, but for simply what he 'did'. But even then, what he did was remembered wrong.

Jason died because he wanted to save his mum, but all that everyone remembers is that he went there to go after the Joker. But he didn't even know the Joker was there...

So what is this but another form of death?

Chapter Text

Bruce, who remembers utrh movie as what happened, vs. Jason, who remembers utrh comic as what happened.

Bruce, who remembers throwing the batarangs at Jason's hand and hitting it.

Jason, who remembers the batarang being thrown at him, slicing his neck open.

-

A few years later, and Jason's back in the fam, but quite noticeable, Jason has a scar on his neck. One that is often hidden, only ever coming out to light is rare occasions.

They just assumed it was from before he came back as Red Hood, doing whatever it was he did. And so did Bruce.

After all, he hit Jason's hand, right? No way did he cause that scar. Thank God, he wouldn't know how to live with himself.

But despite this, for some reason, Jason never stayed in the same room as Bruce for a long period of time, always finding an excuse to 'leave early', as if Bruce had done something to him.

But that's not right, right? Jason is just being awkward like all teens eventually do after growing up. There's nothing wrong between them. He's done nothing wrong to Jason.

...

But Jason would like to beg to differ.

After experiencing the shit show of Bruce choosing Joker and slicing his throat, he no longer felt safe with him.

Always feeling jittery, and the need to escape increasing whenever he was in the same space as Bruce for too long, memories of that night popped up like a constant reminder.

A reminder of what Bruce did to him, the scar, is now a permanent reminder. One he sees every day, in the mirror, in his reflection, even people's eyes when he talks to them.

A very painful reminder of what his dad chose between his son and his son's killer. One he wishes wasn't true. One he can never forget. One that is so engraved into his memory that he constantly has nightmares about his dad killing him.

Chapter Text

What if, instead of the memory of Bruce taking the day off patrol to look after sick Jaybin wasn't his happiest memory? What if it was his second-happiest?

What if he fooled himself into thinking that it was his favourite, so when S'aru borrowed and then took his 'happiest' memory, it really wasn't. Locked so deep inside, even someone like Martial Manhunter may struggle to find it.

The happiest memory Jason can recall is a night before Bruce, before everything went downhill.

It was Jason's 6th birthday, and Catherine was healthy, smiling like the sun she was, as she baked a cupcake for her beloved son. Willis had gone to a store to buy their favourite ice creams and ingredients for dinner, all Jason's favourites.

Jason can remember him and his mum humming to a song, both grinning as Catherine stirred the batter.

Jason can remember when Willis came back, bags in hand, as little Jason rushed to his dad to hug him in excitement, letting go quickly to rush him inside.

He remembers sitting on his dad's shoulders as he started cooking.

He remembers when the food was ready, he rushed to set the table, just so they could eat faster.

How, after eating the delicious dinner, his mum brought out the cupcake, a strawberry shortcake cupcake.

It cost a lot, but it just showed how deeply Jason was loved by his parents. He had only mentioned once how he really liked this cake flavour after having it this one time, and since then, without fail, they would bake one for him on his birthday.

As the cupcake was being brought out, his mum lit the candle that had the number 6.

Jason can remember his mum and dad's faces as they asked him to make a wish before blowing, going straight into a family hug after doing so.

That day was truly his happiest, and nothing would change that. Sure, he was happy with Bruce, more than that, but...

This memory was just different, special, unique; there's no word to accurately describe it, but if Jason had to explain, then he'd say that he had no worries, no concerns, no bad thoughts, and was just experiencing pure happiness.

And if Jason had the chance, he would relive the most nightmarish memory a hundred times over, if only to relive that moment. That's how much it meant to him.

Chapter Text

Jason is tired.

Being treated like a ticking time bomb. Like a failure of a Robin who caused his own death.

Sure, maybe he deserved his death?

Did he?

He doesn't know...

But if everyone says it, then maybe it's true?

But what he does know is that he wasn't the 'angry' Robin. He wasn't innately full of anger. He was angry at the injustice Gothamites faced, every single goddamn day.

He remembers nearly always smiling, cracking jokes that even Batman laughed at.

He remembered sparring with Bruce one time, managing to up Bruce, how excited he was for beating Bruce after only a few months of training.

He remembered humming along a song as he did his homework, asking Bruce if he could stay up longer to do more, smiling the whole time. He loved learning. He loved going to school.

He remembered being in the library, reading book after book, so immersed in the texts that he hadn't realised it was dinner time until Bruce poked his cheek. He had jumped at this, a little scream escaping as he asked why he didn't knock. Bruce had just replied that he'd knocked quite a few times, even calling him out. Jason just blushes in embarrassment, closing the book he was reading with a bookmark in between, before plopping it onto the table to head to the dining room.

He remembered jumping with joy, explaining all the plots of the stories he read to Bruce, how Bruce would ask questions that he'd answer. He loved those moments, seeing Bruce interested in what Jason had to say.

He remembered helping Alfred bake a cake for Bruce on his birthday, seeing Bruce's teary expression when he saw the cake. Jason wished he had captured that moment on film.

He remembered when he got sick, and Bruce decided not to go on patrol, opting to watch a movie with him. It made Jason all giddy inside, knowing that Jason was more important than his mission.

But then things changed.

Bruce became more irritated with him. Not seeing how angry he was when a victim did not get the justice they deserved. Not seeing how Jason hated seeing a criminal scot-free just because they had the power to do so, unpunishable.

One time, Jason had crippled a pimp so badly that they went into shock. Bruce reprimanded him, telling him that they needed to ask the man questions, but his actions had prevented that.

It got to the point where Bruce benched him from Robin, telling him he didn't need a 'teenage rebellion', and that he wasn't Jason's 'dad'...

That just broke Jason; he thought of Bruce as his dad, did Bruce not think of him as a son? Was he just Robin to him? Is so...

He no longer had any use. He was benched from Robin, and the only reason Bruce took him in was because of Robin.

Without Robin, Jason is nothing. Without Robin, Bruce won't want him and would throw him out onto the streets.

So, when he sees that his birth mother was alive? He rushed at that opportunity, at the chance that a parent would love him.

Just like when Catherine loved him before her addiction, before Wills disappeared.

He was so happy to finally meet her; all his previous grievances from Bruce disappeared, replaced with warmth that at least someone loves him.

But he was wrong once again. Sheila had taken him straight to the Joker after he revealed he was Robin.

Handed him right over to the clown, lighting a cig as she watched the crowbar hit her son.

Jason could do nothing but endure; it was his fault for trusting Sheila, right?

It was his fault for running away.

His fault for hoping someone on this damn earth would love him.

He should've known he'd never be that lucky.

What a fool he was.

So maybe he did deserve his death, maybe he deserved to be killed again? Who knows?

But he was anything but the 'angry' Robin. Sure ,he did get angry, but it wasn't his main trait, and he had as much anger as any other Robin.

He was cheerful, lighting up any room. He was mournful, empathetic with any victim he came across. He was angry, enraged at the injustice innocents faced, how their suffering could've been prevented if only they were faster, stopping the criminal before they did anything.

Chapter Text

It was little things at first.

Jason dazing out until someone called out to him. Something that was unusual with how vigilant the man was, never putting his guard down, unless truly feeling safe.

Then, Jason wouldn't snap out of it, his eyes dazed as the bats tried to get his attention and failed. The colour of his eyes changed, albeit a little, with the glowing green dimming, the blue he originally had popping out more as hints of green swirled around.

It was concerning...

Seeing Jason, dissociate...? It felt wrong to see him like that, and they didn't know what was happening to Jason.

After the episode of Jason dissociating, they decided to ask him if anything had happened or if there was anything wrong. He just shrugged, saying he was fine. Clearl,y he was lying, but they didn't want to press harder and shoo away their brother.

But Jason knew.

He knew what was happening to him.

Could feel it.

The unholy bathwater was wearing off.

Reverting him back to his hollow self of a shell. Still functional, moving as if on autopilot, but without the mind and personality in it.

He called Talia, asking if this had happened before.

On the call, Talia sighs, "I should have told you before you left..."

"About what?"

"For individuals like you who've only been dumped in the Lazarus Pit once, the effects will wear off after some time; it varies between individuals, but you have been quite lucky to last. For those who have used it multiple times, like my father, the effects last longer."

"So, either I go back to Nanda Parbat to bath in neon green glop, or I revert back to my catatonic self?"

"Simply, yes. However, I would prefer for you to come back and stay here. That way, you do not have to keep coming back whenever this happens."

At this, Jason nods. That makes sense, makes things more efficient. However... "What about Crime Alley, though? There'd be no one to look after them if I leave."

"Leave that to me, I'll send a few of my personnel to help. You have your crime empire, correct? I'll get them to help look after Crime Alley as well, make sure nothing bad happens. I promise." Talia says softly, as she promised to Jason, a hint of motherhood in her voice.

Jason nods, a small smile on his face, "Sounds good, T."

"Now then, with that issue out of the way, I'll come get you tomorrow. Go rest up, Jason; you need some rest before leaving. Goodnight and sweet dreams." That's the last thing Talia says before ending the call.

Jason sighs, flipping back into the couch he was sitting on, resting an arm over his eyes for a second before standing up and heading to bed. Best not to disobey T. He shivers at the thought of what she'd do if she finds out he didn't rest.

Chapter Text

"Yeah, and you still haven't stopped Joker permanently." Jason shrugs after being told off for the millionth time for something he did 'wrong'.

"We don't kill Jason." Bruce grits out, anger behind his words since he's said these words so many times, and Jason still hasn't understood them.

Jason just looks at him, baffled and then scoffs, "I said stopped, not kill, there's a distinction. Sure, you don't kill, but what about shoving Joker in a place where he can't escape from? For example..." He mutters in thought and then exaggerates a fist in hand with an 'aha!' expression on his face.

"You could send him to the Phantom Zone? That way, he can't harm innocents and won't die. Win-win if you ask me. But you never will do that because you put your fucked up game before everything. Before me, you son. Before civilians who you're supposed to be protecting. From everyone. And please," Jason says mockingly,

"Don't deny that none of that isn't true, because otherwise you would've let me kill him when we had the showdown. I didn't even fucking ask you to kill him, I asked you to let me kill him. And yet..." He trails off, "You killed me. You broke your no-kill rule to kill your son instead of the homicidal maniac that killed your son and many other civilians..." As Jason said this, his voice was devoid of any emotion. As if it were a matter of fact, as if it wasn't something horrible.

"Joker is my responsibility and therefore has to stay in Arkham." That's all Bruce has to say. Go-figures. Of course, he'd ignore the part where Jason tells him that Bruce had killed him, had allowed so many civilians to die just because he wouldn't transport Joker to a more secure prison. Of course, he doesn't care what Jason has to say. Anything Jason says that goes against Bruce must be wrong; Bruce can't do wrong after all, can he?

"..." Jason sighs and then ruffles his hair, "No. I'm not doing this anymore, Bruce. I'm done." He says as he twists his body to leave.

Chapter Text

Damian is baffled by what he hears when the bats describe his Akhi.

Father, Pennywoth, and Drake describe Jason as an innately reckless, angry, and violent child who causes his own death, and to not be like him.

But they're wrong. Jason isn't reckless; he plans things to a T, making sure that everything will work in his favour.

Sure, there are times when something unexpected happens, but he's a quick thinker and will find a way to manage the problem most efficiently.

Jason isn't innately angry either; he's not just angry at the 'world' and everyone in it; he's angry at the injustice innocent face, the suffering that could've been avoided. Damian's seen Jason create a bloodbath, soaking in the blood of scum who deserve it tenfold, anger seeping out at the thought of the more victims that were created.

Nor is he innately violent, often preferring to wind down with a book or just spending quality time with Damian. That is anything but violent.

If anything, Damian would describe Jason as a kind soul, one too passionate and caring, putting others first instead of himself.

He's disgusted by Bruce and Alfred. Much to his displeasure, he can acknowledge that Drake is not entirely at fault, as he was only a child who saw the adults trample on Jason's good name.

No.

The people he is mad about are Father and Pennyworth. They're supposed to be adults, one a hero, and yet they don't have the brains to understand that no child is at fault for their death? That adults should instead protect them from any harm?

And don't even start on the memorial case. It is downright disgusting. To say that Jason was a 'good soldier' and not a son? To tarnish his name while also holding him up to a pedestal?

It truly baffles Damian as to why he was sent to live with them instead of Jason, his Akhi, the Red Hood.

Chapter Text

"Jason-- I've never hated you. Not once. Not for a moment." Jason freezes, hearing Bruce say he never hated Jason.

Bruce has never hated him? Then what would hating him be like, seeing as he sliced Jason's neck with a batarang, beat him into a goddamn coma, crashed into him with a car multiple times, and so many other things. He doesn't even do those things to the rogues he hates, so what would Bruce do if he hated him? And then Bruce continues,

"Do I think you can be an insolent bonehead? A lot of times. Do I think you need an occasional kick in the ass? I don't deny it. But at the end of the day, I've got your six. And I know you have mine."

And that- all Jason could do was give a smile, one so forced his cheeks hurt. Does Bruce consider what he did an 'occasional kick'? If putting him into a coma was an occasional kick... What else would Bruce do if Jason overstepped his lines?

How much pain will Bruce inflict on Jason the next time something similar happens? What's the limit? Will Bruce eventually kill him?

Jason didn't think he'd ever have to worry about Bruce killing him. What, with his no-kill rule.

But now?

He's not too sure...

If someone asked, he wouldn't be able to deny the possibility firmly.

If anything...

He thinks that Bruce might be the one to kill him in this life; he had already come close to it on various occasions before. Maybe he had succeeded, but Jason's body refused to stay dead.

Has Bruce killed him?

He thinks back to the showdown, Joker laughing in his arms as Jason gives Bruce his ultimatum: Joker or Jason. Let Jason kill the Joker, or Bruce kill Jason to stop him.

A hand makes its way to Jason's throat, a clear reminder of what Bruce chose. Jason lying on the concrete, bleeding out from his neck just before the explosion.

Sometimes, Jason wonders to himself if he had died that day.

Chapter Text

Jason is used to being treated badly; he deserves it after all. He's not like the bats who have a righteous moral.

He's killed people, tortured some, done many bad things (even if they deserved it)

So when someone asks if he's okay, he's surprised.

Someone actually cares about him?

No... They must be pretending, only asking out of politeness rather than actual concern.

No one cares for Jason after all, right? Not even his supposed 'family' cares about him...

They only care that he follows the rules.

Jason wonders, is it normal to think that even basic human decency is something he doesn't deserve? That no one could ever possibly care for him?

He doesn't know...

Chapter Text

When Jason died, he spent his days happy, doing whatever it was he did in the afterlife, accompanying Death and rambling to her about so many things.

But after a while, he started missing his family, his dad. He begged Death to let him see them again, and Death, who had come to love Jason as a son, could only comply with her son's wishes.

But she wasn't allowed to do it for free, so she proposed a deal.

Jason could come back to life on the condition that if his family rejected or did any harm to him, his heart would be stabbed. However, it wouldn't be fatal unless it happened multiple times; only then would Jason return to Death, never to return to the living world. But if Jason wanted to come back, all he had to do was call for her.

Jason agreed straight away, his family would never hurt him, right? So it'd be easy.

And thus Jason Todd returned from the dead, crawling his way out of his grave.

Only that, during his little escape, he didn't have enough oxygen. So when he got out of the ground, his brain had been badly damaged and thinking suddenly became much harder.

Jason knew he had to go somewhere, but he just couldn't remember where. And as he was walking...

A car crashed into him, and all the lights went off from there.

The next time Jason came too, he was underground, light illuminated by the green water beneath him, his body feeling wrong, wrong, wrong.

Turns out he was catatonic for two years. Talia had informed him of what happened during that time, after he managed to calm down from his initial panic.

But when Talia mentioned he was unavenged? That he was replaced within months of his dying? He didn't know how to react. It simply couldn't be true, right...?

After finding out more information, Jason was livid. Just how, how could Bruce do all that to him?

Jason could feel his heart being stabbed, but he ignored it.

He was going to give Bruce a chance and see if he would take it.

And thus, utrh happened, and you all know how that ended, a batarang to his throat after being beaten down by his supposed 'dad'.

During that fight, Jason did his utmost best not to show the pain he felt as his heart was stabbed and stabbed.

Jason thinks he died, or nearly died again, after the explosion, but somehow, Jason was still alive and kicking.

Time passed, and somehow, somehow, Jason went back to the bats, reintegrated into the family.

But as time went on, the number of stabs to his heart increased, each time more painful than the last. Stabs from each and every one of them in some way, the one who dealt the most stabs being Bruce, because of course it was him, who else would it be?

Jason started to think that maybe he should really just go back to death. His heart was bleeding at this point, and sometimes it felt like he couldn't even breathe, or even function like a normal person.

Death never hurt Jason, always making sure he was happy, safe. He misses her. He never should've asked to come back to a family that clearly doesn't like him...

He missed her, missed her warmth, her hugs, her reassurance.

"Death..." Jason muttered. And Death appeared shortly after, her expression one of sadness.

"My poor child, I am so sorry for what they have done to you. Do you wish to go back with me now?"

And all Jason could bring himself to do was collapse in his embrace, tears falling on his blank face.

He's just so very tired.

Death just cradles him, stroking his head in soft movements as she teleports them back to the afterlife.

"It's alright now, my son, no one will be able to hurt you again." Death says, voice containing hints of certainty.

After Jason had fallen asleep in Death's embrace, Death tucked him into a bed before disappearing to have a 'chat' with Gotham.

Gotham, who also loved Jason as a son, Gotham who would most definitely be enraged by what Jason had experienced. It is time to make sure the almighty bat regrets their every action now.

No mercy is deserved for a man who hurts his child both physically and mentally.

Chapter Text

"Ya don' get it!" A thug screams, pointing a gun at the hostage's head while holding them in a headlock.

Red Hood raises his hands, trying his best not to rile up the man further as he speaks in a slow tone, "Hey, it's okay, I do understand where you're coming fro-"

"YOU UNDERSTAND NOTHING! YOU DON'T GET WHAT IT'S LIKE HAVING TO SCRAP BY, RUNNING ERRANDS FOR THE ROGUES JUST TO SURVIVE ANOTHER DAY!!" He spats out.

"No. I do understand," Red Hood says in a firm voice, "Grew up in Crime Alley myself, had ta survive a few years homeless jacking car wheels, I know better than anyone what this kinda life is like," Red Hood could see the way the man's expression changed from anger to confusion.

"The almighty Red Hood grew up in Crime Alley?" He snorts, "As if."

Red Hood couldn't help my give a small chuckle that earned a glare from the man, "What's so funny, huh?"

"Nah- Nothin, it's just- I really did. My pa was a criminal, but only so that he could feed me and ma. Although... As ya'd prob know if ya also grew up there few years ago, there were lots'a addicts, my ma was one'a them. Got addicted after pain meds became too expensive and then died from OD."

At this, Red Hood could see the man's defences slipping, just a little bit more.

"That's why I'm currently controlling the drug trade, ya don't see as many addicts now, right? It's cause I made sure that only the best quality goes out, and never to the wrong people. I've also been employing people like ya. People just want to survive or support their family, so that they don't have to work for the other rogues and risk prison or death. And if you want, you could also work under me, but you'll have to follow the rules."

The man looks at him, contemplating, "What're ya rules?"

"No harming kids, no selling drugs to kids, no sa'ing anyone, or harrassing anyone, basically no doing bad things, and if possible help those who need it. Those are the base ones, but there little other ones that the others can tell you about once you join. We also hold weekly study sessions where I teach my gang things to help their education, and then they can teach the kids who can't go to school. Sound good?"

The man eyes him with suspicion before ultimately nodding his head, "Sounds good."

"Great, so if you could put the gun down and release the person you're holding, that'd be great." The man looks down and immediately opens his arms, letting the hostage go before putting the gun down, staring at Red Hood to see what he'd do next.

"Cool, I'll just bring him to Leslie's front door, and then we can get you employed."

The man nods as he follows Red Hood, who picks up the hostage and throws him over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes before walking towards Leslie's clinic.

"What's your name, by the way?"

"... Matt."

"Dang, we already got like three other Matts, so you'll be 4Matt, nickname Format, kay?"

Matt just snorts at how chill Red Hood's being, "Sure, that's all good with me, Boss."

Chapter Text

AU where, after dying via crowbar and explosion, Jason lingered in the living world as a ghost, seeing everything that happened after his death.

Bruce's 'grieving', where he would beat up criminals so bad they had to be hospitalised, criminals who did so much as burglary, mostly like to survive. But he did nothing about the rogues who continuously killed innocents, did nothing about the clown who killed his son, even after his diplomatic immunity disappeared.

He saw his own funeral, how only a select few attended, how Dick wasn't there.

He was angry; he thought that after so many fights between Dick and Bruce, he'd started getting close to him.

But then he saw Dick in the Cave, screaming at Bruce for not telling him that Jason had died. He saw Bruce punching Dick after Dick implied it was Bruce's fault that Jason died, and Bruce's denial, instead blaming Dick.

Jason no longer felt hurt from Dick's absence at his funeral; he now knows that he didn't even know Jason was dead until well after his funeral.

He saw Alfred put up a memorial case, one that had Jason as a soldier, not a son. Alfred discussed how Jason was a lost cause.

Bruce never defended Jason, instead erasing every good that Jason had done, taking down every picture of him, his little trails in the manor, as if he never lived there.

All Bruce talked about was how he was impulsive, reckless, angry, and violent. He used Jason as a cautionary tale, 'Don't be like Jason or you'll get yourself killed'.

But Jason was never like that, and the betrayal he felt, seeing all this unfold, hurt him so much.

Just how?

How could the two people who should've been on his side do this to him? Not anyone else, but them.

They were supposed to be his family, and family does not do this.

Maybe he wasn't part of the family, but he's almost certain that if Dick was the one to die, he'd never have been treated like this.

Jason finds that being a ghost is not fun at all. He wants to go to the afterlife now; he doesn't want to stay here anymore and see just how much worse it could get.

Chapter Text

Surprisingly, Jason is a good teacher.

With his shit temper, you'd expect him to be terrible at teaching, getting angry at his students all the time and being fed up with them.

But he wasn't.

When he teaches any of the bats, he'd walk through the topic slowly, making sure they completely understood before moving on. Would point out a perspective they would never have thought about and then let them try to answer it themselves.

The voice Jason would use was soothing, never angry; whenever they failed a question, no sarcasm or mocking in sight. He never teased them when they failed, either, instead taking them through the answer and how they should answer it next time before giving them a similar question for them to solve.

Jason would also give the bats he was teaching snacks. Ones he'd baked earlier in the day. At the start of the study session, he'd just bring in a plate of baked goods, putting it next to them as if it was nothing. It made the bats look forward to their study session, being able to eat such delicious snacks. Jason was seriously a godsend.

Not only did Jason help teach the bats, but even his gang members and the homeless kids. He would set up the warehouse like one of those mini presentations at the public library, a whiteboard with cushions in front of it. He'd hold weekly sessions, the subject on rotation as he'd write on the whiteboard to explain things, answering any questions any of them may have.

After each session, the kids would rush up to Red Hood, proudly showing off what they've learnt from him, their faces radiating joy as he pets their head and praises them.

The adults would brag to each other about how they get to teach their family what they've learnt, often giving Red Hood some kinda of present after each session as thanks, nothing too expensive though, otherwise the man in question would refuse it, and they wouldn't want that.

Chapter Text

Jason once told Bruce that you can't stop crime, that the only way is to control it.

Sure, he's back with the fam, but he still stands by his point. You can't fully stop crime, and even if it happens, there will be dire consequences.

As Durkheim once argued, crime is an inevitable and normal aspect of social life. Without crime, society would be normlessness (anomie), where societal norms and values disappear because acceptable behaviour is no longer definable. This can then lead to increased rates of depression, anxiety, and... Suicide. It can lead to an increase in deviant behaviour, create unrealistic expectations.

Crime allows for social change, where reformations can be made to develop new societal standards. Crime can also help create social cohesion, allowing communities to foster greater connection. All of which helps stabilise society as a whole.

Therefore, without crime, society would not be able to function and is, therefore, a necessity.

However, that doesn't mean that an increase in crime is okay; there should only be enough to keep the societal norms and values afloat. This is why controlling crime, so that only the bare minimum of it, is better than trying to stop crime overall.

By controlling crime, it helps make sure there are no unnecessary victims; it helps to deter potential offenders from committing any crimes, therefore reducing the rate of offending; it helps civilians feel safe; it removes those who are a threat to society, and potentially helps them to be rehabilitated.

This is why Jason believes that you can't stop crime, but you sure as hell can control it.

Chapter Text

Sometimes...

Sometimes Jason will wonder to himself, 'When was the last time Bruce considered me his son? If he even did.' he scoffs to himself at his thoughts.

This thought popped up during one of his quiet moments, not engulfed in fear due to his adrenaline spiking. Just how the fuck could Bruce do this to him? He says he wishes Jason a normal life and then completely fucks it up.

So there's him being injected by Bruce's failsafe, essentially fucking him up so badly he can barely function like a normal living being.

Then there was that time Bruce asked him to do a mission together, only to deceive him and take him to his most traumatic place, the warehouse in Ethiopia. And by Heaven and Earth, the man dared to ask his 'son' to recall his death to see if it would be of any use to bring Damian back without making sure Jason was okay? Like sure, if he'd just fucking asked, he'd do it straight away, but no. Bruce had to fucking deceive him instead.

There was also that time when he was working for the Task Force Z, and Bruce (and the other bats) ran him over and beat him up a couple of times. What father runs his own child over?

Then there was the whole Penguin shit. Beating Jason so badly that he was in a coma. And Bruce had no regrets about it. Jason wonders if Bruce would've actually killed him if Roy hadn't saved him.

And don't even get started on the shitty showdown between him and Bruce. He had given Bruce an ultimatum: his son, or his son's killer. And the fact that he chose his son's killer? The fact that he slit his son's throat with a batarang? It had to be intentional, after all, Bruce's first few lessons are literally about how you should only throw a batarang if you know where it's going to land.

Okayyy... So maybe Bruce had never considered Jason his son after coming back from the grave, but what about before?

He thinks about the time just before running off to Ethiopia, how Bruce had told him he didn't need a 'teenage rebellion' and that he wasn't Jason's dad. Huh. Maybe that was when Bruce stopped considering Jason his son?

Hmm...

Jason looks back to an earlier time. Gloria's case. Bruce's accusation, 'Did he fall? Or did you push him?' Maybe it was this moment right here? When Bruce didn't trust Jason enough to know he wouldn't push a man to his death.

Sure, he wanted the man to die and 'spooked' him enough that he fell, but he never physically touched the man to push him. And the fact that Bruce immediately assumed the worst of Jason without any evidence? Maybe that moment was truly when Bruce no longer thought of him as his son.

Jason could only laugh to himself at this revelation, so it wasn't because Jason came back wrong. It was way before that, back when he was still Robin, believing that Robin was magic and that Batman was one of the greatest heroes.

Chapter Text

All the heroes see Red Hood as a rogue, a killer, a psychopath. But they forgot a crucial fact, that Red Hood was only 20 years old. Two years since he started his murder spree, at the ripe age of 18.

They forget that an 18-year-old isn't even an adult. That a teenager was doing such horrendous things at such a young age, and the only thing they think to do is condemn and blame him? Do they not think about the whys? Why Jaso- Red Hood did such things? What his goal truly was?

What heroes they are. Not doing anything to help Red Hood, when it's so clear that he's just a traumatised boy screaming for help in the only way he knows how. The worst offenders are the bats, especially Batman, with how he treats his own son as a criminal, beating him worse than the rogues who have murdered countless innocent lives.

And an even more horrifying fact was that Jason was catatonic for two years, making his mental age even younger than his physical body. So really, he was a 16-year-old when he decapitated eight heads. But no one knew if that fact did they? Therefore, it doesn't matter; all they care about is 'what' Red Hood did, and not 'why' he did it...

Chapter Text

"Why does everyone come to me when they need someone to picklock a door?" Jason grumbles.

"Really? You don't know why?" Duke says mockingly, standing beside Jason, who's currently kneeling to pick a lock.

"Excuse me, young man, but I don't appreciate your attitude." Jason says in an annoyed voice, turning to face Duke and pointing at him, "I've never done anything remotely illegal in my life." He says as he raises a hand to his chest dramatically as if in offence.

"Uh-huh, in this one or the last one?" Duke asks smugly.

"Both, pre- and post-resurrection and in death, I swear I have never done anything illegal," Jason says, hand over chest, the other raised in the air as he sarcastically swears on his name that he's never done anything illegal before.

Duke just snorts at that, "Sure, Mr. I-became-a-crime-lord-just-to-fuck-with-Bruce."

"And it worked," Jason says, shrugging smugly, finally opening the door.

"So this is where the Intel for your case is?"

"Yup", Duke says, "Should be around here, somewhere..." He says, trailing off as he begins looking around the room.

"This what you're looking for?" Jason asks, handing a file up.

"It is, thanks man", Duke says with a smile on his face, reaching for the file from Jason, but Jason just holds it out of reach, "Ah ah ah- what do you say?" Jason says, teasing Duke.

Duke just groans, rolls his eyes and then says, "Wowe- Thank you so much for your help, Red Hood, would've never been able to do this without your incredible skills." He says deadpan as he holds his hand out, waiting for the file to 'miraculously' fall into his hand.

And within the next second, Jason plops it into Duke's hand, "No probs man, anytime." He says playfully, "Now let's go back to the cave, hm?"

Duke just sighs, "Has anyone ever told you that you're incredibly dramatic?"

"Dramatic? Me? Never." Jason responds sarcastically as he lifts his arm and places the back of his hand to his forehead, "Oh woe is me, how could you ever think of such things? If anything, I'm the least dramatic in this family."

Duke just side-eyes Jason before scoffing, "Yeah right."

Jason sighs, "No one appreciates me around here." He says sardonically.

Chapter Text

It started at some point. Jason would sacrifice himself whenever any of the other bats were at risk of injury.

A knife from behind? Jason will push whichever bat it is to the side and get stabbed.

A gun pointed at one of them? Jason rushes to be shot instead.

It was worrying the bats. Why wasn't Jason looking after himself? Throwing himself into danger when it could clearly be avoided?

They demanded answers from Jason, some telling him not to do something so rash, a few demeaning him for his recklessness.

All Jason did was roll his eyes and state that "it would be better for me to be hit than the others."

Bruce looks at him with narrowed eyes, "Why would it be better for you to get hit?" his voice sounds annoyed that his son can't stop getting injured.

"..." Jason hesitates to answer, but when he does, it's with uncertainty, "Because everyone would mourn for the others?"

At this, Dick snaps his head around, "What do you mean by that Jason?"

"It means that it's better to see everyone else alive and well, duh." He shrugs, as if it were common sense.

Dick narrows his eyes, "At the cost of you?"

Jason just looks at him a little confused by Dick's reaction, "I mean yea? At least you guys would be safe that way?"

"Jay, Jason, listen," Dick says, grabbing Jason's shoulders to make sure Jason was looking at him.

"You don't need to sacrifice yourself for us. We've lost you once, and we don't want to experience that again. Your life is more important to us than any one of us being badly hurt, understand?"

Jason just looks at Dick, looking even more confused than before, as if what Dick said to him was complete nonsense.

"Uhhh.... Okay...?" He lifts his hand to shake Dick off, getting ready to leave, feeling uncomfortable with everyone's staring, "Can I go now, or-"

Damian steps in front of him, arms crossed, "tt, you are going to the infirmary and getting your injuries checked." He said firmly, no refusal possible.

Jason just sighs and ruffles his hair. There's no escaping, especially when Damian gets like this, "Fine..." He says with a grumble as he starts walking towards the infirmary, "Just hurry up."

The bats look at Jason with narrowed eyes, trying to see if Jason really understood how important he was to this family before splitting up to do their own thing, Damian following behind to make sure Jason gets checked over properly.

Chapter Text

"What's the matter? Lost for words?" The Arkham Knight says, pointing his gun towards Batman after raising his helmet to show his face, revealing that the man who was helping Scarecrow terrorise Gotham was Bruce's thought-to-be-dead son, Jason Todd.

"I expected more... I'm hurt." He says mockingly in a deadpan voice.

"Joker sent me the film... I- I saw him kill you Jason." Is all Batman managed to say. But perhaps that was the wrong thing to say as Jason screams at him.

"Don't you dare lie to me! How long did you take before replacing me? Huh? A month? A week? I trusted you, and you just left me to die!" Bruce could feel his teeth grinding to the point of hurting. His hands curled into fists, clenching so hard his knuckles were white.

"That's not what happened!" Bruce retorted in an angered tone. He couldn't believe what Jason was saying. He searched days on end trying to find him, only to find nothing...

"Lies and slander, as always Bruce! I saw the newspapers! I saw the 'new' Robin out there, not even a week after I was gone! You could've easily found me if you looked hard enough. I was right there, in Arkham, for a year, A YEAR!" He yells out in anger, "With the fucking psychotic clown that you refuse to do anything but put in the revolving door that is Arkham Asylum." He seethes, venom coating his words.

"You know? You always told me, 'focus on what I want to achieve, and it will happen.' " Jason reminisces as he starts walking towards Bruce. Bruce, who just stood there, staring at him. "Well, do you know what I want right now? I... want... you... dead." The gun Jason was holding made its way underneath Bruce's head. So close to killing Bruce right then and there, and the way Jason spoke with so much hatred filled Bruce with anguish.

Bruce had to do something quick to de-escalate the situation. So when he spotted an opening, he swats Jason's hand away and headbutts him before grappling out of sight.

Jason staggers backwards, but then he pulls out two pistols and starts shooting at Batman.

"You can't hide from me! I will hunt you down!" He screams, merging his two pistols into a sniper rifle before ripping the top layer of his helmet to reveal a red layer underneath and then lowering it. The Arkham Knight then grapples to a vantage point, waiting for Batman to come into sight so he can shoot the man down.

The Arkham Knight can play the waiting game; as long as he kills Batman, he can wait forever.

Chapter Text

For those who knew Jason before he died, they knew that Jason's hair was curly, downright fluffy to the touch. It was the cutest thing they've ever seen, especially when they pat his head, seeing Jason relax into it like a cat, with a smile on his face.

For those who knew Jason after he died, they know that Jason's hair is straight, not a curl in sight. So during a chase for a loose magician, Jason is de-aged, back to before he died, back to when his hair was still curly and full of life.

All the newer bats who only knew Jason from after his death were shocked, because who the ever flying fuck was this?!

Ain't no way Jason had such fluffy hair! How the hell did it go from this to his current straight hair? They seriously need Jason to bring back the curls, maybe even for- persuade making him curl his hair, because if this wasn't the cutest thing even in addition to his grin that's as bright as the sun, they don't know what is.

All of them were fascinated by how fluffy his hair looked, asking him if it was okay to pet his head. Much to their surprise, Jason was happy to agree, leaning in to their touch, a small chuckle escaping his lips.

Even Damian, the ever-so-serious kid, couldn't resist. One touch of Jason's hair and you could hear the gears turning, Damian just 'tt' as he continues to stroke Jason's hair like he would Alfred the cat. The hint of red in Damian's ears couldn't hide his enjoyment, or embarrassment of enjoying this moment.

Bruce only smiled from a distance, seeing his kids smother Jason with love, reminiscing about the times when Jason would sleep, leaning on his shoulder, and Bruce would ever so gently caress Jason's hair, ever so gently as to not wake him up.

Chapter Text

Instead of using crowbars as his primary weapon, Jason uses a pan.

A gooddamn frying pan.

One whack of the thing to your head and you can bet the receiver is down for the count, especially with how hard Jason could swing the thing.

It's honestly a comedic sight, seeing the almighty Red Hood just beating up goons or rogues or whatever using a pan compared to all the other bats who use literal weapons (i.e escrima sticks, bo staff, a sword, and so on).

And don't get Jason wrong, he was gonna use crowbars after putting the guns down to 'face his fears' and whatnot, it's just...

One time, he had gotten ambushed, and he grabbed the nearest thing he could grab, which was, unfortunately or fortunately, a frying pan. And just, the way all his attackers went down after one hit was way too funny for some reason that he just kept using it. It was surprisingly good as a long-distance weapon as well.

This was much to the dismay of the bats, since getting hit on the head with a frying pan can be quite dangerous and life-threatening, but all Jason says in response is that they should be glad he's at least not using guns anymore with a smug look ok his face.

Plus, Jason's only resorted to using the frying pan for those whom he thinks are irredeemable scum of the earth, using his fists or anything else for criminals who only commit crimes to survive.

Chapter Text

"Do you ever regret trying to kill me in the Titan's Tower?" Tim asks Jason one night when the two were patrolling together.

Jason stares at Tim in disbelief, "You do know the reason I attacked you in the Titan's Tower wasn't to kill you, right?" He says as if Tim was stupid for ever thinking otherwise.

Tim just narrows his eyes, "Oh? Then why?"

Jason grins sarcastically, "To teach Daddy Bat a lesson. What happens when you let kids join your crusade in a war. Also, to teach you a lesson. To show you what you were getting into, you do realise the risk of being Robin, right? I did died in that costume after all, no one. And I mean no one should've put it back on for any reason. I don't care if you only did it to help Bruce or anything else. You could've made up a new name for God's sake. So no, I don't really regret my actions, sure, I feel somewhat sorry for hurting you, but I still stand by my points."

Tim wanted to refuse, saying he knew the risks and that there was no choice but to don Robin at that time, but the words wouldn't come out.

"Anyways, the reason why I didn't ask to kill you was so you and Bruce understood the risks of a child going out, parading as a hero, and you learning that lesson requires you to be alive. Also, the fact that Bruce would've hunted me down for killing you, not that I wouldn't be able to deal with him," Jason shrugs, "But it would put a hinderance to my plans." He says flatly.

"So don't ever talk about that incident as if I was going to kill you. Because I wasn't. I even made sure your teammates would come and help you after I left. If I really wanted to kill you, I would've, and you'd be dead right now. My goal was to torture you, so you know exactly what you were getting yourself into, especially in a place like Gotham, where psychopaths and rogues are a common sight."

And then Jason, deciding he's had enough being friendly with the bats, grapples away, most likely to check on Crime Alley, leaving Tim alone with his thoughts.

Chapter Text

"I know I failed you... But I tried to save you Jason... I'm... Trying to save you now..." Bruce says exasperated.

Jason scoffs, "Save me? You're the one who made me like this? Put me in green scaly pants and made me fight crime. You reintroduced violence into a child who grew up with crime instead of letting me live a normal life after growing up clearly in a bad environment. What did you think would happen? That I'd turn out like Dick Grayson, your golden boy?" He spits out his venom.

"News flash, I'm not fucking Dick and the same method won't have the same results! I became Robin to help others, Dick became Robin because his parents were murdered, and you thought you could help him overcome it. Congrats, it worked! But for me? My parents weren't straight-up murdered like yours or Dick's; mine died because of the fucked up system! Of course, the same methods wouldn't work!!!" Jason starts yelling, swinging his arms out, "And don't even get me started on the fact that you even got a child to join your crusade, that was your first mistake. The second was making me Robin. Although I don't regret becoming Robin because I got to help people, it's because I was Robin that I died." Jason is panting by the end of his sentences, anger pouring out of his eyes, directed at Bruce, who's supposed to be the 'greatest detective on earth' and yet can't fathom how Jason ended up like this.

Bruce just looks at Jason, his expression stony in place whenever emotions are brought up, "That doesn't mean you can commit crimes and kill people!" That's all Bruce managed to say, his hands clenching into fists.

"Ha- you still don't get it, do you? There is no 'saving' me, it's called helping, I need help, not saving. Something your logical brain wouldn't be able to comprehend. I need proof that I matter more to you than your fucking moral code. Proof that I mattered to you, that you loved me as your son... But now I see... I was never your son, was I? I was just a soldier to you, someone expendable- someone you can replace. Sure, you 'grieved' but only because one of your soldiers died, right?" Jason says in a mocking tone.

"NO-" Bruce yells, "GOD NO- You were my son Jason..."

"Oh, so I 'was' your son? Then why didn't you do anything about Joker? Doing nothing but shoving him back in the revolving door? You didn't even have to kill him! Just making sure he would be able to escape from wherever you put him, making sure no one else was a victim of that clown after killing your son would've been enough! Is that too much to ask for? And what about now? Am I no longer your son? Too much of a killer for you?"

"..." Bruce says nothing, just narrowing his eyes before speaking again, "We don't kill." He says firmly.

"Yeah, I know, and? I'm not asking you to kill anyone, just acknowledge that I do, to make sure no victim has to fear being hurt again, because it will happen again. And if you can't accept that, just say it now."

Bruce says nothing as Jason stares at him for a few minutes before sighing, "Guess that's your answer, huh? Fine then." Jason turns around and starts to walk away before stopping, turning his head back to Bruce, "But don't expect to be welcomed in Crime Alley." And with that, he turns back and continues walking before grappling away.

Chapter Text

Jason has and never will like Tim Drake.

Not only did he replace him, but he also essentially stole Jason's whole life.

Tim got to form his own team; Jason never did.

Tim replaced Jason's role as Bruce's son.

Tim replaced Jason's role as Dick's brother.

Tim replaced Jason as Robin and erased Jason's legacy as Robin.

Tim started the victim-blaming of Jason's death. Helped in reducing Jason's image to nothing but a 'reckless', 'impulsive' and 'violent' Robin.

Tim stole Red Robin, a suit made by an alternative reality Bruce, for Jason.

All Jason can see is an upgrade who stole what could've been his if he hadn't died.

Tim comes from a rich background.

Tim doesn't have the trauma Jason does.

So no, he does not like Tim at all. , and never will. He feels no remorse for attacking him at the Titan's Tower. Sure, the other bats may demean him for it, or other heroes or sidekicks may blame him for doing such a 'horrendous' thing for trying to 'kill' the kid.

It's just hilarious because Jason was never going to kill him.

Torture? Yes.

But not kill, if he really wanted to kill Tim, he'd already be dead.

And not to mention that Jason himself is only what, 2 years older than Tim? And yet everyone treats him as a bad guy. Treats him as an adult, despite knowing that he's full of trauma, way more than Timothy fucking Drake. And yet they decide to coddle him? As if he's some kind of glass figure?

It's absolutely hysterical to Jason how hypocritical everyone is, saying that he should feel 'remorse' or feel 'bad' to Tim for treating him badly or 'traumatising' him.

Then what about Jason, huh? Is he not traumatised? Ya'know, after being beaten by a clown. To dying in an explosion. To digging yourself out of your own fuckijg grave. To walking around catatonic (for 2 fucking years!). To finding out your father not only didn't avenge you, but had also replaced you in every way possible (as a son, and as Robin) with an upgrade not even a month after his death. To training with LOA associates (with no good parental figures to help him with his trauma). To having a showdown with Batman to see if Bruce truly loved him, only to have his neck bleeding out by the man he thought of as his father, and so many more traumatic experiences.

So why should he ever like or feel sorry for Tim? There is no reason for Jason to.

Chapter Text

"You know Bruce... I've never blamed you for my death. The whole point of the ultimatum I have you was for you to prove that I mattered to you more than your rules or morals. That you'd be willing to make me feel safe. Because I'll never feel safe, knowing the Joker's alive. And please, don't tell me that I'm safe. There's a difference between being safe and feeling safe." Jason says flatly, sounding a little resigned.

"You can't tell me I can feel safe knowing that my murderer, who's killed not only killed or injured countless civilians, but also friends and family. The Joker escapes Arkham a thousand times every other day Iike it's a game. You can't convince me that Gotham could ever possibly be safe with that man still in Gotham. Not with him still alive and getting ready for his next show that'll have thoughts of injured and dead civilians." Jason could see the way Bruce clenched his fists so tight they were shaking a little. The man was definitely trying to figure out what to say next, but Jason wasn't finished.

"You didn't even have to kill the Joker. Just make it so he could harm others, imprisoning him in the Phantom Zone, for example. And don't you dare say that Joker is your responsibility, or that he can be rehabilitated. If he really could, wouldn't he have changed by now? With the number of chances you've given him? All you're doing is endangering civilians, parading around saying you'll deliver justice when in reality... You're doing the opposite. You're helping the cycle of violence by allowing Joker to stay in a place he can easily escape from."

"Killing is wrong!" Is all Bruce can say, apparently missing half of Jason's words.

Jason just scoffs, "You think I don't know that? I know killing is wrong. But you gotta do what you gotta do if nothing else works. If the only way to stop them permanently is to kill them, then so be it. Because rehabilitating them isn't the most important thing, keeping civilians safe is and should be. And making sure civilians feel safe is as important as making them safe. And sometimes... For them to feel safe, they need rogues or criminals to die, especially for victims..." He trails off, obviously remembering something, and if Bruce had to guess, it was either himself or the Garzonas' case. Most likely, Garzonas' case, where Gloria committed suicide because she couldn't bear the thought of Felipe being a free man who could sexually assault her any time he wanted without any repercussions.

But still, Bruce stood there like a stone, unable to say anything. Not because he couldn't, but because he didn't know what to say, how to respond. He knows that saying 'We aren't judge, jury, or executioner!' would trigger Jason even more, but how else could he respond if not that? Using victims or future victims doesn't give Jason the right to kill others who still have a chance of changing!

Jason just stares at Bruce, eyes narrow before deciding something, "You really don't care about victims as much as you say you do, do you? You prioritise punishing criminals and bringing them in rather than the traumatic situations the victim went through, making sure they get the justice they deserve... If you really cared about victims, you'd put them first before all else. But I guess even your own son's death wasn't enough to change that, so why bother with random civilians you don't know?" Jason looks right at Bruce's eyes, "Since it's quite clear where our differences are, I won't actively be helping you anymore, Bruce. I just can't- you have to realize that killing people isn't the worst thing a person can do, that living in fear everyday, waiting for your perpetrator to attack you again isn't okay, and since you can't compromise your no-kill rule to even letting me kill, all it's doing is perpetuating crime, crime that I could've prevented if I pulled the trigger. And if you can't understand that, then even if I wish to come back to this family... I can't. Not at the risk of people's lives, knowing damn well I could've prevented them from suffering..." Jason turns around and walks away from Bruce, grappling as he reaches the edge of the building.

Chapter Text

"Dear Lord... Is that truly you, Master Jason?" Alfred, the ever loyal butler, says in disbelief.

"What's wrong, Alfred?" Despite the voice modulator, Alfred could still hear the smugness in Jason's voice, "Didn't expect the street rat to come back after getting himself kidnapped?"

"You know... The things you've said about me really aren't kind." He sighs as if disappointed, "Like seriously, you just had to say, 'That boy... There is just something not right.' or, 'The lad was determined to disobey you.' " he scoffs, "Like, wowe, I thought you were a good grandparent, but I guess I was nothing but an annoyance to you? Don't even get me started on the memorial case. I know it was you who put it up. I watched the footage, and dear me," Jason sighs again, closing his eyes, leaning his face in his palm disappointedly, "You wouldn't believe the shock I went through seeing that. So please, don't pretend to be surprised that I hate you." He says deadpan, raising his hand to Alfred, who had a gun in it, pointing straight at Alfred's forehead.

"Master Jason!" Alfred gasps, "You should know better than this!" He says aghast.

Jason just snorts, "I'm not going to prolong this any longer and risk dear Brucie getting in the way. Goodbye Alfred." He says as if melancholic, as if he wasn't about to kill the man he used to be so close to once upon a time.

And then Jason pulls the trigger.

It hits right in the middle of Alfred's forehead, and the man falls backwards onto the ground.

Just as Alfred's lifeless body collapses onto the floor, Batman rushes in, looking back and forth between Red Hood and Alfred's slowly cooling body, blood seeping out onto the carpet.

"What. Have. You. Done!?" Batman snarls out, getting into a defensive position to block any attempt Red Hood may have.

"Oh, look- Batman is too late to save someone he cares about again! Never on time, are you?" He mocks the man across from him.

"Who are you? Why did you do this?!" Batman yells out.

Red Hood just snorts in disbelief, "The greatest detective still hasn't figured it out?" He says teasingly.

"Figured what out?" Batman says suspiciously, eyes narrowed, staring at Red Hood's relaxed body, not at all feeling threatened.

Red Hood once again sighs and shakes his head, shrugging, "Should've known better, well... Let me show you who I truly am," and then Red Hood raises his hand to the back of his helmet, pressing something before taking it off.

When Batman saw the face underneath, he froze. Although the hair was different, now straight with a patch of white at the front, he would always be able to recognise his son, his dead son who died at the ripe age of 15, never to see adulthood. Standing in front of him, a smirk plastered on his face, "Oh God..."

"No. Wanna guess again?"

"Jason."

Jason's smirk grows even wider, "Yes."

"What's wrong, old man? Too shocked for words?"

"But I saw you die!" Bruce snaps back, growing ever more defensive, preparing himself to attack Jason at any sign of movement.

"Well, obviously Death didn't like me, seeing as I'm here right now. And I'm hurt, how could you ever try to fight me?" Jason says sarcastically, placing a hand to his chest in an offended gesture.

"You killed Alfred, WHY?!!"

Jason just grins, "You really want to know why? I'll tell you why, it's because he badmouthed me, tarnished my name, put up a memorial case, using the word 'soldier' ok the plaque instead of 'son', so really, tell me why I shouldn't have killed him? Also, he's not the one solely to blame either." He tilts his head to the side, thumming his finger on the side of his face, looking upwards as if trying to remember something.

"You yourself had partaken in tarnishing my name, trampling on it, reducing it to nothing but a cautionary tale, someone 'not' to be, but I was never like that Bruce. So please, tell me who you were describing? Because it really wasn't who I was. Oh-! And don't even get me started on Tim! Sure, he's victim-blamed me for my own death, but he was a child. You or Alfred should've corrected him, but no. You reinforced that thought. So, although I don't find him fully at fault, I still blame him for what he's said about me. Anyways, enough about me, time for you," he points his gun towards Bruce, " to go as well."

Bruce glares at Jason as the first shot fires, he ducks below, grabbing a batarang and throwing it towards Jason's hand. It hits, and the gun falls.

This only enraged Jason as he grabbed daggers from behind, throwing a few towards Bruce as he shortened the distance. Bruce tried to kick, but it didn't hit. If anything, Bruce's leg was now caught between Jason's arms.

Jason quickly snatched a gun out and shot Bruce's leg, making sure it hit the knee joint.

Bruce screamed in pain despite trying to hold it out; this only made Jason grin, humming along a song that Catherine had once sung to him to make the little boy sleep. Humming that song always allowed Jason to focus, helping him stay sharp and conscious of what's going on. He lets go of Bruce's leg as he blocks a blow from Bruce's fist, grabbing it and then twisting it behind the older man's back, "Ah ah ah~ none of that old man." Jason says lightly, raising his free hand that holds a gun to the side of Bruce's head.

"It's time to go bye-bye Bruce. Say hi to Alfred for me, won't you?" And before Bruce could do anything, a gunshot was fired straight through his brain, and just to be sure, Jason continued shooting at every weak point in the Batsuit, to make sure Bruce wouldn't be able to get up again.

Dropping the now completely dead body, Jason huffs, dusting his hands off, as he had just done a job well done.

"Now then, two done, Joker to go." He says lightheartedly, as if he hadn't just killed two people he used to be close with, viewing them as his parents' figures.

Chapter Text

Jason, who used to have the same eye colour as Catherine, despite not being biologically related.

Jason, who missed his mum after her death, tried to find something similar after finding out that his biological mother was alive.

Jason, who died, betrayed and sold out by his mother. Only to come back from his grave and dunked in the unholy mountain dew.

Jason, whose eyes were no longer blue like Catherine's, no. They were bright neon green... Just like the Lazarus Pit.

Jason hated it. The one thing that was similar to Catherine, his mum, was gone. Forever, never to be seen again. And he hated it, so very much...

It made looking in mirrors unbearable, seeing how much he had changed, not just getting older, or how his face was marred with scars he had received during the period he trained with league associates. He no longer looked like the boy who had his mum's eyes, her smile, her traits... All of it, gone.

He's no longer able smile like her, forgotten by time, twisted by years of traumatic experiences. He tried, but he just couldn't get it right anymore.

When he first tried, he broke down, not for the first time, and definitely not for the last...

All Jason wants is to see his mum again, hug her in an embrace, and get rid of the green tainting his original blue. Jason just wanted at least one reminder that Catherine was his mum, and no one else but her.

Because, even if at the end of her life, she died to addiction, she still loved and cared for him whenever she was livid enough to.

And that was and always will be enough for Jason.

Sometimes... Sometimes Jason thinks about whether he'd meet his mum if he died, meet up in Heaven.

But he knows... He's done too many bad things to go there, and his mum would never be sent to Hell. If there was one thing he knew, it would be that.

So at the end of the day, Jason would lie awake at night, dearly wishing he could go back in time, just to see his mum one more time and cry in her arms as she comforts him, telling Jason that he did the right thing as she caresses his head gently, singing the song she always would to help Jason sleep at night.

Chapter Text

Batman is someone who you would think prioritises saving civilians and helping Gotham become safer over everything else, but that's far from the truth.

He prioritises punishing criminals or making sure the bats follow his rules. Sure, one might say that's false, but let's look at some examples, hm?

Exhibit A: the Joker.

No explanation needed. The Joker is a sick joke of a man who feels no remorse for the heinous crimes he's committed. He is by no means mentally ill, and in fact, perfectly knows what he is doing. And instead of finding a way to make sure he can't commit any crimes, Batman throws him back into the revolving door known as Arkham after the Joker has killed at least a hundred civilians, only to escape a few days later.

By not finding a more permanent or secure way of stopping the Joker, not only is Batman failing to keep Gothamites safe, but he is actually putting them at risk of becoming future Joker victims.

Exhibit B: Jason Todd, Bruce's adopted son, who died as a teenager, only to be resurrected from the dead and become the criminal, Red Hood.

Sure, Jason reformed himself, no longer killing people or terrorising the bats, but in one case, Jason had shot a blank at Penguin, resulting in Batman flipping the fuck out and pulverising Jason so badly that he was in a coma for months. It didn't matter that Jason shot a rogue or that it was a blank.

Oh no, all that mattered was that Jason broke Batman's rules; therefore, he had to be punished. Punished so badly that Batman nearly broke his no-kill rule, only avoiding that because Jason's teammate Arsenal intervened.

So really, what is Batman doing? Because it sure isn't helping Gotham. Sure, he stops crime here and there, but it should be common sense that violence = more violence. His parading around as a bat only helps Gotham short-term, not long-term. Plus, it's known that Batman doesn't kill, so why be afraid of him?

That's why he should be finding a long-term solution.

For example, Crime Alley. Batman only goes to this place once a year to mourn his dead parents. Crime Alley knows this, so they don't commit any crimes on that specific day, but every other day? It's all free game. This could've been prevented if Batman or any of the other bats regularly checked on Crime Alley. Or, if they gave more jobs to people from there, they mostly commit crimes for survival after all.

Even giving free education to them would be good, because they don't have it, but by educating them, their chances of employment will be higher. There are so many other ways of reducing crime, but the main focus of that should be targeting the root cause of crime.

Because that's the only way to make sure no future victims are created. Because what matters is preventing civilians from being victimised. So by tackling the root cause of crime, not only do you help prevent people from being victimised, but also from committing crime in the first place.

That is what should be important. Beating up criminals and rehabilitating them should come second, and only if they're willing to change, but some don't and never will, and no amount of mercy will change that.

Chapter Text

Jason never thought that his mum died because she liked her drugs more than him.

It's more of the fact that there was no support for her to quit. Sure, she had a kid to look after, but even then, that most likely pressured her even more, making her take even more drugs.

And willpower alone isn't always enough... Drugs chemically and biologically change how your brain works. It's why addiction is so hard to overcome for many.

She was fighting a losing battle, and she lasted as long as she did because Jason was by her side.

That's why Jason doesn't blame his mum for overdosing, or thinks his mum liked drugs more than him, because it wasn't about liking it, but a necessity brought upon by biological changes to her body, making her crave it.

Chapter Text

Jason being de-aged to not his years as Robin, or as his years being catatonic.

No.

He de-aged to when he was fresh from the pit, told about how Bruce never avenged him, and instead, had simply locked the clown in Arkham while getting himself a new and improved Robin.

When Jason awoke after being de-aged, he looked around, confused, before noticing the people, or rather, bats, around him. He saw Bruce, and by God, did the urge to just outright kill him surface, but Jason's better than that.

He knows that he wouldn't be able to do it just yet with all these bats... Around. So he plays along, simply asking what happened as if he wasn't filled with murderous intent towards Bruce.

-

At first, the bats were unsure of how to act around Jason, but Jason acted like 'normal', as if nothing happened, acting friendly with the bats.

Right now, Jason's playing the long game, making everyone's guards lower before striking when they least expect it.

So he makes sure that none of them realise his true intentions, that he plans to kill Bruce, he plays the role of a loving brother and son.

Sure, future him may be on friendly terms with the bats and Batman, but current him? As if.

Not in a million years.

Jason doesn't give a fuck. He will kill Bruce, and he'll make sure of it.

Chapter Text

Jason is tired.

He just wants to die.

To be put to rest.

He never should've woken up.

He should've stayed dead, unable to feel any more pain.

But he wakes up, clawing his way from the burning green water, the last thing he remembered was digging his way up from his grave. After finding out about everything that's happened since his death, he learns every deadly skill, making him undefeatable.

-

He goes back to Gotham, cleaning up the streets.

The criminals beyond redemption are dead, killed by yours truly. He's running Bruce around in circles; what else is he but thriving?

He knows how to make their deaths as painful as possible, cause he knows a thing or two when it comes to being killed.

This way, when he tells the victims of these criminals, they'll feel safe knowing not only are they safe, but that they didn't go out peacefully, that they got the retribution they deserved.

-

He never wanted to feel pain again. Not after dying in an explosion. Not after having to dig his way out of his grave.

But Jason is anything but lucky. After confronting Bruce, he gets his neck slit. He knows he died right then and there. He knows what death feels like after all.

It appears that Jason is one massive misfortune charm, with how much pain he goes through again and again and again.

-

After that night, Jason started to get nightmares. It starts with good'ol Joker, coming after him. But then Bruce joined in, and then Alfred, and then more and more joined in. Coming for him, smiling with glee.

He tries hiding, but it doesn't work. They always find him.

-

Jason starts becoming more reckless after finding out that he can't die.

One example is when he was in a warehouse doing usual vigilante shit, but he spots a bomb, with a minute left. He starts running, about to take a blow, and just as he jumps out, the warehouse explodes behind him, and Jason was smiling. Adrenaline pumping.

(Jason had a mental breakdown once he got back to one of his safehouses)

-

Jason finds himself awake the next day, walking past a mirror, seeing just how painful everything is, fighting, breathing, living. He doesn't want it to continue happening again and again and again.

And yet each and every time, Jason will go back to Bruce. No matter what Bruce does to him.

Chapter Text

For some reason, Jason can't escape the Batfamily.

For some reason, he's always running back, no matter what he experiences.

He doesn't understand why.

He wants to leave; he knows it's toxic. But for some reason, he can't.

He knows he should cut ties with Bruce, and yet he finds himself defending the man despite how abusive he's become. Despite the man nearly killing him again and again, as if on repeat.

Jason is stuck and can't escape, not even when he tries so desperately.

Chapter Text

The sound of a gun makes Tim flinch, knowing who is behind the gun that nearly shot him.

The man who's been plaguing his dreams, the man who tried to kill him not that long ago.

Tim wouldn't be able to deny that he is scared shitless, who knows what Red Ho- Jason is going to do.

He tries to ready himself, move into a defensive position, but his whole body is shaking from fright.

-

Jason has no words for what he just saw. It is truly, truly, so baffling to him, that Robin of all people got scared by a gunshot? As if he doesn't get shot at for a daily occurrence?

If there was a reason why Tim wasn't a good Robin, it'd be this.

You can't be Robin and be scared of being shot. It's literally part of the whole 'Robin' thing.

Plus, if he really wanted the younger teen to die, he would killed him first thing at the Titan's Tower. He literally knocked out all of his friends so that it'd be 1v1 to test his worthiness, to see what made him so special that Bruce made him Robin.

After the fight, Jason came to understand why Tim was Robin, had even respected him, and so he left after making sure his friends woke up so they could help him.

But this? This was pathetic. Downright dogshit, Jason only feels disgusted at the reminder that he had fucking respected him.

If you're gonna flinch at a gunshot that clearly wasn't going to hit you, you don't deserve to be in this area. You have to be ready to fight with everything you've got, no matter the danger. You have to know what you're risking as well.

Every night, there's a risk that you'll die. And yet, he's scared shitless by a fucking gun? When there are so many other worse things?

Jason retracks his approval. Fuck that, this pretender doesn't deserve it.

Jason shoots another shot, closer to hitting, but not close enough to hit, and then leaves.

There's no need to fight someone who will obviously lose pathetically.

Chapter Text

Jason thought he was making progress. Being accepted into the family, no longer an outsider, someone who belonged with them.

What a fool he was...

He was never one of them, and never will...

He lost his place after he died. Maybe even before that. When Bruce and Alfred benched him from Robin, the one thing that let him stay in that family.

He should've known better...

Should've known that they wouldn't accept him, his methods too violent, too immoral, according to them.

Even when he switched to non-lethal methods, they always kept an eye on him. Waiting for him to screw up. Waiting until he blew up and broke one of Bruce's 'rules'. Always watching Jason as if he's a rabid dog about to bite anyone at anytime.

And as soon as he makes one small mistake, they lash out at him, reprimand, demean him, saying 'should've known better than to trust him'.

And yet... When they make the same mistakes, the others just comfort them, saying they weren't at fault...

Why is it only wrong when it's him? Why is he the only one blamed when things go wrong? Is he not 'supposedly' part of the family?

And so, Jason decided to put the family to the test, to really see how they'd react if Jason went too far. If they would try to help Jason, or condemn him.

And what do you know?!

He gets beaten to a fucking bloody pulp by 'daddy dearest', with him saying he never should've trusted Jason. The others all turned a blind eye.

Jason well could've died if not for Roy being there in time to save him. Bru- Batman would've broken his no-kill rule, just to teach a 'lesson' to his haywire son who shot a rogue. Never mind the countless rogues who've killed thousands, if not millions of civilians. No, Batman decides that Jason was worth breaking his no-kill rule instead...

And that was the moment that Jason understood.

He was never accepted in the family. Never belonged there. Forever an outsider. Why did he continue to go back to them like a dog? Despite everything they've done to him, just why?

A tear escapes as he stares at the ceiling of the safehouse Roy bought him back to, giving him emergency care.

At least now he knows where he stands in that family. Not in it.

He doesn't know what to do anymore.

He doesn't want to burden Roy, who's looking after Lian. Kory is back with the Titans, Bizarro and Artmetis just disappeared in front of him, and he doesn't know if he'll ever be able to see them again.

He dearly wishes he could, he misses them...

Maybe he could go back to the League and help Talia? He knows Talia cares for him like a son, and that she wouldn't do anything like Batman did. Jason also knows he'd be able to go back to his ways without any disapproval. And this way, he can still help people without the condemnation of Batman and the other bats.

Yeah...

That sounds like a good idea. This way, Roy won't worry about him; he needs to focus on Lian after all, and he knows that staying with them wouldn't be good for Lian's environment.

Jason's sure he'll be depressed, maybe even suicidal- right now he's too tired to be either, but after he has time to process what happened, it might happen, it has happened in the past after all.

And Talia would be able to help him. Doing whatever she can to help Jason through that period of time. She wouldn't fixate on trying to 'save' or 'fix' Jason, only focusing on helping and supporting him. And that's all he needs right now. A shoulder to lean on and help him. And God knows that Gotham is not the place for healing; on the contrary, it would only make things worse.

So until he's had enough time to heal, he'll stay the fuck away from Gotham.

Chapter Text

Jason doesn't think killing is objectively right. He knows what it does and the consequences of it.

But compared to Batman's no- kill rule? It's a whole lot better and more effective.

It won't last long-term, but it's still enough to get rid of criminals who are the worst of the worst. Criminals who, despite given chance after chance, do nothing to change, do nothing to atone, and carry on torturing or murdering hundreds if not thousands of civilians.

So sue Jason if he thinks killing heinous people isn't bad. But you cannot say to him that throwing them into a revolving door and expecting them to change will do anything.

Batman's doing this for vigilantes' shit for, what? 10+ years? If his methods actually worked, then why isn't Gotham better?

Oh, because he doesn't tackle the root of crime. He doesn't try hard enough to prevent or reduce the causes for why people to turn to crime, focusing on beating up blue-collar criminals and not white-collar criminals or corporates who continuously get away with crime/harm.

It's honestly very simple why some people resort to crime. Lower-class criminals become criminals for survival, or to support their worse-off family.

For drugs, people tend to buy them due to boredom, peer pressure, for pleasure, and all sorts of reasons. But the thing is, having a support network is crucial, because then, they may be less likely to try drugs in the first place, and if not, a support network may help them to quit. Plus, by decriminalising or legalising drugs, you can regulating it, put rules in place to reduce harm. The quality would be good, it's possible to limit how much someone gets, and it can help prevent kids from becoming addicted and turning into a druggie in their later life.

Another thing is employment and education. A lot of lower-class criminals resort to crime because they can't get a legal job due to their past or due to not being educated enough, and have to resort to crime to get by. So buy creating a job that allows them to be employed is crucial.

These are only a few things that cause someone to commit crimes.

And yet not enough has been done to tackle this problem, and because of that, the least Jason can do is rid the streets of criminals who are only commuting crime for the sake of it, feeling no remorse for their actions.

So yeah, Jason doesn't think killing is completely right or morally wrong, but it's a necessity he's willing to take until he can tackle the root cause of crime. Cause he sure as hell knows Bruce and Batman sure isn't doing enough to make any meaningful changes to Gotham.

Chapter Text

"Stay away from Tim, Hood", Dick snapped after seeing Jason try to approach Tim.

Jason just freezes on the spot and then sneers, "Fine. I'll stay away from Tim." Before he turns and walks away.

-

It's been months since that day, and there's been no sight of Red Hood.

The bats know he's still active, as evident with the missing bodies from all around Gotham, investigations revealing all the horrible acts they've done before they were killed.

And yet, they have yet to come across Red Hood. Not even once.

As if he were a ghost.

They are frustrated at all these murders, spending part of the day to try and locate Red Hood, but nothing comes up. Not even Oracle's cameras spot anything, as if he just poofed out of thin air.

But it sure doesn't help that all the rogues have been doing good things recently. They have to be up to something bad, and none of the bats know what. They just can't find a motive for all their actions, and it's driving them mad.

But anyway, all Dick can say is 'good riddance, now Tim won't be hurt ever again'. He can't get the memory out of his head, Tim recovering after Red Hood's attack at the tower, how Tim told him that Ja-Red Hood tried to kill him because he was jealous.

That just infuriated Dick. How could Red Hood? How could he do such a thing to his little brother?

He sighs and shakes his head. There's no need to think about Red Hood.

-

After being told to stay away from Tim, Jason understood where he stood in the family.

He stood outside of it. Not a part of it.

Maybe once upon a time, but not anymore.

And because of that, he's realised he doesn't need to bend over and keep trying to be amicable to them.

If they don't want him, then they'll get their wishes. And he'll make sure of it.

Actually...

Since he's not a bat, why not terrorise them? Get them back for everything they've done to him?

Rile them up, mock their methods, and show just how ineffective they are?

A mischievous grin makes its way onto Jason's face. He knows just who he should recruit to make the bats' lives a living hell; it'll be amazing.

-

Step 1. Find Victor Fries

Step 2. Help him find a cure for his wife.

Step 3. Cure his wife.

Step 4. Ask him to help build a freezer storage for the parts of Gotham that are worse off, so that in a case on emergency, they'll still be able to eat food.

Step 5. Find Harleen Quinn and Pamela Ivy.

Step 6. Ask if they want to join in on terrorising the bats, and tell them the benefits of joining. (This includes telling Pamela that if she teaches the kids in Crime Alley and the surrounding neighbourhoods, they might come to appreciate plants and help make the world a little greener)

Step 7. Find Harvey Dent.

Step 8. Convince him that if he helped Gotham be better, he could use that to one-up Batman. And what's better than one-upping the almighty Batman and seeing just how infuriated he would be?

Step 9. Find Waylon Jones.

Step 10. Come to an agreement; Jason gives and allows Waylon to eat the bodies of the scum of the earth, and Waylon protects civilians from any harm.

-

All in all, Jason, this is an okay-ish plan, some areas for improvement, but otherwise, what's better than this? Now he just needs to find Victor.

-

Finally. Finally, after a while fucking year, Dick managed to spot Red Hood. He locked onto his target and ran straight to the man, not waiting for him to escape their clutches.

He runs and runs until he's close enough to Red Hood. He jumps onto him, making sure the man is knocked onto the ground, twisting his arms behind his back and pressing his knee into his back.

But...

Red Hood is being too compliant, falling too easily, not saying any of his sarcastic remarks, just... Dead silent...

"Hood...?" He says in a quiet voice, uncertain. No response came.

"Hood?!" He yells, removing his knee and arms, keeping the man in place, and that's when he realised...

His knee was covered in blood...

No- No- No- Nonono....

He lifts Re- Jason's body, and the man is just limp, unmoving, unresponsive.

He- Dick can't do this! He can't lose Jason again! Not again, please no!

He turns on the cons and speaks frantically, asking for the Batmobile ASAP and for the medical bat to be ready.

The others reply, asking what's wrong, and all Dick says is that Jason is in critical condition.

Just then, he hears someone land on the roof behind him.

Dick turns around and sees- Jason...?

What...? But how? He looks down at the body in his arms, and then up again at Red Hood, who's right across from him, helmet in his arms, his expression smug.

"So I guess you do care about me? Sure didn't feel like it." He shrugs as if he didn't just place a fake body on a roof for Dick to find.

Dick slowly gets up, "How. Could. You! First, you try to kill Tim, and now this?!" Dick yells, throwing his hand out in anger.

Jason just snorts, "Ah- of course, because I never tried to kill Tim, you see, I was testing him. Seeing what made him so worthy of Robin. And please, who told you I was trying to kill him?"

"Lies. You tried to kill him, he said so himself." Dick sneered.

Jason sighs, "Of course it was him," he shakes his head disapprovingly, "You really think I'd fail to kill Tim? If I wanted him dead, he would have died ages ago. It's quite sad to know how little you think of me."

"Even if that is true, how could you do this?" He points to the fake body.

Jason smiles like the devil, "Why not? I'm not part of the family, so I can do whatever I want to do." And this time, the smile turns so bright, as bright as Jason's smile used to be back when he was Robin.

And this stops Dick for a second, going back in time to when they worked on missions together, smiling as their coordination worked perfectly together.

"Welp- I've done what I wanted to accomplish, so you'll have to excuse me now." And with that, he salutes Dick before falling backwards.

Dick screams, rushing to the edge of the building, but there's no sight of Red Hood.

He bitterly opens his coms again and tells them that they don't need to prepare the med bay anymore, or the Batmobile.

Chapter Text

It was a normal night like usual.

Jason went back to one of his safehouses after a relatively quiet night in Gotham (as quiet as it can get without being weird). And one Spoiler and Signal decided to follow him back, listing all kinds of foods they'd love to just eat right about now.

Jason sighs. One singular mistake of feeding them after patrol caused this to happen.

Since then, they've been badgering him to make this or that.

And sure, maybe Jason does end up relenting when they come back with all the ingredients, but he just doesn't want the ingredients to go to waste, okay?

Anyways, this time was different.

As Jason was cooking for them, Steph asked if he ever thought of streaming himself cooking.

Jason pauses, looks up at Steph and sees her serious but curious expression.

"Uhh, why would I?" And don't get Jason wrong, he has nothing against it, but he doesn't see the point of it.

"Don't you know? You can do charity streams to help raise awareness for non-profit organisations. Plus, you do love cooking, so you can donate it to the shelters at the east end of Gotham, that way you don't have to worry about any of them starving." Duke states, also curious why Jason hasn't done it yet, since it'd be so in character for him.

Jason gives a thoughtful hum, "Never knew that existed. Might try it out sometimes, thanks for telling me." He gives a small, gentle smile.

"For that, you two can get whatever dessert you want," Jason says to reward the two for giving him another way to help Gotham.

The two fist whisper 'yes!' as they do a fist pump of victory before high-fiving each other.

"Man, aren't I just the smartest?" Steph says smugly as she flicks her hair back.

Jason just sighs, "Yeah, yeah, just shut up and eat." He says as he puts two plates in front of Steph and Duke.

Today, they decided they wanted spaghetti, so he made some.

"Now then, once I have the streaming set up, make sure none of the others find out. I don't need any of their teasing. Otherwise, if they do find out, you guys know what you won't get anymore, alright?" He points a fork towards the two.

The two who were already stuffing their faces just look up at Jason and nod frantically, continuing to demolish Jason's spaghetti.

All Jason could do was sigh and shake his head as a small chuckle left his mouth.

"No need to gulf it all down, I got plenty more." Is all he says before getting the ingredients to make dessert.

Chapter Text

Jason's gone rogue.

He's gone back to mindlessly killing. He even killed some of the rogues (only the ones beyond redemption)

Sure, all of them happened to be horrible people once they were investigated further, but that's besides the point.

The point is, is that Jason cut off all communication and is killing again.

Bruce slams his fists onto the desk of the batcomputer. He's enraged. Has Jason not learnt his lesson? Just how much discipline does he need to be in line and follow the rules?

Bruce sighs and rubs his nose. He then stands up and lowers the cowl onto his head, heading towards the Batmobile. He's most likely to get answers if he goes to Crime Alley.

-

Just before arriving at Crime Alley, Bruce was attacked.

Civilians rushed to the Batmobile, uncaring for their own safety and started beating at the vehicle with all sorts of weapons; baseball bats with nails sticking out of them, metal pipes, planks of wood, and more.

This shocked Bruce, forcing him to come to a stop so he wouldn't run any of them over.

The attacks kept coming, eggs were thrown, and tomatoes too. The pristine Batmobile slowly turned into one of those cars that are vandalised by cheaters or just a horrible person in general.

They were all shouting, Bruce managed to read their lips, saying to leave, get out, and that he wasn't welcome here.

And yet, he couldn't move, not at the risk of harming them, so he called for the batwing to pick him up.

After managing to come back to the cave, he plops his ass onto the chair. He then opened comms and ordered Dick, Tim and Damian to go to Crime Alley and find out what happened to Red Hood.

-

Unfortunately....

None of them succeeded. All of them were chased out of Crime Alley as soon as they were a step in. Red Robing was being treated the worst; he was even called the 'imposter Robin'.

When Tim heard this while being attacked, he didn't know what to feel. He just... Felt angry at Jason. Because what is Jason, but an annoying asshole who should've stayed dead?

He swears that once he finds Jason, he's gonna beat him up.

-

Tim, in fact, does not beat up Jason.

In fact, Tim was the one who lost.

It wasn't even a real fight.

-

Jason revealed himself to Gotham, for Babs to find and relay to the others.

Tim volunteered to go and 'chat' with Jason. To make him stop his madness.

And off Tim went, headed towards Crime Alley.

There, on a roof, was Jason, standing like some edge lord, how dramatic.

He lands on the rooftop behind the man, readying his bo staff to attack him.

But then, out of nowhere, Tim was tasered from behind.

Just before falling unconscious, Tim saw a smiling woman behind him, holding the fucking taser in her hand as she whispered, "Nighty night, pretender~"

-

Jason stared into the distance, smoking a cig as he heard footsteps land behind him. He readies his pistol to shoot. But the next thing he heard kind of honestly surprised him. He turns around after hearing a taser, seeing one of his followers smiling innocently as she tasers Red Robin.

It was honestly quite a contrasting scene, seeing her take down Red Robin without any effort, looking as if she never committed a crime.

Jason just chuckles and walks towards her, saying thanks as he picks up Tim to chain up at his warehouse. Although Jason no longer has any beef with Tim, he's not so sure about the people who follow him. Especially after finding out that Jason was their beloved 'Street Robin', and hearing what Tim said to him.

Jason's well and truly given up on the family he once belonged to, realising that no matter how much he compromises, how much he bends over and ruins himself just for a hint of approval, it'll never come. He'll always be a bad criminal in their eyes, and as soon as he does one thing wrong, he needs to be 'disciplined'. If that's what you can call it, he snorts.

Jason should've reason earlier, realised earlier that he was being abused. But he didn't. Because victims are blind to it, not realising it u til someone points it out to them. And even then... Some deny it, thinking it impossible.

But Jason reflected on everything, and after each memory, he couldn't deny it anymore. Bruce and the others abused him. It wasn't just physical; it was also psychological and emotional.

And Jason had to get away. He could no longer bear the thought of enduring the abuse Bruce swore he'd get rid of.

It's funny. Bruce swore he'd make Gotham a better place, swore he'd save children from abusive parents, and yet... He became what he fought against. Quite ironic, isn't it?

Anyways, one night when he was in his office, he had somehow managed to fall asleep.

He guessed he had a nightmare, because his people told him that he was crying and begging for mercy.

They told him that it was okay for him to talk to them, that talking about it might lift his shoulders a bit.

And Jason trusts his people, knows they'd do anything to protect him, never spilling anything about him to anyone.

And so he talks. He tells them some of the things that've happened; how he was once Robin.

One of them immediately shouted an 'Ah!' before telling the others that Jason was the 'Street Robin', making everyone gasp, saying 'no way!'. Jason just chuckles at all of their reactions.

One of them came up to him, placed a hand onto Jason's own, looked him in the eyes with a gentle smile, telling him, "Thank you. Without you, I, along with many others here, would've died." And with that, they ruffle Jason's hair, resulting in a huff from Jason, whose face was covered in red.

They just chuckled as they stood back up and went back to where they originally were.

After that, Jason continued his story, glossing over the traumatic stuff and simplifying some things. How he tried to test Batman, tried to get him to show he loved Jason. But it failed, and Batman chose the Joker over him.

This enraged all of them, the majority of them being victims of the Joker themselves, of a friend or family member of someone who was. It enraged them that the man who claimed to bring justice would do the opposite. Saving the life of someone who's killed countless. It only showed where Batman's priorities truly were.

Then, Jason talked about how the 'new' Robin. How he saw the new, where not even a year after his disappearance (because telling them he died would be too much for them), he had been replaced, upgraded. And not only that, but his legacy had been wiped, reduced to nothing but a reckless, violent Robin, from yours truly, the 'new' Robin.

If hearing about Batman made them enraged, then holy cow, were they exploding.

Some slammed their fists on the table, cursing. You could see the way their veins popped out in anger.

Jason could see just how much his people loved him, and honestly? This was all he needed. This is his family now, and he's glad he at least realised before it was too late.

He'll do anything to protect his family, and his family will do anything to protect him. Even if that means scaring the bats away from Crime Alley, and making an effort to become a safer place, just so Jason didn't have to work as hard to protect them.

Chapter Text

Jason, who wants nothing to do with Bruce after having been shown that he was not as important as his morals, or even the Joker's life.

Deciding to make the world a better place with the Outlaws, people who understand him. They all have problems, but they're there for each other no matter what, and that's all Jason needs.

He gets rid of any evil he sees using his all-blades. Calling upon them to stab someone who screams in pain as smoke escapes their body.

For those that are possessed but are scum if the earth? He makes sure it hurts when he exorcises them, only to slice their heads off after.

He casts spells to the places he's been, to protect civilians, and also to signal him if they ever come to harm's way. So that he can get there in time to help.

But Jason can't stay away from Gotham forever; it was his home, still is.

And so he goes back, and not wanting the disgusting clown live another breath, he sneaks to Amusement Park, escaping all possible cameras, making his return unknown.

The Joker just sits as he fiddles with this and that, planning his next act for the Bat.

Jason just slowly walks towards him, his steps soundless, masked by his training.

And then he casts a spell, the Joker jolts as something(?) wraps around his body, from shoulders to feet, so tight he struggles to breathe, or even escape.

Jason even made sure his mouth was sealed; there was no way he was gonna let the Joker speak.

Jason then brings his Kris out, juggling it in his hand as he decides what to do.

Although Jason has now gotten over the man in front of him, he still wants him to suffer.

And so, the first cut began.

Meticulously, Jason began slicing Joker's skin over and over again.

Not enough to seriously injure him, but enough for blood to flow, enough to cause burning pain.

And after the hundredth cut, the Joker breathed his last.

And just to make sure, Jason set his body in flames, watching it turn into dust, carried away by the wind.

His job here is done. Now to focus on improving Eat end of Gotham.

-

When Jason first came back, he came back as Red Hood to spite Batman. He made his return dramatic; eye catching.

This time? He doesn't care about getting their attention. That's why he goes quietly back to his criminal empire, which was miraculously still up and going. These people who were and still are loyal to Red Hood.

He reveals who he is and asks if they'll follow him again.

They decide to test him, to see if he's still 'worthy', but deep down, they already are, after all, for many of them, Red Hood had saved their lives, given them hope in this God-forsaken world.

And thus, Jason took charge again, but this time. It wasn't as Red Hood. Just someone from behind, unknown, shrouded in mystery.

Jason makes sure everything works properly from behind a desk. Giving orders on what to do next, while staying out of Oracle's eyes. She doesn't need to know about anything related here.

Sometimes, Jason would go out and do things himself, check that everything was okay, stopping any crimes he saw. He makes sure he always evades places with cameras. But it's Crime Alley; it hardly has any cameras, and if there are, they're faulty at best, so he hardly worries about being caught.

And after setting up a reliable enough system, Jason feels confident enough to leave the East end of Gotham in his people's hands; he can trust them to keep the civilians safe even if he's gone for a bit.

And so, for a few more years, he goes on adventures with the Outlaws, occasionally coming back to Gotham just to check up on things.

That is...

Until word had spread that a new player had surfaced, called Mockingjay.

Mockingjay, the man who brings hope, rebellion, and resilience to Crime Alley, the Bowery, the Narrows.

When he's here, you know you're safe, you can hope to live another day without any suffering.

-

The words were loud enough for the bats to hear. They didn't like it.

No crime lord was good. They have to make sure he wasn't doing anything bad. And thus, Batman moves.

The confrontation was quite easy. Mockingjay sat on the edge of a building, petting a cat that was on his lap as he stared out into the view. His face was bare, revealing a young man's face.

A face Bruce knows well.

"What are you doing?" He snarls.

Jason doesn't turn back, still looking out into the distance, "Not surprised I'm back?"

"..." Bruce doesn't reply.

Jason just sighs, "I no longer care about any of you bats. If you think I'm doing all this for attention? You'll need one hell of an enlightenment. I'm just making sure the East end is safe my way, and I don't care if you disagree with my methods. You have no right to demand that I follow your 'rules'. All I want is for peace, so I'd very much like it if you'd kindly go." He turns to face Bruce, a polite business smile on his face.

That's all Jason says before jumping off the building and onto the emergency fire escape below, climbing into one of the rooms.

Bruce just stands there. He was so ready to fight Jason like he once did, but this? He was not prepared. In fact, the opposite, he stood there frozen until he got a call from comms telling him to come over and help.

Chapter Text

The first time it happened, it occurred after his confrontation with Bruce.

His neck was sliced, and blood was spurting out. Jason could feel his life come to a stop for the second time. He knows what it feels like after all.

But the thing is, he woke up again.

He woke up healed without a scratch, no hint of harm to his body.

Since then, whenever he's been injured, he'd always wake up the next day without a scratch, no matter how deadly the injury was.

-

After the confrontation where Jason gained a new ability, he decided to take a break from Gotham, travel around the Earth, and help those in need.

He's fighting enemies that are clocked in darkness, and the next thing he knows, he's submerged with shadows(?)

What the fuck?!

He somehow figures out how to jump out of the shadow, slicing his enemies with the all-blades, resulting in them screaming in pain as they disintegrate.

After getting rid of all his enemies, Jason takes a short breath before looking down, and umm...

His legs are covered in the same darkness as his enemies...

Seriously, what the ever flying fuck is going on???

Deciding to try test out his new(?) ability, he slowly submerges into a shadow, slowly slinking down until only the top part of his head was visible.

Jason's sure it would be a weird sight for anyone who came across him, just seeing a body submerged in solid concrete.

He decides to explore it a bit more, fully submerging himself in the shadow, aiming to see if he can move to another shadow that's not connected.

And holy fuck.

It actually worked?!

He rises out of another shadowed area in amazement. Holy fuck, this is gonna be useful.

-

During his little adventure outside of Gotham, Jason heard that Arsenal, aka Roy Harper, was being held by the Quracan military.

And being the oh-so-generous man that Jason was, went to save him with Starfire.

And thus began the start of a new team, The Outlaws.

It was great, amazing even! Finally feeling like he had a place he belonged to.

But then he heard about the All-Caste, how they had fallen from their sworn enemy, the Untitled. As one of the last members of the All-Caste, Jason swore he'd find and destroy all remaining Untitled. Luckily, Roy and Kori were happy to come along and help him, making him feel eternally grateful to them.

And this is their mission begun, and to say it was uneventful is an understatement.

During a fight, Jason had gotten badly injured, a spike of some sort impaling his right shoulder and left leg; another spike had grazed the side of his stomach, thank God it missed.

And another spike was coming his way, having no weapon in his hands, he tried to simply block it, but the next thing he knew?

Spikes formed in front of him, shooting out. One of them hit the spike that was coming towards him; the rest impaling his opponent, killing them.

Jason just looks down at his hand in shock.

No.

But seriously, what is going on with Jason? What the fuck? First, he doesn't stay injured, second, he can turn into a shadow, and now he can create spikes from nothing and move them??

What the fuck is he? Some OP main character? It was such a ridiculous though he snorted at it before shaking his head.

He needs to focus and help Roy and Kori take down the others, and thus he starts creating spikes, shooting them towards their opponent and killing them.

As the spikes hit, Roy and Kori pause, turning to look at Jason in a similar expression of shock he just had.

After finishing up, Roy rushed up to him, asking what that was. He just shrugged, saying he has no clue and that he'd explain when they got somewhere safe to camp.

-

After telling the two about his abilities, they were amused. Roy asks with fascination about just how it happened and why. Jason just shrugs, telling them it happened after Batman killed him after choosing the Joker.

Roy jokes about the Gods giving him a gift in return for all the suffering that he didn't deserve.

The conversation continued until it delved into what Jason's next ability might be, how and when he'd get it.

Jason bet that within the next month, maybe something like telepathy from being attacked by aliens that have telepathy?

Roy bet within two weeks, with the ability to fly after fighting a swan.

What goes on in Roy's mind is a mystery, and he is clearly joking, as evident from the way he could barely keep his laugh in while telling them his bet.

Kori bet in three months, with shape shifting from a magic user that'll shift Jason into a cute bunnie.

Jason sighs and then chuckles. The two aren't taking it seriously, and he's grateful for it. He didn't want to be considered a freak, and the way Roy and Kori are acting? It doesn't even imply that they consider him to be any different.

-

They all lost...

It happened not even a week later when they faced a summoner.

Jason can fucking create shadow animals that are just as deadly as the real thing. A venomous snake? His shadow has the same venom, and is actually more potent than the real thing...

Jason is seriously startled by his new powers. Next thing he knows, he'll be able to fly for God's sake!

-

...

Jason can now fly.

How?

Well... Turns out he doesn't even have to be fighting against someone with certain powers.

He was just enjoying his day, fighting alongside the Outlaws like usual, when Artemis threw him!

And then mid-flight, wings magically poofed themselves into existence.

This frightened Jason to a whole other level, cause not only did he just fucking grow(?) wings, he somehow already knows how to use them???

He flies straight to where Artemis tried throwing him and finishes the fight.

After, as if knowing that he no longer needed it, the wings poof back into the void, only coming back into view when he intended to fly.

Well damn.

-

It's been quite a few months since Jason last gained a new ability, to which he was kind of thankful for. It was seriously freaking him out each time he got a new one.

He thought he'd reached his max limit, but he guessed wrong.

The Outlaws had decided to take a sabbatical, going back home or something else. And thus, Jason was travelling back to Gotham, his home.

But then he got ambushed.

Ambushed by a fucking necromancer.

You wanna know what happened next? Jason got the ability to raise the dead (how funny would it be if he could bring back his younger self).

Anyways, he demolished the necromancer and made his way back to Crime Alley.

There, he re-established his position, using his dead friends and shadow animals to make sure everyone understood the rules around the neighbourhood.

From there, the name spread: Gotham's Undead Nightmare.

Someone who'll give you nightmares for doing things against his rules, tagging an undead buddy to them to monitor them to ensure they don't break his rules again.

Word spreads far and wide that the bats catch wind of it. Unfortunately, that is a tale for another time. For now, Jason is too busy reading to the kids who are snuggled against multiple shadow animals that are somehow just as fluffy as their counterparts, such as the giant panda, samoyed, a whole range of big felines, and more.

Chapter Text

Anger and pain.

Two sides of the same coin.

Jason uses both. One he always feels, the other to mask the first one up.

He always feels pain.

Pain from knowing his murderer was still alive, alive and able to escape from the revolving door that is Arkham anytime he wants. Pain from finding out he's been replaced by an upgrade; an upgrade in every possible way. Pain from the punches his supposed 'father' gives. Pain from being rejected from hi-no, not his, the bat family. So much pain that just never ends.

And what better way to mask his pain but through anger, the only thing he knows how to show?

This way, no one notices he's hurt or crying out for help.

Jason is fine.

And yet...

Every so often, Jason can feel something slipping out. Whenever he's alone in bed, curled into a ball, a tear falls down his cheek as he tries to sleep.

Longing, envy, despair, sadness... All those emotions that are hardly ever see the light of day, it's hard to believe Jason is capable of feeling them.

After all, Jason only feels anger, right?

Chapter Text

If anyone knows Jason, they know he's a bookworm, always reading a book in his free time. And yet...

He can't pronounce for shit.

It became apparent when Jason asked if there was anything in the refrigerator. Instead of pronouncing it as 'ri-frij-uh-rey-teh' as it should be, he instead pronounced it as 're-frij-erator'.

And you should've seen Alfred's expression. It was the funniest thing ever, seeing his ever blank expression have a slight frown, his brows tensing a little, as if he wanted to correct Jason so badly, but ultimately decided not to.

-

"Damn, you should really become an Olympic athlete (ath-ah-leet) instead of just a cop, Dick." He says mockingly towards Dick, who was practising some gymnastics.

Dick just looks at him in disbelief, hearing Jason pronounce the word athlete of all words, wrong. He was left speechless, seeing just how cocky Jason looked, so it felt wrong to try correct him. So Dick just decided to laugh it off and continue his routine.

-

"Yo Trimmers, got any cache (Cah-shay)? I gotta hide some things." He calls out to Tim after spotting him

Tim just narrows his eyes at Jason, "A what?"

"Cache (Cah-shay), you know, the hidden storage? Jeez, how are you this dumb?"

Tim just gaps, "It's cache (cash), you dumbass, and I do have one, but why should I give it to you?" He crosses his arms.

Jason just waves of the correction in pronunciation, "I got some stuff I need hidden for a while, you want some blackmail on Damian, right? I'll let you in on a secret", he says smugly, as if he was so sure Jason would take the bait.

... And he was right, Tim agreed easily. Jason then told Tim what he had on Damian.

-

"Yo, Cass!" Jason waves at Cass after spotting her. He returns the greeting with a smile and a nod.

"When's your next ballet (bal-ay)? Wanted to go and support you." he says with a smile.

Cass just smiles back, "Next Saturday at 7pm. I'll make sure to leave you a spot."

-

"Got anything planned in February (Feb-oo-air-ee? Steph? Bet you'd be getting all sorts of chocolate," Jason says teasingly to Steph, and can elbow on her head.

Steph bursts out laughing, "Oh my god! You can't pronounce February (Feb-roo-air-ee) correctly! I gotta tell the other!" She laughs so hard she falls to the ground, smacking it hard, struggling to catch a breathe after a few minutes straight of laughing.

Jason just looks down at her with mischievousness, "I do know how to pronounce February (Feb-roo-air-ee) Steph, it's called acting." And the way Jason said it so fluently, and not a hint of hesitation at making a mistake, stops Steph.

Now it's Jason's turn to laugh, mocking her for being unable to tell that he did it on purpose.

Steph just sighs, shaking her head is disbelief.

"So you in on the act?" Jason asks smugly.

Steph grins back, "Oh, definitely, I wanna see just how long it takes for the others to realise."

-

After the team-up, all the other bats suffered for days at how Jason and now Steph continued to mispronounce words, despite them trying their best to correct them.

That is, until they finally figured out that they were just pretending this whole time.

Chapter Text

Jason is both the same child who died, and no longer him at the same time.

He still has the same hobbies, likes and dislikes, habits, and so on.

Jason still wants Gotham to become safer. But he doesn't think Batman's way does anything effective, only resulting in more victims. It sure doesn't help with how corrupt the GCPD is, either.

Jason once believed that Batman, or at least Bruce, would avenge him after he accepted his fate in that warehouse.

But then he came back. He came back and saw that Bruce did nothing. Saw his murderer still alive and on the loose.

What else was he supposed to feel but anger and betrayal?

People change as time passes. It's normal to, everyone changes. Even Bruce did, it's abnormal not to.

How can people expect him to be the same boy who died painfully? How do people expect him to be the same innocent boy after all the traumatic experiences he's experienced? With everything he's gone through, it's obvious why he's become disillusioned with Batman's methods.

And yet, at the same time, they also view him as a monster. Someone entirely different from the little boy he once was. As if it were unthinkable for the little boy to become who he is now. That only a monster would do the things he did, and the little boy was no monster.

But... He's still the same kid, just different, grown up. Sure, not in a healthy or sane way, but just like how experiences define and change people, the same happened to him.

Why do they see Jason as either this or that and not both?

He is and isn't the same child that died. It just depends on how you look at it, and where you look.

Chapter Text

Before dying, Jason had never killed anyone. Never directly, at least.

And yet- Bruce accused him of pushing Garzonas, accused him of murdering someone.

As if, Jason was the same as the criminals they faced...

It broke something in young Jason, once so hopeful about making Gotham a safer place, once believing in Batman's methods. Jason would never kill someone, sure he didn't catch him from falling, but he didn't push him.

And then he died, betrayed by a mother he only knew for a few hours. Beaten black and blue by Gotham's famous murderous clown before dying from the explosion.

Surely, surely Bruce would avenge him, right...?

No.

Bruce didn't.

The clown still lived, and a young boy took his place, as if Jason didn't die in that costume.

So after waking up in his grave, digging his way out, being catatonic for a couple of years, finding out everything that happened after he died, training with league associates, and whatnot, Jason had a marvellous plan.

Kill the Joker in front of Bruce.

The thing is, is that Jason's managed to not kill anyone since he's come back, not directly at least. He's saving it for his confrontation, taking his first life in front of Bruce. What better revenge than this?

He'd tell Bruce, "You thought I was a killer when I pushed Garzonas, too bad I didn't. And now, I'm gonna take my first life because of you. How do you feel, Bruce?" While having Joker in his arms, a gun to his head.

It's perfect.

Now, he just has to execute his plan.

-

And execute his plans, he does.

He's managed to take over Gotham's underworld, he's 'decapitated' the heads of eight lieutenants (they're in a basement still breathing, he made fake heads) and has made a mockery of Batman, making him run around in circles.

He's finally revealed his identity to Bruce and is on the run, jumping from building to building, as if to run from Batman.

He crashes into a window, and Batman continues to beat him up. They're in a hallway now, and Jason grabs a pistol from behind and points it towards Bruce.

This obviously stops the man, and Jason then kicks a nearby door, revealing the Joker.

He confronts Bruce about how it was only the Joker he wanted gone. Not Penguin, or Scarecrow, or Dent, just the Joker.

He tried to gauge Batman's reaction, noticing that he would never let the Joker be killed.

He hides his smirk, putting on an anguished expression, "You leave me no choice Bruce,"

He grabs the Joker into his arms, pointing the gun straight at the Joker's head, and then he speaks, "You know, I've never actually killed anyone before. Not Garzonas, and definitely not the eight lieutenants. Those were just dummies, not even real. Joker will be my first kill. And it's because of you that I'll be taking my first life. How do you feel about that, Bruce?"

And Batman's expression crumbles, making Jason grin with joy.

He can see Batman try to think of a way to stop Jason. He can see the glint of a batarang.

He doesn't wait for Batman to strike, pulling the trigger.

Blood shoots out, splatting on Jason's face.

Batman yells, and the batarang is thrown; it makes contact with Jason's neck.

Next thing Jason knows, he's on the ground, fumbling his hands to stop the bleeding as he looks at Bruce with both shock and betrayal.

He never thought Bruce would go this far to save the Joker. It was hysterical, how the one thing to break Bruce's no-kill rule was killing his arch-enemy, and not his son...

Jason's thoughts become too loud, his ears ringing, making it hard to think properly, but the one thing he knows is that if he's going down, then so is Bruce.

He reaches into his pocket and presses the button to detonate the bomb, much to Bruce's surprise as he jumps out of the window, leaving Jason to both bleed out and die from the explosion. Just like he originally did.

Jason just laughs just before the bomb explodes; it's just ironic, isn't it?

The way he dies is so different, and yet, all the same.

Chapter Text

Blue is good. Red is evil.

Nightwing is a hero. Red Hood is an anti-hero.

Nightwing's theme is blue. Red Hood's is red.

Nightwing will forever be considered a hero. When does he make a mistake? It's not his fault; his circumstances forced him to do it.

Red Hood? He'll never be considered a hero like Nightwing. It doesn't matter what he does; it doesn't matter how many lives he saves. He will always be remembered as the Crime Lord who severed eight heads (of drug dealers who had no remorse for selling to kids and worse).

It doesn't matter that Red Hood changed his ways, switching from lethal to non-lethal. He's still a killer. It doesn't matter that he was a traumatised teenager when he did it.

It doesn't matter that he compromises to the point of no longer being himself just to be accepted by the bats. They only see a ticking time bomb waiting to go off.

Whenever Red Hood makes a mistake, it's always his fault. It's a fact that can't be changed. It doesn't matter if the circumstances forced him to do it; he still did it, therefore, he alone is at fault.

Chapter Text

"You never communicated with us, Jason."

"I always have"

"No you haven't?"

Jason just scoffs, "Name one moment when I haven't"

"Just before you came back to the manor and wouldn't respond to us when we talked to you?"

Jason just looks at him deadpan before snorting, "ah yes- when I was still recovering from a slice on my neck and couldn't speak the whole time. Any other examples?"

"Yo- WHAT? WHAT 'slice on the neck'?! DON'T YOU DARE CHANGE THE TOPIC!"

Jason just stares, shocked, "You- you don't know? Did Bruce never tell you?" He says in disbelief.

"Tell me what?"

"..." Jason frowns, "Since I'm so 'uncommunicative', you can go find out yourself, if you want to know, I'm sure it's on the bat computer." He says before turning to leave, leaving behind a confused Nightwing who's now planning to get to the bottom of Jason's neck scar.

Chapter Text

It's been on Damian's mind a lot.

Quitting Robin to become a doctor.

Still unsure, he decides to confide in his father; surely he'd be able to give good advice.

-

Father just said to give it a long thought if he truly wants to go down that path; it was like he was reluctant for Damian to leave and become a doctor. As if he couldn't believe Damian, of all people, wanted to help treat others for the simple fact that he was raised as an assassin...

-

Damian goes from one member of the family to the next, even going to Gordon and Pennyworth.

But alas, no good advice was given...

Some had simply laughed in his face, as if Damian had said something ridiculous. Others would say that Damian should just do what he wants, but their expression, just like Bruce, they didn't think Damian was capable of being a doctor.

He sighs, now only one more person to ask. He just knows that it'll end the same way, especially with how Todd is.

-

"Do you think quitting Robin and becoming a doctor is a good idea?" Damian simply asks, sitting on the edge of a building, after Jason found out he was tailing him.

Jason looks down at Damian, eyes wide with shock for a bit, and then a gentle smile spreads across his face as he ruffles Damian's hair.

"You don't need to worry about that, Damian. You'd make a great doctor. I'm sure of it." He said with such confidence that made something in Damian tickle, "And stepping away from Robin? I honestly think it's the best thing you can do. You really shouldn't be stuck here if you don't want to stay. If you want to be a doctor, I say go for it. You don't have to worry about what others say about you."

Damian just stays quiet as he looks out into the distance before 'tt' and moves to stand up, "It's ridiculous how you, of all the people in our family, gave the best advice."

"Aww, surprised that I can say smart things, you little brat? What can I say, I'm just that good." Jason shrugs smugly.

"Tt, let us be off and finish our patrol." Is all Damian says before grappling with Jason's patrol area.

"Our?? Hey! Who said you could join my patrol?!" Jason yells in disbelief, grappling behind Damian but chuckling as he spots the redness of Damian's ears.

Chapter Text

Instead of the Lazarus pit making Jason full of rage and green. It makes him act on his desires, taking over his consciousness to do whatever he's hiding deep down.

It scared him because he didn't want to know what he truly wanted. He doesn't want to know (he already does, though)

-

It happened during his stay with Ducra after Talia dropped him off at the All-Caste.

He was just feeling lonely, and then green slowly seeped into his vision, and his eyelids closed. He felt floaty, bubbly; he didn't want to wake up.

But like all good things, they come to a close, and Jason opens his eyes.

He opens then to find that he was lying down on someone's lap. Someone who was stroking his head slowly and gently.

It, it felt nice...

Jason wonders how long it's been since someone last did this for him. Probably before his mum died... Bruce never did, the most was ruffling his hair after patrol or him doing something good.

He then realised that tears were falling down his face. He's always been a crier, and for some reason, he just can't stop as he snuggles closer to who he presumes is Ducra, who just sighs while continuing to pet Jason's head, muttering about how Jason is still just a pup despite his big size.

Chapter Text

Immortal Jason au, where as each shitty experience, Jason gets very depressed and tries to off himself, only to always, always get back up in the end.

Sometimes it'll be as fickle as waking up the wrong way.

Sometimes it's because he's being beaten so badly he nearly dies for the nth time, by the person he once thought of as his dad, no less...

But every single time, it's guaranteed that Jason will start having some not-so-friendly thoughts, spiralling into deeper, darker thoughts. And these thoughts? They always whisper a clear solution

If he were gone, it would all disappear.

The pain, the betrayal, the guilt, everything.

And the thing is, when Jason offs himself, he has a moment of peace.

No dark thoughts, no haunting memories, no one to tell him what he should or shouldn't do or be.

With death, he is just Jason.

Not Jason Todd-Wayne, not Robin, or even Red Hood.

Just Jason.

But he always wakes up in the end. Even if he doesn't want to...

Chapter Text

When Bruce accused Jason of murdering Felipe, Jason froze.

He couldn't believe it.

Bruce actually thought he would kill someone? Sure, he didn't 'save' the man, but he didn't kill him!

Jason knows killing is wrong; he even stopped Bruce from killing multiple times! He even forgave Two-Face for killing his dad!

Sure, he was angry and wanted the man to atone for his sins, but he still has morals, and murdering isn't one of them.

And then Felipe's dad died trying to avenge his son, Bruce tells him that actions have consequences, heavily implying that he was the cause of both Felipe's and Felipe's dad's death...

-

Jason died. Beaten black and blue by a clown and then exploded in the warehouse because his mother sold him out to the Joker.

And miraculously, Jason came back.

Dug his way through his coffin, through the dirt, and out onto the streets.

But luck wasn't kind to Jason as he was then hit by a car, resulting in his brain becoming damaged, his consciousness falling asleep despite the body still functioning.

Two years passed, and when the lights in the brain finally returned, he was in green water, yelling his lungs out as he clawed his way out.

-

Talia.

It appears that Talia had found him and brought him back to Nanda Parbat.

She explained everything that happened after his death, and Jason could only stare at the newspaper.

That Joker was back in his cell, by the dynamic duo, Batman and Robin.

Not only did Jason feel anger, but also grief and betrayal.

Did he matter so little to Bruce that there were no consequences of the Joker killing him?

Jason could only laugh.

He should've known when Bruce assumed he had murdered Felipe, with the only evidence being that Jason was there when he fell.

Even though Jason had told Bruce he hadn't murdered the man, and to believe him.

Despite all the good Jason did as Robin, Bruce still believed he was a criminal, and nothing would ever change that thought.

Chapter Text

Jason slowly opens his eyes, seeing the familiar surroundings of his safe house. He reaches up to his neck, feeling the stitches across it.

Jason was honestly surprised he survived; he didn't think he'd make it as blood continued to pour out of his neck.

He slowly sits up, groaning as all the bruises flare in pain. He looks to his bedside table and sees a note.

Jason picks it up and reads it.

Huh. It's instructions on how to care for his wounds, mainly the one on his neck.

Jason tries to think about who saved him. Maybe it was Bruce?

He can't remember what happened before the explosion hit, but maybe Bruce had managed to save him this time?

A small smile makes its way onto his face at the thought that Bruce saved him and not the clown.

So Bruce really does care about him? Or at least, more than the clown?

But as always, just when Jason's about to be happy about something, he notices the words coming from the tv.

He looks at it, and he freezes.

What...?

There in bold words, the news shows Batman throwing the Joker into the Batmobile after the building exploded, driving off to Arkham Asylum.

...

A tear makes its way down Jason's cheek, his expression now blank.

He should've known better.

If Bruce didn't choose him when he died, why would he choose him now?

And with these thoughts, a small one that questioned who truly saved him grew.

-

It's been a few years since that night, and Jason would say he's gotten over it, having finally found his place with the Outlaws.

Tonight, like usual, they were fighting some aliens and were now taking the alien tech back with them.

That is, until the tech in Jason's hand started glowing.

Then, a big flash blinded all of their eyes, causing Jason to drop the tech.

It takes a while for all of them to open their eyes again, but when they do, they realise they're no longer where they were a minute ago.

Jason quickly realised where they were, saying they were in Gotham, with a solemn face. He hadn't been back since that night.

They jump from building to building to get a clue about whatever the tech teleported them to, and as he spots a certain warehouse, he stops.

"Why the hold up, Jaybird?" Roy asks.

"I know that warehouse, and unless we're in the past, it shouldn't still be up." And as he speaks, he slowly realises something, rushing towards the warehouse, leaving his surprised teammates who didn't expect him to rush off like that.

-

They managed to catch up to Jason, who had sneaked into the rafter, looking down at three individuals.

Three individuals they all knew well.

So well that they were teammates with one of them.

This confused the Outlaws, looking at the Jason in front of them for answers.

He mutters a curse as the younger Jason says, "Why? I'm not talking about killing Penguin, or Scarecrow, or Dent. I'm talking about him. Just him. And doing it because... because he took me away from you." And boy did he sound devastated, as if it was the least Bruce could have done for him.

Jason doesn't answer them, keeping his eyes on Batman, and occasionally looking to his younger self, who grabs Joker into his arms.

"If you won't kill this psychotic piece of filth, I will!" Younger Jason lifts the gun in his hand to point it at the Joker's head, "If you want to stop me, you're going to have to kill me!" He screams as tears flow down.

Jason quickly signals to the rest of the Outlaws to quickly get out, confusing them even more.

They comply as they meet Jason, who's looking at the warehouse from a nearby warehouse, Roy asking what the hell is going on and why he isn't doing anything.

And in the next moment, the Joker is thrown out of a window with Batman following behind. They quickly look at Jason in confusion about why he isn't coming out, and then the warehouse explodes.

Jason looked at the scene with a blank expression until he scoffed, muttering that "Of course I'm the only one who'd save himself." And then he jumps down back towards the warehouse.

The Outlaws follow behind, their expressions showing how saddened they are at the fact that no one but Jason himself ever saved him.

They had been told once that during a confrontation with Bruce, Jason had woken up stitched together with care instructions. He didn't know who it was, but he was grateful to them, even if it turned out not be Bruce who did it.

But now seeing it in live action, Jason saving his younger self? It both saddens and angers them.

How dare Bruce abandon his son, for a fucking clown no less!

Roy had to calm Kori down whoo was so close to combusting, going after said man herself.

Luckily, Jason soon rushes out with his younger self in his arms, bandages around his neck. He manages to tell the two that he's going to one of his safehouses to properly help his younger self

-

After arriving at his safehouse, Jason quickly gets to work, ordering his fellow teammates on what he needs and where it is.

During this, he starts to sanitise himself, getting out of his Red Hood attire, pulling his sleeve up and rubbing a spot of his arm with rubbing alcohol.

Kori comes back with the equipment, and Jason grabs the needle, unwrapping it. He then sticks it into his arm, as Roy connects the end of the needle to a tube which leads to a sterile bag. Roy then connects the other end of the bag to his younger self's arm, and they all watch as Jason's blood slowly leaves him.

Jason then asks Roy if he could stitch his neck back together while he writes the care instructions. Roy nods and gets started by unwrapping the bandages and picking up the needle with Vicryl suture, and starts stitching.

-

After 30 minutes, Roy finally finished stitching younger Jason's neck.

Before, the younger man looked as pale as a corpse, but now, he looked like a proper living being.

Jason smiles sadly as he takes the blood transfusion needle out of both his and his younger self's bodies, putting the used equipment into the bin.

"We should probably go now, don't want to be here when he wakes up." Is all Jason says before leaving.

Roy and Kori look back and forth from their Jason and his younger self before ultimately following their Jason.

But not before kissing the forehead of the younger Jason, saying that everything will be alright once he wakes up.

They meet up on another roof of a building, Jason sitting at the edge looking out into the distance.

"Sorry you had to see that." He says without turning back.

"Do not be sorry, friend, we are just glad that you survived," Kori says solemnly, floating towards Jason, sitting down beside him and enveloping him in a hug.

Roy follows suit, sitting on the other side and also hugging Jason.

Jason leans into her hug, "It's just- I get that no one wants to save me, but seeing it for myself?" Tears flow down his cheeks as he brings his hands to his eyes.

"Hey, we would always try to save you, Jaybird. The others don't realise how good of a person you are. You deserve better than them."

The three stayed in their hug for a while longer until they were blinded again by a sudden flash.

This time, Jason just smiles, knowing that at least there are two people in this world who would bother to save him.

Chapter Text

The bomb ticks as Jason struggles to keep the blood in his neck.

He falls to the ground after Batman threw a batarang at him...

Just before the bomb explodes, from the corner of his eyes, he sees it.

Batman picking up Joker and jumping out the window, not looking back even once...

And then the bomb explodes.

-

The next time Jason wakes up is underneath the rubble.

Having to claw his way out.

Just like when he woke up in the coffin six feet under.

He lies there for about, not bothering to move to free himself. Tears upon tears continue to flow from his eyes.

Jason had to accept it now.

Bruce chose the Joker over him.

Bruce chose his son's murderer over his son.

Not only did Bruce slice his throat, but he fucking saved the goddamn clown.

Bruce didn't even bother to come back to check for him, seeing as he was still underneath the rubble.

Jason could only laugh.

Bruce once said that actions have consequences.

And he's right.

Actions do have consequences.

Jason slowly raises his hand to his neck, no longer bleeding.

Jason wonders how he's even alive right now; it just shouldn't be possible.

But then again, he did die and come back, so maybe this is just another weird thing about him?

Jason sighs as he slowly starts to move all the rubble off of him.

-

It's been a few years since then, and Jason...

He's slowly been reintegrated into the family, and he's somewhat getting along with the others.

However, whenever Bruce is in the same room, he goes dead silent, eyes becoming ice cold with no warmth inside them.

The others try to tell him to loosen it up, that Bruce grieved and changed after he died.

All Jason says in response is, "I know."

And he truly does, he knows that Bruce had changed. Choosing to kill Jason instead of his son's murderer.

To Jason, Bruce no longer considered him his son.

After all, why else would he throw a fucking batarang to his neck in order to save the Joker? Why else would he save the Joker from the explosion, not even looking back at Jason, who was bleeding out of his neck and on the ground?

Just like how Bruce no longer considered Jason his son, Jason learnt that Bruce was and will never be his dad. A real dad would have avenged him, just like with Felipe and Jose. Bruce even said so, that actions have consequences.

But Bruce chose the clown instead of him. Therefore, Bruce evidently did not consider Jason as his son.

"No, you don't understand, Jase!" Dick yells, ruffling his hair in frustration.

"He was near suicidal, taking lunch after lunch that he could've dodged."

Jason just looks at Dick with a flat expression, "And? So he decided to beat petty criminals to the point of hospitalisation instead of properly processing his grief? So what?"

" 'So what'...? What do you mean "so what'?! He lost you, Jason! Don't be so cold to him!"

Jason just scoffs, "So? To him, I'm no longer that little boy who followed him around in scaly panties and therefore doesn't deserve any kindness."

They look at Jason suspiciously, "What do you mean?"

Jason just shrugs, "As I guessed, daddy dearest kept it a secret from all of you." He says mockingly.

"Hide what?"

Jason just looks at them before standing up to leave. Dick tries to stop him, but Jason manages to free himself.

"If you want to know, just search for the footage 4 years ago on this day." And that's all he says before leaving the room.

Chapter Text

Bruce made his choice...

When Jason saw the glint of a batarang, he knew that his supposed 'father' had chosen the clown instead of him.

In that moment, he thinks about dodging it, but in another moment, he thinks about being hit by it.

Being killed by the man who was his dad once upon a time, who also had a no-kill rule. How ironic.

Too deep in thought, Jason didn't see Batman throwing the batarang, instead feeling it.

Slicing his neck, blood spurting out, his grip on Joker releases as his body falls to the ground, hands grabbing his neck to stop the bleeding.

'ahh- this is how I'll die again, and by Batman of all people...' is what Jason thinks as Joker manages to set off the detonator for the bomb.

From the corner of his eyes, Jason could see Batman jumping out the window with Joker in tow.

Jason could only laugh at that as his second death arrived.

-

Jason's body feels heavy, but he's awake to know he's still alive, somehow.

He opens his eyes to see rubble all around him.

He spends the next while just lying down, not bothering to move, just- taking the moment in.

And if Jason had to guess, the number of times he stopped breathing happened quite a few times, as evident with how many times it felt like he lost consciousness before starting to move, to claw himself out.

It took time, trying to dig himself out.

It was as if he was back six feet under, clawing his way out, dirt and worms falling into his mouth.

Just like then, the dust from the rubble continued to make its way into his throat, making it hard to breathe.

Just when can this pain end?

His hands bleed from trying to move all the rubble out of the way.

One moment, Jason's digging, the next he's on the ground, his wounds mysteriously healed. He gets back to work.

He continues this for a long time.

Dig, die, dig, die.

On and on and on.

Rinse and repeat.

After a long time, Jason finally, finally managed to get out.

He doesn't stop to rest, immediately fleeing the sight. He doesn't want to risk being found, especially by Batman.

-

Since then, Jason took to travelling, going from place to place, stopping any crime he sees, killing any criminals that show no remorse for what they've done.

Sometimes he'd bulldoze his way through, not caring for the wounds he accumulates as long as he gets rid of these criminals and makes sure the victims are safe.

And seeing their relieved faces after hearing the criminals were dead?

It made Jason happy, as if he once again found his purpose in life.

He continued doing this until he heard a rumour that Roy Harper was being held in a Quran military.

Deciding he had nothing better to doand that Roy would do good if he was free, decided to jailbreak him.

He managed to escape with Roy with the help of Koriand'r.

And thus, Jason found two new teammates, Arsenal and Starfire, and they formed the Outlaws.

It was good. They were doing well.

Taking on missions to erase the scum of the earth, but...

At some point, it seemed that both Roy and Kori would look at Jason with concern, especially whenever Jason took too many injuries during a fight.

Jason shrugs it off, saying that everything was fine. That he was immortal, so even if he did die, he'd just come back.

Roy and Kori shook their heads, telling Jason that that thought process wasn't okay and that it pained them to see Jason so reckless with his life.

Jason, not wanting his two friends to be upset, nodded his head and agreed to tone it down.

And honestly? Jason truly stuck to his word, minimising his injuries.

Making sure that he wasn't too reckless

-

The Outlaws are having a sabbatical, going their own way for a bit.

Kori went back to Tamaran, and Roy went back to Star City.

This left Jason alone.

He didn't know what to do, go back to travelling by himself as he did before forming the Outlaws? Or maybe going back to Gotham?

He sighs as he starts travelling, his answer obvious.

-

Red Hood was staring into the distance as Nightwing appeared behind him.

"What do you want, Big Bird?" He asks without turning around.

"Please, come back Jason, we all miss you..." Dick- not Nightwing, pleads.

Jason was thankful he had his helmet on, because otherwise Dick would be able to see his saddened expression.

He turns to face Dick, "As long as I don't see or talk to Batman, I- I think that should be fine."

Dick looks at him, confused for a second before agreeing, it doesn't matter as long as Jason comes back to them.

And thus, Jason slowly reintegrated into the family.

He never got too close to any of them, always having his guard up; he can't afford to let them in only to betray him later. He's learnt his lesson on that already.

-

Like all unfortunate things, Jason was now on talking terms with Bruce, or at least during missions.

Through their comms, Bruce would order all of them to do this and that, and Jason, of course, was included.

And, as if regressing, Jason started to become reckless, uncaring for his body.

His sibling is about to be hit? He'd take it instead.

His sibling is about to be shot? He'd take the shot.

Anything that could harm his siblings, he'd take it instead with no hesitation.

Even when fighting against others, he wouldn't dodge or block the attack, and instead took it as he would retaliate.

And no one said a thing about it, how Jason should stop this carelessness. And so, Jason thought it was fine that they'd prefer if he were the one to be hit instead of the others.

-

It all came crashing down one night when Jason got fatally wounded, a guaranteed death. And yet, Jason got back up with no scratch or injury in sight. Continuing to fight as if nothing happened.

The bats that were there that night were horrified.

How could Jason just brush something off like that?

And so, they decided to confront Jason about it, question him on why and what happened.

Jason simply replies with a shrug that he can't die. Nothing else, as if that explained everything.

Dick yells that that wasn't okay or normal, that one of them wants Jason to sacrifice himself.

Jason just looks at Dick, nodding, but they could all see it.

Jason didn't believe him.

Jason didn't believe he had any worth except for using his body to keep others alive, even at the cost of his life.

Just how can they make Jason believe that they don't want him to die or take any unnecessary risks?

Chapter Text

Jason is a stress baker; everyone knows this.

But he also does stress carvings.

He buys a range of fruit and will carve something into it.

And when he's royally pissed off, he'll carve whatever pissed him off and then cut it up into tiny pieces to eat.

It's like shooting a target with a paper of someone you despise, but a lot less violent.

Plus, Jason loves eating fruit, so it's a win-win.

And sometimes, if Damian, Steph, Cass, or Duke are nearby or are with him as he carves the fruit before cutting it up, he'd offer them the fruit to snack on.

For Dick and Tim... Well, they can just buy fruit if they want to eat them.

Chapter Text

After being submerged in the Lazarus Pit, Jason would often lose consciousness, green clouding his vision and doing whatever it is he desires.

Sometimes it'd be finding someone he trusts and crying his eyes out to them. Other times, Jason would mercilessly torture his LOA associate teacher after finding out the horrible crimes they had committed without remorse.

Jason always ends up smiling at the end as their blood sprays all around him, faces coated in fear.

Jason knows it's wrong, he hates it afterwards, but- it's just that he feels like he's making a change in this corrupt world, getting rid of the worst of the worst. And whenever he finds out how horrible his teacher was, he becomes so enraged and full of hatred, thoughts on making their death as painful as possible, and the next thing he knows, he already executed those thoughts.

It became so common that Jason slowly stopped feeling remorse for killing those scumbags. As long as he can prevent future victims from being created, what's a little bloodshed, amiright?

-

But, well, he heard and saw the news...

That Joker was still well and truly alive, with another kid in the fucking costume he died in...

How could Bruce?!

How could he after Gloria's case?

Bruce once said, "For every action in this universe, there is an equal and opposite reaction. Consequences, Robin. There's no escaping them."

He had assumed that Jason had killed Felipe, leading to Jose, Felipe's father, also dying. It had both angered and hurt Jason that Bruce would ever think that Jason would do such a thing.

But it also told him that a dad would take revenge for his son if they are killed.

However... Bruce did nothing after he died and instead replaced him with a privileged white boy.

Jason was so close to running back to Gotham to beat him up, but he managed to keep his calm.

Since Bruce obviously didn't consider him his son, why should Jason think of Bruce as his father?

He also needs to test the new Robin to see if he's truly worthy of Robin.

And so he starts planning, doing his best to push the green back.

-

He decided the best course of action was to find out everything that happened after he died, from A to Z.

And boy was he shocked.

Not only did Joker have diplomatic immunity, not only did Alfred put up a fucking memorial case calling Jason 'a good soldier' and not 'a good son', not only did Tim take his place not even half a year after his death, not even Dick killing Joker and Bruce brining him back to life, but the amount of victim blaming Jason suffered after he died disgusted him.

Any trace of Jason had disappeared from the Wayne manor, and with it, all his good deeds.

Erased and forgotten, replaced by a cautionary tale on what not to be. But Jason was never like that.

Jason wasn't so reckless that he went in with no plans. He wasn't angry for no reason. He wasn't some innate evil that had to be saved.

It hurt so badly that he couldn't suppress the green, rushing to the All-Castes, to Ducra, tears streaming down his face as little hiccups escaped his mouth

Ducra took one look at Jason's bright neon green eyes and sighed, "Oh, my dear pup..." Taking Jason into an embrace, doing her best to soothe him with head pats like she usually did whenever Jason became like this.

They stayed like this for a couple of hours until the green slowly faded, and Jason apologised.

Ducra just says that he shouldn't be sorry for anything, then asks what happened this time.

"They- they- after my death... I- I thought I'd at least be avenged. Bruce said that every action has a consequence. And yet... Not only did they erase everything I did, erasing my existence, but made me a fucking cautionary tale. Not only that, but they blamed me for dying, saying I deserved it for being reckless, angry, violent, impulsive, just- everything bad..." Tears started to flow down his cheeks again.

"And you know what's worse? It was the new Robin who started it, and yet... Neither Bruce, Alfred, Dick, nor even fucking Barbara ever denied it!" He yells, throat sore from all his earlier crying.

Ducra looked at Jason with a sad face as she continued to pat him.

-

It had been a few days since then, and Jason finally managed to calm down enough to keep the green at bay, no longer crying his heart out from the pain and betrayal.

He had gotten back to tracking Tim and the rest of the bats, trying to find out everything about them, from their likes to dislikes, strengths to weaknesses.

And ho-boy, he found out something even worse than he thought about Tim.

Not only did he start the whole 'blame Jason for his death', but he also had no respect for women.

He had cheated on his partner multiple times and never confessed about it, continuously made sexist jokes, and disrespected women oh so very often.

This time, Jason wasn't blinded with green from the pain of betrayal, but of anger.

He knew Timothy Drake was a privileged white boy, coming from Bristol and all that, but also having no respect towards women? That's a low blow, one that Jason would never cross.

And sure, his parents weren't with him often, but from what Jason could find, they were a loving family, often spoiling Tim whenever they came back.

So the fact that he also pretends to be this neglected kid? It only adds fuel to the fire that is Jason's rage.

With each new piece of information he has on Tim, Jason's hatred grows stronger and stronger.

But he kept his calm, albeit just barely, but enough to think properly.

He was going to give a test Tim, to see if he'd change his ways, and if not...

Well, he only had it coming, right? You can't blame Jason for anything he'd do in the future. It's just like how Jason had his death coming with how he 'acted'.

-

Jason gears up in stealthy LOA gear. His original plan was to wear his Robin suit underneath, but now? Jason found no need; he isn't there to be theatrical, so he covers himself, wearing a blank face mask that gives no hint of identity.

He makes his way through the Titans Tower, avoiding and hacking the security; it's hilarious how easy it was. He then makes sure that all the other members are unconscious long enough to have a 'chat' with Tim.

After Jason makes sure that everyone is fast asleep, he walks up to the man, working on his laptop.

"Hello, Timothy," he says teasingly, "How are you doing?"

Tim jumps, spinning around as he grabs his bo staff to get into a defensive position. "Who are you?!" He asks in suspicion.

"Me? Oh, just someone who wants to know if you're not only worthy of being Robin, but also if you've changed," Jason says with a chuckle.

Tim looks at him, confused, "What do you mean by that, Assassin?" he sneers, having noticed the garbs Jason was wearing belonged to the League of Assassins.

Jason sighs, placing his palm onto his cheek, "You really don't know? Want me to spell it out for you?"

And then Jason takes his palm on his cheek, "Hmm. 1. You decided to become Robin because Bruce was losing it, and you determined he needed a Robin to function, pushing your way into a grieving family. 2. Instead of finding or creating a new name for yourself, you continued to use a costume that a kid died in. 3. Instead of honouring said dead kid, you started to blame him for his own death, saying he had it coming and that it was only natural that he died. 4. You pretended that your parents were neglectful and abusive to you, when they actually showered you with love whenever they came back to see you. 5. You cheated on your girlfriend with Spoiler, never confessing that you did. 6. You continuously degraded women for no reason, showing no respect for them." Jason sighs, "Just show shitty can a person be?"

-

Tim blinks in horror, his face turning pale as Jason lists one thing after the other.

Just how the fuck did this assassin find out? No one should've known; he hid his tracks, erasing them so no one could find out, not even Bruce or Barbara.

He clenches his bo staff, "And what proof do you have of that? If anything, I'd say you're the liar with everything you just made up." He says defensively.

Jason just stares at Tim. "Wow- I sure didn't expect you to be so defensive of yourself. Do you not regret anything you've done?"

"What regrets? I've never done anything wrong in my life." He resorts back with no hesitation.

"..." Jason stands there, looking at Tim, who holds no remorse for anything he just pointed out, and green slowly creeps its way in. He can feel the urge to beat the fuck out of this kid, but no. He holds back.

"I see. Well then, you leave me with no choice." Jason throws a smoke bomb down, obscuring Tim's view.

And when the smoke cleared up, the assassin was gone, no hide not hair to be seen. As if nothing happened.

But Tim doesn't let his guard down, who knows what'll happen next?

But minutes pass, and nothing happens. Shortly after, his friends come up to him, asking what's wrong and why he's so fidgety, all to which Tim says that someone is aiming for him, trying to get back at him for stealing Jason's spot in the family, tears in his eyes.

His friend's eyes soften and look at Tim sadly, telling him that it's okay and that he didn't replace Jason, that he deserves to be part of the Bat-family.

As Tim hugs them, hiding his face into their shoulder, a small smirk makes its way onto Tim's face. It disappears as he lets go, tears replacing it instead.

-

Jason sighs, seeing Tim cry his eyes out to his friends.

So this is what he chose.

Welp, now Jason knows he won't regret what he's about to do.

-

Jason starts pulling all the evidence he's gathered, putting it in chronological order, just to show that Tim was being manipulative from the start.

As he was finding more and more things Tim had done, he found out that Damian was being ostracised by the family.

Although Dick would hang out with the small boy, it wasn't as often as when he hung out with Tim.

After some more digging, he finds out that Damian had challenged Tim to show that he was worthy of being Robin.

But Tim twisted it so that it would seem like Damian tried to kill him, further solidifying his place as Bruce coddled him, instead of his blood son, who was greatly injured. Since then, it appeared that Bruce, or anyone else in the family, treated Damian well.

This royally pissed off Jason.

Although he wasn't close to the brat, he still saw him every so often at the league, and Jason couldn't only feel sorry for the boy, being pushed into a position he clearly did not want. Being forced to live in a new country where he knew no one and had no one to rely on.

Jason wonders if Tim ever regrets ostracising a younger boy just because he was jealous that Damian was Bruce's blood son and could potentially replace him, just like he had Jason.

But then Jason remembered Tim saying he had done nothing wrong in his life.

Jason swore right then that he'd bring justice not only to his younger self, but also to Stephanie and Damian, and all the others who've suffered because of that manipulative bitch.

He continues filing away evidence, so much so that it would be hard to defend Tim. Him faking his sad childhood, talking bad about Jason, about Steph, about so many things. Being sexist, evidence of Tim cheating, his expressions after successfully ostracising Damian, and so on.

The evidence was so clear that it was irrefutable. Plus, Barbie would be able to confirm that no Photoshopping or editing was used.

Now, all he had to do was send to everyone Tim knew.

Bruce and all the bats, the Justice League, and his Teen Titans friends. No one will be excluded; they'll all find out, and Jason does hope that they'll punish Tim severely for what he's done. That they don't shrug it off as nothing and continue as if nothing happened.

If they do...

He'll just have to take matters into his own hands and make all of their lives a living hell.

He would struggle a little not to physically torture Tim, but he'd managed, mainly finding psychological ways to torture him. Because, after all things considered, Jason is no longer a hero; he no longer believes in the way they function.

Therefore, he doesn't care how dirty his hands become, as long as he can bring justice to those who can't get it themselves, it's all worth it.

And if the heroes try to stop him?

Well... They'll have a hard time stopping him.

Chapter Text

Jason, who comes back to find that his death meant nothing, that it changed nothing.

And so he plans. He had thought of taking over Gotham's underworld and making Bruce run around in circles before confronting him, giving him the option of his son or his son's murderer.

But he realised that Bruce would never choose him. He certainly didn't after he died, so why would he now?

Plus, during his time with Talia's league associates, he found that he couldn't stay dead, always waking up despite being fatally wounded, which guaranteed his death.

This new knowledge made Jason think.

What if he made it so that they couldn't just glaze over his death? Couldn't just ignore it and had to do something because of it.

What if he got close enough again, made real changes that stuck, only to die in the most painful, extricating way?

Would his death then mean something? Would it finally change things in a positive way? He doesn't want things to get worse.

...

Only one way to find out, and since he can't actually die, he can see the aftereffects. Plus, he can always dig himself out if need be.

Sure, it was traumatic the first time, but he's gotten over it after experiencing it time and time again, and he's become numb to it, just another casual day in his fucked up life.

Chapter Text

Bruce grieved Jason after he died. But after Jason came back?

He did not see that man as his little boy. He saw a murderer. An imposter wearing his son's skin, committing atrocities with it.

His son would never do such a horrendous thing. All the man in front of him is a body without life.

...

Without hesitation, he throws the batarang to save the only other living being in the building, even if it is a rogue...

-

Jason, who was minding his fucking business, just chilling at a safehouse, a book in hand and a hot chocolate in the other, was rudely interrupted.

Jason mentally notes his book page and snaps it closed, placing it onto the coffee table in front of him.

He then turns around, only to see Nightwing.

"Oh-?" He smirks mockingly, "What is the golden boy doing here?"

"Jason- Stop terrorising Bruce." He demands, "He's already suffered enough when you died, he grieved you, isn't that enough?"

And wow-

Dick really had to go there, didn't he?

Jason just looks at Dick, dead in the eyes, saying that yes, it wasn't enough.

Not when he fucking treats him like some evil incarnate, as if the current Jason was never and could never possibly be the small boy who died brutally.

When Jason looks at Bruce's eyes, he sees no warmth like he used to give back in the manor. No, there was no hint of recognition in those blue eyes.

All he sees is a calculating man trying to find a way to take someone inhuman down.

After all, is he truly alive if he already died?

Is he still human after somehow mysteriously coming back to life and then plunged into the Lazarus Pit?

From what Jason sees from Bruce, the answer is no.

All Jason is is an animated corpse; therefore, Bruce can't kill him. Because he's already dead (or was dead).

Maybe that's why he stopped looking for love in a man who clearly denies the possibility that his dead son came back riddled with trauma, screaming for help and to be heard.

So yeah, he messes with the old man.

But so what?

Jason, not bothering to tell Dick the proper reason (the man would just deny everything, repeating that Bruce broke down and grieved his death, stupid things like that), so he grabs his guns and starts shooting.

Dick retreats back to the entrance he came through, pushed by the clear warning shots that tell him that if he dared to say or try anything, he'd have a body full of bullets.

Gritting his teeth, Dick flies, and Jason sighs in exhaustion.

Now he has to burn this safehouse down.

And he likes this one; he pouts at the thought.

Chapter Text

The Lazarus Pit takes away something whenever someone is dipped in it.

For Jason, it was his happy memories.

Just gone, vanished.

As if they never existed...

And Jason knew something was missing, but couldn't put a finger on what exactly that was.

That was until now.

He was sitting on the couch at the Wayne manor, Dick beside him.

They were watching the skiing Olympics, and Fuck starts talking.

"Hey, remember when we went skiing that one time? Man, it was so funny watching you fall on your face." Dick snorts, a smile on his face as it turns nostalgic.

But for Jason?

He was just confused.

"What ski trip?"

And Dick looks back at Jason, trying to see if he was joking, but only saw genuine confusion on Jason's face.

"Don't you remember? We went on a trip a few years back when you were Robin. We even have a Polaroid, let me go get it." And with that, Dick stood up and exited the room, most likely to go to his room.

Jason just sat there, still trying to process this new information. He- he went on a trip with Dick? Nothing comes to mind.

All he remembers is Bruce and Dick arguing about this and that.

How Dick never looked happy when he was at the manor. How he only saw Dick when he visited as well. He remembers Bruce saying no when he said he wanted to visit Dick at the Titans Tower.

So what Dick said must obviously be a lie...

Right...?

After a while, Dick comes back, a photo book in his hand, he rushes to where Jason was on the couch, sits down and opens the book to where the Polaroid of the two were.

And Jason is just stunned, he looked at both of their younger selves, who are smiling and huddled together.

What is this?

"I- Are you sure you didn't fake this? Because I sure as hell don't remember this happening." Jason says as if he couldn't believe such a thing was possible.

"Of course it's real, Jason!? Do you really not remember?" Dick looks at Jason, concerned.

"What about the time I taught you how to do a quadruple backflip?"

Jason just looked at him with a puzzled expression.

"You never did that for me," Jason says firmly, as if it were the truth.

This turned Dick's expression darker as he continued to name moments again and again in hopes that Jason remembered at least one of them.

"Dick, stop." Jason says, after the nth time, he looked grim, "It's obvious that I don't remember anything you've said. All I remember are the harsh and cruel moments. How you would come back and argue with Bruce before fucking off back to the Titans Tower and all that."

And Dicks face just crumbles, his eyes becoming watery, he wipes a hand to his face to wipe the tears that fall, "How can I just accept that you can't remember anything good from the time you were Robin Jason!" He sobs, pulling Jason into a hug.

Jason sighs as he pats Dick's back, "Hey, it's okay, Big Wing, at least I know that not everything from my childhood was bad and that I actually had a lot of good moments." He says softly, trying to cheer up Dick.

"It's not okay Jason!" Dick yells.

Jason just hums, rocking Dick back and forth, "It is, Dick. I can always make new memories that are full of joy. Remember that time during patrol, when one of the criminals threw a glitter bomb at you, and you struggled to get it out of both your costume and your whole body? Because I do, and I know I was laughing my ass off."

And Jason guesses that that did the trick, seeing as Dick soon snorted at the memory, "It was so annoying. I had to call in sick for work since otherwise I'd be found out with how much glitter I had on my skin and hair."

Jason just smiles, having successfully cheered up Dick.

"See? We can always make new memories to make up for the ones I lost."

Dick just sighs, giving up on trying to change Jason's stubborn mind, instead choosing to snuggle closer to Jason before drifting off to sleep.

Chapter Text

Jason wonders.

He wonders if he'll ever belong to a family without feeling like an outsider.

He once felt like he did.

Then his dad had gone to jail while his mum was lost to addiction.

Sometimes he thinks he never got over it.

How he would put extra effort into helping victims with similar circumstances to his parents...

He misses them.

He misses riding his dad's shoulders as his mum jokes around, a smile so bright you could see it a mile away.

And then he was alone. With no one to protect him.

That is, until he tried his luck with stealing Batman's car tyres. Which, somehow, resulted in him being taken in by Bruce fucking Wayne after taking down Ma Gunn.

And then Jason thought he had somewhere to belong once again.

The kind and benevolent Alfred Pennyworth, and the sweet and caring Bruce Wayne.

He truly loved Bruce like a father, saw him as one.

But then he saw just how corrupt the justice system was, how, despite Batman's goal to stop crime and help victims, they were always too late.

Too late to save anyone, to save Gloria, and this angered Jason.

So when he saw Felipe fall, he didn't feel the need to save him. He deserved it after all.

And yet...

Bruce blamed him, assuming he had killed the man directly. As if Jason had no morals. As if Jason were a born and bred criminal from Crime Alley.

And that hurt more than anything.

To be told that the man whom you viewed as a father assumed the worst of you? Didn't even bother to check up on him after seeing Gloria kill herself? Didn't bother to comfort him?

Maybe that's when Jason started to doubt Bruce.

Doubt whether Bruce considered Jason as a son, like how Jason considered him his father.

So when the day came when Bruce said he didn't need a teenage rebellion, and that he wasn't Jason's father, he wasn't surprised.

He had lately been on his toes, waiting for this moment to come, and now that it has?

All Jason feels is vindication. Scoffing to himself at the thought that he'd finally belonged somewhere. What a fool he was.

So he leaves, not waiting for Bruce to kick him out.

And that's when he learns about the existence of his biological mother. Well, mother candidates, as there were three options, Lady Shiva, Sharmin Rosen, and Sheila Haywood. Although this also meant that Catherine was not Jason's biological mother, but he still considers her his mum.

But... Maybe he could have a mother again? Have someone who would put him first for once?

And so the travels to Ethiopia.

He meets Bruce on the way; he was on the chase for Joker (because why would he chase after someone who isn't his son?), and Jason offers his help.

After trial and error, he finds Sheila, his true biological mother.

He's overjoyed, hugging her at their first interaction, and he just feels so giddy, finally meeting someone who could love him in a world where his dad and mum are no longer.

But then he realises that she was being blackmailed by Joker, so despite Bruce's warning, he heads towards the warehouse where Sheila was smoking. Revealing to her that he was Robin.

And he thought for a moment that his mother would accept his help, she tells him to follow, and despite instinctively feeling like something was wrong, he ignored it, following her inside.

Inside, to where the Joker was. Inside, where he was taken off guard as his mother points a gun at him, selling him out to the Joker.

And all Jason could do was take the beating.

Again and again.

Forehand and backhand.

This went on until Jason passed out.

The next thing Jason knew, Sheila was tied up, and a bomb was ticking down.

He moved, in pain on every movement, but he endured, getting up to untie his mother.

Even if he dies, he'll save his mother.

She asked if he could defuse the bomb, but Jason wasn't sure he'd be able to do it in time, so he finished untying Sheila, helping her towards the door.

But as luck would have it, it was locked.

Jason could only laugh to himself.

Even at the end of his life, Jason truly never did belong somewhere.

He did once upon a time, but that was far too long ago; memories faded from all that happened after.

The timer ticks 00:01, and he jumps in front of Sheila, shielding her, taking on the brunt of the explosion, hoping it'll be enough to save her.

And the next thing Jason sees is black.

Ahh, maybe he'll finally reunite with his mum? He sorely wishes he would.

Chapter Text

To some people, a person could be a hero. To others, the same person could be a villain.

It all depends on the perspective you take, which side you're on.

To the vast majority of Gotham, Batman is a hero, a saviour.

However, to the lower class gothamites?

Batman is the bad guy.

To them, Batman means the risk of destruction, risk of prison, risk of hospitalisation, risk of debt, risk of...

Everything...

Batman doesn't care for the goons he puts in prison.

He doesn't care that they might have a family to support.

He doesn't care if the already poor goon is taking up debt because he beat them into needing medical care.

But for the same lower class gothamites, Red Hood is their saviour. A light in the dark.

He patrols the streets, stopping any crime that occurs. When he beats goons up, it's only those who do crime for the fun of it. If it's a goon who is only doing this kind of work for survival, he'll offer them a job under him.

Sick? Take leave for however long you're sick. Don't feel comfortable doing the dirty work? You can do admin. And so on.

He makes sure victims feel heard, asking if they're okay and offering support if they need it.

Sometimes, Red Hood is caught giving kids candy.

For those in the East End of Gotham, Red Hood truly cares about the people, often putting them first before himself.

Plus, it's obvious that Red Hood comes from Crime Alley with his accent sticking out despite his modulated voice. Knowing that someone from Crime Alley can do good? It gives them hope to live another day.

For those who are middle-class Gothamites? They see Red Hood as a criminal. See him as a hindrance, unneeded.

They already have Batman, why have Red Hood, who does all these horrible things? No way are they liking someone who decapitated eight heads for the fun of it.

Chapter Text

Once upon a time, Bruce was a good parent.

Once upon a time, Bruce took the day off from being Batman in order to look after a sick Jason.

But after Jason died?

That parent died, leaving only Batman behind.

He learnt that he should never adopt another kid and grow close to them.

That's why, after Jason, when Tim, Cass, and Damian came, he always kept his walls up, never letting them get too close and not always treating them as his children.

Sometimes the urge is too great, but then at the back of his eyes, he sees it.

A small boy in his Robin costume, blood all over as he smiles at Bruce, taunting him, saying that he'll always fail them like he failed him.

He can't get too close to his kids, otherwise he won't be able to stand it if they ever die like Jason.

And perhaps... That's why, when Jason came back, he no longer treated him as his child but as his enemy.

Because Bruce, the good parent, died the same day Jason did.

Only Batman was left, and Jason came back as a criminal.

A dangerous criminal, he had to stop.

Chapter Text

When Jason was dumped in the Lazarus Pit, his body wasn't the only thing to change.

The pit had fixed Jason's childhood malnutrition, growing his body to its max potential.

And just like how the Lazarus was golden, Jason's eyes took on the same colour.

Swirls of gold in his eyes that sparkle when the sun hits them.

But that wasn't the only change Jason faced.

His hair, once curly, had straightened out; a patch at the front was white.

In addition to this, his hair sparkled. As if he had gold dust in it.

Even after bathing and showering, it wouldn't disappear.

His hair continued to sparkle, sometimes shining so brightly it blinded people who looked at his hair on sunny days.

Even dying his hair was fruitless, doing nothing to cover up the gold speckled across his hair.

Chapter Text

It was a winter night, snow falling.

In a small library that Jason had managed to build and fund in Crime Alley, he was reading to a group of children.

When he made the place, Jason introduced himself as Peter Jodd.

The kids surrounded Peter, who was sitting on the floor, with cushions all around. And one lucky kid managed to squeeze his way into his lap, another hugging him from behind.

"There is nothing I would not do for those who are really my friends. I have no notion of loving people by halves, it is not my nature." He reads in a soothing voice.

The kid often struggles to stay awake, sometimes with how calming Peter's voice is, but when he gets into character and starts to embody the characters, they're fully immersed, waiting eagerly for the next line.

It's the kids' favourite time of the week, when Peter pops in to visit, reading a book and then playing with them afterwards.

Sometimes, when Peter visits, he brings along snacks for the kids to eat while he reads. He blushes in embarrassment when he admits he had baked too many, his mind on autopilot as he added 3x the amount he normally did, as he gave batches to each kid to give to their guardian.

And it happened so often that the kids were sometimes suspicious of him, raising an eyebrow, is Peter truly that clumsy?

After Peter leaves, the kids immediately have a meeting, discussing ways to help Peter so that he's less clumsy. Not that they didn't appreciate the snacks he made them, but they were worried, okay?!

And Jason, who overhears this, just smiles faintly. Thinking about what snack he should bake next.

-

"Hey Joe," Jason waves to the old man who was sitting on a bench. No one knows his true name, so people normally call him good ol' Joe.

Joe is quite well known around these parts of Gotham, having worked for every rogue there is while being able to survive all of them.

"Jay, what brings ya 'ere?" Jason scoffs as he takes a seat beside the old man.

"What, can't say hi to someone I know?" Joe reaches out his hand and starts ruffling Jason's hair as he smirks.

"Hardy Har Har," Joe says sarcastically. "Got any?" He gestures, chugging alcohol.

Jason sighs with a scoff as he hands a bottle of beer to Joe. "You still teaching the kids how to picklock?" Jason asks.

Joe, who had started chugging the beer burps loudly. He then whips his mouth with his arm as he tells Jason that he is.

"Might as well teach the kids here something useful for survival, god knows they need it."

Jason just nods solemnly, "Yeah, if you hadn't taught me, I sure as hell wouldn't be here right now. But do you still teach them in exchange for drinks?" He looks at Joe with a questioning gaze.

"Damn right I do. I ain't goin' nothing for free" Joe smirks as he chugs the rest of the bottle down.

Jason sighs, shaking his head, a smirk on his face.

-

A cat.

Jason heard the cries of a small kitten from somewhere, and knowing how bad the place can be, he started searching for it.

The meows start to soften, too weak to continue for long, causing Jason to worry a little.

And then he spots it, a small kitten curled up and shaking, behind some trash bags.

He bends down as he starts talking in a soft voice so he doesn't startle the kitten, "Hey, it's okay, buddy, no need to be scared, okay?"

He leans forward, placing his fingers low enough for the kitten to sniff, waiting to see its reaction.

And after a few seconds, the kitten, although still trembling, had sniffed Jason's hand before running its little head against his hand.

Jason slowly picks up the kitten and cradles it in his arms, wrapping it with any extra clothing he has on him before rushing to the vet.

Once Jason arrived at the vet, the little thing refused to leave Jason's embrace, crying out as soon as they seperated.

Jason could only say gently that he's not going anywhere, and it's to make sure it's healthy.

And after an arduous two hours, the kitten was fully cleaned and had a healthy check. Turns out the kitten was a female.

Soon after the vet who looked over the kitten released her from their hands, she ran straight to Jason, climbing all over him until she was on Jason's shoulder, where she curled up against the crevices of his neck.

Jason just sighs as he places a hand on her head and starts petting her.

Guess this is his life now, huh?

-

It's been a few weeks since Jason was forced choose to adopt the kitten, and decided to name her Elizabeth, Lizzie for short.

And ho- boy, she refused to part from Jason and would always hiss at any man who posed as a threat and got too close to him, sometimes even scratching them. For women, she'd simply give the side eye before looking away uninterested, but as soon as a hint of danger came up, she was ready to tackle them.

The only other person she seemed to get along with was Damian, which go-figures.

Chapter Text

Jason remembers everything when he was in a catatonic state.

He remembers the Gotham hospital bed, unable to move, talk, eat, or do anything.

He kept wondering when Bruce would find him and heal him.

Sometimes he'd repeat the name Bruce Wayne over and over again, and sometimes his mouth managed to whisper the word 'Bruce', but it was hardly loud enough to hear, increasing his frustration.

-

Days passed, and Jason was stuck in the hospital, day after day, stuck in his own thoughts.

He heard the nurses and doctors talk.

He heard about Batman and Robin, how they put Joker back into Arkham.

But he was Robin, so what was this?

Jason didn't know what to feel except anger, resentment, and ultimately... Betrayal.

While Jason was such here in a body that refused to do anything, Bruce was out there as Batman with a new Robin, as if he never died.

When a nurse visited him, they noted that a tear had fallen down his cheek.

-

Days turned into months, and Jason had slowly given up on being found by Bruce.

If he hadn't found Jason before, why would he now?

At this point in time, there would be periods where Jason had the littlest not of control of his body.

So when one of those moments came, he fled the hospital. Running back onto the streets until he was back in Crime Alley. Because, despite the dangers, Jason grew up here and knew the safest places. Just anywhere but the hospital.

And so he hid as his body refused to cooperate with him. Kids in similar situations to Jason, before being adopted by Bruce, would visit every so often to look for refuge at night.

They'd see Jason, try to talk, but Jason couldn't respond.

He wished he could, but his mouth wouldn't move.

As if in understanding, a few kids would give him food every so often; this time, it was soup. They opened his mouth and then slowly poured it down, and miraculously, it went down the right tube, and Jason didn't choke.

This would happen every few days since food could be sparse in Crime Alley, and he was grateful he was even being fed.

During a moment where he had full function of his body, some of the kids who would periodically feed him arrived, he moved and said his thanks with a coarse voice, shocking the kids.

It was their first time seeing Jason move, and through his coarse voice, Jason tells them that sometimes his body doesn't listen to him, but every once in a while, it does.

They all nod in understanding.

-

It had been a while since Jason escaped the hospital, and a trafficker had managed to find his hiding spot where the other children were.

Luckily, Jason's body could move, this allowing him to defend this space, and just as he finished the last trafficker, his body froze in place and internally, Jason sighs.

At least it happened after he defeated them all. But it wouldn't be long until they regained consciousness, and Jason was scared about this fact, especially since he rarely regains control of his body.

Then suddenly, cloaked individuals jumped down from above, moving to rid the place of the unconscious traffickers.

Jason was wondering what the hell was going on, but then he heard footsteps, and then a voice that sounded very familiar.

"So this is the boy who had Robin's fighting skills?" She asks one of the cloaked people.

They nod, and she is suddenly in front of Jason, tilting his head left and right.

"How is this possible?" She asks in disbelief, "You should be dead." She says as if it were a fact.

-

And from there, Jason was taken back to the headquarters of the League of Assassins.

And Jason's very grateful to Talia, because without her, he'd still be stuck there in that state of catatonia.

So when Talia tried to tell Jason about Batman, Robin and the Joker, he wasn't surprised.

But he felt his anger reach the limit.

For a whole fucking year Jason was in Gotham, right there for the taking, and yet Bruce had not once found him?

Jason was enraged and could not accept it, couldn't accept being replaced with an upgrade, with his murderer still on the loose, escaping Arkham every Wednesday like it's a joke.

But when Jason told Talia his plans, she tried diverting him; he knew she was trying to distract him by persuading him to take all kinds of lessons from league associates.

And, Jason felt lenient enough to agree. Cause why not?

He'd just be learning more ways to kill Bruce, so at the end of the day, it didn't matter when he killed Bruce, as long as he did it eventually.

And yet...

During his time with the All-Caste, he found his anger disappearing.

The pain was still there, but not as intense.

As if it no longer had any meaning, and Jason felt conflicted.

He remembers the nights when he was unable to do anything, his body frozen in place.

And yet, he could give a fuck about it now, just wanting to be happy for once.

To help others so they don't suffer the same fate as him.

And so, after completing his training, he returns to Gotham.

But not as Red Hood, who he originally planned on coming back as.

But as a nameless person who just wants to improve Gotham and help people in any way possible.

And if some people magically disappear into thin air? Well, Jason hasn't the faintest of clues about how that happened.

Chapter Text

Jason was chasing a mage through Gotham. Just a usual Tuesday night.

And then out of nowhere, he's hit with a bright light, blinding his eyes momentarily.

When he manages to regain his vision, the mage is nowhere to be found.

But then, he hears a baby's cry.

He looks down, and lo and behold, a baby.

No clothing whatsoever, Jason rushes to pick the baby up to keep them warm instead of leaving them on the cold roof. Slowly rocking the baby back and forth until their crying quiets, sleep takes place. Jason sighs in relief before sighing in resignation.

There's no way he's going to find the mage tonight, and he has to make sure the baby is warm and safe.

As such, he trudges back to his apartment. Yes, an apartment and not a safehouse.

Because none of his safehouse are baby safe.

Jason then walks to his bed and wraps the baby in a blanket before strapping them onto him.

He then goes back outside to hit a baby shop.

As he walks, he's deep in thought about what to do next. He can't take the baby back to the cave, risk Bruce or any of the others taking them. He can't give them up to adoption or place them in an orphanage either, he- he just can't. Not with how Gotham is.

And so, he makes up his mind and decides to look after the baby.

But... He'll have to leave Red Hood behind.

He can't put his child at risk; he just can't.

He wants his baby to grow up normal and loved with no risk of danger surrounding them.

He thinks about where he should go because he has to flee Gotham. It's not safe, Bruce would take the baby away from him, saying Jason isn't mentally stable enough to look after a baby, and Jason doesn't want to.

For some reason, Jason just knows the baby is his. Somehow, one way or another, after he was hit with the spell from the mage.

After thinking of all the places he could go without the bats or anyone knowing, he settles on The Chamber of All.

That way, no one will be able to find him, especially not Bruce.

He can simply homeschool his child; Jason is smart enough and knows how to teach kids. He did it with the kids from Crime Alley after all.

And with that, Jason makes up a plan going forward on how he'll get out of Gotham without anyone noticing. He'll also have to get rid of any tracking and communication devices.

He looks down at the sleeping baby in his arms and smiles softly, poking their cheek as gently as possible. The baby frowned a little bit, didn't wake up, resulting in Jason chuckling a little at how cute they were.

He's going to look after his baby, and he won't let any risk come to them.

Chapter Text

Who would've known that being beaten black and blue with a metal crowbar was painful?

With each hit, Jason felt his bones shatter a little more, the pain increasing with no intent to stop.

By the end of the beating, the bomb, Sheila was trying her best to open the locked door, and Jason knew he wouldn't live even if they managed to survive the explosion.

And when the countdown reached 5 seconds, Jason knew there was no escaping, and so, as a last-ditch effort, he threw his body over Sheila in hopes of saving her despite pain coursing through his body.

And in the next second, everything turns black...

-

Jason wakes up gasping; he's confined in a small place with no light, banging whatever is on top. His body feels as painful as it did a moment ago, but where is he?

Is he-

Is he in a coffin? He calls for Bruce, for anyone to help him.

And then he calls down, realising that he won't get help, and despite the pain, he does his best to unbuckle his belt and start digging his way out of wherever he was.

All Jason remembers from that time is reaching the top, wheezing as he tried to breathe in the fresh air.

His fingers were bloodied from digging the mud, nails missing.

And then his memories get fuzzy.

Jason thinks he ended up getting hit by a car...? He isn't sure.

-

The next time Jason could process things was when he was drowning.

Drowning in green, and it burned.

He screams, trying his best to get out of the green as soon as possible.

When he managed to get out, he threw some of the liquid up, eyes glistening with tears.

The pain was too unbearable, causing him to faint shortly.

-

Jason wakes up, a noise disturbing him, and he throws whatever is closest to him at the location of the noise.

As it so happened, the closest thing was a dagger.

This resulted in a person, who was dressed in LOA rogues, collapsing, blood splattering out of his head, with a dagger embedded right in the middle.

Despite hearing this, Jason found that he didn't give a fuck, just happy to not be annoyed by the noise anymore.

-

When Jason first looks in the mirror after his miraculous resurrection (?), he punches the mirror in panic.

Dropping down to the floor, clutching his head, muttering "that'snotmethat'snotmethat'snotme". Tears were building up as he choked out a series of laughs, but only one side of his face moved.

It was as if the receptors for the other half of his face had disappeared, frozen in place.

After he stopped his choked-out laughing, he screamed, but even that was wrong. Too deep for his voice.

His face was too mature, far too old for his age.

His hair, once black, is gone. Now pure white.

Despite not even being related, his eyes that were once so similar to his mum's ethereal blue eyes were gone, tarnished with scheele green. Even the shape of his eyes had changed to raccoon eyes...

His nose, althought was crooked before, was now fully slanted.

His scars, he had received as Robin had disappeared, instead were replaced with new scars he doesn't remember getting.

His body, his hair, his eyes, his nose, his cheekbones, his jaws. Everything.

Everything was wrong.

Wrong wrong wrong!!

There was no trace of his mum, his dad, or even Sheila! As if they never were. As if they never existed in the first place.

This isn't Jason, it can't be!

The person he saw in the mirror isn't him!

But if it was...

Just why couldn't he have at least one thing from his parents?

And the next thing Jason realised was that he was hyperventilating as black spots covered his vision, and then his whole vision turned black, and he welcomed it.

Chapter Text

When Jason looks back, he thinks about how he was able to take over the criminal underworld in less than a month, leading Batman to run on a goose chase.

But... He finds that he wasn't even able to remember something that happened half a minute ago.

He'd been doing his investigation for a mission, and the next thing he had to go over the information again and again and again before it finally stuck with him.

Jason knows this was weird, especially since his memory is normally in pristine condition, even when he hasn't slept for a few days.

So in his free time, he decides to take an IQ test for the fun of it, because why not, and he just felt like he should do it.

And...

It was downright shocking; his scores were way below what he would have thought they'd be.

It just- it just didn't make sense!?

And so he searches online about what could cause IQ to drop.

Lo and behold, "Social Rejection can cause IQ to plummet".

...

Looking back, Jason can think of case after case of being rejected by his-supposed 'family'.

Was that it?

Jason could only laugh to himself as tears prick his eyes.

Chapter Text

Dick should've recognised the signs earlier.

Should've flagged how Bruce took in Jason, not because he truly wanted to, but because he was lonely for Dick left him.

Should've realised after Bruce took his grief out on others, how Bruce punches Dick for even talking about Jason.

Should've seen it when Jason miraculously came back, but was never truly treated as a family member.

He should've realised that all Jason was doing was asking for love and attention in the only way he knew...

And now it was too late.

Too late to save Jason, and now he is lost forever. Just like he was at the prime age of 12, Dick can do nothing about it.

Dick has now lost his brother twice, having not learnt his lesson the first time and doing him better...

Chapter Text

Jason had a thought one day.

Bruce has been adamant on bringing Jason to Arkham and so far, Jason has managed to avoid that, but...

What if he used it as a way to kill the Joker?

He once longest to have proof of Bruce loving him...

But that resulted in bleeding out to death.

In an exploded building while Batman takes Joker back to Arkham.

Ever since he miraculously survived that, Jason accepted that Bruce never loved him, as least, not in the ways that mattered.

Therefore, he won't care for Bruce at all, might even antagonise him on purpose for the fun of it, because why not?

But... He still wishes to make Gotham a better place, to becoming a Batman that Gotham needs. Someone who was willing to stain their hands in red, if only to make it safer.

And what better way than going to Arkham?

Nothing better than going to the place that holds every single rogue that should've been out down a long long time ago.

It's not him who's stuck with them, they're stuck with him.

And by the time anyone realise what's happened, well...

It'll be too late.

Chapter Text

Jason, who curls up at night and cries (he's not lonely).

Jason, who shivers despite it being warm (he's never felt warmth since the day he died).

Jason, who kills in hopes of bettering Gotham (he's rejected from his 'family' as a consequence).

Jason, who acts out as a way to beg for attention (because that's the only way he knows how to).

Jason, who loves the wrong people (he just wants to be loved back, is that too much to ask?).

Jason, who is dead (He wishes he wouldn't ever return, too painful the first time).

Chapter Text

Jason was turned into a cat.

Like every other day, a mage (who would've guessed) decided to take a trip through Gotham and cause mayhem wherever they went.

Jason, being the ever-so-kind man he is, decides to chase him down after finding out he was the closest person to the mage.

And like every old-fashioned story, he tries to talk to the mage calmly, get them to rethink things and get them to come with him. And he has to guess he said something triggering(?) because the next thing Jason knows is that a light is blinding his eyes.

And once he managed to blink the white away, everything suddenly looked a whole lot bigger, as if the city had shot up in size.

But...

Jason felt weird...? Like not in a bad way, just... Different.

He hops out of the pile of clothes he was in, and he can't tell what is different, but he starts walking out onto the street, meowing at the people walking to get them to buy him food.

Some try to get close, but he has this instinctive fear, hissing at them, scaring them off. He meows longingly, sad to see them leave, but he didn't mean for that.

But then one of them came back, a cat treat in hand! Jason rushes up to them, a purr coming out as they open it up and start feeding him.

They once again try to pet Jason, and even though they fed him, he couldn't deal with it, jumping at the touch and then scampering off into the alley, curling up in the red helmet that was between the clothes he was in before.

He stays in a ball under he hears noise coming towards him, an ear flicking up.

And suddenly he's up in the air as the helmet was picked up! Jason immediately jumped out and ran. He didn't know why, but it felt like he should do it. And apparently, the humans didn't like that, with how they were chasing him.

He ran and ran until he was hit by a blocked off alley, a wall in front of him, and humans behind.

He turns, hair puffed up as he misses at them to stay away. There were two humans, a tall one and a short one. One is blue and black, and the other is black with hints of yellow and blue.

The two say something to each other, but Jason doesn't understand. All he wants is for them to go away and let him be.

One of them disappears, the short one remaining, and they take to staying close enough to keep Jason on edge, but not close enough to get scratched.

They pulled out one of those treats hold it out towards Jason.

But he won't be fooled for the second time!

...

Maybe a little won't hurt...? It doesn't look like they want to harm him.

And so he slowly creeps towards the packet, licking the food come out while keeping an eye on the human.

The human doesn't seem like he's going to move. Good.

After finishing the packet, Jason scurries back to where he was before, and once again, the human takes out another packet. But this time, he put it on his finger, the audacity!

But Jason will be kind and not bite him as he eats the food.

After each lick, the human tops up more onto his finger, and Jason was seriously getting a bit lax, but the human won't do anything to him, right?

Wrong.

He picks Jason up too fast to avoid, and Jason does his best to get out, but to no avail. He tried hissing and scratching, but nothing worked; all it resulted in was the human making this noise at him.

And then the human from before came back, and with a cage?! Oh hell no!

Jason increased his thrashing about, doing whatever he could to get out of the small human's hands, but the thing just wouldn't let go!

-

...

He was taken somewhere.

After being injected with something and falling asleep, Jason finds himself in a room, sleeping on a bed.

He immediately gets up and runs to hide underneath.

And then he hears the door open, he was about to run out, but the door was shut too quickly.

The human who had opened the door shook a bag, food?

Jason perks up, crawling close enough to see what it was, but not enough to be seen.

It is food!

He spots the beg full of food, and rushed out underneath the bed to paw and meow at the human to feed him, he was starving!

The human sits down cross-legged and gives a motion for Jason to climb it if he wants the food.

Jason obliges; he's only doing it for the food, okay?!

As he climbs onto the lap, Jason gobbles up the food he was given, and suddenly, there's a hand on his back, and Jason swats at it, hissing but not getting off.

The human gives more food.

Fine, it's acceptable.

And three hours go by, and suddenly Jason's falling asleep, curled up on the human's lap, purring as they pet him.

It's nice.

Chapter Text

'It's fine! I'm okay! The rope won't break, and you'll save the kid, you won't fail.'

That was all Jason was thinking as he was walking on a tightrope.

A bloody tightrope over some very dangerous chemicals, with a crying child at the other end.

He couldn't grapple over the platform, too small for him to, he had to fucking walk the goddamn rope to get to them before grappling to somewhere safer.

As he was balancing on the thing as a rope that somehow didn't snap with his weight, he got the attention of the child, "Hey," he says calmly and gently, "it's okay, I'm going to save you, okay? Just wait a bit, and I'll be right there."

They stopped crying, looking up at Red Hood, who was performing a trick, "See? I'll be right there. This isn't tricky at all, so don't worry, okay? Look, I'll give you some candy once I get there. You like that idea?"

The kid nods, wiping their tears away as Red Hood gets closer to them.

'Just a few more steps, just a few more.' Jason chants inside his head.

And then he makes it, just before the platform the kid is on, he crouches down, still keeping balance as he stretches his hands out, "Ready to go back home with me?" He asks softly, and the kid slowly moves, hesitation showing on their uncertain face.

"It's okay, once I got you, I can grapple us out of here." And the kid nods, now hanging onto Jason.

Once Jason secures the kid in his hold, he grapples out of the place on top of the roof.

He then jumps down onto the ground and slowly places the kid down, "See? Wasn't too hard, now was it?" Jason asks gently in a crouch, holding candy out.

The kid takes the candy, a small smile on their face.

Although the kid wouldn't be able to see it, Jason smiles as well, ruffling the kid's hair, "Let's get you back home now, sound good?"

The kid grins as they nod enthusiastic.

-

Back at one of Jason's safehouses, he places the gift he got from the kid and their family on his shelf next to his other precious objects.

A smile made its way on his face, he's glad he managed to save the kid, seeing them reunite with their family, the mother and father's tears as they thanked Red Hood and would never forget what he did for them.

Chapter Text

"Weren't you ever cold as Robin?" Steph asks Jason, leaning over the couch as he takes a bite of ice cream.

Jason, who was in the kitchen preparing some food, looks at Steph, his expression puzzled. "What do you mean?"

"Like, you only wore the scaly panties, right? Must've been cold during winter," she shrugs.

Jason just laughs, "You really think I'm that stupid? I wore skin coloured leggings."

"No way..." Steph looks at Jason, mouth agape. "Did Dick also do that?"

"Pft- nah, he just wore the panties like the dumbass he is." He says with a snort.

"Holy shit, that was actually a smart idea", Steph says with a laugh.

"Of course! Who do you think I am?" Jason does the dramatic hair flip women do, placing his hand to his chest in pride.

Steph just snickers, taking another bite of her ice cream, "Anyways, when's the food ready?"

Jason sighs, reminded once again of why Steph decided to visit him, "Yeah, yeah, it'll be ready in sec." He says reluctantly, but when he turns around to finish prepping, a smile makes its way onto his face.

Chapter Text

If a lie is spread so far and wide, it might one day become the truth, no longer a lie.

Such is the way of living.

The living can say whatever they want about the dead. They can't defend themselves afterall.

But what if the dead came back?

What if Jason, the dead boy, came back?

Came back from death and saw what everyone said about him?

What if he found out his legacy, his achievements, all the good he'd done, reduced to nothing?

Replaced with the label of being 'reckless, angry, impulsive, violent' and so many labels.

It broke the young boy's heart to see no one stand up for him. To see that no one denied the claims, clearing it up, saying the truth. Not even Bruce...

Why was it his fault for dying? Why was it told as if he had recklessly run into Joker to beat him up?

It's like the saying, "You either die a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become the villain".

Jason had died a hero, but he magically came back to a world that moved on too quickly, to a world that erased him, forgotten him.

If they want to lie so badly about it, why not make it true?

Show them the result of their words.

Afterall, words have consequences. And once something is said, you can't take it back, and Jason is no longer so benevolent as to forgive those who wrong him.

Especially from those he expected to protect his honour after he died.

Everyone had desecrated Jason. Warping everything about him to the point that Jason can't even recognise who they're talking about.

They want to say that it was only natural for Jason to die. His potential for a 'criminal life' is evident in this, even though he was adamant about not becoming one in the first place...

Well, Jason thinks it's quite ironic that he'll become a criminal just to spite them and show them how they've failed him and so many others.

To show them the consequences of their actions.

After all...

For every action in this universe, there is an opposite and equal reaction.

If they want to turn Jason's life into a lie, why correct them? They wouldn't believe him anyway.

Chapter Text

If a goon ever came face-to-face with the Red Hood, they'd know how much the man loved making puns and quips, or just plain making fun of you.

He'd always make a joke here and there as he began torturing a trafficker and whatnot.

And yet...

When he resurfaced after months of absence, he no longer spoke.

No pun, no quips, not even a single hello.

Just dead silent.

And sure, Red Hood was quite annoying at times when he talked.

But when he didn't? Now that was frightening.

He was now like a ghost, his movements silent in the dead of night.

You wouldn't be able to notice he was there until it was too late.

-

"Stop Hood!" Nightwing yells across the rooftop, Red Hood on the other side.

Red Hood pauses, turning to look at Nightwing, but doesn't say anything.

Dick hesitates. Why isn't Jason saying anything?

"J- Hood, stop what you've been doing and come back to us."

But Jason just stands there, silent. It's hard for Dick to gauge Jason's reaction, with a helmet covering his face.

"Say something", Dick pleads. It's weird- concerning, Jason would've at least said something by now, whether it be mocking him or something else.

And in the next second, Jason jumps.

Dick rushed to where Jason jumped from, and he saw no red in sight, no signature red helmet. Just gone. As if he was never there in the first place.

Just what is going on?

Chapter Text

You can do good all your life, and no one will remember, but as soon as you do one bad thing? It will be remembered for eternity.

Jason had thought he had grown up good despite his environment. Fighting for what's right, even when the legal justice system did absolute shit even before being found by Batman.

He had done good as Robin, actually being able to help those in need.

And then Gloria's case happened.

Gloria was gone, and all Jason felt was rage. How could he not? Her death could've been preventable for fucks sake!

And Bruce.

Bruce accused him of pushing that man off. Why would it even matter if he did or didn't? The man deserved it either way.

And yet, it's as if a rift was created between him and Bruce.

As if Bruce became colder, more distant.

His eyes no longer held the warmth they once did, instead turning to ice, like the ones he had when looking at a criminal.

...

Jason did nothing wrong... Right...?

All Jason did was not save the life of a worthless scum who would only endanger more women if he lived.

What he did wasn't bad, right? So why is he being treated in a way that would suggest otherwise?

Chapter Text

"Look, having an abusive dad doesn't exu-"

"Abusive dad?" Jason interrupts Dick, his expression full of confusion.

"Who the fuck are you saying is abusive?" He asks, and Dick looks at Jason, now confused himself, his eyes narrowing.

"Willis Todd." Dick answers without hesitation, firm in his words.

"Willis Todd?" Jason scoffs in surprise, "The man that only resorted to crime to keep me and ma alive?" Jason is appalled at what Dick just said to him, "The only abusive dad I had was Bruce," Jason sneers, "Willis? He was anything but abusive."

Dick looks at him, shocked, "No? I'm pretty sure Willis had abused you, Jason. It's okay to admit it."

And wow- if Dick was trying to piss off Jason, he succeeded, "Are you saying that I'm lying? That I'm tryna cover for him? Well, I'm not. And although he wasn't the most 'present', he did his goddamn best to make sure I lived to see the next day. Not sure I can say the same with Bruce." Jason sneers at the last sentence.

Dick furrows his brows, trying to think of how to respond, "Bruce loves you Jason."

This results in Jason laughing, banging his hand on the table, "Love? Sure, maybe. But he doesn't like me Dickie." He says as he wipes a tear away from laughing so hard. "Maybe once upon a time he both loved and liked me, now? Now I'm just a reminder of how he failed saving me from a life of 'crime' instead of the real reason why he 'failed'.

"Jace... You know he's just emotionally constipated, deep down, he still cares for you." Dick says insistently, as if he were saying it so he himself could also believe in it.

Jason snorts, "What a bootlicker you've become, Dick. 20-year-old you would've never let B become the man he is now." And knowing the Dick would deny that statement, he turns to leave.

Chapter Text

"Everyone else had died once before, so why are you gung-ho about it?" Tim says in annoyance after hearing another joke of Jason's death.

"Why am I so gung-ho about my death?" Jason asks in disbelief before scoffing.

"What, are you saying that my 'death' isn't all that bad because others have had it worse?"

And the bastard actually has the audacity to nod his head.

"You're always joking about your death here and there, but it's honestly gotten a little old. Especially since it's expected in this type of field." He says plainly, as if he didn't just dismiss Jason's very traumatic death.

"... Are you saying you've had worse traumatic experiences than me?" Jason asks quietly, not sure what he's actually hearing.

"Is that not true though?" Tim says, tilting his head, and there's no hint of hesitation, as if Tim well and truly believed it.

Jason clenches his hands into a fist, and his teeth grind. He has to take deep breaths to calm down and stop his blood pressure from rising. He knows the saying that you can't compare trauma, that no one's trauma is worse than the other's, but...

Right now, all Jason wants to do is list every single traumatic experience he's lived through and ask if Tim had experience even half of that, fully comprehends just how fucked up his whole life is, because yes. His whole fucking life, not just a small part, all of it.

He breathes in, holds, breathes out, holds, and repeats the process a few times, feeling his anger subside the smallest amount before attempting to say anything.

"You know... Maybe I wouldn't joke about my death all the time if you guys stopped talking to me about it. Ever thought about that? 'I failed to save you', 'you were so much better then', 'I will always regret what happened', 'if only you weren't reckless, if only you didn't try to beat the Joker', 'my son would never do this', and the list goes on and on. And the way everyone looks at me? With disappointment, with pity, mourning the child that died when said child is right in front of them, very much alive. How can I move forward when I'm being constantly dragged back? It's not as if I enjoy it." He spits out, barely restraining himself from saying even worse things.

"Well, it is your fault for murdering people. It's no wonder they're like that." Tim shrugs, not realising what he's just implied.

And... Something inside Jason snaps.

He starts laughing uncontrollably, resulting in Tim looking at him in both confusion and wariness.

He laughs for a while until it tapers off, more controllable now as he wipes stray tears from his eyes, "Ah yes, so everyone can change with the passage of time, but I, the one who went through being sold out from my mother to the Joker, was beat up with a crowbar, was in an explosion, and died to asphyxiation from smoke inhalation, and then waking in your coffin and having to dig your way out using a normal belt and hands, to being hit with a car and becoming essentially 'brain dead' for two years before being dunked in a Lazarus pit, where you find that not only had you legacy been erased, but even your mere existence was gone, vanished into thin air as if you never existed, and the man who has enough money to change the world did nothing after, instead covered up the crime scene and went on to beating up errand goons into the ICU before another boy shoves his way in and takes up a costume you died in, and then somehow instead of all your good deeds being talked about, it was instead warped, cherry picking instances to turn you into a cautionary tale, what not to be, when you were never those things, at least to that degree," he sneers before talking in a joking manner before carrying on, "and then you also find out that the man who killed you and thousands of others was still free and lose, as if there was no consequence to your death, as if it changed nothing. So please, tell me how I wouldn't have changed after that." He asks sardonically, a smile with no warmth plastered on his face.

"That still doesn't excuse your behaviour, Is all Tim says in response, a frown on his face.

Jason snorts, "This is fucking ridiculous." He raises his hand and runs it through his hair.

He can feel himself being more and more agitated, how someone who is supposed to be a 'hero' casually dismissed someone who clearly has trauma, and by a whole lot. It disgusts him how two-sided said heroes were.

They parade around saying 'justice this' or 'justice that' while sometimes ignoring those who are so deep they can't even ask for help. There's a reason he hates the Bats, parading around with their 'superior' morals and justice while failing to see how horrible they are outside the cowl, not even outside- because sometimes it's when they're in the cowls that they're worse.

Tim tenses, unsure of what Jason will now do. But all Jason does is turn and leave, not a further word with the man.

Tim tries to say something, but Jason just ignores it. There's no point trying to convince someone who will never change their mind, and trying to hurt them? That'd only result in the bats and the birds going after him, and he really cannot be bothered with all of that.

Plus, if Jason said everything he wanted to, he bets that he'd be opening a forbidden can of worms that might finally break him, and he has too many things to do before that.

But as he walks, he scoffs to chuckles sadly to himself. In a normal person's life, they might have one or two traumatic experiences; for Jason? He's only had a select few happy experiences.

He doesn't know how to feel or think about that...

Chapter Text

The timer ticked down.

0:10...

0:09...

0:08...

Jason had accepted his fate, but his body screamed in pain as Sheila tried desperately to open the locked door.

He is aware that Bruce won't come and save them in time. And Jason feels sorry for Bruce, he'll have to see his dead, charred body.

Jason knows that even though he and Bruce had recently drifted, he still loves the man, even after being accused of murder.

Because Bruce is his second father, who gave him a second chance at life. He let Jason help those in need, and he's proud of himself for that, that despite his short life, he's perhaps changed other people's lives for the better.

He hopes the man won't grief to much and gets the help he needs to process it. He hopes that his death will change things for the better, at the very least...

0:03...

Jason leans against a box as Sheila finally gives up, also resigning to the inevitable fate.

And in these last few seconds, with the last of his strength, he rushes to Sheila, trying to shield her from the blast. He knows he won't survive, but Sheila? There's still a possibility she could, and that's enough hope for him; he smiles at that thought.

0:01...

...

It's been a few seconds, way more than 3, and yet, Jason doesn't feel the burning heat, the explosion, not even Sheila underneath him. Just dirt and grass(?).

Jason lifts his throbbing head, black splotches appearing here and there. He sees no crates, no door, just nature...?

Huh?

Was he sent to heaven already? Must be lucky he didn't feel the explosion. But why did he still feel pain? Shouldn't it have disappeared after dying?

And then a voice calls out, "Jason Todd of Earth, you have the ability to instil hope." He looks up, narrowing his eyes, trying to find who just spoke to him.

And that's when he spots it, a floating blue ring, with Blue Lanterns(?) chasing after it...?

"Huh...?" His voice cracked in confusion as a cough tried its best to escape, but before he coughed himself to death, his whole view turned black.

-

Jason wakes up.

He doesn't open his eyes and doesn't move, keeping his breathing pace the same as a sleeping person.

He doesn't know where he is and doesn't want to risk it, looking to analyse what is going on before doing anything.

Was he currently kidnapped? He hears the methodological beep you commonly hear in hospitals, hushed murmurs talking about how strange this whole situation was. How an Earthling had been teleported by the blue lantern ring of all things to Odym and was in such a state.

Okayyy, so he was in what? The Blue Lantern Corps headquarters and a Blue Lantern ring chose him?

Yeah, no, Jason is totally not freaking out or anything like that. Bruce would always say something mean about the Green Lanterns, especially Hal, but when Jason met the guy, he was really fun to be with.

He mentally shakes his head. Adults, amiright?

Anyways, he remembers in passing about Hal talking about this and that, how there were different types, like the Green Lanterns, Violet Lanterns, Red Lanterns, Blue Lanterns, and so on and how it was so annoying fighting this one dude, he can't remember his name though.

But he did mention that the Blue Lanterns were great allies and could be trusted, so he slowly opens his eyes and motions to sit up.

But as he did so, his body screamed in pain, and he flopped back, not wanting to overexert his body more than it already was. And that was enough to let the two individuals who were also in the same room know he was awake.

They wal- float(?) over to him, and he sees two small blue, what was it again? Mal, Maltese? No, Maltusian, that's what they were.

"Jason Todd of Earth," the man says, and Jason nods.

"It appears you are healing quite quickly. That is good. And seeing how the ring chose you, we have no doubt you have the potential to become a Blue Lantern and are filled with hope, but we will have to check to see if it is true. After you have healed, of course."

Wow- him becoming a Blue Lantern? That's so sick! He nods in understanding, and they soon leave, leaving Jason with his thoughts.

-

It took a while, but eventually, Jason was healed enough to walk around with no support needed; alien tech does wonders.

Anyways, the two Maltusians arrange a meeting(?), well anyways they're sitting at a table, and they started asking Jason about what being a Blue Lantern would entail and what his new responsibilities were.

And Jason, although Jason was so pumped to become a Blue Lantern, he suddenly remembered about Earth, about Bruce, Sheila, and... The Joker, he scrambles up and asks in a loud voice about Earth, what happened, if Sheila was safe, and if Bruce was okay.

Sayd and Ganthet -the names they told him- shook their heads, not knowing what happened before he was teleported here, but if Jason was willing to become a Blue Lantern, he would be able to travel back to Earth, to whatever troubled him. But it would have to be after training and controlling his new power, which may take a while...

Jason...

He hesitates for a second; he wanted to leave immediately and see his family. But realising that he had no other choice, he looked down dejectedly before, ultimately, determination filled his face, agreeing to become a Blue Lantern.

He can only hope that everything will be fine by the time he gets back.

Chapter Text

Most criminals aren't born, they're created.

And perhaps, that is the problem in society.

People see criminals as villains, the devil incarnate, an outsider, not human.

They only see the horrors they've done and refuse to think about why.

They don't think about what happened during childhood that may have impacted them to become who they are now.

It doesn't excuse or justify their actions, but at least makes it easier to understand them, see them as a human and not a monster.

And maybe, maybe it's because they reached their breaking point and snapped?

But who knows?

No one cares.

No one cares about the villain. No one cares about bad people.

Because they aren't human.

That's why it's fine to say crappy things about them, to say they deserve everything bad that happened to them, that they should feel remorse and guilt for what they've done, that they should just die and stay dead.

People don't care if the criminal was once a good person, doing good deeds after good deed.

All they care about is that they did something bad and have to be punished severely for it. They don't care how it affects the criminal, because it doesn't affect them.

They don't care that their actions break a person in the worst way possible.

Some physical wounds heal, but mental wounds? They seldom heal, always a whisper at the side of their ear, telling them that they're not human, that they don't deserve compassion, that...

No one is on their side.

And the people closest to them? Maybe they're dead. Maybe they also agree, criticising the criminal, ostracising them, demeaning them, beating them up despite them trying to do better, to do good once again...

But these things build up until eventually...

It's like a glass being filled, drop by drop.

The contents increase as time passes until finally, the glass breaks.

And there's no fixing it.

It's broken, never to be the same again. Even if it's fixed, it'll always have the cracks...

But this isn't about glass, now is it?

Chapter Text

Jason finally being happy with the outlaws, having cut ties with those from Gotham.

Nothing wrong, nothing bad. Just pure happiness. Everyone, Jason included joking and teasing each other, with no worry in the world.

...

And then he wakes up.

Alone.

Tears fall down his face, his longing to see his friends, just one more time...

That's all he so desperately wants. To see them...

But nothing good ever happens to Jason.

Chapter Text

Orv concept where like half of Jason stayed dead- the Jason that had the happy and caring Bruce. The Jason who went helped the Titans and the Justice League. The Jason who forgave Two-Face for killing his dad. The Jason who was looked after by Bruce when he was sick. The Jason who went on a ski trip with Dick. The Jason who was being taught by Babs.

All Jason remembers is Bruce's coldness, the way he accused him of murdering someone. Of failing the victims time and time again. The cold shoulder Dick and Babs give him. Bruce nearly murdering the Joker for turning Catwoman back into a rogue. Bruce benching him from the one thing that has him purpose in life. Bruce himself saying he wasn't Jason's father and to stop his 'teenage rebellion'.

Chapter Text

The residents of Crime Alley have a common nickname for Red Hood aside from the Dammned Prince of Gotham, the Gentle Bear.

For he won't hesitate to use force if it's to protect those he considers his own.

And yet, despite this aggression, he's a pushover when it comes to kids, often giving them sweets when he thinks no one is watching, teaching them this or that, giving them supplies to survive when he can. The list goes on and on.

Sometimes, during a meeting with his people, he'd have one of his employees kid on his shoulder, other times he'd be carrying a baby, rocking it back and forth while humming the common Crime Alley nursery rhyme.

Those who see these scenes always end up smiling. Not only are they grateful to Red Hood for essentially saving them from having to work under other rogues, but he even gives them all the employee benefits! Insurance, sick days, holidays, all that stuff.

Really, Red Hood is such a big, gentle guy.

They sometimes even forget that Red Hood is dangerous when enraged, seeing him mercilessly kill someone for harming his people, kidnapping, or trafficking people.

Sometimes, they're grateful that Red Hood is on their side, given how ruthless he can be.

Chapter Text

When something is repeated over and over, it slowly becomes the truth, even if it wasn't.

Ever since Jason reintegrated with the bats, he's been caught talking about himself in a concerning way.

'Damn right I should've stayed dead', this, 'yeah, I know I'm a useless piece of dirt' that. They see Jason saying this, but don't say anything; he's just being sarcastic.

Right?

But then one day, during a debrief where something wrong happened, and Bruce was 'scolding him' about how reckless he was and that he's learnt nothing since being Robin.

Jason just scoffs, "Okay, and? I'm a reckless piece of shit that should've stayed in my grave, nothing new about that, why didn't you consider that when I joined in on the mission?" he says, rolling his eyes as if he said nothing wrong.

Bruce replays the sentence again and again in his head as horror takes place, "No- Jason, why would you think that?"

Jason just shrugs, "Well, it's the truth, isn't it?" And after saying that, he walks away back to one of his safehouses.

-

It's been a few weeks, and Bruce has been trying to 'fix' Jason desperately.

To correct his mindset, tell him that he was never like that, that he was a good kid who helped so many people, that his rushing to Joker was not his fault, but to no avail. The damage had been dealt, and there was nothing to take it back.

Jason refutes Bruce time and time again, saying, "No, it was my fault, no need to try to make me feel better by lying."

Nothing could be fixed. There is nothing that could change Jason's mind about himself, and now?

Now, all of them have to suffer the consequences of their actions- of talking badly about Jason, being a bystander and not refuting when someone said the wrong things about Jason.

Chapter Text

Even from a young age, you could tell what the young boy was thinking by simply looking into his eyes.

During school, it'd sparkle with joy. The eyes that showed the beautiful ocean would have eyes as bright as the sky. Sometimes they'd even hold the galaxy in them. His mum, although sometimes not fully present, would always tell the boy how beautiful his eyes were, that he was the best thing to come into her life.

A few years had passed, and the boy's mum died, his father had also disappeared, either staying in prison or died somewhere, the boy doesn't know.

The boy's once shining eyes dimmed, no longer having the magic they had. He had to resort to a life of crime to survive. The boy didn't want to, but he had no choice.

That is, until one day when he decided to take the risk and steal the tyres of Batman's car. The boy has successfully gotten three of the tyres; he knew one more might be too risky, but four tyres sold for more.

And as he went back for the last one, the boy was caught red-handed by Batman himself, in all his glory.

With some miracle, after being dropped off at a school, which turned out to be a criminal enterprise?? And with the help of Batman, the two caught MaGunn and stopped her heist. And afterwards?

Batman himself offered to take him in.

The boy's once dim eyes started to shine once again as he put on a costume of hope, of justice.

But nothing good lasts, and the boy started to doubt Batman's methods. Were they truly effective? Were they truly helping the victims?

And after an incident, Batman accused him of pushing a man to his death.

Batman had no trust in the boy, and the boy who received this distrust felt so many emotions: confusion, betrayal, anger, and fear. What will happen to him now?

Will he be cast out, back onto the streets?

His eyes once again started to dim, turning into a void that would eat you alive.

-

The boy found out the truth of his birth, that his mum wasn't really his, that someone else had birthed him. Maybe...

Maybe she'll care about him? And this he sets off to Ethiopia. However, his eyes were still as void as they had been of late.

-

It was a mistake; the boy never should have hoped. He should've learned his lesson to stop being so trusting.

The timer ticked down one by one. Each bruise comes to life ever so slowly. And despite this, the boy tried to free his mother's binds.

He knows he won't survive, but his mother? There's still a chance, and that chance is worth taking.

The timer ticked and ticked, and the boy looked back and saw a few seconds remaining.

In a last-ditch effort, he flings himself over his mother.

Ahh... Maybe he'll see his mum in heaven? She'll tell the boy how brave he was, tell him how beautiful his eyes are, and that he was her little munchkin.

And then the world turns black.

-

The boy gasps, his body excruciating with pain.

He's lying down in new clothes and in a cramped space with soft, fabric...?

He bangs the top, yelling for help as he panics before forcing himself to calm down.

He starts to dig, dig his way up, and that's the last thing he remembers before his whole vision turned gold.

-

It's been a few years, and the ma-boy, he's still a boy, has finally arrived at his birthplace, Gotham.

All to see how much he mattered to Batman. To ask him to put him before his morals for once.

-

It's finally happening. The boy lured Batman to where he'd confront him, but in the process, he had gotten beaten up badly.

His helmet had blown up when he set it off earlier, and his eye mask was now half gone, ripped off sometime during their game of cat and mice.

And what Batman saw in the boy's eyes was a quartet of colour, blue, red, grey and black swirling together but never mixing.

It had changed to orange for a second, green another, but it ultimately turned back into the quartet of colours it was before.

And when the batarang left Batman's hand and went into the boy's neck? The colour of his eyes turned completely black, not changing even as the bomb ticked down like some sick twisted joke of the past.

Chapter Text

Jason wants it to stop.

Memories that suddenly pop into his head that he swears he's never experienced. His body automatically moved in a way that was both familiar and unfamiliar. A longing for someone he can't place a name on. A friendship with a detective he knows he was never been friendly with before.

They happened after popping up from his grave, that, he knows for certain.

When he died, he was in heaven, swinging around vines, enjoying life to the fullest.

And suddenly, he was snatched- or at least that's what it felt like. And in the next seconds, he was 6 ft under. Sometimes Jason has the occasional thought that maybe he never should've left his grave, about what his life in heaven would still be like.

He knows he won't be returning there a second time.

-

Sometimes these 'memories' would come through dreams, a sequence of a story playing out. How this woman, whom he called mum, cared so deeply for him, made an effort to put him first, unlike Bruce, who would only focus on his mission. But that can't be right...? His only maternal parents were Catherine and Sheila, and Bruce, although he had his moments, cared for him..?

Other times, he'd see something like a videotape playing when he saw something. One time, he saw two pistols, and an image of the two combining to turn into a rifle popped into his head. He knows exactly how he'd make it and who to use it on...

Sometimes he has difficulty differentiating the dreams and images from reality, from what he himself experienced. He'd once mistaken Damian for a baby version, picking him up and carrying him as if it were everyday life. Much to Damian's bewildered look as he looked at Jason as if he had committed a felony, but not escaping his hold.

Sometimes they'd be vivid: the spiked chair, the drugs, the various Batmans that would beat him up, the torture, and, of course, the scolding hot iron pressing onto his cheek, forever branding him. He always wakes up with a gasp, sweat rolling down his face as he scans the area to check if it's safe. But he knows it wasn't real. He was in a warehouse, beaten with a crowbar as Sheila watched on, before ultimately dying from asphyxiation due to the explosion Joker set up.

Sometimes he'd be lucky; there was this one time when Dick had actually offered to adopt him! He wonders what his life would have been like if Dick had adopted him instead of Bruce. Another was when Dick himself had offered Jason the Robin costume, like a dream come true.

-

Tonight, Jason dreamt of a mother he once had, a mother who took legal guardianship of him. A mother who cared when he got hurt. The dream was about the last time he saw her. The sky was red, and she was determined to fix that, however circumstance lead from one thing to another, and she was dying, a knife impaled into her. She looked resigned, ready to go, until she saw Jason.

She saw Jason and immediately started fighting again, but like every other parental figure, she's on the verge of death.

He carries her to a hot air balloon, tears streaming down his face, he sobs as he says sorry for being late, for not being good enough, for not being a good son, to not leave him...

"Mum- please... be happy..." he chokes out as he carefully places her into the hot air balloon, hugging her one final time before he slowly stands back up and turns the hot air balloon on. As it starts to float, he watches it fly into the hurricane of a sky until he could no longer see it.

But even then, he didn't move, just...

Watching, as if waiting where he was, would reverse all that; his mum would magically come back.

If he knew this would happen, he would've treated her better before, would've stayed with her even if that meant leaving Bruce's side and not being Robin...

Jason misses his mum.

-

Jason wakes, feeling tears fall down his face as he slowly sits up.

Nocturna- Natalia. That's who she was.

Jason doesn't know what he's feeling, but he just wants to see her, even though they've never met in this life.

Maybe... Maybe he should see if he can find her? Reach out just like how she asked him what was wrong when they first met.

-

Today is another day, and Jason could only snort in disbelief at what he saw.

He saw himself in a priest's robe, giving advice to those who come to a church, and giving really good advice, mind you.

The irony is that even when he had no Bruce Wayne to 'guide' him, he still managed to do good.

He thinks, maybe in the future, when he leaves his vigilante life behind, maybe he'll become a priest as well? That is, of course, if he's still alive and kicking by then.

-

It's been ages since Jason first started getting flashbacks(?) of memories, and he's come to realise that they're perhaps an alternate version of him. Him else world. It makes sense, the multiverse and all that bull, so it wasn't that hard to deduce.

He just hopes his other selves get a happy life, free of worry or sadness.

Just like the version he saw, where he was well and truly reintegrated into the family. Was cared for, loved for, and got help and support when he needed it, even if, maybe the Joker was still alive. (That doesn't make him infuriated at all)

But he looked happy, and that's all Jason wants for himself and his other selves.

So maybe these memories aren't such a bad thing after all?

Chapter Text

There was a myth about a mirror.

A mirror that would reflect a person's soul, what they hid underneath. But only under certain conditions.

During a mission, Bruce took the mirror back to keep it in safe hands, but for one reason or another, it was nearly identical to a normal mirror that Bruce had bought recently due to the previous one breaking.

And thus, it was swapped with the normal mirror, displayed in the Wayne library. None the wiser.

-

Years passed, and the mirror stayed where it was.

Years passed, and Jason had come back to the family.

He had compromised everything about himself. His methods, his morals, his views, everything, to be accepted by his family once again.

-

Jason was in the library, the sole solace in the manor where he could get away and spend time alone.

But that didn't last for long, because of course it wouldn't. His siblings started to filter in one at a time, and every time they did so, they always disturbed him.

And instead of having his guard down, relaxing in a place he labelled safe with his family that should feel safe, he had his guard up as if they were anything but.

And for some reason, Jason never put down the tough guy act. Always acting sardonic and hostile, as if he was never hurt by the fact that everything about him was wrong, wrong, wrong.

As if sensing this, the mirror, which usually showed the current look Jason had, started warping. The white patch of hair turns black and fluffs up. The clothes turn into the same costume displayed in a case, locked up in the Batcave.

But...

The boy had a halo above his head and the most captivating white wings behind his back.

Somehow, Jason noticed something was wrong, not just with how he was acting, but this bone-chilling wrong.

He looks around in suspicion before spotting the mirror where his reflection wasn't what it was supposed to be.

His reflection was gone, replaced with a boy now gone, grinning as he waved at him. Jason holds his breath, frozen as he watches the boy.

That- he must be hallucinating, right?! That's not him! That boy is dead and gone! Stuck 6 feet under where he deserved to be!

And again... As if sensing Jason's thoughts, the boy tilts his head, staring right at him with a frown on his face.

Somehow, for some crazy reason, it looked as if the boy was walking to the front of the mirror, touching the other side. Testing the boundaries as he slowly pushed forward.

As impossible as it sounds and looks, fingers were passing through, forming into real living fingers.

Soon, a hand followed, then an arm, and then the body until all of the boy was well and truly out of the mirror.

Now, the others in the library saw what had just occurred, just as shocked as Jason himself.

Frozen in place as if their whole body turned to stone. The boy fluttered onto the floor, as graceful as an angel, as he looked at Jason with the softest expression. One, Jason doesn't think he's capable of anymore.

The angel(?) starts to walk, nice and slowly, before he was behind Jason, where he wrapped his arms around Jason's shoulder and pressed his cheek on top of Jason's head.

"It's okay, everything will be okay. It's fine to be yourself," angel Jason says soothingly.

As if he had hypnotic powers, Jason started to feel his eyelids close until he ultimately fell asleep in the embrace of his younger(?) angel self. With no awareness or caution about anything else.

And all everyone else in the room could do was watch.

Watch as the almighty Red Hood, the Crime Lord, sleeps with such peace on his face as the younger Jason hums a song, stroking his hair.

Chapter Text

Before Jason died, he had scars all over. From when he was homeless to when he was Robin.

But after Jason died? He was dunked in a nice Mountain Dew jacuzzi. And somehow, every scar he got disappeared. His skin was flawless, and even after Jason got hurt during his training, his wounds healed with no scarring in sight.

At first, Jason had a breakdown, wondering who he was now that every tale of his childhood was gone, his accomplishments, his mistakes, gone, without a trace.

But now, he finds solace in it. When he walks the streets, interacting with people, no fear on their faces as he jokes around. Kids aren't frightened and love to bug him whenever they can.

Jason doubts they'd do that if all the scars he'd gotten didn't heal.

Chapter Text

Jaybin suddenly appeared in the Batcave when everyone was there: Bruce, Alfred, Dick, and even Babs! But he saw six other people he didn't know, wearing vigilante costumes. Who are they?

And of them looked scarily similar to Willis, but there were differences. His eyes are too green, too young, and so many other tidbits that tell him that the man is not truly his dad. Plus, Willis is dead... So he couldn't be here.

"B? What's going on? Who are these people?" He asks Bruce. And Bruce just stares at him, shocked.

He then rushes to the younger Jason and kneels on one knee, "Hey Jaylad, what's the last thing you remember?"

"Hmm, we were chasing this magician, and I got hit with a spell cause I wouldn't stop joking around, which angered the magician, I guess." Jason recounts and then pauses, "I'm in the future, aren't I?" He asks.

Bruce nods, "We'll need to find a way for you to go back, but for now, just stay here.

-

It's only been a day, but Jaybin has been absolutely coddled by Bruce, Alfred, and Dick.

However, every time they do, their faces have this nostalgic look with a hint of guilt. He doesn't understand why. The other 'new' members of the family look at him with confusion, suspicious in their eyes as if what they were seeing was something that just couldn't be true.

And then when he looks at his older self, and yeah. Super easy to guess with being in the future and all that. He just looks awkward, holding his arm in one hand and is tense, clear that he wants to leave, but he doesn't.

Something's wrong, and Jason can feel it. He will get to the bottom of it, because big Jason isn't nearly treated as well as he is, and Jason just can't fathom why.

Just what happened to him that cause himself to be so withdrawn from others? Because he sure as hell can tell big Jason still has a big heart, still longs for warmth from family, but big Jason is too scared to show it for some reason.

Chapter Text

"I've been backstabbed, betrayed, bamboozled!" Jason flares his hands around in a dramatic way.

"I can't believe you would do such a thing to me..." He says, wiping his eyes that hold no tears.

"Yeah yeah, get over it, you drama queen," Dick snorts.

"Never," Jason gasps as if offended at the very thought of it.

He raises the back of his hand to his forehead, "Whatever shall I do now? The food I painstakingly worked oh-so hard to get is seemingly in someone else's belly?" He sighs as if truly in contemplation. "Oh, what I sacrificed to get it..."

Jason steals a glance at Dick, who is just watching him, a small chuckle leaving as he shakes his head in defeat, "Alright, I'll go get it. Will you stop being so dramatic now?"

Jason hums, but doesn't answer the question. "Chop chop, time is ticking", he says with a grin as Dick groans before getting up from his position on the couch.

"Whatever you say, your majesty." And with that, Dick gets up and bows to Jason before leaving. When he gets to the door, he can hear Jason's laugh, bringing a smile to his own face.

Chapter Text

Jason, who is a shape-shifter (e.g., any small animal you want), doesn't trust others with this knowledge, so he hides it after his ma died and pa essentially disappeared. He misses them both, but it is what it is, and his crying won't keep him alive.

That is, until he gets picked up by Bruce the Batman??? Wayne. At first, he doesn't trust the man, but slowly, he feels as if he has a second father, and he begins to think he could trust Bruce with his secret. That is, until everything goes wrong, Bruce becomes more strict on him, accusing him of a murder he didn't commit.

He decided not to say anything, and then Jason found out that his mum wasn't his biological mother, and that his biological mother was still alive. So he sets out to find her, because surely she'd love Jason, right?

Except she doesn't, or at least enough not to sell him out to the Joker.

The Joker is beating Jason, and Jason is so close to transforming into (whatever small animal he is), but he holds it in, not wanting to risk the truth being found out, even if he's about to die.

And then the Joker leaves, a bomb counting down. Jason managed to free Sheila, but the door was locked, and there was no escape.

And in this moment, he misses his ma and pa, how they'd snuggle with him whenever he had a nightmare, or when they gently pat his fur when he transformed due to fatigue or was sick.

The next thing Jason knows, he's covering Sheila as the bomb explodes, and slowly his eyes close. Hopefully, he can see his ma and pa again when he opens his eyes again.

-

He doesn't.

The next thing Jason knows is that he's in a small box or whatever, trapped.

He bangs the ceiling(?) screaming for help, before he calms down and digs his way out of a coffin(?) and through mud, until finally, finally, he was out.

But everything hurt...

-

Years passed.

He was catatonic, looked after by Talia until being sent off to the All-Caste. He trained after masters of various subjects, some lethal, some not.

And then he formed the Outlaws with Roy and Kori.

He came to trust the two so much that he revealed his secret. He was scared about how they'd react, but all they did was hug him, whispering kind words, thanking him for trusting them.

And then, as if something clicked, he felt more at peace, finally able to transform, not having to hide himself.

He'd transform whenever they were taking a break or whenever he was extremely tired or injured.

When Jason was fatigued or injured, Roy and Kori would always look after him, making sure he was alright.

Jason, of course, did the same whenever the other two got injured or needed some reassurance; they were like a family.

-

Time passed, and the team took a sabbatical, with Roy going back to Star City, while Kori went back to Tamaran.

Jason wandered for a while until he found two new friends- family, Artemis and Bizarro.

Just like with Roy and Kori, Jason came to trust the two, and he revealed his secret. Artemis would tease him while Bizarro looked happy like always, petting Jason's fur with such delicacy that it made Jason feel so cared for.

-

Artemis and Bizarro were gone, and Jason doesn't know if he'll ever see them again.

Something inside Jason breaks as Batman lands on the rooftop, rushing to Jason to continue their fight.

Jason doesn't put up a fight...

Punch after punch, Bruce doesn't hold back, yelling malicious words, one after another.

All Jason could do was lie there, watching the man who had once promised to protect him break his promise.

Jason wants to cry, to transform back into his animal form and snuggle in the comfort of his family. But they're not here...

Just then, an arrow flies past, Roy, Jason notes.

And somehow, Roy managed to take Jason away from Batman, from Gotham.

With Roy, Jason knows he's safe, and so he transforms into his animal form, in Roy's hands, as tears fall down his cheek.

Chapter Text

Somehow, some way, Jason had been unofficial labelled the black sheep of the family.

'The Robin that came back wrong', 'the reckless Robin', the cautionary warning, what 'not' to be.

And yet, somehow, Cass, Steph, Duke, and Damian had found comfort from the man himself.

-

Cass, although she hated the idea of Jason having- still killing others. She finds comfort in the way that the world is not all black and white. That, yes, maybe Jason has dislikable methods, and she wants him to change them, but he's doing it from a place of love and care. And she can see that, can read the way his body transforms from cold, rigid, tense, to warm and gentle when talking to kids. Always making sure they're doing okay. Maybe- maybe not all killers are bad... Maybe she's not bad...

Steph, the second Robin to die. Blamed for her death, just like Jason. She finds comfort in the fact that maybe there isn't anything wrong with her. That she wasn't at fault for dying. Knowing that no matter what, Jason will always have her back. That if she wants to complain about how stupid Bruce is being, Jason is all ears.

Duke felt comfort in the knowledge that someone understood him. Understands what it means to be a victim of the Joker (even if he wasn't a direct victim) with Babs. Feels comforted that Jason knows what it's like to go from foster house to the next. He feels happy knowing that Jason won't get angry at his quips, no matter how insulting he gets.

And lastly, Damian. Damian finds comfort in Jason in the least expected way. Although he goes to Jason last to ask for advice, it's Jason's advice that he ultimately decides on. Seeing Jason still part of the family despite everything he's done brings comfort to Damian. Because that means that maybe he's still his father's son, still belongs in the family despite the things he did before coming to Gotham.

-

Oftentimes, the four would hang out at Jason's place, helping him cook, eat snacks, play games, or simply relax.

Jason immersed in a book, Damian sketching, Cass, Steph, and Duke watching a movie.

The three watching the movie chat about the plot, but not loud enough to disturb the other two.

When the day turns dark, all of them drift off to sleep. And when they wake up with blankets over them with steaming hot chocolate on the table?

They smile as they carry on with their day, but not without teasing Jason.

Chapter Text

Ya'know, maybe Jason should've expected it to happen one day. He just wished it wasn't now (or ever).

Bruce in all his might and glory, has broken so many of his promises to Jason.

To protect him from harm (he's now the one who deals it).

To bring justice to those who can't bring justice to themselves (and yet he didn't bring justice to his dead son).

The promise of family (and then he was told he didn't need a teenage rebellion, that he wasn't Jason's father).

And now?

He promised he would never take Jason to any traumatising place (he took Jason to the warehouse in Ethiopia, demanding he remember what happened when he died to find clues about how to bring Damian back, punching him when Jason said if Bruce had only asked instead of deceiving him)...

It seems that every promise Bruce has made to Jason is destined to break.

Chapter Text

Jason got mind-controlled, and the batfam tries to get Jason to break out of it, but he's too fast, too agile, too strong.

They thought it'd be relatively easy since they thought they were better than him, but Jason wasn't holding back, going for lethal shots and missing by a hair's breadth.

It was shocking, to say the least. They had forgotten how dangerous Jason can get after seeing him pull his punches for so long.

They had gotten injuries all over, blood escaping from various cuts.

And Jason?

Barely even a scratch.

Not even his gear was dirty.

They have to find a way to break the hypnosis Jason is under, somehow, and quickly. They don't know what Jason is truly capable of anymore, and they don't want to risk it.

Chapter Text

"I need to get back home!" Jason struggles against Nightwing.

Nightwing curses under his breath as Jason scratches, punches and kicks him all over.

"Hey, it's okay, I'll be taking you back, okay? Just calm down a little..." He says as gently as he could.

"What are you, the cops or something?" The boy asks, eyes narrow and voice full of suspicion.

"Something similar, but trust me, okay?"

The small boy in his arms just snorts, "And how do I know I can trust you? God knows you can't trust the police." Jason says mockingly as he finally manages to squirm his way out of Nightwing's hold, dropping to the ground and taking off into the streets.

"Shit," Dick mutters, quickly chasing after the small boy, a hand reaches up to his comms as he starts chasing small Jason, "O, backup needed, Hood's been de-aged and just ran away." He runs after Jason, and yet somehow, each time he gets close enough to grab him, he misses.

"What?" Oracle simply says before the clacking of her keyboard starts up again, "Spoiler is close by, I've sent her to help."

Good, Steph should be good, better than all the others; they'd most likely make things worse, and he really does not need it right now. "Thanks" is all Dick says before turning the comm off again, trying his best to catch up to Jason again, and despite Jason's small size, Dick has nearly lost track of him multiple times. It's insane!

Dick sighs, 'this was not how tonight was supposed to go' he thinks, "Why can't Gotham have a peaceful night for once?"

-

It's been an hour and both Dick and Steph have been running around tifelessly. One moment they see Jason, the next he's gone.

"Goddamnit, maybe we should ask for the others to help as well," Dick mutters.

Steph looks at him, "You really think that'd be a good idea?"

Dick shrugs, "I don't know?! What else can we do? We obviously don't know where he's gone and having more hands on deck might help?" He says, flailing his arms in frustration.

Steph sighs, "Let's go another hour, and if not, we can call for support. I'm sure he doesn't want a horde of people chasing after him."

Dick nods, and the two scatter.

-

A day had passed, and nothing. They had eventually called the others for help. But even then, nothing.

And Oracle couldn't do much, despite Gotham being litteres with cameras, the one place that had the least was of course, Crime Alley.

It should be easy trying to find Jason, but it wasn't. They just had no clue where he was.

Sure didn't help that Bruce was off planet. They called earlier, and he said he was on his way back, but who knows when he'll get back?

-

They searched and searched, a day turned into two, then three, then four, and so on.

By the time Bruce got back, it had already been two weeks. Two fucking weeks of Jason missing, god knows where.

They had to believe he was safe somehow, but they were slowly losing hope with each passing day.

That is...

Until they spotted what looked like a young Jason, out on the streets, not in baggy clothes like he was when he first changed. He was now wearing a hoodie that nearly covered his face and had a tyre iron in his hand.

Dick sighed in relief as he told the others he saw Jason.

He slowly follows Jason, not wanting to scare him, but also not letting him notice and run off wherever he goes.

And uhh...

Jason was stealing the wheels of the Batmobile. Just, wow. Such deja vu.

"What are you doing?" Dick tries to ask in a friendly but he guesses he still scared Jason with how he jumped before whirling around to see him.

Eyes widen in recognition and then narrow, "It's you. What do you want?" Jason sneers.

Dick throws his hands up in a placating manner, "Nothing, I promise. I just, you remind me of my brother's childhood, so I just want to help, okay, and no. I'm not a cop, I'm a vigilante, alright?"

The boy narrows his eyes even further before letting up and shrugs before bending back down to continue stealing the wheel.

Dick takes this as a win and asks what his name is, as if he didn't know, to which the boy responds with, "Jason." Not bothering to look back.

"Cool, and what are you doing stealing tyres, Jason?" Dick says nodding.

"To survive, duh?" And Dick tilts his head. He heard about Jason stealing tyres and all that when he first came to the manor, but never why.

"W-why?" He asks a bit hesitantly.

Jason rolls his eyes and turns to look at Nightwing.

"Can't trust any boarding school, cops or orphanages. So the next best thing is being able to live without them, and you need money for that. Simple as. Plus, Batman's tyres would sell for a fortune."

"And why don't you trust them?" Jason snorts, "You really think they're good? At best, you grow up in a crime-masquerading school, at worst, you'll be trafficked or killed for some insane reason, never to be seen again." He huffs before nuttering, "This is common knowledge..."

And Dick... Sure, he knew he knew it could be bad, but not this bad.

"An- and what about the house, is it safe?"

Jason nods, "Hmm, probably as safe as it could get. It was really dusty a few days ago for some reason, but a little cleaning up and it's as good as new."

"I see. Well... I'll leave you my number, call me if you need any help whatsoever okay Jason? Promise me you will if you get in trouble, or even need money, yeah?" Dick pleads as he hastily gives Jason his number.

Jason nods again. He doesn't know why a vigilante was doing so much for him, and he definitely won't ask for money, but he's grateful someone was willing to help him if he called for it.

Dick internally sighs in relief, "I'll, I'll walk you back home, okay?" And Jason gave him a stink eye, "Ok, not exactly to your home, but the area, is that okay? Just so I know you're safe?"

Jason just shrugs, "Do whatever you want, I guess."

And Dick takes that as another win, a smile growing on his face as he grins at Jason, saying thanks.

Jason quickly takes the rest of the Batmobile's tyres off with the help of Nightwing, who assures him that Batman is rich enough to buy more once Jason had second thoughts after finding out Nightwing was one of his partners.

-

Once Dick walked Jason back to the area where he lived, he brought his hands back up to his comms, "I've interacted with Jason and... Don't rush him or kidnap him back to the manor. I'm taking my time to gain rapport so he can trust us and come with us on his own terms, so no interfering, alright? We don't want him to run into hiding again... And that means you, B, ok? Yes, I know we need to bring him back quickly, but he'd just go into hiding if you force things..." He sighs, "Just... Let me handle this okay? Urghh," he ruffles his hair, "Fine, fine. I'll call as soon as something concerning happens, alright? Cool? Ok Nightwing out." He says as he turns the comm off, sighing as he drags his hands over his face.

He just hopes he can gain Jason's trust soon enough to explain everything.

(and maybe learn more about him and what he was like as a kid).

Chapter Text

After Jason died, Bruce was not the same.

He ran straight into fights, not taking the time to analyse and plan how things would work out.

And become reckless and aggressive, punching even petty criminals to the point of being sent to the ICU.

He never should've taken Jason in as Robin, and now all he can do is bear the consequences of his actions (heh)...

Maybe he'll join his son? He hopes it comes soon...

-

Tim watched the news, how this was the 34th case of Batman sending someone to the ICU.

But it was strange, Robin hadn't been spotted in ages, and Batman had been off the rails lately.

Tim had already known that Batman was actually Bruce Wayne. He found out when he watched Robin perform a quadruple somersault, and he knew of only one other person in Robin's age range who could, Dick Grayson. And from there, he concluded that Bruce Wayne was Batman.

So he searched for any news he could and found out that Jason Todd, the current Robin, had died.

But... He looks back at the TV showing Batman's ruthlessness.

Batman needs Robin.

-

Try as he might, Dick wouldn't budge, refusing to go back to Robin, and Tim just couldn't understand why. Can't he see that Batman needs Robin?

Well, anyway, after some events, Tim dons the costume and heads out to save Batman and Discowing from Two-Face.

He somehow managed to save them, and after forcing himself into Robin's clothes, he's now Robin.

But... For how long? He can see the way Bruce's eyes would look at him, seeing a boy who died, and he would tell Tim that this whole vigilante scheme shouldn't be done by kids.

But Tim wasn't having it. Batman needs Robin. He needs to regulate Batman, otherwise he's afraid he'll just follow in Jason's footsteps...

And so, he had to think about how he could convince Bruce to let him stay as Robin.

-

Tim comes up with an idea. Tim has to convince that Batman needs Robin. And what better way than showing how much better he is than Jason?

He's not reckless like Jason; he won't run towards death like he did. And yes, he knows how Jason died. He rushed to where Joker was in hopes of proving himself and died because of it.

Tim won't make stupid mistakes like that.

And he has to convince Bruce of this. That Bruce wasn't at fault. By doing so, Batman will get better. He won't be wallowing in despair and he'll go back to fighting criminals like he normally would.

Things will go back to normal like this.

-

It's working. Things are getting better.

Batman is returning to normal, and he's having the life being Robin.

All he has to do when Bruce starts spiralling is whisper in his ears how none of it was his fault, that Jason brought it upon himself. That Bruce did his best, but Jason was too far gone to be helped.

-

Green.

That's the first thing Jason sees. And he's gasping for breath, trying his best not to drown(?).

Everything hurts and doesn't hurt. All Jason can tell is that something is wrong. He shouldn't be here.

And then he's taken out of whatever radioactive mountain dew jazz he was in. He's on the ground, still coughing up whatever the liquid he was in and then someone grabs him and drags him away from wherever he is.

As he runs, he realises that the person dragging him was none other than Talia al Ghul.

But why?

But before he could ask anything, Talia pushed a duffel bag into his arms, telling him he still hadn't been avenged before pushing him off a cliff.

-

Days go by, and Jason found out what Talia meant...

Not only was his murderer still alive and continued to commit horrendous crimes and crimes with no punishment, but that there was a new Robin.

He tried to search the news for Robin's death, but there was nothing. As if Tim (because yes, he found out his name, wasn't that hard with hacking into the Batcave) was always Robin. As if Jason never was.

When he hacked into the Batcave, he saw the report written about him, how he was 'reckless and impulsive', 'too eager for fights', 'not thinking before rushing in', how Bruce failed to save him from the criminal element, and Jason's heart broke.

Tears flow as he continues to read what Bruce thought of him.

He then reads the report on Tim Drake and...

The tears are soon replaced with cold fury. If his tears could turn to ice, they would. His eyes turned cold and distant.

Bruce...

He had written how wonderful Tim was as a sidekick. How he never disobeyed, or when he did, how brave and courageous he was. How when Bruce is down, Tim would say words of comfort.

The list went on, and with each sentence, Jason's heart grew colder and colder.

He wonders if Bruce ever thought of himself as Jason's father.

Because Jason sure did see Bruce as one.

But now? The knife is too deep, and the thought of reuniting with them, gone. Shattered just like his hope that he would be avenged.

So, they want to paint him as the bad Robin? Make it so that he was always doomed to fail? Then he'll show them exactly what they've said.

And if they try to change and help 'fix' him? Well, better luck in the next life, he guesses.

Thus, he starts planning. His big return. And he knows just what to do.

Because what's better than becoming one with a lie? When, or if Bruce gets bitch slapped into realising what he's done wrong, he'll become wrought with grief, and Jason can say that, "Actions have consequences B. You should know that, after all, you're the one who told me that."

And then with Tim. He's found out exactly what he's said about him. And, if he's so desperate to stay as Robin, as Batman's partner, then he should give him a reality check. That life isn't daisies and rainbows. That this is what happens when you talk badly about a dead kid. Because if Tim's going to say horrible things about him, who is Jason to refute it? He wouldn't know how Jason's like anyway, and saying otherwise would be futile with how close-minded he looks.

Chapter Text

Jason found out the truth about Alfred...

He was going through all of the footage of the Batcave. It was to string a plan to make little ol' Batman run around in circles, catch up on what's new, see if there's anything he can use as blackmail, but...

He- he thought Alfred was a good person, his grandfather in some ways, before he died...

Now? He can only laugh as he replays the clip where Alfred tells Bruce that Jason was always doomed, that it was only natural that he died the way he did.

He had also put up a memorial case with his Robin costume, a plaque saying [JASON TODD - ROBIN - A GOOD SOLDIER]

Heh-

A soldier...

Not even a son...

Not even a Wayne...

Jason heard glass shatter.

Except...

It wasn't glass that broke...

Bruce's betrayal already broke him, but this as well?

Jason doubts he'll ever be fixed again.

He wipes the tears that had fallen, his eyes sharpening as he loses any hope that someone was on his side.

Well...

If Alfred wants to say that it was natural for a homeless kid to die the way he did, might as well show him what happens when you mess with them, right? And a smile starts to etch its way onto Jason's face.

But...

If someone were to see his smile, all they'd see is a broken boy who has lost all hope in humanity.

Chapter Text

Jason was just chatting with Dick while resting on a rooftop, but then a bracelet flew towards Jason and attached itself to his wrist.

Jason just looks down at it in confusion before trying to take it off. But it wouldn't...

He was starting to get worried, but then he stopped and grabbed his chest as if he was having a heart attack.

Dick looks at Jason worriedly when he sees Jason hunch over as if in pain.

And the next thing Jason knows, he's screaming and writhing in pain. The clothes on his back start bulging, as if something was growing. It grew bigger and bigger until finally the clothes ripped, and wings, pure white wings, sprouted out.

The screams grew louder. Jason's hands were in his head, one was pulling at his hair as he shook his head, trying to get the pain to stop.

Next, something started to form above his head, a halo, shining as bright as the sun.

Tears flowed down his face, but it wasn't tears...

No.

It was blood.

Blood was streaking down Jason's face...

His screams no longer felt human; instead resembled something else, something not of this world.

Dick could do nothing but watch in horror as Jason, his baby brother, transformed into something else. He stood petrified before regaining his senses and yelling on the comm for everyone to get here ASAP, that something wrong is happening to Jason.

He hears another shriek and sees another pair of wings sprouting from Jason's temples, expanding out in the air before closing over his eyes.

And then the noises stopped, Jason no longer made any noise as he slowly stood up straight again and then turned to look (?) at Dick.

Dick takes a defensive pose, unsure of what this new Jason (is he still Jason?) would do next. Whether he'd attack or do something else

Chapter Text

A woman had been assaulted. And Jason's mind was filled with thoughts on how to proceed, how to get rid of the sorry excuse of a man.

The woman, Opal, was assaulted by a powerful man, someone who can easily buy his way out of prison.

Jason looked down at his various weapons. He- he could torture the man, make him regret his actions, or he could straight up shoot him. Have it over and done with. But... Is he willing to do that? If that means Bruce will come after him. If the test of the family will come after him? And becoming wanted in so many countries, is it worth it?

Because it isn't the question about whether Batman will come for him or not, because he definitely will, it's about whether it's worth risking their relationship completely shattering to the point that it can no longer be fixed.

Since it doesn't matter if Jason himself does it or if he hires someone else. The simple fact that he wanted the vermin dead. And if the vermin died, Bruce would be enraged and come for him. Because it's the same thing to the man, it still resulted in a death (even if it was an irredeemable scumbag).

Jason thinks of what he could do in such circumstances.

Have Opal press charges of sexual assault? But he doubts it's effective, doubts the justice system would take her seriously because she's a sex worker. Because there's no evidence. Because the justice system is so corrupt that even if they go to court, they would not charge the vermin.

And as he thinks of this, an image pops into his head, of a woman who underwent a similar experience, back before he died and came back. Of a woman he promised would get the justice she deserved, that justice would prevail, and how, ultimately, he failed her.

Gloria Stanson. A woman Jason barely knew, but enough to be enraged by the injustice. How could they press charges for assault. How they had to find alternative evidence for something else Felipe had done.

It took far too long, and when they did manage to detain the scum, Gloria was overcome with anxiety about being assaulted again. And when they finally had Felipe at the police station, he had gotten his hands on a telephone, had ringed Gloria and threatened that he'd come back for her.

And Gloria...

She couldn't take it, and Jason saw her lifeless body hanging.

Jason saw first-hand just how useless the criminal justice system was, how useless Batman was when it mattered. Because the law is determined by those with power, they are the ones to determine what is right or wrong; they choose who gets charged and sentenced. And Batman still places his trust in them, never doing what is needed.

And Jason... He's wrought with grief, he can't fail another victim again, he- he just can't! Not when there's a chance to prevent Opal from going through the same things Gloria experienced...

But... How? Just what can he do to make sure Opal is safe? That she no longer has to fear the vermin being out there, able to come for them at any moment?

Jason would sketch plan after plan in his safehouse, mumbling this or that, crossing things out, adding things in.

He looks back at his weapons, and he just doesn't know what to do.

And it sure doesn't help that he hadn't slept in days, trying to rack his brain to somehow think of something, something that will work.

Something to help Opal, because no one else will. He learnt the hard way the first time. He can't trust the police or Batman. They'll only make things worse, give her false hope before utterly destroying it.

Jason won't do that, he can't...

But that means serving all ties with his family... And Jason doesn't know if he can survive if that happened...

Chapter Text

Jason came back from the dead, but is he truly alive?

Sure he bleeds, sure his heart is beating, but by definition, isn't Jason basically a zombie?

Something that died and is now alive again. But not in the same way a human being is.

This thought had crossed his mind a few times, but when the batarang slit his throat, it plagued his thoughts. Because Bruce doesn't kill. Batman doesn't kill, not humans at least.

Batman's actions confirmed his worst fears. Jason Todd is dead and nothing would change that. Not even coming back to life.

So does that mean by Batman's definition, Jason isn't a living being?

But then...

Who is he?

Something using the boy's body?

He doesn't know.

Red Hood had spent a few weeks as a wreck, his thoughts consuming him after he somehow miraculously survived his throat bleeding out (please don't tell him he can't die, he doesn't know if he'll be able to handle it if he is...).

Jason is dead and Batman made sure if that. So all he is, is Red Hood. Batman's enemy.

He... He's confirmed how Batman feels about him. Batman rejected him, put Jason's murderer before him. So...

Nothing matters anymore, does it?

It doesn't matter what he does now, he knows that Batman will be on his trail. So why shouldn't he fight back? Become Batman's worst enemy, even worse than the Clown.

Show him the consequences of his actions.

Because Jason Todd is dead. Batman's son is dead. He is not Jason Todd. And he is not Batman's son.

He is Red Hood and he can do whatever he wants.

He'll first get Jason Todd his justice, something Batman failed, something he had a hand in. Something that infuriates Red Hood.

How dare a hero do such a despicable act? His whole shtick was justice, and when his son died, he deliberately makes sure his son can't get it?

After Red Hood gets his revenge for Jason, he'll set his sights on Batman. And he'll make it his life goal to torture the man.

Because Red Hood will never again be a living being. Will never be accepted by his family from the past life. Because even after reaching out for help, he was shot down and left to disappear. Like the undead being he was.

And so, Red Hood finally embraces the worst side of himself. The side that no longer cared. No longer felt anything, all his hope disappearing into smoke, just like Batman will soon become.

Because what's more frightening than having an enemy that knows their every move, is five steps ahead, and is seemingly unkillable?

Chapter Text

Jason wakes up and his body is aflame with pain. He screams as he somehow escapes the green water(?).

He screams and clutches his arms, in agony as pain engulfed him, his back burning. As if something was trying to escape its confines, tearing him open.

Jason passed out, the pain being too much to handle.

-

Jason slowly awakens, not yet moving or opening his eyes, the I grained training to figure out what's going on before making any rash decision.

He doesn't know how he's alive, but those thoughts don't matter right now. What matters in finding out where he is and why.

He was lying down somewhere, most like a bed with how comfy(?) it was. But...

Something was strange.

He could feel all his body limbs like normal, but there was something else, as if he had grown another body part.

Which, should be impossible... Right?

But sensing no one was around, he seemed it somewhat safe to open his eyes and look around.

And, it was just a normal room? Nothing indicating a hostage situation, just a normal lived in room.

But he sees the mirrors, catching his reflection in it and-

He rushes to the mirror, tripping as he hastily got up, but Jason did care, immediately getting up again and quickly went to the mirror that showed his body as he knew it, no scars he once had in sight.

But at the back, behind Jason was wings. Snow white wings that were the same size as his body. The wings were like the ones you'd see depicted with angels. Something so pure, something no evil could taint.

He twists his head around and he can see them, can feel them as he touches them. They were soft to the touch, warm. It felt kind as if the mere presence helped to soothe him.

Jason's ears were ringing, his thoughts too loud, too much for what happened to him.

He- he somehow woke up after dying(?) he died right? And he has wings now?

Just as that moment, the door opened and Jason snapped his head to see who it was.

And the woman who entered looked familiar, from what? He doesn't know.

All he can remember right now is that he knows this woman.

And then a flash of a memories appears, a woman who loved Bruce. A woman who loved her enemy.

"Talia..." The name left his lips.

Which, what? Why is Talia here?

All Talia does, is sit down while gesturing at Jason to sit back on the bed.

And Jason does, because what else was he supposed to do? Even if he has the skills to fight her, he has these massive wings that would definitely disorient him.

After Jason sits down, he stares at Talia, his gaze filled with questions, and Talia calmly tells her of what she knows.

Of how one of her guards found him wandering around Gotham, who was recognised because of his fighting skills when fighting someone. The fighting skills unique to Robin.

But he was otherwise unresponsive, not reacting to anything unless it posed a threat to him, only doing the bare minimum to function.

How she brought him back with her and did her best to cure Jason, but nothing worked, and she had to resort to dipping him in the Lazarus pit.

"And why do I have wings?" Jason says gesturing to behind him, where the wings sat.

Talia just shook her head, telling him that she did not know, that this has never happened before, but it shouldn't be anything bad. The Lazarus pit never does things for the wrong reason, there's a misconception of the 'pit rage', but that is far from the truth. That the pit only gives what the user needs in the moment, so only time will tell.

-

It's been a few years since then.

Jason has fully mastered moving his body, accounting for his wings, moving one with them. Using them to his advantage whenever necessary.

Jason found out everything that happened after he died, and was fully ready to kill Bruce, was so close to as well, but he didn't.

Instead, he went back to Talia and asked her to find him teachers for everything, saying that if he's to kill Bruce, he wants Bruce to know it was him that did it.

And despite her initial reluctance, Talia provided Jason with teachers, from how to create a poison with no cure to skinning a person alive.

And after that, he went back to Gotham, as the Red Hood. A mockery to Batman, and to take back from the Joker after he stole everything from Jason.

But... During this time, his feathers...

The slowly started to change colour.

Going from the pure white that they were, to the shiniest black he has ever seen, and yet, still staying as warm and soft as it previously was.

When he first noticed, Jason had freaked out, wondering what was going on, so much that he had an existential crisis, because for him, the whiteness was like a symbol, that he was still good, that he wasn't bad. But then reflecting on his recent actions, Jason realized that, maybe it's about time for them to change. Because he knows that what he's done isn't acceptable. Isn't good or moral in any way.

He doesn't regret it. He'll do what he has to do to achieve his goals, it's just... The symbolism it had brought comfort to him sometimes.

But since they've changed, Jason's accepted it. Might as well look like the messenger of Death, amiright?

Now then, time to plan his confrontation with Bruce.

Chapter Text

A new player was in Gotham.

A man mocking him with Jokers old alias, the Red Hood.

The man had wings, once white as if symbolising a guardian angel, but over time, Bruce noticed the wings slowly changing, as if corruption was slowly making its way into the man and manifesting through his wings.

Now, they were nearly glossy black, as if it could engulf you while into the darkness.

Bruce hadn't like Red Hood, too much of an anomaly for his liking, but with each interaction, he could feel something was wrong. Something grating at his nerves for some reason.

And then...

The helmet came off and he was confronted with Jason.

His dead son.

Which should be impossible, how could Jason be alive? He saw and buried his dead body!

Not to mention the wings.

This has to an imposter, a clone, whatever that thing is, it's not his son.

He ignored the horror at the thought that Jason was now an angel of death. How his wings had blackened as his tally of murders continued to rise.

That thing is not his son, and for having the audacity to do such a thing in his city in Jason name, he will deal out justice.

Chapter Text

Jason who's a very social and outgoing kid, but over time he slowly becomes more withdrawn and quieter.

People from school see this as very concerning, because kids don't just stop being outgoing without a reason.

And Bruce doesn't notice it. Because as Robin, Jason still talks a lot, making quips, even if it isn't as often now. He hasn't noticed how Jason hardly talks when he's back at the manor.

Chapter Text

Jason writing in cursive for a mission and everyone is in shock cause they thoughts he'd have bad handwriting, even Bruce, Alfred, Dick and Babs who knew Jason had fancy handwriting before he died, but they forgot such a tiny fact. They try to justify it saying that it's been such a long time since they last saw Jason handwriting and that to much has happened in between that it's only natural they forgot.

(but they wouldn't have if Bruce hadn't gotten rid of Jason's assignments for school)

Chapter Text

Jason wonders where it all went wrong...

Maybe it was when he thought he could capitalise on his cooking, making videos to earn money to donate to charity or those in need.

Maybe it was the fact that whenever something, or someone, stressed the fuck out of him, he'd bake or cook something, often giving the leftovers to the homeless kids in Crime Alley.

And don't get him wrong, Jason's doing great, fantastic really.

He's somehow managed to earn shit ton of money he used to help others, which is good. It's just that...

The comments? It's just...

Straight up weird. No, weird doesn't even begin to describe it.

In the comment section, there are words or phrases that Jason just doesn't understand. Maybe it's because he missed a few years of internet culture after dying? Who knows?

Anyway, the comments kind of freak him out a little.

-

He decides to look at other people's cooking video and see how they do things, and... He sighs, he sees numerous videos of people saying, 'here's an easy dish when you can't be bothered to cook' and then proceeds to literally cook, as if the literal definition of cooking wasn't: 'the practice or skill of preparing food by combining, mixing, and heating ingredients'.

He was so going to rant about this in his next cooking video.

Chapter Text

Ghost Jason Todd with a halo on his head and wings on his back.

Sometimes in the corner of someone's eye, they see a floating Robin, his face obscured in black.

When Bruce or someone else talks bad about the dead Robin, they can always catch a glimpse of an angel that looks similar to the dead boy.

Even when they see the ghost of a dead boy after blaming him for his death, twisting his name and tarnishing his reputation beyond recognition, they continue, as if there was nothing wrong with it. As if they weren't doing something wrong.

Because the ghost is only a figment of their imagination, right?

Chapter Text

A monster.

That's what he saw when he looked at the man across from him.

The man was wearing militia style clothing, highly protective with little to no weakness.

But the bare face Jason saw...

It was like looking in the mirror, except-

The man did not have a spot of white in his hair, instead, he had a scar on his cheek.

A big wide J. He didn't need to ask to know how the man got it.

-

Jason was fighting a group of goons like every other day, when one of them had picked up a strange looking gun, which, was obviously a magical gun.

But before Jason could react, he was hit, and the next thing he knew was that he was falling.

Falling falling falling.

Until he finally hit the ground. Yet somehow, it didn't feel as if he feels off a 10-story building, no. It felt as if he had fallen to the ground from a chair.

Jason looked around, wary of his situation, and then he saw it.

A man covered in armor mercilessly killing everyone in his path. No hesitation at all as he shot civilian after civilian.

Jason immediate rushed towards the man, tackling him from the back and quickly disarming him.

The man fought back and nearly succeeded, but Jason was just a tad bit faster and had knocked him out.

-

Jason had then taken to wrapping the man up so that he couldn't be able to escape from his binds, nor attack him. He then worked on taking the helmet off, and...

It was scarily similar to his own helmet... Same mechanics, same locks...

Jason didn't like where this was going.

So when he finally got the helmet off, he can't say he was that surprised seeing his own face, albeit a little younger and slightly different than his own.

Jason signs and waits for other Jason to wake up.

-

And now the other Jason was awake, he was initially shocked seeing his own face but then started glaring at Jason.

"So, pray do tell, what happened to you to end up this way?"

Other Jason snorts, "None of ya business."

Jason shrugs, "It will be soon, because what I've found out about what you've done... I don't really care if you're another me, I have rules and... You've broken them." He says as he looks down on the newspaper he found, recalling everything the Arkham Knight had done.

Knight just stays quiet, continuing to glare at Jason.

Jason sighs, "Do you regret what you've done?"

Knight snorts, "I don't, why would I?" He says condescendingly.

And that has Jason taking his own gun out, aiming at Knight's forehead, "Guess you've forgotten what it means to be Robin, what it means to be a vigilante and help people." Is all Jason says before shooting.

Jason doesn't think it's worth trying to change Knight, obvious in the way he had no regard to taking innocents lives.

Jason would do it to any criminal, another version of him makes no difference.

Now then, he obviously has to kill this world's Joker, he won't simply just kill a version of himself that's become a monster and then let the clown live.

Jason sighs for nth time, "Welp, never better than the present."