Chapter Text
-- OVERWATCH CHAT --
LENA: ok im logged in! the dna scanner kept messing up and wouldnt process me :(
WINSTON: Did you hold still like it told you to?
LENA: youre supposed to stay STILL for that??
WINSTON: ...You got in, and that’s what matters. Keep your computer on you and you won’t have to log in again each time.
LENA: of course, love!
LENA: i wouldnt leave my guns behind anyway theyre kind of attached :P
ANA: what the fuck is this
WINSTON: A chat group, Captain Amari. It was in today’s announcement.
ANA: does anyone actually pay attention to those
WINSTON: Well... no.
ANA: yeah thats what i thought
ANA: anyway why do we need a chat group lol
WINSTON: We can use this for a variety of things, actually! For people who miss the announcements, we can pin important messages for later viewing, notify everyone to said messages, and so on.
WINSTON: Oh, and we can also use the voice channels to communicate in case our regular channels are down.
ANA: can i have a blue name too
WINSTON: No. It’s for the administrators. For the time being, I’ll leave that task to myself.
ANA: damn
REINHARDT: isn’t this program basically discord?
WINSTON: Modelling it after a widely used chat program seemed like the wisest decision.
REINHARDT: hold on, can you add the airhorn bot to this server?
WINSTON: No, Reinhardt.
REINHARDT: well why not?
WINSTON: It’s not the same program, they just look similar.
WINSTON: Anyway, this program is different because it’s more private. People won’t be poking into our conversations here. I suppose it’s not impossible, but it’d be very difficult.
REINHARDT: where’s the one-on-one chat?
WINSTON: It’s the same as Discord, in the top left icon.
REINHARDT: i could’ve guessed that
ANA: lmao but you didnt
REINHARDT: i just need to ask someone to play an airhorn for me!
ANA: i cant believe youre trying that old joke on us
REINHARDT: i didn’t think any of these kids would appreciate the humor.
ANA: i didnt think you had a sense of humor in the first place
REINHARDT: now that’s just rude. :(
LENA: err is this what the chats supposed to be used for?
LENA: @WINSTON
WINSTON: @LENA: Sorry, I was away from the keyboard. I was hoping we could talk strategy or utilize it in a more practical way.
ANA: why didnt you just type afk
WINSTON: I thought that typing out ‘away from the keyboard’ would make my apology sound more sincere.
ANA: i mean its ok we all know what it stands for anyway
JACK: Hey everyone! what’d i miss here? :-)
ANA: nothing important
WINSTON: Nothing important.
JACK: Now we can talk strategy, right?
ANA: ughhhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
ANA: we just had our strat sesh yesterday can you like
ANA: chill
ANA: for 24 SOLID hours
JACK: But there’s so much more we can do here! i left my phone in my room yesterday and none of you would lend me yours so i couldn’t project the holo diagrams. :-(
ANA: we didnt want to lend you our phones because youd make the session go a lot longer than it needed to
ANA: were already fully prepped for next mission dude
JACK: :-(
GABRIEL: whatd i miss.
ANA: nothing important
GABRIEL: ok. figured.
ANA: wheres the kid
GABRIEL: told him to run a few laps to get him out of my hair.
ANA: hahaha nice
ANA: holographic five
ANA: did you open that text i almost sent a holographic fistbump instead
GABRIEL: yeah i got it.
ANA: k cool
JESSE: you made me run laps for your own amusement???
GABRIEL: no.
GABRIEL: did you even read what i typed. i made you run laps so youd fuck off.
JACK: Looks like somebody’s in trouble!
GABRIEL: shut up jack.
ANA: hahahahaha oh wow get told
JESSE: i wouldve left you alone if youd just asked!
-- REINHARDT added AIRHORN BOT to the server. --
REINHARDT: YES
WINSTON: NO
REINHARDT: !airhorn
JACK: JESUS CHRIST!
ANA: you cant hear me laughing but i want everyone here to know im laughing
GABRIEL: that was loud.
ANA: your own fault for keeping your phone at top volume to listen to your awful angry music
GABRIEL: theres nothing wrong with my taste in music.
LENA: what was that??
REINHARDT: i added a bot that plays an airhorn noise to anyone in the voice channels when you type the !airhorn command
REINHARDT: normally i wouldn’t bother with this kind of silly behaviour, but it was too funny to resist
REINHARDT: you kids with your holographic facetiming need to understand what the pinnacle of humour was on the internet back in my day
GABRIEL: literally nobody here wants to hear about the internet in 2016.
LENA: yeah, whatd they do back then anyway? ride dinosaurs to work?
REINHARDT: @WINSTON: how'd that play out loud to everyone?
WINSTON: It plays to anyone in the voice channels.
REINHARDT: so we’re all auto-added to the voice channel by default? who thought of that
WINSTON: Some parts of this chat client are experimental. The issues are still being ironed out.
LIAO: eyyy whaddup crew
JACK: Weren’t you out doing something? running an errand earlier?
LIAO: that was EARLIER bruh im done running errands for the day
LIAO: genji and i sparred a lil hes a good opponent
JESSE: why aint he here now?
LIAO: uhh iunno i think he was stretchin or w/e
LIAO: even cyborgs gotta stay limber dude
JESSE: you didnt hurt him didja?
LIAO: nah it was just friendly sparring
GENJI: Help
ANGELA: You injured him enough for him to be in the infirmary. :(
JESSE: oh my lord
GENJI: Haha kidding did i miss anything important
ANA: no
ANGELA: @ANA: Torbjörn and I are working on a new biotic device that I believe you’d be interested in. He’s working right now, but I’ll make a chat group for us to discuss it.
ANA: oh sweet
LIAO: can i see :O
ANA: no didnt you see her @ me not you
LIAO: :(
-- WINSTON banned AIRHORN BOT from the server. --
REINHARDT: NOOO
ANA: you monster
WINSTON: It had to be done.
REINHARDT: no it didn’t :’(
LIAO: time to play some funeral music anyone got a track on em?
GABRIEL: i do.
LIAO: gabe why tf do u have funeral music on ur phone
GABRIEL: thats none of your business.
ANA: its probably his ringtone lol
LIAO: can u imagine??
ANA: yea
GABRIEL: its not my ringtone.
JESSE: to be fair nobody has their phone off vibrate or silent
JACK: You dont even need a phone these days! i mean i still have mine because im attached to it but my eyepiece is so much more convenient.
GABRIEL: do you have your phone on you right now.
JACK: Yes of course! i take it with me everywhere i go, you never know when it can come in handy. the more computers you carry, the more practical, right?
ANA: werent you JUST talking about how you left your phone in your room yesterday and thats why you couldnt show us those low quality holo diagrams?
JACK: Sometimes i forget my phone but i dont mean to. :-(
JACK: Wait where'd my phone go
JACK: Crap!!
GABRIEL: you didnt leave it in your room. you left it in mine.
LIAO: wh
ANA: well now things are getting interesting
GABRIEL: shit.
JACK: What? theres nothing wrong with me being in gabes room yesterday!
ANA: jack we were in your strat session almost all day and you passed out at the dinner table because you talked for like twelve hours straight
ANA: the only time you couldve been in gabes room was before the meeting
ANA: which started at like
ANA: 7am
LIAO: im on the edge of my seat rn holy shit
JACK: Whatre you implying?
LIAO: nothing we didnt already know buddy
ANA: im not even mad
ANA: im just disappointed you didnt tell me sooner
JACK: Ana... :-(
ANA: get your nose smiley away from me
LIAO: i cant believe gabe and jackre fucking!!
ANA: i can
ANA: i brought this up months ago why didnt you believe me
LIAO: idk i guess i couldnt visualize it
GABRIEL: we arent having sex.
ANA: dont dig your grave deeper than it already is reyes
ANA: do you want me to tell your mother
GABRIEL: no dont.
GABRIEL: dont lie to my mother about my relationship status. shes going to want me to propose if you give her that kind of idea.
LIAO: omfg
ANA: omfg
JACK: ?????
JACK: I’m sorry i’m lost now??
LIAO: ur ‘boyfriend’ wants to marry u
JACK: What!!
GABRIEL: stop.
LIAO: ggjvbdfmlhdf
LENA: dont push gabe hell be ready when hes ready!!
LENA: if they didnt want to tell us then lets be respectful of that ok??
JACK: I’m so confused! can someone please fill me in without it being a joke?
LIAO: can u confirm if u and gabe r fucking
JACK: Um...??
GABRIEL: why is this happening.
ANA: because you two slept together and didnt fill us in on the juicy gossip
LIAO: yea were disappointed in u both :(
LIAO: mostly ana tho her disappointment could kill a man
LIAO: or in this case two men lol
JESSE: GABRIEL AND JACK ARE FUCKING SINCE WHEN WHAT
JESSE: HOW DID I MISS THIS
GABRIEL: jesse i swear to god.
ANA: lol dont get grounded
JESSE: i was eating
JESSE: but clearly i missed out on some real important conversation
GENJI: I saw this coming from a mile away
ANA: see genji understands
GENJI: Its like you were are purposefully blind to them sneaking away
GENJI: One after the other but in the end
GENJI: Always together
LENA: well they are good friends!
LENA: the best of friends
REINHARDT: just guys being dudes?
GABRIEL: not you too.
ANA: just gals bein pals
GABRIEL: neither of us are gals.
ANA: figured you wouldnt get the joke
GABRIEL: where the hell did winston go. hes the only admin in this group.
LIAO: hes probly got work to do unlike u
LIAO: u got stuff to do too tho
LIAO: u know
LIAO: stuff
LIAO: [[eyebrow_raise_4.gif]]
-- GABRIEL left the server. --
JACK: Look what you guys did! now hes gonna be grumpy for the next week
ANA: @WINSTON: readd the big baby
LIAO: i can hear him listening to loud music in his room
LIAO: but its not his ‘PISSED OFF’ tracklist
LIAO: so i think were in the clear
WINSTON: What happened?
GENJI: The inevitable id say
JACK: :-/
GENJI: How can you use that emote and take yourself seriously
GENJI: Overwatch never ceases to amaze me