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Cameron had been acting strange for a while. Well, she had always been a little weird in House’s eyes, but she was acting even weirder than usual. She had been avoiding the anesthesiology department like it was on fire, and practically refused to go near that side of the building without either Chase or Foreman accompanying her.
At first it was fun to tease her about it, but now House was starting to get… concerned. Cameron had been actually refusing to complete his orders, which to be fair, was very amusing, but also made him think she had a brain tumour or something.
He had called her into his office standing in front of his whiteboard. “Cameron, I have a special case for you.” He began seriously, writing ‘patient 1’ on the whiteboard. The girl seemed intrigued, looking at the board curiously. “What are the symptoms?” She asked, making House roll his eyes. “Yeah, yeah, I was getting to that, jeez.” He mumbled, before beginning to write.
”Okay, symptoms are; sudden change in personality, avoidance of a particular place, unwilling to go anywhere alone, sudden growth of a spine.” He rattled off, writing them down in a messy handwriting. Cameron frowned, thinking about it.
“That sounds more psychological? But maybe a tumour on the spine if it has suddenly grown?” she offered hesitantly, wincing at the unimpressed look House gave her. “You fellows need to start to learn to not take everything I say literally. It’s a metaphorical growth of the spine.” He replied dryly, watching the cogs turn in his student’s brain.
”Wait- you’re talking about me!?” She asked, definitely pouting. House clapped dramatically, handing her the marker. “Congratulations! You’ve won the big prize! A therapy session with doctor House!.” He exclaimed sarcastically cheerful, sitting down opposite of Cameron.
”Wh- I’m fine! Nothings going on.” She answered defensively, earning a bored groan from House. “‘I’m fine, blablabla’, I’m not an actual therapist, believe it or not. Just tell me why you’ve suddenly grown allergic to anaesthesiology.” He deadpanned, throwing a pen at her — which she caught.
House raised an eyebrow at her, crossing her arms. “Don’t lie to me, doctor Cameron. I’d be very disappointed.” He shook his head sadly, making eye contact with the woman. She was clearly struggling, internally waging a war against herself.
Eventually she seemed to settle down, and sighed. “I… a doctor in the anaesthesia department asked me out, and I rejected him by telling him I’m a lesbian. Now, it’s awkward.” She admitted, seeming embarrassed as she looked down at her shoes. House knew it was true — but it wasn’t the entire story. People lie.
He decided not to push it, however, satisfied with the information he had gotten. It was enough to figure the rest out on his own. ”Alright. Don’t let it affect your job, Cameron.” He sighed, patting her on the shoulder, staring at her for a few seconds.
“That meant you could leave, by the way.” He added after Cameron kept awkwardly sitting in her seat. The younger doctor flushed red, before nodding, and hurriedly leaving the room.
Time for some detective work.
”House, I’m busy.” Wilson sighed, looking at the paper files in front of him. “No you’re not, she’s not terminal, she can wait.” House retorted after glancing at the file, pushing his feet onto his husband’s desk.
The man looked up at him with annoyance, but clearly recognised this wasn’t a battle to be won. “..fine. What do you want, — I didn’t bring extra lunch for you.” The man sighed, pushing House’s shoes off his desk.
”Sweetheart. Darling. Baby. Love of my life, I would never visit you with my only goal being food.” House gasped dramatically, hand on his chest as Wilson shook his head fondly.
”Sure. But seriously, what do you need?” Wilson asked softly, tilting his head curiously. God, House loved this man. Not that he would ever say it out loud,— but he did.
”How many doctors in the anesthesiology department do you know?” House asked, smirking a little as his husband frowned. “What…? I mean, I know most doctors here, but why…?”
“I’m pretty sure someone in anesthesiology is harassing Cameron.” He explained, not trying to hide the disdain in his voice as Wilson’s expression turned into one of concern.
“…Explain.”
House had found his target. Doctor Keith Roger, ‘quit’ at his last hospital because of sexual assault allegations, works in anesthesiology, has a disgusting instagram page which includes posts about ‘stuck up lesbians’, and a name that made Cameron look more uncomfortable than ever. He had sent Wilson out to confirm, who had reported back with a few unsavoury quotes, and an account of Roger gripping Cameron by the arm.
Now, House had a mission. “Hey, wallaby, c’mhere.” He called out of his office, motioning for Chase to get over to him. The Australian looked at foreman, before looking at House again. “Today, please. We’re not in different time zones, remember?” He added with a roll of his eyes, snorting as Foreman shoved Chase towards the door.
”What do you need House?” The young doctor asked, frowning at the empty whiteboard. “Eyes up here, koala. Can you tell doctor… Keith Roger from anesthesiology to get his ass over here?” He ordered, hands folded on his lap as his legs rested on the couch.
Chase looked confused, looking around him. “Uh, why?” He asked, making House sigh exasperatedly. “Jesus, it’s like I’m running a kindergarten. ‘Why house?’ ‘How does this work house?’ ‘Why do we need this house?’ ‘What does that mean house?’ — because I’m not making Foreman do it. It’s your turn.” He deadpanned.
Chase seemed a little embarrassed, but nodded, reassuring House that he’d go get doctor Roger. Kiss ass.
Satisfied, he stood up, swiftly grabbing his cane as he hobbled over to the table in the ‘living room’. “Foreman, on a scale of 1-10, how intimidating do I look.” House asked, smirking when the man replied with a dry “7, if you’re a baby or in a wheelchair.”
Cameron frowned, looking at House with suspicion. “What are you doing….” She asked, eyes flicking to Foreman, who just shrugged.
”Having a meeting.” House replied sweetly, popping a Vicodin, before sitting down as he saw Chase and Doctor Roger approach.
Cameron’s face turned white as a sheet as the latter man entered the room, and she quickly stared down at her hands. Roger smirked at the woman, before turning to House and moving to shake his hand.
House just pushed the man’s hand away with his cane.
”Doctor Roger, lovely to meet you. See, I heard you had some problems with doctor Cameron here, and I thought we could figure it out, compromise.” House smiled sweetly, making Chase pull a face.
”No problems here, doctor House.” Roger’s attitude changed as his expression went stiff, his teeth gritted. House raised an eyebrow, shaking his head.
”See, there is. As I recall, I heard you call my employee, I quote, ‘a stuck up dyke’, who should let you, ‘fuck her ugly ass.’” House repeated the words Wilson had told him, feeling a hint of satisfaction as the man’s face drained of colour. Foreman was now glaring intensively at the man, whilst Chase seemed to be attempting to restrain himself from punching someone, — which came as a slight suprise to House. He didn’t know his kangaroo could bite.
Cameron seemed to want to dissapear into the ground, biting her lip harshly. “How do you-“ Roger began, before shutting his mouth, most likely realising that he had just, in fact, admitted that it was true.
“House…” the girl began, but he shushed her. “Nuh uh. You’re too much of a people pleaser, let daddy do the work.” House tutted, turning his attention back to a now sweating Roger.
He planted the tip of his cane on the man’s chest, making sure the doctor kept his eye contact with him. “If you ever harass Doctor Cameron again in any way, I’m knocking you out and injecting oxygen in your blood.” He stated calmly, his own eyes piercing the anesthesiologist’s.
He stood still like that for a moment, before moving his cane to under Roger’s neck, forcing him to nod, the man eventually catching on and stammering a ‘yes, sir.’
House smiled, dropping his cane, and motioning to the door. “I’m sure you can find your way back to your department. If not, I’m sure doctor Chase and Foreman would be happy to escort you.” He looked at the 2 young doctors, both of them angrily looking at the intruder.
”Im- I’m fine.” Roger muttered, before practically running into the hallway. House clapped his hands when the door closed, smiling.
”Well, that’s fixed. Now get back to work, I don’t pay you to stand around.” He bristled, crossing his arms as chase and foreman both got back to whatever they were doing before.
He raised an eyebrow at Cameron, who was still looking at him in suprise. “That includes you, Cameron. Chop chop, go save some dying kids.” He huffed, eyes widening as the young doctor wrapped her arms around him.
”Thank you.” She whispered, hugging House tightly as he patted her back.
“Yeah yeah, it was distracting you from work. Now hurry up and go help the other 2 on the case.” He grumbled, rolling his eyes as Cameron smiled at him.
Kids these days and their emotions.
