Work Text:
It was confusing.
Confusing and unfair.
There he was, Gunwook found himself sitting at the corner of Hanbin’s studio.
The class ended a few minutes ago, but they stayed a little longer so Matthew could dance more, enjoy himself after a long week.
“Gunwookie, why are you so down? C’mon dance with me” - Matthew screamed watching his best friend through the blurry mirror.
But Gunwook couldn’t, not when he knew he would get the moves wrong and be scolded by their teacher, not when his mind was going a 100 miles per hour with the dirtiest thoughts about his best friend and that white tank top of his, glued to his sweaty body, displaying his muscles like they were a painting at a museum, supposed to be stared at and appreciated.
Gunwook knew they were appreciated but unfortunately not by him, he was the nerdy best friend, the pathetic younger one with no experience who had to sit through long talks about people who did appreciated, people who brought Matthew to heaven and back, doing thighs he couldn’t do.
'But he wanted to, so much’.
He ended up losing track of time, his mind fuzzy, a mixture of enviness, lust and sadness.
Daydreaming while also blaming himself.
’He shouldn’t…
He couldn’t…
But he wanted to feel Matthew skin under his palm
He wanted to taste him
To kiss every single corner of his body and
STOP’
“Gunwook?” - He woke up from his anxious thoughts, Matthew crouched in front of him, his hand laying at Gunwook’s knee so he wouldn’t lose his balance, the younger boy felt his cheeks burning. - “Where were you bro? I’ve been calling you for at least 5 minutes now.”
He still didn’t say anything, feeling stupid, but Matthew knew him too well even without knowing what was going on through the brunettes head he could sense something was off and he understood Gunwook would not say anything, he knew the younger probably could not organize his (way too many) thoughts to form a sentence, that happened when he dozed off for so long. - “Let’s go, Hanbin’s closing for the day, Hao called and demanded he go home.”
Gunwook nodded, getting up, trying to get back to himself.
What was going on today? He usually ignored this kind of thoughts so well but he just couldn't brush it off today, not when Matthew was holding his hand while they headed to the lockers, dripping sweat in the most unholy way, hair all over the place.
’He must look so good when he is…
STOOOOOP’
“Hey, you okay? You look weird today.” - Matthew asked, receiving only a nod from the brunette beside him. - “Do you want a ride home?” - I do want to ride but not the kind you’re talking about, Gunwook thought - “I know how long it takes to go home by bus this late and you only stayed because of me so…” - Matthew was looking up at him thought his lashes, almost pleading
“Please” - Gunwook answered, almost whispering, and Matthew smiled widely
“Yay, okay! Do you mind waiting a little longer then? I have to shower before leaving because I'm taking that girl out, you know the one with pink hair? And I feel nasty right now, don’t want her to see me like this.”
Shit. Gunwook shook his head as a response, he didn’t mind waiting, of course he didn’t.
“And we’re back to the nonverbal answers…” - Matthew whispered to himself frustrated, Gunwook noticed how he forced himself to smile again - “Okay then, wait for me babe, i’ll be right back”
The younger boy stared at his best friend’s back while he headed to the showers, his muscles looking even bigger after dancing for so long, he watched as the boy took out the white tank top that he was dreaming of ripping off a couple of minutes ago and suddenly the sound of water echoed through the room washing back all the lust Gunwook was feeling earlier, the mist fastly filling up the space revealing that Matthew was taking a hotter bath than he should.
Matthew always loved hot showers, but not the warm ones that feel calming, no. Steaming ones that would make his skin go pink after like his whole body was blushing. It was so…
’Maybe he needed a shower too, a really cold one.'
“Hyung, I'll be waiting for you in the car, okay?” - He said loud enough to be heard, not waiting for an answer.
He grabbed Matthew’s car keys, his bag and left, greeting Hanbin on his way out.
The girl with pink hair, what was her name again? Mi something? He unconsciously opened instagram, looking through his best friend’s followers. Minho, Mina, Minji, Minjoo, Minee…
MIZI! The profile pic displayed a girl with pink hair, jackpot.
So he stalked her, torturing himself. She looked so pretty, so small, so sweet, so feminine, exactly what he would describe if someone asked him what Matthew’s type looked like.
Nothing like him.
And with that he was once again feeling terrible about himself, he knew he could never have Matthew, he accepted that already but sometimes being reminded of that (that he was just the nerdy best friend) hurted like a bitch. So he gave up on thinking about anything, he knew nothing could wash away the sadness he caused to himself, he turned off his phone and grabbed his nintendo switch, focusing on the one thing that would comfort him right now, Pokémon Legends: Arceus.
Finally for a while he was able to turn off his brain, tired of floating between depressed and horny, sick of trying to deny how much he kept thinking about his best friend.
How long did he wait? He had no idea but after what looked like way long he saw Hanbin and Matthew coming out of the studio together, turning off the lights and locking the glass doors while chatting. Matthew looked so good, he was wearing black jeans and a blue button down shirt, his hair was still all over the place but somehow you could tell that he put an effort on it to make it that way, Gunwook sensed the rage coming back to him, that girl was so lucky... and it got even worse when his friend opened the door getting inside, his colone filling the air so strongly that Gunwook got dizzy.
"Hey man, sorry it took me so long." - He said reaching for the keys that were forgotten on Gunwook's lap, he tossed the keys to his other hand so he could turn on the car, resting his hand at Gunwook's thigh. - How do I look?"
He asked, smiling, the brunette gulped.
"Good, you always look good hyung." - he said, his voice almost not coming out.
"Aaayeee c'mon be honest, would you make out with me if you were her?" - Matthew joked, trying to manage to leave the parking lot without taking his hand out of Gunwook's thigh, instead he squeezed, making the boy shiver.
Oh this is a sick joke.
"Sure hyung." - Gunwook replied, trying to get his focus back to his game.
"You're so monosyllabic today, what's going on?" - Matthew asked, finally taking his hand out of Gunwook so he could turn the car. The younger one let out a breath that he hadn't noticed he was holding. - "Wait, I know what it is, you're jealous I'm going out with Mizi! Don't worry babe you know you're still my number one right? I only have one princess in my life and it's called Gunwookie" - the Canadian said giggling, expecting his friend to laugh along but that didn't happen.
"I'm not jealous and I told you already, stop calling me princess, why can't you let that go?" - Gunwook said, not taking his eyes out of his switch.
Here's the thing with the princess nickname, a couple of years ago at a party Gunwook got really drunk, like don't know what i'm saying, i'm about to black out drunk and a girl tried to flirt with him claiming that he wanted her because he was staring at her the whole night, but instead of reciprocating Gunwook ran away to find Matthew, begging for them to his best friend to take him home.
Don't get him wrong, the girl was super cute and he would definitely want something with her if he weren't the gayest straight passing boy in their university.
Being straight passing for him was a good thing since he hadn't come out to literally anyone yet but his drunk ass got so nervous and sad he forgot about it.
Anyways, back to the night at the fateful party.
He was in the verge of tears when he found his best friend and Matthew could never say no to him, specially with those red cheeks and those big wet eyes, Matthew was with a girl that he promptly let go of and took Gunwook to his car, the older one was completely sober, thankfully so it was no problem.
The ride home was filled with tears and mumbling, Matthew was trying his best to understand what was going on while driving but it was a hard task since Gunwook would not let go of his hand, when they got to the younger's place Matthew leaded him to the bedroom and placed him sitting at the bed and cupped his face with his hands, cleaning the tears that were still falling.
"Hey babe, what's going on?" - Matthew whispered and that made Gunwook cry even more.
They were always really clingy to each other ever since they first met in their first year of college so calling each other nicknames was not weird for them.
Gunwook mumbled something but it was so small that Matthew didn't understand.
"Say that again" - Matthew asked also whispering, getting closer to the boy and caressing his cheek - "I can not understand you Gunwookie, i need to know what happened so i can help you"
"Hyung, can you call me princess? Just once?" - Gunwook asked, you could see how drunk he was through his voice. He looked so small, so shy that if they weren't so close to each other Matthew wouldn't have heard what he said.
"Princess?" - Gunwook nodded and Matthew smiled - "Sure, can you tell me what happened my princess?"
"A girl tried to kiss me, she said i was staring at her all night and she knew i wanted her but i was too shy to try something." - He said sobbing again - "She was wrong, i didn't want her, i don't like girls."
They were both silent for what felt like infinite seconds.
"But were you staring?" - Matthew asked, if Gunwook was not so drunk he would question why wasn't Matthew surprised by his revelation, he still thinks about that to this day.
"I was! But not because I wanted her, but because I wanted to be like her, look as pretty as her..."
"Did she look like a princess?" - Matthew asked, grinning as his friend nodded again - "But you also look like a princess babe, and I bet you're way prettier than her."
"No hyung, I'm not. I'm not pretty, i'm big, i'm manly, i have muscles and i'm tall" - Gunwook cried
"None of these are reasons for you not to be pretty."
"Yes they are!"
"No they're not! You're the prettiest boy I have ever seen, Gunwookie."
While saying that Matthew stroked Gunwook's hair, pushing him closer so he could rest his head on Matthew's shoulder, the younger boy relaxed under his touch, closing his eyes slowly.
"And don't worry, you'll always be my princess" - Gunwook knows Matthew said something after that but he just can't remember, he remembers waking up with his arms over the older boy's body, his hand still tangled in Gunwook's hair, his calm breathing.
That day Gunwook came out to his best friend, that day was the first of many cuddle nights at Gunwook's apartment and that from that day on Matthew called Gunwook princess at least once a day every time they were alone.
Back to the present the younger boy was pouting, focused on Pokemon, trying not to feel pathetic rewinding that memory for the millionth time.
The rest of the ride was silent, Matthew eventually understood Gunwook was not in a good mood and stopped trying to interact with him, Gunwook felt selfish he wanted to ask Matthew not to go, to cancel his plans and stay with him, they could watch a movie, listen to music, play a game, order take outs but he stopped himself, just because he had the worst love life and was in love with his straight best friend it didn't mean the said best friend couldn't have a love life himself. As soon as they arrived Gunwook said his goodbyes, thanking Matthew for the ride and wishing him good luck on his date without being able to look at him directly and with that he got out of the car.
Unfortunately by the time the elevator arrived at his floor the horny part of himself had already taken control, the angry and depressed part of himself that kept comparing him and the girl with the pink hair was detained by the memories of Matthew's tattoos showing up thought the white fabric he was wearing earlier, images of him dancing, his arms out moving so effortlessly, his skin turning red from the steaming water, his beautiful hands at Gunwook's thigh, squeezing it.
If Matthew was going to have a good time tonight why couldn't Gunwook? It wouldn't be the first time he thought about his best friend to get there, no one would ever know... He could just get off, shower and go to bed, he lived by himself anyway.
So that's what he did, he closed the door behind him, leaving his bag and shoes behind, he sat at the sofa without even bothering to turn the lights on, his hand drifted from his hair all the way down to the waistband of his jeans reaching the button and undoing it easily, pulling down the zipper revealing his already semi-hard dick hiding under his underwear, he slipped his hand inside the fabric holding it lightly feeling his own eyes squinting involuntarily before ogling at the picture of him and his best friend beside the TV, he pictured Matthew’s hand instead of his.
_“What is this princess? Already squirming when I haven't even started? Are you that into me? So pathetic.”_
Gunwook could hear Matthew’s voice inside his head, saying things that drove him crazy.
“Matthew” - he whimpered almost, his voice loud in a way that he thanked the emptiness of the house
He tightened the grip, his fingers wrapping around his dick while grinding up the air, making desperate noises, stroking slowly, running his thumb over the wet head.
He placed his other hand on his own waist, squeezing it a little remembering his best friend's hand at his thigh earlier once again, he imagined that grip obligating him to grind faster, picturing Matthew making him sway on his cock.
_“C’mon princess, I know you can do better than this.”_
He heard Matthew’s voice again at the back of his mind and with that he closed his eyes, his parted lips unable to contain the moaning, he started to stroke a little tighter, faster, clinging to the cushions more and more.
A part of him could not ignore his desires anymore, It was no longer a want but a need to feel Matthew's hand in him, his thick cock stretching him out, filling him up.
Gunwook craved to feel him, every single part of him.
“Please hyung” - he begged, almost crying, as if his best friend was there to give him what he wanted.
But he wasn't, he would never be, not like that.
So Gunwook imagined, he kept stroking himself trying to hold back, trying to be high like that for just a little longer and he did, for as long as he could, until he couldn’t take it anymore.
“Good girl Gunwookie, you’re such a good girl, so pretty, you can cum now babe, cum for me princess” - He heard his hyung’s voice in his mind and couldn't help but to smile, oh to please the Canadian like, he wanted to be good so badly.
He felt his cum spurt, his hand getting sticky as he gasped for air, his cock throbbing and pulsing as he pictured Matthew one last time, grinning at the sight of his princess coming so pitiably.
And then guilt.
It was usual for him to feel like this when he masturbated thinking about someone he knew in real life, i mean mostly Matthew, once he tried with a guy from their college basketball team that seated beside him in a class and he thought it was hot but the orgasm was not as good and he couldn’t look the boy in the eyes anymore, he changed seats and never went to another basketball game again. With Matthew it was different, he did feel a little bit guilty but not as bad, he always desired Matthew somehow so he was used to it? He didn’t know how to explain but it was.
Everything Matthew related in his life was a huge snow ball of confusion and unexplainable things.
He had no idea how long he sat there, ogling at their framed picture but a sudden light coming from the table took him from his trance, it looked like someone was texting him, since his heartbeat was still not completely stable he chose to ignore it for now.
“Shit, I have to shower.” - he whispered to himself, feeling the mess he made without being able to actually see it due to the darkness of the house.
So he went straight to the bathroom without turning on the lights, his brain fighting itself between being sad and guilty, questioning himself if by now Matthew was already making out with the pink haired girl or if they were still just talking and having dinner, did Matthew bring up Gunwook at some point? Was she jealous? Was she wearing a skirt? A bow in her hair? A very pretty cardigan? Did Matthew hold her hand? Called her pretty? He hoped not.
The other side of his brain was still a bit fuzzy, still in the high of what happened at the living room, this side unintentionally turned the hot water on way hotter than Gunwook’s taste, steaming hot triggering him watching his own skin turn a bit red, blushing just like Matthew’s one normally does, thanks to the -always horny- side of his brain he took a long time letting the water wash away everything, he stood there in introspection, his bathroom being taken by the fog.
After a while he found himself wearing only his black boxers, his skin still a little flushed from the hot water, standing at the living room again, this time with the light turned on and he finally saw how much of a mess he made, his bag thrown close to the entrance door, his cushions dented, a few of them on the floor.
“I’ll just clean everything up tomorrow.” - He said to himself.
Maybe he should have dinner but he had no strength to cook anything and it was late for him to order, most of the restaurants were closed or about to close.
_Would it be inconvenient if i asked Matthew to bring me something?_
Yes, his own consciousness answered.
Leave him alone.
_Yeah, a glass of water and the comfort of my bed it is then, how is that saying that my mother used to say? Sleep sustains_
A couple of minutes later he landed at his own bed, the darkness bracing his loneliness, he thought about turning on the tv and watching something but he knew it didn’t matter how much he wanted to he wouldn’t be able to stop his mind from wandering to the couple somewhere close, Matthew was never to far anyways. He just wanted peace and he would never get that comparing himself to that Mizi girl so he decided to lay down, scroll through his phone for a bit and then go to sleep, that girl would go and others would come, he knew that sentiment too well.
Terrible decision.
The first thing he saw when he, finally, got his phone was a text, or rather a lot of them, he opened Matthew’s chat being drowned by words
From: My first 💘
[11:06 pm] Bro u sure ur ok?
[11:26 pm] i can come over if u want me too we could watch something
[11:28 pm] im worried man u were weird, even Mizi noticed im a bit distracted today
[11:28 pm] if im not able to get laid tonight im blaming on u!!!!!!
[11:32 pm] also im sorry about the princess thing, if you want i can stop calling u that even if i really like it
[11:32 pm] u are my princess after all, yk that right gunwookie?
[11:44 pm] yoooo this restaurant is amazing, i’m bringing you here next weekend you’ll love it!!
[00:25 am] why arent you replying? 😪😔
[00:51 am] do you hate me?
[00:52 am] did i do something? did something happen?
[00:54 am] wait sorry u might be gaming since it’s friday night
[00:55 am] or u could be sleeping, u looked tired earlier
read
Gunwook peered at his phone, wondering if he should reply, he started typing, trying to explain himself and find an excuse but he stopped and deleted it, he opted for selfishness and decided that he would pretend to be asleep, next morning he could just tell Matthew he was way too tired and ended up falling asleep as soon as he got home.
So he closed Matthew’s chat without doing anything. He checked a few group chats, most of them not being important until he saw the dance class chat had a few new midias, he knew what was there among all the videos Hanbin sended so he looked for it.
Well, those who seek always find.
There it was again, that damn white tank top, those damn grey sweatpants, that damn messy hair.
And suddenly the right side of his brain took custody of his thoughts all over again, he felt his ears burning as he watched closely his hyung moving, his eyes darting at himself in the mirror, his cheeks a bit red and his mouth hanging a bit open from how concentrated he was.
He could feel his body being engulfed by heat from inside out so he paused the video.
“Not again Gunwookie, once is enough right? We’ve been there today!” - he said to himself, the left side of his brain trying to do its job and be reasonable - “Let’s not do this to feel guilty again after temporary pleasure” - he tried to reassurance.
So he closed the app and opened instagram, at first it was fine, Yujin posting a video dancing celebrating he was finally done with his finals, Jiwoong posting a picture of a steak at some fancy restaurant, Hanbin and Hao having a date night, his friend Taerae posting a video of himself singing a foreign song, a picture of a very angry Ricky posted by Gyuvin followed by many videos of Ricky complaining about how he fell once again on one of Gyuvin’s pranks, those were posted on his close friends.
And then Seok Matthew republished a story, it was his hand handing over a single rose to a very delicate hand, the picture was taken by the girl receiving it and Gunwook's heart shrunk as he analysed every single detail of that photo, her delightful nails painted a light pink, her many silver rings, her dainty bracelets.
*She* was a princess, definitely.
So he kept looking, also analyzing Matthew’s hand, the same hand that was squeezing his thigh earlier. He remembered Matthew’s text, “if I'm not able to get laid tonight I'm blaming you.”
“You know what? Fuck you Matthew! I’m not able to get laid NEVER thanks to you, all i can think about is you every second of every day and still...” - he could feel madness building it up, the heat that was burning him from inside before turning into something that got him in the verge of tears in the worse way possible - “...still i will never be enough, i will never be one of your girls it doesn’t matter how much i try, how much a i think about it.”
He knew it was pathetic, him saying that to the walls of his room, it was sad.
From: My first 💘
[01:48 am] are u up?
read
And when Gunwook felt a single tear roll down his face, right when he was about to give up on his sorrow another notification popped up, another one from Hanbin’s dance class.
From: Hao-ge 🐼
[01:49 am] Hanbin forgot to send this one, you got so much better Matt you look so good, if i was single i would definitely be drooling over you
[01:49 am] (video attached)
From: Hanbina
[01:49 am] ? wtf
In autopilot Gunwook opened the video, it was another video of Matthew on today's class, he was dancing to a song called Feel it by Michele Monroe, it was one of the songs Hanbin chose for them to warm up and Matthew freestyle was so good everyone left him dancing by himself in the middle of the studio, watching gagged, Gunwook included.
The way he moved was ungodly.
If Matthew was up then he definitely got laid, why would he still be up at that time? He probably asked if Gunwook was up because he was leaving that girl's apartment and wanted to go running to his best friend, not wanting to spend the rest of the night alone, he hated it.
Gunwook also hated it.
He hated to be the second option, to be the spared teddy bear for Matthew to hug after giving pleasure to those random girls he met.
He blinked fast as the song stretched on, Matthew dancing on the floor, his arms supporting the weight of his own body as he rolled up.
How strong were those arms? Would he be able to pick Gunwook up? Probably, most definitely yes.
Those flames that he felt earlier got back, worse than before.
He glared at his screen as Matthew moved back and fourth, getting up again still completely focused on his own reflection, obsessed.
Gunwook’s hand traveled to the waistband of his boxers, playing with it as he felt a bulge slowly growing, his sight still pierced at his phone, impure thoughts racing through his mind as his eyes accompanied every move.
His hand slipped inside the fabric, so affected that a moan escaped his lips.
He asked himself where Matthew was right now, what he was doing.
And a part of him felt at fault from thinking how his best friend had no idea what was going on inside Gunwook's room, how he would never know he wanted Matthew to treat him like he deserved to be treated, to embrace his nature and let his pleasure be the most sacred thing, to tame him.
His phone was still on playing the video once again as he lost his mind.
“Hyung” - he moaned as he started to stroke his cock, his eyes closing from how sensitive he was. - “Please, Matthew hyung”
“Gunwook?” - he heard his best friend’s voice saying just like before, his mind so dizzy that it felt real
He moaned once again, head falling back as the pleasure built up, the music was near the end but he didn’t need any video anymore, he had the image of Matthew’s body engraved behind his eyelids.
“Gunwook.” - he heard again, that voice itself could make him go insane.
“I promise that i’ll be good, i swear, please hyung, please” - Gunwook whimpered, holding himself from trusting the air, he wanted to last a little longer so…
A loud noise startled him like something fell on the ground, something metallic, like keys or keychains.
He let go of himself, opening his eyes with his heart pounding and then suddenly everything was in slow motion, he looked up and there was his best friend as red as a tomato staring at him, his mouth was opened as if he wanted to say something but his words were stolen.
Matthew was speechless, of course he was, so was Gunwook.
They were both silent for what it felt like forever, the only thing playing was the video on Gunwook’s phone, it was just the song but then suddenly everyone was clapping awaking Gunwook from his trance, he started blinking rapidly locking his phone and covering himself with the first thing he could find, the closest thing he got was a pillow.
“Hyung, i’m sorry, i- you- i mean- you were not supposed to see this, i’m really so sorry, oh my god i wanna kill myself” - Gunwook stuttered as he tried to find a way out of that situation.
He wanted to get up and leave, to hide.
This was unimaginable, Matthew would hate him, he would probably be disgusted.
What was he doing here anyways? Gunwook thought that since he didn’t respond Matthew would go back to his own place. Shit, he would never be able to look at Matthew ever again, he just lost his best friend thanks to his stupid lust. There was no going back, Matthew saw him moaning his name, jacking off to a video of him dancing, he would never dance in front of Gunwook after this, he was so screwed.
“What is this, what are you doing?” - Matthew asked, still not moving from where he was.
Gunwook felt his whole body burning from embarrassment. He wanted to say something like, are you for real right now? How was he supposed to answer that? Wasn’t it obvious what he was doing?
“What does this mean? Since when?” - Matthew asked this time, once he understood he would not get an answer to his previous questions.
“I’m sorry” - it was all Gunwook was able to reply, almost whispering as he stared at the pillow on his lap, he saw from the corner of his eye Matthew getting closer - “Don’t come near, please don’t do anything, i’m really sorry, i know you’re probably disgusted.”
Oh no, Gunwook was about to cry.
Matthew ignored him, getting close enough to cup his hand and make him look directly in his eyes.
“Don’t come near, are you crazy? What do you mean disgusted?” - Gunwook once again lost his power to speak - “Why are you crying, don’t cry babe, what happened?”
“What happened Matthew? What happened? Are you for real right now, what the fuck? My best friend just walked in and got me jerking off to a video of him, moaning his name, my straight best friend, and he is sitting here holding me as I try to cover up my boner with a pillow. Are you really asking me what happened? What is this, a sick joke to you hyung? You want me to feel MORE humiliated?” - Gunwook exploded.
“Oh c’mon princess, you look so cute like this, so clueless, it’s so hot. First of all, do you really think I'm straight? You really don't know me at all, do you?” - Matthew mocked caressing Gunwooks hair slowly, oh that was definitely some kind of torture - “Also, i dont know why you’re trying to hide your boner, did i told you to hide it princess?” - Gunwook gulped, shaking his head no. - “So do as I say and throw that pillow away right now so I can properly see you and your pretty body.”
Gunwook was so confused right now, was he dreaming?
“Hyung, don't mess with me please, it’s not funny, I'm really embarrassed.” - Gunwook whispered, tears threatening to fall from his eyes.
He was flooded with a bunch of mixed feelings and Matthew’s hand caressing his cheek to dry his tears was not helping.
“I would never mess with my Gunwookie, I thought you knew that” - Matthew whispered back, leaning closer - “Look me in the eyes babe, let me see you please.”
He continued and Gunwook was sure he was only able to hear because they were extremely close to each other. Gunwook finally looked up, stunned by Matthew’s soft smile, he was looking at him so fondly and he giggled as he watched Gunwook’s teary eyes.
Matthew moved, he was going to say something but Gunwook interrupted him.
“Why are you here? You were supposed to be with her.” - he said, his heart aching at his own tone, making it transparent how jealous he was, pathetic.
Matthew giggled once again.
“I had an issue princess, a big one, you know what?”- he got even closer as Gunwook nodded, brushing his lips on Gunwook’s cheek, kissing it before reaching to his ear. - “My body was there but my mind was somewhere else. My issue was that she… she was not you… None of them are… I couldn’t even kiss her.”
Gunwook stared at his best friend tremendously confused, he wanted to say once again that Matthew should stop messing with him but he didn’t have the time, before he could do anything Matthew’s hand covered his nape pulling him closer to finally end the distance between them, just a peck that lasted only a couple of seconds but from Gunwook’s point of view everything was in slow motion so for him, who waited so long for that moment, it was eternity.
When they parted Matthew smiled widely as he watched Gunwook’s stunned face, they were both in silence staring at each other, the younger one not knowing what to say.
“Hyung…”
“You know what babe? I know you’re embarrassed but I'm kinda glad I caught you like this, I've been wanting to tell you something for a long time.” - Matthew said stealing another peck before continuing - “I can’t keep denying every minute I think of you Gunwookie, I just can’t, but I was scared, I didn't want to ruin our friendship. I’ve been trying to go out with other people but you’re always the one in my mind, your face always there printed in my brain.”
He caressed Gunwook’s face, the younger one finally smiling a bit, his eyes zoning out as if he couldn’t believe what was going on, like he was dreaming.
“So what do you say princess? Can I cross the line?”
Gunwook didn’t answer, at least not with words, he closed their distance once again, shutting his best friend's lips, crashing his lips against his.
Matthew was stupefied with the sudden change of attitude, like before It started soft more like a peck since the younger one was nervous but even nervous Gunwook couldn’t hold back himself, not when he knew they both wanted that so badly, so he deepened the kiss fiercely.
The room started to get hotter and hotter as their greedy tongues eager to claim each other’s being, things escalated way too fast to as the older one slowly let his hands slip down touching every single part of his best friend’s body, he took his time to feel and appreciate his warm skin, if this was any other situation Gunwook would be terribly embarrassed since he was wearing nothing but boxers and the painful bulge was clearly visible but he couldn’t think straight, not when Matthew’s hands were grabbing under his thighs to pull him so he could sit on his lap.
“Wait Matt…” - He whispered, stopping the make out session going on
The silence was deafening.
“What babe?” - Matthew asked, trying his best not to sound impatient, he wanted his best friend to be comfortable.
“I don’t want you to be uncomfortable and i know i’m heavy…” - he said feeling a bit sad that his insecurities were coming to the surface, so he couldn’t finish the sentence he could not bring himself to say it.
But Matthew knew him better than anyone else in the world, he knew exactly what Gunwook was implying.
“Are you calling me weak, princess? Do you think I can not handle you?” - Matthew asked, the tone of his masquerading how amused he was by how vulnerable Gunwook looked on top of him.
His hands started traveling once again, this time coming up slowly. He smiled as Gunwook’s eyes closed with the mere touch, twitching and whimpering, holding himself back from moving from how Matthew’s palms felt stroking the muscles on his back coming up and down and then stopping on his ass for a while before coming up again to stop on his waist, holding it roughly.
“You’re so sensitive princess, it’s so endering.” - He leaned over leaving a peck on Gunwook’s lips, then kissing his cheek, then his jaw, coming down to his neck and the his collarbone. He wanted to kiss him everywhere. - “Gunwookie?” - Gunwook, with his eyes still closed, moaned in response. - “Is this your first time?”
Gunwook denied shaking his head, not opening his eyes.
“I need words, babe, look at me and answer." - Matthew demanded and Gunwook, of course did as he was told.
“No hyung, it’s not my first time.” - He answered looking directly at Matthew’s dark eyes, he waited for him to say something but nothing came, the older one looked like he was still waiting for more so Gunwook continued - “I lost my virginity in my last few weeks of high school okay? And I did have a fling at the beginning of college, I just… haven’t done it in a while.”
“Okay, you know we have to discuss this before doing anything right? So it’s good for both of us, and I needed to ask since you don’t usually talk about your experience.”
“I know, I don't have a lot of experience to be honest but I still have some, I didn't talk about it because I couldn't bring myself to, I'm way too shy and also I was in love with you so I was not comfortable for some reason.”
Gunwook’s cheeks were burning red and Matthew grinned squeezing his waist.
“Was? You’re not in love with me anymore?” - He mocked
“Hyung, you know that’s not what i mean…”
Matthew ignored the beat his heart skipped.
“Have you ever bottomed?” - Matthew asked, assuming that’s what Gunwook wanted, the good thing about making out with his best friend is that they had this weird way of almost reading each other’s thoughts.
“Uhm, once at my first time.” - Silence filled the space once again, Matthew formulating his next question - “If you’re trying to ask me if i want you to fuck me the answer is yes.” - he said holding back his giggles watching Matthew chuckle.
“You sure?”
“Hyung, i’ve never been so sure in my life.” - he leaned in again kissing Matthew’s earlobe whispering - “I want to rail me hyung, as if your life depends on it, if we're gonna ruin our friendship let’s make it worth it.”
That was enough to send Matthew into spiral, he captured Gunwook’s lips back, grasping his waist forcing him to grind in his lap. The older one was still clothed but Gunwook could feel the bulge under him, he could feel it for a while now but the movements made it even more noticeable.
The sensation of Matthew’s hands grabbing his naked waist made him tingle, it was a strange euphoric feeling finally having his best friend under him like that. His hand reached the buttons of Matthew’s shirt undoing them as fast as he could, as soon as the shirt was out he reach for the hem of that damn white tank top Matthew was wearing underneath taking that off as well, so finally his fingers opened Matthew’s jeans, he slipped his fist easily into Matthew’s underwear and the Canadian had to try his best to hold the whimper he almost let out, his head fell back as he bit his lip to prevent a moan to escape him. He could feel Gunwook’s erection poking his stomach though his boxer and that made his whole body shiver.
They were both so pent up, so impatient.
Matthew suddenly manhandled Gunwook switching their positions, he grabbed Gunwook placing him laying down on the mattress facing the ceiling, he grabbed Gunwook’s hair pulling in a way the younger one was tilting his head, displaying his neck do Matthew could access the most sensitive part of it, he leaned over licking it slowly down until he stopped at his nipple, he looked up to Gunwook to see his eyes fixed on every single movement Matthew was doing, not even blinking as he watched his best friend grin, he leaned down without breaking the eye contact, his tongue carefully circulating the areola before biting it lightly first and then a bit more strong just enough so it could hurt a little, Gunwook moaned loudly unconsciously reaching for Matthew’s hair but before he could nestle his finger Matthew let go, blowing it and that made Gunwook go completely crazy, Matthew laughed and moved back in a way he was away from the boy.
“Do you know what the traffic light system is Gunwookie?” - Gunwook nodded - “Words princess.”
“Yes hyung.”
“Are you comfortable with using it?” - Gunwook nodded once again and Matthew sighted - “What colour are you in right now?”
“Green hyung.” - Gunwook whimpered impatiently, moving so he could try to feel Matthew’s touch somewhere.
“Let me know if that changes, okay?” - Gunwook nodded - “Words Park Gunwook, i need you to use your words or else we are not doing this.”
“Yes hyung, i swear i’ll let you know.”
“Good girl.”
Matthew moved closer again leaning down, placing his knee between Gunwook’s legs, he knew the boy wouldn’t be able to resist rubbing against him to try finding some relief and that’s exactly what happened.
Being honest, that scene itself could make Matthew cum, his best friend was looking like a babbling mess, moaning and whining, shaking himself looking a bit overstimulated already so he let Gunwook do his thing for a while, watching his pretty princess almost humiliating himself, his face heating up his whimpers getting louder and louder, his bulge getting bigger, but as much as Matthew loved to watch his particularly filthy show he couldn’t resist any longer.
He got up from the bed, taking out the rest of his clothes and Gunwook’s and throwing it somewhere on the floor, the younger one yelped when his fingers tugged the fabric of his underwear pulling them out revealing his very hard dick.
“Lube’s on the night stand drawer.” - Gunwook mumbled and without saying anything Matthew got it.
He grabbed Gunwook’s legs and opened wide, eyeing him as the younger tried to cover his face with his hand from embarrassment, he felt exposed.
“Keep them open like this for me, okay princess? And put those hands down so I can see your face, be a good girl and look at me.” - Matthew demanded and Gunwook did as he was told once again. - “Colour?”
“Green.” - Gunwook babbled, blinking rapidly, trying to focus his eyes where he should, his hyung.
Matthew nodded, opening the bottle and smearing his fingers before pressing two of them inside slowly. He watched as Gunwook’s head fell back, eyes squinting, his legs spread wide, sinking them in, teasing the younger with how slowly he explored his insides, he would scissor him and then take then get to a steady pace, knuckling deep inside him, Gunwook’s eyes wandering as he tried to hold back his whines.
He observed Gunwook’s trembles as he slid another one, letting him lose himself in this sensual rhythm. The sight of his precious princess was blissful as he curled his fingers deep inside him, reaching the sensitive spot making Gunwook tremble even more, moaning loudly.
“Hyung, I need you, please… I want you inside me.” - Gunwook begged eagerly, his eyes teary as Matthew kept moving his fingers, faster this time.
“Say that again princess, tell me how much you want me?”
“You hyung, i want you please, please, i want you so much, i promise i’ll be good just fuck me.”
Oh how Matthew loved to see that, he was loving to break Gunwook apart like that, his filthy angel. How could he say no to that?
So he changed positions once again, sitting with his back against the headboard, Gunwook looked at him confused so he slapped his own thighs grinning.
“You want it don’t you? You’ll have to work for it, come on.”
So Gunwook positioned himself on top of his best friend placing his hands at Matthew’s shoulders squeezing his muscles as he sinked down, his face twisting between pleasure and pain as he felt himself being filled, Matthew’s hands were firm on Gunwook’s waist forcing him down as he squeezed his eyes closed and his mouth gaping.
Gunwook was a mess.
When he finally knew Matthew was fully inside him he stopped for a few minutes, trying to get used to the feeling, Matthew reached for his cheek, caressing carefully, pulling his hands and kissing both of them before leaning to his face, kissing both his cheeks, his eyes that were closed, his lips and then lastly his forehead, that last one lasted for a long time before the older one stopped and whispered.
“You okay, my love?” - His voice sounded so tender, Gunwook’s heart skipped a beat.
_My love_
“Yes hyung.”
“Can we keep going or do you need some time to adjust?” - he asked, brushing off the strands of hair that were stuck onto Gunwook’s forehead.
“No, we can keep going, I'm fine.” - Gunwook whispered, finally opened his eyes.
“Okay, great.” - Matthew also whispered, smiling as he kissed Gunwook’s forehead again.
And suddenly his eyes got darker again, Gunwook gulped as reached for his cock stroking slowly, almost torturously in a way that brought Gunwook back to that whimpering mess, his other hand gripped tightly on Gunwook’s hair pulling it just enough to make him squeal, he grinded up going deeper inside the younger, making him moan.
“C’mon princess, you’re already squirming when you haven't even started riding me properly yet? So pathetic. Will you be able to last?” - Matthew mocked and Gunwook groaned
“I’m sorry hyung, i already came once today thinking about you i don’t know if i will last long.”
“Oh, did you princess? And who allowed you to cum hm? I don’t remember giving you permission.” - Matthew tightened the grip on both Gunwook’s cock and hair - “You’re not allowed to cum unless I say so, do you understand princess? Now be a good girl for me and start moving, take it all.”
“Yes, hyung.” - he said shuddering when Matthew pulled him closer kissing his neck, and even though the older boy was really trying to hold together he couldn’t contain himself from stifling his moans he best he could, burying his face in Gunwook’s neck as his scent invaded his senses.
“You’re so cute Gunwookie, so pretty.” - Gunwook threw his head behind, trying to hide how flushed he was - “Why are you trying to hide? Are you embarrassed?” - A whimper was the only answer he got - “You weren’t that embarrassed before you knew I was here, so desperate and needy watching my video.”
Matthew tightened his grip around Gunwook’s waist pulling him down, against his own body, going deeper.
Gunwook’s mind swirled, Matthew’s skin was so warm against his own, he was so turned on he could feel his cock leaking desperately between them, Matthew smirked as Gunwook unconsciously moved faster and faster, eyes rolling, whimpering, he was such a mess, so desperate for Matthew’s cock.
Matthew’s jaw clenched tightly as he watched Gunwook bounce the best he could, messy and uncoordinated, trying to make it work as tears ran down his face.
“You’re doing so good, princess, taking it so well, such a good girl for your hyung.” - Gunwook hiccuped, crying even harder, he was feeling so good, so high.
“Hyung, i’m not lasting much longer” - he tried to say but the words were muffled by his moans and sobs
“So sensitive, is it too much already babe? Keep going, bounce that pretty ass for me.” - Matthew demanded and Gunwook obeyed, moving his hips, mind hazy. - You’re so pretty when you cry, my love, it makes me want to cum just by looking at you.”
“You feel… So good” - Gunwook said, struggling to speak and bounce - “I… Cum.”
“You wanna cum babe? Already.” - Matt asked, smirking as he packed Gunwook’s lips, wrapping his hand gently around Gunwook’s cock, he pressed his thumb over the head.
_Oh God, did he wanted? No, he needed it._
Gunwook let out a loud moan
“Only when you…” - he whined
“Oh, you wanna do it together?” - Gunwook nodded desperately - Okay, squeeze tighter then, don’t stop, you can do it, make me cum with you,” - He shook his head, doing as told fucking himself as he shivered, everything was way too much, a part of him still thinking he was probably imagining the whole thing.
Matthew fucked his hips into him even harder, arms now wrapped around his torso, Gunwook’s cock now forgoten completely wet, hurting with pleasure.
Gunwook’s stamina was almost over so Matthew had to help him move, the older one now not being able to hold back his own moans.
“Go on princess, you’ve been good.” - Matthew said
“But you-” - Gunwook tried to asked but he was interrupted, the whiniest “Oh Gunwookie” leaving his best friend’s lips as he filled the younger boy with his cum, he fucked the boy even deeper, letting his head fall onto Gunwook’s shoulder.
Such a beautiful sound, a beautiful sight, a dream.
Gunwook couldn’t hold back any longer, almost biting Matthew’s shoulder as he came all over his own tummy, he could feel the faint smile on Matthew’s lips.
They were both breathing heavily when they finally looked each other in the eyes, both dripping sweat, red cheeks.
“Is this a dream?” - Gunwook whispered when he saw Matthew’s hand reaching to his hair, tugging his hair behind his ear (or at least trying to) - “I feel like it’s a dream, like i’ll wake up at any moment and be by myself, and you’ll be gone.”
“No babe, it’s not. Believe me, I'm never leaving” - Matthew whispered back, kissing him tenderly.
“I love you.” - Gunwook let slip, a whisper that if they weren’t so close Matthew wouldn’t even be able to hear it, his eyes going huge right after he noticed what he just said, shit.
Matthew giggled, leaning in and kissing him again.
“I love you too, my Gunwookie.”