Chapter Text
Shinonome Akito was in love. Of course he was in love, he'd always been. It was at first sight, maybe five? Six? Years ago, now. His to-be partner's voice rang out through the bustling, busy street, catching the attention of many and himself. He was new, maybe not to music since his pitch was perfect, but definitely new to street singing. That voice, that drive, pulled Akito towards the dual-blue haired boy like a moth to a flame. And that day, so very long ago, was when he'd first caught fire. He felt a spark, one much different from the flames that had ignited from his middle school memories. That legendary night. He still remembered the crowds vividly cheering, moshing around, singing the lyrics and hyping up the room like nothing he'd ever felt before. Seeing this boy gave him that same rush of excitement. He HAD to have him by his side to surpass his dreams. To be the team that looked out over a crowd of equal- no, of even bigger lights and cheers. That dream, that spark, lit something in Aoyagi Touya too. And so, hand in hand, they'd become partners.
Tracking back to the present day, Akito is watching his partner mess with claw machines in the arcade. He'd never really been good at claw machines, he lacked the patience and the coins since he'd preferred games like skeeball and first-person shooters. This would likely be the last game of the night. It was getting late, and they had practice with the rest of their team in the morning. Selfishly, he wished that maybe they could just spend forever like this, enjoying each other's company without ever having to leave. Those past years had all felt like a blur, but it was a blur with a strong hue of blue. Blue, like his partner's hair, his room, blue like how he'd felt when Touya wasn't around.
Touya's voice snaps him out of his thoughts.
"Akito, look. I got the plushie! Do you think Saki-san would like it?"
In Touya's hands was a soft yellow penguin. But his eyes fell elsewhere. His partner beamed at him, with the most beautifully excited smile he'd ever seen, eyes bright and sparkling. And right then, Akito felt his heart stop. He'd seen Touya smile before, many times. He'd seen how his partner had grown from struggling to show emotions to someone who loved to smile. But nothing made his partner glow more than when he found a gift to give to his loved ones. Oh, yeah, Touya asked him something. He has to respond. Akito coughs to get his thoughts back in order, and tries his best to ignore the burning sensation in his cheeks and ears.
"Ah, yeah. Prolly. Her n' her band like phennies, don't they? S'pretty close to the mascot." Akito gestures vaguely to the penguin, and starts to head towards the exit.
"Looks like we're out of coins. Let's go home for the day, Touya."
"Right. Akito, I've been meaning to ask. Is it alright if I stay at your place tonight? My father has been pretty tense as of recently, and it is putting both me and my mother on edge. I haven't been able to sleep much."
Akito's gaze softens as he turns back to look at his best friend. Touya and his old man have always been on pretty rocky terms, so rough patches were frequent. It isn't the first, and definitely not the last time Toya had visited his house for a sleepover.
"You ain't even gotta ask. Y'know mom's always happy to have ya around. Should we stop by your place to get a change of clothes, or...?" He trails off. Part of him really, really, REALLY wanted Touya to say no. After all, he had plenty of spare hoodies and oversized t-shirts that he was sure would look perfect on him-
Wait, what the hell was he thinking? They're not dating. Wouldn’t that be weird?
Akito had never actually confessed his feelings. Not when Touya already had plenty of other girls fawning over his beauty. It irritated him. Touya was his partner, wasn't he? But he knew deep down that as of right now, and likely for the foreseeable future, Touya didn't truly belong to him. Not his heart, not his body, not his time. Would that be all that they'd ever be? Partners onstage, and nothing more than friends otherwise?
"If at all possible, I would like to avoid my house. If I go inside, I will likely be roped into cleaning the entire house or another chore." Touya hugs the plushie tighter to his chest as he speaks, using his hand to shield its head from the falling snowflakes. He didn't want to get his gift for his sister wet, after all. That was just about the cutest thing Akito's ever seen, though. His partner, all bundled up and cozy as it snows peacefully, clinging to his prize. The city lights glow behind him, giving him a soft golden hue.
If Akito's heart stopped any more than this, he may as well need to be resuscitated.
"Sure. Let's head back quickly. S'cold as fuck." He smiles warmly despite the chill against his nose and cheeks, but only for a moment. Then he quickly tucks the lower half of his face into his scarf, hoping that the cold hadn't made his cheeks look too red. That'd be rather embarrassing. He didn't particularly enjoy people seeing him blush. It made him feel vulnerable, and that was the last thing Akito wanted anyone to see from him- even Touya. On an impulse, or maybe a desire that had been growing for years, Akito reaches out to take Touya's hand in his own. And then he stops, just an inch away from the other's fingertips. Nerves get the best of him, and like the utter coward he is, he decides against it at the very last second and quickly pulls back. To his simultaneous relief and disappointment, Touya doesn't seem to notice.
The rest of the walk home was in comfortable silence. At least, it seemed comfortable to Touya, who'd been thinking about what movie they could watch later tonight together. He knew Akito wasn't the biggest fan of horror. Action and fantasy were much more his style, like the mangas he reads. The Chainsaw Man movie should be in theaters, actually. Tomorrow after practice perhaps he'll buy tickets for everyone in their team. It would be a nice outing.
Akito, on the other hand, would have been chewing his fingernails clean off if it weren't for his gloves. It almost felt like a betrayal to have Touya over when his feelings for the other were at an all-time high. Would Touya be disgusted if he found out? What would happen to their friendship? More than anything, more than his dreams, he didn't want to lose his partner. Not to something so fragile like his own emotions. Gnawing on the inside of his lower lip tensely behind his scarf, he casts his eyes down, hoping maybe that if he ignored his heartbeat in his own eardrums then this overwhelming affection and vulnerability would go away.
Of course, it doesn't. It never does, never did. He doesn't get much of a chance to dwell on it any longer, though, nearly tripping over his doorsteps to clumsily unlock the front door of his house. The smell of warm curry udon hits his nose and warms his face, snowflakes falling away from his frozen cheeks noiselessly.
"Akito! Just in time. Dinner's ready. Oh, my, is that Touya-kun? There's plenty for you, too, so come eat to your heart's content." Akito's mother peeks around the wall from the kitchen, a warm smile on her face. Ginger locks cascade down her face, framing her olive eyes. Did Akito's dad's genes even try?
Obviously not.
They kick off their shoes neatly and head inside.