Chapter Text
Wrong, everything felt wrong. It felt wrong even though Jeongin couldn’t explain it properly — like, what exactly is wrong?
“It’s okay, Jeongin-ah.” Seungmin’s grip on his shoulder tightened, his voice soft and coaxing, “It’s not your fault. It was never your fault. Everything’s gon— ”
Jeongin couldn’t help but slap Seungmin’s cheek. He was noisy. Too noisy. He just realized what he just did to the elder — oh, no. He did something wrong again.
“Hyung, I’m sorry — ”
Seungmin slapped him back, the smile still lingering on his face. The smile he always showed Jeongin. No — to everyone. Seungmin always smiled all the time.
Jeongin groaned softly, touching his cheek for a moment. It hurt — but this was better. He deserved to feel pain. He should feel pain.
“Does it hurt?” Seungmin asked, cupping his cheek. “Hm? Does it hurt, Baby?”
Slowly, he nodded, avoiding Seungmin’s lingering gaze. He was scared.
“It hurts, right? Sorry,” Seungmin said, ruffling his hair softly. “I didn’t mean to.”
“I’m the one who… apologized.”
“Oh, this?” He pointed to the red mark on his own cheek, “Don’t worry. It doesn’t hurt, Iyen-ah. You would never hurt me.”
“Sorry… I’m sorry. You shouldn’t be here. You shouldn’t be with me. I — I’m just going to destroy you — because…”
“Because you’re too in love me.”
And that’s right. When Jeongin looked up, there was a look he rarely showed anyone. A look that Seungmin knew very well meant love. “And I destroy what I love.” His voice trembled as he whispered.
“So do I. I think we can destroy each other.” Seungmin said softly with the same smile. He approached Jeongin again, slowly embracing him. “It’s okay, Iyen-ah. I don’t mind.”
“But I — I don’t deserve to be loved. I’m not worth it.”
“That’s what I thought about myself too. But you said you’d stand by me no matter what I do; no matter how many bad sides I have — that I show you, right? You said you’d be by my side every day, every moment until we die. You made me believe in love again, Iyen-ah. You deserve me as much as I deserve you. We just need to stay in our way — like this, and everything will be okay. It’s a promise.”
Is it really love? Is it really love that they need?
It is. Specifically, it’s Seungmin’s love — Seungmin’s heart.
It would always be more than enough for him to escape from this feeling of guilt and emptiness. Jeongin closes his eyes, letting Seungmin kiss his teary cheeks. “I love you, Hyung.”
“I know.”