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The doors to the ER crashed open and Connie’s voice rang out strong as she led the stretcher into the centre of the fray.
“Male, 19, caught in an explosion of an as of yet unidentified fuel source. Lower right leg fracture. Superficial second degree burns to the right side of his body. Lacerations to his left shoulder from shrapnel. Pain 9/10 on the scene, settled to 5/10 with 10mg oxynorm,” her voice carried throughout the chaos of the bay. “Patient is alert but not oriented. GCS estimated at 12. BP 110/74 and dropping, pulse 120, suspected hypovolemia, received 500mLs saline in the field.” Across the room, Dr Snyder, head of Trauma snapped to attention. His military training was never more obvious than when he had a disaster to manage.
“Lee, take him to trauma one, now!” His voice was a harsh bark, “I want a group and save and crossmatch now. Someone page Maxwell, I want that fracture visualised and I want a CT head, I want Briggs on standby if we stabilise him. Any work on ID?”
“Dr Snyder!” Ruri’s voice pitched up as she watched Connie wheel the patient through to the trauma centre, “It’s Senku!”
“What? Again!” Stanley cursed under his breath, brushing his blonde hair back off his forehead, “This is the third time this week!”
“He’s actually gone and done it this time...holy fuck,” ER security came to see their frequent flyer, Officer Yo’s eyes wide, “He really blew himself up.”
“I’ll blow you up...stupid...guy...” The teen on the trolley mumbled, weakly pointing at Yo with an accusatory finger, “Boom.”
“Alright, no gawkers. Someone page paediatrics.”
“But..sir?” Nurse Luna’s soft voice came from beside him, “The patient is 19?”
“Yeah, but if this little shit thinks he can get himself blown up and have me NOT call his dad, he’s got another thing coming!”
By the time Byakuya made it down to the ER, they had Senku sat up and - mostly - talking sense as Dr Bony from Plastics debrided his burns.
“Really, it was fine. I just added a little too much alcohol, next time I’ll be much more careful,” he’d been lecturing Charlotte and Maya on his fuel as they evaluated his body, considering surgery. When his dad burst into the room though, his lecture died in his throat. “Bya-Dad...really I’m fine.”
“SENKUUUUUU!” Byakuya tried to launch himself across the small room onto his son, stopped only by the strong arms of one Stanley Snyder.
“Ishigami, cool it. He’s injured enough. Briggs is gonna take him to set the leg once Professor Wingfield has reviewed his head CT.”
“He hit his head?!” Byakyua shrieked, and gone was the sweet natured, calm paediatric doctor and here was the panicked parent they had to wrangle.
“Ugh, does anyone care about me, the patient? Byakuya isn’t even my emergency contact anymore, I gave that duty to the Oaf,” Senku protested, “If they put me under, I better get pudding when I wake up. Getting exploded makes a guy ten billion percent hungry, you know?”
“Yeah, we gotta get this leg set, is Dr X back yet?”
“Still calling me that delightful nickname?” Prof Wingfield's deep voice filled the room, cool as marble. “How is my best patient?”
“Cool as a cucumber, Stanley’s just mad because I can’t remember who’s president.”
“In all fairness, he didn’t know that before the accident,” Byakuya was hanging off Stanley in a mimicry of a cuddle, wiping his tears against the other man’s scrubs. He sniffled and looked up at the neurologist, “Give it to me straight doc, how long does he have left? Tell me Xeno, will I have to bury my boy?”
“Honestly, how inelegant, Dr Ishigami. You’re a medical professional, use that brain of yours,” Prof Wingfield slapped Byakuya round the back of the head with the folder he was holding, “If I thought Senku’s brain was at risk, I wouldn’t be wasting my time on pleasantries. His CT is clean, by some miracle his head was spared any injury,” Xeno huffed, rolling his eyes, “Which you’d know, Dr Snyder, if you ever bothered to learn how to read your own scans.”
“Hey, lil Senku’s special, he gets the best of the best,” Stanley smirked, “Alright Maya, he’s all yours. I’ll see him in recovery once you’ve got it set. Luna, you’re on prep. Everyone else, clear out.”
Connie was back not one hour later, “Patient is Mozu Akatsuki, Male, 20, MMA competitor, compound fracture of radius and ulna proximal to the wrist, not reduced in field due to pain 10/10 on manipulation even with Entonox. Bleeding mostly stopped for now.”
“Another fracture, Ortho will be happy, trauma three is free,” Snyder gestured, not even looking up from the system as he focused on their incomings, “Page Chrome for the portable x-ray, bed two needs a chest whilst he’s here and he’s one-to-one with Kinrou, he keeps trying to abscond.”
“Is it Mr Kaseki again? I picked him up last week for a delirium, have you checked his urine?” Connie asked, already wheeling her current patient - a young man with dreadlocks and facial tattoos, cradling a very bloody, very broken arm. Beside him was a pale-haired older man wearing a fabric face mask and looking...annoyed? Something about his posture had Stanley standing up a little straighter. His clothes certainly fit the criteria for sensei of a dojo, but the way he looked at the young man with the broken arm was just a tad off student-teacher.
“Luna dipped it, but at his age protein is a given. Micro have the samples, for now I’m running a stat gent,” Stanley gestured vaguely, “He’s given Yo the slip three times now so I’ve got Kin sitting with him, waiting for Nikitin to come down and see if he can catheterise the old coot. Saionji already had a go, but his prostate is the size of an apple and he’s in retention.”
“Cool, cool. Just checking in. He’s a sweetheart but a troublemaker,” she laughed, “Oh by the way, gotta do safeguarding for this guy as well,” she came over to the main desk, “Ruri can you call them down?”
“Safeguarding, oh no. What happened?” Ruri asked, eyes wide with concern even as she grabbed the phone.
“Nah, just standard stuff. Apparently, the shady Sensei guy that broke his arm is his boyfriend. Just covering the bases,” Connie whispered, eyes bright as she recounted the gossip, pointing over to the masked man who, for his part, was holding the guy’s non-broken hand.
“Great, just what I need. More drama...Magma, go find Chrome and that damned x-ray, I want tall, dark and handsome over there off my floor before this becomes my problem.”
“Patient is 25-year-old Chelsea Childe, presents with fever, nausea and vomiting and swelling of the left leg. Swelling marked approx ten minutes ago, erythema has not spread. Recent travel to South America, including Peru and Bolivia. Covid test negative on arrival, had just started unpacking...” Connie was back again, this time without a fracture and instead with a bit of a mystery case. They’d had Childe attend before and she’d always posed a challenge to the interns, first with Dengue fever, then leishmaniasis and once memorably from being stung by a platypus.
“Do we have a differential?” Stanley clicked his fingers at one of the interns nearby, a well-built girl with golden hair. He couldn’t remember her name...but wasn't she Ruri’s younger sister? She was already examining the patient, looking over her vitals as Connie led them towards one of the quarantine bays.
“DVT triggered by endocarditis?” She suggested, blue eyes narrowed in thought,
“Think more laterally, use the information we have on Miss Childe’s background,” Stanley reminded.
“Shit, sir...” Kohaku, that was her name, looked up, eyes wide as she held Chelsea's leg, “I think she was bit by a snake...” She pointed to two pinhead wounds in her thigh, right at the centre of the swelling,
“Fuck. Okay, someone call Micro for our South America polyspecific anti-venom, Dr Kohaku, I hope you’re ready for a crash course in patient history taking!”
“Dr Snyder, the safeguarding team are here!” Ruri’s chirpy voice carried over from her desk,
“Send them in to see Mr Akatsuki, I don’t have time to hold hands and ask if he feels safe at home...and can someone get me an update on Senku? I need to know when Briggs will be free to set that arm!”
“On it, sir!” She turned back to her computer, typing furiously.
Connie just wouldn’t let Stanley catch a break and he was at his damned wits end as she wheeled in none other than frequent-flier Nanami Ryusui.
“19-year-old Nanami Ryusui, brought in from Omicron Omega Sigma house, sixth admission this year alone...unidentified object lodged in rectum.”
“Connie...tell me you are joking, isn’t this the kid that gave half the campus Mono last month?” Stanley grit his teeth, jaw aching. He’d just sent Moz off to have his arm set and casted and now this clown was back? He didn’t know if he wanted to scream or kill someone...maybe both. Maybe he could get the other Mr Akatsuki to do it for him. “What’s the story here?” he barked at the blonde man lying face down on the stretcher. He was naked bar a blanket covering his modesty and reeked of cheap booze and sweat.
“’Twas a double dare...s’hazing...” The youth wobbled, eyes hazy and unfocused.
“For fuck’s sake, okay, Connie get him transferred onto a bed, get Kyoko and Chrome down to evaluate, get Asagiri up from psych to evaluate this idiot. And someone call his next of kin!”
“On it!” Ruri’s voice was a soft squeak, and she hurriedly typed away on her computer.
Two minutes later a stream of curses in an unfamiliar language came from across the ER where their Agency IT tech was fixing their Medi-Mat. The dark-haired man stormed across to the blonde moron still lying in the bed and screeched,
“REALLY RYUSUI? THIS IS THE SIXTH TIME THIS YEAR!” Stanley snorted a t the sight and glanced at their receptionist, eyebrow raised. Ruri gave the pair a fond smile,
“Aww, sibling bonds...”
“Sure...” Stanley sighed, “Place $20 on it being a trophy of some kind, call up Xe and see what he wants to bet on.” He turned away as she gave him an affirmative, giggling under her breath as she documented their betting pool on just what Nanami had shoved up his ass.
He was pretty sure he had it right. It was always something extra stupid with the frat-boys.
“Mr Nanami, am I correct in assuming our IT guy is your next of kin?” Before the other blonde could talk, the older man held up his hand,
“Don’t even speak...I’m his next of kin. Just tell me how soon this thing can be out of him and how much it is going to cost...I’ll write you a cheque and I’ll make a hefty donation to the hospital if you tell me as few details as possible. Can you do that?” Stanley gave him a smirk, rich boys wanted to throw money around? He could play ball.
“I can.”
It was hours before he’d made it back to check on Senku and his hysterical father. By now the twerp had gathered a small audience of family and friends around him. Taiju was there with a baby strapped to his chest – he couldn’t remember its name or when Yuzuriha had popped but he was relieved all the same, meant her maternity leave was closer to being over and he could finally have back one of his best damned interns, her suture technique was revolutionary. Lillian was there, though she was less comforting Senku and more supporting her husband, who despite being a grown ass man and medical professional was still sobbing hysterically on and off about his only son being blown up. Naturally Suika had tagged along as well and was sat on the bed with Senku, already doodling on his temporary cast. At some point the ER OT, Tsukasa Shishou had stopped by to evaluate Senku’s mobility and had ended up pulled into an argument about the different benefits of various walking aids Senku could use in his recovery. Stanley had a begrudging respect for the other man, if only because they sparred in the hospital gym occasionally and they had earned each other's respect with their fists like real men. Having heard her brother, doctor and favourite visitors had come to see her partner-in-admission, Mirai had snuck away from the paediatric wing, wheeling her little IV stand to join Suika in decorating Senku’s cast (she’d stolen a roll of star stickers, and Stanley decided not to ask where they were from).
Topping it all off was Gen Asagiri – who was meant to be bothering ass-play frat-boy – who was instead murmuring conspiratorially with his husband regarding how to stop Senku self-discharging and blowing himself up again, a battle he knew was futile, but they’d try anyway. Still the psychologist seemed to think he could get him on at least a 48-hour psych hold and honestly, Stanley would sign off on it if it kept Senku somewhere safe for a few days.
He stepped into the bedspace, making room for himself and putting an arm around Xeno, head landing on his shoulder in surrender. A soft hand came up to stroke through his hair, and he heard a soft chuckle, that deep voice like honey to his ears,
“I see we’re husbands again...what time did your shift end?”
“Ten minutes ago,” he replied, voice betraying his exhaustion as he let Xeno offer comfort, “how’s the boy?”
“His brain is intact, though I fear he may drown in his father’s tears if Byakuya doesn’t calm down...”
“I see he’s gathered quite the crowd, think we can slip away?”
“Can you meet me in our usual on-call room?”
“I can.”
Stanley hated a lot of things. No smoking on hospital grounds. Ginro’s constant whining. The smell of C Diff. Having to treat homophobic old ladies he’d much rather just let die.
But now, he had a new number one hate. Namely, Nanami Ryusui. Frat boy. The Typhoid Mary of WCU Campus Mono. A man who had once presented with the WORST case of chlamydia Stanley had ever seen, and a man who he fucking hoped was clean considering what he’d been forced to witness.
A man who currently had his middle-aged, divorcee, dad-of-two, ultrasound-tech, co-worker and closest work-friend, Ukyo splayed out on his FAVOURITE on-call bed being rammed into by a dick that Stanley had not two months ago been swabbing for every bacteria known to man (and possibly some as of yet unknown).
He backed out, letting the door fall closed and stared for a moment at the unoccupied sign that was still showing. He reached up, shock numbing him as he slid the bar across, so it instead declared ‘occupied’ and turned in time to see his husband come down the corridor.
On second thoughts, a nice hot bath followed by a military shower and the silk sheets of their own bed was much more appealing than ever stepping foot in that on-call room again.
He grabbed Xeno’s arm and wheeled him towards the parking lot, “Please tell me I’m old enough to retire.”
“Oh Stan, you wouldn’t last two days.”