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Will never thought he would be spending the end of the world in the one place he avoided stepping foot inside of at any and all cost in his teenage years.
Hawkin’s Presbyterian Church.
It was the closest building they could stumble into, Mike’s arm around Will’s shoulder as he limped through the pain. Mike hadn’t seen it coming, a rogue vine, though he was certain all the vines were rouge in the Upside Down. It had taken a chunk out of his ankle. Turns out his limp was a regular limp after all. Nancy would be pleased to know he indeed gave it his all with his performance at the hospital.
Will had already radioed to the others during their frantic stagger to find shelter. Hop instructed them to remain where they were, wait for the signal, once the others had everything prepared they would rendezvous. If Mike was mobile that is.
Will helped Mike slump unceremoniously into the nearest pew, gasping in pain.
Will had already made a beeline for what appeared to be the minister's office in hopes of finding a first aid kit. He returned with a flask and what appeared to be the altar cloth.
“We will have to improvise a little” Will said holding up the lack luster supplies nervously “ please don’t pass out on me” he added seeing how pale Mike had gone giving him a gentle shake.
Will carefully removed Mike’s sneaker so he could get a better look at the wound. Will couldn't completed hide his reaction. There wasn't much he could hide anymore.
"Well at least it stopped bleeding" He tried to give Mike a reassuring smile.
“Are you sure that's safe?” Mike still pale and wincing as Will examined his wound, asked referring to the flask.
“No and it will probably burn like hell if I am being honest” Without any indication of his next move, Will grasped Mikes ankle and doused the wound entirely. Mike clutched hard on the back of the pew and reached out with his other hand grabbing Will’s shoulder even harder as if to push him off but Will held firm finishing the job. He bit down on his scream knowing they were still in enemy territory and couldn’t risk their position to any nearby minions.
“No warning or anything?” Mike looked at Will half furious and half laughing.
“Sorry, better this way, its over now. And it already looks better” Will said as he was now wrapped Mike’s ankle with the linen altar cloth, adjusting it so not to cut off the circulation. Mike’s hand was still gripping Will’s shoulder.
“How did you know?” Before silence had begun to fill the empty church. And it was becoming to much to endure for Will, very aware of the precariously intimate position he was in. The air hung thick with it. Will was adjusting Mike’s make shift bandage when that question came tumbling out. One of the many questions that Will was aware had been hanging between them for the last several hours, finally expelled into the silence of the echoing church, the sound bouncing off the walls enveloping him with a feeling of dread. The question made Will feel small. Exposed. Vulnerable. All the feelings he was trying to avoid when he first told the others his truth.
I am different. The memory is still fresh, the wound though healing still exposed to the open air. He could feel the sting of it. The memory of a dagger he had removed. The throb of his own heartbeat pulsing around its coagulating edges. He wished he had his own altar cloth.
It had been a long time coming, his confession that is. He knew it. It didn't make it any easier. And it was forced out of him by a monster that had haunted him, stalked him, and controlled and used him in ways that deep down he blamed himself for.
The tunnels. Max... Bob.
It's not how he wanted it to occur. He wished he had just told his mom and Jonathan long ago, maybe Mike too someday down the road. But he knew at this very point in time, he had no time and no choice. It had to be then, he refused to let Henry out him. To use his most intimate secret against him. To back him into a corner as he so often did.
He came out on his terms. He tried to convince himself of this. When he was stuck between a rock and a hard place, he chose the hard place. Laid himself bare for all to see.
Did he see? Did Mike truly see? What did he see?
Will finished adjusting the cloth and pulled Mike’s jeans back over his ankle and sat back against the pew creating much needed distance between them that the question had created. He still felt the phantom touch of Mike’s hand gripping his shoulder. Guilt settled where his hand had been, and began to spread throughout his body no doubt showing scarlet on his face. He hoped it was dark enough that Mike wouldn’t notice. Probably wishful thinking.
Will shook himself out of the brief dissociation he had just endured and replied “that I didn’t like girls? I think I always knew” not making eye contact, hoping he was coming off nonchalant and confident but very aware of how his breath caught and shook. He had hoped that now it was all out in the open that it could just be a blip in their friendship, an unspoken truth between that they could continue to not address. They would go off to college, maybe together, maybe separately, but Will would keep in touch, and later attend Mike’s wedding and get to know his children and Mike would attend his art shows in New York and praise his talent, and they would go on to be functioning adults who sent letters and Christmas cards. All would be well.
They could just carry on like nothing had changed.
“ no…how did you know that…he wasn’t like you?”
Something had changed.
Will froze. He was sweating. Hyper aware of his skin and the feeling his throat made when he swallowed. Did he even hear him correctly?
“What?” What?
“ The person. Your…crush. The one you said you had. You said he wasn’t like you. How did you know?” Mike said with more confidence this time. Will wished he could bottle that confidence and drink it so he could have this conversation without having a full blow panic attack.
“ oh um, well..” he was trying to pick his words with care, so afraid of ruining the friendship. So afraid to answer the question.
They both sat quite still on the pew, Mike staring at Will, Will not meeting his eye, still contemplating on how to reply. Mike finally looked away. Will sensed he was about to push further and he braced for impact.
“Who's Tammy?” Mike ventured.
Will was able to slow his breathing with that, hoping that Mike didn’t pick up how nervous he was. He was able to gather his thoughts for the first time in minutes “Well, I have this friend” he said shifting to face Mike, a bold choice he instantly regretted since he noticed Mike's questioning stare. Will added “like actually a friend, not me, but whose like me, well I guess not completely like me but she uh, told me about how she had this crush, they were classmates and how she was completely obsessed and how it ruined her life for a while because it didn’t work out, but how she realized that was okay and it was for the best and how it made her realize that it was never about someone liking her back it was about her and how she felt about herself and accepting herself for who she is”
Mike was completely facing him now too. He blinked. “Oh.” He clearly was considering what Will had said.
“So this friend of yours, and this girl Tammy, you said they were class mates right? But were they friends?
Will shook his head “No no just a girl in her class, a hallway crush I guess you could even say”
Mike leaned against the pew and didn’t say anything, his eyes flickered down. Until he did.
“You still didn’t answer my question” he ventured.
Will knew he couldn’t avoid it a second time. He summoned all his remaining courage and softly said “I know this person isn’t like me because I know this person well...better then I know myself really”
After a beat of silence Mike almost in a whisper, as if they were in a room full of people, replied “But did you ever ask…this person I mean?”
“No”
“Maybe you should…” Mike continuing to quiet his voice.
“it’s a bit late now, odds are we won’t make it out of here” Will said with a huff of nervous laughter, trying to shake this conversation off just wanting it to end, he was looking everywhere but at Mike
Mike wasn’t blinking.
“Will…”
“And he has a girlfriend” Will quickly added.
“Had”
Had.
Had
“Had?
“Had”