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The dimly lit alleyway looks daunting to me tonight. I’ve been through situations like this countless times before. Contracts to take down unsavory individuals that the law can’t reach. I track them and kill them and, in some way, enjoy seeing the creeps take their last breath.
Sadly, tonight is different. This is not a contract and what lies ahead of me terrifies me to my very core. This is new, this is different, this is something I never wanted to happen. I saw the signs but couldn’t stop it. I should’ve acted sooner, I should’ve done more, but I didn’t and that leads me to this moment right here right now and I can only blame myself. The door at the end of it is my destination and I don’t want to reach it – but I know I have to.
As I approach the door I pull my gun. I take a look behind me and lay my hand on the door handle. It isn’t locked. I close my eyes hoping to wake up from a dream, but the door is still there when I open my eyes again. I push it open, hesitantly lift my gun and reluctantly step inside. I feel like I’m breaking apart more with each step.
The building is mostly dark inside, lit by the streetlights that shine in a faint light through the windows. I walk to the stairs slowly, holding my gun up. I’m never this jumpy, I never hesitate, but I clearly had to experience it all in the most harrowing way I can think of. I’m not sure if I can do this.
As I get upstairs, I carefully check both ends of the corridor and see light under one of the doors. I close my eyes again hoping this is all just a dream, but it is an attempt doomed to disappoint me again. I approach the door and stop right in front of it. I hear joyous humming from the other side, the voice unmistakably familiar. I stare at the door for a time that feels like an eternity before I kick the door open and step in with my gun ready – even though I’m not prepared for any of this.
“I thought you’d stand out there in the hallway forever. Almost asked you to come in.” She looks at me with a grin on her face, a malicious glint gleaming in her green eyes. She is covered in blood, which is clearly not hers, even her brown hair is stained with it. There is so much of it that the victim cannot be alive. “Welcome to my sanctum David.” She spreads her arms wide urging me to see her creation. I just don’t want to look but I have to.
I force myself to look around the space opening before me. Carved up bodies hanging on the walls, blood everywhere. A table behind her has another victim on it with a face displaying the unimaginable fear they experienced at the moment of their death. I lower my gun as horror seeps into my mind. I thought I could resolve this peacefully, but she is clearly too far gone. I’m at a loss.
“Sophie, why?” My words sound defeated as despair falls over me. “Why did you do all this?” I feel weak. I feel like I cannot move my body like it weighed a ton.
“You kill people too.” She answers me dismissively, crossing her hands on her chest.
“I kill people who do things like this!” My voice cracks at the last words of the sentence. I struggle to maintain my composure.
“And I kill people who are weak, undeserving of life or just stupid.” She walks around the table looking at the corpse on it with glee. “Besides the feeling when you see them die, the eyes of fear, the last breath, knowing you hold the power to end their existence.” She moans in delight as she thinks about it, making me shudder at the sight of how deranged she truly is. “It’s pure ecstasy.” Her grin sends shivers down my spine. She looks like a predator watching their prey. Toying with them until they are ready to strike. I just seem to be the prey tonight.
“I’m sorry Sophie. I tried to keep you safe.” I try to reason with her against my better judgement. “You… You are like a daughter to me. Please stop this madness. We may still be able to turn things around for you.” I know this won’t work but I must try. I can’t just give up on her that easily.
“I never asked to be like a daughter to you.” She hops on the corpse laying on the table sitting on its sternum. “You just did that on your own. But that just means you won't pull that trigger.” She grins again, her voice impish and mischievous. “Do you know what is more fun than killing a person? Breaking them.” That pure malice on her face breaks my heart.
The gravity of her words hit me like a brick wall. I understand now that she’s been toying with me longer than I could’ve ever realized. I indeed am broken now. Uncharacteristically unsure of myself, hesitant and afraid. None of them qualities I usually display. She has gotten deep into my head.
“You get it now.” She grins devilishly as she hops off the corpse and leans back on the table. “Oh, I love seeing the results of my work so clearly. You were so fun to fuck up. This is just too delicious.” She pulls a knife out sliding a finger on the blade. “Killing a man I have broken myself so badly will be exhilarating!”
She starts to slowly walk towards me. I instinctively lift my gun and pull the trigger without thinking. I hit her in the chest, and she falls down on the floor looking at me in disbelief. She clearly didn’t expect me to be able to shoot her. I stare at her in dread, lowering my gun as she slowly bleeds to death. At the last moment a grin appears on her face, a triumphant glint in her eyes. I feel like she knows she’s won.
I collapse on my knees looking at her dead body still grinning at me. The despair makes my heart sink. I feel the tears start to fall. I never cry. For the first time in my life, I don’t know what to do, how to go on. I look at my gun. How much I’ve used it but never did I expect to shoot someone close to me. I think this will be the last day I’ll ever use it. The barrel looks very inviting to me.