Archive of Our Own

“You broke up with your boyfriend?” Phainon asks, mouth hanging open and a piece of pancake threatens to fall out.

“Yes, now shut your mouth before you make a fool of yourself,” Mydei grumbles, slicing himself off a piece and drenching it in syrup.

“Right before the new year?”

He grunts in affirmation and shoves the food into his mouth. He managed to spend Christmas with his now ex-boyfriend, but he couldn’t stomach the idea of greeting the new year with him. It felt wrong, like he was deceiving the both of them.

“Oh-! Uh-” Phainon swallows his food and jitters in his seat. “I’m sorry?”

“At least pretend to be upset.”

“I’m definitely upset!” Phainon stiffens and forces a nervous smile. “I just didn’t expect it. You two seemed quite happy together.”

He exhales through his nose and shrugs his shoulders. “We weren’t a good match.”

“Ah.” Phainon looks anywhere but at him, and his leg bounces nervously. “So, what is a good match for you? If you don’t mind me asking. You don’t have to answer, of course!”

Mydei takes a quiet sip of his pomegranate juice with goat milk, enjoying the tart flavor.

You.

The words rests on the tip of his tongue, but he holds it close to his chest. While he initially thought Phainon was interested in men when they met in college, the notion was dispelled when he spotted him walking hand in hand with a girl, grin shining brightly.

He remembers how tight his chest constricted. Maybe it was foolish for him to believe they shared a mutual interest, but none of his friends blamed him when he moped about it later over drinks. After all, Phainon fixated on his body too much. Too many suspicious comments which hardly could be explained by a straight man.

Whenever they were at the gym together, Phainon always pestered him to compete in silly contests. From who can sprint the fastest on the treadmill to the dangerous weightlifting and constant breaking of personal records. And when they changed in the locker rooms, Mydei swore Phainon’s eyes lingered on his chest and his back. Friends who joined them always commented about feeling like third wheels.

As it turns out, the ogling ended up being simple appreciation for his carefully maintained physique. One which he prides himself in to this day. Still, the incessant comments, asking him about his regiment— it always appeared as if something brewed beneath the surface.

Maybe he’d believe it more if he didn’t have to swallow the painful lump in his throat when Phainon introduced his girlfriend. It was a short lived relationship, but it cemented his disinterest in men.

And he knew it was a terrible idea, but when the two finished their first year and could move out of the college dorms, they decided to live together. Ever since, they’ve roomed together, even lasting into their lives outside of college.

At least, he can quietly dote on him, making sure he ate healthy, got enough sleep, reprimand him for being a slob, and most importantly dictate his atrocious wardrobe choices.

His silence doesn’t stop Phainon from beaming.

“My wife is back,” Phainon intones, and reaches across the tiny table, pulling Mydei into a tight hug.

“Quit it with that nickname! You know how much it irritates me.” He tries to pry Phainon off him to no avail.

“He was never good enough for you,” he whines, clinging onto him like a desperate koala.

And he hates how even after years of knowing this infuriating man, his heart still flutters at his silly earnest affection. Mydei presses his hand against his head, and their struggle continues.

“What's gotten into you?” He grits his teeth, fighting the blush threatening to over take him.

“I had to watch you spend every day with someone you were way too good for!”

“HKS! Who is good for me, is for me to decide!”

Phainon lets him go, and he breathes a sigh of relief. He's all smiles as he digs through the cabinets. “I had to play nice and keep my hands to myself.”

“I know,” he huffs, and resumes eating his pancakes.

After all, one of the main reasons his relationship ended is because of Phainon. His ex commented on how he always felt like he was in competition for his attention, and how he needed to choose his relationship over his best friend. Going as far as to say Phainon threatened him physically.

Hmph. As if.

Phainon places a bottle of champagne and orange juice on the table. “Let's make mimosas!”

“Isn't it too early to start drinking?”

“Oh come now, Mydeimos! It's a holiday. We're going to be welcoming in the new year, and you need to nurse your wounded heart.” Phainon grins and pours Mydei his share.

“Ugh, fine,” he caves. It's hard saying no to him.

Phainon giggles. “I made sure to pour more juice into yours, just how you like it.”

A faint smile tugs on his lips. “Cheers.”

They clink their cups together. “To a new year!”

Phainon chugs it down all in one gulp while Mydei sips at his. “Don't drink too fast.”

“I'll be fine,” he dismisses, “I have a whole plate of your lovely pancakes to finish.”

The whole plate vanishes in an instant with how quickly Phainon inhales his meal. Mydei raises a brow as he watches Phainon mutter words of dismissal, place the dirty plates in the sink, and rush off to his room.

Weird.

But Phainon tends to be weird at any random time of day. At least he trained him well enough to place his dirty dishes in the sink rather than leaving them on the table.

Once he finishes breakfast, he ties an apron around himself, and rolls up his sleeves. Time to finish the cake he has been working on for the upcoming party. He’s in the middle of adding the crumb coat when a loud crash booms from Phainon’s closed door.

He pads over and knocks. “Everything alright in there?”

“Yeah! Don’t come in! It’s locked anyway so even if you tried you couldn’t!” Phainon’s muffled and panicked voice answers.

Mydei pinches his brow in confusion. What in all the Titan’s is his stupid friend doing? Whatever, not his problem. He returns to his task at hand, completely focused on making the best dessert he can.

After layering the cake, he scoops pink buttercream frosting into a piping bag, and meticulously begins adding a multitude of flowers and petals. All of his years of experience at working in a bakery pays off. The shapes and layout rest perfectly, and he is quite proud of his handiwork. To finish it off, he pins food friendly flowers on top, the gentle blues popping against the pink frosting.

“Can I have a slice?” Phainon approaches from behind.

“You can at the party,” Mydei pulls out his phone and takes a picture, sending it over to Aglaea who is the one hosting the party.

Phainon continues hovering close to him, and the hairs on the back of his neck raise over the lack of distance. Their warmths mingle together, and he forgot how it felt. Phainon kept his distance when he dated his ex, but now he seems eager to make up for lost time.

“Do you need something?” He shoots a sideways glance, and Phainon grins in response.

“Nope! Simply appreciating your handiwork.”

“And how long were you planning on appreciating for?”

“Until you start pouting at me for hovering over your shoulder,” he cheekily answers, and takes a step away, holding his arms out. “What do you think of my outfit for the night?”

Mydei raises his eyebrows in genuine shock over the well put together outfit. A long blue coat, black turtleneck, white pants, and to top it all off he even wears a golden decorative chain – it all fits him too well. There is no way he managed to put this all together on his own.

His throat runs dry. “It suits you perfectly.”

Phainon giggles and grins, having the audacity to do a little spin. “Why thank you! I tried very hard to meet the Mydei seal of approval.”

His grip on his phone tightens.

“Are you planning on meeting someone?” he asks before he can stop himself.

“Me? Nope,” he laughs. “Is wanting to dress up such a crime these days?”

Mydei narrows his eyes suspiciously, and Phainon holds up his hands.

“I’m honest! There is no one I’m planning on meeting up with. I asked Cyrene for advice, and she suggested I should wear something from one of my modeling shoots. So I dug through my closet and found this.”

Of course his nice clothes are the ones he has to dig deep in his closet for. It explains the crash he heard earlier.

Mydei scoffs. “Normally, you decide to wear the most gaudy attire and I have to drag you off that cliff.”

“I didn’t want to disappoint Aglaea,” he says with a nervous smile. He’s definitely hiding something, but he can’t tell what.

“Or… Did you want to yell at me a little first?” His voice dips down an octave, and it flusters Mydei a little.

“Hmph. I’m happy to see you’re making good progress on your fashion sense.” He hides by facing the cake and crossing his arms.

He hears Phainon shuffle over towards the shoe rack. “Then, should I wear these?”

Mydei peeks over his shoulder, and presses his lips tightly together. Phainon holds his well battered shoes he wears to the gym— ugly and destroyed. He knows he’s doing it to get a rise out of him.

“Are you stupid?” He curses underneath his breath, and Phainon lets out a belly laugh as he stomps over.

When he lifts the nice dress shoes from the top shelf and forces them onto Phainon, he spots a dusting of pink on his cheeks, and an incredibly fond look in his eye.

Before they’re allowed into the mansion of what Agalea calls her home, she stands before them with her arms crossed, already scolding them before they’ve committed any crimes.

“Do I make myself clear? There will be no funny business tonight. No silly little competitions, no ruining the event for all the party goers. I will not tolerate a repeat of last time.” Her strict words chide them, and he cringes internally.

He avoids her gaze by focusing on the box of cake in his arms. The last time she speaks of is when Phainon and him destroyed the buffet table in a contest to see who could eat the most. Unfortunately, he lost that one.

“We understand, Aglaea,” Phainon speaks for the two of them. “I won’t goad Mydei this time. You have my word.”

“And yours?” He feels her energy shift to him.

“We will be the pinnacle of discipline,” he agrees.

“Good,” she pinches the bridge of her nose. “Honestly, it’s a shame you broke up with your boyfriend. It was at least a guarantee of no tomfoolery.”

He chuckles softly, “My apologies.”

Phainon’s back straightens, and his smile pinches.

“Tonight, you two will be men, not boys,” she says, mostly to herself, but they still nod. “Alright, come along inside now.”

A servant opens the door for them, and they enter inside. The place is decorated to the brim with evergreen branches, large pinecones for a rustic feel and a myriad of lights in the shape of snowflakes softly glow. In the center, a giant christmas tree proudly stands, golden ornaments cascade down, and the needles are dusted with a white coating. Plenty of people already walk around, busying themselves with acquiring food and chatting amongst themselves.

“You’ve really outdone yourself this time, Aglaea,” Phainon compliments, and she takes it with pride.

The cake is taken from him by a servant towards the back where it will be cut into proper slices to be displayed alongside the rest of the desserts.

Plenty of friendly faces mingle in the crowd, but there are quite a few people he is unfamiliar with. It doesn’t matter to him though, he doesn’t plan on socializing too much. The honor of talking everyone’s ear off always goes to Phainon.

The two make their initial rounds together. There is no point in separating from Phainon since he didn’t have any desire to spend his time with others. No one can match his energy quite like him.

However, they make the mistake of standing underneath a ridiculously decorated doorway, and Castorice’s eyes go wide in shock. Her hands tremble as they lift to cover her mouth.

“Is something wrong?” he asks.

Her shaky hand points to the mistletoe they stand underneath.

“Ah,” he dryly replies. The little thing is easy to miss considering how many other decorations litter the poor doorframe. He swears a flash of light from a camera goes off.

“Well, shall we uphold tradition, Deliverer?” He smirks, ready for Phainon to laugh it off.

What he doesn’t expect is for Phainon’s face to turn a deep shade of red from his neck all the way to the tips of his ears.

“I-I’m not ready!” he stutters, and races off through the crowd, accidentally knocking into Hyacine. Her champagne spills on her pink babydoll dress and she groans in dismay. He loudly apologizes, bowing and takes her by the arm and leads her to the bathroom. Aglaea resists the urge to cover her face with the palm of her hand, not wanting to ruin her elaborate makeup.

Mydei stares in bewilderment, Castorice peeks through her fingers.

Cipher on the other hands, belts out a laugh. “Wow! And here I thought I’ve seen everything.”

“Uh…” he eloquently says.

“But on to the real news. Finally, you broke up!” Cipher roughly pats his back. “Now I won’t have to listen to Deliverer Boy whinge about your love life anymore.”

“What?” He blinks.

“Oh, it was awful. Anytime I wanted to hang out with Princess Homebody and he was around it was like ‘blah blah blah Mydei can do so much better blah blah,” she imitates a yapping gesture with her hand. “Though it was pretty funny. I’ve never seen him so green with envy before.”

That couldn’t be right. Impossible. “I think you must be mistaken.”

“Oh, I wish,” she laughs to herself. “He’s so pathetic sometimes. But he makes it look cute.”

She isn’t wrong about that at least.

“It’s true,” Castorice says. “He was quite opinionated when it came to your relationship.”

“He was nothing but encouraging to me,” he says.

“He’s so two faced!” Cipher blurts.

“He cares for him,” Castorice says to Cipher.

Okay, hold up. These two were jumping to conclusions. “What are you talking about? Deliverer has never once said anything bad about my previous partner.”

“Yeah, okay,” Cipher snorts, and he frowns.

“Are you implying all of his encouragement was false, and he secretly abhorred the man I chose?”

“Yup,” Cipher says with a pop. “So shady, going behind your back and grilling the poor guy about you. I think he even made a questionnaire for him as a test.”

Castorice agrees with a silent nod.

“Why are you telling me this now?” he grumbles. All of this information would have been nice to know earlier.

Castorice speaks before Cipher can continue on with her obnoxious energy. “It didn’t start off as anything serious. After all, it is wrong to jump to conclusions, but… Well… When you started dating someone, and it wasn’t a fling, he lost his mind a little bit.”

Mydei blinks at the revelation. Never in his life could he imagine Phainon fuming over him dating, especially not when he brought so many girls over. He seemed so content in his simple relationships. At the time, Mydei barely paid them any mind and tried squashing his unrequited feelings.

Cipher snickers and pulls Castorice. “Let the Little Prince process all of this. I’m getting peckish and I see some lovely cake over there on the table.”

The two depart, and Mydei is left standing there, dumbfounded.

Phainon harassed his ex behind his back? The thought seems so inconceivable. He needs answers from someone he can trust. Mydei scans the crowd until a familiar face with pink hair in a sparkly dark purple A-line dress stands out. Cyrene busies herself stuffing her face with the cake he brought.

He makes his way straight towards her. “Cyrene.”

“Oh! Hello Mydei,” she greets, and forks another piece into her mouth. She glances around and blinks. “Where’s Phainon?”

“He ran off and knocked champagne on Hyacine. He’s currently helping her out.”

“Ah.”

“Are you enjoying yourself?”

“Yup!” She beams. “The cake you made is so delicious. This is my third slice already.”

“I’m glad you are enjoying it,” he chuckles. Out of all the people he’s glad to meet through Phainon, she is top on the list. “Say, I have a question for you.”

“What’s up? You seem nervous.”

“Did Phainon harass my old partner?” he hesitates in asking his question.

“Ooh, did you finally hear about that?”

“Somewhat, Cipher told me a few things and Castorice backed her up.” He folds his arm, growing more concerned with Cyrene’s familiarity over the subject.

“Yeah, he made a whole questionnaire about you,” she laughs as if it’s some funny joke. “I dunno, he was pretty manic. Basically forced the poor guy into a seat and fill it out.”

“Was there anything else?” he asks dryly.

“Mhm.” She nods all too cheerfully.

Mydei rubs his face, and grumbles underneath his breath before saying. “I’ll make you a whole thing of strawberry shortcake.”

“Oh you’re so sweet!” she coos and nibbles on a small piece of the cake. “He followed him around for a whole day, grumbling about how he’s not good enough for you and he needed proof.”

Mydei blanches. “What?!”

“I was there as his backup. We wore matching hats.” Cyrene fishes her phone out of the secret pocket of her dress, and shows him a selfie she took. The two are posed for the camera, wearing chimera themed hats and goofy giant sunglasses.

“I’m learning a lot today,” he mutters as his eyes narrow.

“I’m surprised it took you so long to realize.”

Mydei makes a face. But before he goes to find someone else to question, sick curiosity fills his mind and he asks, “... How did he do on the questionnaire?”

“Terrible. Failing grade. You did the right thing by breaking up with him. I was there when he took it.” She thumbs through her gallery until she lands on the picture of his ex hunched over a table with Phainon looming menacingly over him, hand placed on his shoulder. At the edge, Cipher’s hand is pointing at the two of them and the rest of her is out of frame.

“Yikes,” he cringes. “I… Thank you for answering my questions.”

She grins and returns to eating her cake, giving him a wave as he departs.

He scans the crowd one more time until he glimpses Aglaea. Phainon works for her, so maybe she has additional information. He starts heading over, but when he spots her talking to Professor Anaxa, he decides against it. The two are already in the middle of a heated argument, and there is no way he’ll be able to tear them apart to ask stupid questions about Phainon’s alleged mania.

Thankfully, it doesn’t take long for his next target to reveal herself with a wet spot on her dress and she fans it with a plastic plate in an attempt to dry it faster: Hyacine.

“Good to see you Mydei,” she greets with a cheerful smile.

“Hey,” he gives her a half smile in return. “I apologize for Phainon’s actions.”

She laughs and continues fanning herself, “It’s quite alright. It was only a little bit of champagne. It will dry in no time and he didn’t mean for it to happen.”

“Naturally.” He nods in agreement.

Before he has the chance to ask her his burning questions, she says, “How are you faring? I heard you ended your relationship.”

Of course Hyacine is the only one who asks about his well being, even though he is the one who ended things. She’s a natural at looking out for others.

“I am alright,” he says after taking a moment to think about it. “Though, I’m finding out more things about it than I originally thought.”

“What do you mean?” She tilts her head.

After a hesitant pause he asks, “Did you know about Phainon’s feelings?”

A cheerful smile spreads across her face and she daintily claps her hands together. “Ah! Did he finally confess his feelings for you? No wonder he appeared so flustered!”

“What?” he deadpans.

“Oh,” she gasps in horror, realizing her mistake. “Oh no. I– Oh look at that over there!”

She points behind him, and he looks over his shoulder. “What? There’s nothing there Hy–”

When he looks back, the plastic plate she held flutters down to the ground, and no trace of the owner remains.

Phainon? Having feelings for him? The idea feels so far from reality it borders on absurdity. The same Phanion who cycled through a new woman once every fortnight? He scoffs to himself, and grabs a fruity drink from the bar.

A few voices erupt in cheers. On the other side, Cyrene, Phainon, and Caelus throw their heads back drinking jello shots. Phainon seems frazzled, and the two beside him serve as his hype men. He tries to go for another shot, but responsible Dan Heng swipes it away. Phainon lays his head down on the bar, moping.

Hyacine's bubbly words replay in his mind, and he bites down the fluttering of his heart. After so many years, it feels wrong to raise his hopes. Plus, he ended his relationship only a few days ago. He can’t be so desperate for Phainon that he’d instantly forgo any rationale.

But when their eyes meet, his hand tightens around his glass. Phainon blinks slowly, a flush rising on his cheeks from the alcohol. Mydei’s jaw clenches, and he beckons with his head for him to follow. Dutifully, Phainon extracts himself from his circle of friends, and follows after him.

He hears Caelus faintly cheering, “You can do it!”

Mydei grumbles underneath his breath. This is ridiculous. Just how many people knew about his feelings?!

He leads them off to an empty balcony overlooking the rolling hills. The lights of the city sparkle in the distance, and the stars twinkle high above them in a cloudless dark sky.

“Hey Mydei!” Phainon beams as he joins him, his warm breathing fogging against the chill of the night.

“Yo,” he says with a nod, and takes a sip of his pomegranate juice. “Didn’t take you for drinking jello shots.”

“Ah.” He rubs the back of his head as he shyly laughs, the blush on his face going strong. “C’mon, it’s the end of the year. I can let loose a little bit.”

“I suppose,” he murmurs. “You’ve been drinking the entire day.”

“I promise I’ll take care of this body in the new year,” he teases, placing a hand on his chest.

“Hmph, is that your resolution?”

“Certainly not, it’s a promise to you.” His grin stretches widely, pinching at his cheeks.

“Promise it for yourself, Deliverer,” he scoffs and takes another sip of his drink, licking the remnants off his lip.

Phainon swallows, and he drums his fingers against the icy railing. “What’s your resolution then?”

He takes a moment to think. “I don’t have one.”

“What? You can’t not have one!”

Behind them, shouts break from the crowds, and they all gather together to welcome in the new year. Two minutes.

“I don’t need one.” He tilts his head towards him, and a half smile finds purchase on his lips. “I already have everything I want.”

Phainon stares at him then asks, “You don’t want for anything?”

“I recognize I have a good life. Good career, friends who are like family to me. What else could I strive towards in the future that I’m not already content with?”

“Well, I mean…” Phainon shifts and rocks on his heels as he grasps the railing. “What about your romantic life? You ended things with your semi-serious relationship.”

“You’re right, I did,” he hums, and places his glass on the railing.

Phainon fidgets beside him, opening and closing his mouth trying to speak to no avail.

“Though, from what I’ve heard, it was only slightly sabotaged," he says dryly.

The words make Phainon freeze in shock, and he breaks into a nervous laugh. “What do you mean?”

“Apperantly, everyone knew of you trying to prove he wasn’t ‘good enough’ for me,” Mydei mimes the airquotes.

“He wasn’t!” Phainon’s sudden outburst startles him, and he clears his throat. “I– I mean he wasn’t.”

“And here I defended you when I broke up with him,” he sighs.

People start counting down. One minute.

“Are you upset?” He hangs his head down in guilt.

“Not really.”

Phainon gnaws on his lip, and he clenches his hands. “Mydei, I want to tell you something.”

“What is it?” Judging from his constant jitters, Mydei already knows. Would the surprise have been nicer if he were ignorant?

“I– Uh…” He’s at a loss for words, especially when Mydei turns to look directly at him. He sucks in a breath and holds it.

Watching him struggle is at least amusing. How many times can he appreciate Phainon squirming over something nonsensical? So much for him being a smooth talker.

“Well?” he pressures with a dark chuckle and Phainon jumps.

People from within start screaming the countdown, and it adds to his panic.

“I know you’ve only just gotten out of a relationship, but I–”

He is interrupted by people shouting at the top of their lungs, “Ten!”

“I…” His breathing intensifies, and Mydei can only imagine what’s going on inside his head. He blinks lazily, finding himself more calm than he’s ever anticipated in the face of the man he’s been yearning for on the cusp of a confession.

Maybe it is because deep down, he understood Phainon held some amount of affection for him. All those times they stood together too close, ignoring everyone else around them, too many moments where he could not explain the odd chemistry between them.

Phainon leans in before the countdown finishes, and their lips brush together. His eyes are screwed shut, scrunching up his face as if he’s about to sneeze. The contact is short lived, and he pulls away almost immediately. His face burns a bright red, and he shyly shrinks into himself.

“Mydei…” he says barely above a whisper, so fragile and tender. “I…”

Voices shout together in unison: “Five!”

“I…”

“Four!”

He gasps, and clutches at his chest, the fabric of his black turtleneck twisting underneath his fingers.

“I…!”

“Three!”

Mydei leans in, pressing their lips together more firmly than before. Phainon’s whole body jolts in surprise, and he gasps. Another loud cacophony of the countdown rings out. Mydei wraps his arms around him, holding him steady.

Phainon trembles in his hold, unsteady, and bears a mess of emotions. Mydei gently leans away a few inches, rubbing at his back in comfort.

The crowd celebrates the new year, cheers ringing out throughout the mansion, music rumbling through loud speakers. Distant fireworks explode in the sky, softly popping in the backdrop.

And Phainon stares at him with wide glassy eyes. “Is-Is this okay?”

“Yeah,” he exhales through his nose, bearing an uncharacteristically big smile.

“Oh…” Phainon’s mouth slacks, unable to tear his gaze away. His trembling fingers touch the line of his jaw, tracing the edge down to his chin. The coldness of his fingers against the warmth of his skin highlighting his gesture.

“It is?” He tenderly repeats the motion.

Mydei closes his eyes, enjoying the feather light touch. “Mhm.”

“Even if we’re both men?”

He snorts, and it breaks some of the tension. Phainon breaks out into a light laugh, and his eyes squeeze shut. Pearls of tears cling to the edge of his eyelashes.

“That was a stupid question, wasn’t it?” He asks, and his lip trembles.

“A little. But I’ll let you get away with it.”

“You let me get away with a lot,” he laughs, exhaling a sharp breath.

“I do.”

“Will… You let me get away with kissing you again?” The question is so soft, he almost misses hearing it.

He opens his eyes, and a smirk spreads across his face. “Why don’t you find out?”

Phainon stops hesitating, and suddenly leans in. Their teeth clank together from the force, and he mutters, “Sorry.”

“It’s okay,” he murmurs against his lips and pulls him in, readjusting their kiss.

And Titan’s does it feel good. His entire spirit lifts and warms holding Phainon like this, sharing in a tender moment together. Even if Phainon trembles the entire time, even if there is lingering hesitation in their kisses. He takes his time, enjoying their newfound closeness, rubbing his thumb on his shoulder to soothe him.

“I feel like I’ve never been kissed before.” Phainon breaks with a shuddering breath, hiding his face in the crook of his neck.

Mydei chuckles, and rubs a comforting hand on his back. “Is it so strange to kiss me?”

“No, not strange.” Those lips press reverently against his neck. “Better than anything I’ve ever experienced.”

Pride swells in his chest, and he adjusts himself to allow Phainon to trail up his neck until their lips meet again.

“Mydei…” he whispers as their lips smack together.

“Hm?”

“Mydei…”

He laughs softly, and Phainon’s grip on him tightens. Mydei brushes his tongue against the bottom of his lip, and he gasps in surprise.

“Too much?” he murmurs.

Phainon makes a noise of disagreement, and eagerly opens his mouth. Their tongues meet together, brushing against one another, and he tastes the lingering rum on him. The first few touches are light, tentative, testing, but as the two find more confidence it turns needy.

The grip on the back of his shirt is tight, and Phainon still trembles, holding on to Mydei for dear life as they kiss. Their chests press together, and their warmths merge into one against the cold. Where he begins and Phainon ends blurs together.

“Mydei,” Phainon breaks them apart when he can’t handle it together anymore, and wraps his arms around his lower back, pressing them closer as he rests his chin on his shoulder.

“Yeah?” Mydei pants, biting his lip when their hips touch together.

“Can we go back home?” he asks with a small whimper, chest expanding and contracting in his heavy breaths.

His heart drums at the innocent question. Home now holds a deeper implication. No longer returning together as simple friends, but something more. Something deeper. He presses a comforting kiss to the side of his head.

And hums in affirmation, for once letting himself indulge in the fluttering of his own heart.

Perhaps he should find it strange to be in the arms of a different man only a couple of days after breaking up with a boyfriend of six months. They stumble into his bedroom, quickly stripping themselves of their tops and discarding them against the floor.

But when that man stares at him with hungry blue eyes he only saw in his fantasies, how can he resist?

Phainon straddles him. His fingers press into the firm muscles of his chest, hypnotizing him. “You’re so firm. Not soft…”

Mydei laughs lightly. “I am a man after all.”

Phainon swallows, and nods.

“You can touch me wherever,” he says, his voice dropping low and Phainon shivers.

“Really?”

“Mm.”

Those strong fingers of his continue to glide over his chest, squeezing his pecs, tracing the red ink of his tattoo, thumb twirling his erect nipple. He groans softly, pressing his head back into the pillow as Phainon explores in fascination. His hips shift on their own, chasing the friction of his jeans, and pressing into the curve of Phainon’s ass.

“Oh,” Phainon gasps, startling like a deer.

“Don’t worry about it,” his hands grip Phainon’s hips, thumbs pressing against the bone.

He shakily nods, and gives his chest one more squeeze before trailing his fingers up, pushing the necklace off to the side.

“I’ve always been envious of your shoulders,” Phainon mutters, and presses his fingers into the muscle.

Mydei exhales, and closes his eyes.

“I don’t understand how you manage to continuously resemble a white marbled statue over the years,” he says, tracing his fingers down to his bicep. “You make anything you wear look good.”

He hears Phainon swallow, and his other hand rubs across his abs. “I always kept looking at you. Wondering what it was about you which captured my attention.”

“I-I didn’t know, I just wanted…” he leans down, and kisses his sternum first then moves on to his chest. “I wanted to simply exist near you. I wanted your attention.”

Mydei sucks in a breath when Phainon shifts his hips— a tentative experimental gesture. Experiencing the sensation of another man.

“And–and I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t feel normal.”

“Phainon,” he says, grabbing his attention before he starts spiraling.

“Yes?” He holds his breath.

He kisses him tenderly, and Phainon melts into it. The tenseness of his body evaporates, and he rocks his hips again, gasping at the sweet pleasure.

“Maybe because it’s you,” he groans as he continues to softly rut. Mydei adjusts Phainon in his grip, placing him in a better spot. “Because it’s you, it’s okay.”

“Mm…” he moans, and focuses solely on pressing his ass against Mydei’s tent. He grips Mydei’s chest again, this time, his nails dig into his skin.

“But there was one night… Where…” His jaw sets tight, and he stops his motions. “I heard you… with your ex through the walls.”

Mydei instantly flushes a deep red in embarrassment. “You what?”

“I can do better!” Phainon blurts out. “I can do way better than him.”

He sits up, reeling from what he said. He places his hands on his shoulders and says, “What?”

Phainon bites his lip, staring down at his collar bone in shame. Mydei sighs, and places a gentle comforting kiss on his forehead, cupping his jaw and rubbing his cheek with a thumb. “Deliverer, if you could hear me, you should’ve told me.”

He shakes his head, and squeezes his eyes shut. “It was just that one time, but I… At the time I didn’t realize why I was so upset. That sort of thing is totally normal to do.”

Mydei kisses his cheek, encouraging him to continue, communicating he holds no judgement.

“And when I talked to Cyrene it all made sense,” he whimpers. “I was jealous. So incredibly jealous.”

“You don’t need to be anymore,” Mydei assures.

“Mm,” he weakly nods and kisses him. “I guess I’m lucky you like pathetic.”

He chuckles warmly, and kisses him again, savoring the softness of his lips. “Phainon, you are anything but.”

“Teach me how to be with you,” Phainon says, his eyes sparkling with too much earnestness. “I want you to never think of anyone else again.”

Mydei chuckles and shakes his head. “You are ridiculous.”

“I am for you,” he smiles fondly.

“You’ll need to take these off then,” he tugs at the button of his pants. “Are you sure you’re ready for that?”

He nods, and climbs off his lap. The two slip off their pants, and Phainon begins getting flustered over their underwear.

Mydei unceremoniously tugs down Phainon’s, and he gasps in shock, covering his face and peeking through his eyes.

Now, Mydei has seen Phainon naked in the past when they changed in locker rooms. Quick glimpses, never lingering. But beholding him in this intimate moment, his cock standing erect in the privacy of his room, it stirs a deep hunger.

“Lay down on your back,” Mydei presses his palm against Phainon’s chest, and pushes him down.

Phainon follows through with the gesture, covering his face with a hand, unable to look at him.

“Good boy,” he says, all low and sultry, smirking as he knows of Phainon’s love for affirmations.

Like clockwork, he gasps at the platitude, and his hips wriggle.

He continues, “I doubt there are many differences in this aspect.”

Phainon holds his breath, knowing exactly what Mydei alludes to. His breath hitches when Mydei presses the length of his tongue against his tip, slowly brushing against it.

“Are you sure about this?” he squeaks out, eyes wide but pupils dilated.

Mydei has never been more sure of something in his life. The amount of times he’s wanted to do this to Phainon are far too many to count. And he knows Phainon will sing in pleasure. His heart skips a beat over what’s to come.

He places a kiss and says, “I’ve never been more sure of anything.”

Phainon inhales sharply then groans when Mydei slides his cock into his throat. He has to hold his hips to prevent him from bucking up. Slowly, he dips his head all the way down to his base, savoring the sensation of Phainon so deep within his mouth.

“You really are a beast,” he pants with a small chuckle, threading his fingers through Mydei’s hair. “I should’ve figured you’d lack a gag reflex.”

He rolls his eyes, and shoots a small glare upwards, enjoying how flushed Phainon is. The second they make eye contact, Phainon stiffens and shyly looks away. He lifts his head, and bobs back down, not once letting up on watching Phainon’s reaction.

His skin is flushed, the red creeping down to his shoulders now. The fingers in his hair grip tighter as he presses his head back against the pillow, soft moans spilling from his lips. Whenever he dares to peek down he struggles to meet his gaze.

“St-Stop watching me,” he manages through his panting. Mydei scratches down his sides in response, and continues his ministrations, loving the sight of Phainon becoming more undone with each lustful suck of his cock.

“Mydei…” Phainon starts chanting his name, and his own desire aches painfully against their confines.

The way he rolls his name off his tongue like it’s the sweetest candy he’s ever tasted, makes him burn hot. Makes him want to ram himself inside without any preparation, and take him properly. Fuck, he’s never craved for anyone else this strongly in his life and he’s losing his mind.

“Mydei-! Wait I-!” Phainon interrupts himself with a delicious moan, and he continues his relentless pursuit. Chasing the building hot desire, wanting it to spill inside his throat and lick it off his lips.

Maybe, Phainon is right. He must be a beast if he’s this consumed to wring out his seed. Or maybe it is the years worth of longing spilling over into one single moment. Phainon’s heel digs into his back, and his hips buck upwards.

“Mydei!!” he groans, and warmth spills, hitting his throat. He shifts upwards, using his hand to continue stroking as he makes sure to lick up every single drop, letting none go to waste. Normally, he has no eagerness to be so thorough, but this is Phainon.

The man who infuriates him so much, yet provokes such devotions it makes his heart quiver. He rests his head on his hip, panting and catching his breath. The fingers in his hair idly massage his scalp, and he closes his eyes, a smile creeping up along his face.

Out of all the places in the world, this is where he wants to be the most.

“Mydeimos…” Phainon whispers, rolling his name along his tongue.

“Hm?” His throat is a bit hoarse.

“You’re crazy,” he says with a small laugh, and he finds himself chuckling as well.

Mydei shifts, planting kisses on his stomach, trailing upwards as he crawls on top of him, ending with his lips. They stay there, kissing one another tenderly until Phainon shifts his leg and feels Mydei’s heat against his thigh.

“Oh,” he gasps softly.

“What?” He uses the break to kiss at his neck.

Fingers slide through the band of his briefs, scratching at the skin. “Do you want to…?”

The leg against his crotch shifts and presses up more against him. Mydei stops, and leans back in order to properly look at him. “If you’re ready.”

Phainon appears insulted. “Of course I am! It can’t be that difficult.”

Mydei smirks. “Then take them off me.”

Without needing any more nudging, Phainon stubbornly takes them off in one go, and makes eye contact with his cock.

“Oh.”

“Having second thoughts already?” he teases.

“No!” he says, fighting through his fluster. “It grew and it’s… huge.”

Mydei blinks, then laughs. “That is what tends to happen when the man I love is naked underneath me.”

Phainon stills, and his face sears over the casual and sudden declaration. He tosses the last remaining article of clothing so hard it flies across the room and thwaps against the wall.

Mydei grabs the lube from his nightstand, squeezing a good amount on his fingers, and rubs it. “Have you done anything like this before?”

“No,” Phainon pants as he catches his breath, head still spinning from his previous sentiment. “But I read some posts online and watched porn.”

“Hm, it’ll feel a bit strange at first. Just try to relax.” He gets in between his legs again, and traces the rim of his hole, ignoring his choices for research.

Phainon gasps at the sensation, and instantly clenches. His fingers continue to rub the entrance, and he slowly eases himself. “You know, it does feel pretty strange for you to be finger my asshole like this.”

“Maybe you should not talk for this,” Mydei deadpans.

He bites his lip and nods, heart racing from the awkwardness. “Yeah, yeah, okay. I’ll be quiet.”

Phainon takes in a deep breath, steadying himself. Mydei waits for his breathing to mellow out, all the while kissing his forehead, cheeks, and nose. He captures his lips, distracting him with his tongue when he slips a finger inside.

“Just like that, you’re doing good,” Mydei encourages him.

Phainon gasps and wriggles at the sensation, but focuses his attention on the tongue brushing against his. His hole clenches around the single finger, and Mydei’s cock pulses in desire, wanting to spread Phainon apart and press himself inside, but he needs to reign himself in. Not until Phainon is ready.

With patience, he waits for Phainon to relax, and presses a second finger inside. This time, Phainon panics less, more accustomed to the sensation of fingers pressing inside him.

“Good boy,” he whispers in his ear, kissing and biting at it, and Phainon’s entire body shudders. His cock already standing fully erect again.

“Mydei,” he groans, and desperate hands clutch his shoulders.

He laughs softly, and his fingers thrust in and out at a gentle speed, helping him grow accustomed to the sensation, before he searches deeper, crooking his fingers until Phainon’s breath hitches and his eyes blow wide.

The surprised moan rips loudly from his throat. It reverberates against the walls of his room, and his nails dig into his shoulder. Mydei grits his teeth at the welcomed pain, forcing himself to stay in control.

But it’s so difficult when those soft needy moans keep slipping unabashed out of Phainon. How many times has he touched himself to the fantasy playing out in front of him. Phainon, underneath him, eyes screwed shut in pleasure. His heart pounds erratically against his chest.

He slips another finger inside, entranced by Phainon’s squirming.

“Ah-!” Phainon throws his head back, and his legs unconsciously spread themselves apart, as if welcoming Mydei to take his rightful place.

He takes the opportunity to bite and suck at the delicate expanse of his pale throat, forcing himself steady by directing his urges there. Fingers thread through his hair, pulling at the roots, and a low rumbling groan rumbles from him.

Phainon lets out an airy laugh, “Like… Getting your hair pulled huh?”

“I like everything you’re doing.” He bites his chest.

He gasps. “You can’t-! Say that so casually.”

“And why not?” He pulls his fingers out, and positions himself between Phainon.

“Because…!” Shyness finds him again when his cock presses against his entrance.

Mydei chuckles, “Don’t look away from me. I want to see you.”

He bashfully smiles at him, and it pulls at Mydei’s heart strings. He looks so helpless underneath him like this, nothing like the boisterous confident man he presents himself as to the others. The one beneath him is the real him, delicate and sincere. Unsure of every step he takes, but eager to prove himself. The side of Phainon only he has the privilege of seeing.

“You’re staring,” Phainon murmurs.

“So are you.” He smiles fondly in return, and cups his cheek. “Are you ready?”

“Are you?” he teases, and slings a leg across his waist, nuzzling into his hand. “I’m quite flexible, you know.”

“I help you stretch.” He leans down, kissing the spot underneath his ear. “I know exactly how far I can push you.”

“Then what are you waiting for?” he tempts, pressing down against the head of his cock.

Mydei bites his lip. “Savoring the moment.”

“Funny, for a second there I thought you were scared,” he taunts, finding his confidence again.

“Scared. Really,” Mydei almost rolls his eyes, “You are the one who should be scared of what I’m going to do to you.”

“And yet, I’m anything but scared.” He bites Mydei’s cheek.

Phainon really knows how to get under his skin, even in the intimate moment of their first time. Without any more hesitation, he presses himself inside fully. He planned to take his time, and ease himself in, but Phainon doesn’t deserve kindness anymore.

“Okay, okay, I’m scared.” He gasps as his hole stretches out. “Fuck, that’s a lot bigger than the fingers.”

“Hah, you should’ve known better than to mess with me,” Mydei gloats, running his hand underneath Phainon’s thigh and lifting it up until his knee touches his shoulder. “And I do plan on using all of your flexibility to its fullest.”

Phainon gulps, but his pupils dilate with desire.

He shifts his hips, pulling himself out by a few inches, and rocks himself back inside, helping Phainon get used to the sensation. Phainon lifts his other leg, wrapping it around his hip, all too eager to experience getting fucked. Mydei holds his hip with his other hand, keeping him steady as he stretches him out more with his cock.

“Mydei,” Phainon’s eyes flutter shut as he breathes out his name. “This is not a dream… is it?”

He bites on his neck, and sucks on it, leaving a red splotch to bloom, and thrusts deep inside, the smack of skin against skin echoes.

Phainon whimpers in delight. “What an answer. I’m truly at your mercy.”

Fuck, those word travel down all the way to his swollen cock. His restraint is constantly pressed and challenged, and it's a battle he’s losing. Phainon scratches down his back, leaving white lines down his broad shoulders.

His hips rock in and out earnestly, his thrusts getting deeper and deeper with every passing moment. He angles himself just right, pressing himself against Phainon’s spot of pleasure, and he watches in bliss as his eyes roll back, and he clutches on to him even tighter.

Every scratch which digging deeper into his back, every unadulterated moan, every bite into his shoulder, makes him lose it second by second. He wants to fuck deeper, faster, and he positions himself so. Phainon never tells him to stop or to slow down.

Instead, he figures it out. He notices how every time he hurts Mydei a little more, he gets more reckless. And when most would ease off, he indulges him. He bites harder, scratches until he trails red lines, anything to please him.

Phainon squeezes around him, and Mydei presses as deep as he can, spearing him with every thrust until his rhythm grows frantic. He grips his hips tight, hard enough to leave bruises, but allowing himself to continue pounding into him at his manic pace.

Heat pools into his groin, and he chases the singular pleasure. For once he can set himself free from worries, he knows Phainon can handle it. In fact, Phainon continues to encourage him to drown himself in the pleasure of his body.

He plants a messy kiss, biting at his lips and being bit in return. A feral grin stretches across his face, and Phainon coyly smirks in return, eyes darkened with desire. Only they can see one another like this, so lost in the heat of passion.

He trembles as he spills inside Phainon, filling him up to the brim. Stars appear in his vision and the only thing he can focus on is the tightness around his cock. And Phainon continues squeezing around him, milking everything out of him, taking every drop he can give.

Mydei ruts through his climax, a groan rumbling in his throat as he pants. When he spots Phainon rubbing himself, he shoos his hand and takes over, finding the strength to pump him and push him over the edge as well.

The two lay in the sticky mess, panting and catching their breaths. Phainon tries to speak, but his throat can’t crack out a single word, too destroyed from his incessant moaning. He can see it in the look he gives him, the question of how well he did, the yearning for praise.

Mydei tenderly kisses everywhere on his face, leaving his bruised lips for last, and Phainon radiates pure simple joy from the affection. Such a sight makes Mydei fluster, and Phainon playfully hits his shoulder, laughing hoarsely.

“I’ll clean us up,” he murmurs. “And get you water.”

Phainon grins, and collapses onto the mattress, boneless and thoroughly fucked.

Out of all the things he should have anticipated, it is how needy and shameless Phainon can be. They’ve been together for a month, and he constantly says annoying things.

“Where’s my good luck kiss?” he asks, eyes closed during breakfast.

“What do you need luck for?” Mydei dryly responds.

“For my busy day at work of course. Aglaea plans on working me to the bone, and I’m not going to be back until midnight, and I know you’re going to be asleep by then,” he explains, scooting himself forward in search of his lips.

“I didn’t realize you could become more annoying,” he says, and shoves a spoonful of eggs into his mouth instead.

Phainon frowns and whines, but swallows the food. “C’mon, we’re dating now! Boyfriends! It’s totally normal.”

He shines when he says the word ‘boyfriends’ and Mydei can’t help but sigh. “We just had sex.”

“Good luck sex. I’m missing the good luck kiss to seal the deal,” he says. “It won’t work until I get a kiss.”

Mydei furrows his brow in confusion over the asinine logic. At least Phainon is cute when he begs. He knows how to use it to his advantage too well.

“Fine,” he grumbles, and pulls Phainon in by the collar, leaving him with a sloppy and rough kiss.

“You’re the epitome of romance, has anyone ever told you that?” Phainon pouts.

“You do all the time,” he counters.

Phainon continues on pouting and sulking. Now, Mydei isn't about to admit he gives in to the wobbling of his lip. He places a more tender kiss because he knows how much he's going to whine to all their mutual friends. And not because his heart melts when Phainon coos at him and rubs their noses together afterwards. Kremnoans don't have the word for “romance” in their language.

But Strife be damned, he has a one month anniversary surprise prepared for the evening. Aglaea approved it with a stern look on her face after much prodding. He's pined over this stupid idiot for years, he can indulge on his whims!