Chapter Text
Michael Wheeler was gay. Sure- he might’ve realized it earlier than he realized it, but it finally sank in when he sat down and tried to form a single thought about his friend- no, his best friend William Byers. I mean, you couldn’t blame him? Or well, you could, he ignored Will, pushed him to the side, pretended nothing was wrong and Will still liked him? It was bizarre to his very simple mind, but he couldn’t help the greed that overcame him when he realized. He, Mike Wheeler, supposedly not over his ex girlfriend, which.. he wasn’t but he was definitely over her in a romantic way? I mean.. he didn’t even think he liked her in that way. He loved her for sure, but never romantically. But that was besides the point, he, Mike Wheeler, age 19, wanted Will Byers all to himself. It was selfish; it was so very greedy, but he longed to feel Will, his lips on his, his hand tangled in Mike's hair-
“Mike! Jesus Christ I’ve been calling you for an hour basically!” Jane yelled, Yeah, his other best friend’s name was Jane. It was practically a punch to the gut, but he learnt that it was nice to have her around. She was funny, smart, and didn’t romantically like Mike, it was a match made in heaven, I mean they were like two peas in a pod- Dustin once said “like Robin and Steve”…Mike did not find it applauding.
“Shit sorry Jane” he mumbled, rolling out of bed and brushing through his curls with his fingers, too tired and too upset to really say anything else, Jane walks over and puts a hand on his back. It’s almost like anytime he was upset she could sense it from a mile away.
“You don’t have to pretend you're okay enough to go out today, I can call everyone and tell them you gave us the Flu..” she said with a slight smirk, Mike rolled his eyes and laid back on his bed.
“Like they’d believe we got the flu in the middle of August” he scowled, no bite behind it but still annoyed about how he had to fuck everyone’s plans up yet again. To be fair they didn’t think he cared about fucking up plans, everyone was used to it. But the long rants he had with Jane about hurting everyone and still being the mirror image of his asshole father stung.
Jane smiled at him with this look of sympathy- or.. he didn’t really know. All he knew is the next thing he was crying into her shoulder, the Michael Wheeler, the one that was so tough and brave sobbing into someone’s shoulder? It was pathetic. Honestly, he was just sick of himself. Being around someone insufferable is hard enough, especially if that insufferable person is those 24/7 thoughts that go on in Mike Wheeler's head.
“I truly am just a self-pitying idiot,” Mike mumbled once he calmed down, wiping his face and sniffing up what was left of his snot.
“Ew you're disgusting…” she said, smiling and wiping a tear from his face, and giving him a tissue from her pocket. She pat his back and leaned against him.
“Dude, do you just carry tissues?” He said as he took it from her and blew his nose. His thoughts calming down for once in his life in Jane’s presence. She was one of the people who could truly calm him down since he started college- coming in second with Will of course. He smiled at her and hugged her again.
“Don’t you have a date with Christie today?” Mike asked, somehow remembering something for once. He looked at her like a guilty puppy and pulled away from the hug.
“You and practically everyone we know my girlfriend thinks of you as our son. She’d be angrier if I didn’t skip our date.” Jane reassured him, making Mike grin and nod at her. Although Mike couldn’t help but feel guilty, somehow he didn’t doubt that was the truth about her.
Jane paused before asking the expected.
“….sooo are we gonna talk about why you were so distraught finally?” Jane questioned, making Mike sigh and put his hand on his forehead. Sure Mike wanted to expose his every secret to his college friends, how he still has nightmares, how he wakes up thinking that Will would go missing again, how he wanted to kiss his best friend of so many years-
“I mean.. I mean.. yeah we can but it’s just, you know why. You’ve always known why.” He mumbled, glancing over at Wills’ empty side of the dorm, too quick for Mike to think she noticed, too slow for her to not notice.
“You know, Will doesn’t know yet. Maybe if you told him it could change things between you guys, probably for the good?” Jane questioned, almost doubting those words.
“As if.” Mike rolled his eyes. God, he wanted to crawl into a hole and die right there and then. Why couldn’t he get his stupid best friend out of his head? I mean he knew why. But he didn’t wanna admit it out loud that he was… I mean .. the G word. It made his stomach twirl at the thought of saying out loud he was gay. He continued to zone out until Will came in with a couple of shopping bags- probably from a date with his stupid boyfriend.
“‘Mike? He questioned, Jane and Mike both straightening up, and stared at Will entering.
“Shit hi Will-!” He said trying to hide the post cry in his voice. Obviously not working as Jane gets up and waves as Will goes to sit next to him. He looks majorly concerned for Mike. Which makes Mike feel pathetic cause it is in a way Will's fault, which seems crazy to say but it’s not entirely false.
“Mike, wanna talk about it?” Will asks with that soft voice that he always had, god it made him wanna cry more, fuck Mike Wheeler's obsession with Will Byers’ stupid soft voice. He almost says yes until he sees the necklace around Will's neck. Right. Will wasn’t his anymore, he wasn’t even sure if Will even wanted to go crazy together anymore. I mean probably not. Will had to have moved on. He was with Carlton, god his name was so stupid. Anytime he saw Carlton he just wanted to punch that grin right off his face.. Why did Mike have to love Will right now out of all times? Why was he stupid? Why was he so late? Why-
“Mike?” Will asked again. Shit. Mike got lost in his own world.
“Sorry yeah, I’m just… deep in thought. I’m sorry I don’t think I can uh.. talk about it.” He mumbled the last part, looking at Will with his big puffy eyes. Will probably felt sorry for him, probably thought Mike was a stupid person who was using him. God Mike. You're so selfish.
“It’s okay, do you need anything? I got some snacks so we didn’t have to go down for dinner today.” He said with a smile. Why would Will smile at him? Mike. The selfish bastard who took so much happiness away from him. He felt so stupid. So so so stupid. Will didn’t deserve someone like Mike. So why was Mike so mad that he got what he actually wanted? Mike knew deep down that Will had gotten over him ages ago, I mean why else would he have a perfect boyfriend?
“Maybe a water, that would be nice” Mike replied, smiling back at Will on command.
“Okay, maybe we can visit my mom and Hopper this weekend? We could do a movie marathon. Just the two of us?” Will said, rubbing Mike's shoulder, Mike looked at him and before he could have the harsh reality of the thoughts that came across him, he nodded and agreed.
“Yeah. Let’s do that.” Mike said, his Will voice coming out on command, his smile brightening at Will being so kind to him. He truly didn’t deserve to live with this boy, much less be his best friend. But he couldn’t help but yearn for more.
“Okay well, I’m going to get ready for bed, wake me up if you need anything, Mike,” Will said as he ruffled Mike's hair and went to the bathroom, Mike sat there in a trance before lying down and turning off the light. He was happy that Will and He shared a dorm, almost elated that it wasn’t Will's boyfriend, but before he could concern himself more he fell into a deep sleep.