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“I believe”
Quiet, understanding sobs are shared between the party, knowing this is the end. Knowing all their near death experiences and childhood trauma has led them to this moment, sitting in the comforting silence of Mike Wheelers basement. It’s quite ironic really. Six years ago, they sat here in the exact same seats, exact same characters, exact same game. Except they have changed, hell they’re basically completely different people now. That’s what travelling through alternate dimensions and almost dying on various different occasions does to you I guess.
All that’s left now is hope for the future. A future free of interdimentional beings and alternate universes. The five teenagers sit in a shared, new sense of relief, longing for what the future has in store for them. The Wheeler boy, as the outstanding storyteller he is, has just shared what he believes all of his friends will achieve. Max and Lucas will go off to college together, far away from the trauma of Hawkins. The boy will continue to further his skills in basketball, finally getting over his fear have having to choose between popularity and friendship. The girl, after missing two years of education due to being in a coma, and a further two suffering from the grief of her dead step brother, strives to catch up on the years she missed, throwing herself in to her education. Dustin goes to a college in Indianas neighbouring state, Illinois, not wanting to move too far from his home and mother. He craves to expand his knowledge, studying various science derivatives in order to better understand the world around him. Will moves to a New York to start a new life, where he explores his passion for art, and discovers who he is as an individual without his past to define him.
Mike, however, is unsure. Unsure of his purpose, or where life is supposed to take him. He’s been so distracted by the constant action he has been confined within, that now he has the freedom to chose his path, he feels lost. Confused. Through fighting vecna and the mindflare, he doesn’t know who he is anymore. And don’t forget El’s death. It affected him more than he would like to admit. Since watching her disappear with the upside down 18 months ago, he hasn't been able to stop thinking about her, what else he could have done, if he could have saved her. If, just maybe, he should have been the one to die.
And he hates himself for it. El had, has, so many people that love her: Hopper, Joyce, Will, Jonathan, her actually family. But you don’t see them hiding themselves away and wallowing in their sorrow for months on end. But Mike, every single day since she passed, has continued to push everyone away, resulting in himself losing the people he loves the most, as well as himself.
He suddenly has an idea.
“Uh guys,” he starts, and everyone looks up at him, still teary eyed and emotional. He makes eye contact with the boy opposite him, Will, who looks back at him with a sympathetic concern in his eyes. Will is the only one who never stopped visiting Mike over the last year when his mental health began to decline. Not the say that the others didn’t care, but they all got caught up in their own studies, as well as catching up on pivotal teenage experiences after the final battle. He understands. He never wanted to bring them down with him.They had moved on, something Mike still hadn’t figured out how to do yet. Will, however, never gave up. Even when Mike refused to talk to the boy, he would visit the Wheelers house everyday, bringing a differing variety of homemade and deeply personal gifts in an attempt to cheer him up. Although he never showed it, Mike really did appreciate Will’s thoughtfulness. He kept every painting, every letter that Will gave him, often even crying into his pillow after looking at them. He loved Will. He really did. And he hated himself for not showing it. He needed to make it up to him. Maybe that’s what he could use tonight for.
“Did you still wanna go to that party? It’s only 9:30.” The party lit up, smiles and nods filling the dark, heavy room.
“Hell yeah!” Lucas beamed, already out of his seat and pulling Max up with him. Max rolls her eyes at him, attempting the hide the smile forcing itself onto her lips. The five of them had never been to a proper party, having grown up as ‘the weird kids’, never popular enough to be invited. Dustin, however had managed to pull off the greatest valedictorian speech in history, scoring them invites to Stacy’s, aka the richest girl in our years, house party. And that meant, Mike thought, alcohol was sure to be everywhere. He could drink away his sorrows, while giving himself one last night to enjoy his teenage years with his best friends. And hopefully talk to Will.
There are already floods of people moving in and out of the door as we arrive, groups gathering and couples making out, in a way that is way more than acceptable for a public setting, in the front yard. Swirls of smoke fill the air, combining from various different groups, and red plastic cups are scattered randomly across the grass. The whole property is huge, almost double the size of Mike’s house. If it’s this busy outside, how crowded will it be inside, Mike thinks. He shares a glance with Will, who has an unreadable expression on his face. Neither of them particularly enjoy being in crowded spaces, but Will hates them even more than Mike; when they were children they would rather spend the day with just the two of them in Mike’s basement than go out. Mike thinks it roots from his trauma from his dad, when he would lock him in their small bathroom as a punishment. Ever since he met Will, he would straight out refuse to even go in the school changing rooms if they got too busy, resulting in them changing in a spare classroom on various occasions.
Mike grabs Wills hand, giving him a reassuring squeeze, as if to say ‘we don’t have to do this if you don’t want’, but the boy shakes his head and stands up straight, confident. Will looks incredible right now, Mike notices. Since everything with the upside down disappeared, he’s gained this sort of confidence. He’s discovered his style, currently wearing these black straight leg jeans that are ripped at the knee, and a white fitted t-shirt layered over a blue polo. His hair is looser, framing his face perfectly as it falls naturally just above his eyes. He’s really grown into his looks in the past few months. Mike is happy for him. Although he’d never admit it, Mike thinks he looks beautiful.
Max, Lucas and Dustin are long gone by the time the two boys enter the grande front entrance. Similarly to outside, people are standing in groups, swaying in beat to the sound of the echoing music. Mike can’t see a single speaker, confused on where the music could be blasting from. He looks around looking for anyone he recognises, but no one catches his eye. He does, however, spot the kitchen, the large island hurried with various different cocktails, bottled drinks and mysterious brightly coloured mixtures.
“Drink?” Mike mouths at Will, knowing there’s no chance he’d be heard over the thumping music taking over everyone’s thoughts. Will nods, not looking totally there, and lets Mike drag him by the hand towards the kitchen.
Mike needed some alcohol in his system, still terrified of how to speak to Will. It’s stupid really. They’d been best friends most of their life, yet Mike couldn’t even build up the courage, while sober at least, to thank Will for being there for him. However, he knew it was more than just that. He just didn’t understand it yet.
Mike grabbed 2 plastic cups and filled them with the mysterious, brightly coloured mixture sitting in a large bowl on the counter, handing one to Will. The taste was indescribable, having no particular flavour. It was overly sweet, even too much for Mike’s sweet tooth, but had a bitter after taste, presumably from whatever combination of spirits had been mixed in. Mike scrunched his face up as if he had just eaten something sour, causing Will to let out a full body laugh. He takes this opportunity to really admire Will; his long, dark lashes, slight blush spread artistically across his face, the way his hair has grown to fall just above his eyebrows.
“Fuck” Mike mutters under his breath, internally slapping himself. Why does he keep thinking these things about Will. He shouldn’t be thinking like this about his best friend. About a boy. In an attempt to rid the thoughts rushing around in his brain, he picks back up his cup and downs the rest of the disgusting blue liquid, his mouth burning along with the rest of his body as it washes sharply down his throat. He needs this to work quick, make all these new, confusing feelings slightly more bearable, rather than sending him into paralysis any time Will looks at him. Those stupid puppy eyes might actually be the death of him. But as he catches Wills eyes, full of some unrecognisable emotion, but so very Will, Mike can’t help but smile. Heat flushes around his body, and up to his face, filled with a sense of honour knowing that he gets to know this body. He gets to see that ridiculously perfect smile that Will gives every time he sees Mike. The smile that is reserved for him, and him only.
“Wanna go outside?” Will says, snapping Mike out of his own self-sabotaging thoughts. He’s staring at him with an almost teasing smirk, as if he knows what he is doing to Mike by literally just standing there. But fuck he looks incredible. Will probably hasn’t noticed. Mike says nothing, his eyes grazing between Wills eyes, every so often dropping momentarily down to his lips, before forcing them quickly back up. Going against his brain, he catches Will slightly lick his lips, probably not even intentionally, but that’s it for Mike. He is done for. He stares shamelessly as Will’s previously dry lips become wet and full.
Will definitely noticed.
“It’s kinda loud in here.” Will continues, pretending not to notice the inner crisis going on in Mike’s head. He might be imagining thing, what with his newly found apparent obsession with Will’s mouth, but he is sure he sees a gentle pink spread just below Wills eyes, even through the strobing lights of the party. But again, he wouldn’t say he is entirely sane right now, so who knows.
Eventually, he nods, his face definitely flaring up in embarrassment, and follows the boy outside.
The two boys find a seat outside in a relatively quiet corner of the garden, sitting in a comfortable silence while they can finally relax without the thumping of music constant in their heads. The other three are still nowhere to be seen, probably of dancing and laughing, having the times of their lives. They always were more into this sort of scene than him and Will, and he’s fine with that. He’d rather spend alone time with Will anyway. Ever since they were children it had been that way, always finding each other in a crowded room and running off to be alone, together. Always together. Before they met the rest of the party, it used to be just Mike and Will. They basically became one, completely inseparable. Always finishing each others sentences, holding hands when one got scared, sleeping over each others houses when their families got too much. Mike misses that, when Will saw him and him only. Not to be controlling or to say Will can’t have other friends, of course he can, but a part of him just wanted to have Will all to himself and not share. They have drifted apart slightly over the past few years, what with everything in the upside down, and, undeniably, Mike getting a girlfriend probably didn’t help. He never meant to push Will away. It just sort of happened. But Mike would do anything to take back everything that happened between them. He wants to apologise to Will, hug him tight and never let him go again. He wants to run his fingers through his soft, perfect hair and hold his beautiful face and ki-
Woah. He stops himself. What the fuck is going on, why is he thinking these things about his best friend? The alcohol must be hitting him finally, Mike thinks, trying to reason with himself.
Screw it, he needs to talk to Will eventually, and with liquid courage running through his veins, now is probably the best time to do it. The only time he’ll be brave enough to open up about his stupid feelings, even to Will who understands him better than anyone.
“Will,” the boy starts, grabbing the others attention and locking eyes. As he speaks, his heart beat quickens, his breathing becoming broken and irregular, and his eyes go blurry as tears begin to form around his eyelids. His body is shaking uncontrollably, totally out of control of his own body, as if he is watching this moment going on from a distance with no way of stopping it. He started speaking, “I needed to talk to you, and uh- I’ve been I guess, scared, and it’s stupid cause like you’re my best friend and you understand me better than anyone, but I-“
Will cuts him off, noticing the panic rising in his voice as he rambled together a string of incoherent nonsense.
“Mike. Breathe.” Will grabs the boys hands in his, rubbing gentle circles on them with his thumb. He thinks back to the day at the Mac-Z when he was coming out. He was deep in a panic attack, trying to get out any sane reasoning that would make his confession any less scary. This reminded him of that, and all he wanted in that moment was for someone to comfort him, to grab his hand and tell him everything was going to be okay.
Mikes heart warms at Wills touch, just like it used to when they were kids. Mike used to experience panic attacks a lot as a kid, but Will would always know exactly how to calm him down and make him feel safe. His breathing starts to slow down, legs coming to a soft hault as Will brings Mikes hands up to his chest so he can copy his breathing. His heart beat is slow, comforting, recognisable. He remembers when he used to fall asleep on Wills chest at sleepovers, mimicking his breathing as he slowly drifted off to sleep, and a small smile tugs at the corners of his mouth. This. This is what Mike misses. It’s so- so them. Everything feels back to normal for a moment. Just him and Will together in their own little world, no monsters or creatures to distract them.
Mike locks eyes with Will again. He really doesn’t understand how Will has so much patience for him, especially in moments like this where he’s being a complete and utter wreck. But starts speaking again, “I just wanted to say thank you, Will”
“What for?” Will questions, clearly not what he was expecting to hear.
“Just everything. For being there for me, for never giving up on me even when I was pushing you away,” Mike takes a deep breath, unsure whether to just put it all out there and say what he wants. He decides to just say it, not worrying about the consequences, “For giving me a reason to live.”
Mike says this last bit in a whisper, like if he spoke it too loud it would hurt more. He looks down, shy, refusing to make eye contact with Will. He almost regrets saying it. What if he makes it awkward, pushing Will into an uncomfortable conversation about his suicidal feelings. If that’s what you can even call them. It’s not like he’s planning to kill himself. He just sometimes doesn’t see the point in being here anymore, like wondering if he even deserves to be here right now. His life has gone downhill fast in the past 18 months, leading him to debate his life on various occasions.
After a long few minutes, Mike finally looks up at Will, almost ashamed, tears still gathering on his eyelids. But that quickly washes away when Will pulls him into a tight hug, pulling Mikes head into his shoulder and running his fingers gently through his curls. He melts into the boys warm embrace, allowing his tears to run freely down his face and onto Wills neck, finally freeing every emotion he’s locked away in the past year. Will holds him tighter, whispering comforting affirmations into his ear as he cries, letting him completely fall apart in his arms.
The two boys finally break apart, faces wet and red, yet full of emotion and understanding. They look at each other, Mike letting out a quiet, breathy laugh at noticing how much of a mess they both look right now. They are still at a crowded party, he remembers, but honestly doesn’t care. He just wants to focus on Will right now.
“You are the bravest, smartest, strongest, most thoughtful person I have ever met.” Will starts, nothing but genuine honesty in his voice, “Mike, you don’t understand how much you mean to me, I don’t know what I would do without you. You’ve been here with me through everything. We’ve been face to face with death together. I forced you into a life changing situation when I first got taken, but you never gave up on me. Not once. Please Mike, don’t give up now. I can’t lose you. I love you so much.”
The world feels like it stops. I love you. The words run through Mike’s head on repeat. Those three words seem to flip something in Mike, years of confusion and self hatred suddenly snap out of him, now highlighting everything as clear as ever.
Without taking even a second to think it through, he reaches his hand up to rest it on Will’s tear stained cheek, rubbing his thumb gently against the smooth skin on his cheek and jawline. He takes a second to truly admire the boy in front of him, every shade of pink and red blending together perfectly below his eyes. Those perfect hazel eyes, bright and glowing as the moonlight hits them from every angle. He almost doesn’t look real, as if he’s some rare, hidden artwork created to show the definition perfection.
Then he leans in, closing the gap between them. He presses his lips gently against Wills, and every worry, every fear he’s ever felt melts away. How has he lived his whole life without this, without the electrifying feeling of Will’s soft lips against his. The kiss is gentle, light, their lips barely even moving against each other, instead whispering sweet nothings and promises for the future into each others hearts. Yet it feels so right. As if they’ve been doing this for years. It only lasts short of 30 seconds, but to Mike, it feels like an eternity. This could be the last thing he ever feels and he would be happy.
When they break apart, much to Mike’s despair, everything feels right again. No words are shared, yet a complete understanding is shared between the two. They sit there in a familiar silence, savouring the moment of their first kiss. Mike Wheeler kissed Will Byers. And Will Byers kissed back. It doesn’t feel real, like something that would only ever be a distant fantasy. Yet here they are, cheeks flushed and lips wet, surrounded by their blossoming love for each other.
“Wanna dance?” Mike smiles, full and genuine for the first time in over a year.
Will just smiles, no need for words. Mike understands, grabbing the boys hand as he stands up. They stay outside, swaying slowly from side to side, Mike’s hands resting gently on Wills hips, while Wills wrapped loosely around his neck. They stood there in the moonlight, which was lightly shining a spotlight onto the two boys, just taking in each others closeness. The moon of the night where everything begun. The music played quietly in the background, ‘Heroes by David Bowie’ just recognisable beyond the silence of the yard. Everything was perfect.
This. This was Mikes reason to live.