Chapter Text
Anakin is having the dream again. Every night, they repeat, but each morning they're quickly forgotten. Tonight, an orange and glowing orb—glowglobe, his mind supplies—follows him as he rouses from a plush-looking bed. He dresses in black garbs and walks through the halls of a familiar yet foreign castle. The halls are dark save for the glowglobe and it casts eerie shadows onto the stone. His footfalls are near silent as he enters a room with a long table. A voice calls out to him, but the sound is warped and twisted in ways that reverberate through his bones and he does not hear the words.
The scene shatters and shifts and he is laying down again. He can feel the warmth of sand beneath his body and fingers caressing his spine. He looks turns his head to look back at his lover. He cannot see his face clearly but he feels his soul humming in tune with his own. He speaks his lover's name almost reverently—
"Anakin!"
Anakin is sucked out of the dreamspace as quickly as he fell into it and he feels its memory bleed out of his mind like Spice through his fingers.
He blinks down at his bed in confusion but he hears his master call his name again, the tone growing in frustration. He sits up slowly, wincing at the throbbing pain in his temples. He slowly meets Obi-Wan's concerned gaze.
"Are you alright, Anakin? It was difficult to rouse you today," his master asks. Anakin opens his mouth to recount the dreams, but his tongue cannot form thoughts that do not exist anymore.
"I'm fine," he says instead. "Won't happen again." The words are practised and regurgitated without any meaning and he knows that Obi-Wan can feel it, but mercifully his master does not press him.
"Get dressed. There is much that needs done," he orders before giving Anakin his privacy. He remains on his bed for a moment longer, sifting through his memories and trying to grasp onto anything that remains from the dream. It's important, that much Anakin knows, but he cannot make out anything more than incomprehensible flashes.
Finally, he rises and slips on his robes. His gaze lingers on the brown for a moment longer than it should. He has brief flashes of himself wearing all black. Not robes but something form-fitted and pressed. He shakes the thought out of his head and gathers his things quickly before he angers his master further. He finds Obi-Wan waiting just outside his room and he gestures for Anakin to follow him.
Obi-Wan walks a quick pace through the halls, forcing Anakin to take longer strides to catch up. He's discussing some sort of unrest brewing in the Empire, rivalling factions maybe, but Anakin's mind is far away. He glances at his hands, almost feeling some sort of phantom warmth he assumes is left over from his dreams. He doesn't realise that Obi-Wan has stopped walking until he almost walks right into him.
"Anakin," his master sounds almost exasperated. Looking around briefly, Anakin notices that they'd walked a great distance with him firmly lost in his own thoughts. "Where is your mind today? This is important."
"Sorry, master," Anakin mumbles. "What were you saying?"
Obi-Wan sighs and looks around them. "What's going on, Anakin? Is everything alright?"
Anakin's brows furrow slightly. A thousand complaints rest on the tip of his tongue, but he can't force any of them out. Instead he just replies, "Nothing, master. I just haven't been sleeping well." It's not a lie, and he knows that Obi-Wan will be able to feel that, but he can also see that his master senses that there is something more to it. If Anakin was able, he would have no qualms about reciting all of his worries, but they're so hard to articulate that he doesn't find the idea of trying to be even the least bit palatable.
Obi-Wan stares at him for a moment longer before clearing his throat. "I need you to focus, Anakin."
"Yes, master," Anakin replies automatically. Obi-Wan seems satisfied with his response and turns to walk away.
"As I was saying," he continues as soon as Anakin catches up, "there seems to be some level of unrest stirring amongst some of the great Houses. We're to oversee the meeting at the rotunda and await our next assignment."
"You know I dislike politics, master," Anakin mutters as they approach senate building.
"Regardless of your opinions, Anakin, politics are the one thing keeping the universe in balance," Obi-Wan replies sagely.
"It seems, to me, to be the thing keeping us divided." Obi-Wan gives him a droll stare, his hands resting on the main door.
"Come, Anakin, and mind your tone once inside."
"Yes, master." With that, Obi-Wan throws open the door. The building is abuzz with hundreds of overlapping voices in dozens of languages and Anakin can feel the tension reverberating through the Force. He looks around and tries to catch fragments of the conversations, but he only latches onto a handful of words.
Obi-Wan pays the masses no mind and weaves his way through the crowd. Anakin follows closely behind him until they make it to the main chamber. A quick glance around confirms that most of the senators are already seated. They make their way to their seats alongside other members of the Order.
A hush falls over the chamber as the emperor walks out. Anakin quickly tunes out whatever speech he'd prepared as he takes note of who all is at attendance. He sees several flags for the Houses Major but notes that a few of them appear to be missing. His eyes search for one in particular, but he can't seem to remember what the sigil looks like or why he's looking for it in the first place.
Before he knows it, the meeting is adjourned and Anakin stands with his master despite not having heard a single word of the proceedings. He sees Obi-Wan give him a sideways glance and he knows that he is caught, but mercifully Obi-Wan doesn't press the issue.
"We'll discuss this later," Obi-Wan tells him before walking off. Anakin holds back a grimace and follows him. A large part of him prays that Obi-Wan will simply forget. It's been a strenuous day so far and the lack of sleep is slowly catching up on him. They make their way through some of the winding halls until they reach a large room, far away from the crowds.
"Master, I—" Anakin begins, ready to apologise before Obi-Wan begins his lecture
"They're sending you out on a mission tomorrow," Obi-Wan cuts in before he can complete his apology.
"Alone, master?" Part of Anakin is thrilled to finally be trusted to be on his own, but there's a measure of trepidation in his soul at the thought.
"Yes, you're to head to Kaitain tomorrow to aid members of the Sardaukar in their protection of the emperor," Obi-Wan explains. Anakin fights off a grimace.
"No one is bold enough to attack the capital, especially with the Sardaukar there."
Obi-Wan narrows his gaze at him ever so slightly. "If you had paid any attention at all, you would know the reason for the precaution," he scolds. Anakin grits his teeth at the tone. "You should gather your things and your strength. It is a job of high import, Anakin."
"Yes, master." Anakin bows his head and Obi-Wan claps a heavy hand on his shoulder before leaving him alone. Kaitain is practically on the other side of the galaxy. Surely, the Sardaukar are good enough protection, so why send him?
When Anakin falls asleep that night, he feels almost pulled back into that dreamspace. He's back on that alien planet, in those same dark halls. He can hear a heavy torrent outside and his feet and chest are bare as he stalks through the halls. Not even the glowglobe follows him at this hour. He feels voices reverberating through the stone as if the words carry a great amount of power. The walls tremble until cracks form and loose rubble fall and cascade down like sand.
The image warps as it so often does and suddenly he's kneeling. The stone flooring is different, ancient somehow and he no longer hears the rain. Instead, he sees the water directly in front of him. It's some sort of pool, but much bigger than Anakin has ever seen before. He leans over the edge to peer at his reflection in the still water.
Instead of his own face, he sees someone else, with sharp features and glowing blue eyes peering behind a curtain of dark, curly hair. His mouth opens and as he begins to speak, the water ripples. "Anakin," he speaks with a thousand voices and each one sends shivers through the Force. "Remember."
Anakin jolts out of bed with a panicked gasp. His head throbs as his mind is consumed by an avalanche of forgotten dreams. His feet carry him to his master's chambers before he can fully catch his breath.
"Obi-Wan!" he shouts, all but forgetting his manners as he barges his way in. His master leaps out of bed, ready for an imaginary attack but his face grows confused as he sees Anakin instead.
"Anakin, what-?"
"Master, I—" Anakin's breath catches as he winces at a thunderous pain lacerating its way through his cerebral folds. "Something isn't right. I don't know what's happening." Panic seizes control of his lungs and it isn't until he feels his master's hands on his arms that he realises that he is hyperventilating.
"Anakin, breathe," Obi-Wan urges gently. Anakin struggles to calm to torrent in his brain, but the dreams keep coming in waves, not unlike the oceans licking the side of the castle—
"My mind is flooded with thoughts that should not be mine. They belong to someone else, I know this and yet I know them as intimately as I know my own truths," Anakin gasps out, his mind's eye reeling through hundreds of images. "And when I lay my head down at night, I see him there. Except I am him, and I see through his eyes as if they are mine. I walk through a castle on an alien planet who's name I should not know and yet the universe whispers it to me. I stand at the side of a great and powerful man—my father—and am trained daily by my mother. I wield a power so terrible it violates reality and shakes me to my core. And yet, I am not him and none of that is my own life. Why is it then, master, that I witness his life every night when I am supposed to be dreaming of my own?"
Obi-Wan is silent for so long, Anakin wonders for a moment if he'd said any of this aloud. Finally, his master replies, "These are just dreams. Nothing more."
For some reason, this guts him. "Then why does my soul tremble at the very thought of him? What kind of falsehood tricks my very being?"
"You should not dwell on these dream, Anakin. Focus on preparing for your mission instead." Anakin hears the dismissal clearly and bows his head respectfully before slowly making his way back to his own room. He grips his own hands to cease their trembling and the nearby lights pierce into his skull. His eyes shut with a wince and he sees him, as if the image of his face has been burned into the insides of his eyelids.
Despite his master's words, Anakin finds himself ruminating on the dreams as he returns to his chambers. He finds the idea of them to be mere dreams improbable, but he has not other explanation for them. They're so unlike the dreams he had about his mother. He's not even sure if they are visions or just something new entirely. He remains lost in thought as he dresses for the day. It's still early. He doesn't need to be fully awake for another few hours, but he does not have any desire to try and sleep more. He knows now exactly what awaits him when he does.
Anakin double checks his belongings before walking out. He feels no strong attachment to this room, but he's also not sure how long his mission will last on Kaitain. It's odd thinking about leaving the place that he's called home for most his life now. He wanders through the halls, the overhead lights no longer searing his retinas, thankfully. He could take his speeder to his ship, but he knows that the walk through the city will help clear his mind.
It's a long walk to the shipbay, Coruscant being the big city it is, but it gives Anakin plenty of time. He needs to make sure he has his head on straight, especially around the Sardaukar. They hail from the prison planet and their brutality is known across the galaxy. They're not the people to show any sort of weakness to.
By the time he arrives at his ship, it's mid-day. Obi-Wan is already waiting for him, overseeing the crew loading supplies for the journey. He notices Anakin's approach and lets out a relieved sigh as the tension in his shoulders bleeds out. He finishes his orders to the nearby men before giving Anakin his attention.
"You here, good," he breathes and Anakin furrows his brows slightly.
"Of course I'm here, master. Why wouldn't I be?" Anakin questions.
Obi-Wan looks hesitant for a moment and glances around them. "I'm sorry for earlier, Anakin. I spoke too harshly," he apologises. "Dreams are a dangerous thing and can lead down a dark path." Anakin knows what Obi-Wan is referring to, but he doesn't know how his dreams could lead him towards the dark side. For once, he holds his tongue.
"Am I just about ready?" he inquires instead.
Obi-Wan hums and looks back at the crew. "Yes, they're just doing some final checks and making sure you have plenty of supplies. You should be ready to depart shortly," he states. They watch the workers for a moment longer before one of them rushes over to inform him that they're ship is ready to leave.
Anakin triple checks his own belongings before turning towards Obi-Wan. He hesitates for a moment before giving him a small smile. "Farewell, master. Until we see each other again."
"Hopefully soon, Anakin," Obi-wan says. "May the Force be with you."
Anakin bows his head. "And you, master." Obi-Wan steps back to make room for Anakin to walk past. As he boards his ship, he glances back to his master to see a slightly troubled look fall on his face. Anakin wants so desperately to run out of the ship and question what troubles him, but he forces himself to continue.
When he makes his way to the cockpit, he sees that the coordinates to Kaitain were already punched in. He clicks on autopilot and takes a deep breath as the engine hums to life. He spares a glance towards Obi-Wan one last time. Anakin doesn't see him immediately and it takes him a moment to locate his swiftly retreating form.
Before he can deduce where his master is heading to in such a hurry, his ship takes off. He watches the city grow smaller and more distant before sitting back. Due to the distance, even traversing through hyperspace will take some time. Anakin tries to recall what systems are in that area. It's a part of the galaxy that he hasn't been to before.
One planet's name echoes in his head but he shakes it out.
After making sure the course is steady, Anakin takes a deep breath and closes his eyes. He has a feeling that he won't have many opportunities to hone his skills on Kaitain. Despite what Obi-Wan says, he highly doubts that anyone would come near the capital, let alone attack it. He may as well focus on his meditation since he won't be seeing any real action for the foreseeable future.
It takes several breaths for his thoughts to cease their racing. Suddenly, he's hyper-aware of the minute vibrations of his seat and the previously unheard tinnitus in his ears. His brows furrow slightly as he tries to focus on something, anything, other than the near-silent humming of the machinery around him. He tries to imagine the Force, the way his master had taught him as a child.
As the image in his head grows, he feels a pulling. A warmth floods him as he thinks about his master on the other side of the bond. He reaches through the Force, desperate for something to help ground him. The emotions bleed through the bond, and they feel so different that it nearly rips him out of his meditation. He feels something akin to frustration and petulance and Anakin finds himself delving deeper without thinking, trying to deduce the origin for these feelings.
Suddenly, he falls downwards, forwards, towards. And then he's sitting at a table. It's the same long table he's seen many times during his dreams. He picks at his food on the plate in front of him. It's food that he doesn't quite recognise, but there's a certain feeling of déjà vu that tells him that he's seen it before. He look up to see his mother sitting adjacent to him.
Or…not Anakin's mother.
She pours two glasses and grabs one to sip from it. She nods down to the second. "Command me to give it to you. Use the Voice," she urges. Anakin trembles at the mention of that power but the body he's invading simply lets out a frustrated sigh.
"Now? I've only just woke up," he grumbles but his mother pays him no mind. He sees that his mother is not going to hand him his water until he complies so he lets out another sigh and all but glares at the glass. "Give me the water," he tries, adding some amount of grit into his voice. Anakin feels no shuttering of the Force and sees immediately his mother's disappointment and annoyance.
"The glass cannot hear you commanding me," his mother scolded. He feels the frustration and anger flood him and settle in his gut. His eyes flick up to stare into his mother's, the greens peering at him curiously.
She doesn't believe we can do it, Anakin thinks before his thoughts stutter in confusion at his phrasing.
Time slows before he can think further and he feels the Force quake and tremble. Somewhere, he hears a wind chime move, the melody sounding distorted and warped. When he opens his mouth to speak, he hears a dozen more join in. Anakin's own voice joins in the mix.
"Give me the water."
Anakin shudders so violently it nearly throws his consciousness out of this familiar stranger's body. He sees it so clearly, his mother reaching forward and sliding the glass towards him, but when reality settles, he finds her hands unmoved. Her lips move as she finally pushes the glass towards him, but Anakin doesn't hear her words. Instead he feels himself fly out the body and he makes eye contact with his green eyes.
"Anakin," he mouths, voice silent and suddenly the world shatters and melts before his eyes. He hears his own laughter, the sound so jarring after the uneasy scene that he nearly doesn't recognise it. He feels sand under his fingernails, but for once he doesn't despise it's feeling. He stares up at the night sky, admiring the two moons. He notices then, the warmth on top of him and he looks down slightly to see him. Instead of green eyes, he sees blue. The colour seems to glow as it invades his sclera. He feels his lips mutter his name with all of the reverence he could possibly muster.
"Anakin," he replies with a smile. His forehead falls forward to press against Anakin's. Anakin's eyes cross as he stares at his lips and they both move to meet in the middle. As soon at their lips touch, he feels the Force fracture. Behind his closed eyelids, he sees a red giant, too small in mass, explode into a brilliant supernova. He sees neutron stars that were perfectly orbiting suddenly shift until they slam into one another. He sees dozens of celestial bodies of varying masses collapse and continue collapsing until all that remains is an impossibly black spot in space and time.
The Force cries out in agony as reality is violated, but Anakin is lost in soft lips and warm skin under his sand-crusted fingertips. The kiss ends with a slick sound and he looks up at his lover zealously.
"Anakin," he feels against his lips more than he hears with his ears. The sand around them vibrates as the next words are spoken. "Come to me."
Anakin sucks in a large breath and finds himself back in his starship, only now he's clutching onto the steering. It takes him a few more micro-seconds to realise that the autopilot has been switched off. He gasps for breath as he tries to take inventory of where he is. He sees the heat surrounding his ship as he is nearly nosediving into a planet. Anakin's muscle memory kicks in as he flips a couple switches and tries to regain control of his vessel.
He realises quickly, that he's already lost a wing, presumably burned up in the rough entry. He tries to deduce where he's crashing but only notes the vast amount of water. He sees a number of mountainous regions and tries to quickly calculate if it would be better to land in water or land. His head spins as he speeds up the closer the ship gets to the ground. Shortly before hitting the ground, he sees a familiar castle on a hill overlooking the ocean and immediately knows where he is.
Caladan.
Anakin passes out seconds after he pulls up on the steering to try and divert from a direct nosedive into the ground.