Work Text:
"A pride parade!?"
"March," Nie Huaisang corrected. "A pride march."
"Okay, but, one — it's June, not March," Wei Wuxian noted in that tone that indicated he was absolutely fucking with him, and Nie Huaisang simply rolled his eyes good-naturedly. "And two — what's even the difference anyway?"
"Oh Wei-xiong, am I glad you asked," Nie Huaisang responded with a twinkle in his eyes. "We call it a pride march, because it is not just a parade, but a protest! We're there to remind the bigots and fascists that we're still here, strong and united in all our freaky glory — not just to party and have fun."
"No fun?" Wei Wuxian said with probably the best approximation of the pleading-puppy-eyes emoji a real human being could make with their face.
"Not just fun," Nie Huaisang clarified. "But there'll be fun, Xianxian, no need to worry." Though he suspected that was hardly something Wei Wuxian ever had to worry about. He was the kind of person that would manage to turn an intervention into a party and a funeral into also a party and one time he'd managed to turn the grumpy, hungry queue in front of the school's canteen into a conga line with nothing but his phone's music connected to the school's Bluetooth speaker system ("If they set their password to admin321 it's their own fault they get hacked," he'd said) and good attitude. So, really, Nie Huaisang was convinced the boy was able to turn anything into a party if he so desired.
"Awwww yayyyy!" Wei Wuxian cheered overly playful, draping himself over Nie Huaisang who casually pushed him off, lest he mess up his meticulous make-up. "And you're sure it's fine for me to come?"
"Why, of course! Why would it not be?" Nie Huaisang asked, not even looking at his clingy barnacle of a friend. He was having an overly affectionate day, he noticed, though he didn't mind much. Wei Wuxian's moods were fun to go along with, albeit a little exhausting at times.
"Weeeeeell, you knoooow," he drawled, as if Nie Huaisang hadn't just made it clear that he very much did not know. "You know I'm all in for that kinda shit, the El-Gee-Bee-Tee and stuff. Love is love, gender is a construct, money isn't real, and time is an illusion — but I'm just a poor little straight guy, after all! Are you sure it'll be okay?"
A straight guy. Of course. Naturally. Absolutely.
"It'll be fine," Nie Huaisang decided to wave off his concerns, rather than addressing the fact that he wouldn't believe him for a second that Wei Wuxian was just a poor little straight guy. Granted, he had no proof otherwise — at least if you believed Wei Wuxian that his incessant gushing about Lan Wangji was entirely as platonic as he claimed — Wei Wuxian had always enjoyed flirting with pretty girls. But there was just something (other than his huge crush on the second Lan brother) about him that made his gaydar go crazy. But— it wasn't his place to make that call. Besides, it truly shouldn't be an issue whether Wei Wuxian was straight, cis, both, or neither. "You are an ally and as such are welcome to join. Just don't make it about yourself and your… straightness."
"Aye aye, capt'n!" Wei Wuxian responded with a mock salute that had Nie Huaisang rolling his eyes.
Wei Wuxian had never been at a pride march, or any pride event for that matter— why would he? He was straight after all, and while he'd always been an enemy of gender roles, he didn't think of himself as anything but a guy. Sure, he couldn't care less if dudes wore pants or skirts or whatever, but that didn't make him a gal, right? He was pretty sure that idea defeated the whole point of something something gender roles are bad something something.
But he'd always admired them, when he saw videos of pride events and drag stuff and what not. Truthfully, when Nie Huaisang had first told him about his and his brother's tradition to go to the local pride march, he had been practically vibrating with the hopes that his friend would invite him. Sure, he didn't want to crash a party meant to celebrate queer — was he allowed to think-say that? — LGBT people and their experiences, and he really truly supported them! He never really understood why anyone wouldn't, who cares who other people choose to date or what pronouns they wanted to use? But he wasn't going to make it about himself! He would be the most well behaved not-center-of-attention attendant he could be. He just really wanted to be part of the festivities at least once in his life! It had always looked like so much fun!
But! Not being the center of attention didn't mean not being able to dress to impress — or at least Nie Huaisang had insisted so. And who was Wei Wuxian to disagree? Nie Huaisang was both his host and the one with experience in this matter, after all! The fact that agreeing meant he'd get to wear the probably most fun outfit Wei Wuxian had ever laid his eyes upon was merely a small bonus in his endeavor to honor his gay best friends wishes to dress him up.
Nie Huaisang was already dressed by the time Wei Wuxian had showed up at his place, an elegant dress hugging his almost feminine figure, a neckline so low you could nearly see all of his chest, revealing a charming layer of glitter that likely was going to get all over the house, driving Nie Mingjue insane over the next few weeks. He wore a cape over his back, the material thin and somewhat see-through, as well as a long feathery boa around his neck. All of it was, naturally, dyed in all the colors of the rainbow — with the exception of his intricate make-up which, while certainly still eye-catching, at least limited itself to mostly shades of green and yellow.
It slowly dawned on Wei Wuxian why his friend had asked him to show up at the ass crack of dawn (9:30 in the morning) when he had been forced to sit still for what had to have been hours by now (around 10 minutes) for Nie Huaisang to do his make-up. Some time during the process his friend had resulted in straddling Wei Wuxian's lap, the latter's legs trapped between the former's in an attempt to keep him from wiggling in his seat too much and incidentally messing up Nie Huaisang's intricate work on his face. It was just so frustrating having to sit still for so long! Not to mention having to sit still while someone smudged around and tickled all over your face doing god knows what, having to fight the temptation to tilt his head and look at the mirror that was right in front of him, so cruelly blocked by the back of his most dearest and currently most evilest friend's head.
The torture he's endured for a good time. The sacrifices he's made. He could shed a tear at the thought, if it wouldn't be messing Nie Huaisang's work up.
"Don't be silly," Nie Huaisang interrupted Wei Wuxian's self-pitying apparently-not-so-inner monologue, his eyes focused on his friend's eyebrows and his face closer to him than it likely had ever been before. "It's all waterproof. Who do you think I am? Cry away, pretty boy, but do make sure not to pull too much of a face while I'm still working on you."
"But Sangsang, how am I supposed to ugly-cry if I can't contort my face into shapes you've never even imagined before?" Wei Wuxian blinked pathetically at him.
"I allowed you to cry." Nie Huaisang forced Wei Wuxian's eyes shut as he applied something to his lids. "Not to get ugly. No ugly allowed while you're wearing Sangsang's work, you hear me? You can pretty-cry, like one of those forlorn anime boys. That's much more your style, anyway."
The end of his suffering was announced by Nie Huaisang's excited squeal as he finally finished the last touched of Wei Wuxian's extravagant make-up.
"Alright now, have a look!" His friend finally allowed and Wei Wuxian nearly let out a moan in relief when he was finally released and allowed to move again. Nie Huaisang moved aside, allowing Wei Wuxian access to the mirror.
He had already been dressed before the make-up, though while Wei Wuxian had naturally seen the clothes handed to him, he had yet to actually see himself wearing them. It was much less as flashy as Nie Huaisang's own outfit, but much more his style. In fact, Wei Wuxian wasn't entirely convinced that Nie Huaisang had truly simply decided to lend him some of his clothes — he almost suspected his friend had actually gone out and bought those specifically for him. He couldn't remember the last time Nie Huaisang wore latex…
His chest was barely covered, a latex strap covering just the necessities, connected by a chain to a latex choker around his neck, both dyed in blended rainbow colors, a dark, see-through mesh fabric connected that formed both the sleeves around his arms, as well as a loose hood around his head. He wore a high skirt of a similar rainbow latex material, held up by a studded belt, a split on one side revealing more of his already mostly revealed leg wrapped up in the fishnet stockings he was wearing, which disappeared into his own black leather boots he'd brought for the occasion.
Wei Wuxian nearly bit his lip in excitement as he let his eyes roam over his own reflection. His face looked impeccable as well, lips painted in a rich black, sharp winged eyeliner the way he'd like to do for himself every now and then when he'd feel fancy, but his eyelids were beautifully painted in rainbow colors as well. He put back on his piercings and accessories Nie Huaisang had made him take off before starting to mess with his face — a piercing on his nose, his lower lip, three studs on one ear, two on the other — and absolutely delighted in the image.
The sound of camera snapping finally snapped (hah!) Wei Wuxian's attention back into this world and out of the mirror world, glancing towards Nie Huaisang who had likely been taking pictures of him for quite a bit now.
"Wei-xiong, I mean this with my whole heart, you look hot as fuck."
"Sangsang!" Wei Wuxian burst out laughing. "Sangsang, are you coming on to me!?"
"Well," Nie Huaisang drawled playfully, taking a slow step closer as one finger was twirling around a strand of his hair, "If you're offering…"
"No! Huaisang, down!" Wei Wuxian complained, stepping away from his friend's advances, yet still laughing wholeheartedly. "I'm not offering anything!"
"Aw," Nie Huaisang sighed overly dramatically. "A shame, truly. You better be careful, Xianxian, the boys will be all over you."
There was likely a legitimate warning in those words, as playful as they were, but Wei Wuxian could hardly take it as such. Instead he just felt… excited? He had no interest in taking home any gay men any time soon, or any women either honestly. Bedding someone he hardly knew sounded more awkward than fun, if he was being honest. But he'd always enjoyed a little flirting, some brief touching, the knowledge that he was desirable and the game of making a cute girl — or maybe soon some cute guys? — laugh at his shameless quips already bringing him as much joy as he could want.
And besides, if anyone really were to get a little too close to him for his comfort, Wei Wuxian was confident he could handle himself!
"Huaisang!" A gruff voice called from downstairs. "Are you about done!?" He sounded annoyed — how long had they been letting Nie Mingjue wait?
Nie Huaisang seemed to be catching onto his brother's annoyance as well, quickly grabbing his last few additions to his outfit — a purse and a flashy fan — before grabbing onto Wei Wuxian's hand.
"Alright, Wei-xiong, it's go time!" He spoke as he began dragging him out of his room and down the stairs. "Pride march crash course: Don't engage with bigots, don't start a fight with them — the blame will fall on us even if they provoked it. Don't drink anything you didn't see poured yourself — that's a bar rule, but you never know — and for the love of god, don't let any strangers weasel you into drugs."
"Nie-xiong, how stupid do you think I am!?" Wei Wuxian complained, but there was no fire behind it. He honestly appreciated his friend's concern and advice, even if taking drugs from a stranger was very obviously something incredibly stupid to do! And Wei Wuxian was not going to acknowledge how he'd likely not even considered just how stupid it was if it hadn't been pointed out to him. Nope! He was smarter than that! No one could prove otherwise.
"Oh!" A small voice rang out once the two had reached the bottom of the stairs and Wei Wuxian could mirror that sentiment the second he looked up, coming face-to-face with Lan Zhan's older brother Lan Xichen out of everyone, clinging close to his boyfriend.
He knew Nie Huaisang's brother was gay, as much was clear by the fact that he was dating a man, and he knew that he'd be coming to the pride march with them, but… somehow he hadn't exactly expected to see him — to see them — dressed up like this.
Wei Wuxian had thought that Nie Huaisang dressed him up quite revealingly. That thought was thrown out the window the second he saw Nie Mingjue and Lan Xichen. Aside from his shoes the former wearing practically nothing but some leather belt-like harness covering, well… nothing of worth, really. His whole chest was right out there nipples and all, impressive muscles rippling even under his thicker build. Only his crotch was truly covered — and thank god for that — but even the underwear only seemed to cover as much as was truly necessary.
Lan Xichen wasn't being much more prudish, though his own harness set at least covered his breast and he was wearing what had to be the shortest skirt Wei Wuxian had ever seen, as well as leather boots even taller than his own. Around his neck was— Wei Wuxian couldn't even pretend to call it a choker, not when there was a d-ring attached to what clearly was some kind of collar, a leash in Nie Mingjue's free hand and… was Lan Xichen holding some kind of dog mask!?
"Damn, Sangsang, is this allowed?" Wei Wuxian whispered into his friend's ear, and though he had meant it playfully, he was awfully bad at whispering and Nie Mingjue was awfully bad at catching his brand of humor sometimes.
"You got some kind of problem?" He grunted, his eyes already narrowing on Wei Wuxian, who was quickly flustering at his own blunder. Here he had sworn to be respectful, only to fuck it up with the first non-Huaisang gay person he saw!
"No, no, I'm just— surprised is all!" It was the truth! Honestly! They could go out butt naked if they so pleased, he just genuinely hadn't expect to be seeing so much of them!
Nie Mingjue gave him another grunt, unimpressed, but not pissed at least. "Get used to it," he said. "Unlike Princess Rainbow Sparkles over here—" He nodded his head towards Nie Huaisang, whom rolled his eyes. "—some of us are dress to make a point. The bigots always love to proclaim their support for us — up until they have to acknowledge that we fuck. Then it's back into hiding with us." And then there was a rare smile on Nie Mingjue's face, a grin that could almost be described as smug. "Someone's gotta put them in their place. They either accept all of us, or none of it."
"We are going on a protest, after all," Lan Xichen chimed in, his voice much gentler and softer, though there was a bit of an edge to it. Was he shy? "We can't be too compliant!"
A protest? Right, Nie Huaisang had said the same thing, hadn't he? Wei Wuxian supposed his friend must've picked that mindset up from his family.
"Alright, makes sense," Wei Wuxian nodded agreeably. And yet, he really couldn't stop himself. "So… when you guys are in bed—"
"Da-ge, I think it's time to leave!" Lan Xichen suddenly chirped, a little louder than necessary. "We don't want to miss the start of the march, after all!"
Wei Ying was going to this years local pride march.
The news had reached Lan Wangji via his annoyingly meddling older brother — though for once he may just be a little grateful towards him. While Lan Wangji had been quite aware and content of his sexual and romantic preferences — which were no one, really, but if it had to be anyone their gender would hardly be of relevance — ever since he was old enough to understand such topic, he had never been the type to go to a pride march, or pride bar, or any such events and places that celebrated these types of things. Though he understood the concept and necessity from a historical and societal standpoint, it simply wasn't his style to celebrate a part of himself that was, quite frankly, as natural to him as being right-handed. Plus he wasn't too fond of crowded spaces and loud music.
But. Wei Ying would be there. That alone changed so many factors. For one, his attendance carried implications that neither Lan Wangji nor Lan Xichen had dared to say out loud, yet they both knew.
Wei Ying was queer.
Lan Wangji had had feelings for the boy ever since they had met in middle school. Though he had fought both with Wei Ying and with his own heart to make it not so, it was undeniable he was smitten — as his brother would phrase it. For the longest part Lan Wangji had been content keeping those feelings locked away under the pretense that Wei Ying would not be interested regardless. He was, after all, a very straight man, flirting with every cute girl he came across, while knocking boys into the shoulder with his fist. The contrast couldn't be clearer.
And yet he was going to a pride march.
Truthfully, it could mean anything. Perhaps Wei Ying had discovered to be of a different gender. Perhaps he preferred relationships of a more polyamorous nature.
Or, perhaps, Wei Ying had discovered a taste for men.
The thought sent a shiver down his neck. Of excitement? Nervousness? Anxiety? Perhaps all three of them. He wasn't entirely sure, but he knew one thing:
This was an opportunity Lan Wangji could not miss out on.
As much as he did not fancy crowded spaces, loud noises, and flashy theatrics, he was going to go to this years pride march… and approach Wei Ying. To do what? Confess? Absolutely not. But he wanted to show him. Show him that he was here, too. That he was interested in men — or one man, at least.
He knew many attended such events dressed to leave quite a message, but Lan Wangji could not do the same. He wore his usual outfit, white slacks and a light blue button-up shirt, accentuated by a blue suit jacket. And yet he felt off attending a pride march without at least some kind of special accessory, and so — with his brother's assistance — he had located a local queer artist to fashion him a pair of tasteful rainbow-flag cufflinks. They didn't quite match the rest of his attire, but he supposed that wasn't their purpose to begin with.
He had his shoulder bag packed the afternoon before: A 1.5L stainless steel bottle containing warm — not hot — orange peel tea, his wallet containing his ID and emergency contacts (attached by a chain to the interior of the bag), his phone (similarly attached to the bag), a portable charger, and a pouch with emergency medical equipment.
With his attire in check, sunscreen applied, and his bag fully packed, Lan Wangji was finally ready to go — that is, physically much more so than emotionally. His whole being was still buzzing with the concept that was approaching Wei Ying at any sort of pride event, to be faced with and acknowledge that not only was he queer, but so was the subject of his desire.
Regardless, Lan Wangji was as ready as he was ever going to be, grabbed his things and started his not-yet-pride march towards the bus stop, every step filled with trepidation. He had chosen not to share a ride with his brother — though Lan Xichen was allowed to express himself and his identity with any clothes (or lack thereof) as he desired and Lan Wangji would always support him, his support didn't require his desire to lay his eyes upon his brother's choices. That was, in his humble opinion, a task he'd gladly leave for Nie Mingjue to take over.
The pride parade/march/whatever was — for a lack of better words — fucking banging. The march itself had come and gone, loud and boisterous and colorful and full of people here to be their whole unfiltered selves. It had come to a rest by a large park, taking advantage of the empty grassy space with various stands of — as he had been told — local LGBT businesses selling thematic snacks and trinkets and accessories and anything else you could think of. A stage had been erected and the live music playing was either good enough to dance to, or loud enough for Wei Wuxian to not even hear it and rather absorb the sound through the vibrations in the ground like roots soaking up water or whatever.
He had been abandoned by this point; him and Nie Huaisang had split off from Nie Mingjue and Lan Xichen shortly after arriving, and by now Nie Huaisang had disappeared, too. It wasn't surprising, though, Nie Huaisang was flighty, the type to come and go as he please, impossible to be tethered to one place, free like the birds he favored so much.
No problem at all. If Wei Wuxian was good at anything (and he considered himself to be good at quite a few things, a Jack of all trades, if you will) it was making friends with complete strangers. Thus he eventually spotted his target — a small table erected by a coffee stand, currently hosting two girls and a guy — and promptly planted himself at their table, forcing his presence upon them.
"So," Wen Qing — as he had deduced by the fact that the other girl at the table (who's name he'd have yet to determine) had called her A-Qing, and the fact that the boy at the table (who had politely, albeit shyly, introduced himself as Wen Ning) had called her Jiejie — drawled eventually, "Tell me again why a straight boy decided to crash our outing during a pride parade?"
"A-Qing, don't be mean," the mystery girl chided so gently, it could hardly be called that. "You never know, you know. Maybe he's an egg?"
"I have you know that I am very much not an egg, thank you very much!" Wei Wuxian responded with fake offense, but Wen Qing hardly took his words serious to begin with.
"Do you even know what an egg is, straight boy?"
"Of course I do! Eggs are the hard-shelled vessel within which birds spend their first stage of life," Wei Wuxian responded with a proud, beaming gleam, but judging by the almost pitying looks he received by both Wen Ning and the mystery girl, as well has the gloating smirk from Wen Qing, he assumed he may have to study up on the reproductive biology of birds and other reptiles again after all.
Bemoaning his failed egg-xam (heh) had to wait, though, as a familiar, "A-Xian!!!" suddenly caught his ears. He jumped up from his seat within record speed.
"Ladies. Gentleman. Excuse me for a moment," he said in his most mock-politest voice, before spinning around, arms already spread wide, and cried out his loudest, "JIEJIE!!!"
"A-Xian!" Jiang Yanli cried out again, practically crashing into her brother's offered hug. They stayed like this for a few seconds, squeezing each other, before Jiang Yanli finally let go, her hands sliding from around Wei Wuxian across his arms to finally hold his hands and squeeze them.
"A-Jie!" Wei Wuxian chirped, practically vibrating with the thrill to get to see the bestest sister in the whole world here. He hadn't expected her at all!!! In fact…
"A-Jie!? Why are you here?" He suddenly asked, realizing that his straight sister betrothed to a straight man was attending a pride event. "No— Wait! Don't tell me!? Did the peacock turn out to be gay? Is that why he's been so weird about you!?"
"A-Xian, be nice," Jiang Yanli chastised with a gentle pat to his arm. "No, Xianxian, I'm here for you, of course! In support!"
"For me!?" Wei Wuxian puzzled, before the pieces slowly started to click together. "Awww, A-Jie, you came so I wouldn't be alone? You're the best!" Then, dramatically, he threw his head back, a hand to his forehead. "You don't know how lonely it's been without Sangsang! All alone, as the only straight guy around…"
"Oh yes, the plights of being straight," Wen Qing quipped, which, rude! They were having a private conversation in front of her and her dates and her brothers table. But he was going to ignore her regardless.
"Jiejie, it's so nice to not be the only straight ally here!" He practically sang as he pulled his sister into another hug, hardly even registering the small, "Straight ally…?" she muttered out.
Several hours had passed before Lan Wangji had managed to get a hold of Wei Ying. He'd had to consult in his brother's and Nie Huaisang's help to find him, had to purchase ear plugs halfway through his search, but he's finally received a text from Nie Huaisang, confirming Wei Ying's location.
Though the main event was largely hosted on a mostly empty patch of grass, it was neighboring a botanical garden, including a small bamboo grove that had, if the muffled laughter and chatter was anything to go by, quite a few people hiding within. Lan Wangji wasn't surprised. Though the grove wasn't too hard to traverse, the densely growing bamboo provided much cover from anyone outside it.
"Nie-xiong it's fine!" Lan Wangji could finally hear Wei Ying's drawled voice, and he sped up his steps until it's owner was finally within sight. And— Oh. What a sight it was.
Lan Wangji had been pining for Wei Ying for the better part of the past five years, has seen him in more alluring outfits than he could count. He's yearned for him in his most casual clothes, yearned for him when dressed to impress at parties, he's even been there to witness Wei Ying's attempt at cleaning up for his summer job last year.
He's never seen him dressed both so revealing, while also so captivating. Granted — Wei Ying went swimming more often than not every summer (and occasionally during winter), and he had seen Wei Ying in nothing but his swim trunks before. But even those had hidden more than the short skirt he was wearing now, nearly too short to even cover the whole of Wei Ying's perfect ass, instead showing it off like a prize to behold.
"Fine? Wei Wonderboy Wuxian, what did I tell you about drugs from strangers!?" Nie Huaisang responded in a tone surprisingly serious for the flighty boy and much in contrast to his flashy attire.
"Dru— Sangsang, it's weed, that hardly counts, does it???" Wei Ying retorted in a tone that sounded an awful lot like he was being genuine. Nie Huaisang sighed, a hand massaging the bridge of his nose. "Besides, they're having it, too! How bad could it be!?"
Them being a pair of youths Wei Ying pointed to, two boys sitting only a few meters from them, definitely aged too young to be smoking any kind of substances, even more so than Wei Ying was.
"If they jumped off a cliff, would you follow them?" Nie Huaisang asked, and to his dismay, rather than respond immediately, Wei Ying seemed to drift off in contemplation. "Wei Wuxian!"
"Well! I mean!!! It depends what's on the bottom of the cliff, right!?" Wei Ying cried and the two far too young boys cackled quietly.
"Lord give me strength…" Nie Huaisang whispered to himself, before planting both his hands onto Wei Ying's shoulders to pin him with a stare. "You do not follow strangers off cliffs. You do not take drugs from strangers. God knows what they might've mixed their weed with."
"God's long gone, gege!" One of the boys drawled, waving an arm theatrically at them, but Nie Huaisang ignored him. Instead he turned Wei Ying around to face Lan Wangji and marched the boy over towards him.
"Now, be a good boy and stay with Wangji-ge, yes?" Nie Huaisang said patronizingly as Lan Wangji got to watch Wei Ying's pupils blow out in size. Lan Wangji could feel heat traveling up his face.
"LAN ZHAN!!!" Wei Ying called out much louder than should be appropriate in a public — or any — setting, practically throwing himself onto him.
"He's your problem now," Nie Huaisang said as he passed Lan Wangji with a hint of a wink, then left.
"Sangsang's mean," Wei Wuxian pouted, letting his full weight drop onto Lan Zhan's side. Lan Zhan had found them both a more secluded area in the bamboo grove, before Wei Wuxian started crying about his legs being tired (he had been dancing a lot only a bit ago, and his body was starting to feel awfully heavy…) and the two of them decided to plop down on the ground for a little rest.
"Huaisang cares for your safety," Lan Zhan responded in a tone that almost sounded like he couldn't believe the words he was saying himself. Wei Wuxian cackled in response, then cackled more when he's earned himself one of Lan Zhan's amused huffs.
Lan Zhan dug through his bag to pull out a shiny blue bottle offering it to him.
"So pretty!" Wei Wuxian awed, wrapping his hands around the bottle tenderly, like holding it too tightly may break it into pieces. The bottle was slim and elegant, just like Lan Zhan himself, the paint having an almost chromatic sheen to it. Wei Wuxian turned it this way, then that way, inspecting it for any logos, but found none. Clean, minimalist, elegant, perfect, beautiful, elegant, perfect, shiny, and perfect. Just like Lan Zhan.
"Drink," Lan Zhan instructed after another amused huff escaped.
"Oh!" Wei Wuxian responded, letting Lan Zhan twist the lid open for him, before lifting the bottle to his mouth for a sip. "Wow!" He exclaimed when he finally lowered it again, smacking his lips together. "Lan Zhan!? Where do you get your water from? It's delicious!"
"It is tea," Lan Zhan corrected, which made a lot more sense, and Wei Wuxian smacked his forehead a little.
"Oh, duh! 'Course it is. That's some good fucking tea!"
"Language," Lan Zhan chastised, only for another fond huff to escape him when Wei Wuxian corrected himself with a small, "Fricking." Oh, he was having so much fun today! They were having so much fun today!
"Lan Zhan, Lan Zhan, isn't this so cool?" Wei Wuxian drawled, allowing Lan Zhan to retrieve his beautiful tea bottle before he swung his arms and legs around a little. "You and me and the pride parade march thingy. Oh my gosh, Lan Zhan!!! You like gay people, too!?"
Lan Zhan blinked at him. "Like…?"
"Y'know I would've thought— With your uncle and all. He seems like the homophobo-ic kind with how far up his ass that stick is."
Lan Zhan blinked again. Once. Then twice. "Shufu has come to terms with it."
"Huh? Terms… Oh!!! Your brother!" Wei Wuxian's eyes widened, his hands flying to Lan Zhan's shoulders as he shook him a little. "Oh my god, Lan Zhan!!! Your brother's gay! Didn't old man Qiren blow a fuse!?"
Lan Zhan grabbed Wei Wuxian's arms, stilling him gently before he responded. "Shufu took… time. Getting used to it."
Wei Wuxian could imagine it. Lan Qiren with a face redder than a tomato after catching his perfect nephew making out sloppy style with a large hunk of a bear. He was surprised the old man hadn't died of an aneurysm right then and there! He cackled at the thought, dropped onto his back laughing as he imagined Lan Qiren chasing a butt-naked Nie Mingjue out of their family home, sandal in hand ready to throw after him. Did the Lan family own sandals? Surely they had house shoes at the very least!
"S' so sweet of you to come here for your brother," Wei Wuxian drawled, looking up at Lan Zhan from where he was lying on the ground now. "Even with your uncle being so strict!"
"Wei Ying," Lan Zhan muttered and his golden eyes fixed onto him in a way that had Wei Wuxian enraptured. "I did not come for xiongzhang."
"Hrrm?" It was Wei Wuxian's turn to blink at Lan Zhan confused.
And if Lan Zhan's tone and fixed stare hadn't been enough to steal away all of Wei Wuxian's attention, the way he now shifted almost nervously, his eyes diverting for a split moment before focusing back on him, that most certainly did it. Lan Zhan was being… shy!? "I am… I, too, am fond of… men."
He was… what?
"Fond of…?"
"Men." Lan Zhan repeated, the single word feeling like a rock has been shoved into Wei Wuxian's throat and got stuck there.
Lan Zhan was fond of men? What the fuck was that supposed to mean!? Was Lan Zhan… kissing other men!?
"Other…?" Lan Zhan asked, and— Oh. Had he said that out loud? Well, it was too late to back out now, his face felt hot and his hands clammy.
"Lan Zhan!!!" He practically cried out, jumping up into a sitting position again. "How— How long!? Were you kissing guys this whole time!?"
"I was not—"
"Who!?" Wei Wuxian blurted out, unable to stop the stream of thoughts and questions now that he's opened the dam. "Nie Huaisang? No. That— That Su She guy!?" Lan Zhan made a face. Not him, then. Good, the thought of Lan Zhan kissing, or even so much as touching that wannabe Lan Zhan knockoff made him feel like gagging.
"Do you… dislike it?" Lan Zhan then asked, and while the answer was clearly, 'Yes, obviously, I fucking hate it!!!' Wei Wuxian halted before blurting those words out loud as well.
Because. Well. He was an ally, was he not? Nie Huaisang had kissed dudes, Nie Mingjue certainly was doing so on the regular. He's never had an issue with men liking other men, so why did the thought of Lan Zhan being with other guys rile him up even more than that time Jiang Cheng had insisted that Shadow The Hedgehog was a Crap Tier character design?
"Wei Ying?" Lan Zhan asked when he'd gone so uncharacteristically quiet for what must've been far too long, and there was nearly a nervous tremor in Lan Zhan's voice that made him feel so god damn frustrated with himself. He wasn't homophobic, for fucks sake! He didn't wanna find out he was homophobic after all all of a sudden, centralized specifically towards ethereal men looking like they've been carved out of marble.
"I— Lan Zhan!!!" He wasn't sure what he was saying, what he could say, what he should say, because nothing was making sense anymore. But Lan Zhan seemed to catch on to his frustration, his confusion, his utter inability of making any shred of sense, so he scooted a hint closer, enclosed one of Wei Wuxian's hands in both of his large ones.
"Would Wei Ying feel better if I kissed… women?"
And the thing was— it should, shouldn't it? That's sort of what he's always assumed, that Lan Zhan, like most people, was straight. That he'd find a girlfriend and kiss her and do other things with her and then they'd get married and she'd be the luckiest lady alive and they'd make a dozen little mini A-Zhans and Wei Wuxian would visit them every Tuesday and Friday and also every third Saturday and bribe all the tiny A-Zhans to make sure that he was their favorite uncle (although competition might be tough with Lan Xichen in the mix) and teach them how to cause an inappropriate amount of mayhem in their strict little Lan household.
But that thought didn't exactly make him feel great either. Better maybe. More used to. Less like an open wound and more like an aching bruise. So if he didn't like Lan Zhan kissing guys, and he didn't like Lan Zhan kissing girls either, was he still being homophobic? What was he? Zhanphobic!?
His feelings on the matter seem to have translated well to his expression, as Lan Zhan's thumb was now gently caressing the back of Wei Wuxian's hand.
And then he said, "Would Wei Ying feel better if I kissed him?" And Wei Wuxian's brain shut off entirely.
Wei Ying was gaping at him like a fish pulled out of water and for a moment Lan Wangji kicked himself. He was going too far too fast. Wei Ying was very clearly reeling from the new information, very clearly overwhelmed by whatever thoughts or feeling they had dug up within him, not to mention that he was inebriated, affected by the marijuana he's had only a short time ago, even if only a little.
He wasn't sure how he felt about that. How he'd felt about the sudden anger, the frustration, the confusion. Hurt? Upset? Relieved? Hopeful? All of the above or none of it? Wei Ying had always been a myriad of riddles to him (and everyone around him) and his outburst now had only added onto the metaphorical corkboard of question marks within Lan Wangji's mind.
But— Wei Ying didn't refuse him. His eyes were blown wide, his face a crimson red, and his pupils— Lan Wangji caught them flicker down towards his lips, then back to Lan Wangji's eyes, then to the side, averting completely as the crimson only ripened in color.
He wants to, the devil on his shoulder (that sounded an awful lot like Nie Huaisang) whispered into his ear.
He is inebriated, the angel on his shoulder tried to argue, but its voice was awful hard to make out through the incessant, He's biting his lips! His shoulders are flushed! His throat is bobbing!
Lan Wangji was raised by his uncle to hold onto his restraint. He was raised to not take as he desired, to live frugally, to respect others and their boundaries.
And when he had turned twelve he had been taught, by Wei Ying, that to live a little sometimes you need to take a little. That his shufu's teachings were a great foundation to be a gentleman, but that it would lead to a thoroughly bland and empty future.
He had yet to quite grasp how much he was allowed to take and how much he ought to abstain. Perhaps this was not the right decision. Perhaps he would regret this later. And yet it had been Wei Ying that's told him, 'What's life without a little regret?' Hasn't it?
So — knowing full well that he was overstepping, that he should dial back, that he should retract and retract and stop — Lan Wangji leaned forward.
They had been close already, close enough that all it took was for Lan Wangji to take Wei Ying's chin and tilt his face slightly, to lean forward only a hint, before their lips were already touching, soft and hot and perfect.
At first Wei Ying stiffened and for a terrifying moment Lan Wangji thought that he's made a horrible miscalculation. But then, as if a switch had been flipped, the boy softened like putty under his palms and Lan Wangji had to react swiftly to wrap an arm around him to keep Wei Ying from falling backwards.
Wei Ying's hands found their way to Lan Wangji's cheeks, kneading them like dough under his palms, and incidentally keeping Lan Wangji in place, unable to break the kiss he had no desire to break to begin with. Instead he leaned in deeper, greedy teeth finding Wei Ying's lips to nibble and tug at them until their owner let out a wanton gasp, an invitation for Lan Wangji to explore the inside of his mouth.
When they finally did separate, both were panting, catching their breath. Wei Ying's eyes were hazy, his body slack as he leaned against Lan Wangji.
"Lan Zhan…" He practically whispered out after a few minutes of both of them recovering. "I think… I think I'm not a straight ally, after all…"
Lan Wangji blinked.
Straight ally…?