Chapter Text
Chapter 1-
The wind kicked up and blew a bit of sand toward Sebastian Moran. He leaned on the makeshift building and closed his eyes against the offending grit and debris. He hung his head, realizing he was tired. Bone dead tired. But then again, twenty hours on one’s feet tended to do that. Sebastian lit a cigarette and rubbed at his face, feeling the bits of dried blood and tears against his cheeks. He needed a hot meal, a good night's sleep, a shower, and a good shag. Not necessarily in that order. He shook his head and sighed.
Sebastian felt the weight of the world overwhelming him. He knew he had to make a choice. It was a choice that had been in the back of his mind for a long, long time. He knew it was time for a change. Time for something different. He stomped out his cigarette under the toe of his combat issued boot and headed away from the temporary hospital where he had spent the last five years of his life.
Sebastian Moran’s commanding officer was a squat man, with years of experience behind him. His hair was thin, his face weathered and his demeanour kind. He was efficient at running a hospital in a war zone and Sebastian was lucky that he was also easy to approach. Reasonable if nothing else.
Seb knocked on his door and waited until he was called in. He felt as if he had aged ten years in the last week. He slumped into the chair opposite Colonel Cable’s desk. Colonel Cable looked up from the file he had been working on and shook his head. “Moran. You look like shit.” Colonel Cable said, “No one would think you are what… 41?” Seb nodded.
“I feel it.” He sighed and shifted in his seat. “I think it’s time Bryan.” Colonel Bryan Cable looked at the other man and nodded. He knew what the tall blond former sniper was talking about. It had been the topic of conversation before and Cable knew that Sebastian had finally had enough. Having read the reports from the earlier shift, he wasn’t surprised. Sebastian Moran was finally asking to be sent home.
“Was it the number of casualties today or was it one in specific?” Cable asked Sebastian. He thought he might know, but he wanted to hear it from Seb himself. Colonel Cable was nothing if not efficient at running a hospital. He knew when a single patient had gotten under the skin of one of his crew.
“It was the young girl. The Afghan.” Seb closed his eyes and swallowed back his tears. “No young child should have to go through anything like that.”
Sebastian hated working in a war zone sometimes. It was the collateral damage that would eventually get to him. The constant bombings that would hurt the neighboring towns. The young men and women that came to see what they could survive on around the bombing sites and end up dead themselves. The young children with missing limbs and missing lives. It had all come to be too much. And after almost twenty years in the army, Sebastian was ready to return to London and the life he had left behind. Well… most of it.
“I can put through the paperwork….” Colonel Cable looked at his calendar and counted to himself. “I can make it work for the first of the month if you want.”
Sebastian nodded. Ten days. He could hang on for another ten days. “That’s good. That’s fine.” he said. He stood up and wobbled a bit on his feet before finding his legs again.
“I’ll have someone bring up something to eat for you. Go take a shower and sleep. You are off duty for the next twenty four hours.” Colonel Cable said while picking up his phone to process his orders. Sebastian could barely function enough to snap off a salute before stumbling up to his bunk, the shower and food.
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Two days later, Seb sat in the stuffy oven box of an office signing over his commission. A bit more than a week and he would no longer be an officer. He would no longer be in the army. He would be a civilian again. And he felt both relieved and scared at this prospect. No… not scared. Wary. He wasn’t sure what he was going to do when he got to London. Where was he going to live? How was he going to make money? Eat? He could always go and live with his father…. Dr. Augustus Moran. But no. Seb wouldn’t subject himself to that. His father’s disappointment in his chosen career path, the constant condescension at what he had decided to do with his life. It wasn’t worth the pain.
No. Seb wouldn’t go back there. He would find a rat infested bnb before he did that. Seb would have a few pounds in his pocket when he was discharged and he would find someplace to live. And a job… well… he’d worry about that later. He just knew that he wanted to sleep for a week.
“So…. you’ll ship home to Sandhurst on Monday.” Colonel Cable told Sebastian as he read through the papers. “Process out from there. You’ll be back in London by next weekend.” Sebastian caught something in the other man’s voice.
“Jealous?” He asked, a bit awed by that idea. That anyone would be jealous of something he did. He wasn't used to it. Nothing he’d ever done seemed enough to make anyone jealous.
“Why would I be? I have everything I could ever want here. Hot and cold running disease, sand in every bodypart you can imagine and a few that I didn’t know you could get sand in, idiots telling me what to do from comfortable chairs in other countries and people here who don’t do what I tell them.” He stretched out and placed his hands behind his head. “Why would I leave all this for London,” he said with a grin and a chuckle.
“Right. Figured as much.” Seb said, grinning himself. Ah… London. Home.
“What’s the plan then?”
“I honestly don’t know. I… I’ll have to find a job. And a place to stay… I… I have no idea where to start.” Seb smiled after a moment. “Well, maybe I do. I could start with the pub, a good cold beer, steak and kidney pie and a month long shower.”
“Good plan,” Colonel Cable said after a bit. He leaned across the desk. “I’ll miss you but get the fuck out,” he said, dismissing Sebastian. Seb stood up and saluted his boss.
“Yes Sir!” He smiled and offered his hand. “It’s honestly been a pleasure.”
“Same here. Good luck.” Sebastian shook his hand and left the office without a second thought. He had two more shifts on base, a few people to say goodbye too and he was gone. Back to England and from there… home.
It was just before dawn when he left the base. He climbed into the helicopter, taking one last look at the place that had been his home for the last five years. It was easier to see the beauty in it from up above. He turned his attention away with a snap of his neck and looked out towards the mountains. It was still the purple twilight of the early dawn and Seb watched as the sun rose above the peaks. He watched as the desert came alive with the rising sun.
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Sebastian pulled his jacket tighter around him. He had gotten so used to the warmth of the desert that the cold dreary rain of London was downright arctic to him. It had only been two weeks since he had left Sandhurst, and all he had to show for it was a rundown flat, a rapidly dwindling bankaccount and no job. True, he wasn’t exactly running out every advert that he saw in the papers, but he wasn’t standing around and waiting for things on a silver platter either.
He hunched his shoulder into the rest of his six foot three inch frame, trying to conserve heat. It was downright cold in his opinion. But he heard a voice that made him stand up straighter and snap to attention. “Moran!” the voice bellowed. Seb stood stock still on the pavement and waited. The speaker knew from vast experience that the voice would find him. Military training died hard in career soldiers.
“Moran! You are out of a uniform!” the voice stated, a bit quieter now but with no less command. Sebastian heard feet come around to the front of him and he smiled as he relaxed.
“Sir… I mean um…. Hello,” he stammered.
“Sebastian,” Dr slash Captain John Watson said with a smile. “What the bloody hell are you doing in London, mate?”
“John. It’s good to see you.” Seb reached out his hand and shook John’s. “Discharged. Gave it up. Couldn’t… just couldn’t do it any more,” Seb admitted. John gave him a knowing smile and a nod.
“Fancy a pint? I was on my way to the pub,” John offered.
“Please. Haven’t seen a friendly face in weeks.”
---0000---
The pub was quiet for a weekday afternoon and Sebastian was thankful for that. He sipped at his pint, happy for the taste. Nothing beat a fresh ale in a pub in the center of London. He looked up at John and decided that he would just dive right into the conversation.
“So… um… Captain… how are things here for you? You married that girl back home? Private practice? The whole family dream?” Seb asked with a smile.
“Me?” John asked and shook his head as he chuckled. “No… nothing I thought that I would want when I got back. All the things I talked about on those late nights… all the things I dreamed of… no. They didn’t come true.” John took a long pull of his own pint and looked in the distance for a moment. “I came home to find my girl wasn’t who I thought she was, my dreams of a quiet private practice were… boring and dull. Family life, not in the cards. At least not in the way I expected,” John admitted.
“I’m sorry to hear that,” Seb said quietly.
“What about you? How long have you been back then? Working?”
“I’ve been in London… what, about two weeks now. I haven’t found a job as of yet. There isn’t much here that.. That would be quite right,” Seb said with a shrug. “Father wanted me to go back to school. But honestly John, this dog is too old and too tired to train for new tricks.”
“I… excuse me if this is too bold, but I know of a job opening. Happened this morning as a matter of fact. And if you wanted… I could put in a good word for you,” John offered.
“Really?” Seb asked, narrowing his eyes. “Where?”
“Bart’s. The oncology ward just lost a nurse.” John shook his head. “They’ve run through twelve in the last six weeks alone. What they need is someone who is caring, passionate about helping people and well… someone tough. I’ve seen all of that in you. You are one cold arsed fucker when you want to be, but I’ve seen you cry over the loss of a child.”
Sebastian sat back in his chair for a bit and considered it. If John Watson thought it would be a right fit for him, then maybe it would be. Then again what did Sebastian have to lose at this point? “Two nurses ran away every week in the last six weeks?” he said to John. “Is the position haunted or something?”
“No,” John said with a chuckle. “It’s just, well, the head doctor, he’s a bit difficult to get along with.”
“Can’t be worse than Dr. Augustus Moran,” Seb said under his breath.
“You’d be surprised,” John retorted. “But really. Tell you what. Give us your number then and I’ll talk to Dr. Holmes. Sherlock might be a bit of a… well an arse, but he’ll listen to me if I think there would be someone to work with… the unit.”
“Okay… if you think that it will be… right, then I’ll give it a try,” Seb agreed. “Is there anyone who’s lasted on the unit?” he asked after a while.
“One,” John admitted. “He’s good. He’s wonderful with the patients but other than that…. It’s hard to get a read on him in general.” John shook his head. “You’re good at reading people. Maybe you can figure him out.”
“Maybe.” Seb said. He smiled at John and turned the conversation to gossip about the base.
