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The smell of Gerard's basement hit Frank before the door was even fully open. An almost acrid scent muddled with stale weed. He was familiar enough with the stench, having been around Gerard so much lately, but it was stronger here, in his hovel.
“Fucking Christ, dude. You need to be opening your windows, air this place out a little.”
Frank kicked off his shoes and moved to do just that, pushing his way through the piles littered on the floor. Gerard's room felt like his soul had exploded all over the floor and the walls. Projects lined the perimeter, collectables and comic issues were on every shelf, and clothes piled into stacks on the ground. It would’ve been overwhelming- if not for the fact that it was all so Gerard, comforting in a way Frank couldn’t describe. Despite the chaos, it was organized, with clear paths marking the way from the door to the desk, to the bed. Frank only had to shuffle around a small pile of what was probably dirty laundry to reach the window.
Gerard stepped fully into the room and shut the door behind himself, “I’d open it more often if it weren't so cold. Leave it closed for now, I need to warm up a little.”
They had just come back from a small show at some bar near the Way’s home, close enough that they could walk, but far enough that they could both feel the way the cold had seeped through their coats and into their skin. As much as Frank longed for a breath that didn’t smell like Gerard, if only to clear his head a bit, he had to admit he was still freezing his ass off.
Still, it was in his nature to argue a little.
“C’mon, Gee, it reeks in here. Have you been hotboxing the whole fucking room?”
“Get over yourself." Gerard lazily weaved his hand through the air, flapping it in Frank's direction, “I’m sure you must be used to it by now. I can't imagine your place smells much better.”
Frank, feeling vaguely insulted by this, shook his head vehemently. “No man, I don’t do that shit. And I'm clean.” He kicked a pile of Gerard's clothes for emphasis.
Gerard didn’t bother to look at any additional mess Frank may have made; he kept his eyes locked right on Franks. “Like, you quit?”
“Like, I never started.”
“You’ve never smoked?”
“No.”
“Never ever?”
“Jesus Christ! No.” Frank threw his hands up, not understanding Gerard's fixation on this, and definitely not trusting that glint in his eyes. That look usually means Gerard has gotten an idea, which usually means trouble.
“Frank.” Gerard leaned forward and rested his hand on Frank's upper arm. His face was so close that he could feel Gerard’s warm breath ghost down his cheek. His long hair tickled his jaw. Frank tried not to flex his arm under Gerard's hand, but he couldn’t control the heat blooming across his cheeks. Gerard leaned even closer, tilted his mouth towards Frank's ear. He had no idea what was happening, what had possessed Gerard to pounce on him like this. He stood stock still and hoped that Gerard couldn't see his pulse beating through his throat.
“Let me pop your cherry.”
Frank felt his breath still in his chest. He had prayed for times like these, but was finding himself to be woefully unprepared now that they were finally finally upon him. He reflexively tried to step back, out of Gerard’s hold, but he simply tightened his grip, and Frank was still once more. Except for his dick, which kicked up in his jeans. Frank sent up another prayer for Gerard’s obliviousness.
“Wh- what. What.”
Gerard tossed his head back on a laugh, three quick ha’s in rapid succession. He moved his hand from Frank's arm to his shoulder and lightly shoved him back, “Smoke with me, Frankie! I can’t believe we haven’t before, God, a first timer too! I’ve been neglecting you.” He was shaking his head back and forth lightly, a bright smile lighting up his face, his small teeth all on display.
Frank stayed silent. He usually found it hard to refuse Gerard, but it was especially difficult when he was looking at him like that. Even so, he hesitated to jump into an agreement; mostly, he felt nervous. And slightly disappointed that he wasn’t offering something else. Frank knew how he got when he was drunk, touchy, loud. Horny. And he was with Gerard. Alone. He couldn’t imagine himself high, how he would act. He was terrified he'd make an ass of himself. He knew weed could make people feel relaxed, but he was fearful of getting too relaxed. Or maybe not relaxed enough. Fuck, he felt like an idiot. He was embarrassing himself enough sober.
Seemingly oblivious, or more likely, ambivalent to Frank's internal battle, Gerard had already made his way to his desk and was digging through one of the drawers.
“Gerard, I’m not so sure-”
“Ohhh, come on, Frank! It’ll be fun. We’ll put on a movie or something. Relax.” Gerard rummaged around his drawer for another second before brandishing a lighter in one hand and a tube in the other, “A-ha!”
Gerard put both items in his pocket and moved to the TV perched on his desk, “Sit down, Frankie. Empire Strikes Back?”
“For the fortieth time? Sure, man.” Frank was only still a second longer before perching himself on the edge of Gerard's bed, the one place in the room unoccupied by clutter, though Frank kind of wanted just to take his chances on the floor. Everything was starting to feel like too much. Stuck down here with the smell of Gerard everywhere, no places to sit except for right next to each other, no Mikey or Ray to distract Frank from the feeling in his chest every time he so much as looked at Gerard lately.
Gerard tsked at him, “fuck off. It’s a masterclass of cinema.”
He tried to calm himself down, did some of those breathing exercises his mom was so fond of. It’s not like this was a big deal. He’s an adult. Pot’s legal. He trusts Gerard completely. He didn’t understand why he couldn’t just calm down. He balled his fists on top of his thighs and stared at the floor, told himself that even if he acted weird, Gerard was the only witness and would be the last person to judge him.
The mattress dipped behind him, he turned around to see Gerard settling into the middle of the bed, folding his legs underneath him. Frank tried not to stare at the way his thighs flexed in his skinny jeans.
“Frankie, c’mere.” Frank sighed and followed Gerard’s direction, sitting crisscrossed in front of him. Gerard shot him a soft smile and pulled the tube and lighter from his pocket. He popped the tube open, and a strong waft of weed hit Frank's nostrils. “Okay, so! This is a hybrid preroll, you smoke it just like a cig, but it’s a little harsher, so go slow, okay? It can be easy to overdo it. Pace yourself.”
Frank scoffed. “Jesus Gee, it’s not my first day on Earth. I think I’ll be okay.”
Huffing out a laugh, Gerard placed the preroll between his lips. “I know that, Frankie, but I’d be a bad sitter if I didn’t give you the preamble.”
Frank barely focused on what Gerard was saying, fixating on the way his mouth moved around the joint. He watched his hands come up around it, the flex of his fingers around the lighter. The small flame illuminated Gerard's face, making the contours of his cheeks that much more prominent; he looked almost doll-like, soft, but angular all at once. When he inhaled, he looked up at Frank, his big eyes glowing in the light, hollowing his cheeks a bit more than what actually may be necessary. Frank's mouth felt very dry.
“Okay, ready?” As Gerard spoke, soft swirls of smoke drifted from his mouth. Frank watched it dissipate before grabbing the joint from Gerard's outstretched hand. He tried to avoid brushing Gerard's fingers with his own, but the way he was holding it and the length of the filter made it nearly impossible. He hoped Gerard would ignore the slight shake in his fingers. Frank brought the joint to his own lips, feeling the slight wetness that Gerard had left behind. He had expected this to be the case, but was still caught off guard. He tried not to fixate on it. He ignored Gerard’s advice on his first inhale, when he was this anxious and smoking a cigarette to calm down, he knew that the deeper an inhale he took, the quicker the calming effect of nicotine set in. He figured the same rules applied here and wanted to just get it over with while still appeasing Gerard.
He should have listened to Gerard’s warning.
“Oh- fuck!” Frank stuttered around a cough. The smoke left his lungs in quick staccato puffs. Fuck, his chest burned.
Gerard burst out a laugh, almost doubling over with the force of it. “Oh my God! I told you to go slow! Are you okay?”
Frank could barely understand what Gerard was saying through all of his giggling. He felt his face flame in embarrassment, and probably a slight lack of oxygen. He couldn't respond with any effectiveness anyway; he was still hacking up his lungs, so he started to flap his empty hand at Gerard, hitting his shoulder and chest a couple of times. Gerard’s laughter finally slowed down, and he grabbed Frank's hand to stop any more wayward attacks.
“Frankie, can I try something? It may help you.”
With the way Gerard was looking at him- smile soft, eyes crinkled in the corners- and the way he held his hand gently in his lap, rubbing his thumb over Frank’s knuckles and brushing over the tattoos there, Gerard could have asked him for anything, and he would bend over backwards to do it. Whatever kept him looking at him like that. Frank couldn’t say this in any way without sounding insane, so he just nodded.
Gerard plucked the joint from Frank's loose fingers, mumbled out a soft “c’mere” that Frank was certain he wouldn’t have heard if he wasn’t already leaning into him. Gerard used his free hand to cup the back of Frank's neck and pulled him closer. Frank could count Gerard’s eyelashes from this close, could see every light freckle on his face. He could feel his own heart hammering in his chest, like it was gearing up to explode at any second. “Open your mouth a little bit.”
Frank did as he was told, even though he wasn’t really sure what was happening.
Gerard took another drag, held his breath, and leaned in even closer. Frank closed his eyes. When Gerard pressed his lips to Franks, the touch was so light he could barely even feel it, but his nerves were so attuned to Gerard anyway that it felt like his synapses were overfiring to the point of shutdown. He was frozen, maybe he had died, and rigor mortis was settling in. Either way, he was in some type of heaven. Gerard exhaled into Frank's mouth and pushed himself a little further into him to seal the vacuum a bit better. At the same time, he moved his thumb in small circles on the back of Frank's neck, up into his hair, and then back down. His spine was tingling. “Breathe, Frankie. Slow.” Gerard had to remind him.
Frank's brain finally caught up to what was happening. He inhaled. Slowly this time, as instructed. It still burned, but much less now that Gerard had diluted the hit for him. Gerard's lips moved over Frank's once more, catching his bottom lip so quick and light he could convince himself it was unintentional. Gerard leaned back, but kept his hand on Frank's neck. “Better?”
Frank still kind of felt like his brain was melting, and wasn't fully able to keep the tremble out of his voice when he nodded and said, “Yes, better. Thank you for baby birding me.” Gerard nodded sagely, “Anytime, my little nestling.” He took another hit, breathing deeply before exhaling directly into Frank's face. Frank let the cloud wash over him and hoped that on the walk home, he’d air out enough that his mother wouldn’t ask him any questions when he got there. He briefly wondered if Gerard would just let him stay here for the night.
“Do you think you got this one on your own, or do you want help again?” Frank was starting to feel his muscles relax, a light fog settling over his thoughts, even still, he was sure that if he let Gerard do that again, he actually would die. Immediately.
“I think I’ve got it.” Gerard just nodded and leaned back against the wall, settling himself into the pillows. He patted the space next to him. “Lay down, it's easier to pass that way. I don’t wanna reach.”
Frank lay down next to Gerard. The weed made him less anxious than he usually would have been; his body felt loose for once, and he was almost giddy with the realization. Bolstered by the feeling, he took a deep drag, only choking a little this time. He looked towards Gerard to offer him the joint, but Gerard was already looking at him, his gaze intense despite the slight glaze already shining in his eyes. Frank tried to pass it over but Gerard shook his head, “have another one, Frankie,” Frank felt a little apprehensive, he could feel the high setting in pretty strong now. He wasn’t sure if he really needed another hit so soon, but Gerard’s stare felt so heavy on him, and he trusted him not to lead him astray. Frank took another, deeper hit and exhaled, aiming towards Gerard this time. Gerard just smirked and took the joint back. Inhale. Exhale.
===
The night continued like that for a while. Between the two of them, they had just about polished off the joint. Frank's head was swimming. His body felt so heavy, like a stone on Gerard's mattress, sinking down, down, down. He could hear the movie in the background, but nothing was fully registering to him. He opted to stare at the swirling smoke in the air and study Gerard's more recent projects through the haze. He was particularly interested in what seemed to be a new sculpture, but his eyes were so heavy and unfocused, and the room was so clouded that he could hardly discern what he was looking at. This frustrated him greatly. With what felt like a tremendous effort, he flopped his arm onto Gerard's chest, “Gee.”
Gerard jolted up. “Fucking shit man! You scared me, I thought you had fallen asleep.”
Frank must have been still a lot longer than he thought, but he couldn’t worry about that right now. He had a goal. A mission. “Gee. Window.” He waved his hand towards the window in question, then flopped his arm back down onto Gerard.
Gerard looked down at Frank, whipped his head towards the window, then back down at Frank, cocking an eyebrow. “What about it?”
Frank didn’t understand why Gerard was asking him stupid fucking questions when he felt it was pretty clear what he wanted. Instead of extending any effort to tell Gerard this, he decided he would take it upon himself to deal with the situation. He pulled himself to his knees; his head swam so quickly that he toppled over Gerard. His arms were on the floor; he could feel his torso folded over the edge of the bed, his legs draped across Gerard's chest.
“Oof- fuck!” Frank could feel one of Gerard’s hands trapped under his thigh, while the other slowly skimmed up the length of his calf. The touch lit up his nerve endings so rapidly that Frank felt lightheaded with it. He was so attuned to the touch that it was like he could feel it directly on his skin, rather than through his denim jeans. Between the high and Gerard, he felt fairly close to collapsing. Heat was pooling in his gut. He could feel his dick start to swell, twitching in his pants. It usually didn’t take much to get Frank interested, especially where Gerard was involved. But this was something else. It was so intense. Want hit him like a freight train. He had to fight off the urge to thrust onto Gerard's thigh. He was used to getting horny when he was drunk, but nothing could’ve prepared him for this. He was suddenly grateful for the room spinning like it was; it gave him something else to focus on other than the fact that a slight breeze could probably make him cum in his jeans. God, he needed to get a grip.
“Frank. Frankie, your ass is kind of in my face.”
Frank hissed, ‘fuck, m’sorry.”
Gerard chuckled a bit, “It’s okay. It’s a good ass.” Gerard lightly smacked Frank's cheek, just hard enough that he could feel the slight sting through his jeans. If Frank was worried about a breeze sending him over the edge, he was absolutely fucked now. His dick fluffed up more, and he pulled himself the rest of the way off of Gerard and onto the floor so fast he folded over himself. He prayed to any god he could think of as quickly as he could that Gerard hadn’t felt the press of his cock getting harder against him, but he was too terrified to look at him to verify. Frank managed to pull himself upright and walk over towards the window, taking the path he had half-formed earlier. He kind of felt like he was learning to walk again, but he hoped the unintentional baby deer routine distracted enough from the growing erection pressing against his zipper.
When he got to the window, he pressed his forehead against the cool glass, watched his breath form against it. He exhaled onto the glass and drew his name in the condensation, hoping it would be visible next time the glass fogged up, that it would always be there even if Gerard never noticed it. At least he would know it was there, that he had marked the place in some small way.
Frank pushed the window open, fighting against the old frame. The fresh night air hit him almost violently, and he was deeply grateful for it. He gulped in breaths of it, felt his head clear a bit with every deep inhale. Once he calmed down and his situation figured itself out, Frank turned back into the room. Gerard had sat up on the bed, feet on the floor, watching Frank. The room had stopped spinning, thank god, but Frank could still feel the heaviness of his limbs, the fogginess in his head. He was still well and truly gone, but at least he could see straight now- the buzz turning back into something pleasant, rather than feeling like a sickness.
Gerard just sat, his eyes following Frank as he moved back to the bed, but his stumbling had caused him to step too far out of the path, and he caught his foot in a pile of clothes. Under any other circumstance, when Frank had more control of his limbs, he’s sure he could have caught himself, or at least not positively ate shit the way he knew he was about to. The fogginess of the high made everything feel like it was happening in slow motion; he was almost outside of himself. He vaguely understood that the reality of it was not as dramatic as that, but he couldn't focus on that when the ground was rapidly approaching his face. He watched Gerard try to move to catch him, but he was clumsy enough sober, and he knew there was no shot in hell he would be able to brace Frank from the impact. When Frank finally landed, it was face down into a pile of discarded paper and laundry. He stayed prone on the floor, save for lacing his hands over his head, and let out a pained little whine.
Gerard was silent for all of two seconds before bursting into deep belly laughs. Frank was intensely embarrassed; his chest felt tight with it. He had definitely overindulged- he was ashamed he was struggling to hold it together, felt panicky at the realization he had overextended limits he hadn’t even known he had. The longer Gerard’s laughter went on, his embarrassment turned to indignation.
Frank flopped himself onto his back and stared up at Gerard, who fell to his knees next to him, breathless and giggling. “Man, shut the fuck up. I could have died. And you’re laughing at me.”
Gerard could barely speak through his fit, but Frank could make out a jumble of “sorry’ and “wouldn’t have died,” and “tried to help.”
Frank scoffed, “This room is full of shit! I could’ve been impaled on God knows what.” He threw his hands up in the air, but listening to Gerard’s loud laughter assuaged any actual frustration he may have felt. He couldn’t help but laugh a little, too, which helped to ease his panic a bit.
After Gerard had calmed down, he put his hand down onto Frank's shoulder, squeezed it gently, “Anything broken? Any wounds I should be aware of? Should I get out my nurse outfit?” Frank sighed, pretending to think about it. He thought of faking some injury, just to see if Gerard actually had a nurse's outfit. Frank was almost positive he had stroked himself to that exact fantasy, and quickly decided it was better if he didn’t know. He moved his head side to side, “I think I’ll live, no thanks to you.”
Gerard slapped his shoulder before getting up and standing over him, feet bracketing both of Frank's thighs. He looked powerful like this, dominating. Frank can’t say he wasn’t appreciating the view, but looked away before his dick could get as excited as his brain- although at this point, he was reasonably sure he’d be sporting a semi for the rest of the night. He was still trying to get rid of the image of Gerard in a nurse's uniform. “I said I tried! I was going to help you up, but now I think I’ll leave you to rot down there.”
Frank didn’t doubt that Gerard actually would just walk away to let Frank fend for himself, but he honestly wasn’t sure if he’d be able to coordinate his limbs enough to stand without falling right back down.
“No, please, I'm sorry. Thank you for trying. Help me up. Please, Gee.” Frank put on his best puppy dog eyes and looked up at Gerard. He stuck his hands in the air, reaching for him and wiggling his fingers. Gerard put his hands on his hips and looked down at Frank with heavy-lidded eyes. Frank tried his best to keep eye contact, but he could feel the blush blooming across his face and down his neck. His whole body was overly hot. He thought maybe it was a bad idea to have Gerard help him after all. It would be less embarrassing for Frank if he could limit the amount of contact he had with Gerard; he had just about given up hope that he was going to help him anyway. Frank pulled his legs up, planted his feet on the floor, and geared up to pull his body the rest of the way when Gerard sighed and grabbed his hands, “Fine, I’ll help. Just because you beg so nicely.”
Frank let Gerard pull him up, his words ringing in his ears. He was putting up a valiant attempt at not getting ridiculously, noticeably, hard and making things weird for everyone, but his blood felt so hot. Gerard just touching his hands made his whole body tingle, and fuck, the things Gerard said. Frank thought he was lucky he still had any blood left in his brain. With one last tug, Frank was upright, but the force of the pull sent him stumbling into Gerard. Gerard braced his hands on Frank's biceps; it felt like they were touching everywhere. He could feel Gerard's soft chest against his. He had never been more aware of their height difference, slight as it seemed normally- this close, it felt like Gerard was enveloping him. Frank felt his dick rub slightly against Gerard's thigh. He breathed in sharply and felt his face flame. He was humiliated, Gerard wasn’t doing anything, and he had Frank's dick twitching with interest. He felt like a slut, which really only turned him on that bit more. The need he felt and the shock of embarrassment held him in place. Gerard's soft huff of breath against his cheek hit him like a defibrillator, and he jolted backwards. The grip Gerard kept on Frank's arms didn’t let him get very far, but at least at this distance, he's less at risk of humping Gerard's leg like a dog.
Gerard spins them around so the back of his legs are pressed against the bed, laughs, and throws himself backwards. He was still holding on to Frank's arms, tight enough that the movement sent Frank toppling after him. He lands sprawled across Gerard's chest, their legs tangled together and half-dangling off the mattress. Frank is panicking mentally, but his body is slow to catch up with the program. He wants to stretch out on top of Gerard, absorb his heat. The high makes him feel stupid; his body is like a different entity at this point. Taking every sense and exploding the experience like a supernova within him. Everywhere he and Gerard connect is lighting him up; his erection is hitting him with force, so quick he’s surprised he doesn’t pass out, making him think he should crawl his way back to the open window. Instead, he half buries his face in Gerard’s neck, inhaling him where his scent is strong against his pulse; he fights the urge to bite him.
Frank feels like he’s chasing something, and unconsciously, his body pushes a little bit further for it. He rocks his hips gently against whatever part of Gerard is pressed against him. Possibly a hip, but the heat that pools in Frank's belly makes him grateful for whatever it was, has him gasping against Gerard's throat.
It’s only when he feels the shift of Gerard adjusting under him that reminds Frank this isn't one of his half-baked fantasies he'd dream up before bed. This was real and happening, and he’d just rubbed his dick against his best friend and longtime crush. The realization of what he’d done made him want to curl into himself; the pressure of humiliation made his chest feel like it was collapsing. He needed to leave. As quick as his traitorous body would allow. He tried to crawl off of Gerard, a half-formed apology already climbing up his throat.
“Oh my God- I should leave. I’m gonna-” Frank was desperately trying to rip himself off of Gerard, to touch him as little as possible as he did so. Gerard stayed quiet, watched Frank babble and flop around as he tried to get away from him. Frank felt like such an ass. His heartbeat was pounding in his ears. Gerard probably thought he was some disgusting, horny, desperate little creep. He was throwing their friendship down the drain, all because he couldn’t keep control of himself. Fuck, he knew smoking with him would be a bad idea. Gerard was never going to talk to him again, he just prayed Mikey wouldn’t kick his ass for making unwanted moves on his brother and-
“Frankie. Frankie, calm down. Good lord, you look like you’re about to keel over.” Gerard had followed him off the bed and was reaching out towards him, voice soft like he was talking down a scared animal. In a way, he was. Frank probably looked as freaked out as he felt. He felt Gerard's fingers circle his wrist, lightly at first, but he tightened his grip when Frank tried to move away. He let himself be led back to the bed, but he refused to step any closer to Gerard, despite the forceful tugs on his wrist. “Frank. Look at me.”
Frank really, really wanted to look anywhere but at Gerard, so he stared at the floor. His shame tightened his throat, and a telltale pressure was building behind his eyes. Fuck, if he cried right now, he really could never show his face again. The hand that Gerard wasn’t using to cage his wrist came up to Frank's throat, grazing it lightly before trailing up to his jaw. Gerard stayed gentle when he moved Frank’s head to look at him, but Frank could sense a stiffness to the movement, like he was holding something back. “Fuck, are you crying?”
He wanted to protest, to suggest that the notion was ridiculous, but Frank knew that if he spoke, the tremble he knew would be in his voice would betray him. He tried to pull his head away, wanting to hide his face from Gerard. The man kept such a firm grip on his jaw that moving would be impossible, so he kept his gaze low on Gerard's face, too ashamed to look in his eyes. As much as he tried to fight it, Frank could feel the first hot stream of tears streak down his cheeks.
“I’m so sorry, Gerard. I wasn’t- I didn’t mean to-” while Frank spoke- tried to untangle his thoughts and beg Gerard to forgive him- Gerard's thumb caressed his cheek; a smooth streak under his eye, wiping his tears. Frank was almost caught off guard by the tenderness of the gesture, but appreciative of it all the same. He tried to keep speaking, to stumble his way through his apology and make his escape, but the press of the pad of Gerard's thumb pushing past his lips cut off his words. He could taste the salt of his own tears, mixed with residual smoke. He inadvertently hummed around the appendage, both shocked and ridiculously turned on.
Gerard pulled his thumb out of Frank's mouth, dragged it down over his bottom lip, releasing it against his teeth, and ended his trail at Frank's chin, his hand still cupping his cheek.
Frank was dumbstruck by the whole thing; he had never been so thoroughly humiliated in his life, but he wasn’t sure he’d ever been this hard either. Frank finally looked into Gerard's eyes; the heat in his gaze surprised him, almost more so than him sticking a finger in his mouth. His pupils were so blown that his eyes looked black, and his breathing had gotten significantly harder. A wave of heat curled in Frank’s abdomen, he could feel his cock straining against his zipper, he was so hard that it was toeing the line of being painful. The air felt too thick. Gerard was so close to him. Frank was out of his mind.
“I’m not mad at you, Frankie.”
Frank was so relieved to hear that, that he was partially worried he would come in his pants, he was pretty positive he felt a bead of precum wet his underwear, and he bit back a moan. A fresh wave of tears pooled in his eyes, but he blinked them away, fought his lip from trembling. “You’re not?”
Gerard shook his head, trailed his hand back down Frank's neck, then slowly, slowly down his chest, until his hand rested above the waistband of his jeans. He moved his pinkie over the waistband, back and forth, almost dipping into Frank’s pants. Frank was trembling so hard he thought he might fall over, but he was afraid to move, to touch Gerard even if it was to brace himself from actually keeling over. He was afraid to break whatever spell had fallen over the room. He wanted to bolt out of the door; he wanted to see where this went. Mostly, he wanted Gerard.
“Really, really not mad. In fact, I think I should help you, Frankie, would you like that?” He sighed and sat on the edge of the bed in front of Frank.
Gerard’s voice was so soft it was almost demeaning. Frank's fear from earlier rushed back to him again, now that it seemed Gerard really was offering Frank something that they couldn’t go back from. At least Frank wouldn’t be able to, gone as he was already. This was a sobering thought, that Gerard wasn’t oblivious to Frank’s physical plight, but his emotional one. Suddenly, Frank thought this was all a very, very bad idea, and he backed away from Gerard. True to form, Gerard didn’t let him get very far.
He fisted the waistband of Frank's jeans; he missed his underwear by pure luck and dragged him back, even closer than before. Frank was standing between Gerard’s thighs. In this position, Gerard was eye level with Frank's abdomen, his face inches away from Frank’s dick, which really wasn’t helping his situation at all. “Gee-” Frank's voice was shaking. He knew he was close to begging, for what, he wasn’t sure. For Gerard to touch him? To give him some space to fucking think? Maybe to offer him something else that wasn’t just sex- he was almost afraid to even think about it, so sure that Gerard would be able to read how Frank really felt on his face. He thought it was basically impossible not to, that he always wore his heart on his sleeve, which surely couldn't be true if Gerard was still oblivious to his real feelings. Or maybe he was just ignoring them because he didn’t feel the same. Frank thought he had already scared Gerard off once tonight; he couldn’t imagine what a revelation like that would do. He didn’t want to confront it- couldn’t.
Gerard pressed his chin onto Frank's stomach, looked up at him with dark, hungry eyes, like he was going to devour him. “What’s the matter, honey? Don’t you want some help?” He dragged his fingers over Frank's thigh, so light it almost tickled, drawing a path upwards and gently grazing over Frank’s dick. Frank inhaled sharply, his body responding involuntarily- his hand shot up to grab at Gerard's shoulder, his hips jerked forward. For a moment, he was worried that he was done for, that Gerard's hand over his erection would be enough to send him over the edge. Gerard chuckled, almost mocking. His voice was light and airy, lilting in a way that bordered on hypnotic. Frank was sure he could feel the way his cock jumped under his hand.
"That's what I thought. Just let me help you, baby. I promise it’ll feel better than fucking your own hand.”
Frank almost outright moaned at that; the pet names alone were driving him insane, but he held on to his composure well enough to speak, “I don’t know, Gee. I don’t-”
Gerard's cold fingers were creeping under his shirt, leaving goosebumps in their wake. He trailed upwards until Frank’s shirt was bunched halfway up his chest. Frank shivered, the air chill against his bare skin. Gerard's nose brushed against Frank’s stomach; the heat of his breath, puffing against his skin, eased the chill and made him feel warm everywhere, giving him goosebumps for a different reason. Gerard brushed his lips over Frank's hip, licked over the swallows tattooed on his lower stomach. “I really like these, Frankie, so pretty.”
Frank keened, his hips chasing friction that wasn’t there. The only pressure he could really get was his dick straining against his pants, which wasn’t exactly comfortable, but it was something. With Gerard licking and kissing over his stomach, he was becoming increasingly desperate. He couldn’t remember why he thought this was a bad idea, why he had tried to hold off for so long. Fuck, if this was all Gerard could give him, maybe he should just take it.
Frank took his shirt the rest of the way off, tossed it into the chaos of Gerard’s room, possibly never to be seen again, not that he gave a shit; he’d steal clothes from Gerard if he had to, sniff them when he was alone and making himself come. Gerard looked up at Frank again and nipped at the skin of his hip, toyed with the button of his jeans. Frank hissed and grabbed at Gerard’s hair, more pawing at him than anything. He was feeling very overwhelmed and still very much high; everything Gerard did was that much more intense for it.
Gerard continued his ministrations on Frank, nosing through the trail of hair above his boxers and down to the outline of his erection. He mouthed at it, practically kissing it over Frank's pants. Frank could feel the heat of Gerard’s mouth through the layers of fabric, could see a dark spot forming from Gerard’s spit. His cock was throbbing; he needed Gerard’s mouth on him, but he didn’t want to ask for more than he was being given- afraid of pushing it too far. Gerard’s hands were everywhere, caressing up and down Frank's chest, his fingers lightly grazing his nipples, while his mouth gently nipped and kissed him. He was mapping him out with his hands, teeth, and tongue. He hoped Gerard would leave marks, bruises that would last for days, if not weeks.
Frank felt unsteady on his feet, lightheaded from the weed, and made worse by Gerard’s teasing. He was trying so hard to be patient, to see where Gerard would take this, but he felt so needy, his desperation leaning towards impatience. He hoped that Gerard would take pity on him soon, but he remembered what Gerard had said earlier- he could hear the echo of it even now- and figured that a little begging wouldn’t hurt. Just enough for Gerard to know he was ready for whatever he had planned, and he really would prefer to not jizz his pants. Frank grabbed at Gerard’s hair, lightly- but enough to grab his attention. He tangled the strands in his fingers, “Please, Gee. Please, please.”
Frank held Gerard’s head still in front of his zipper, grabbed at the hand on his chest, and dragged it down to the waistband of his jeans. Gerard stilled, Frank felt the ghost of a laugh tickle above his waistband. Gerard looked up and locked eyes with Frank, and he almost cowered. Even positioned like this, Frank standing above him and Gerard sat with his face in front of Frank’s clothed erection, it was clear that Frank was not in charge here. “‘Please, please, please,’ what Frankie? What do you want, pretty boy?”
“God, touch me- please- I don’t- anything. Please, anything. Just- god.” Frank felt out of his depth here, dizzy with lust and stupid high. He could barely think straight anymore- didn’t want to. He just wanted Gerard to give him something. Whatever he thought he deserved.
Gerard leaned back, moving one of his hands off Frank to lean back on the bed. Frank shuddered at the loss, feeling tense under Gerard’s scrutiny. “I think I know what you want, Frankie. You seemed so desperate for it earlier, humping my leg like that. Like a fucking dog.”
A wave of shame crashed over Frank at the reminder. A tiny whimper leaves his lips quicker than he can muffle it.
“Yeah, I think I know exactly what you need.” Gerard moves to lie on the bed, propping himself up against the headboard, legs spread, looking expectantly at Frank. He didn’t move, unsure of what Gerard wanted. They stared at each other for another moment, tension thick between them. Finally, Gerard broke the silence, the corners of his lips twitched upwards, and he patted his thigh. “Come up on my lap, puppy.”
Frank shuddered at the name, shocked and unsettled at how much it affected him- heat coursed down his spine. He was quick to follow Gerard's direction, stumbling a bit as he crawled over to him on the bed. When Frank reached him, Gerard guided their positioning until they were almost lying down, Frank on top of him and straddling his thigh. Gerard’s large hands spanned his hips and dug in. Frank prayed again for bruises, physical evidence of his time with Gerard. He hoped he’d be able to trace Gerard’s fingerprints in his skin, but for now, he was more than content to be this close to him, curled in close enough that they were breathing the same air.
The way they were tangled on the bed together was a more comfortable version of how they had fallen together earlier, when Frank had worried he had made a mess of things, but now he was seeing how much Gerard had liked it, could feel it now, too. The press of Gerard's erection helped ease his humiliation and spurred Frank on, now that he knew what Gerard wanted from him, how he could make up for earlier.
Frank buried his face in Gerard’s neck, nosed along his pulse point, and inhaled the musky sweet scent of him. He thought that if he weren’t as stoned as he was already, this would have gotten him there, breathing in Gerard, licking up his neck, hearing his soft groan for the first time when he gently bit down on a sweet spot behind his ear- better than anything a drug could do for him. He continued his path of kisses along Gerard’s jaw, then upwards, pulling back a bit just to look at him. He didn’t know if he would ever get another opportunity like this; he wanted to take advantage of what he could, now that he was allowing himself the indulgence.
Gerard’s eyes were so dark, pupils so blown they swallowed up the color. His gaze was so heavy on Frank, drinking him up just as much. A gentle flush was creeping high across his cheeks. Frank felt so endeared by it, by seeing Gerard like this. He couldn't help but lean down to press a light kiss right under his eye, where his blush had bloomed. Gerard tangled his fingers through Frank’s hair, grasping at the root, but still seemed content enough to let Frank have his way for a moment. He trailed light kisses down Gerard’s cheek, let their breaths mingle for a second too long, because it seemed that Gerard had finally lost his patience.
He tilted his face up to Frank and pressed their lips together, almost tenderly at first, but quickly the pressure of Gerard moving his lips against his had Frank opening his mouth against him. Gerard took advantage of this, licking over his lips and brushing against his tongue. The first wet touch had Frank groaning into Gerard's mouth, the heat of the kiss building quickly until it wasn’t much more than a sloppy exploration of each other's mouths. Gerard was biting at Frank's lip ring, tugged at it with his teeth. Frank was practically fucking into Gerard's mouth with his tongue, their teeth knocking together with the force of it.
Frank was reeling, overwhelmed by Gerard, the feeling of being crushed against his chest, the press of his dick against his thigh, and so hard himself it was a miracle he hadn’t passed out yet. The weed was still buzzing through him, clouding everything in a dizzying haze. The hand that wasn’t tangled in Frank’s hair gripped his hip again, guided him down until he felt that first sweet drag of his cock rubbing over Gerard’s thigh. The friction on his dick after it had been neglected for so long felt so good, so hot, that it had white spots dancing over his vision. He grunted and broke his kiss with Gerard, dizzy and lightheaded. Gerard was controlling the pace of Frank's hips, continuously fucking him down in a slow grind onto his thigh while biting at his neck and licking over any particularly harsh nips. Frank babbled between gasps and whines; he could have been saying anything. He felt out of control of himself, rutting into Gerard's thigh, digging his nails into his shoulders.
Gerard was squirming underneath Frank, careful not to disrupt his rhythm, but clearly chasing some relief himself. Frank adjusted, pushing upwards so he was dragging against Gerard’s cock through both of their jeans. Frank thought that this wasn’t entirely comfortable; he wanted to pull them both out of their pants and feel the heat of Gerard's dick on his own, feel the wet slide of skin against skin, but he was so fucking close, and just this side of too far gone to do anything but keep humping against Gerard.
Gerard brought his hand down onto Frank's ass, hitting it once before grabbing a fistful, pushing Frank harder against him. Frank’s dick twitched; he felt dirty getting off on grinding against Gerard like this, being treated this way. Ashamed of how much he liked it.
Gerard was groaning into Frank's ear, and the sound of his pleasure, the knowledge that Frank had something to do with it, and the fact that he’d been near to busting in his jeans half the night had a searing heat building in the base of his spine. His thrusts were getting off rhythm and sloppy; he was almost embarrassed that he was so close, just from rubbing over Gerard through layers of fabric, that maybe he was blowing his one chance with him- but he just couldn’t fucking help himself.
“Gee...” He hid his face in Gerard's neck, grabbed at his chest, his shoulder- feeling him through his clothes. The fabric felt damp against his bare chest, dragging against him almost uncomfortably.
“Gee- Gerard. I'm gonna- fuck.”
Gerard buried his hand in Frank's hair, pulled him up, so he was looking into Gerard's eyes, “I bet you look so pretty when you come, Frankie. I’ve always wondered. Show me. Let me see how pretty you are.”
That was all it took to have Frank gasping, frantically rutting his hips against Gerard until he stilled, spilling himself in his underwear. His eyes shut so tight that his vision was spotting, he wasn’t able to suck a full breath in until the full force of his orgasm was over.
He’s pretty sure that was the hardest he's ever come in his whole life. He was practically shaking against Gerard. He collapsed against him, hips twitching despite the building overstimulation from the friction of his jeans. He was still a little stiff despite the orgasm, and more than a little disgusted with himself. He felt his cum cooling in his clothes, sticky against skin and fabric. Gerard was still hard underneath him, and he moved to put a hand on his pants button, partially to return the favor, but mostly because he wanted to feel Gerard's cock in his hand, feel it stretch his mouth.
Gerard knocked Frank's hand away, and he whined petulantly.
“Gee, want to taste you. Please let me, wanna make you feel good.”
Gerard laughed at his neediness, moving Frank’s hand for a second time after he tried to undo his pants again. Frank felt almost insulted, but was trying to calm himself down, prepared to take it on the chin if Gerard kicked him out right now, with cum still cooling in his jeans. He was lying if he said the thought didn’t spear him in the chest. That the idea of leaving right now, of being unable to look Gerard in the eyes because he was too fucking ashamed, to never have him like this again, didn't kill him a little. But if that’s what he wanted, that's what he would do.
He didn’t spiral too far into his own thoughts before Gerard must have noticed the shift in his attitude. He grabbed Frank by the hips and flipped him over. He landed on Gerard's mattress with a grunt, Gerard hovering above him.
“Relax, honey. You’ll get what you want, okay? I’ll give you what you want.”
Gerard was murmuring into Frank’s neck, his hair tickling Frank's chin and chest. His hands were everywhere, pressing down on Frank, rubbing back and forth over his sides, his chest. Frank’s skin was sensitive to the touch, and he was keening, arching into the press of Gerard’s hands. He started a trail of open-mouthed kisses down Frank’s chest, so slow it was almost reverent. Frank’s head was spinning. Gerard teased his nipple with his tongue, darting over it before sucking it into his mouth. Frank let out a hoarse cry when Gerard brought it between his teeth, biting down gently.
Frank’s hand shot to Gerard's head, clumsily grasping at it. “Oh, my God.”
Frank was generally sensitive, but this felt much more intense—his feelings for Gerard, how he was handling him, combined with the fuzzy buzz of his high. Everything was just so much. He felt like he would burst out of his skin.
Gerard continued his path down, licking over his tattoos and pressing Frank's hips down onto the mattress when his squirming got to be too much. Frank was so focused on Gerard's tongue against his skin that he didn't notice him undoing his jeans and pulling them down over his ass until his cock sprang free and bounced up to his lower abdomen. He hissed at the relief, glad to be out of the soiled underwear, but embarrassed by the mess. Gerard didn't seem to care, though. He just pulled Frank's jeans the rest of the way off, then finally took off his own shirt.
Frank stared up at him, overcome with a ridiculous amount of thankfulness. Gerard was beautiful. His body was soft, stomach bunching a bit when he leaned over. His pale skin almost reflected in the dim light of the room, his blush creeping down his neck to his chest. Frank wanted to rake his fingernails down his back just to watch the blood rush beneath his skin. He felt kind of insane.
Gerard leaned down over Frank and palmed his semi-hard dick. His large hand wrapped around it easily, and he pumped once, twice, over the length of it, rubbing his thumb over his slit. He was wet enough that the glide was smooth if not a little sloppy. Frank was bunching the sheets in his fists, idly worried he would rip through them with his nails.
He could feel the heat of Gerard's breath over the base of his dick, felt the slight brush of his hair sweeping across the inside of his thighs. He squeezed his eyes shut. Gerard kissed his hip, the crease of his thigh, before dragging his tongue over Frank, licking a broad stripe from root to tip. Frank felt like his chest was collapsing, his breath was leaving him in ragged bursts, and Gerard hadn’t really even done anything yet. Gerard sucked the tip of Frank's cock into his mouth, hollowing his cheeks and circling it with his tongue. Frank choked on a gasp, tangling his hand into Gerard's hair- just to have something to hold onto. His eyes were still squeezed shut- he was sensitive from his last orgasm, aching from how hard he was already- Gerard hadn’t left enough time for him to fully soften anyway. Gerard took Frank out of his mouth. He felt the loss like a punch to his gut.
“Open your eyes, baby. Look at me.”
“Fuck.” Frank’s eyes shot open on a gasp. He was rewarded by the sight of Gerard's big eyes looking into his while he sank his mouth on his dick, almost to the base.
Frank tried to resist the urge to cant his hips up, to fuck into Gerard’s throat. He wanted so badly to be good for him, to be patient and pliant so that maybe Gerard would want to keep him around. But Gerard’s mouth felt so fucking good, the wet heat of it had him reeling, and fuck, he kept doing this thing with his tongue that was driving Frank insane. He involuntarily twitched his hips up, hitting the back of Gerard's throat with his dick; he could feel it flutter around the head when Gerard gagged from the surprise intrusion. Heat pooled in his abdomen, and he passed the point of no return quickly, feeling his balls draw up tight. He had just enough time to rip Gerard off of him before he was coming again, streaks of it painting Gerard's face and chest.
“Fuck! Fuck I’m sorry. I’m so sorry I tried not to-” Frank hiccuped, his eyes welling with tears again. He felt his dick flagging.
Gerard was looking down at Frank; his stare was intense, locking Frank in place so all he could do was watch. He stuck his tongue out, sweeping it over his lip where a stripe of Frank's cum hit him. He wiped the rest off with his fingers and brought them to Frank's lips. He opened his mouth, licking his own spend off Gerard's fingers, sucking them deep into his mouth and groaning at the taste. He was fucking humiliated, felt debased, and a little wild. Gerard brought his hand back, holding Frank’s jaw open by his teeth before pulling out altogether.
“That was rude of you, Frankie. I wasn't done yet. Not nearly.”
Frank's stomach dropped at Gerard's tone. He felt exposed, torn apart by his shame and Gerard’s eyes on him.
Frank's throat was constricting, “I know, Gerard. I’m sorry, I just-”
“Just an impatient whore, huh? You’re just a greedy little slut?” Gerard rubbed Frank’s thighs, the movement soothing despite his harsh words. Frank's cock jumped, and another wave of tears fell from his eyes, streaking into his hairline.
“God, fucking look at you. Just came and already desperate for another one, is that right?”
Frank whined and twisted his head away. He wasn’t sure what he wanted. He wanted punishment, forgiveness, to run and hide.
“Alright, Frankie. I’ll help you, you poor needy thing.”
Gerard moved down, settling himself between Frank's legs. Moved his hand under his thigh and lifted it over his shoulder. Frank shuddered; the new position had him feeling exposed in a new way, spread open for Gerard. His hole twitched when Gerard breathed against it, kissing it gently before moving upwards, mouthing over Frank’s balls, then up to his cock. Frank whined and jerked; he was overly sensitive. Even Gerard's breath ghosting over him felt a little painful; he was fraying at the edges. Gerard shushed him, rubbed a hand up his chest to play with Frank's nipple. He rolled it between his thumb and forefinger. Frank was writhing under Gerard, legs twitching around him. He wanted to shove him off, pull him closer. Fuck, Gerard was tearing him apart.
He watched Gerard bow his head and spit, right under his balls. He felt the warmth of it drip down to his asshole. Gerard spread his cheeks, watching it trail down over Frank. He rubbed small circles with his thumb in the crease of Frank's thigh. “Look at you. So messy for me, so pretty.”
Franked preened at the words, felt his dick leak a little bit. Gerard gently rubbed his fingers against Frank's rim. He gasped at the pressure, pushed into Gerard's fingers. Gerard pulled his hand back and slapped Frank’s thigh, a silent direction to hold still, before he leaned down and swallowed Frank into his throat. Frank shouted, both hands grabbing at Gerard's head, trying to push him off. His refractory period was nowhere near done, and the sudden stimulation felt white-hot and blinding. Gerard had one hand on Frank’s hip, holding him tight, while the other started prodding at his ass again. The mix of sensations had Frank's toes curling, his head swimming, and his body twitching on the bed, overwhelming and unsure of what it wanted. Tears were streaming down his cheeks; his hair felt wet with them. Through gasps and whines, he slurred out, “No- Gee, s’too much. Hurts- I can’t-”
Gerard pulled off his spent dick, but kept up the gentle rubbing and pressure at his asshole.
He looked up at Frank and shook his head, “It’s not too much. I know you can handle it, baby. You want to be good, right?”
Despite himself, he could feel his dick start to fluff up. He really did want to be good. He sniffled and nodded at Gerard, fucked out and dazed.
Gerard smirked up at him, cocky, slowly pumping his dick. Frank's thighs jerked every time he stroked the tip with his thumb, pressed onto his frenulum. “Use your words, honey. Is that what you want? To be good for me?”
“Fuck, yes. Yes, I want to be good. Please, I can do it. Please, Gee.” Frank barely recognized his own voice, high and reedy.
Gerard kissed his hip, smile warm with a familiar tenderness. “That’s a good boy. You’re gonna come for me one more time, okay? And then I’m gonna fuck that pretty whore mouth, just like you want.”
Frank nodded frantically, but Gerard wasn’t paying any attention. He was still slowly pumping over Frank's cock. He leaned down between his cheeks and licked a stripe over his asshole. Frank’s breath caught in his throat, and he pushed himself into Gerard's face. Gerard slapped his thigh again in warning, kissing sloppily over his hole. Frank was a mess, grasping at Gerard's hair, whining and bucking above him. Gerard wrapped an arm around Frank’s thigh, dragging him closer to his face. He was rutting his hips against the bed, groaning into Frank. Frank could feel the vibrations of Gerard's moans, felt the wet heat of his tongue pushing into his ass. Frank arched his back, looked down at Gerard, face pressed into him, his hand moving down to unbutton his jeans, watched as he shoved the hand that was just around Frank's dick into his pants to jerk himself.
The sight of Gerard losing himself like this, finally letting go of the restraint he’d been showing all night, had a wave of heat crashing over Frank, his hips pushing back into Gerard's tongue. He was fully hard again at this point. He wanted to bring a hand down to his tender dick, stroke himself while watching Gerard pleasure himself while eating Frank. He felt so fucking close already, the pressure of it drawing his balls up tight, but he wanted to be good. “Gerard, I’m so close. Can I-”
Gerard shook his head, “Not yet,”
Frank let out a frustrated groan. Gerard scoffed and continued eating him, pulling back when he thought Frank was getting too close. When Frank was wet and loose from Gerard's tongue, he pulled back, gently pushed a finger in, and fucked into Frank with it. The intrusion felt good, but Frank wanted more; he was out of his mind with it.
“Gerard- I can take more. I want more, please.” Frank knew he should be embarrassed with how needy and fucked-out he sounded, but right now, he was overcome with want and how badly he needed Gerard, to give a shit. Surprisingly, Gerard listened to Frank, finally taking pity on him. He indulged him with another finger and a kiss to the base of his dick. He scissored his fingers a bit, opening Frank up a little more before pushing a third finger in.
Frank keened, the stretch burned a little, and he focused on his breathing until it tipped into pleasure. Gerard spit into him again and kept pumping him with his fingers. He felt so full. Gerard's fingers were so long, so skilled. Frank was dripping onto his abdomen; he thought he could be in serious danger of coming untouched.
When Gerard curled his fingers into Frank's prostate, he shouted out, felt his eyes roll back, and he arched on the mattress. Gerard groaned at Frank's display and took him into his mouth again, sucking him wet and sloppy, moaning around him and fucking into his prostate with every thrust of his fingers. Frank was crawling out of his skin; his body felt so hot, his skin felt almost uncomfortable, and he was sobbing. Babbling and pleading to Gerard to just let him come, fuck, he’d been so good, please.
Gerard hummed his approval around Frank's dick, and his orgasm ripped through him. He was screaming, legs twitching, hole pulsing rapidly against Gerard's fingers. Frank felt like it would never stop, but Gerard fucked him through it, gently pushing his fingers in and out to keep milking Frank’s pleasure from him. Swallowed the cum that Frank had shot down his throat.
Frank was trembling, his chest heaving while he fought to catch his breath. Gerard took his mouth off of Frank with an obscene pop, lips glossy and swollen, and eased his fingers out of him. He surged up and grabbed Frank's jaw, wiped his tears, kissed his cheek, his forehead, his nose, before kissing him properly. Frank could taste himself on Gerard; he groaned into his mouth, feeling filthy and pleased, and claimed in some inexplicable way.
“That was so good, Frankie, so hot, fuck I’ll be jacking off to that forever probably. You did so well.” Gerard was holding Frank's head between his hands, smoothing his hair away from his face, “I think you deserve a treat now, what do you think?”
Frank was in a stupor. He felt like he was floating somewhere above himself, glowing in Gerard's praise, and eager to please him more, to taste him in his mouth and feel him in his throat. Gerard was kneeling above him. Frank pressed his head into Gerard's stomach, wrapped his arm around his hips, and hugged him, pulling him in close. Gerard brought his hand down to Frank's shoulders, rubbing up and down his back.
“You don’t have to do anything, Frankie. It’s okay.”
Frank shook his head, rubbing against Gerard's chest, and pressed a kiss to his stomach. “I want to, wanna make you feel good. Just wanted to hold you for a sec.”
Frank’s ears went hot at the statement. He knew he was clingy, especially after sex, and it was a lot for some people. He was worried it would be too much for Gerard- especially if this was supposed to be a casual hookup. But Gerard just held him, rubbing soothing patterns on his back until Frank started pressing open-mouth kisses over his stomach above the waistband of his underwear, where his fly was already open.
Gerard lifted his hands to Frank's shoulders, up to the sides of his neck, just holding him. Frank pulled Gerard's jeans down under his ass and nuzzled his hard cock through his briefs. He could feel the heat of it through the cloth, and could see the wet patch of precum Gerard had been leaking. Frank’s mouth watered at the sight, and he stuck out his tongue to taste it, licking over the head of Gerard's cock through his underwear. Gerard hissed between his teeth, moving his hands into Frank's hair. Frank kept kissing Gerard, slow and wet up and down his length. He sucked the tip over the cloth, pulling it into his mouth. He could taste Gerard, but just barely. He moved back to see the front of Gerard's underwear darkened with his spit. If Frank could get hard again, he would have.
Gerard's head was tipped back, neck taut, and exposed. His adam's apple bobbed on a swallow, and Frank clamored up to lick its path back down his throat. He kissed Gerad's neck, sucking bruises into the skin, nipping at the sensitive spot under his ear. Gerard grabbed Frank's jaw and dragged him up to his lips, sloppily fucking his tongue into his mouth. Frank returned the kiss with fervor. He trailed his hand down Gerard's chest, pushing into his underwear to wrap his hand around Gerard's cock. He feels heavy and hot in his palm, and when he starts to pump him, the glide is wet. It’s the only sound in the room besides Gerard's breathy moans in Frank's ear. He can feel the vibrations of the sound through Gerard’s neck, where he’s tucked his face, breathing him in and pressing light kisses while he jerks him.
Gerard groans when Frank bites down where his neck meets his shoulder. Gerard jerks his hips into Frank's hand, and he can feel the way his dick jumps up.
“Thought you wanted to suck me?” Gerard’s words are slurred, his hand digging into Frank's side, the other cupping his neck. He knew his words were more a demand than a question. Frank nods, whimpering into Gerard's throat. He lets Gerard pull him away, watches him crawl off the bed to pull the rest of his clothing off, and Gerard is fully bare in front of him. Frank drinks him in, watches his thighs flex as he moves. Gerard stands in front of Frank, squeezing the base of his dick.
“C’mere, Frankie. On your knees.” His tone is saccharine, but the look he gives Frank is anything but. Frank is quick to follow his directions. Moving off the bed until he drops to his knees in front of Gerard, landing with a soft thud. His cock is thick and veiny, flushed dark, and dripping in front of him. So heavy it bobs in Frank's face when Gerard adjusts, bringing a hand to Frank's hair and tangling his fingers in the strands, pulling lightly. Frank is practically drooling, opening for Gerard before he starts to pull Frank to him. Frank gets his mouth around him quickly, already feeling stretched by just the tip in his mouth. He flicks his tongue over Gerard's head, savoring the heady salty taste of him. He groans and drinks him down, bobbing him further into his throat and swallowing around him. Gerard is grunting above him, staring down at Frank, his hands tangled in his hair.
“So good. You’re doing so well, Frankie. You can take more, right? Wanna be good and take me?”
Heat zipped down Frank’s spine, settled fluttery in his stomach. He pulled off of Gerard, a strand of spit hanging between them. His voice was already hoarse when he spoke, “Fuck, yes. I can take it. Use my throat, please, wanna feel you.”
“Good puppy.” Gerard brings Frank back to his cock, pushes his dick into his mouth. Frank opens his throat more, anticipating Gerard to fuck into him quickly, but he eases into him, pulls out, and pushes back in inch by inch like he's opening his ass instead of his throat. Frank's eyes flutter shut, and he moans around Gerard, finally feeling him hit the back of his throat. He chokes lightly but doesn’t let Gerard pull out, gripping his hips and pushing his head further until his nose is pressed into Gerard's pubes. He held himself there until he was really gagging, choking on spit and a lack of oxygen. He pulled off of Gerard and drooled over him, catching his breath while he jerked him. Gerard was petting Frank’s hair, whispering praises, calling him perfect, so good, so pretty, and Frank was glowing with it. He’d been complimented before, sure, but no one had ever made him feel like Gerard did. No one put fucking butterflies in his gut like Gerard did when he swiped his thumb over his swollen lip, spread the wetness around. “My sweet, messy boy.”
Frank takes him back into his mouth and splays his hands over Gerard's thighs. Gerard starts fucking into his mouth in earnest, holding Frank still while he pumps his hips, pushing his cock deep into his throat. Frank chokes a bit on every thrust, hot tears spilling from his eyes. Gerard catches them with his thumbs. “Goddamn, baby. You’re so pretty, choking me down. Fucking crying on my cock. Next time, I’m gonna fuck you proper.” Gerard was panting, “ Look at me.”
. Frank could tell Gerard was close by the way his stomach was tensing up, the slight twitches on his tongue. He felt even thicker in his mouth, steadily leaking precome. His jaw was sore from the way Gerard was using him, like he was a fuck toy. But still, Gerard had said next time. Frank was beside himself. He wanted to be logical. Gerard was probably still a bit buzzed, and people said a lot of shit when they were on the edge like this. Frank didn’t want to get his hopes up, but he felt jittery with it. Next time.
His eyes rolled up; he could barely make out Gerard through the cloud of tears in his eyes. He blinked, sending another stream of tears down his cheeks so he could watch Gerard come with clearer vision. He was sure he was quite a sight, drooling on Gerard's dick, eyes glassy and fucked out. Gerard must’ve agreed, hips stuttering into Frank’s throat when their eyes locked. Frank's only warning from Gerard was a ground-out order, “Don't swallow yet.”
Frank was able to close the back of his throat and pull back a little bit before Gerard stilled, and spilled into his mouth. Gerard looked crazed when he came, eyes pinched and wild, teeth clenched, and letting out punched out breaths, between low mewls. It was probably the most beautiful thing Frank had ever seen, and he thanked God that he’d have this memory to jerk off to for the rest of his life, if nothing else.
Frank held Gerard in his mouth while he came, not doing anything, just letting him rest against his tongue, lightly drag himself over it while he rode out his orgasm. When it was over, and he pulled out, Frank held the pool of Gerard's come in his mouth, listening to his instruction, unsure of what was next. Gerard leaned down to be eye-level with Frank, caressed his cheek, gripped his jaw, and told him, “Open.”
Frank did, sticking out his tongue a little, careful not to spill a drop. Gerard was flushed, cheeks bright, and eyes wild. He let out a hoarse curse and spit into Frank's open mouth. Told him to swallow, which Frank did happily. He opened his empty mouth to show Gerard, his hands tightened against his jaw, and he kissed him. Not as heated as before, but still intense. The kiss slowed until it wasn’t much more than their lips brushing, breathing into each other.
“You okay? I know that that was a little much.”
Frank wanted nothing more than to wrap himself around Gerard. Latch onto him, crawl into his skin maybe, but Gerard’s question made him feel a little insecure, and now that everything was said and done, he was unsure where they stood. He felt a bit uneasy. Gerard rubbing a hand along his arm helped a little.
Frank sighed. “Yeah, I’m okay. Did you- I really liked it, but uh.” He wasn’t sure how to phrase what he wanted to say- how much he wanted Gerard to know. He wanted all of Gerard, not just this. He was fooling himself earlier, that he could’ve thought any different. He knew that if Gerard didn’t feel the same, it would gut him- and he was worried that Gerard wouldn't want to be around him anymore if he knew. Gerard was gazing at him, eyes soft, but there was a crease in his brow, as if he was just as worried about what Frank would say as he was.
Frank realized that they were still naked and felt a little too vulnerable and exposed suddenly. He got up to find his briefs, pulled them on with his back to Gerard. He heard Gerard get up to do the same, but even knowing he was covered, he couldn’t bring himself to look at him. He felt a little torn open- scared that this would be it, all Gerard wanted him for. He wanted to ask what he meant by “next time,” but was embarrassed to read too much into it and was simultaneously afraid of the answer.
He could sense Gerard behind him, but he was hovering, like he didn’t want to spook Frank.
“Frankie? Are you okay? You seem…” Gerard exhaled heavily, as if he were being weighed down. “Did I fuck up?”
The question startled Frank so much that he spun to look at him. Gerard had sat back down on the bed, eyes downcast. He was biting at his lip, playing with a loose string on his comforter. The room reeked of weed and sex.
“What?”
Gerard wouldn’t look at him, “I know that I can be… a lot or too intense or whatever.” He was waving his hand in the air, like he could expel his nerves through the movement. “I should have talked more with you about this, maybe? Or, I don’t know, not jumped on you the way that I did, and we’re both pretty fucked up, so maybe it was irresponsible of me. I just-.” He sighed, rubbed a hand over his eyes, and finally looked up at Frank, “I just really fucking like you, Frankie. And I’m sorry if I did this wrong.”
Frank felt like fireworks were going off in his chest. He barely stopped himself from collapsing onto the floor. He didn’t know what to say to Gerard, what words would be sufficient for what he was feeling, so he walked over to him. Kissed his forehead, his mouth, whispered against it, “I really fucking like you too, Gee.”
Gerard pulled back, beaming up at Frank. “Will you stay here tonight?”
Frank would stay for as long as Gerard could put up with him. He nodded, kissed him one more time, just because he could, and crawled into bed with him.