Chapter Text
Liz isn't sure what startles her awake as she sits up in bed, eyes scanning the darkness, and her hand instinctively reaches out for her service weapon before she pulls back, remembering it is long gone. She listens for whatever it was that woke her but hears only the sound of her own breathing. It was nothing. Go back to sleep. Her heart is racing though, and she knows from experience sleep won't be easily reclaimed.
She slides silently from the bed and reaches the door in the darkness without need of light. The path is well known to her after sleepless nights spent pacing the beautifully decorated room that has become her prison. Nights when the tears came and refused to leave. When the anger and hatred she felt for her captor burned within. Sixteen paces to the right and fourteen to the left. She's made the journey a thousand times. Back and forth. Back and forth, wading through a sea of regret for the hurt she caused him. Trying to breathe as the need for her baby consumed her.
The door is locked of course but she tries it just the same and fights the urge to bang her fists on the solid mahogany in frustration. It does no good, as she is well aware, and will only earn her threats of sedation. Threats her captor made good on and so she silently listens at the door, careful not to alert the guard stationed outside.
It was nothing. Go back to sleep.
Except it is something. Liz can feel it in the prickling at the back of her neck as she tries to control her breathing. That indescribable feeling in her chest can only mean one thing.
He's here.
She knows it with certainty now even though there is no sign of disturbance in the house. Every time her poor body has given way to exhaustion, falling into a fitful sleep, the dreams come and the terror along with it. Darkness and long empty hallways with locked doors shut to her frantic hands. Searching for her daughter. Searching for the face that was the last she saw before she died. Her growing despair as both are lost to her and the sensation of falling through the emptiness of her shattered life. A succession of tortured dreams with the same conclusion as finally a pair of strong arms surrounds her, holding tight. Instinctively, she knows it's him. Knows he has found her beyond the grave and will pull her back to life. I've got you.
Every night the same. The fleeting moment of safety in his arms and the whispered assurance before she is jolted awake within the empty room. The prickling at her neck and the feeling in her chest she can't quite put into words the only remnants of the dream. And so she walks the room, waiting for daylight, wondering if she will ever have the chance to fix what she has broken as the guilt hangs over her like a banner. This is your doing. You've brought yourself to this locked room.
Liz stands at the door, unsure what her next move should be. Every instinct in her body tells her this is the moment she has waited for even as the house remains silent and still. Perhaps it's her imagination after all and the weeks of stress and exhaustion are catching up. Wanting him to come for her and Agnes so desperately she is hearing things that aren't there. Willing it to be so.
She blinks back tears as the doubt replaces the certainty she felt only moments ago and is taking a step toward the bed when she hears it. The muffled shot of a gun and silencer. The hysteria rises in an instant and she bites down on her lip fearful of making a sound. Keep it together Liz.
The thought of Kirk or his people coming for her before Red can reach her has Liz springing into silent action. She moves quickly to the bedside table to unplug the lamp. Feeling the weight of it in her hands, she hopes it will suffice as a weapon if need be. There is a soft thud in the hall and she spins around to listen but again all is silent until she hears the key insert into the lock, and she just makes it back to the door before the knob begins to turn. Still unsure who is on the other side she retreats behind, takes a breath in and waits with the lamp poised at the ready.
Light from the hallway floods the room as the unknown intruder enters and immediately approaches the bed. Struggling to see as her eyes adjust to the brightness, Liz steps from behind the door and hears him say, "Elizabeth, you're not planning on bashing me in the head with that lamp, are you?"
Raymond
The voice from her dreams and she feels it reach into her very soul. He must have seen her shadow as his senses are always tuned into the dangers around every corner. She wonders in that fleeting second if they'll laugh about this one day. The absurdity of the moment as she stands there in her nightgown, clutching the lamp like a batter waiting for the next pitch.
Red turns to see her standing in the light from the hall. Watches as the lamp falls limply to her side and there are no words as he drinks her in, her beautiful face staring back at him. He takes in everything at once. The shadows beneath her eyes, the exhaustion evident in her too thin frame, and she has never looked more beautiful until that moment.
Elizabeth
His Elizabeth. Red hasn't allowed himself to contemplate this reunion to any degree. There was simply too much to do. Too many clues to track down and informants to find as he sorted through Kirk's strange and twisted organization until he found this hidden compound. Hadn't allowed himself to feel anything really except the desperation to find her. What would follow he did not know and for Raymond Reddington, the man always ten steps ahead, the uncertainty of that was unbearable at times. Right then he feels certain he can withstand anything to come with this memory of seeing her alive once more.
How long they stand there watching and waiting they will never recall, but a lifetime passes in their features. The pain and fear and betrayal hang heavy between them as if they are a tangible thing. Another locked door to be broken down.
He won't advance first this time, and Lizzy would not want him to. Her choices have led them to this place and she wants to, needs to make the first step towards recovery. All the words she had planned to say die in her throat as she looks at the face she has searched for in her dreams. There is kindness and relief mixed with a sadness she has never seen, even in their lowest moments. Oh but there's the look in his eyes she recognizes instantly. He loves her still. After all that has happened it remains unbroken, and there are no words. She realizes then how pitiful they would sound. How to begin to explain what she now finds unfathomable or make amends for the unforgivable? Perhaps there will be a chance for that later, she thinks, but for now this will have to do as the feeling in her chest pulls her forward.
Raymond, I do love...
Red watches as she steps toward him, lamp still in hand, and just as she reaches the bed where he stands, tosses it to the side and grabs him with such force he stumbles back a step or two.
As her arms circle around his torso, she buries her head in his shoulder and he remembers another embrace shared on a deserted street the night of her release from jail. When suddenly everything seemed right before they went so horribly wrong.
The gun is tossed on the bed next to the lamp as he enfolds her in his arms. He has taken care of the guard at her door, but he is listening for any movement from the hallway. Baz is to rendezvous with them shortly and they will make a carefully planned exit from the house leaving behind a small army to deal with those that remain, offering surrender first and a bullet second.
For now and for a few seconds this is what she needs. To know there is an end coming for the ordeal she has endured. To know that soon Kirk will never be in the position to hurt her or her child ever again. And he needs this, too. To have the one he once thought lost to him forever there in his arm, alive and unhurt. At least physically because Red can feel how thin she is and he fights to control his anger for the man responsible. God knows what mental anguish she has gone through and only time will tell how much healing she will truly need.
He hears her speak for the first time but can't catch her words as her face remains buried in his chest.
"I can't understand you. Talk to me."
"Agnes. We need to find my baby."
Of all the things he has imagined her saying, this was the last. Is it possible Kirk could be so cruel as to...
"Lizzy, don't you know? I thought he would have told you...but of course he wouldn't, the selfish bastard."
He stops then, pulls back, and as her eyes meet his own, continues, "Elizabeth, Agnes is safe. She has been in my care for weeks. Kirk was holding her at a separate compound and I found her first. Do you understand? Agnes has been with me and she is fine. You will see her today. I promise you, before this day is over you will have your baby with you again."
Liz has listened to it all without speaking, without fully comprehending the words. Agnes safe? The daily threats and/or promises regarding her baby were all lies. A manipulation by her captor in whatever sick game he was playing. A way to keep her under control by using a mother's love for her child against her. If he were standing there right then Liz feels certain she'd take Red's gun and finish what Kirk had started.
Red is waiting for some reaction to his words and watches her with growing alarm as she stares blankly back at him.
"Elizabeth?"
"Raymond, I..."
Her legs give way then and she'd have fallen to the floor but feels his arms scooping her up and holding tight. The dreams come back to her and the sensation of falling into nothingness but for this man who always catches her. How it is possible Agnes has already been found, she can't quite understand. Her baby is safe and far away from this hateful place and under Red's protection. As she should have been all along.
Red places her gently on the bed so that she is sitting at the edge. He senses she's reaching the breaking point, but they're not out of danger and soon it will be time to move.
"I'll explain everything later but right now we need to get you out of here. You can do this, Elizabeth. Agnes is waiting for you so it's time to go. Do you understand?"
She finds her voice then. Agnes is waiting. Her baby is safe and she needs to get to her.
"Yes I understand. I'm ready."
Red moves through the room using the light from the hall to guide him, and he's soon back with her clothes urging her to change as quickly as possible. She smiles as he turns giving her as much privacy as possible. Always a gentleman even during a prison break, but she's so exhausted and focused on getting the hell out of there, if Red's army of commandos descended on her room right then she'd hardly bat an eye.
"Okay, I'm ready," she says again as she pulls on a hoodie to protect her against the chill in the air.
He turns and kneels to help her with her shoes and it's then Baz appears at the bedroom door.
"Chopper ETA four minutes. Aram radio'd saying he can't scramble the alarm system much longer so our presence will soon be known. Time to move."
"Right. Hold them off as long as possible till I get her to the roof then tear this place apart and find him. Let me know when you have him."
Baz moves out of sight and Liz wishes there was time to thank him for tonight and also for that day at the chapel, but it will have to wait. Suddenly she feels the weight of all the things she should have said and done pressing down on her and she won't be able to take a step without Red knowing. Just in case and no matter the outcome, he will at least know a tiny fraction of what she feels inside. He is still kneeling in front of her, and she reaches out to take his arm.
"Raymond—"
"Lizzy, it's time to go."
"I wanted it to be you."
"I don't—"
"I needed you to find me and my baby, but I also wanted it to be you. I'm more sorry than you will ever know but I'm glad it's you."
She sees him swallow and he rises in front of her ready to help her to her feet. "I will always be here Elizabeth."
He helps her up, making sure her strength has returned. As his arm slides around her waist and they turn to exit the bedroom, she hears him whisper, "I've got you."
Lizzy closes her eyes as that feeling returns in her chest, only this time she knows exactly what it is.
Raymond, I do love...
Words spoken in a previous life and as true as they are, she now realizes more than love, it is a longing that she feels. A longing for that connection to him she once believed needed to be broken only to find herself bereft without it. Her heart knew even when her mind did not.
"I know you do," and she gives him a smile as they race for the roof.