Chapter Text
Theo was nervous.
His fingers drummed insistently on the steering wheel as he focused on keeping his heartbeat steady.
He'd only been out of Liam's house for five minutes, and he already regretted whatever had brought him there.
He should have said no to Scott, he should have told him he'd rather go patrolling with Malia or Peter: Scott wouldn't even ask for explanations.
But on the other hand...
On the other hand, he hadn't seen Liam in months, since the day they'd broken up. He hadn't spoken to Liam since then, and the chance to see him again, even just to see how easy it had been for him to move on, had seemed indispensable.
Now, standing outside his house, not even knowing if he'd show up, it no longer seemed like a good idea.
They'd broken up. It was over between them. What was the point of seeing each other? It would only hurt more.
But just as he'd almost decided to put his foot back on the accelerator and simply leave, the front door opened, and a moment later, Liam was there, on the porch, watching him.
Theo forced himself to keep breathing.
It was just a patrol, a few hours and it would all be over, he could do this.
Liam meanwhile walk down the driveway like a man condemned to death, the smell of nervousness hitting him well before the beta got into the car, closing the door and keeping his gaze fixed straight ahead.
He looked the same, yet so different. He looked older, his hair had grown a little, enough to caress the back of his neck, and the freckles that had colored his cheeks all summer were nowhere to be seen.
Theo didn't miss the faint signs of dark circles under his eyes. He looked so tired.
"Hey" the beta greeted him first, turning to look at him.
"Hey" Theo replied, trying to focus only on driving the car.
"How are you?" Liam asked, his tone tense and so strange.
"Fine," Theo replied almost in the same tone, his fingers closed on the steering wheel "you?"
"Fine."
After that, there was other silence, so uncomfortable that Theo considered for a few seconds taking Liam home and making up something with Scott.
How could he have been so stupid as to accept?
Liam continued to fidget in his seat, as if he couldn't keep still, the seat belt feeling like a useless restriction of his energy.
Theo had never felt worse in his life, with Liam so close and yet so far away.
"We have to go to the reserve," the beta finally said, desperate to fill the silence.
"Yes," Theo confirmed calmly
"Scott thinks there are hunters around," Liam informed him again, as if he truly thought Theo knew nothing.
"I know," Theo replied, unsure whether to hate the strange conversation or the suffocating silence more.
Luckily, it only took Liam another three minutes of discomfort before he found the best solution.
"Can I put on some music?" the beta asked, a little insecure.
Theo's heart sank; Liam had never asked his permission to do anything in that car.
The space between them seemed to become a chasm.
"Yes," he replied, struggling to keep every single function of his body under control "the aux cable is in there."
Untouched since the last time you were in here. Maybe it was better not to tell him that.
Liam slowly opened the glove compartment, searching for the aux cable before finding something else.
"Oh"
A sound that escaped his lips like a gasp.
Theo instinctively turned his head toward Liam's hands, searching for the source of his surprise, a familiar yellow package that seemed to make the blood drain from his face.
Shit.
"What is it?" he asked, trying to sound casual even though he was pretty sure he turned pale.
"You still have them?" Liam asked, reaching into the package only to find two chocolate bars still perfectly wrapped.
"You never finished them," Theo replied with a shrug.
Liar.
"You could have thrown them away," Liam replied, obviously, holding the box in his hands as if it were some kind of proof.
Of course he could. He wanted to. But he couldn't. That was the last thing he had left of him and Liam, and he couldn't... he couldn't just throw it away like it was nothing.
"I'll do it," Theo then interrupted, just to change the subject, "but take one if you want it, I don't think they're expired.”
Liam loved those bars. Theo had started buying them for him so he'd have something to eat after practice, when he'd go pick him up, and then it became just another way to show him his love.
And now it seemed just like another sign of something broken beyond repair.
"No, thanks," Liam replied, before putting the box away like some kind of relic "I'm fine."
Fine. Fine with us. Fine without you.
Theo had to fight every inch of his body not to show the desperation gripping him.
Two minutes later, Liam's playlist was playing quietly in the car, not a sound leaving Liam's mouth even though he usually sang along.
Theo forced himself to breathe.
Just a few more hours and it would all be over.
Suddenly, a few hours seemed like an eternity.
It took about another 30 minutes to reach the reserve, and when they got there, it was as spooky as ever, the cold air hitting them the moment they got out of the car.
"What should we do now?" Theo asked, stuffing his already cold hands into his pockets.
"I think we should walk around, see if we find anything strange or unusual" Liam replied simply.
Theo nodded, shrugging. "So, let's go, which way?"
"This way," Liam replied, pointing to the path to the left "you know, I've gotten better at tracking."
Theo thought about how many times he'd teased him about his werewolf incompetence.
"Good," he forced himself to remain neutral, biting the inside of his cheek "It'll be useful now"
If Liam wanted to reply, he didn't get the chance because Theo had already set off down the path, trying to stay a few steps ahead of him.
The beta followed without protest, keeping his distance.
Theo wasn't sure what they were looking for, but all he could do was pretend to be calm while Liam, between his heartbeat, his chemosignals, and that something that always seemed to vibrate under his skin, tried to drive him crazy.
After that, he would delete Scott's number from his phone.
The silence between them lasted for a mile at most before Liam's restlessness translated into words.
"There's no reason why we shouldn't be friends."
Theo couldn't do anything to hide his slight shock.
"What?"
"Friends," Liam repeated, still behind him "there's no reason why we shouldn't be friends.”
Theo could name at least ten just right now.
But somehow he had to survive the evening without destroying whatever progress he'd made in the past few months about him.
"Yeah," he replied, his jaw tense "Sure, friends."
Theo had no idea how to be his friend.
Luckily, Liam seemed much less disillusioned than he was.
"So... how's work going?" the beta attempted, proactively, the only sound being the dry leaves crunching under their feet "is Gary still unbearable?"
"I don't work at the minimarket anymore," Theo replied, continuing to walk a few steps ahead of him.
"Oh."
Yeah, oh.
Theo hated that his life had gone on without Liam. He hated that Liam no longer knew everything about him.
"Yes, Scott..." he began, then waved a hand in the air, it didn't matter anyway "I work at the clinic with Deaton now."
"Wow, okay," Liam replied, clearly taken aback. "Yeah, you... you like animals. Do you like it there?"
"Yes," Theo replied laconically, careful to step over a root without tripping, the reserve quiet amid their tension.
"Good," Liam said back, finally realizing he had no desire to chat.
It was just a mission, and then they wouldn't see each other again for another six months, no reason to torture himself more than necessary.
Theo was trying to suppress the stupid anguish that swelled in his chest at the thought when the silence of the woods was interrupted by a text notification.
Really? The phone? While they were looking for hunters?
"Scott?" he found himself asking, however, as Liam checked the text.
"No," he shook his head, typing a quick reply before putting his phone back in his pocket "just Brett."
"Oh," it was Theo's turn to be surprised, a dull ache spreading throughout his body.
"He just wanted to know if I..." Liam tried to explain before giving up "it doesn't matter."
"if you were busy?"
Theo hated feeling so pathetic.
But Liam stopped walking, forcing him to turn around only to see the beta with a questioning expression plastered across his face.
Theo swallowed the lump in his throat, hoping he could keep his voice steady.
"I heard you guys see each other a lot," he let out, trying to sound detached "are you... dating him?"
The prospect was enough to break his heart all over again.
"No! No, nothing like that" Liam immediately shook his head, perhaps a little too forcefully "no, we... it's just sex."
Theo thought he was going to throw up.
Instead, he managed to turn around, starting to walk again, forcing himself to keep breathing normally.
"Just sex," he repeated, the words acidic on his tongue.
It was a statement. A question. Also a death sentence.
"Yes," Liam confirmed, now a little defensive "he calms me down when I'm nervous about a game or... something else."
Something else.
Theo didn't even know what to say.
Liam obviously took that the wrong way.
"What?" He then asked, grabbing him by the arm and forcing him to look at him “are you judging me?”
Theo wasn’t judging him. Theo just wanted to get his mind off of Liam and Brett entwined together in his bed
“No,” he shook his head, his jaw tense as jealousy consumed him “no, you can do whatever you want”
And it was true. Liam could do whatever he wanted. That didn’t mean he couldn’t be hurt or… or annoyed about it.
“He’s nice to me,” Liam insisted, his gaze hard “and he cares,” he then emphasized “we’ve worked through our problems. Sex is just… something extra.”
Theo wasn’t sure why Liam was trying to justify himself.
“It’s okay, Liam, I get it,” he repeated apathetically, finally removing his arm from Liam’s grasp “it doesn’t concern me anyway.”
It doesn’t concern me. It doesn’t concern me.
He’d always been so good at believing his own lies, why couldn’t he now?
"And you?" Liam stopped him before he could turn and start walking again.
"Me what?"
"Are you... seeing someone?"
Theo had to physically stop himself from laughing hysterically.
"Is it important?" he asked instead, unable to completely hide his shock.
"It's just for conversation," Liam shrugged.
Theo felt his heart skip a beat.
Liar.
"No, I’m not seeing anyone," he replied, feeling somehow compelled to reassure him.
And it was the truth.
"Really?" Liam asked suspiciously, starting to walk again, this time beside him.
"Is it that weird?" Theo asked, shoving his hands in his pockets.
"Yes," Liam replied, too direct as always, earning a questioning look.
"Well, I mean you are… you," the beta explained, shrugging.
Theo almost felt compelled to point out that this was a problem, not a quality, but in the end he decided it wasn't necessary: Liam shouldn't know everything anymore.
"Yeah," he just replied in a dismissive tone.
And then another silence.
Long, tense, awkward.
Theo hated that time stretched between them as if they were strangers.
"Do you hear anything?" Liam asked after a while, back behind him.
Theo was almost certain there was no sound and that Liam had only said it to break the silence.
"No," he merely replied, "no, maybe Scott was wro—"
"Theo," Liam's voice interrupted him.
Theo immediately realized he could no longer hear the rustling of leaves behind him and he turned around.
The image came to him in pieces: there was Liam, completely paralyzed, his eyes wide and his arms outstretched for balance, his foot on what was unmistakably a trap.
How was that possible? He had stepped there a second before.
"Theo..." Liam repeated, his voice tense as he urged him to do something.
"Okay, just... don't move," Theo said at that point, slowly approaching him, "and don't lift your foot"
"Theo, please" Liam replied, frightened, his heart pounding.
"Stay still, you're fine," Theo said at that point, crouching down to get a better look at the mechanism under the beta's foot "we just need to figure out how to disarm it."
"What is it?" Liam asked, pressing his foot as hard as he could against the ground.
"I don't know," Theo replied, circling him, trying to understand without letting his concern show "it doesn't look like a trap, it looks like a button."
"You mean it's a bomb?" Liam asked again, his eyes wide, the smell of anxiety making his head spin.
"No, if it were, it would have blown up when you stepped on it," he then limited himself to answering, looking around the clearing "it's probably connected to some arrows or maybe a net."
He didn't understand; it didn't look like a trap like the ones they'd already seen, and the fact that Liam was trapped inside didn't help his clarity.
The good thing was that there were probably more around to figure out what they were.
"Stay here," he said simply, standing up and heading towards the trees, managing only a few steps before a hand grabbed him by the wrist.
"No!" Liam only exclaimed, yanking him back, nearly losing his balance himself.
"Liam, I have to..."
"Don't even try to leave me here," the beta growled in response, his heartbeat quickening as the fangs pricked his lips.
Theo felt irritation well up inside him, along with the scent of Liam's anger.
"Don't be hysterical," he snapped, ripping his wrist from his grasp, the contact burning like fire "we don't need this now."
"Theo," Liam growled again, low and threatening.
Theo didn't know how to help him if he just stood there.
"Just let m—"
"I know we broke up and you hate me, but don't you dare leave, Theo," Liam interrupted again, his voice distorted by the fangs as the claws punctured his palms.
We broke up.
Theo felt his heart tighten.
But hate him? He just couldn't.
"I don't hate you" he felt compelled to say for some reason and he sounded so exhausted.
But Liam didn't even seem to hear him, too focused on keeping his anger at bay, the growls growing louder and louder.
Theo felt stupid. Breaking up with him didn't mean he stopped knowing him. He knew Liam, he understood him, he knew how to fix all this.
"Okay, Liam, if you get angry, we'll lose control of this situation," he then tried to speak to him, stepping in front of him again. "we don't want that to happen while your foot's in there, right?"
All he got in response was another growl.
"Do you remember what I told you about fear?" he then tried again, taking his hand, forcing his fingers to open "you get angry when you're scared, that's okay, you don’t have to, I won't let anything happen to you" he then reassured him, pressing his palm against Liam’s, trying to stop the bleeding "tell me three things that can't be hidden.”
"The sun, the moon, the truth," Liam replied through his fangs.
Good. At least he was still answering him.
"Okay," Theo encouraged "okay, can you say it again?"
"The sun, the moon, the truth," the beta repeated again, more clearly, his hand now firmly wrapped around Theo’s.
"The sun, the moon, the truth," he then began to repeat himself, over and over and over again, their hands swinging slightly.
Theo didn't let go until he was sure Liam was back to himself.
Theo actually didn't want to let go of him ever again.
"Okay?" he asked instead when his heartbeat seemed normal again.
"Okay," Liam nodded, letting go of his hand, the faint scent of embarrassment filling the air around them.
Theo ignored it.
"I'm not leaving you here, okay?" he reassured him instead with a little smile "I just want to find another trap and figure out how it works."
"What if there isn't another one?" Liam asked anxiously "or what if there is another one and you fall into it?"
"I'll find it without falling into it," Theo replied with a smile "but I'll stay within earshot, you just focus on my heartbeat."
That finally seemed to convince him.
"Okay," he nodded, taking a deep breath "okay, I can do it"
"Good," Theo replied, giving him a final nod before turning back "don't move."
Besides, where was he supposed to go if he couldn't lift his foot?
Theo walked away, down the path, trying to walk as straight as possible while holding Liam's heartbeat like a string.
And when he was far enough away that it had faded a little, he turned and began walking in circles, scanning the area for another trap.
He was about halfway through the spiral he was drawing toward Liam when his nose caught sight of something: metal, steel, and plastic.
Theo stopped immediately, looking around, trying to trace the scent as precisely as possible, arriving right at the edge of the path.
Found it.
It was almost completely covered by leaves and a few pebbles, and Theo would surely have stepped on it if he hadn't been actively searching it, but now there it was, small and black.
Now he just had to trigger it, trying not to die in the process.
He started looking for something to throw at it, a stick, maybe a rock, anything heavy enough to trigger it.
He circled for a while, careful to make sure there were no others, but eventually he found a rock that looked good.
It took a couple of tries, but he finally managed to roll it straight enough to hit the trap.
A moment later, he was forced to literally throw himself to the ground as at least 20 arrows lodged in various spots on the ground, forming a streak along all possible escape routes, with the trap in the center.
Fantastic. Truly fantastic.
Once he was sure there was nothing else, Theo got up from the ground, trying to dust himself off and approaching the arrows.
They didn't seem poisoned, not by the smell, but they were sturdy, practically impossible to break, and the tip was shaped almost like a harpoon, designed to slash.
Theo felt a pang of nausea at the thought that this could happen to Liam.
It was while he was trying to stay calm and clear that he heard his name.
"Theo," Liam called only, halfway between a question and a prayer, his voice drifting with the wind "Theo."
He must have heard the trap snap and had probably stopped focusing on his heart.
"I'm fine," he replied, hoping there were no hunters nearby but hurrying back to Liam.
"I found the trap," he said again, knowing Liam would hear him anyway.
Five minutes later he finally reached the beta again, who was standing there with his arms crossed, a pout plastered on his face.
At least he wasn't angry anymore.
"Here I am."
"It's about time," Liam commented, unimpressed "it took you forever."
Theo didn't answer only because he knew he was still scared.
"Okay, now listen to me," he decided to say instead, kneeling next to the trap again "when you'll lift your foot, arrows will be shot at you from all directions."
Theo could swear Liam paled.
"So how do I—"
"I have an idea," Theo interrupted, his expression, focused "now, very slowly, you have to lie down on the ground without ever lifting your foot. Can you do that?"
"Yes," Liam then nodded "yes, but you... hold it there, okay?"
He looked so tense. Theo could only pretend not to be.
"Of course," Theo then confirmed, placing his hand on Liam's shoe and pressing, making sure the foot remained on the trap as the beta sat down and then lay down on the ground.
"Okay," Theo then nodded, looking at the trees, trying to remember what the arrows on the ground looked like "okay, now I need you to roll onto your stomach."
And Liam obeyed, very slowly, lying down in the right position, his chin resting on his hands, his heart beating rapidly.
"Okay," Theo then repeated, making sure Liam was ready, "I'm going to let go of your foot, you don't let go, okay?"
Liam simply nodded, stiffening his entire leg to press against the trap.
"Good," Theo then encouraged him, standing up and walking around him until he was in front of him, kneeling on the ground again. "ready?"
"For what?" Liam asked, swallowing a lump of saliva.
"Now you give me your hands and I'll drag you away from there."
"No," Liam replied immediately, clenching his fists against the ground "no, I... they'll hit me"
"That won't happen," Theo shook his head "I looked carefully at the distance, if we're fast enough, they won't even graze you"
"If we're fast enough?" Liam asked, his eyes slightly wide "this isn't a plan."
"Liam," Theo called back, forcing him to look up again "no arrow will hit you, I promise."
And he couldn't exactly promise it because he didn't control the laws of physics, but Liam had taught him that white lies also existed, and this was one of them.
"Do you promise?" Liam asked in a faint voice, turning for a second to look at the trap before returning to him.
"Yes," Theo confirmed, kneeling on the ground and holding out both hands.
And Liam looked at him suspiciously for just a moment longer before finally grabbing his hands.
Theo felt like he'd been struck by lightning.
However, he forced himself to focus on the plan and not on the fact that Liam was squeezing his hands as if they were the only thing that mattered in the universe.
"Ready?" he then asked, just to be sure.
And Liam simply nodded before turning his head toward one of his arms, his eyes squeezed shut.
Theo considered counting to three for a moment before realizing it was best to just rip the bandages off.
And so he counted to three just in his head before filling his lungs and pulling Liam toward him with all his strength.
The whizzing of arrows immediately filled the air with a chilling sound, metal digging into the ground enough to send shivers down his spine.
But Liam was there, curled up in front of him, their hands still clasped together, his forehead against Theo's thigh, his eyes closed, as if he were still trying to figure out if he felt pain or not.
"Little wolf."
The nickname slipped from his lips before he could stop it.
Liam just made a small noise in response, making no effort to pull away.
Theo wouldn't force him.
What he did instead was slip a hand from his, stroking his back, trying to calm him down.
"See? Whole and entire” he murmured then, a slightly crooked smile "I told you."
"I can't..." Liam snorted at that point, a slight tremor shaking him from head to toe "I can't move."
"Adrenaline crash, it's normal," Theo then replied calmly, his hand going up to the hair at the nape of his neck, stroking it "breathe, Liam, you're fine."
"Okay," Liam then replied, letting himself sink against him, as if waiting for permission "okay."
Theo couldn't remember the last time he'd been able to touch him like that, the muscles melting under his fingers instead of tensing, everything feeling more like magic than a curse.
Theo's eyes fell again on the trap, one of the arrows lodged just inches from Liam's foot, its tip finely chiseled, made to lodge in the flesh and never come out.
Theo tightened his hand on the back of Liam's neck for a moment, protectively, before leaning to his ear.
"You're fine," he repeated, more to convince himself than the beta "you're okay."
But evidently Liam was convinced too, because he suddenly sat up abruptly, moving away from him as if his hands were burning.
He looked shocked.
"We shouldn't..." he then shook his head, looking at him like a deer in the headlights "maybe it's better to go home."
Theo just wanted Liam to come back there, where he could touch him and hold him close.
What he accepted instead, like an old friend, was the cold of their distance.
"Yes," he confirmed, standing up "there's nothing else to find here, we'll talk to Scott about the traps."
"Sounds like a good idea," Liam replied before walking back the way they'd come, running away.
Theo followed him, trying to ignore the way Liam's hands clenched and unsteadily opened, or the smell of bitter coffee he gave off when he was upset, or the way each step was stiff, as if he expected another trap.
That was the best he'd get; half-sentences and stolen touches, that was all he deserved from Liam.
The walk to the car was entirely silent, just the sound of their hearts pounding over the rustling of dry leaves.
Theo tried to swallow his panic the entire time.
It was almost over. Now they'd get in the car and he'd take Liam home and then he'd never see him again: he'd go back to Derek's depressing apartment and be haunted by every single ghost of his past and then he'd go to the clinic and pretend everything was fine, over and over and over again, to the point of madness.
Theo truly felt like he was going crazy.
"Theo," Liam called back, already standing next to the car, looking at him questioningly.
And Theo was confused for a moment before realizing they were actually at the car and that Liam wanted him to open it so they could get in.
It took him a moment to find the keys in his pockets, the familiar billiard ball that seemed to give him some balance as he gripped it tightly between his fingers.
As soon as he started the car, the first thing he did was turn on the heating, passing his icy hands past it while Liam simply watched him in silence, his brows slightly furrowed, as if at a particularly bothering thought.
It wasn't until they drove off that the beta seemed to find something to say.
"I think I'll accept your offer," he simply said, a small smile on his face.
And before Theo could ask what he meant, Liam grabbed one of the bars from the glove compartment, opening it and starting to eat, the sweet smell of chocolate filling the entire space.
Theo felt the knot in his chest loosen a little.
"Good?" he asked with a slightly nostalgic smile.
Liam simply hummed something in agreement before taking another bite and leaning his head against the window, his eyes fixed on the dark sky.
Theo smiled a little wider before looking back at the road.
It was all about to end.
The knot returned, tighter than before.
They were already at the Beacon Hills entrance sign when Liam finished his chocolate.
"Remember that day at the reserve, when we looked at the stars for hours?" he then asked in a faint voice, his eyes turned to the cloudy sky outside the window.
Theo tightened his grip on the steering wheel, a wave of nostalgia washing over him “it’s been a long time”
“But… do you remember?”
Theo sensed all the uncertainty in that question, a vulnerability he hadn’t seen since they’d broken up.
“Yes,” he nodded, his jaw clenched “yes, I remember.”
Liam sighed, a phantom tension that seemed to leave him "me too."
The car slid lightly across the rain-soaked asphalt, and Theo couldn't help but think that this might be the last time he'd see Liam, the last time he'd be able to talk to him and have him close.
It wasn't far to his house, maybe 10 minutes, and Theo couldn't ignore the feeling that everything was slipping through his fingers. Again.
"What else do you remember?"
The question that escaped his lips before he could even think about it seriously, his scent a mix of nostalgia and panic if only Liam could read it.
Just something to hold on to. He desperately needed it.
"It's not important," Liam shook his head, pulling back a little, as if he hadn't brought up the subject.
"Liam..."
His name came out exhausted.
"We're almost home," Liam replied at that point, pulling a knee to his chest.
Feet on the seat. Theo had never cared less.
A memory that wasn't stars. Just one. He just needed to know that what they had haunted Liam's soul as much as it did with his.
"Liam, please."
"I can't, Theo," Liam replied at that point, turning to look at him, his eyes looking so sad "I can't do this, it hurts, okay? It hurts."
It hurts.
It hurt so much.
His heart sank mercifully.
He couldn't go on like this.
He jerked the wheel, Liam's half-scream sounding distant as he pulled the car to the side of the road, his breath caught as the wheels skidded for a second on the wet pebbles.
"Theo!" Liam blurted out once the car stopped, turning to look at him with wide eyes.
Theo, however, remained with his eyes fixed on the steering wheel, his hands clenched on it as he tried to come to terms with... with everything.
"Theo, what the f—"
"I remember everything, okay?" he interrupted, his jaw tense, his voice cracking "I remember when we looked at the stars and when we looked at the clouds and I remember the music in the car and the popcorn at the movies and the luna park in the rain and the races in the woods and the stupid noise your heart made every time I looked at you."
Theo stopped to catch his breath, Liam's shocked expression burning like fire in front of him.
He felt so stupid and pathetic as he spewed out everything he'd been thinking about for months and months.
“I know it hurts because it hurts me too,” he continued, shaking his head, trying not to get too emotional “I don’t even remember why we fought or why we broke up!”
And it was true, it had seemed like… just little things, his lies, Liam’s behavior, it seemed to be getting better, they seemed to be learning, they seemed to be healing.
And then everything exploded: they'd argued and then decided, still full of anger and resentment, that it was better to let it go, that in the end the two of them had never really had a chance.
"Theo..." Liam tried to stop him, almost... almost scared.
But Theo couldn't stop himself anymore. Maybe he didn't even want to, because if Liam really wanted to break his heart, if Liam really thought it couldn't work between them, he had to have the courage to tell him without the anger coursing through his veins.
"Liam, tell me one thing you remember," he then asked again.
"I can't."
"One thing," Theo urged "just one thing."
"Theo..." Liam begged with a look.
But Theo was too desperate at that point to give in.
One thing, just one thing, and everything would fall apart.
"Tell me one thing you remember about us"
"I remember we wanted to move in together!" Liam blurted out, his cheeks red, his breath short, his eyes watery.
Theo realized with horror that his eyes were watery too.
“We wanted… we wanted to live together”
Family. That was what Liam had said when they’d talked about it.
“Liam,” he replied then, his throat tight, “Liam, I remember every second I spent with you because I was so fucking in love with you” he then added in a broken voice, a faint whisper, “I’m still so fucking in love with you.”
That seemed like the biggest truth he’d ever said out loud.
But Liam only lowered his gaze, blocking him from seeing the tears he’d smelled so long ago “it didn’t work the first time.”
It was true. It was so painfully true.
"I know," Theo nodded, finding the courage to lift his chin slightly, forcing him to look at him "I know, and if you don't want to try again, I understand, but I needed you to know the truth."
Liam seemed breathless, as if that speech had knocked the oxygen out of his lungs.
Theo continued to hold his chin, the green merging with the blue until there was no longer any boundary between them.
Liam spoke again.
"It still does it," the beta whispered, unable to take his eyes off his.
"What?" Theo asked, confused.
"My heart, that stupid noise when you look at me," Liam then emphasized, his lip trembling, "it still does it"
Theo felt his entire world snap back into place.
"Liam, I really need to kiss you, so if you don't wan—"
Liam closed the distance before he could close his sentence.
And Theo could finally breathe again.
Liam's lips were exactly as he remembered them, warm and sweet as they fought against his, the beta instantly moving past the center console and onto his lap, his fingers tangling in his hair, deepening the kiss as if trying to steal the newly regained breath straight from his lungs.
Theo couldn't help but wrap his arms around the beta's waist and pull him close.
That kiss seemed to last an eternity, until Liam pulled away, resting his forehead against Theo's, gentle hands sliding from his hair to his cheeks.
"I missed you so much," Liam whispered, wiping away the tear that had escaped with his thumb.
Theo wasn't stable enough to respond.
"Just..." he murmured, his voice broken "just kiss me."
It was perhaps the first time Liam indulged him without protest.
He kissed him, over and over and over again, his hands sliding everywhere, craving more skin, more warmth, just more.
Theo was dizzy, Liam's mouth on him, the sweet scent of the beta and the slightly sour smell of his arousal.
"Theo..." Liam gasped against his mouth, tangling his hair between his fingers "home, now."
Theo should have thought about it, he should have stopped and forced Liam to talk about it, he should have pushed him away.
But in that moment, Theo just wanted Liam's hands everywhere.
"My home or yours?" he only gasped back, continuing to kiss the corner of his mouth.
"Yours," Liam then replied breathlessly "it's closer"
Theo just nodded before Liam captured his lips one last time, as if he wanted to savour them before finally forcing himself to get up from him and return to the passenger seat.
The ride home was a blur.
Theo kept his hand on Liam's thigh the entire time, the beta squirming in the seat as if he wanted to jump out of his skin, taking advantage of every red light to touch him, leaving wet kisses on his mouth, his face, his neck.
If they had reached his house without incident it would have been a miracle.