Chapter Text
Ilya was going insane. Certifiably insane, he thought, and all because of his big stupid mouth getting him in trouble with Shane, like always. He sat up against the headboard of their bed, listening to Shane turn the shower off. He had tried to follow him into the bathroom but Shane locked the door on him just as he had all week. He needed a cigarette and he needed Shane.
Pathetically, Ilya began to imagine his own husband's naked body, glistening with water, his hair was probably flattened down, causing drops of water to roll down his freckled cheeks-
And Ilya was hard again. Fuck. He needed to figure a way out of this or a way to finally break Shane's resolve. But with a husband like Shane Hollander this was easier said than done. The only thing stronger than Shane's personal discipline was his stubbornness.
4 Days Ago
"I cannot believe you." Shane's voice startled Ilya, causing him to nearly jump out of his skin.
Ilya tossed the cigarette out of his hand and off the deck of their house as fast as he could but it was too late anyway, he was caught. He turned slowly, eyes moving slowly up Shane's rigid body standing in the doorway to the porch. His arms were crossed, jaw set and eyes narrowed in on him. This wasn't good.
"It is...not what it looks like?" Ilya tried with a small grin, but it was no use. Shane just huffed at him. He was so cute when he was angry.
"It's not funny Ilya. You promised me you would stop smoking." Shane snapped at him. "You know how I feel about this. Have you just been sneaking around this entire time?"
Ilya felt a little embarrassed but also defensive about this whole "promise" in the first place. He knows smoking is bad but it's not that big of a deal. Based off the look Shane was giving him though, he thought better than saying that to him.
"No this is the first time since our conversation, I promise." Ilya supplied, moving towards Shane carefully as if he'd combust any moment. He gently grabbed Shane around the waist, pulling him in. "Моя любовь, it is not healthy just cutting off cold chicken. A few days is plenty of break in between, yes?"
Shane rolled his eyes, body still stiff in Ilya's arms. "First off, it's cold turkey not cold chicken and no Ilya a few days is not a good break in between smoking, you told me you wouldn't smoke at all! You couldn't even make it to a week!"
Shane pushed out of Ilya's grasp and walked back into the house, Ilya following him like a puppy.
"I can make it a week Shane. You think I need to always smoke but this is not true!" Ilya huffed, continuing to follow Shane into the kitchen where he was angrily continuing to unload the dishwasher.
"You need to have better self discipline, Ilya." Shane replied, not even looking at him now and only at the bowls he was slamming into the cupboard.
"Oh like you Mr. Golden boy? You are the master of self discipline?" Ilya smirked and leaned against the counter next to Shane. This got Shane's attention and his head whipped up, piercing Ilya with a glare.
"Uh yes I am! You know how diligent I am with my diet, exercise, and routine. You can afford to do the same." Shane snapped.
"Yes but those are not a vice like cigarette. You have no 'self discipline' as you say, with sex." Ilya smirked, watching Shane flush deeply.
Shane's eyes were nearly popping out of his head at this point and he stammered through his anger. "Wh-what?? What are you even talking about?!" His face was red hot and Ilya was sure he'd see steam coming out of his ears soon.
"Oh please, Моя любовь, you are insatiable in the bedroom it's one of my favorite things about you but do you know what a full time job it is to make sure I please my husband? It is not my fault you cannot resist me." Ilya gave him a wink, stepping in closer to Shane and backing him up. He put his arms around him, holding onto the counter to bracket him in.
Even through his anger he could see a flicker of desire in Shane's eye and Ilya thought he had him until Shane laughed in disbelief right in his face.
"Let me get this straight. You are saying that I have no self control about having sex with you? And you are equating that to you not having self control about smoking? That's what you're saying?" Shane face was absolutely bewildered and Ilya couldn't help but grin at how adorable his Shane looks with his eyes wide and cheeks pink.
"I am saying, Моя любовь," Ilya said lowly, leaning into Shane's ear, "that I can go a week without smoking but you could never go a week without sex. This is not your fault that you love my cock so much, this is understandable." Ilya grinned widely and kissed Shane's neck, feeling him shiver before he's suddenly being pushed back.
"Okay, Rozanov. Deal. You go a week without smoking and I'll go a week trying my hardest to resist having sex with you and we'll see who has better self discipline. Agreed?" Shane stuck his chin up, looking at Ilya with that competitive glimmer in his eye.
"Da. You will not last even a day but it will be cute to see you try." Ilya gave him another award winning smirk and leaned in for a kiss only meet Shane's palm with his lips.
"Sorry, I'm going cold chicken with the start of my week of self discipline. No kissing." Shane smiled sweetly at him and walked out of the room.
Suddenly this bet was not as fun as Ilya thought it would be.