Chapter Text
Luke Callaghan: Redemption
"They say luck smiles on you only once. Luck smiled on me when I almost ran over a rookie who stepped in front of my car, but I blew it and I’m going to have to deal with that."
Chapter 1
Luke was sitting at the counter of The Penny. He didn’t speak to anyone and no one spoke to him. The days after the breakup were hard, but he tried to deal with his own pain and the coldness of the judgments with a minimum of dignity.
The reason for the end of the engagement was supposed to be a secret, but everyone at the 15th Precinct seemed to know. It made everything heavier, McNally more exposed, and him a pariah. Deep down, that was how he felt; that was what he was.
— Hey, Luke, you okay?
The noise in the chair next to him and Jerry’s voice—the only person from the precinct who seemed to care—pulled Luke out of the silence his mind became when he wasn't analyzing a case or investigating a homicide; the only things he felt he was good at.
— After letting the same woman screw up my life for the second time, what do you think?
His voice sounded cold, without that protocol "I'm fine" response, when, in reality, everything was hell.
— Give Andy some time... When things cool down, maybe she can...
— Forgive me? — Luke interrupted him. Not with a question, but with irony. — She won't... I know it’s over.
Luke had tried to talk to Andy, but the words hardly left his mouth. What could he say? "It was only once?" "I'm sorry?" All of it was true, but in front of broken glass, no explanation matters. The only solution for him had not yet been invented by man: going back in time.
Luke checked his watch; it was past 10 p.m.
— What are you doing? — Jerry said upon seeing his friend leave a bill next to the untouched glass of beer.
— Going home.
⏳
Luke entered the living room at home and, at that same moment, regretted it. He couldn't just leave; even with her back turned, the rigidity of her shoulders made him certain she knew he was there.
— I thought you were already finished — he said, his voice coming out colder than he intended.
Andy remained silent. Luke couldn't see her face, but he knew she was trying to pull herself together; she didn't want to show weakness. The few interactions they had were always like this: silent, increasing the wounds and amplifying the pain.
— This is the last one.
McNally hardly looked at him at the precinct; Luke watched her through his office window. He knew his betrayal would throw her into Swarek's lap, it was a matter of time, and that increased Jo's anger and his anger at himself even more.
— Whenever you want, I’ll take my name off the deed to the house! — she said, picking up the box without looking him in the eye.
Luke had forgotten about the deed; he had forgotten that they already had a life together that now needed to separate.
— That’s bureaucracy. I’m in no rush.
— I am. The faster, the better!
For the first time, Andy looked him in the eyes. And Luke could see the pain, the anger, and, worst of all, the distance forming between them.
— Andy, I...
— Luke, don't — she interrupted him. — You made your choice when you betrayed what we had by lying in Rosati’s bed.
She walked past him, far enough not to touch, but close enough for Luke to smell her skin and know that he would miss her every day and would have to learn to deal with it.