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Darryl and the Dangers of Craigslist
(or, How Darryl Accidentally Joined Team Thor)
It wasn't the first time Darryl Jacobson posted an ad on Craigslist for a roommate but it was definitely going to be the last time. His first roommate, Alistair, worked in banking and was hardly ever home. Alistair got a huge bonus and a huge promotion and moved from their modest flat into an outrageously expensive condo. Then came Sri. Sri worked with Darryl at Tip Top Tech Services and, frankly, it was just a little too much togetherness for Darryl's taste. He was rather thankful when Sri got married and moved in with his bride.
Once again, Darryl posted an ad on Craigslist and began the rather draining process of interviewing potential roommates, trying to quickly identify and weed out the weirdos. He was successful until the day Thor Odinson came to see the flat.
In retrospect, the name should have rung a bell but in Darryl's defense, he'd just interviewed a series of potential roommates, each scarier than the last, when Thor simply showed up at his door.
"I am Thor Odinson," the giant man dressed like a surfer dude announced cheerfully. "And this is Mjolnir."
Darryl gawked. The man named his hammer. He carried his hammer and he named it. "Uh --"
"I have come to rent the room," Thor said.
"D-did we have an appointment?" Darryl stammered.
"We did not."
"B-but..." Darryl was sure his brain was broken. "How did you find me? I didn't put the address in the listing."
"I am Thor," Thor said, gesturing grandly and then leaned down to whisper confidentially, "It took mere moments."
Okay, so the guy was a hacker of some kind. They had something in common. Darryl gestured to the living room and plastered on a smile. "Um...we should talk and see if you'd be a good fit."
Thor set his hammer down and went to sit in one of the chairs, facing Darryl who sat on the sofa and grabbed his notepad. The giant blond man looked like he felt at home already. "I am ready to begin."
"Good," Darryl said, jotting down the man's name. "What do you do for work, Thor?"
"I am a Prince of Asgard and an Avenger." Thor flashed a winning smile at him. "Perhaps you saw me saving Midgard several times on your news broadcasts. Or perhaps you've seen my image on your Internet or in magazines."
Darryl's mouth dropped open as his brain processed exactly who was sitting in his living room. "Ohmigod. You're Thor!"
"Yes."
"The Avenger."
"Yes."
"W-with the hammer."
"Mjolnir," Thor agreed, nodding towards the hammer resting by the front door. "Right over there."
"And you want to live here," Darryl said, dumbstruck. "With me."
"Indeed I do, Darryl Jacobson," Thor confirmed with a friendly grin. "I wish to experience a normal existence and you are the epitome of a normal Midgardian. In fact, one might think you are abnormally normal."
Was he... Had he just been insulted by a Norse god? "Wait a second, how do you know my name? Or anything about me?"
Thor's grin grew wider and he winked. "There are some secrets mortals are not meant to know."
"Okay..."
"I am kidding! I asked the Black Widow to tell me whether you would be a suitable roommate."
"You what?!" Wait. The Black Widow knew his name and where he lived. Maybe... No. She was terrifying which made her knowing that information a Bad Thing. Darryl thought fast. "Rent is two twenty five a week and includes Internet and utilities. I require a two week deposit."
Thor suddenly grew serious. "I am afraid I do not have Midgardian money."
Darryl sent up a silent prayer of thanks. Sure, he saw the benefits of having an Avenger as a roommate, like girls might actually notice him but there were drawbacks too. Lots of drawbacks. What if Thor's enemies attacked the apartment? Or came after Darryl by mistake?
"I have gold." Thor dropped a large gold coin on the coffee table. "Will this suffice?"
"Uh --"
"Excellent. I wish to see my room."
"But --"
It was too late. Thor was in the bedroom and Mjolnir was flying through the air. "Perfect! This room has western exposure --"
"And it's furnished," Darryl added helpfully and then kicked himself.
"Excellent. I will move in immediately." Thor emerged from the room and draped a massive arm around Darryl's shoulders. "Tonight shall be the first of many that we spend engaged in manly pursuits."
"Um..."
"May I have the key?"
And that was how Thor Odinson moved into Darryl Jacobson's flat.
Darryl vowed that Thor would be the last roommate he ever had.
He didn't know at the time just how true that vow would be.
Not quite the end.