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Things were rough. About a month ago, some random guys tried to attack Neil outside of Eden’s. They’d seen him dancing with Nicky and assumed that they were gay. They weren’t wrong, but they were wrong about the person.
Andrew walked out of Eden’s, trying to find Neil, and found him cornered by two guys. Neil was talking back, as usual, but everyone knows that he’s better at starting fights than ending them. As soon as one of the guys took a swing at Neil, Andrew jumped in. He beat them both badly, and tried to bring out the knives, but Neil was urging him to stop and not to go for the knives.
Andrew was taken to jail when someone saw and called the cops, and no matter the reasoning for beating the guys half to death, the court made him get back on his drugs.
He got back to Palmetto two weeks ago after an appointment with a psychiatrist who was going to administer his drugs. He fought it hard, he hated the way those drugs made him feel, especially after being off of them for nearly a year now.
Since he’s been put back on his drugs, he’s been incredibly apathetic. Neil hates it. He wants his partner back. Andrew hasn’t said a nice thing to Neil since he was back, he barely said anything, honestly. He wouldn’t share the bed with Neil, wouldn’t try at practice, wouldn’t stop instigating fights, nothing.
Now, the foxes are all in their dorm, watching an old game. Finals are coming up, and they know that USC is going to be the team to beat, so they ordered pizza and brought out the drinks for a little watch party.
Of course, that’s when Andrew walks in the room. He glares at them all, grabbing some liquor from the table. “You couldn’t do this anywhere else?” Andrew asks, that bored expression on his face.
“No.” Neil says, pissed off with the apathy. He understands that it’s the meds that make Andrew like this, but it still pisses him off.
“And why’s that?” Andrew asks, staring at Neil.
“This is our dorm as much as it is yours. If you don’t want to watch, then don’t, but I’m tired of walking on eggshells around you.” Neil says, surprising everyone in the room. Neil hasn’t really made an effort to speak to Andrew since Andrew shut him down the first day he got back on his drugs.
“Walking on eggshells, huh?” Andrew says, laughing under his breath. “I don’t give a fuck what you do, I don’t see why you’d take me into consideration with what you do.” Andrew says, taking a long drink of the liquor.
“You sure seem like you give a fuck if you’re complaining about us being in here.” Neil says, making Andrew’s face show the clear anger.
“Neil, don’t.” Kevin says from behind Neil, knowing that it would only make things worse.
“Say that to my face.” Andrew says that angry grin across his face. Neil ignores everyone’s protests, standing up, walking over to Andrew.
“If you don’t give a fuck, then stop complaining.” Neil says, making Andrew shove him by his shoulders, putting the liquor bottle back on the table. Neil goes with the shove but stays standing.
“You’re walking a dangerous line here, Josten.” Andrew grins, making Neil shrug.
“Better to walk it than to accept it.” Neil says, shrugging, seeing as Andrew walks up to him.
“Neil, stop.” Nicky begs, wanting Neil to just accept this.
“No, I won’t.” Neil responds, standing his ground as Andrew closes in on him.
“You must’ve forgotten that I don’t care. I don’t feel.” Andrew says, obviously a threat. “I will gut you right here right now.” Andrew says, stepping closer, making Neil have no choice but to back against the wall.
“I don’t believe you.” Neil says simply, making Andrew pull out a knife from his armbands.
“Andrew, stop!” Renee says, standing up, being ready to intervene.
“Renee, back off.” Neil says, obviously angrily. He looks back to Andrew, seeing that grin on his face. “A month ago, we were partners. That doesn’t just go away, even with the drugs.” Neil says simply, making Andrew press the knife against his throat.
“It does.” Andrew says, grinning.
“Do it then.” Neil says, pressing his head forward, pressing the knife into his skin harder. Andrew doesn’t respond, but the foxes do. They all stand up, ready to pull Andrew back and disarm him. “Stop. All of you.” Neil says, sternly, making everyone but Renee and Kevin stop. Neil switches to French, “If you don’t stop, I’ll kill you myself if he doesn’t first.” He says, making Kevin come to a halt and grab Renee’s arm.
“Why stop them?” Andrew says, grinning, holding that knife there.
“Why not?” Neil asks, raising an eyebrow.
“They were going to save your life. Probably die trying, but it’s the effort that counts, isn’t that right?” Andrew asks, still grinning.
“Do it then. Kill me.” Neil says, taking a step forward, pressing the knife into his skin hard enough to draw blood, but he can’t feel it. He sees conflict on Andrew’s face, and grins. He knows what he’s doing, and that just confirmed it. “Do it, Andrew.” Neil says again, taking another step forward, making Andrew take a step backwards.
Andrew doesn’t say anything, he just thinks and steps back as Neil walks forward. “You have the knife in your hand, I’m already bleeding, so finish the fucking job.” Neil says, walking Andrew backwards to the opposite wall. When Andrew’s back presses against it, Neil can feel the foxes eyes on them.
“Fuck you.” Andrew says, pressing the knife a little harder, but his hand is shaking now.
“Been there, done that. I thought you didn’t care, nice to know you remember though.” Neil says, a small grin on his face, obviously antagonizing Andrew that much more.
“I hate you.” Andrew says, pressing the knife just a tiny bit harder, making more blood start to drip down Neil’s neck.
“You’ve made that clear, so why don’t you kill me? I’m sure you want to. It would make your life a hell of a lot easier, wouldn’t it?” Neil asks, hoping for a specific response.
“I want to kill you more than anything.” Andrew says, his hand shaking even more now, irritating Neil’s skin.
“I thought you didn’t want anything.” Neil says, grinning. “On your drugs, I mean. You always said you want nothing.” He elaborates, making Andrew drop the knife to the floor.
Neil and the rest of the foxes hear the knife clatter on the ground, and Renee is quick to grab it even though she knows he has more. “I fucking hate you.” Andrew says, his hand still shaking.
“Not enough to kill me.” Neil says, grinning. Andrew grabs his shoulders and flips them around, pushing him against the wall. Everyone else expects Andrew to hit him, at the least, but he presses their lips together instead.
Neil grins into the kiss, knowing that he was right. Andrew cares deep down, even if he can’t show it. Andrew pulls back, glares at Neil, and then walks out of the dorm. Neil just grins, wiping the blood off of his neck. The cut was barely deeper than a papercut, so he doesn’t care.
“You’re so fucking stupid.” Kevin says, shaking his head, letting out a breath of relief. “He could’ve killed you.” He says, angrily.
“He wouldn’t have.” Neil says, shrugging.
“You couldn’t have known that, Neil. That was incredibly reckless.” Dan says, obviously having been freaking out.
“I know him.” Neil says simply. “He wouldn’t have been able to kill me, even on the drugs.” Neil says, shrugging.
After everyone’s left the dorm, Andrew still isn’t back, but Neil has a feeling he knows where he went. “I’ll be back.” Neil says to Kevin, making Kevin shake his head, knowing that he’s going to find Andrew.
“Don’t let him kill you.” Kevin says, secretly a little worried. Neil just gives him a thumbs up and walks out of the dorm, heading for the stairs that lead to the roof.
When he gets up there, he sees Andrew sitting on the edge, smoking a cigarette in silence. He hears the door shut, and whips his head around, seeing Neil standing there. Andrew stands up, too close to the edge for Neil’s liking, and walks over to Neil, anger on his face. Neil doesn’t care, obviously.
Andrew grips Neil’s throat, as if he were going to choke him. He puts the cigarette between his lips with the other hand, blowing smoke in Neil’s face. He moves his hand a bit, to the side of Neil’s neck now, and looks at the small cut there. “Fuck you, I should’ve killed you.” Andrew says, pressing his thumb to the hollow of Neil’s throat, putting enough pressure to make it hard for Neil to breathe.
“Why didn’t you, then?” Neil asks, ignoring the pressure on his windpipe.
Andrew presses down a little harder, cutting off Neil’s air, but Neil doesn’t budge. He could easily get out of Andrew’s grasp, but he wants Andrew to see that he can still trust Neil. “I could do it right now. No witnesses.” Andrew says, acting like he’s pondering the idea. Neil stays silent, looking at Andrew, a grin not on his face, but obvious in his eyes. “Fuck you.” Andrew says, pushing Neil away from him.
“I trust you.” Neil says simply, making Andrew scoff, taking another drag of the cigarette.
“I don’t care.” Andrew says, going back to the edge of the roof.
“You will eventually.” Neil says, joining Andrew on the edge. When Andrew opens his mouth to talk again, Neil talks first, “If you’re going to threaten to push me off the roof, I’ll save you the trouble and just jump.” Neil says simply, making Andrew quickly put a hand to Neil’s chest, pushing him away from the edge. Neil grins. He still cares.
“Fuck you, leave me alone.” Andrew says, seeing that grin on Neil’s face.
“Night.” Neil says, grinning, walking back to the stairs.
This time, Andrew was only on the drugs for six months. The two guys’ injuries weren’t as bad as they were with Nicky, and Andrew went to his appointments with Bee every week. Bee reported back to the court, and they reduced it to six months.
When the time came, Andrew was in Easthaven for six weeks going through withdrawal. Betsy made sure to pick out his team before putting him in there so that nothing bad could happen again.
Andrew came back to them, obviously weirdly. He’d been drugged up, and for the most part, apathetic for half a year. The second he sees Neil, though, he’s angry. He’d threatened to kill Neil more than anyone else and almost did a few times. Knives to the throat, the stomach, more of Andrew’s hand wrapping around Neil’s neck and cutting off his air, but Neil never fought back.
When Neil sees Andrew walking out of those doors at Easthaven, he sees the anger on his face. Andrew walks right up to Neil, passing Nicky, Kevin, and Aaron by. “Fuck you, you’re so stupid.” Andrew says, pressing his lips to Neil’s. Neil kisses back, a wide grin on his face. Andrew’s tongue briefly slips into Neil’s mouth, but Kevin clears his throat, making him pull back, they were still in public, after all. “I could have killed you.” Andrew says, holding the side of Neil’s neck gently.
“You wouldn’t have.” Neil says, grinning.
“I don’t know how you could believe that. I had a knife to your…” Andrew says, trailing off, shaking his head, obviously regretting it all.
“Look at me,” Neil says, reaching a hand up to the side of Andrew’s face. Andrew nods and Neil presses his palm to Andrew’s jaw, “I trust you, drugs or not. You wouldn’t have killed me because deep down you still cared.” Neil says softly, holding onto Andrew.
“You’re crazy.” Andrew says, shaking his head. “Like, actually clinically crazy.” He adds, making Neil laugh.
“Maybe, but so are you.” Neil says, shrugging. “Let’s go.” He says, making Andrew nod.
They walk out of Easthaven, their hands linked together, Kevin, Nicky, and Aaron trailing behind them. Nothing’s changed, and it’s perfect.