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Blitzø was fucking exhausted. He'd just finished dicking Stolas down six ways from Sunday, and all he really wanted to do was flop down and snuggle up to the soft feathery bastard and sleep. But he couldn't. Because this was a business transaction, and Stolas would probably kick him out anyways. He might as well leave before he got kicked to the curb like a cheap hooker.
"Well, that was a blast and a half," he said as he released Stolas from his restraints. "Did you uh… did you have fun?"
"Oh, very much so," Stolas said, his tone lazy and satisfied. Fuck yeah. Blitzø knew how to fulfill his end of a bargain, yes siree.
The bird was trembling slightly beneath him, so he pulled a blanket up over his skinny frame and made sure he was well tucked in. Must be cold to be that thin, even when the room was warm as fuck from all the candles that were lit.
"Are you heading out now, darling?" Stolas asked. Yup. There it was. An invitation to leave, if Blitzø had ever heard one.
"Yeah, I'll get out of your feathers. I'm beat," Blitzø responded, already climbing off the bed to gather his clothes.
"You could stay, if you'd like," Stolas said. Polite son of a bitch. Why did he keep offering that if he didn't mean it? It was annoying.
"Nah. I gotta work tomorrow, bright and early. Don't have it in me to plow your ass again if I wanna be functional tomorrow," Blitzø said, pulling on his pants. "But hey, it was fun tiring me out, huh?"
"Yes," Stolas said, "it was wonderful."
It had been. Stolas had been so good, so submissive. He'd done everything Blitzø had demanded of him, had taken blows so sweetly, and had accepted praise and degradation like a champ.
Blitzø hummed, pleased with himself. He was earning the fuck out of the use of Stolas' fancy ass book.
"Alright, see ya, bird brain," Blitzø said, waving at Stolas from across the room. The guy looked exhausted. Good thing Blitzø was letting him sleep now.
"Goodnight, Blitzø," Stolas said. He sounded tired too. And maybe a little sad? Nah. He was just… closed off. Haughty maybe. Fuck if Blitzø knew. The bird was weird as hell and made no sense half the time. But they got what they needed from each other, nothing more, nothing less.
"Yup. Night," Blitzø said, and closed the balcony door behind him.
He was already at his van by the time he realized he'd left his Mama's broach on the bedside table.
Fucking fuck goddamnit. Now he had to climb back up the stupid balcony again, and Stolas was probably going to turn him to stone for interrupting his beauty sleep.
His arms ached as he climbed, and his eyes felt heavy. Fuck, he needed a good sleep. He half wished Stolas had been serious about the invite to stay over. It would be nice to sleep on that plush bed rather than on his shitty couch for one night.
The room smelled of stale sex, candle wax, and Stolas, almost overwhelmingly so. Blitzø found his tongue sticking out to taste the air.
Fuck yeah, tonight had been fun. And maybe if he was really quiet he could sneak in and out without Stolas noticing.
Except that he wasn't asleep.
He was a shuddering mess on the bed.
Stolas was curled in on himself, like a miserable little ball. His shoulders were shaking, and he was letting out the most pathetic little whines and hiccuping sobs, the kind that meant he'd really worked himself up.
Blitzø stood there in the doorway, his stomach sinking.
What the fuck?
Had… had Stolas not wanted…? But no. He'd checked in multiple times. Stolas had been delighted. He could have safe worded at any time.
Then why was he crying?
"Stolas?" He found himself saying before he could stop himself.
Stolas went completely rigid at the sound of his voice, and then he was scrubbing at his face desperately as he turned towards Blitzø. "Ah! Blitzø! You- did you need something?"
"Are you… you alright there buddy?" Blitzø asked, feeling rooted to the spot. Stolas' eyes were shiny with unshed tears, even the fucking top ones, and he was all ruffled up and kinda pathetic looking.
"Fine! I'm absolutely fine, nothing to worry about!" Stolas said, straining to sound chipper and missing the mark entirely.
"Okaaaaay," Blitzø said, spotting his broach on the bedside table. He could totally just grab it and go. Leave Stolas to whatever weird crying jag he was on and chock it up to rich people being eccentric.
Except Stolas looked so fucking broken. And Blitzø was a dick, okay, but he wasn't that much of a dick.
"Why are you crying?" he asked.
Stolas sniffled and wiped at his eyes again. "Oh it's no bother really. This happens, it's nothing to worry about."
Blitzø frowned. Their scene hadn't been that hardcore compared to some of the other stuff they'd done in the past, but… but this seemed a lot like how Blitzø used to shake after he got his shit rocked for meal money. How he'd crumbled after Verosika dommed his ass that one time.
"How often does this happen?" Blitzø asked, dreading the answer.
"Well," Stolas said. He looked squirrelly, like he'd rather look at anything except for Blitzø's face. "I… I suppose every time."
Blitzø didn't know what to say to that. His limbs felt numb, his head fuzzy. He'd been leaving Stolas alone to suffer this whole fucking time?
"Why?" Blitzø asked. "Why are you… why would you keep seeing me if it…"
Stolas blinked at him. "Because I enjoy our time together more than I dread this," he said, like it was the simplest thing in the world.
Blitzø was moving before he realized he'd made a decision. He climbed up on Stolas' stupidly tall bed and grabbed him, a little roughly if the way Stolas gasped was any indication.
"Sorry. Fuck, just… do you want me to hold you? Wait, fuck let me get you water," Blitzø rushed to say, nearly scrambling off of the bed. But Stolas grabbed him, holding him in place.
"Please stay here," Stolas said.
Blitzø sighed, not willing to investigate how that plea had shot a fucking bullet through his defenses. "Okay, hey. Okay, I'm here. Can you magic us over that water? I think we both need a drink."
He remembered how thirsty he'd been in college, after he'd wobbled his way home from getting his nipples nearly shocked off by a car battery. Remembered curling up in his bed, thirsty and alone, too fucking wiped to grab something to drink for himself.
He didn't want Stolas to feel that way.
Stolas waved the water over, catching it in one trembling hand. He was stiff as Blitzø slid into bed beside him, still shaking slightly.
"Shh. Don't worry, I'm here now," he said, feeling stupid for even saying it. What comfort would Stolas possibly be able to take in having his shitty imp fuckbuddy there with him?
But Stolas settled, going almost boneless and nearly spilling his water. Blitzø rushed to grab it, and held it up to Stolas' beak. "Drink," he said, and Stolas, ever the subby bitch, did as he was told.
"Alright, feathers. Just tell me when you're not thirsty anymore, 'kay?"
Stolas nodded, and let Blitzø feed him another sip.
"I believe I am finished with the water," he said eventually, so Blitzø took a gulp and tossed the glass down to the end of the bed. It was caught up in a purple glow before it spilled, and Stolas looked at him, annoyed.
"What? Just testing your reflexes," Blitzø said, grinning despite the pit that still sat in his stomach.
Stolas made a soft little hooting sound and floated the cup over to the bedside table.
Blitzø hesitated for a moment, before opening his arms. "Come on. Get in here," he said.
Stolas was on him in an instant, snuggling up against his chest. Blitzø stroked the soft feathers on his neck, quietly tidying them back up and smoothing them back into place.
They lay there silently, except for the voice screaming in Blitzø's head. He'd fucked up yet again. Stolas was his ticket to keeping his business afloat, and he'd been letting him suffer alone. He very carefully didn't think about how the thought of Stolas suffering pierced through him, book be damned. He couldn't afford to let himself slip even a little around this bird.
"You know, you could have told me," he said, voice soft. "I would have… I don't know. Stayed a little longer or whatever."
He expected Stolas to answer, but was instead met with a trilling little bird snore. Bitch had fallen asleep on him!
Blitzø smiled fondly, toying with his neck feathers. His eyes were growing heavy too, and he figured he might as well fulfill those dreams of sleeping in Stolas' soft bed. He could leave in the morning.
Holding Stolas close, feeling the heat of his body and the softness of his feathers, Blitzø promised himself that this was just normal fuckbuddy stuff. It wasn't going to awaken anything in him. There was nothing to awaken.
He fell asleep with a frown on his face, and a bird tucked snugly against his chest.