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Gold arrived at Granny’s Diner fifteen minutes before the time he had agreed to meet Belle. Fifteen minutes was a show of admirable restraint, considering that his first impulse had been to camp out in front of the building overnight in anticipation of his date.
A date. She had called it that. It had been her idea. He would have never broached the subject--never would have considered asking her--but she had asked him. To go on a date. To get a hamburger. At Granny’s. In Storybrooke, where they both lived.
If Gold had been tasked to imagine a more ludicrous ending to a session with a professional dominatrix, he would have come up short. But it had really happened. Belle French--kind, lovely Belle French--had asked him out on a date.
He kept repeating the fact to himself because he was having trouble believing it.
Sitting down at a booth, Gold kept his eyes on the door, so he would see her when she came in. Or he would see the mortifying lack of her when she inevitably realized that she didn’t really want to have lunch with him and skipped the date altogether. Such an action was entirely against Belle’s character, but what was more likely? That she would come to her senses and forget about him or that she would actually go through with this?
He didn’t breathe until the moment he saw her walk through the door.
“I’m not late, am I?” she asked as she sat down across the booth from him.
“No, not at all.”
Gold was struck again by how breathtakingly beautiful she was.The last time he’d seen her, she’d been decked out in a corset and riding boots, but she was just as lovely now in a soft sweater set and skirt. Maybe even lovelier.
“Have you ordered yet?”
“No, I was waiting for you.”
A daring light entered Belle’s blue eyes. “You want me to tell you what to order?”
“What?”
“You know, decide what food you’re allowed to eat. And you have to eat it, no matter how much you might not like it.”
Heart racing, Gold tried to swallow, but his mouth had suddenly gone dry. “Y-you said we were having hamburgers?”
Belle’s smile was no less wicked for being genuine. “And so we are. I just wanted to see what you thought of covert play.”
“I like it,” he said, too quickly. “If you want to--”
“I don’t,” she said. “At least not now, not yet. We need to talk about things before we do things. That’s what this date is about.”
Before Gold could say anything in response, Miss Lucas, the waitress, came to the table. “Belle! What--what are you? I mean, are you sure you’re in the right seat?”
He understood at once, why Miss Lucas would ask such a thing. Who would ever sit with the town pariah, the town monster? Why would Belle, especially, have anything to do with a man like Mr. Gold?
Belle didn’t seem to agree with Miss Lucas’s assessment of events.
“I’m exactly where I want to be, Ruby. Now, I’ll have a hamburger with extra pickles, and iced tea to drink.”
Gold ordered the same and Miss Lucas walked away.
“Is it alright to be here, out in the open?” he asked.
“I don’t mind if you don’t,” Belle shrugged. “We can keep shop talk discreet for now. Or even stay platonic. I wouldn’t mind talking to you about the weather and local events for half an hour.”
“I just…” Gold’s fingers rubbed together. “I’ve never done this before.”
“You’ve never dated?”
“Never dated someone like you.”
She blanched for an instant, then recovered. “What does that mean, ‘someone like me’?”
“I mean,” he lowered his voice until it was barely audible. “Someone who knows what I want.”
“Ah,” Belle grinned. “I see. And someone who’s ready to give you what you want.”
He swallowed. “Yes.”
“Even without being paid for it? You’ve never… experimented?”
He shook his head. “Not with the women I’ve been with.”
“Do you mind telling me about them?”
“There’s only been two, really. My ex-wife and a long-term girlfriend. They were both… definite, about what kind of man they thought I was. I couldn’t tell them the truth about the kinds of things I wanted.”
“I bet that was lonely.”
Gold nodded. “People look at me, at the image I present, and they assume that’s what I really am. That’s what Cora and Milah did. They saw power, heartlessness--masculinity, for lack of a better word. They would never accept that there was another side to me.”
“And obviously, that didn’t work out either time.”
“No.”
Belle chewed on her lip, thoughtfully. “Is there anyone else in your life you feel comfortable around? Maybe not with the whole kinky thing, but just in general? Do you have friends, male or female?”
“I have associates,” Gold rolled his eyes at the word. “But no one I can talk to about anything that’s not business.”
“Do you have a therapist?”
“Do I need one?”
She shrugged. “Most people do, in my opinion. If more people had more places where they could be honest about themselves, my job would be a lot easier. Actually, my job would probably be more challenging, but that can be fun too.”
“Are you in therapy?”
Belle nodded. “Not that there’s anything wrong with me, but it’s nice to have a person I can be completely honest with.”
“Even if they only listen to you because you pay them to?”
“I do it for people, why can’t someone else do it for me?”
“That’s a very brave attitude.”
“It’s not really about bravery, just about taking care of myself. It’s no different than paying someone to clean my teeth or cut my hair.”
“I’m sorry, are we talking about therapy or what you do?”
Another shrug. “I don’t see how they’re all that different, honestly. It’s all about safety and vulnerability and honesty.”
“And when you’re not ‘on the job’?” Gold asked. “Then what is it all about?”
“I guess the same thing,” she said. “Maybe I’m more focused on challenges when I’m not getting paid to make someone feel valid in themselves.”
“Challenges?”
“Yeah. Like pushing people, testing limits. Stuff like that.”
“That’s what your personal life is like?”
“‘Between my job and my studies, I don’t have much of a personal life,” Belle admitted. “But yeah, I think that’s what I’d like it to be.”
Something clicked in Gold’s mind. “You don’t… have a boyfriend, do you? Or are you more of an open-relationship type?”
“No, I’m single right now. I wouldn’t have asked you out if I wasn’t.”
“So you’re not an open-relationship type?”
“Nah. I have friends who are into polyamory but I’m not sure how much it’s for me. I gotta make one relationship work before I try branching out.”
A sudden warmth entered Gold’s cheeks. It came from the way Belle bandied about words like “relationship” and “dating,” and how blase she was about admitting her availability. She wouldn’t have asked him out if she wasn’t single.
Their burgers arrived. Belle dug into hers right away, but Gold took a moment to add some ketchup and mustard.
“Don’t you want any?” Gold offered her the red bottle.
Belle shook her head. “I’m not much of a condiment person. You know, I’ve actually never tried a burger with ketchup.”
“Never?” he asked. “But you must try it! I tell you, condiments completely transform a food. It’s like magic, really.”
She gave him a considering look. “Like magic, huh?”
“Powerful magic.”
With another shrug, Belle took the ketchup bottle from Gold’s hand. She opened her burger and decorated the patty with a tentative squirt. Then she reassembled her burger and took a bite.
“Oh, wow,” she spoke with her hand over her mouth. “That is better! See, this is why I need to take my own advice and try new things more often.”
Gold found himself smiling, much more broadly than circumstances demanded. “I’m glad you like it.”
****
Belle and Theo chatted through the rest of their meal. They were still talking when Ruby came and took the plates. And when Ruby dropped off the check. And when Ruby came back after fifteen minutes to make sure they didn’t want anything else.
“I guess that’s our cue to go,” Belle said sheepishly.
“It’s a shame,” Theo said. “I’m sure it’s a cliche to say, but I really don’t want this date to end.”
“Do you want to go somewhere?”
He swallowed. “Back to my place?”
“I was thinking mine, actually. I want to show you something.”
“By all means, let’s go.”
The Storybrooke Free Public Library had been closed for as long as anyone could remember. Belle lived in the caretaker’s apartment on the second floor. Technically, the library and the apartment were two separate addresses, with no official entry between them. But Belle had a skill for picking locks, so the interior door to the library was hers for the opening.
“Don’t tell my landlord about this, okay?” Belle teased as she made her way into the library.
“I would never,” Theo promised.
The interior of the library was dark. Newspapers covered the windows, blocking the light from outside. High shelves towered over them, but Belle knew the place well enough to walk around without fear of bumping into anything. She held Theo’s hand as she led him into the central reception area, by the circulation desk.
“Is this what you wanted to show me?” He was slow to release her hand once they stopped walking.
“I wanted to tell you about it. About my dream.”
In the dim light, it was hard to read Theo’s expression, but it seemed like he was interested. “By all means, please, tell me about your dreams.”
“I just want to get this place opened again,” she said. “I wanna see this building full of people, all reading and researching and getting whatever help they need--and I want to be the librarian.”
“Well, you’re on the right track, aren’t you? You’re studying to get your masters in Library Sciences.”
“I am,” Belle said. “Though that’s still a year or two away. And it takes more than just a degree to get a library open.”
“What else do you need?”
“A building, which I already have, more or less. And books, which are also already here. I mostly need public support and some political willpower to get anything done.”
“Is that why you’re telling me about this?” Theo asked, a hint of sharpness in his voice. “You want my influence?”
“I’m telling you because this is important to me, and I thought you might want to know. After all, I know some pretty personal details about you. I thought this would make things even.”
“So you aren’t just trying to get me to back you?”
“I mean, I would hope that you as a rational citizen would see the benefit of having a public library in your town. If you don’t like libraries, we’ve just run out of a lot of things to talk about. But I’m not asking Mr. Gold for one of his infamous favors, if that’s what you’re getting at.”
Theo let out a heavy sigh. “Good,” he said. “There are days when I get sick of dealing. I know it’s what I do. I’m good at it, and it’s made me a wealthy man, but it poisons the soul after long enough. You start to see everything as a potential transaction.”
She stepped closer to him, took his unresisting hand. “No, I’m not asking you for anything, Theo, I promise. I just wanted you to know more about me.”
“I’m glad I do. And you’re right, a library would be just what this town needs. When the time does come when you need help, count me in.”
Belle beamed. “Thank you, Theo.”
He smiled back at her. “I like the way you say my name, Belle.”
“I like the way you say mine.”
With a final squeeze, she dropped his hand. “Do you want to look around? I’ve been trying to fix the place up a little, just so it looks more appealing when people come in and see it. I figure if the work is half done, the Mayor might be more inclined to do the rest.”
“What are you working on?” Theo began to follow her. “If there’s anything major, it should fall on me as the owner.”
“Oh, it’s nothing big,” Belle said. “Just a bit of cleanup and making things look nice. Like here.” She led him to a secluded reading nook. “This shelf used to just end, but I moved a chair around and now it’s much more welcoming.”
“So it is.”
“Maybe it’s all silly and a waste of time. But I have to do something, you know? I have to try.”
“Of course,” Theo said. “I understand the ambition. You have a goal, you want to fight for it, in whatever small way you can.”
“I’m glad you get it,” she said “I’m glad--I’m glad you’re here.”
“Of course,” he said again. “Though I admit, this isn’t what I expected when you said you wanted to go back to your place.”
Belle gave him a sly grin. “You think I don’t consider the library part of ‘my place’? You think we can’t do in here what we could also do in my bedroom?”
Theo swallowed. She heard the gulp in the dim light. “What do you want to do?”
“The joy of us being here is that you’re not paying me.” She walked over to him, hips swaying. “So we can do anything we want.”
“So… sex?” he asked. “Real sex, not just--” he shuddered to say it out loud “--not just me masturbating in front of you?”
“Yeah,” Belle slid her hand up his lapel. “We can actually touch each other now.”
To her surprise, Theo took a step backwards. “Do--” he cleared his throat. “Do you mind if-- That is, do you want me-- I mean… I mean, how do you want me?”
“As yourself,” she said simply, honestly. “I don’t want you to pretend with me, Theo. I don’t want you to try to be something you’re not.”
“Really?”
She gave an encouraging nod. “Back at the restaurant, you said your exes wanted you a certain way, whether that was how you felt inside or not. I don’t want that. I want you, Theo. The real you. The you who doesn’t have to feel afraid anymore.”
He swallowed again, looked down at his hands. “You really want that man? That sniveling, pathetic--”
“That’s not who you are,” Belle said firmly. She took a step closer to him, close enough to put her hands on his face. “There’s nothing pathetic about submission. There’s nothing bad about wanting to be small and safe and taken care of. That’s what I want to give you, Theo. It’s what I want to give everyone I work with--the safety to admit your desires and the experience of enjoying them.”
She felt more than saw him trying not to look at her. It was like she was the sun, and he would blind himself if he stared too long.
“Do you really want to dominate me? Even if I’m not paying you?”
“Yeah,” Belle said. “I do.”
****
Gold couldn’t believe it. Belle French--beautiful, intelligent Belle French--was willing to let him debase himself in front of her. Previously, he would have put such sufferance down as her just doing her job, doing it for the money. But he wasn’t paying her. She didn’t want him for his money or his influence or the image of power he presented. She wanted him. The real him. The him he had never shown to anyone before her.
“Last time, I knelt for you,” he said.
“You did,” Belle smiled at the memory. “Do you want to kneel for me again?”
“I do.” It came out as a whisper.
He didn’t move, he was waiting for her order. Somehow, it wouldn’t be real until it came out of her lips.
She must have understood, because soon she said the magic words. “On your knees, sweet Theo.”
Gold fell so fast it was like his legs gave out on him. Once he was down, he set his cane to the side and stared up at his Mistress.
“Good boy.”
God, the shame that flooded him at hearing those words. The shame and the joy and the almighty confusion of the two. He wanted to be a good boy. He wanted her to tell him he was a good boy. He wanted to please her, in every way she would allow.
“I said ‘good boy,’ Theo,” she spoke with an air of expectation.
Frantic, Gold’s mind raced for the proper response. What would she want to hear? What would a truly good boy say in this circumstance?
“Thank you?” he tried. “I mean, thank you, Mistress.”
“Very good,” she purred.
“Thank you, Mistress,” he said again.
Nothing about Belle had changed. She was still dressed in a conservative yellow cardigan and demure skirt. She was still friendly and light and every other quality Gold admired about her. But somehow she was different. She stood up straighter, spoke with more definition, moved with more purpose. This was how Belle dominated, with kindness and gentleness.
“I think I’ll have you stay dressed, for now.” She walked behind him as she spoke. He didn’t turn to look at her. “But there’s no reason your suit can’t be part of our game. Do you have an interior breast pocket?”
“I do.” He opened his jacket, to show her.
“Good! That’s very good, Theo.” Behind him, he heard the muffled rustle of fabric and shoes. “I want you to take this,” she held out something pink in front of him, “and keep it close to your heart.”
Instinctively, Gold reached for the item without taking the time to think about what it was. When he touched it it was warm and slightly damp. It wasn’t until the scent hit him that he realized what he was touching.
“This is your underwear.”
Belle’s grin was wickedness itself, an expression no less beautiful than her kind smiles. After a minute of Gold mutely holding her underwear in his hands, her grin faded. “It’s not too much, is it? Too soon?”
“No,” Gold said quickly. “I just…” He looked down at the fabric, at the darker spots of wetness. “I just don’t believe it.”
She raised her skirt enough to flash him. “Believe it, sweet Theo. Now, do you want to take care of my panties for me?”
“Yes,” Gold whispered. “Yes, Mistress, I do.”
“Well then, do it. Put them away.”
Quickly, he secreted the underwear in his breast pocket. Then he buttoned his jacket again. As Mistress had predicted, the bulge of fabric rested against his heart.
“We haven’t really talked about what you like to do sexually,” Belle said casually. “Is there anything that really gets you going? Anything that drives you wild? Anything you want to do to me?”
There was no end to what Gold wanted to do to her, to do for her, to thank her for everything she had given him even in the brief time she had known him.
“I could ask you the same question,” he said. “What do you want me to give you, Mistress?”
“Honesty is always the first thing I want, from anybody. But especially from you, Theo. I want you to tell me what you’re comfortable with, what you want, what I can do for you.”
Gold’s mouth quirked. “Are we at an impasse? Each of us wants nothing more than to please the other?”
“Maybe,” Belle chuckled. “But I have some hints as to what you might like, and I know what I enjoy, so I think we’ll be able to make something happen.”
He swallowed. His mouth was suddenly dry. “Like what?”
“Like would you mind if I sat on your face?”
His heart rate doubled at her words, but he tried to stay calm. “I would not mind in the least.”
“Good boy,” Belle raised her skirt.
“Thank you, Mistress.”
It should have been smothering, the darkness and the closeness underneath Belle’s skirt. Instead, it felt welcoming, a safe place for him to hide in. Gold tilted his head back so the warmth and the wetness enveloped him. Her cunt was so flavorful--salty and sour in the best way. He was ready to drink her down for the rest of his life.
She balanced delicately on his face, her high heels on either side of his kneeling body. She grabbed a hold of his hair and braced herself against his head. Gold was ready. Weak though he was, he was strong enough to support her. Strong enough to give her whatever she needed. His hands reached up under her skirt to grasp the perfect globes of her ass. He pushed her toward him, pushed himself deeper into her, until he couldn’t breathe.
He pulled her away, just far enough so he could gasp for breath.
“Don’t stop,” she said above him. “I was almost there.”
“Fuck,” he whispered, then he pulled her down again.
He moved his mouth and lips and tongue around her glorious pussy. He drank deeply of her wetness--that nectar of the gods. Belle pushed his head and pulled his hair in encouragement. The pain only aroused him more.
He felt her as she began to come. Her walls closed in around his face, clenching tighter and harder and faster. He moved with the rhythm of her pleasure, wanting nothing more than her joy, existing for nothing more than her satisfaction. In the dark heat, in the wetness and the silken ecstasy, Gold knew nothing but Belle, nothing but Belle’s orgasm.
She came with a cry he could hear even through the muffling of her thighs around his ears. It was deep and high all at once, an exaltation that took in the full range of possible expression.
“Fuck, that was good,” Belle moaned. “Fuck, that was--what was that?”
“Hello?” A man’s voice called out through the mostly-empty library.
She scrambled off of him, straightening her skirt and composing herself as best she could. Gold tried to stand, but even with his cane his legs were too numb from kneeling.
“Is there someone in here?” The man’s voice called again. Heavy footsteps crunched over the debris on the ground. The beam of a flashlight swept around them.
On the floor, in the shadow of the reading chair, Gold was reasonably hidden. But Belle stood out like a light in the middle of this dimmed area. He wanted to hiss at her to hide, but speaking would only draw more attention to them both. He was forced to watch as the flashlight swung over Belle, then stopped when it saw her.
“Hello.” Now that the voice was closer, Gold recognized the Irish lilt of Graham Humbert, Storybrooke’s town Sheriff. “You’re Belle French, aren’t you?”
“Yes,” Belle said cautiously. “I live here. That is, I live upstairs.”
“Yes, that’s right.” The Sheriff moved his flashlight out of Belle’s eyes, a disarming gesture. “But I don’t think this part of the building is covered under your lease.”
“No,” Belle admitted.
“So how did you get in?”
At that, Gold saw his opportunity. With as much grace as he could muster, he got up off his knees. He made it to look like he had just come out from behind the shelves as he stood to face the Sheriff. The beam of the flashlight shone in his eyes, but he didn’t blink.
“I let her in,” Gold lied comfortably. “This is my building. I was showing Miss French how neglected the place is getting, without a librarian to take care of it.”
“I’m a librarian,” Belle explained, “That is, I’m going to be one.”
“Uh-huh,” the Sheriff said, though his tone didn’t sound convinced. “And, uh, did the two of you hear any noises while you were in here?”
“Noises?” Belle squeaked.
“We haven’t heard anything,” Gold covered for her smoothly. “It’s been as quiet as, well, a library.”
“That’s right,” she agreed. “We haven’t heard a peep.”
“Right-o,” the Sheriff raised his eyebrows knowingly. “Must have been my imagination. There’s no way the two of you would be making noises in here. That’s the sort of thing rowdy teenagers get up to, not two upstanding citizens with homes they can go to if they wanted to do anything untoward.”
“Exactly,” Gold didn’t miss a beat. “This was just a property tour, as I said. Nothing untoward at all.”
“Good to know.”
With that perfectly reasonable explanation clear in his mind, Sheriff Humbert made a polite exit. As soon as he was gone, Belle heaved a sigh.
“Shit,” she muttered. “Fuck, we almost got caught.”
“We did get caught,” Gold corrected her. “It was only our good luck that the Sheriff decided he had better things to do today than make our lives miserable.”
“It might not have been that bad,” she said. “I mean, this is your building, and we are consenting adults.”
“There’s more to ruination than laws,” he said. “Just the rumor of you being here with me is enough to…” He shook his head. The terrible truth was clear to him now. “We can’t do this again.”
“I guess not,” Belle agreed. “We’ll stick to our homes from now on.”
“That’s not what I mean.” Gold looked down, fiddled with the head of his cane. “I mean, we can’t be seen together in public. Not again.”
“What are you talking about?”
“You saw the stares we got at the diner. The more you associate with me, the more people will think you want to be with me.”
“I do want to be with you.”
“No one wants to be with me,” Gold said calmly. “Not in Storybrooke. Surely you know that, Miss French, that I’m the most hated man in this town.”
“That’s--”
“I should have seen it sooner,” he cut her off. “I should never have agreed to go out with you. This whole thing was a terrible mistake.”
Belle opened her mouth, but no sound came out. “Well,” she said at last, “if that’s the way you feel...”
“It has nothing to do with you,” Gold tried. “No. No, it has everything to do with you. You’re so good and likeable, and you’re trying to get this library started. You have a mission, a dream. Being associated with me will only hinder that.”
“You said you were going to help me.”
“And I will,” he promised. “But in the shadows, behind the scenes. That’s where I do my best work anyway. You can be the face of this library and get people to rally around you. I can’t.”
She sighed. “Are you serious? Do you really think people are that narrow-minded?”
“In Storybrooke? About me? Yes. I’ve never minded my reputation, but now it might hurt you, and I cannot endure that.”
“Then screw Storybrooke. We can be happy together, without anyone else’s permission.”
“But what about the library? Are you willing to say ‘screw it’ to your dream?”
Belle pressed her lips together and looked away. When she spoke, there were tears in her voice.
“This isn’t fair.”
Gold stepped closer to her, close enough to kiss, but he didn’t dare. “It’s not,” he agreed. “And I’m sorry.”
“We can still be together in secret?”
“Someone will find out,” he said. “That’s the way of scandal and public humiliation, and it’s always worse for the woman. The only way--”
“Yes?”
“I could keep coming to Boston,” he said. “I would just be one of your regular clients. I’d pay you, and it would all be confidential.”
“You could never just be a client to me.”
“We could try.”
Belle stepped away. She was silent for a long time. Doubtless, she was going through the facts of the situation, searching for a loophole. But Boston was the best loophole they were going to get.
“I guess we can try,” she said at last.
“I’ll set up an appointment as soon as I can.”
“You’d fucking better.” Her hands clenched into fists for a moment, then relaxed. Every part of Belle seemed to deflate. The light and bubbly air that seemed a constant part of her was gone.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “But you’ll see, this is the best way. The only way.”
“Sure,” she didn’t look at him. She just walked out of the library.
Gold stayed. Slowly, he let out a long breath. This was the right thing to do. It had to be, because otherwise why did he hate it so much? Personally, it was all over between him and Miss French. It would be all professional from now on.
It was over. It occurred to him that they hadn’t even kissed.
And now they never would.