Archive of Our Own

Buck looks exhausted. 

Even more exhausted than usual. 

It’s been 3 months since Buck came back to the station, and still no one is really talking to him. Eddie’s heart feels like it physically hurts sometimes. He misses his best friend. He just doesn’t know how to fix things. And he still feels hurt. 

He still feels a lot of things. 

Buck has been looking extra rough the past few weeks. The first couple of months already seemed to be wearing down on the younger man, but lately it’s definitely worse. 

Lately, even Eddie wants to ask if he’s okay, but he just can’t quite get himself to do it. 

Buck is sitting at the breakfast bar in the kitchen, looking like he’s about to fall asleep into his oatmeal. Eddie watches him cautiously, his heart aching. Buck’s head slips forward a little as he nods off against his hand that seems to be the only thing holding him up. He nods out twice more before Eddie almost moves to talk to him. 

Hen beats him to it, though, and places her hand on his shoulder. Buck jumps a little at the touch, and Eddie watches as Hen leans in to say something quietly to him. Whatever it is has Buck standing and talking to her quickly. Eddie wonders what’s going on there, but he makes himself turn away. 

That night, after dinner, Eddie watches as Buck walks through the loft and to the kitchen to answer his phone. He doesn’t know why he does it, but suddenly he finds himself following the man. He stops at the edge of the kitchen when he hears Buck’s voice.

“So she was good? No crying?” Eddie hears Buck softly ask. “I’m so glad to hear that. The tears nearly got me last Tuesday. I nearly called in for my shift.” Buck lets out a soft chuckle, and Eddie feels his chest warm. It’s been so long since he’s heard any kind of fondness pouring from Buck. Not that that’s any surprise. Things have just been awful. 

“Will you give her a kiss for me?” Buck sighs, bringing Eddie back from his thoughts. “Tell her I’ll be home in the morning as soon as I can.” 

Eddie wonders who he’s talking about, or talking to, for that matter. He decides he wants to know, so he steps into the room into Buck’s line of sight as the man whispers his goodnights. Buck’s eyes widen when he looks at Eddie. Eddie doesn’t speak.

“Uh, sorry, am I in your way?” Buck asks awkwardly as he moves to the other side of the walkway.

“No,” Eddie says, fighting every urge to just pull his exhausted-looking friend into his arms. “I just-” Eddie shrugs and looks down at his feet before looking up at Buck. “-Are you okay?”

His words must catch Buck off guard cause the younger man suddenly looks sort of spooked.

“What?” Buck finally sputters out. Eddie sighs.

“You look like hell, man,” Eddie explains. “I know things are-” Eddie swallows thickly. “I just wanted to make sure you’re okay..”

“I’m good,” Buck assures.

“Come on, Evan. You look like you haven’t slept in weeks.”

Buck looks like he’s contemplating something for a moment. 

“It’s hard to just explain.” He says after a while.

“Try.”

“Will you follow me home after shift?” Buck asks nervously. “It will be easier to explain, and I don’t really want to talk about it here.” 

“Yeah, Chris will already be at school and he-”

“Has science club on Wednesdays anyway.” Buck finishes easily, reminding Eddie just how much their lives were wound together. 

“Yeah.”

“So we can talk about it after shift, then?” Buck clarifies. 

“Okay.”

The rest of their shift goes by smoothly with just a few small medical calls, and then, before Eddie knows it, he’s following behind Buck. It takes him longer than he’d like to admit to notice that they’re not driving their usual way to the loft. He’s even more confused when they pull up to a duplex not too far from his own house, and Buck pulls into the driveway. 

“Where are we?” Eddie asks when he gets out and walks over to where Buck is waiting for him. 

“I uh live here,” Buck says awkwardly, avoiding eye contact. 

“You gave up the loft?” Eddie is baffled. He always felt like Buck loved his loft. 

“I had to.” Buck shrugs without further explanation. 

“Had to?” Eddie feels more confused the longer they stand there. 

“Let’s go in. I’ll explain everything then.”

When Eddie walks through the door behind Buck, he sees some of the things he knows were at the loft. Then he sees a whole bunch of things that don’t make any sense to his brain. A play kitchen is set up in the corner with a bunch of toys surrounding it and what looks like a few tumbling mats folded up. 

Eddie's mind races as he tries to create reason for what he’s seeing. 

‘Did Buck get a girlfriend with a kid?’

‘Is this like a roommate situation?’

“Buck.” Eddie finally says softly. Buck smiles at the confusion painted all over his face. 

“Gooood morning! Welcome home!” Maddie cheers somewhat quietly as she steps out from what Eddie assumes is the kitchen. She freezes when she sees Eddie. “Oh I didn’t think you were-”

“I haven’t yet,” Buck says quickly before she can finish. 

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

Maddie’s eyes shift between the two of them. 

“Okay, well, um, I’m ready to head out and-” She glances at Eddie quickly before looking back at her brother. “-she’s asleep in her bed. Passed out during snack time.” Eddie’s mind races as he watches them. 

“Thank you for staying last night.” Buck grins brightly at his sister. 

“Of course, Ev. Amanda says she should be back and ready before your 72 is over so we’re all good now.” Maddie assures her brother before moving to pull him into a hug. 

“You’re the best,” Buck says as he gives her a squeeze. “I’ll probably give her a call later just to make sure everything is okay.”

“I’m sure she will appreciate that.” Maddie pulls away and whispers her good luck to him before she slips through the door. 

“Are you hungry?" Buck asks as he moves through the room and into the kitchen. Eddie follows him.

“Not so much,” Eddie says. 

“Okay.” Buck keeps moving around the kitchen, and Eddie takes a moment to look around. The house is simple, but it looks warm and homey. It screams Buck.

“You going to start explaining now?” Eddie asks, growing impatient. 

“I don’t even know where to start.” Buck sighs and scratches the back of his head.

“Just start somewhere.” Eddie encourages.

“So about a few months ago, I got this call from-” Bucks' words are cut off suddenly by a screech. 

“DADA!” A little voice follows the noise. Buck’s face lights up more than Eddie has ever seen before as a little girl runs into Buck’s legs. 

“Hi, sweet girl,” Buck says sweetly. “Were you good for Auntie Maddie?” Eddie’s chest expands. 

“I good.” The little girl giggles. 

Of course you were! My little angel girl!” Buck cheers as he swoops the little girl up into his arms and kisses all over her face. The girl squeals with laughter as she tries to push his face away.

“No more Dada! No more!” She laughs. 

Eddie feels like he might faint from watching them. He’s still confused, but obviously, his brain can make enough connections to figure that this little girl is Buck’s daughter somehow. 

“Okay, babygirl. I’ll stop.” Buck chuckles, and he pulls back to smile at his daughter before turning to open the cabinet next to them. He pulls out a box of biscuits. “You wanna have a snack and watch your shows while Dada talks with his friend?” It’s only after Buck says that that the little girl seems to register that they’re not alone. She narrows her eyes at Eddie. 

“Who dat?” She asks, looking back at Buck.

“That is Eddie. He works with Daddy.” Buck explains to her. The little girl peeks over at Eddie again. He smiles at her. 

“Firetruck?” She says, pulling a chuckle from Buck’s chest.

“Yeah, baby,” Buck says, watching as his daughter gives Eddie the stare-down. Eddie gives her a little wave, making her tuck her face into Buck’s neck. “Come on, sweet girl. Let’s get you all set up for the moment.” Buck chuckles before kissing her on the head. He shoots Eddie a look. “One sec.”

Eddie moves to sit at the little table, feeling weird just standing in the middle of the kitchen. He wipes his clammy hands on his jeans nervously.

When Buck comes back into the kitchen, Eddie can hear an alphabet song coming from the other room. He waits for Buck to take a seat in front of him before he smiles softly at the exhausted man. 

“So that’s why you’re so tired huh?” Eddie asks gently. 

“I hear the 2s are terrible, and I believe it because that little miss will throw a tantrum the size of Texas at the drop of a hat.” Buck chuckles softly. “She’ll be three in a few weeks so lets hope she will lighten up on that soon.”

“How?” Eddie asks, not specifying what he means, but Buck can guess. 

“Got a call from a social worker a few months back. She said I was listed as this little girl's father and they had been trying to get ahold of me. Then there was a blood test and a bunch of interviews and boom. I had a daughter.”

“What happened to her mom?” Eddie asks cautiously. 

“She was in a car accident while Rosie was in daycare. The daycare didn’t have anyone to call since her mom didn’t have any family.”

“So she was put in the system?” Eddie asks, his heart hurting for this little girl.

“While they tried to look for me, yeah.” Buck nods.

“Then they found you.”

“They did. Obviously, I called Maddie and Carla, and they helped me with everything. It definitely took some time to get it all together, but it's been over two months since I brought her home. 

“Who else knows?”

“Hen found out from my social worker. I didn’t realize they were familiar.”

“That’s what she said earlier?” Eddie presses. Buck nods. 

“She said I should tell everyone but-” Buck cuts himself off. 

“But what?”

“I don’t want everyone to pretend to not hate me anymore just cause they feel bad for Rosie and me.” Buck shrugs.

“I don’t hate you,” Eddie says immediately. “I don’t think I could if I tried.

“Well, it sure felt like it.” Buck huffs.

“I’m sorry.”

“No, don’t,” Buck says stiffly. “I made my bed, and I had to lie in it. I understood.”

“So Bobby doesn’t-”

“I actually put the paperwork on his desk before I left today. I needed to change some things and add Rosie to my insurance and stuff.”

“You know he’s going to call,” Eddie says confidently. He’s been seeing more than anyone, the way Bobby looks at Buck longingly. He knows Bobby misses Buck, something fierce. 

“I was going to ignore it, honestly.” Buck runs a hand through his hair. 

“He misses you, ya know? We all have.”

“I don’t really know what to do with that, Eddie. I’ve been here for months.” Eddie feels a wave of guilt rush over him. His best friend was struggling even more than Eddie could ever picture and none of them even knew. 

“Can I meet her?” Eddie asks shyly, feeling suddenly nervous. 

“Do you want to?”

“Absolutely.”

The rest of the morning goes by quickly, and somehow the three of them end up napping in Buck’s bed until Eddie’s alarm goes off to pick up Chris from school. Eddie tries to slip out quietly since Buck and Rosie didn’t wake up from his alarm, but once Eddie opens the door, Buck’s eyes shoot open. They find Rosie immediately, and he calms a bit before he squints up at Eddie.

“Sorry, it’s just time to pick up Chris,” Eddie whispers. 

“Oh.” Buck pouts as his eyes close again. “Okay.”

“Do you guys want to come over for dinner?” Eddie asks. Buck peeks up at him with a little smile now on his face before he nods once and gets comfortable again. “Okay, good,” Eddie says softly. “Come over when you wake up. I’m sure Chris will be so excited to see you. And meet Rosie.” Eddie can only tell that Buck hears him from the little chortle that slips from his mouth before he's suddenly snoring again. He slips out quietly and heads to get his son with a new feeling nestled into his chest that he can’t quite name. 

Chris was, of course, absolutely stoked when Eddie told him Buck was coming over for dinner. It made Eddie feel even more shitty about how long it had been. Chris was very much missing his Buck.

“So does this mean when Buck takes us to the aquarium or the zoo, now that Rose will be with us?” Chris asks from the table where he’s decided to do his homework today, so he can sit and ask Eddie a million questions.

“Yeah, buddy. She’s Buck’s daughter, so she will probably always be with us if he is.” 

“So she will be like my little sister then?” Chris says happily. 

“What do you mean, mijo?” Eddie asks, feeling his heart do a flip in his chest.

“Well, Buck is like my second Dad, so that means his daughter would be my sister, right?”

“You feel like Buck is your second dad?”

“Isn’t he?”

The doorbell rings before Eddie can answer, and suddenly his son is shooting out of his seat.

“Careful!” Eddie calls out as his son stumbles on his way to the door. Eddie follows quickly behind him.

Buck is beaming at them when the door opens. He’s got a giant go bag on his shoulder, a toddler in his arms, and Eddie is 100% sure his heart shouldn’t be racing like it is.

“DEEE!” The little girl cheers before throwing herself out of her father's arms and into Eddie's. Eddie catches her easily and kisses her cheek. 

“Hi Rosie girl!” Eddie says sweetly before turning around and walking away. Buck scoffs.

“Wow. What am I, chopped liver?” He asks before Chris throws himself at Buck.

“BUCK!” Chris cheers with a laugh as he's being lifted into the tall man's arms. Buck holds him tight. “I missed you, Buck.”

“I missed you too, kid,” Buck says softly

When Buck pulls out of their hug, he realizes they're alone.

“Come on, let's see where your dad stole my daughter off to.” Chris snickers as he follows Buck into the kitchen, where they find Rose planted on Eddie’s hip while he stirs the pasta. 

“Dee! Passa!” Rosie says happily. 

“That’s right, smart girl, I am making pasta,” Eddie tells her with a laugh. Buck’s heart skips as he watches them.

“At least he doesn't burn it anymore.” Chris teases. 

“Hey! I’ve gotten better!” Eddie defends.

“Thank God for that.” Buck snorts, watching as Chris laughs. He notices his daughter watching the young boy then. “Sweetheart, this is Chris,” Buck says, putting a hand on Chris’s shoulder. “Eddie’s son.”

“Kis.” She says sweetly before looking back at Eddie. “Dee’s Kis?” She questions. 

“Yep!” Chris tells her, pulling her attention back to him. “Eddie is my dad. Sometimes I call him Papa.”

“Papa Dee!” Rosie says excitedly, and Buck thinks heart might actually give out at this rate as Eddie and Chris laugh at the little girl's excitement. 

“Dad, can Rosie and I watch TV while you finish dinner?” Chris asks. Eddie smiles at her.

“You wanna watch TV with Chris, sweet girl?” Eddie asks her. Rosie looks at Chris before she smiles shyly. 

“TV Kis.” She nods gently before she wiggles to be put down. Eddie places her gently on the ground and watches as she follows Chris. He looks up to find Buck watching them too.”

“Guess they’re hitting it off.” Eddie snickers. 

“I was hoping they would,” Buck admits sheepishly. “She is pretty good with people. Very bubbly.”

“Well, Chris basically already claimed his role as big brother before he even laid eyes on her,” Eddie tells him nervously. Buck’s eyes widened. 

“Oh.”

“I thought it was sweet,” Eddie confesses, feeling his face heat up. His embarrassment only dampens when he notices the redness of Buck’s ears.

The rest of the night goes very smoothly as the four of them eat and settle onto the couch for a movie. Rose has latched herself to Chris’s side, and Buck thinks he spends the entire movie watching the two of them. It’s like a dream. One he never let himself even imagine. 

When the movie ends, Buck announces it is time to head home, so he tells his daughter to say goodnight. She and Chris both pout.

“Oh no. Now there are two of them.” Buck looks at Eddie in a panic when he sees them both with pouty faces. Eddie chuckles and shoves Buck's shoulder.

“No pouting tonight kiddos,” Eddie tells them. “Rosie girl doesn’t have a place to sleep here, and you both can’t fit in Chris’ bed all night,” Eddie explains before looking directly at his son. “We can look for a toddler bed or something for sleepovers, okay?” 

“Promise?” Chris presses.

“Promise.” 

Buck watches them fondly, wondering how his life flipped so quickly. 

“Okay, Angel Girl.” Buck claps his hands as he stands up. “Let’s go!” 

“Kis, Dada,” Rosie says sadly. 

“It's okay, Rosie. I’ll see you tomorrow after school!” Chris announces confidently. “Little sisters always pick up their big brothers from school! I see it all the time!”

“Bruder,” Rosie says with a smile. 

“Brother,” Chris assures with a firm nod as he puffs out his chest. He holds out his pinky to Rosie who instantly takes it in hers. Eddie looks up to catch Buck’s eyes glossing over.

Okay, guys.” He says softly. “We will make sure Rosie girl comes for pick up tomorrow.”

“Yay!” The kids cheer. 

“Chris, go get ready for bed while I walk them out, okay?” Eddie tells his son. 

“Okay, Papa.”

“Papa Deeee!” Rosie says excitedly.

“Rose honey-” Buck says nervously. 

“It’s fine,” Eddie says quickly before he realizes Buck might be taking offence. “I-I mean if you don’t- Uh, I don’t..”

“Okay,” Buck says, finally, putting Eddie out of his misery. Eddie lets out a sigh of relief before he chuckles awkwardly. 

“O-okay.” Eddie breathes out. 

“Dads are so weird.” Chris snickers. 

“Dads!” Rosie grins at Buck before looking at Eddie. Buck’s stomach swoops while Eddie feels his heart skip. 

“Okay, babygirl, let’s go,” Buck says softly before launching Rosie up in the air to catch her swiftly. Eddie tries and fails not to flinch. “Night kid,” Buck tells Chris before swooping down to plant a kiss on his head. “See you tomorrow.” Rosie plants her own kiss on Chris’s head. 

“Bye, Buck! Bye, Rosie!”

Buck quickly makes his way to his car to buckle in his daughter. Eddie follows behind with most of their things. Definitely not purposely leaving a few things behind for his house as he thinks about needing to go shopping now.

“So should I pick you two up tomorrow on my way to get Chris, or do you wanna meet here and then we can go?” Eddie asks. “I don’t really have much going on tomorrow, so whatever you want to-”

“You could come over after you drop him off.” Buck interrupts. “We could have breakfast and maybe take Rosie to the park. She loves the swings!” 

“That sounds great, actually.” Eddie smiles softly at him. 

“Dee! Night night, mwah!” Rose yells from her seat. Eddie looks at Buck. 

“She uh-” He scratches the back of his neck. “She wants you to give her a goodnight kiss. Maddie does it when we leave late from her place. Soo..”

“Oh,” Eddie says cutely before shuffling over into the back seat. He kisses all over Rosie’s face until she squeals in delight.

“Dee!” Rosie giggles. “No more Dee! No more!” The little girl wiggles. 

“Okay, okay.” Eddie concedes softly before booping her on the nose. “I’ll see you in the morning, Princessa.” 

“Night Dee,” Rosie whispers.

“Night, Babygirl.” 

Buck swallows thickly as he watches Eddie with his daughter. He wonders briefly if this is how Eddie ever felt watching him with Chris. His stomach is already doing weird things before Eddie smiles at him again. 

“Night,” Buck says softly before slipping into the driver's seat. 

“Night Buck,” Eddie calls out.

The drive home from Eddie's is silent. Rosie passed out as soon as they turned off Eddie’s street, so Buck spirals quietly.

'Eddie met his daughter today.' 

'His daughter, who immediately LOVED Eddie.'

'Chris called himself her brother.' 

'She called Eddie Papa Dee!'

Buck feels like his heart might really be giving out when he gets his daughter home and into bed, and she peeks her eyes open for a moment.

“Dee?” She questions. 

“Eddie is at home, baby. We will see him tomorrow.”

“Kis?” She pouts.

“We will see them both tomorrow, baby.”

“Marrow?” Rosie's eyes flutter as she fights her sleep. 

“Yes, baby. Tomorrow.” Rosie sticks out her little pinky to her father, and Buck feels like he could die from how cute she is. He wraps his pinky around hers gently and watches as she finally falls to sleep. 

When Buck plops down on his couch, he takes a deep breath before reaching for his phone. There’s already a text from Eddie waiting for him, and it makes him smile, so he lies back and replies.

Eddie: My girl already sleeping?

Buck: Pretty sure she’s actually MINE but yes, she's out. 

Eddie: I don’t know Buckley. I think I’ll be giving you a run for your money.

Buck: Chris already likes me more. I’m sure MY daughter will also be team Buck. 

Eddie: Keep telling yourself that. I may have lost my son’s favor but that little girl already LOVES me.

Buck: Whatever you say Diaz.

Eddie: She’s definitely the best Buckley. 

Buck: I’m telling Maddie you said that.

Eddie: I’m sure she will agree with me.

Buck: You suck

Eddie: Goodnight Evan <3

Buck: Sweet Dreams Eds <3 

Buck sleeps better that night than he has in weeks. Even if he does wake up to a little elbow in his ribs in the middle of the night.

“Morning Dada!” Rosie says brightly as soon as Buck opens his eyes.

“Morning, sweet girl,” Buck replies roughly. 

“Papa Dee?” Rose asks instantly, and Buck sighs.

Great

“Eddie will be here in a little while, baby. He has to take Chris to school.” Buck explains to her. 

“Bruuderrr,” Rosie says sweetly. 

“Yeah, baby.” Buck chuckles. “Brother.” 

“Panacake?” Rosie looks at Buck with wide eyes. 

“Pancakes it is Babycakes.” Buck stretches out. “Let's get you changed and dressed first.”

Rosie bounces out of the bed excitedly before stumbling down the hall with her dad hot on her heels. She giggles the whole way and Buck’s heart warms. He always wanted to be a dad. To love a child the way he knew a parent actually should love their child.

Every morning since he brought his daughter home, he feels so thankful to have her. Even on the mornings when he got no sleep the night before. His daughter is the greatest thing to ever happen to him. 

A knock on the door sounds almost as soon as Buck turns off the stove. He’s literally just set a giant stack of pancakes on the table. 

“DEE!!” Rosie yells ecstatically before shooting off her booster and running past Buck towards the door. Buck silently dreads the days he has to worry about her actually being able to open the doors herself. 

“Dada, hurryyy!” Rosie huffs as she jumps up and down by the door. Buck just laughs at his daughter's antics as he unlocks the door. 

Eddie’s face lights up as soon as he sees Rosie. 

“Dee!” The little girl screams as she launches herself at him. Eddie catches her easily and pulls her up onto his hip.

“Hi Princessa,” Eddie says sweetly. “Did you sleep well?”

“Wiff Dada.” She informs him happily. Eddie shoots Buck a look that says “sucker,” so Buck just sticks out his tongue as a response. 

“Something smells good,” Eddie announces as he steps through the door.

“Dada maked Panakcakes!” Rosie informs him happily before wiggling to be let down. She shoots off back to the kitchen the moment her feet hit the ground. “Come, Dee!” She calls out behind her. “Panacakes!” 

“I’m comin’ Babygirl.” Eddie chuckles before shooting Buck a smug smile. 

“Ugh, she is totally gonna like you more than me.” Buck huffs dramatically. 

“Eh, I get our girl, and you get our boy. At least it’s even now.” Eddie shrugs before following after Buck’s daughter, leaving a dumbfounded Buck behind him. 

“Our?” Buck says softly after he’s left alone. He quickly pulls out his phone to text his sister. 

Buck: MADDIE!!!! (Everything is ok) I AM FREAKING OUT!

Maddie: Need me to call?

Buck: Give it like 15 so it looks casual enough.

Maddie: Should I be concerned?

Buck: You’re going to be so smug about this

Maddie: O M G

Buck: Don’t start. Talk soon. 

Maddie: O M G ! !

Buck slips into the kitchen and back into his seat casually as he watches his daughter. Eddie has his arms over the table, cutting up a pancake on her plate as she smiles up at him. He manages to eat a couple of pancakes before his phone starts to ring. 

He watched them the entire time. 

It’s becoming very apparent that Rosie is immensely taken with the man. Like father, like daughter, apparently, because Buck remembers how quickly he was also hooked. 

“So sweet girl, Dada Buck told me you like the swings!” Eddie says excitedly.

“Swing swing!” Rosie cheers. 

“Finish your breakfast, and we can go, okay?” Eddie smiles softly at her, and Buck's heart clenches in his chest. Eddie turns to smile at him too before glancing at Buck’s phone, suddenly reminding him that his phone is ringing. “Go ahead and get that. I’ve got her.” Eddie assures him. 

“T-thanks.” Buck stammers as he fumbles his phone a bit, standing to answer the call. “Hey, Mads,” Buck says just as he walks out of the kitchen and towards his room. 

“You’re in love with him!” Maddie shouts out. 

“Maddie!” Buck whispers back at her. “What if he was close enough to hear you!?”

“Is he?” She asks flatly.

“Well, no, but he could have been!”

“I’m not hearing any denial here, Evan.” The call goes quiet for a moment.

“You should see him with her, Maddie.” Buck sighs. “It’s literally making me into a pitiful puddle of goo!”

“So yesterday went well, then?” Maddie says warmly.

“If by went well, you mean we basically spent the whole day together, and Chris deemed himself her big brother before the day ended, then yes.”

“Aww! Did he really?” Maddie coos. “I love him.”

“She called Eddie Papa Dee.”

“Papa Dee?”

“Dee is how she says Eddie.”

“You are so fucked.” Maddie snorts. 

“Maddie,” Buck whines. “What the fuck do I do?”

“What do you mean, Buck?” Buck can literally hear the smugness in her voice. 

“How do I- I don’t know, act..normal?”

“When have you ever acted normal about that man?” Maddie huffs. 

“You are not helping.”

“Does Eddie seem upset or uncomfortable at all?” Maddie presses.

“No.. Actually, he seems kinda..giddy about it all.” Buck confesses. 

“I think you should just…go with the flow.”

“Go with the flow?” Buck repeats. 

“I just mean if no one is having any problems with anything, then don’t make it a problem.” Buck sighs. 

“I guess that makes sense.”

“Exactly. So just go with it. You might end up exactly where you’re meant to be.”

“Maddie I-”

“Ohhh Dada Buckkk.” Eddie sings from the hall. “We have an impatient princess on our hands who is ready to swinggg.”

Maddie snorts from the other side of the phone.

“Have funnnn.” She teases before she hangs up.

“I’ll be out in one minute!” Buck calls out as he opens his dresser, figuring he may as well get dressed before getting Rose ready so they won't have to wait on him again. 

When Buck steps out of his room, he finds a bouncing little girl waiting for him. Her hand held in Eddie’s. Eddie, who must have gotten her ready while he was in his room, because she is wearing her favorite leggings and ladybug shirt with her hair in two little braids. 

“You look beautiful, Angel!” Buck smiles down at her.

“Dada Buck, hurry!” She giggles as she grabs onto his hand too and pulls. Buck shoots Eddie a look.

“Dada Buck, huh?” He teases. Eddie blushes.

“Sorry.” He looks away. 

“Don’t be. It’s cute.”

When Rose gets to the park, she instantly takes off to play. The park is designed for smaller kids, so Buck isn’t worried. He learned quickly that Rosie loves to be an independent girl and always asks for him when she needs him. His heart skips a beat every time she lets out an excited giggle and looks up to see if he’s watching her.

“She’s actually perfect.” Eddie sighs as he watches her.

“I know. I thought maybe I was just biased but everyone who has met her so far has agreed with me, so statistically she’s just the best.” Buck’s throat tightens with emotion. “I was going to take her to meet Athena tomorrow. I-if you wanted to come with us.” Buck shuffles a bit. “I’m actually kinda nervous about it.”

“You think Athena is going to care about anything other than that little girl?” 

“I think she’s trying to get me and Bobby to sit down and talk.” 

“Would you want that?” Eddie asks gently.

“I-I don’t know.” Buck shrugs, smiling when Rosie checks to see if he saw her climbing the little steps. “I mean, I miss him obviously, but maybe-” Buck pauses. 

“You can talk to me.”

“I think I needed the reality check of all of this.”

“What do you mean?” Eddie’s face pinches.

“Like I needed to remember that the 118 is-” Buck swallows. “We’re a team. Not a family. I think I sort of forgot that, and I needed to be reminded.” Eddie’s head snaps towards Buck.

“Buck- No..” Eddie shakes his head. “We are a family.” He lets out a sigh. “I think that was really the problem, actually.”

“What do you mean?” 

“I just mean-” Eddie pauses. “Don’t get mad, but did you think about why Bobby didn’t want you to come back so soon?” Buck scoffs.

“He didn’t think I could-”

“He was terrified, Evan.” Eddie cuts him off. “We were all terrified.”

“I don’t understand.”

“He had to watch you be dragged out from under that truck, Buck. Then we watched you spit up blood and almost die right in front of all of us. Bobby was literally the person that bomber was after. You don’t think after all he’s been through with losing his family that almost losing you like that might have brought up some stuff for him?”

“H-he never said anything.” 

“Did he really get the chance?” Eddie shoots him a sympathetic smile.

“You think I should talk to him?” Buck asks.

“I think he owes you an apology, Buck, I do, but I also think you should forgive him.”

“I don’t even know if he wants that. He just acts like I don’t exist unless he’s barking orders at me.”

“He’s ashamed. You almost died, Buck and he blames himself for that.”

“It wasn’t his fault.”

“We know that. Bobby probably does too, on some level. That doesn’t mean he’s not blaming himself.”

“Fine. If he’s with Thena, I will talk to him.” 

“Good.”

“Dada Bee!” Rosie calls. “Psssh now please!”

“Did she just?” Eddie snorts, shaking his head fondly.

“I love her so much.” Buck chuckles before the two of them make their way over to his daughter. 

“Watch Papa Dee!” Rose shouts to Eddie. “ Dada go wayy up!” 

Buck plops his daughter into the swing seat and grins as she squeals the moment he pushes her. 

“Go Dada go!” She giggles before turning her head to look at Eddie. “Papa too! Papa too!”

Eddie chuckles before walking over to Rose and giving her a push back towards her father. The little girl laughs so loudly that Eddie feels like it heals parts of him the way his son's laughter always does. It fills the hollow spots in his chest and he has to focus extra hard for a moment on not tearing up.

After a couple of hours at the park, Rose is barely keeping her eyes open as she sits on one of the park's climbable animals. Buck swoops her up just as she’s beginning to nod off and she automatically tucks herself into her father’s chest. Buck’s grin widens when he catches Eddie watching them. 

“I usually take a lap around the park so she’s a little more out before I have to buckle her into her carseat.”

“Okay,” Eddie says softly as he falls into line next to Buck on the walking path.

“Sometimes I never thought I’d get here.” Buck confesses as they walk. “ I mean, I always wanted to be the best Dad I could ever be, but the last couple of years made me doubt it was really for me.”

“Evan Buckley never being a dad would have been like a crime against nature.” Eddie scoffs. 

“Yeah?” Buck asks fondly, shooting Eddie a sheepish smile as he adjusts his daughter gently. 

“Absolutely. You are too good with kids to never be a dad.”

“Thanks.”

“Thank you, actually.” Eddie insists. “I don’t know if I ever realized how much you did for Chris and me until-” Eddie trails off.

“Eddie I-”

“No, don’t.” Eddie stops him. “I should have appreciated you when I had you, Buck. Instead of being so pissed that I didn’t.”

“You always have me,” Buck admits. “If you had called, I would have always come. Always.”

“Yeah well, I think that just makes me more of a dick, actually.”

“Eh, we’re both dicks.” Buck shrugs. 

I’m glad I followed you home after shift.” Eddie tells him earnestly. 

“I’m glad too,” Buck says shyly right before his daughter lets out a snore, making them both giggle.

“Oh, she’s really, really yours.” Eddie teases playfully.

“Shut up.” Buck grumbles as he feels his face heat.

Getting Rosie into her seat is never an issue when she’s asleep. Being her father’s daughter means she basically sleeps through anything. 

“You still wanna hang out while she naps?” Buck asks once they’re pulling out of the parking lot. “She usually is out for a couple of hours, and I don’t know if you have like errands or something.” Buck seems to suddenly be nervous, much to Eddie’s amusement. 

“You’re not getting rid of me that easily, Buckley. Besides, what if my Princessa wakes up and I’m gone?!” Eddie puts his hand on his chest dramatically. “She would be so upset!” Buck chuckles.

“Two days! Two days and she already got you wrapped around her little finger.” Buck snorts. “Sucker.”

“Please.” Eddie rolls his eyes. “Chris had you after one car ride.” Eddie retorts easily. Buck gasps.

“You barely tell him no too ya know!” Buck defends.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever you say.” 

After Buck puts Rose into her bed, he slips back out of her room and into the kitchen to find Eddie already washing the dishes 

“Hey, I was gonna do that,” Buck assures.

“Sit down, Evan. You’ve done my dishes plenty of times. Let me do this.”

“Eddie, I can-”

“Sit,” Eddie says a little more firmly this time. Buck drops into a chair at the table and grumbles. The smirk on Eddie's face shows he definitely heard but doesn’t care.

“If Rose wakes up early, do you think we can get Chris early from school?” Buck asks after a while. “I really missed him, and it’s Friday anyway.” Eddie pretends to think about it, knowing he’s going to say yes.

“I guess that would be okay. I’m sure Rosie would love to see his school.”

“She’s gonna love it!” Buck agrees happily. 

When Eddie is done with the dishes, he makes them both coffee before sitting down at the table with Buck. Buck tells him about the first couple of weeks with his daughter. Eddie’s heart aches at having not been there for them both during such a stressful time.

He should have been there from the moment Buck found out. 

Last night, when Eddie lay in bed, he felt almost too giddy to sleep. Having his best friend back was everything. Not to mention the perfect little addition to their family. 

The 118 family, that is. You know cause they’re a family. That’s definitely what Eddie meant when he was thinking about it. He definitely was not daydreaming about his friend. Not at all. 

“I feel so sad sometimes that I missed out on so much of the beginning of her life,” Buck tells him. “And even if I know it wasn’t my fault, I still feel awful.” 

“I know how that is. Eddie admits. “It was actually my own fault I missed so much, though.”

“Hey, don’t do that.” Buck scolds him quickly. “You were young and trying to take care of your family, Eds. You did what had to be done. Chris knows that. He knows you’ve only ever done everything you can for him, okay?"

“Only you ever make me feel better about that, you know?” Eddie tells him. “Whenever anyone else tries it just doesn’t get through but you- it always seems easier to accept when it’s you.”

“Happy to keep reminding you then.”

“Ditto.”

When Rosie wakes up from her nap, she’s instantly asking for Chris, so Buck thinks it is absolutely perfect, since Eddie already agreed to get him early. They shuffled into the truck quickly, and now they’re following one of Buck’s favorite office people back to Chris’s classroom, and Rosing is practically bouncing with excitement as she walks with them after insisting she be put down as soon as they stepped through the doors. 

“Okay! I’ll just-” Miss Jenny starts before Rosie suddenly darting past her and into the room. 

“Rosie!” Buck calls after her. 

“Bruder!!” Rosie shouts as she runs into the room. 

“I am so sorry!” Buck tells Miss Jenny as he shoots past her. The woman just giggles behind her hand as she watches him.

“ROSIE!” Chris cheers out. Rose speeds over to him when he calls out to her. 

“Rose, honey, we were supposed to wait in the hall.” Buck huffs. 

“BRUDER!” Rose squeals like that’s an entirely perfect explanation, and in her defense, Buck can’t really blame her. 

“Well, hello, Mr. Buckley.” Chris’s teacher grins. “We haven’t seen you in a while, but that was quite an entrance.” The kids in the class giggle, and Buck can feel himself redden.

“She’s faster than she looks sometimes, I swear.” Buck chuckles sheepishly. 

“Mr. Diaz, you may as well join the chaos as well,” the teacher laughs. Eddie smiles at the kids as he steps further into the room before looking back at the woman. 

“I promise we just meant to grab Chris, not disrupt.” 

“Bruder!” Rosie yells again as she wraps her arms around the boy..

“Well, who is this little darling anyway?” The woman asks.

“This is my sister Rosie,” Chris announces before either of the men can say anything. “She’s Buck’s daughter.” 

Eddie and Buck both look a little sheepish at the teacher, who quirks a brow at them.

“Well, isn’t that wonderful?” She tells Chris warmly. 

“Are we going home now, Papa?” Chris asks.

“PAPA DEEE!” Rosie dances around as she claps. Buck chews his lower lip. Now the teacher is definitely going to think they’re together. Chris calls her his sister. Rose calls Eddie Papa. Buck's face feels hot.

“We’re sorry for the interruption.” Buck laughs awkwardly. “We will just be going now.” He swoops his daughter into his arms before turning to grab Chris’s backpack swiftly as Eddie motions for his son to follow them. 

“See you Monday, Chris!” The teacher calls out as they walk out.

“Bye!”

The ride home is filled with talking and giggling, at least from the back seat that is. Eddie and Buck both seem a little stuck in their heads.

“Dada!” Rose calls out suddenly.

“Yeah, baby?” Buck asks, sneaking a look at her in his mirror. 

“We go Papa Dee’s wiff Kis?”

“Uh, we’re actually heading home, baby,” Buck explains to her. 

“Dee and Kis stay?” She follows up quickly.

“If Eddie says they can, of course, baby.” Buck smiles.

“Wowww..way to make me the bad guy,” Eddie whispers. Buck snickers.

“Please, like you’re gonna tell her no.”

“Dee, you stay, pease? Rose asks sweetly. “Kis too.” Eddie tips his head back against the headrest. 

“Of course, Princessa.” He caves instantly. 

“Yay!” The kids both cheer.

“Can we have pizza?” Chris asks.

“No no. No peezza. Passaa.” Rose says, insisting on pasta over pizza.

“We can get both,” Buck assures them.

“We are so fucked.” Eddie whispers.

“I know.” Buck sighs.

That night, when they’re all sitting down to eat dinner again, Eddie gives Rosie more pasta while Buck is filling Chris’ cup with lemonade. The four of them are smiling and laughing while they talk and eat their food, and nothing has ever been better. 

Buck has never been happier in his entire life. 

When Buck and Eddie go back to work the next week, they both seem equally bummed at how fast their days off flew by. Rosie had had an entire meltdown the night before when Buck tried to explain to her that they all needed to sleep in their own houses that night so they could be ready for work and for school.

The kids had swindled all weekend, convincing the men to just trade off on houses so they could spend time together.

That also meant Rosie now already had a toddler bed at Eddie and that Buck rearranged his living room to add a futon that turns into a bed for Chris.

It also meant that Buck and Eddie had been sharing their own beds during that time. Which usually led to all four of them in one bed by the morning. Eddie would never admit it to nobody but sleeping alone in his bed the night before their shift felt awful. He tossed and turned all night and couldn't stay warm. Buck was equally miserable, but he had a toddler to blame his lack of sleep on. 

“Have you talked to Athena?” Eddie asks Buck quietly as he buttons up his shirt.

“She called after she texted to cancel. She felt awful, but I told her it was okay.” Buck explains.

“Was that it?” Eddie questions curiously, wondering if they spoke about Rose.

“Bobby definitely read my paperwork.” Buck sighs. “ I think Athena cried a little when we were talking about Rosie.”

“So now what?” Eddie looks at Buck, trying to keep his eyes locked on Buck. He fails a few times and has to look away.

“She said Nana Thena is going to need an introduction.” Buck fights with a smile that wins, and his face brightens. Eddie feels like he’s standing in the sun from the warmth that’s radiating from the man in front of him. 

“Yeah, that’s how I expected that to go.” Eddie chuckles. “Just wait til she meets our girl. She doesn’t stand a chance.” The two of them shuffle out of the locker room, fully ready for their shift. 

“No one really does.” Buck grins. 

“We’re in so much trouble.” Eddie sighs.

“Trouble from what?” Hen grins at the two of them, happy to see them together.

“Rosie girl has the most cutest pouty face.” Eddie gushes.

“And Eddie is a sucker.” Buck teases.

“Excuse me, Buckley. I think we’ve established this is a mutual problem here, hence the trouble.” Eddie grumbles, and Hen just watches the two of them fondly. 

“Okay, but you’re supposed to be the tough one,” Buck whines. “You’ve always been the more logical one!”

“I know Evan, but her face is just- what am I supposed to do? Disappoint her? Tell my Princessa no? No. Absolutely not. Not unless I HAVE to.”

“Wow,” Hen says, reminding them they’re not alone. 

“What?” Buck questions. 

“You guys are cute.” She says, stepping forward to pinch their cheeks once before turning away and shuffling upstairs.

“What do you think that was about?” Eddie asks as they watch her go. 

“I think we’re both suckers and even she knows it.” Buck chuckles before shooting Eddie a smile as he follows behind Hen. 

Their shift feels like a million years long. Buck is basically vibrating out of his boots during the last hour. Eddie is finally about to tell him to take a walk when cries enter the firehouse. Buck and Eddie shoot up instantly, knowing exactly who is crying. They’re shooting down the stairs when they hear Bobby calling out. 

“Buckley!”

“We’re here, Cap!” Buck and Eddie come racing around the corner of the engine only to be struck by what they’re met with. 

Rosie seems to be mid-meltdown with no end in sight as her nanny, Amanda, holds on to her. 

“W-what happened?” Buck asks nervously as they approach.

“She had a bad dream and just hasn’t stopped crying for you. I know you’re off soon, but it was just hurting my heart.”

“Dada!!” Rosie cries as she hyperventilates. 

“Hey, hey, babygirl. I’m right here.” Buck says as he swoops her into his arms. Rose tucks her face into his neck and takes a breath. “Shhh, I got you, baby.” 

“Dada.” Rosie cries softer as she clutches his shirt in her hands.

“I’m here, baby.” Buck sways with her as he holds her tight to his chest. 

“Papa Dee?” Rosie whimpers. Buck spins around until he catches Eddie’s eyes. 

“Eds,” Buck says, shooting his friend a worried look.

“Hi, babygirl,” Eddie says softly out loud as he gets closer to them. Rosie peaks out, so Buck moves so she can see where Eddie is.

“Papa Dee.” Her little lip wobbles, and Eddie feels like his heart is going to drop out of his ass.

“What’s wrong, Princessa?” Eddie asks as he steps in close to rub her back, not realizing that he places his other hand on Buck’s lower back to ground himself. 

“Dream bad, Papa,” Rosie whispers, her little voice coming out rough.

“I’m sorry, Babygirl. Bad dreams are mean, huh?” Eddie tells her before leaning in to kiss her head. Buck just holds her tight as she stays tucked under his chin. 

“You guys can head out now if you want,” Bobby tells them, reminding Buck of their audience.

Buck looks up, noticing Hen and Chimney huddled together, whispering with smiles on their faces. He looks at Bobby, who looks like he’s in physical pain. 

“Oh, we don’t-” Buck tries to reject Bobby’s suggestion only to be cut off.

“That sounds great, Cap.” Eddie shoots the older man a sympathetic smile. He can see the regret in Bobby’s eyes before he turns back to Rosie. “How’s that sound, babygirl? You wanna go home?”

“Togever?”

“Of course, Angel,” Eddie assures. 

“Kis too?”

“We can get Chris after school,” Buck tells her. Rosie whines. 

“Bruder.” She sniffles out, and Buck instantly shoots Eddie a worried look. 

“Brother has to go to school, sweet girl. Just like when you get big, too.” Eddie explains. “I promise he will be so excited to see you after school, though.”

“Ok, Papa.” Rosie sniffles before reaching out to Eddie. Buck passes her over easily, his heart lurching because his daughter is already so attached to his best friend. 

“I can grab our stuff if you want to get her buckled in?” Buck asks, shooting Eddie a nervous look. 

“We can take my truck, but you’re driving.” Eddie grins before turning to head to the parking lot. “Say bye babygirl.”

“Bye,” Rosie says out loud without paying attention to anyone. 

Buck doesn’t know how long he watches Eddie and his daughter go, but eventually Chim clears his throat. Buck feels his face flush when he catches the looks on everyone's faces. 

“I uhh-” Buck motions towards the lockers. “Yeah.” 

“So we saw that, right?” Hen says smugly. “That little dance they just did.” 

“I saw something for sure.” Chim chuckles. “I just have no idea what it was.” The two of them look over to see Bobby still staring at the spot where he watched Buck hold his daughter. They shoot each other a sad look before heading back to the kitchen. 

When Buck and Eddie pulled into Eddie’s driveway, Rose was sitting quietly in her seat. Her sniffles had almost immediately stopped when they told her they were going home, but her bubbly little personality is still subdued. Buck kept shooting worried glances at her in the mirror most of the drive. Only stopping when Eddie grasped his knee supportively. 

“We’re at Eddie’s, baby,” Buck tells his daughter as he throws the truck in park. 

“Papa’s.” Rosie corrects him. Eddie grins but attempts to hide it.

“Come on,” Buck says as he slips in the back to unbuckle her. Eddie grabs their stuff and unlocks the door before heading to the laundry room to throw their stuff in the wash. He changes quickly and then finds Buck and Rosie curled up on the couch, both blinking slowly. 

“Hey, hey lets move this cuddle puddle to my bed, or we older folk who use our bodies for work will wake up sore,” Eddie says softly, swooping Rosie up and turning back towards his room without another glance. He hears Buck shuffle behind them a moment later. Eddie pauses to snatch the teddy bear from Rosie’s bed, and then the three of them all go and pile into Eddie’s bed. Buck and Rosie are both snoring within minutes, and Eddie almost giggles. The two of them are like sleeping angels in his bed. His heart aches at the sight of them.

He’s just about to drift off when he feels his phone buzz. He checks it just to be safe and opens it to find a picture sent to the 118&CO group chat that's been long dormant. It’s of Buck, Rosie, and Eddie as Eddie leaned in to kiss her head. The picture is probably one of the cutest things he's ever seen in his life so he studies it. 

Rosie is so cute, even with a blotchy red face from crying. Eddie loves her eyes that are even more beautiful than her father’s eyes. Her father’s eyes that just so happen to be on Eddie in the picture. He might even have hearts in those eyes if Eddie isn’t mistaken, and it makes his heart beat a little faster. 

Buck is his best friend.

Life without Buck had been..lackluster.

Buck was the sun, and Eddie had been stuck in a miserable winter without him. Eddie's heart reacts to the pictures, but he doesn't reply. He thinks about it the entire time he lies there trying to sleep, and by the time he finally slips from consciousness, his last thought is that other than his son, no one has ever made him so happy. 

When Buck wakes up, his daughter has migrated to Eddie’s side of the bed. The two of them are smooshed together, sleeping with both their mouths wide open the same way. He immediately looks for his phone to snap a picture. He snaps it quickly before checking his notifications, only to be met with another picture waiting for him. 

Buck’s heart does somersaults looking at the three of them. He sees Eddie’s heart reaction and wonders how long it took the other man to fall asleep. He goes back to the chat to see all the follow-up messages to the picture. 

Buck can’t help but smile as he watches almost everyone gush over his daughter, but then he sees Karen’s message.

Karen: Oh my gosh! If only Chris were there, and then it would be a full family picture!

She follows her message up with a bunch of kissy faces and hearts, and Buck lets out a soft chuckle before noticing Eddie moving next to him. He wonders if everyone always just saw them as a unit, even when it was just a unit of three. 

His heart feels whole with their unit of four. 

“Hi,” Eddie whispers. Buck turns to smile at him softly.

“Hi,” Buck whispers back. 

“You see the picture?” Eddie nods towards Buck’s phone.

“I did.”

“What do you think?” Eddie’s voice wavers a bit. Only enough for Buck to notice. Other people would brush it off as something else, but Buck knows it’s nerves. 

“I think if Chris were in the picture, it would basically be a picture of my entire universe,” Buck admits. 

“Me too.” Eddie smiles softly before glancing down at Rosie. He shifts her onto his pillow before slipping out of his side of the bed. He offers his hand to Buck. 

“What’s this?” Buck asks, obviously amused as he takes Eddie’s hand. Eddie pulls him out of the room quickly.

“This is me wanting to kiss the love of my life, but not wanting to do it where our girl could wake up and make fun of us. She’s not even three, there's no way we can give her this kind of ammunition already.”

Eddie stops in the middle of the hall and turns to face Buck. It’s not often that their height difference is noticeable to Eddie, but as he looks up into Buck’s eyes, he feels a little smaller than he ever has before. 

“Are you sure?” Buck asks nervously. 

“So sure.”

Eddie captures Buck’s lips without a second thought. Buck sighs happily as he steps into Eddie’s space, closing all the distance between them. Buck kisses Eddie like it's the moment he’s been waiting for his entire life. Eddie kisses back, thankful for every moment that led them here. 

He knows that this is exactly where he’s meant to be.

This was always where he was meant to be.