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It’s another wonderful day in the Mathers Domain.
Flowers are blooming, nature in full spring. Up in the trees, red birds and blue birds furiously chirp at one another, distracted. Meanwhile the conniving crows, having instigated the conflict, are eating delicious omlettes made from the unguarded nest’s eggs which taste of cream cheese, while they themselves prostrate to the owls. Truly, nature is beautiful.
The Domain bustles with progress. Smokestacks churn out long plumes of smoke. From these smoke-stacks of industrial progress, on the wind there comes aluminum powder in the air and in the water. People become forgetful.
Progress is in the air. As is lots of dust. Said dust has prompted many a conversations about effective dust-cleaning methods, especially in the Miload Mansion situated downwind of Coostul. Specificially, Conversations between it’s resident not employed but very educated and trained spirit, Beatrice, and the logic-breaking black haired creature which calls it’s halls home, Natsuki Subaru.
The Miload Mansion is situated in the middle of this prosperous domain, just a few miles upwind from Coostul. On the Miload Manner’s property, there is a large field. On that field, can be found the two aforementioned.
Natsuki Subaru and Beatrice sit atop a picknick blanket. In their hands is a book. The sun is high but not oppressive, the heat is restrained by a remarkable wind. A few Zodda bugs buzz about. And the clouds are high.
“Subaru, Remember when you were talking about the “Vah-quoom?” Beatrice recalls.
“Yeah.”
“You said it had another meaning other than a mundane cleaning device, one that Betty would be interested in.”
“Oh yes. The Vacuum.” Subaru says. “I’ll tell you what it is.”
“Betty demands you tell me what it is.”
Subaru does not tell Betty what it is.
“Betty is indignant. Betty is furious. Betty demands that Betty’s Subaru explain at once. Betty swears she will Al Shamak you if you don’t!”
Subaru remains completely silent.
Betty scowls. Her Obsession with physics and knowledge is third only to her obsession to the book, and to Subaru henceforth after the destruction of said book.
“Subaru has commited an unforgivable crime, I suppose. I shall now render judgement.” She says.
“But why?” Subaru says. “I explained it to you!” He cries out with sadness just moments before he is turned into a John Kiriakou story.
“Betty’s Subaru said nothing. In fact.”
“Exactly.” Subaru says. “That is what a vacuum is.”
“…Nothing?” Betty ponders.
“Yes! Nothing!” Subaru says. “A Vacuum is any space devoid of matter and energy. A perfect Vacuum is at absolute zero, and has no mass what-so-ever!” Subaru says.
“Impossible. In fact. Everybody knows that all space contains ambient Mana.” She says. “Mana is what makes up our world. It is the building blocks, in fact.” She says. “The Six Different types of particles of Mana are what make up everything! Kashira!”
“Really?” Subaru ponders.
“Yes, In fact.”
“Well what If a region were to have all the mana forcibly sucked out of it?”
“Betty would surmise that mana from surrounding regions would rush in to fill it.”
“But what if it was blocked by say… EMT?”
Betty stops. A paperclip in her hands which she had been molding into many different shapes fell right out of it.”
“That could work.” She says. “Kashira.”
We now see the two intrepid particle physicists in a barn outside the estate.
Inside the barn there is a Mana-Recording equipment everywhere. In the center of the barn, there can be found a large thing-a-majig. It looks like the Gravity Drive from Event Horizon.
Wires enter into this contraption at every place imaginable. Dials and switches, fuses all about.
“…So you’re saying that in a vacuum, little particles and antiparticles spontaneously come into existence and destroy themselves? Fascinating. I suppose.”
“…And in places like Black Holes, those things your mother talked about constantly, that particle-antiparticle action can, over sexdexvexlexjillion years, evaporate the singularity entirely!”
Where on earth did Subaru learn physics? Blame the Kurgesagrt. Kurgaeasagt. Kurgan sat.
Kurgurt sapt
Kurt gurt sagt
Kirk gert sagt.
“…And this Higgs Boson… An episode of the simpsons really did predict it!?”
“Yup.” Subaru says. “a decade before the thing was found!”
Kurtzaurgeassagt.
“…So there are six Quark particles that make up all the matter in your world? How Strange indeed. There are six affinities in Betty’s world, then. Six is a number that is often found in this world.” She says.
“…That, and Six Sided shapes. Hexagons, Polar storms, but that’s elite ball knowledge and there is no way a cute little spirit like you should know of such things.”
“BETTY DEMANDS TO KNOW!”
Burt zurg zeg zact.
They spend a while talking about about the phylacteries.
Goodness gracious what the fuck are they doing.
“And Betty demands to know! Why did you shudder at the mention of the strange quark?”
“We don’t talk about the strange quark.”
“Why not?”
“It is like a cancer of quarks.” He explains. “Its so strange that it can turn other quarks into strange quarks as well.”
“What would happen if a “Strange Quark” were to be created here. Would we all become strange quarks?”
“Yes and we’d be dead instantly.”
“Not good I suppose.”
The Machine uses multiple different layers of magic-circle. Spells and Spell Circuits overlap one another. The Basic Logic Gates are codified into magic transitors. A new type of magic is being tested in this machine. It is called “Formulaic Magic”. It works using formulas. Formulaic Technology imbued with traditional magic circles to perform complex, sequenced activations of magic. With these new developments, courtesy of Roswaal’s industrial district, Subaru’s contraption now possesses limited calculative capabilities. A logic engine, built to calculate the complex formulae needed to create Vacuum with magic.
“Betty assumes this massive contraption wont be a waste of money?”
“Yes. My Little Spirit.” Subaru says. “The practical applications of studying Vacuums in this world will be amazing. Imagine a spell which could remove all the mana from a person’s od. Imagine a spell that could remotely create a vacuum in their gate! We could stop mages before they could even cast!”
Subaru looks at the mansion from a window in the barn. The Clown is there and he is evil and bad and no good and he is scheming with evil eyes and a curly nose and long ears and he loves greedy witches and he has evil plans to kill god and take god’s blood to resurrect evil witches so that he may crack.
Or so the rumors say.
"I Shall name it the Dyson Machine!" Subaru says. "It sounds cool." He adds. "It sounds stupid, I suppose." Beako counterargues.
The Thingamajig is now named the “Dyson Machine.” In honor of the vacuum brand.
The plan is simple. Make Vacuum, put two plates inside the vacuum. Put the plates together and see if they move.
Subaru can already see the paper. [ABSTRACT: IN MANA-DEPRIVED ENVIRONMENTS, PARTICLES AND ANTIPARTICLES FORM AND ANNHILATE ONE ANOTHER.].
The Reason Subaru is making this bizarre contraption is to spite the clown, who had once said: “You burned down by library. I will forgive you, but only if you create some knowledge that was not found there-in before. You have as much budget as you need. Do something interesting.”
Truth be told. Roswaal was bored. He had lost the most important duel of his life just a few weeks before, but now he was bored.
Priorities, Am I right?
The Day of the great experiment was nearing.
The Barn filled with researchers from the Royal Institute of Magic, all eager to see the bizzare contraption. Any critics were silenced by Betty. Subaru did the marketing.
He promised wild things like “Instantaneous communication via Coupled Particles.” And “Practical applications.” Subaru was lying. Practical applications were ten thousand years away.
The Day had arrived.
“…Calibrations, complete.” Subaru said.
“…Detectors activated.” Betty said.
“This thing looks reaaaaaaaally evil.” Emilia said.
“Cap. Is this what you’ve been working on?” Garfield asked. “It looks like that one girl’s Morningstar!”
“Natsuki-san, What the fuck did you create?”
“This is science. Otto.”
“This is madness. Why did you give it spikes?”
“Aesthetics.”
“My Myyyyyyy~ How Biizzzaaaarreee~.” Roswaal said. “The Freeloader aaactually did something with his life. Thissss alone is more surprising thaaan~ anything you could’ve made.”
Betty says. “Begone, Homosexual Clown.”
Roswaal responds. “Uwah~~~ You heart my feelings~”
Otto is flabbergasted for a moment. “Wait that makes a lot of sense. Wait a— So that’s why you act that way?”
Roswaal smiles at Otto but his eyes say: “BLACK FORD LUGUNICAN DRAGON-CART EXPLORERS WILL APPEAR AT YOUR FAMILY’S HOUSE AND WILL GANGSTALK THEM UNTIL THEY FALL OUT OF A WINDOW OR HAVE A HEART ATTACK.” Or something along those lines.
Subaru takes two electrical cords, an inlet and and outlet, and brings them together over his head, creating an electric flash.
“Let There Be Light!” He says as all the dials switch on.
The Machine is now warming up.
“This will be incredible. In Fact.”
The Air is sucked out by one spell. The EMT Activates. The Mana Sequestration magic circles activate.
Subaru raises his hand to celebrate. “Today marks the day we shall prove the existence of Subatomic Particles to the world!”
Betty adds on. “Betty made sure to turn the dials all the way up on the Mana-Extraction sigils. In fact, In accordance with Subaru’s theories, Betty believes she may be able to create an entirely new level of Vacuum, even more Vacuum that Vacuum!” She Smugly says.
“Exactly!” Subaru says “Wait what did you just say—"
