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It should be a sin, really, a mouth shouldn't feel so good against her skin. Hands shouldn’t be able to make her forget her duty, her loyalties, her Emperor, and yet… and yet, with each touch, each kiss from Coronabeth Tridentarius, Judith Deuteros found herself hopelessly wishing the Empire had never existed.
Maybe it was a sin.
She doesn’t know how it started, one moment she was alone in the bathroom of the little apartament she shared with Coronabeth - Camilla had other business to attend and now it was only the two of them - and the next thing she knew her back was pressed against the cold sink and the princess was distributing open mouth kisses all over her body.
Well, maybe things didn’t start so abruptly but, in her defense, Judith was having a really hard time keeping her composure, as well as her train of thought.
It really started in the bathroom, though. It was early in the morning and, because Corona had stayed until very late having secret meetings with BOE operatives, the former captain thought the princess would be asleep for at least a couple of hours more and therefore she could safely do her weekly body inspection (so safe she even forgot to close the door). Not that there was much body to be inspected, even after the lyctor’s intervention her recovery had been difficult and she was having a hard time gaining back the weight she lost. That was the inspection, she would spend a few minutes staring at her pathetic, ridiculously thin body, the scars that now covered her stomach and abdomen and she would allow herself a moment to grieve.
It wasn’t self pity, it really wasn’t. Alone, feeling the cold tiles under her feet, wearing only a top and underwear she would grieve everything -everyone- she’d lost. She would stare at her frail image in the mirror and promise herself once again to gather her strengths and fight back. She was a soldier after all, a captain. Or at least, she used to be.
She raised her eyes from her abdomen to her face in the mirror and startled with the image of Coronabeth Tridentarius leaning at the door frame behind her back. The sight made Judith’s inside twist and her heart forget a leap, even after all these months she couldn’t get used to the vision of the princess of Ida freshly woken up. Her gorgeous hair in messy curls, the wrinkled clothes that insisted to fit her as well as tailored suits - even though it was just sweeter pants and a tank top-, the cutest sleepy expression in the whole universe.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you” the princess’ voice was still a little rough from sleep but her eyes were as awake as ever.
“Don’t be, I just thought you were asleep” Judith said, turning to face Corona and fighting the urge to cover her body with her hands, she would not let the other woman realize how embarrassed she really was.
It wasn’t just the fact that she was half naked in front of Coronabeth Tridentarius, it was also the stark contrast between them. While Judith felt her body sick and pathetic, Coronabeth’s looked almost like something God himself took his time to sculpt. She looked as strong, competent and healthy as ever. And, if Judith was being really honest to herself, the princess’ arms were going to be the end of her.
“What are you doing?”
“Looking for all the weight I lost” her attempt to joke felt weak even for her ears, she never was the best at playful interactions, and the other woman’s presence made her too tense to play.
“Hum…” was Corona’s only response as she entered the bathroom and approached Judith, stopping only a step away from her “What’s wrong Jody? You know you can talk to me, right?”
“Nothing is wrong, I’m recovered, I’m healthy, nothing’s wrong”
“And yet…”
Maybe was the gentle expression, maybe was the proximity to the princess making her head spin a little but Jody found herself saying
“I’m hardly the model of the cohort soldier anymore, even for necromancer’s standards”
“Translation please, Jody. Unlike you I didn’t grew up in headquarters”
“I need to get my strength back. I look weak and frail, I’m a sorry sight.” The former captain snapped at the princess’ playful tone
“Well, I’m not sorry”
“What?”
“I said I’m not sorry” the princess stepped even closer, now dead serious. “If you are in pain and worried for your health I promise you I will do everything in my power to help you, but… If you your only concern is about how you may look to others, well, I’m sighting you right now and I guarantee you I’m not even a little bit sorry”
Coronabeth was so close that Judith could feel her warm irradiating from her body
“Well?” the blond woman said waiting for an answer
“My health is fine. Thank you for your concern, Your Highness” was all that she managed to say with a shaky breath, desperately trying to regain a little control over the situation. By the small smile that started to spread through Corona’s lips, she wasn’t being particularly effective.
“Always so cold, Jody” she said, shaking her head in feigned disappointment and continued “So, you are worried about the way you look?”
The captain was worried, but only because she was the only cohort official on the planet - she had the Empire’s reputation to maintain - but something in the way the princess said made her blush and she didn’t trust herself enough to speak.
The princess took the silence as a confirmation and went on
“Is there someone’s particular opinion that worries you most?” again Judith couldn’t speak, she only stood there blushing furiously as a traitor's little voice inside her head said ‘Yes’. Unfortunately for her, despite the silence, Corona noticed the blushing and continued on with a wicked grin
“Should I be jealous?”
The question made her body tense up. She should get out of there in that exact instant. Corona was close but she knew she could leave at any moment, and she would do it, right now, before she did anything stupid like…
"Jealousy infers interest” she physically recoiled from her words, looking down at her own feet, how could she face the princess? She knew she couldn’t be trusted around Corona, and after all these months it was getting harder and harder to refrain herself from doing -saying- stupid things. But that was fucking ridiculous.
She braced herself for the laugh, for the mockery, but instead she felt gentle fingers lifting her face by her chin and found open, serious eyes facing her.
“Yes, yes it does”
Coronabeth slowly approached, only stopping when her lips were almost touching Judith’s, and waited for the other woman to close the gap. Judith wanted to scream, to run away, to be anywhere but there but before she could make up her mind, her body took matters on its own, and she found herself kissing the princess of Ida as if her life depended on it.
Maybe it did.
She didn't care, not anymore. Not while Corona gently cupped her cheek with one hand and held her by the waist with the other. Not when the kiss was sweet, and sharp, and eager, and desperate. Not when she finally discovered that Coronabeth’s arms were even better to touch than to look from afar.
When they broke up, gasping for air, Coronabeth’s focus switched to her jaw, and earlobe, and neck, and collarbone, and -before Jody could even understand what was happening- her top was already forgotten on the bathroom’s floor and Corona’s mouth was on her left breast. She couldn’t have fought her moan if she tried.
The princess kissed her breasts with deliberate care but didn’t stop there. Next was the stomach and abdomen, where the scars that covered her skin were kissed with something so very close to reverence that it took everything to Judith not to cry.
She opened her eyes to find the princess on her knees, kissing her softly through the thin fabric of her underwear.
“No, please. Stop” Judith managed to say with a shaking breath
“What? Something is wrong?”
“No, nothing is wrong, it’s just-”
“You don’t want this?” Coronabeth was back on her feet, cupping Jody’s face with both hands and desperately looking for something in her eyes
“NO! It’s not that” She took a deep breath, leaning slightly on Corona’s touch “It’s just- It feels wrong to have you on your knees for me. You are royalty, a princess, a-”
“A King?”
“Yes. And I- well, I can’t even call myself a captain anymore. I’m not worth it”
“a King shouldn’t be allowed to choose their own religion?” Coronabeth spoke softly, almost as if she was talking to herself
“What?”
“Nothing, just… just don’t reject me again, Jody. I don’t think I can take it, not again. Please.”
Once again Coronabeth Tridentrius looked eager, and afraid, and - yes- beautiful. Just like that day, months ago when she asked Judith to be her cavalier. But now, looking at mesmerizing eyes, swollen lips, the adorable flush that covered her chest, face, up to the tip of her ears Judith knew she wouldn’t be able to deny the princess a single request. She would kill the Emperor himself with her bare hands if it meant that the object of her most secret desires would stop looking so- so heartbroken…
“I won't” her voice was barely a whisper but she nodded and Corona was back on her knees, tossing Jody’s underwear aside like it had somehow offended her.
She quickly kissed the inside of Judith’s right thigh one time, raising her eyes to give a playfully wink before placing her mouth where the former captain needed the most.
All Judith could focus was Corona. Corona’s lips, teeth, tongue. Corona’s moans. Corona’s hair, so soft as she clinged to them for her life. Corona’s hands and arms steadying her, holding her weight. Her legs had given up working, she was reduced to a wet, desperate mess that desired Corona. Yes, she desired Corona. She wanted her, she has wanted her for most part of her life, and would continue to want her even after she died. She wanted Corona to be her cavalier, wanted to be one flesh one end with her. She wanted to consume and be consumed by her. All she could think of was Corona, Corona, Corona.
Jodith came and it felt like a knot finaly losening inside her heart after twelve long stupid fruitless years. She screamed something that sounded a lot like “Coronabeth”, sounded a lot like “my love”.
Corona stayed with her until she managed to remember her own name again, not letting go for even one second as raised to her feet again, kissing Jody in the mouth. The cavalier kissed slowly, deliberately, passionately and the necromancer moaned when she tasted herself in the kiss.
They broke apart and stood there, in each other's arms, foreheads pressed, swaying a little in the cold floor of a tiny bathroom, on an insignificant planet at the edge of the universe.
Then the Crown Princess of Ida, Coronabeth Tridentarius whispered like a promise, like a prayer:
“Jody, my Jody, listen to me! Stop measuring yourself by other people's expectations. Forget about them. They are the past, they might as well be dead, some of them are. Let them burn and be buried, let them be forgotten. All of them: BOE, Empire, cavs and necros and lyctors and their stupid rules and taboos. They don't matter. You and me, we are the only ones that matter. Do you hear me, Jody? Listen to me: you are the only thing in this whole universe worth adoration!”