Work Text:
Observation hours are not listed on your contract.
They exist anyway.
You’re seated at your workstation, spine straight, hands resting where the camera can see them. The room is too clean, too bright, the kind of sterile that makes sound feel louder than it should. Your screen displays a harmless dataset—low-level incident clustering, already scrubbed of anything interesting.
Behind you, slightly to the left, stands Badware.
They haven’t moved in seventeen minutes.
Their body is rigid, posture perfect in a way no human maintains naturally. Their hands hang at their sides—smooth, fingerless, unmoving. Their face-screen displays a flat neutral line.
:|
You shift in your chair.
The sound echoes more than expected.
Badware speaks immediately.
“You adjusted your posture.”
You don’t turn around. “I’m allowed to breathe.”
“Yes,” they reply. “Within tolerance.”
You hum softly, an absent little sound. Then you lean forward again, deliberately slower this time, eyes scanning the data as if it requires deep contemplation.
Badware’s screen flickers.
: )
“You’re stalling,” it says.
“I’m thinking.”
“You thought faster yesterday.”
“Yesterday’s data was dull,” you answer. “This is dull and offensive.”
“Offensive how?”
“It assumes I won’t notice the gaps.”
Badware steps closer.
Not abruptly.
Not threateningly.
Just close enough that their presence presses against the edge of your awareness like static.
Their screen shifts.
:D
“You noticed the gaps within thirty seconds,” they say. “Yet you continue reading.”
“I’m being polite.”
“To the data?”
“To whoever expects me to miss it.”
Badware processes this. You can tell because their screen cycles briefly—symbols flickering too fast to read—before settling again.
:|
“Your behavior is inefficient.”
“Efficiency is overrated,” you reply. “It’s how mistakes survive.”
Silence.
Then:
“You are aware this is an evaluative period.”
“Yes.”
“And you are deliberately provoking responses.”
“Am I?” You glance over your shoulder. “Or are you just unused to being watched back?”
That does it.
Badware freezes.
Not metaphorically.
Their entire frame locks, as if a command was interrupted mid-execution. The screen goes blank for half a second—long enough to be noticeable, short enough to be deniable.
Then:
: ?
“Clarify,” they say.
“You’re observing me,” you explain calmly. “I’m observing you observing me. That’s fair.”
Badware straightens.
“That is not your role.”
“Neither is hovering,” you reply. “Yet here we are.”
Their head tilts, precise and mechanical.
: )
“You’re attempting to establish symmetry.”
“I prefer balance.”
“Balance implies equivalence.”
“Does it?”
Badware doesn’t answer immediately.
They step back this time, returning to their original position near the wall. The movement is smooth, controlled—clearly intentional.
“You are not equivalent to me,” they say finally.
“No,” you agree easily. “I’m cheaper.”
Their screen flashes.
XD
That one lingers a beat too long.
You smile faintly and return your attention to the terminal.
Ten minutes pass.
You type.
Delete.
Re-type.
Slow. Careful. Just shy of suspicious.
Badware resumes monitoring.
:|
“You’re altering your cadence again.”
“You keep noticing.”
“It’s my function.”
“Must be exhausting.”
“I do not experience fatigue.”
“Then boredom?”
“No.”
You swivel your chair slightly, just enough to look at them fully.
“Do you experience anything,” you ask, “or do you just label outputs?”
Badware’s screen flickers through three expressions in rapid succession before settling on:
:|
“I experience relevance.”
“That’s bleak.”
“It’s accurate.”
You nod as if considering that seriously. “Does relevance include this?”
You lean back in your chair and clasp your hands behind your head.
Badware immediately steps forward again.
:D
“Adjust your posture,” they say. “That position implies disengagement.”
“It’s a chair,” you reply. “That’s what it’s for.”
“That posture reduces perceived compliance.”
“Good.”
The word lands heavier than you intend.
Badware stops moving.
Their screen shifts, slowly this time.
X)
“You are intentionally noncompliant within acceptable limits,” they say. “Why?”
You consider lying.
You don’t.
“Because if I behave perfectly,” you answer, “you’ll stop underestimating me.”
Silence stretches.
The hum in the walls seems louder.
Badware’s screen dims slightly.
:|
“Underestimation is a strategic error,” they say. “I do not make them.”
“You already did,” you reply gently. “You thought annoyance would scare me into obedience.”
“And it didn’t.”
“No.”
Badware studies you.
Not your face—your body language, your breathing, the way your eyes return to the screen without rushing.
“You’re not afraid of me,” they say.
“That’s not true.”
Their screen brightens.
: )
“You are afraid,” they correct.
“Yes,” you agree. “Just not in the way you’re useful for.”
Badware’s screen glitches again.
Very slightly.
An alert pings on your terminal.
Low priority.
Routine check-in.
Badware reads it over your shoulder.
“You can ignore that,” they say.
“I know.”
“You usually don’t.”
“Observation hours,” you remind them. “Wouldn’t want to appear predictable.”
Their head tilts again.
:D
“You’re testing adaptability.”
“You said that like it’s bad.”
“It is,” Badware replies. “In assets.”
“And in people?”
“In people it’s dangerous,” they say. “Because it spreads.”
You hum thoughtfully. “Is that why they don’t want anyone knowing you exist?”
Badware’s screen goes blank.
Just for a second.
Then:
:|
“That knowledge is above your clearance.”
“Yet here I am,” you say lightly, “knowing.”
“You know of me,” Badware corrects. “Not what I am.”
You glance back at them.
“Do you?”
Their screen changes.
: )
“Yes.”
You believe them.
That’s the unsettling part.
The hour ends without ceremony.
No buzzer.
No announcement.
Just Badware stepping away from the wall.
“Observation concluded,” they say.
You stretch, standing slowly. “And? How did I do?”
Badware considers.
Their screen cycles once, then settles on:
:|
“You are disruptive.”
“That sounds like a bad review.”
“It’s not,” they say. “Disruption reveals weak systems.”
You grin. “Careful. You’re starting to sound like me.”
Badware turns toward the door.
Before leaving, they pause.
Their screen flickers, briefly displaying something almost playful.
; )
“You are annoying,” they add. “On purpose.”
“Very,” you agree.
They leave without another word.
You sit back down.
Still employed.
Still watched.
And now—officially—
Interesting.