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There’s a break between calls when Eddie’s phone rings. It’s Buck.
“Hey.”
“Hey, Eddie.” He sounds exhausted, Eddie chest squeezes knowing how much pain his best friend is in. “How’s the shift? Any interesting calls?”
“No, pretty tame. Saving all the wild ones for when you’re back. How are you?”
“Good. Fine. Haven’t been sleeping.”
“Want me and Chris to spend the night?” Eddie asks before letting himself think too much about it. He wanted to be there for Buck in any way he was needed.
“Really? You’d do that?” Buck’s voice has that hint of light that it normally has. Eddie knows he made the right choice. Anything to bring his sunlight back.
“We’ll be there at 7pm.”
…
Buck and Chris had gone off to bed about an hour ago, but Eddie, the protector he is, couldn’t sleep. He had to make sure that Buck was okay. He kept himself sane so far by doing an old crossword puzzle but he had finished it and now was antsy to check on his other half. He felt like a creep as he slowly made his way down Buck’s hallway. He moves swiftly to Buck’s open door, resting against it as he sees him laying there peacefully. Dread fills his stomach as he thinks about how still he is. Eddie takes a step further into the room. He can't-Eddie's brain tells him to leave but his legs are moving towards Buck, towards his pulse point. Buck is on his back, arm out and easily accessible for Eddie to quickly check.
Eddie lets out a relieved sigh when he feels the familiar thump of his pulse.
“Thank god.” He mutters.
“Eds?” Buck’s eyes are barely open. “What are you doing?” Eddie realizes how weird this must look, him kneeling on the floor next to Buck’s bed, head on his arm while his hand is tight around Buck’s wrist.
“Nothing, just checking on my patient.” Eddie chuckles, trying to make the room feel lighter.
“I’m okay, Eds. I promise.”
“I know, I just-Buck-”
“What?”
“I’ve never been more scared in my life.”
“Of what?”
“Of losing you, losing us. I don’t want to imagine a life where you’re not next to me. We’ve had too many close calls recently. I’m just scared.” Eddie holds back a sob.
“Eddie. Hey.” Buck shifts to sit up in his bed, Eddie lets go of his wrist but Buck in turn takes Eddie’s hand in his. “I’m here. We’re both here. Don’t worry about the what ifs. I’m alive, that’s all that matters.”
“Yeah.”
“Hey, come here.” Buck moves over in his bed, pulling back the covers to let Eddie get in next to him. He hesitates before Buck gives him his famous puppy dog eyes no one can turn down.
Eddie crawls into the bed, engulfed by warmth and the scent of Buck. All of his problems seem to fade. Buck brings an arm around Eddie, pulling him into a sideways hug.
They fall asleep wrapped up in each other's arms.
When Eddie wakes up the first thing he notices is the large body laying opposite of him. Buck is on his side facing Eddie. The second thing he notices is the fact his fingers are once again on Buck’s pulse point. Third, Buck looks incredibly adorable when he sleeps. Eddie’s eyes roam over every part of Buck that’s visible. His curls lay across his forehead and Eddie feels an urge to brush them out of the way. Eddie wants nothing more than to move closer to Buck, for his head to find a home in the crook of his neck.
Reluctantly, he pulls himself out of the bed, leaving behind the warmth and his Buck.
His Buck. Eddie doesn’t dwell on that thought because as he turns the corner towards the living room he’s greeted by his son who is very much awake. His hand goes to his heart.
“Chris, you scared me!”
“Why are you coming out of Buck’s room?”
“Oh, um.”
“Are you dating?”
“What, Chris. He’s not-I’m not-No-um, I was helping him, making sure he was sleeping okay after everything.” Eddie takes a seat at the table with his son. “Why would you think we were dating?”
“You slept in his room. That’s what people who are dating do.”
“How would you know that?” Eddie teases, before his face turns serious again. “Would it bother you?”
“Would what bother me?”
“If Buck and I were dating. Would it bother you?”
“No. I love Buck. I like him better than anyone you’ve dated. You are happy with him. And that means I would get two dads. Everyone would be so jealous.”
“Yeah?” Eddie’s heart pounds, not from fear, but hope.
“Morning!” Buck comes into the kitchen looking happier and more awake than he has in weeks.
“Buck!” Chris smiles, matching Buck’s own grin. Before Eddie is aware, he’s moving towards Buck. He wraps his arms around his best friend before he can think twice. Buck brings his arms around Eddie immediately, squeezing back. Eddie doesn’t know why he’s never thought about why hugging Buck feels like coming home. Never thought about why that smile made him feel safe. Why he trusted him with his son more than he trusted himself sometimes.
It’s always been Buck. It never could be anyone else.
“Ew, get a room.” Chris states making Buck laugh.
“What, you want a hug too?” Buck grins wickedly, grabbing the 15 year old into a hug. He complains and tries to get away but it’s no use. Eddie laughs at the scene.
He won’t tell Buck what he’s feeling yet. He will wait until Buck is in a better place. He wants to do it right. He has forever with Buck, what’s a few more weeks?