Chapter Text
2:41 PM
meowmo_puddingᓚᘏᗢ:
What are we watching? (2:41 PM)
DoolSetNet!:
Spirited away ok? (2:42 PM)
meowmo_puddingᓚᘏᗢ:
Yeah, like that one (2:42pm)
I like all of em actually (2:42PM)
DoolSetNet!:
Haha same (2:43 PM)
I love studio ghibli (2:43 PM)
Shld I call? (2:43 PM)
meowomo_puddingᓚᘏᗢ:
You were the one who suggested it soo (2:44 PM)
DoolSetNet!:
OK! (2:44 PM)
Let me just get stuff ready (2:45 PM)
u shld get snacks while u wait! (2:45 PM)
meowmo_puddingᓚᘏᗢ:
surw (2:45 PM)
Minho gets up from where he was sat on the kitchen floor, his stomach growling at the mention of snacks. Snacks he won't be getting because he promised Felix he'd eat real food after skipping breakfast today, and it's past lunch and he has yet to fulfill that promise.
So he places his phone on the counter heads over to his pantry, opening the doors and immediately zeroing in on the pack of spicy ramen. He grabs the pack and opens it, pointedly avoiding the left side of his pantry where he knows the snacks he'll get in place of actual food if he so much as glances in that direction is. He takes two packets out of the six-pack before placing the rest back on the shelf and leaving the pantry, closing the doors behind him before Soonie can sneak in. The cat meows in protest and sits at Minho's feet. He huffs and crouches down to pet him. "Greedy thing, it's barely been an hour since I fed you." Soonie meows, leaning into Minho's touch before leaving after realizing Minho won't be giving him anything other than pets. "Spoiled." He mutters fondly as he straightens up to prepare his ramen.
It's been long enough for Minho to make his ramen, ice coffee and set up his laptop, and Jisung has yet to call him. He was staring to get worried and overthink, before he could really get lost in his head, the unfamiliar ringtone of a discord call filled his ears. Pushing away those thoughts and the little confusion on the relief that washed over him when he saw the "Incoming call" in their chat, a small smile tugging at his lips as he picks up.
Jisung feels kind of bad for suggesting to do this and offering to call Minho instead of the other way around, and then making Minho wait for an unreasonable amount of time after he'd already set everything up and got his own snacks. The guilt of having him wait for a long enough time that Minho probably wondered if they'd still be doing this and decided Jisung was probably joking, outweighed his anxiety and overthinking. Which is why he was surprised when the call rang for barely two seconds before Minho picked up, and not wanting to be a bigger jerk and make him wait longer, he rushed out a quick "H-hey!" And winced at how high and obviously anxious his voice sounded, but before he could rush out an apology for making him wait and start an anxious ramble about how they don't have to do this anymore if Minho decided to back out for whatever reason, his mind went blank at the soft and slightly hesitant voice that cuts through.
"H-hello, Han-ah.."
The silence that follows stretches out long enough for Minho to panic. Was he not supposed to say anything? He didn't even mean to, it just slipped out without even thinking about it. He made a mistake, didn't he? He didn't even tell Jisung if he'd say anything at all, didn't ask if he'd be ok with hearing Minho's voice. He even told Minho to just text if he did have anything to say, told Minho he could just mute. He never said anything about Minho talking.
Jisung wouldn't mind though, right? He never said Minho couldn't talk if he wanted to and Jisung is nice. So, why wasn't he saying anything? Just as regret crawled up his throat and he went to type out on his laptop that he didn't mean to say anything, Jisung let out a breath on the other line before he spoke up again.
"Jisung."
"W-what?"
"Jisung's fine, hyung"
There was a moment of silence and Jisung thought maybe he should've just kept his mouth shut, but then-
"O-oh... Uhm.."
Right. Minho said he had talking problems and needed a moment sometimes, or was it all the time? Jisung can't think properly right now, he'll reread their chats later.
"H-hello, Jisung-ah?"
Jisung hummed out. "Yeah, hello, Minho-hyung"
Jisung's voice was softer, he sounded much more relaxed than when he gave a rushed greeting after Minho answered the call. And he was, how could he not be after hearing Minho's voice? Soft, smooth, and somehow the perfect pitch, he can't help but wonder what he'd sound like singing.
He wonders if already telling him to use his first name was a bit much, but he couldn't help it. He'll be damned if he lets Minho call him by his last name with such a perfect voice. Maybe that's a little selfish, but so what? Chan has been telling him to ignore his thoughts and go after what he wants, but he guesses this isn't exactly what his hyung had in mind when he told him those words. Then he remembers the reason for this call, to cheer up and watch Spirited away to get both their minds of all the feelings from the previous conversation in the group chat.
"Right, so uhm.. S-Spirited away? Got your snacks?"
"Hm, meal."
"You've got food instead of snacks?"
"Mhm."
"Ok then! I'm gonna share my screen now, ok?"
"Okay."
And after a moment, Jisung shared his screen and Minho tapped into it. Just like Jisung said, he made a comment every five minutes about what was happening, the characters, their choices, and just about anything really.
Usually Minho didn't like having any sort of interruption during whatever he was watching, even if he didn't like what was on screen, Felix being an exception some times (and his cats all the time, obviously) . Yet here he was, tentatively listening to everything Jisung had to say, nodding along and then remembering Jisung can't see him and letting out a short hum, smiling throughout it all.
Normally Minho didn't like when people talked while watching something and he'd give them a look or tell them to shut up. It's why he doesn't go to movie theateres, but he couldn't find a single reason to tell Jisung to stop talking, couldn't think of anything other than how much he's enjoying watching this movie and every little thing Jisung has to say. He's not sure how to feel about this, not sure what to do with this sudden change, so he ignores it for now and pushes to the back of his mind. He can dwell on everything when he's not on a call with the source of all these new feelings and sudden changes in himself, he'd much rather focus on the movie and every thought Jisung has about everything.
A little over halfway through the movie, Jisung's words are cut off by a soft meow on Minho's end, which is then followed by some rustling and Minho's own little meow. Jisung nearly loses his shit, but he bites his lip and shuts his eyes to control the urge to squeal and coo at Minho as he continues to make sounds at his cat and occasionally meow back. Then there's purring and what he assumes is Minho tapping his fingers on the bed to call another cat up? That question is quickly answered as Minho giggles at another meow, the purring doubling a moment later. Did he have multiple cats? He'll ask about Minho's pets later when his brain starts working again.
Neither of them notices the silence that fell between them, the movie continuing on in the background as Minho pets Soonie and Dori with a little smile on his lips as he continues watching, and Jisung grinning at nothing in particular as he stares at his screen, paying more attention to the purring on the other end and replaying Minho's little noises, completely forgetting about the movie he was supposed to be watching. It's not until a couple minutes later Minho thinks "I wonder what Jisungie thinks about this" that he realizes Jisung's stopped talking, that he's been quiet for a while now. Then he realizes exactly when he fell quiet and freezes up.
Jisung heard him.
He heard him make weird little noises, heard him fucking meow at his cats. He's probably weirded out, stopped talking because he doesn't know what to say or how to act. He probably made Jisung uncomfortable and now he won't want to talk to Minho ever again. The movies gonna end and he's gonna say bye, end the call and interact with Minho as little as possible in the group chat after blocking him. He'll probably tell Chan and Changbin and they'll never want to talk to him again too.
His throat closes up as he gets lost in his thoughts, a cocktail of negative emotions brewing in his chest and he can't understand why he cares so much about what Jisung thinks. He's so lost in his head he doesn't notice the movies over, doesn't notice Jisung stopped sharing his screen, doesn't notice the silence that continues after is stretched long enough for Jisung to notice something.
And notice Jisung did, as well as grow concerned. When Minho doesn't respond to his text, Jisung's concern grows tenfold. He was pulled out of his head when he realized the cats stopped purring, assuming they probably fell asleep. Then he realized he fell silent after Minho's interaction with his cats and cleared his throat before apologizing and then saying something about the cats, to which he got no response.
So he stayed quiet through the rest of the movie, figuring Minho wanted it, which is why he sent him a text to let him know he's going to stop sharing his screen, and still no response. Then he asked if everything was ok, still nothing. Jisung decides if something is wrong, maybe saying something would be better than a text seeing as Minho didn't hang up.
"Hyung?"
Nothing.
"Minho-hyung?"
Still no response.
"Hyung, seriously. Please, I'm getting worried."
Still nothing. Jisung huffs and opens his mouth to say something again when he hears a meow. After a moment there's another meow before he hears Minho hum out. He doesn't think he's ever let out a sigh this relieved in his life.
"Hyungie, are you back with me? Are you okay now?"
"Hm.. mhm."
"Words, hyung, please? Take your time, I just.. I need to hear you're ok.. or read? If talking's too much right now, text me. Please?"
Minho feels like he could cry (another thing to add to his list of "Jisung's confusing influence on me" because Minho rarely feels like he could cry, especially so easily), he feels bad for ever thinking the things he thought about Jisung during his spiral, because Jisung is so nice it hurts. He didn't hang up after the movie, he didn't say anything and first messaged Minho (which he's just seeing), then he checked in verbally, and now he's not pushing Minho to respond and immediately say something to him. Not pushing him to speak at all.
He told Minho to take his time, he's waiting for Minho to process and formulate a response. Told Minho to text him if he can't talk because he remembers Minho struggles to talk sometimes and doesn't care, he's not bothered or annoyed. In fact, there wasn't a single hint of annoyance or impatience at Minho's lack of response when he asked, just genuine concern. Concern Minho doesn't think he deserves after the assumptions he made about Jisung's silence. How could he even do that? Minho goes silent all the time, randomly too, sometimes there isn't even a reason other than simply wanting silence. What if that's all Jisung wanted and the timing was just a coincidence? God, he feels like such a jerk now.
Jisung's so considerate and patient with Minho, he's not sure how long that will last so he needs to speak. He ignores the way the thought of talking right now overwhelms him, how his throat constricts at the thought, ignores how his brain screams at him to just send a text because jisung will understand. He doesn't know how long Jisung's understanding will last, he needs Jisung to stick around as long as possible.
So, he swallows the lump in his throat and blinks to get rid of the sting in his eyes before screwing them shut and forcing his vocal cords to work despite nausea gnawing at his throat because of it.
"S-sorry.."
"No, it's ok. No need for that, ok? Just breathe and take your time, no rush. I'm not going anywhere, ok?"
"O-ok... Uhm.. I'm... o-okay, I just.. g-got lost in.. my head.. s-sorry."
"Hey, no, that's ok. No need to be sorry, I get it. Sometimes thoughts are too loud to ignore and you get swept up, hm?"
"Hm.."
"Wanna talk about it?"
"N-no. sorry."
"What I just say, hm? No need to say sorry, it's ok, hyung. We don't need to talk to about it, it's none of my business and I don't wanna know unless you want me to, yeah?"
Seriously, Minho thinks he could cry. What did he to deserve this? First Felix comes into his life, then the groups nice words and now Jisung too?
"Mhm.."
"Actual words, hyungie, please. O-only if you can!"
"Y-yeah."
"That's good, you did good, hyungie. Thank you for-"
Minho's not sure how's he's supposed to react to or feel about that, but he knows the fluttering in his stomach and heat at the tips of his ears definitely isn't the response he should be having to that. Especially not in this context, not when Jisung was just saying it to probably encourage him and give some sort of cheer for Minho responding with words when he was clearly struggling to speak.
"-nd need a break? We can just sit in silence until you wanna say or do something, I don't know."
"Hm?.. ah.. uh, b-break?"
"Yeah, ok. Just let me me know if you wanna talk, or text, or.. I don't know, something."
That's not what Minho meant, he didn't hear most of what Jisung said and was confused on what he was talking about with the break, but because he pushed himself too much words were failing him and he couldn't muster up the energy for anything but a hum or some sort of sound in response, so he just agreed.
"Mhm."
Not even a minute later Minho's regretting blindly agreeing to this break (that's apparently just to sit in silence) because now he has no choice but to think about the way Jisung's innocent praise made his stomach flutter in that stupid way it does when Felix wakes him up and that blinding smile and soft eyes are staring at him so fondly before that stupidly deep voice for someone like Felix whispers a good morning.
Only this flutter was a little different for some reason, and his ears were warm, and he hates that he knows what type of feeling it is and why he's feeling it. Sort of. He's still trying to fully grasp why he gets this type of feelings when Felix talk a certain way. He's not entirely sure if was the voice this time, because he felt nothing until the praise. So it has to be the praise right? Maybe he should end the break before he thinks too much and trails off to all sorts of other thoughts and gets a headache and more confusion.
DoolSetNet!:
Hyung I'm gonna stop sharing my screen now (5:42 PM)
DoolSetNet! stopped sharing their screen
DoolSetNet!:
Hyung? (5:43 PM)
Are you ok? (5:43 PM)
DoolSetNet!:
Are you still there? (5:51 PM)
I'm gonna talk now ok? (5:52 PM)
meowmo_puddingᓚᘏᗢ:
I'm good now (6:15 PM)
DooSetNet!:
you sure?
you wanna talk? (6:16 PM)
meowmo_puddingᓚᘏᗢ:
no but want you to (6:16 PM)
DoolSetNet!:
you want me to talk? (6:17 PM)
mewomo_puddingᓚᘏᗢ
yh (6:17 PM)
"A-are you sure? I talk a lot and you'll probably get annoyed if I just ramble.."
I'm sure
I like ur voice
"Okay.."
That should not fluster him as much as it did. Jisung knows he has a nice voice, his boyfriends tell him all the time in the studio, people comment on it in their songs whether he's rapping or singing. But never just because he's talking. His boyfriends say it sometimes sure, but that's only because he needs the reassurance when he starts anxiously rambling or starts info dumping on a hyperfixation and then overthinks their silence or short responses.
What should he even say? He's so nervous now, his mind blank. Minho has more than one cat, so he likes animals right? Jisung loves animals, they're all just so interesting and-
Jisung?
"S-sorry! My mind just went bank a-and I don't know what to talk about.."
Do you have any special intrests?
It's like a switch flipped in his brain at the question, because Jisung will take every opportunity he gets to talk about his special interests, or whatever he's currently hyper fixated on. And once he opened his mouth, he didn't stop until he got every single fact, thought, and all his knowledge on dinosaurs out of his head.
Jisung was smiling so much his cheeks hurts, because Minho was actually listening to him and asking questions. Then he asked what Jisung's favourites were and why, and Jisung was sure his face muscles would pull stiff from how long he's been smiling.
And that's how Minho spent two hours of his life, listening to Jisung talk about dinosaurs. He didn't think there was so much information one could possibly store in their brain, he also didn't know how someone could talk for three hours straight and not get sick of it. Maybe that was just a biased thought because Minho couldn't talk so consistently for even two minutes. He doesnt think he could talk for half an hour without breaks, he's kind of envious of Jisung.
Minho had so much to say, especially about his own special interests, but he couldn't get all the words out even if he tried. Other than his cats and special interests, he doesn't think he'd want to talk so much for so long anyway.
Jisung's dino rant eventually died down into an actual conversation between him and Minho. Minho kept texting while Jisung talked, and their conversations lasted for another hour before they calmed down into small comments here and there.
They didn't even realize how late it had gotten, but Minho could tell from how tired he was starting to feel and how soft and lazy Jisung's voice got. Minho could barely focus on the words coming out of Jisung's mouth, all he could think about is the way he sounded and what it was doing to him.
Maybe it was because of how late it was and the tiredness that came with it, maybe it was because of how little energy he had. Whatever it was, Minho was struggling to focus on anything other than the sound of Jisung's voice. He couldn't think straight, couldn't register anything other than how his voice made him feel. He's not even sure what the topic of conversation was, he stopped paying attention the moment Jisung's voice shifted. All he could do was hum out when necessary so Jisung could keep talking.
Minho was playing a dangerous game, he knew this, but he was too tired to care or even think about it. The fluttering in his stomach turned into heat coiling inside him, and his heartbeat got a little faster. Eventually Minho stopped responding and his thoughts drifted.
He thought back to when Jisung praised him. It meant nothing, just some innocent praise to make him feel good for talking when he was clearly struggling. Then it turned less innocent, more purposeful and Jisung's gentle voiced turned into the low and raspy he was currently talking in. Then the sentence changed altogether.
Good boy, Minho. You did so good.
Heat filled his every being, his cheeks and ears burning while his chest flutters and his eyes snap open (when did he close them?).
"Hyung? Minho-hyung? Hey, are you still there? Hyung, did you fall asleep?"
All the heat is instantly replaced with ice as guilt washed over him. What the hell was he thinking? How could he even think like that about Jisung? Is that even allowed? He has two boyfriends for fuck's sake! Not to mention they barely know each other, they don't even know what the other looks like. What's wrong with him? His best friend wasn't enough, now he's being a fucking sick bastard over someone he barely knows. At least Felix is single, Jisung is not.
"Ok, I'll just hang up if hyung's sleeping. It's late anywa-"
"I'm sorry!"
"..Hyung? It's ok if you fell asleep. Are you ok?"
"S-sorry.."
"It's okayyy it's super late anyway, it's like.. almost 11"
"W-what?"
"Yeah, I know. I didn't realize we've been talking for that long."
"I.. I didn't.. fall asleep..."
"Oh.. well, are you ok? You kinda went silent for a bit."
"I.. I d-don't know what-.. Don't know what h-happened. Just.. in my head?"
"Hm, you get lost in our head again?"
"Sort of..?"
"It's ok, I won't push. If hyung's ok, then it's all good. We don't need to talk about it, are you ok?"
"..I- Uhm.. I g-guess?"
"Then everything's all good! You tired? Do you usually stay up this late, hyung?"
"N-no.."
"Maybe that's it then, you just need to get some sleep."
Maybe.
It's probably part of it, anyway.
Wbu?
"What about me?"
R u usually up so late
"Sometimes. I can't sleep sometimes, for different reasons. I don't have sleep problems or anything, my brain's just loud all the time."
Loud? wdym
"Like... It's just always running a mile a minute I guess? Like I'm constantly thinking about something, doesn't matter what. Sometimes it's just hard to ignore and keeps me up."
Oh, that sucks
"It's whatever. I'd rather not sleep sometimes than struggle every night like Chan-hyung"
Chan-hyung?
Does he have insomnia or something?
"Or something. Ah- my eyes! Hyung what the hell?!"
Jisung?
"I know! Yes, I'm still with hyung, we were just wrapping up anyway."
Who r u talking to?
"Uh, sure, I guess. Sorry, hyung, Changbin-hyung's here."
Oh
"He came to put us to bed. (Yes, I did. Minho-hyung it's super late, you should head to bed. Normally I'd leave him, but he's got morning classes tomorrow and I don't want him keepingyou up incase you've got a morning class too.)"
"Oh.. o-okay."
"(Yeah, so goodnight hyung.)"
"G-goodnight, Chang.. Changbin-ah?"
"(Yup, night, hyung.) Goodnight, hyungie! We'll see you tomorrow, sleep well~"
"Ok, n-night, Jisungie"
12:00
Private messages between Minho! and Chan-hyung:)
Minho!:
Hyung I'm so sorry
I didn't mean to
I wasn't thinking
Please forgive me
I got horny
Over him
I'm so fucking sorry